Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Desperate Reflections ❯ Nameless Faces ( Chapter 5 )

A/N: Funny, Axel seems to be spending a lot of time waking up. Also, I have never played Chains of Memories, but I have read a plot summary of it. So my knowledge is limited. Any OOCness on the part of those Nobodies only met in Chains of Memories stems from that fact. Thanks.

Beta’ed by the lovely and sarcastic Azar Darkstar.

Chapter 3: Nameless Faces

He dreamed, but it made very little sense, just scattered images, people speaking with their voices all blurred together in an endless litany of nonsense, fading colors and swirling backgrounds. There were verdant islands, sunny skies, darkened chasms and perpetual deserts all blending into a collage of things he didn’t recognize. He felt the burning blaze of heat and fire, possibly his own inner magic. He relived the feeling of the power that flared inside of him, and all of it echoed within a sea of ocean blue.

Strange… so very strange.

And then, he awoke. He started suddenly, as if he was a drowning man finally able to get his head above water. Axel coughed and sputtered, drawing in heaving breaths of air and clutching at his heavy and pained chest. His entire body seemed to heave up as his head throbbed in sympathy, and his spasms lasted for several minutes until he was finally able to relax back against the now familiar bed, his head turning to the side.

He caught sight of Vincent then, who was staring out the window. He looked very deep in thought, which explained why he hadn’t noticed Axel’s earlier reaction. Crimson eyes simply continued to stare sightlessly out the window, rain steadily streaming outside.

The younger man frowned slightly, irritated at the lingering ache in his chest as he shifted about on the bed. “Vincent?” he questioned softly.

There was much he still didn’t understand or know. He remembered the cause for his unconsciousness, struggling through the cleansing, hearing someone call to him about a promise he couldn’t remember, and he shifted, pushing back some of the covers that had been carelessly thrown over him.

“Vincent?” Axel tried again. This time, he appeared to jump though the motion was barely visible, and he blinked once, perhaps twice before shifting his eyes to his companion.

“You’re awake,” the dark-hair man commented needlessly.

He couldn’t resist the urge to smirk. “Obviously. But you looked pretty out of it.”

Vincent brushed the comment aside. “How do you feel?” he asked.

Axel groaned as he completely threw back the covers and pulled his surprisingly aching body into a sitting position, and he swung his legs over the side of the bed, not minding his half-dressed state, wearing little more than a pair of darkly colored boxers.

“Like I took a dive off of a huge cliff.” His stomach growled. “And hungry, too,” he added with a slightly hopeful glance.

“Is that what you call a subtle way of asking me to feed you?” Vincent questioned almost amusedly as he rose with a twitch of his wings. Axel grinned up at him, forced himself to stand on wobbly legs, and followed the other male into the kitchen. Somehow, it still managed to surprise him every time he entered the homey environment.

As Axel flopped himself down into a chair at the table, he smirked, watching Vincent move around with that seemingly effortless grace. It was so damn… /domestic/ of him to be doing so, filling the teapot with water, poking around in the fridge for something to cook, and Axel couldn’t help himself when he shook his head and tapped a few fingers on the table. He never really thought of the other man as anything but intimidating before, but now… really, Vincent was just /cute/.

“What do you want?” he asked, never missing a beat as he peered into his sadly stocked refrigerator. He ate rarely himself, usually ordering some kind of take away. But perhaps he could find /something/ edible.

Axel hmm’ed, leaning back to prop one leg up on a chair. “Something breakfast-y,” he commented, choking back a laugh when the winged man nodded and began pulling things out of the fridge with effortless motion. It was strange that after such a short time he was already so comfortable in his presence.

“So… what do I do now?” Axel asked, disrupting the small moment of comfortable silence. The sound of clacking dishes, running water, and the gas stove hissing to life echoed around him.

Damn. He just couldn’t get over how freaking /domestic/ Vincent was. It cracked him up every time.

The dark-haired man raised a brow. “Do?” he returned, peering over his shoulder from where he was dropping butter into a pan.

Axel nodded. “Yes, do.” He twirled a hand in the air. “Like do I have a job? Now that I’m ‘Abarai’ what special little gifts does that give me?”

Vincent snorted. “You have an apartment, similar to mine down to the last square inch set in a building the same size and shape as this one. Conformity is the rule here. You have a job. I will take you to it later and introduce you to your ga-brother as well.”

The redhead’s ears perked up at this. “Oh, yeah. Those damn twits mentioned something about a ga-brother. What is it?”

“The twits?” His brow twitched. “You must be talking about the twins. They are number four’s favorite… creations.”

Vincent seemed to hesitate on the last word, something in his tone instantly making the younger male curious. There was a story there, he was certain of it, but he didn’t want to spoil the strangely genial mood that Vincent was in. He filed it away for later, however. On top of the identity of Cidrick Highwind, and why Vincent didn’t want to be called “Vince.”

“Uh huh,” replied Axel, watching him critically. However, he changed the subject. “Anyways, so this ga-brother?”

Vincent nodded to himself. “I recommended Reno – or Daunte as he is supposed to be known. He is a Guardian, like yourself, and one of the few that I managed to save. As a ga-brother, he is supposed to teach you about life on Gaia’s Grotto and educate you on your job and your function.”

Axel snorted. “You make it sound like we’re supposed to be robots.”

“In a way, we are,” the other man responded quietly. “After all, what is a creature without choice or memory but nothing more than a toy?”

A silence fell as Axel took in Vincent’s words, the only sound crackling of the oil in the pan. He was right, of course, judging by what Axel had seen for himself and what else Vincent had explained.

“This place is hell,” he muttered under his breath, slumping down in his seat.

“Yes,” Vincent agreed. “Though I’ve seen my share of hell before, I suppose you could say it is.” He paused, reaching forward to turn off the stove at the same moment that he reached for a plate in the cabinet. The smell of fried eggs and bacon permeated the air, accompanying the distinct grumble in Axel’s belly. Fighting against the Cleanser had taken more out of him than he had expected.

As Vincent dished out the food, a plate and tea for Axel and only a cup of tea for himself, the redhead watched him. He wondered how long Vincent had been on Gaia’s Grotto and just what secrets the man held in his heart. It was obvious he was trying to escape, most likely for the same reason that Axel was, and the younger male wondered, just what type of person could earn the heart of Vincent.

“Tell me more about this Reno, Daunte, whatever the hell I am supposed to call him,” Axel suggested once the plate of food was set before him. He wasted no time, quickly digging in with great gusto. Unsurprisingly, Vincent was a decent cook, far better than Axel would have done on his own at least.

The winged man sat in a chair across the table from him with grace, wrapping a clawed hand around his teacup. He didn’t watch Axel as he ate, preferring to stare at some undetermined spot on the wall.

“Outside with public ears and eyes, you will call him Daunte. If it is just he or I, you can call him Reno. I trust him, and you should be able to do so as well.” A slight smile graced Vincent’s lips as he locked eyes with the redhead. “I have a feeling that you two will get along fine. In many ways, you are a lot alike.”

Axel scoffed around a mouthful of scrambled eggs. “Doubt it,” he mumbled. “I’m an original. Got it memorized?”

Vincent merely gave him that knowing look, shifting slightly in his chair as his wings twitched and returned to his gazing of the not-so interesting wall. “A Guardian’s job is to… well, guard the gates of the city from the memory eaters. They are allowed to prey on those outside the city but are not allowed to come within. I was able to persuade the council that your intuition with your weapon was something you should keep, and due to this, you were lucky. They only used the basic Cleansing method.”

The scarlet-haired man frowned at Vincent’s use of the word “allowed.” It didn’t sit well in his belly, the same way that being on Gaia’s Grotto left him feeling ill.

“Allowed?” he questioned. “If this place is some damn paradise, then why the hell do the memory beasts exist to begin with?”

Vincent’s face took on such a range of emotions at his question that Axel’s mood darkened as well. Grim anger spiked with despair fluttered across his crimson eyes as a clawed hand unconsciously tightened around his teacup.

“From my understanding, it is the council who first created and set free the memory beasts.”

“What?!” His fork dropped from his hands with a clang, and Axel was on his feet before he knew it, palms slamming down against the table in outrage, causing the dinnerware to clatter loudly. Pure and fiery anger raced through him, burning like a fire, and flame licked in his green eyes. “They /created/ those things?” he demanded.

The winged man was unperturbed. “Gaia’s Grotto is a small world, no?” he explained calmly. “It is a way to… thin the herd, to judge the unworthy, not that the general populace even know of this.” The impassive expression returned to Vincent’s face, furthering Axel’s rage. How could the man sit there and just /say/ that without feeling the same anger?

“That’s wrong!”

-You can’t do this!-

“These are living beings!”

-Roxas is not your toy, Xemnas!-

Axel blinked even as the anger coursed through him, minor flashes of /something/ echoing through his mind. Words from his own rapidly fading past echoed in his ears even as he directed his ire at the man who could do nothing about it.

“Why don’t you feel something, dammit!?” He gestured wildly with one hand, slamming down the other once more on the table to emphasize his point.

Crimson eyes watched him with only the slightest flinch. “Axel,” said Vincent with that same eerily calm voice, almost as if he were speaking to a child. “Calm yourself. You’re burning my table.”

Eyelids shuttered over emerald eyes before the redhead looked down, barely registering that thin, grey smoke and the acrid smell of burning wood emanated from the wood beneath his palm, fire licking at the edges of his fingers. Slightly ashamed at his behavior, he took a deep, steadying breath before slowly removing his hand from the table, wincing at the mark left behind. Axel ran a hand through his hair before shooting the dark-haired man an apologetic glance.

“Go get dressed,” Vincent ordered, filling the silence. He took a sip of his tea before continuing though his gaze seemed fixated on the table. “Perhaps after you see what life is like here in Firdos you will better understand why I choose to react the way I do.”

Axel quickly deflated, nodded, and started for the bedroom before a thought struck him. “Firdos?” He half-turned back towards Vincent.

A sardonic and grim smile tugged at the corner of Vincent’s mouth. “The name of this particular city,” he explained succinctly. Crimson eyes burrowed into his own. “Once long ago, it meant Paradise.”

Axel snorted. “Paradise. Right.” Hands reflexively clenched at his side; it appeared that his rapidly changing emotions hadn’t faded as much as he had believed. Was it because he was unused to having them…

Wait! Where had that thought come from?

With a pensive glance towards his own self, brow furrowed in thought, Axel turned back towards the guest room in search of his clothing. He had the feeling that Firdos would be lucky if he didn’t set anything ablaze while “touring.”

~~~~~

The material was scratchy against his skin, the clothes heavy and suffocating. He felt as if insects were crawling over him, and the collar rose up too high on his neck. Axel kept tugging on it long after they had left Vincent’s home, trying to relieve the choking feeling. And the boots that he was given… they were hideous. Dark brown numbers with gold buckles that didn’t match the completely black ensemble he was given. And worse, the dark clothing made him seem paler than normal, his vibrant red hair even brighter.

On top of all that, he had been given an elastic band for his hair. It now stuck up in an unattractive spiky ponytail. He scowled at that.

The weather certainly didn’t help his discomfort either, not that it was unpleasant. It was just… there, tepid like a hot drink left sitting on the counter for too long. For once, rather than the usual downpour that Axel had grown accustomed to, the rain had slowed to a lazy trickle that slid down his skin and barely wetted his hair. Needless to say, he was doing a fine job of whining to Vincent, who was doing an even better job of ignoring him. Axel got the feeling that he had some sort of training in such a thing.

Occasionally the winged man would point out buildings, but otherwise, he was silent, unless answering one of Axel’s actual questions, and that suited the redhead just fine. He was really only grumbling for the sake of it. The boredom in Firdos was only exceeded by the sheer /grayness/ of it all.

Gaia’s Grotto just plain unnerved him. It was far too quiet, and still, the dead buildings were imposing statues against the cloudy sky. There was very little color, as if the world slowly bled all vibrancy from its residents. The concrete of the sidewalk beneath him was smooth, unmarred, squeaky clean even. He had the urge to litter just to disrupt the damn continuity of it. These people didn’t even have enough individual thought to throw their trash on the ground like the rest of the normal universe. It was highly unsettling.

And looking at the faces around them only increased his agitation. Gazing down from above, he could see their robotic movements, their almost hive-like motions. But on the ground, walking face to face or along with the path with them, he could see their expressions clearly… or in some cases the lack there of.

It wasn’t that they looked like walking puppets or that their eyes carried a blank stare, though in some cases that was true, it was just that they didn’t appear particularly enthused about anything. No one seemed deep in thought. No one was aggravated, worried, angry, happy. They were just there, and something gripped him inside as he looked at the faces of these random strangers. They were miserable and didn’t even know it.

Their smiles of greeting were false and without real emotion behind them. Laughter sounded hollow and cold, just echoing. Even the sound of the crowd’s footsteps was more a rhythm than the cacophony of off beat steps, and Axel felt vastly out of place, almost like there was a sign over his head that said, “He has his memories!” in big neon, flashing lights. Fortunately, he was consoled by Vincent’s presence at his side, the other man’s impassive air perfectly mimicking those around them. However, the redhead didn’t know if he could school his own into such expressions.

It was enough for him to understand why Vincent’s anger was not as fiery as perhaps when he had first arrived. There was nothing his fury could accomplish; nothing his rage would suffice. These people had no idea of their situation. How could one be suffering without knowing they were under sufferance? And his irritation with Vincent quickly deflated, though he didn’t say so aloud.

His gaze roamed over the nameless faces, registering men, women, even children… young ones that were turned into the Heartless or the Nobodies. It was a sad thing. Or perhaps they had been born here; he couldn’t really say. Yet, he still managed to catch a glimpse of color here and there, but it was muted, dimmed. But then, there was a flash of something, and his attention was diverted.

Rose pink.

He thought he saw it, and he swiveled his head to the side, only to see a girl, or more precisely a woman, tending to what appeared to be a garden of dull and listless flowers, the first of its kind. The stranger straightened, half-turned towards Axel. She wore all black like most other residents, conforming nicely to a well-built chest, and he shook his head at that, changing his original opinion. This definitely was not a woman. It was a man with pink hair feathered about his face and piercingly cold, blue eyes that…

…always seemed to stare right through him. He resisted the urge to fidget, however, completely unintimidated by the Nobody of the Flower element, despite his skill. Above all things, Marluxia was rather new, and Axel had been around longer than him. He didn’t care if the castle belonged to the pink man. He still had seniority, or would have if he hadn’t decided to somewhat join Marluxia and Larxene’s attempts to overthrow the Organization.

Axel himself was leaning up against the wall, calmly regarding Marluxia with an even stare as the other male related his plans. “Vexen will more than likely fail. Kill him when he does. And quickly,” he casually ordered. One black-gloved hand settled over the leaves of one of his many plants, almost caressing the vegetation.

The redhead had his arms crossed over his chest as he relaxed against the wall, one booted foot draped over the other. “You’ve got an evil streak in you, Mar,” he commented with a lazy drawl before slowly pushing his body up off the wall.

Cold eyes flickered to him again as a sneer marred Marluxia’s lips. “Do your job, Axel. I don’t need the witless comments.”

Axel’s smirk turned into a lazy grin, one that he prided himself on as he gestured with one hand. “Okay, okay, keep your skirt on, oh Graceful Assassin,” he mocked. “I’ll kill the sniveling bastard, no problem.”

“Your flippancy is irritating.” Marluxia scowled, tossing his head before returning his attention to the plants, which seemed to occupy nearly every available inch of space within his rather spacious living quarters. Compared to Axel’s own, Marluxia might as well have been king of the castle. Or was that Queen?

He resisted the urge to chuckle aloud.

“If you wanted a mindless minion, you shouldn’t have chosen someone who doesn’t give a damn,” he replied dismissively, just to further annoy the somewhat stuffy Nobody. He flipped his wrist at him in a vague sort of goodbye. “I do what I do for me and me alone. Got it memorized?” His booted feet quickly carried him to the door, already feeling the thrill of the chase in hunting down Vexen. Sometimes, it was more fun that way rather than using the darkness corridors.

That was until something barreled into him from the side, throwing him against the wall. The breath flew from his lungs, his back forced against the wall. A solid coalescence of flower petals pushed against him, neatly restraining his body, as if they were shackles and bands of iron or steel. He could scarcely breathe, feeling the petals’ sharp edges trying to cut through the black leather of his Organization- issued uniform.

Now, Marluxia smirked, taking in Axel’s predicament with an amused air. The firestarter could easily burn away the flowers and the petals with just a tiny burst of his magic, but he was half-curious… and Marluxia had yet to finish serving his purpose. So Axel remained quiet, watching the other male with a wary glare as he lazily stalked towards him, a flower pinched between two leather-gloved fingers.

“Whatever little manipulations you have planned in that pea-sized brain of yours won’t work, little boy,” Marluxia informed him snottily, sidling so close that Axel could smell that usual flowery, /pansy/ smell that the man always emanated. “You can’t save him so just do your damn job,” he whispered icily before turning abruptly away and summoning a portal of darkness with a wave of his hand.

The moment Marluxia exited through the clinging tendrils of darkness, the petals Axel disappeared in a rosy twinkle of light that…

…seemed to flicker in recognition, but only for a moment before they turned back to their work in the garden, digging up weeds with smooth and effortless motions. Axel blinked, a strange sort of vertigo assailing him at both the clarity of the memory and the speed with which he witnessed it. He hadn’t even finished taking a step by the time it flashed through his mind.

Or was it even a memory?

He and Vincent passed by the odd man, and he took another glance, but those blue eyes did not look up again. That shiver of acknowledgment faded from his senses, and he was left with a vague feeling of unease, the memory already seeming to weaken in his thoughts.

He frowned. That had been strange.

“Something wrong?” The smooth tenor of Vincent’s voice broke through the haze of non-comprehension. He looked up as crimson eyes gazed at him worriedly. Yet, there was nothing to say.

He shook his head. “No. I was just…” The redhead paused, a sudden thought striking him. He changed subjects. “Do you think when we leave that all our memories will return?” He pushed all thoughts of Marluxia, rose hair, and sudden daydreams from his mind. It was probably only a fluke. He hadn’t really recognized that person. It was a strange sort of coincidence.

Vincent frowned, his concern deflected momentarily. “I really can’t say. No one knows because if anyone has been able to escape, they haven’t bothered to return for the rest of us.” His wings twitched as his gaze fell to the sidewalk, a hand curling unconsciously at his side. “We might even have to start all over again, searching for what we were once more.”

That thought was depressing, but no more so than the next question that he hadn’t considered up until that moment. “We died, and that’s how we came to be here,” Axel began slowly. “Then… will we not exist outside of Gaia’s Grotto?”

“Again, that is something I cannot predict,” Vincent responded slowly, brief flashes of bright fangs glinting in Axel’s keen eye. “But I do believe it is worth the risk.”

The other male grinned as he shrugged lazily. “Anything is better than this hellhole,” he commented, tilting his head back to gaze up at the sky. He didn’t care that the raindrops were falling on his face or in his eyes. He stared up at a perpetually grey sky, the clouds nothing more than a smooth cap that did nothing for the imagination.

Vincent did not respond, but Axel wasn’t surprised. He contented himself with allowing his mind to wander, turning about the recent flashback he had had. As he did, the low, almost mournful notes of an unfamiliar tune began to float through the air.

Music? In Gaia’s Grotto? Was there even such a thing?

His brow furrowed in confusion as he leveled his eyes to search around, ears straining for the next refrain. He was disappointed. It sounded like a guitar, accompanied by a voice that caused a vague flutter of recognition.

“What is it?” Vincent questioned, noticing the look on Axel’s face.

Green eyes searched the pedestrians with their blank stares that milled about him. “They allow music here?” he asked in return.

“Among other things,” Vincent answered. “But you’ll find it’s not like you remember.” He gestured ahead of them to a small park. “It is likely that the music you hear is being played there.”

The redhead nodded in understanding, now immensely curious. Gaia’s Grotto didn’t strike him as the type to allow something as frivolous as music. He had even wondered if they were allowed to have relationships with one another. And for some reason, the closer they drew to the small park, the more his heart beat faster in his chest in anticipation. He wasn’t sure why. Perhaps it was because the tune seemed vaguely familiar to him. Almost like an echo of a memory.

They approached the park where a small crowd of people had already gathered. The two of them made their way through the onlookers until they were in the front row, in clear sight of the musician. There wasn’t much to be said about the man with a guitar, though he did have a companion with him. Both were obviously male. But it was the one with the musical instrument and voice that attracted Axel the most. He had blond hair in a bizarre style with soft, azure eyes that should have held a familiar warmth and a smile that…

…for once was strangely absent. His shoulders slumped, his eyes having lost their usual exuberant charm. Axel was instantly on alert, wondering why fear was reflected in Demyx’s eyes.

Wait, that was silly. Nobodies didn’t have feelings.

Nevertheless, he knew at first glance that all was not well with his musical friend. It was dark around them, just as it always was in the World That Never Was, rain dripping somberly from the skies and causing a light, engulfing mist to spread about them.

“I’ve got my new orders.” Demyx was the first to speak, his voice carrying something that could have been fear and anxiety. He shook his head, blond locks swaying. “They so got the wrong guy for this.”

Axel managed a smirk as he reached forward and ruffled the hair of his friend. “What?” he teased. “You gotta work with Xigbar again?”

Instead of a slight smile, Demyx irritably shoved his hand away. “I’m being serious,” the older Nobody snapped. “Xemnas wants me to kill Roxas.”

Green eyes stared at him, unbelieving. “You mean Sora.”

“Whatever,” the blond dismissively expressed. He flipped his wrist at Axel, fixing him with a serious look, all anger draining from his face. “I’m scared, Axel.” He ignored the other Nobody’s scoff. “I don’t know how that’s possible since I don’t have emotions, but I am.” Something bothered Axel about the look in Demyx’s eyes, as if he could actually see the boy’s fear and anxiety, and a strange feeling curled in his stomach. He didn’t like it at all, and to chase it away, he tried teasing the blond again, acting flippant.

“What did you do to piss Xemnas off?” he questioned lazily.

Demyx squared his jaw, half turning from Axel to glare off into the misty gloom. “Dammit! This isn’t funny!” he snapped. He paused, obviously trying to get a hold on himself as he breathed heavily. “You don’t get it, do you?” he continued lowly. “You still deny it.”

Axel’s brow furrowed in confusion, running a hand through his hair. “What are you talking about, Dem?”

“We’re Nobodies, Axel!” the musician exclaimed, waving his hands about to enunciate his point. “Don’t you understand? When we die, we’re nothing.” An odd expression took over Demyx’s normally cheery face as a laughter that could only be described as bitter erupted from his lips. “If we’re even something to begin with.”

The redhead Nobody frowned, daring to step closer to his friend. He put a hand on each of Demyx’s shoulders, staring deep into his eyes. “What are you saying?” he asked, not sure if he liked the gleam he saw emanating from the depths.

“Have you even /seen/ the power in that kid?” Demyx responded. At Axel’s expression he waved a hand of dismissal. “Nevermind. Yeah, you have. I can’t stand up to that. I’m going to die. There’s no other conclusion.” His voice dropped as his gaze did as well, his head tilting to the side. “I don’t want to become nothing,” he added in a peculiar sort of mumble, hands clenching at his side.

Green eyes softened. “You could leave, you know.” He couldn’t help but think of Roxas, even as the words tumbled from his lips. “No one’s making you stay.”

The form beneath his hand tensed as Demyx shot him a hard look. “You’re in this Organization… and you can /still/ say that?” he retorted, giving an entire body shudder. “Xemnas would hunt me down and kill me.” The blond shook his head. “No, he would torture me before allowing death. I’d prefer Sora’s method. At least, I know I won’t suffer.”

But once he started, it was as if he could not stop. His body continued to shake with fear and worry, anxiety over what he had been ordered to do, despite knowing his limitations. As a Nobody, it wasn’t odd that he should not look forward to death. No one really knew what happened when a Nobody died. They just assumed they would fade into nothingness, which was perhaps the reason they had crafted the plan to regain their hearts.

“Dem…”

The musician shook his head, taking a step backwards and disengaging himself from Axel’s touch. “I’ll try not to hurt Roxas too much,” he said softly, unable to look his friend in the eye. “Goodbye, Axel.” And with that, he turned and walked off into the gloomy mists.

Axel couldn’t stop him. He wouldn’t stop him because he knew that Demyx was right. It hurt, even though he didn’t have feelings, that strange twisting in his gut, painful like a knife. His only friend outside of Roxas was walking away from him as well. Were all the ones he cared for destined to leave him alone?

He sighed, anger and bitter, as he ran an anxious hand through his hair before turning on his heels and heading in the opposite direction from Demyx. However, even as he stalked away, he couldn’t help but remember what once…

…was reserved only for the greyish-blue haired man next to him. They were obviously a couple, judging by the way the other man was touching the musician and running hands through his hair. Yet, their eyes were lacking in any real emotion, more mechanical than anything. Axel blinked as yet another strange flash seemed to attack him, he couldn’t seem to stop staring at the man who looked so much like the Demyx from his memories. He blinked again, jerking slightly when something warm slid down his cheek.

He reached up to press a finger to it, coming away with a moistened fingertip. It had been a tear. He stared at the drop of moisture in surprise, jaw gaping as he returned his gaze to the musician.

“What’s wrong?” Vincent’s voice came from his side, and Axel turned towards him. Crimson eyes were narrowed in concern.

He shook his head. “I’m not sure,” the redhead replied softly, gaze shifting towards the musician, who was smiling his dead grin and beginning another tune. Axel’s hand was still held before him, the single tear slowly drying on the tip of a finger. “For a minute there…”

“You thought you saw someone you recognized,” Vincent finished for him, understanding taking over his features.

Axel sucked in a breath, tearing his eyes away from the musician. He was surprised at the depth of emotion he found in Vincent’s eyes. It was something he had very rarely seen in the other man, who usually kept such things tightly restrained within. It left the firestarter very curious, and he ran a shaky hand through his hair.

“I got flashes of /something/,” he explained, wincing ever-so-slightly. “Made my damn head hurt.”

Vincent nodded in understanding before turning away, leading them out of the crowd gathered to hear the music. “You are likely not the only one who has ended up here,” he began quietly, a faint twinge of some emotion to his voice, one that Axel had yet to identify. “I’ve recognized several, but I was not able to save them.” Vincent’s tone dropped then to barely more than a whisper as sadness reverberated around them, echoing with nearly the volume of a gunshot.

“They won’t remember me then,” Axel stated flatly, eyes narrowing as he ran another hand through his hair.

The winged man shook his head, his gaze falling to the ground as they headed further from the crowd and back into the anonymity of the sidewalk, heading towards their yet unnamed destination. “Most likely not. Perhaps for them, it may even be better that way.”

Silence fell between them as Axel absorbed his words. Like everything else on Gaia’s Grotto, they both depressed and angered him. It was infuriating how a world could seem like the perfect paradise but be only a thin cover-up for a beautified hell. Smiles were false, music hollow, relationships mechanical, and it sickened him. Literally. He felt ill every time he had to look into the faces or eyes of the general populace. It pissed him off more than anything, however. He felt the strongest urge to storm to the council and raze it all to the ground, laughing as the damned scientists went up in flames. His fingers twitched at his side at the thought.

The redhead cleared his throat as he shook his head, deciding to change the subject of their conversation before he chose to go through with that mental image. “You said that they would give me a home?” he inquired, turning his head to look at the other male.

Vincent nodded. “Yes. After I introduce you to Daunte, I will take you there.”

“Oh, joy,” Axel drawled in response. “I can hardly contain my excitement.”

Vincent shook his head. “Your enthusiasm is duly noted,” he deadpanned.

The firestarter sighed as he folded his arms behind his head, tilting his gaze back to regard the sky once more. The emotionless, nameless faces around them unnerved him, and he preferred not to look at them.

“You haven’t a comedic bone in your entire body,” he muttered under his breath.

“On the contrary,” Vincent pointed out, “I’ve been known to crack many a joke in my time.” He paused, pursing his lips in thought. “It’s a shame that the memory beasts have consumed so many of them. I can’t even remember one.”

Axel glared at him from the corner of his eye as he huffed quietly. “Are we there yet?” he asked, waving one hand to vaguely gesture to the area around them.

“Oddly enough, yes,” Vincent replied. Without missing a beat, he turned right along the sidewalk onto a much smaller pathway. He gestured ahead of them, pointing directly at a towering wall of grey stone with a set of incredibly massive gates, and Axel could do nothing but stare in surprise for several moments as he took in what he was to be guarding the following day. The wall itself was beyond climbing height. He doubted anything could scale the smooth and seamless stone. They were wide enough for guards to patrol the top, though there were few within sight.

The gates themselves were large structures, built entirely of wood with thick, iron bandings across them. For the moment, they were open, swung inwards to admit those that managed to make it through the plains alive. Above, there was a small rampart where one guard patrolled, managing to both look bored and completely impassive, even with his robotic movements.

Axel’s gaze centered on the gate and the one man standing there, leaning nearby an open door, almost appearing asleep. His arms were crossed over his belly, head drooping down with his eyes closed. Beyond him, Axel could glimpse the plains outside of Firdos. The flat, foamy green stared back at him unassumingly, as if they did not contain bloodthirsty beasts and a person’s last chance for freedom. He shivered unintentionally, returning his attentions to the strawberry-haired man that was still paying them no mind. He knew without saying that this was Reno.

Interesting enough, the man was very similar to himself in appearance, or so Axel noted. He was tall with long legs encased in black slacks and a lithe build, and his bright, red hair was spiked about his face, while the rest of it was pulled into a low ponytail. Two scars… or tattoos, Axel couldn’t be sure, arced across the man’s sharp cheekbones, and the white dress shirt he wore had the top two buttons undone, revealing the pale flesh of his thin collarbone.

Next to Axel, Vincent cleared his throat loudly as they approached the nonchalant man. “Daunte,” he said reprovingly, “you don’t appear to be protecting anything.”

A smirk curved on the corner of the pale man’s lips, but he didn’t open his eyes, instead tilting his head slightly to the side. “I took down three of the damned beasts today, yo. It only makes sense that I deserve a rest.” He spoke in a lazy drawl, his voice carrying an edge of steel and danger but also teasing as well, and Axel knew in that moment that Reno was one who hadn’t forgotten himself.

Vincent frowned. “Three,” he echoed. “That is more than the usual.”

Reno shrugged, shifting position to cross one leg over the other. His smirk turned into a full-blown grin. “I heard you acquired a new squeeze toy,” he commented before popping open one eye, revealing the brightest blue iris that Axel had ever seen, and looking directly at Vincent. “It’s about time, yo.”

The winged man sighed as he reached upwards and rubbed a clawed finger over his forehead. “You’re going to get caught,” he commented, looking at the younger man.

But Reno seemed to ignore him because in that moment, his gaze fell on Axel. Both eyes opened as he grinned and pushed himself off the wall, stalking towards them with his uniquely bright eyes centered on Axel. His movements were panther-like, a feline grace along with its hunger, his confidence apparent in every step. It was plainly obvious that he feared little.

“Cer’, you sly dog,” the newcomer continued. “Is this him?” Reno queried as he stood before Axel, though he shifted his eyes towards the dark-haired man, head tilted to the side. “He’s hot, yo… and a bit like me. Is this your subtle way of saying you’re finally going to sleep with me?”

Axel crossed his arms over his chest in amusement as Vincent sighed, fully prepared to say something. The winged man’s slight smile betrayed any attempts at true aggravation, however, proving his true feelings.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he chastised. “Abarai is--“

He was cut off by Reno once more. “Oh?” the other man questioned, swiveling his bright gaze back towards Axel. “Abarai, hmm?” He leaned close enough that Axel caught his crisp scent and his warm breath ghosted over the flesh of his ear and neck. “If you know dear Ceran here, then it stands to say that you have a real name. Right?”

Axel smirked. “It’s Axel,” he claimed, keeping his tone as low as Reno’s. “A-X-E-L. Got it memorized?”

The newcomer chuckled as he pulled back, shooting Vincent an amused look, and he slung an arm around Axel’s shoulders, halfway leaning his weight on the taller boy. “Yeah, man, carved in stone.” He grinned broadly. “I like him, Ceran. Is he a new companion to our worthy cause?”

Axel found the slight twitching of Vincent’s eyebrow amusing. He could see that the man was not truly annoyed, which it made it so very endearing. Vincent eyed his red-headed companions, wings fluttering faintly behind him, and he crossed his arms over his chest as he fixed Reno with his most disproving glare. That coupled with the blood-red of his eyes might have been frightening to anyone else.

“You’re reckless, Daunte,” he finally admonished. “Acting like this. Someone’s bound to notice.” He gestured a clawed hands towards Axel. “Abarai is your ga-brother, not my lover.” At the widening of Reno’s smirk, Vincent sighed and amended his statement. “Neither are you to be.” The last was directed plainly at Reno.

The older redhead chuckled. “A pity,” he commented under his breath, directing his statement at Axel before giving an exaggerated sigh and attempting a pout at Vincent as he spoke to him straightforwardly. “Ne, Ceran, get off your soapbox, yo. Don’t worry so damn much.” He adjusted the dark sunglasses, pushing his hair further up his forehead with one finger.

“With one as reckless as you, concern is a given,” Vincent returned stoically.

Reno laughed, unperturbed by the winged man’s behavior. “So… Abarai,” he started, changing the subject. “You’re my ga-brother so you’re going to work the gates. What can you do?”

Axel raised a brow but smirked at the same time. He held up one hand, palm upwards as his lips curled further. As Reno watched with interest, emerald eyes flashed twice before a flame began to lick on the edges of Axel’s palm, orange and deadly. With a flip of the wrist, the small orb of fire leapt and exploded. When the flash faded, Axel was twirling a chakram on one finger, clearly pleased with himself. It was the first time he had attempted to call his weapon and magic purposefully.

Reno whistled. “Impressive,” he noted.

Before Axel could comment further, a loud clap of thunder rose through the air, causing him to jump several feet in the air as lightning flashed just to his right, searing the concrete and blackening the sidewalk. Reno’s weight abruptly disappeared from his shoulders, and as Axel turned to investigate, he found his throat was faced with a weapon very unfamiliar to him though judging by the currents racing along the tip of it, dangerously close to his skin, it was easily recognized as a threat.

He conceded to Reno’s skill. “Lightning,” he commented with a slight tilt of his head, noticeably away from the strange rod-like weapon. He dispersed his chakram as he continued speaking. “Shocking.” Reno smirked as he retracted his weapon. He spun it around his fingers before it disappeared into thin air.

“If you two are finished showing off, perhaps it is time for Abarai and I to be on our way,” Vincent inserted smoothly. Both redheads turned to regard the older man with amusement.

Reno chuckled as he shook his head. “Ne, Ceran, before you do that, how about grabbing me something to eat?” he questioned, rubbing his stomach for emphasis. “It’s a long time before the end of my day, and my partner hasn’t come to work yet.”

Vincent sighed. “If you wanted to speak to Abarai alone you would have merely needed to ask,” he responded as he stretched out his wings with a slight rustle. “But I will find you a lunch. I can’t have my favorite Guardian dying on me just yet.” With that, he rose into the air with a smooth wave of his wings.

After Vincent’s departure, Axel turned his full attention on his new ga-brother. Reno intrigued him, and he wondered what the story behind him was as well.

“It’s strange,” Reno said, speaking before Axel could even ask him a question. The blue-eyed man was watching Vincent fly away, an odd look on his face.

“Strange?” Axel echoed.

Reno nodded, tilting his head to sweep his gaze once more over Axel’s form. The newcomer to Gaia had the distinct feeling that he was being appraised, judged, in a far different manner than he had before. It irritated him, and he scowled, uncertain what Reno thought he was looking for. A moment passed before the man blinked and strode his direction, moving to stand directly in front of Axel.

“He acts different around you.”

Axel raised a brow. “You mean he’s normally more friendly and comical?”

Reno laughed, shaking his head. “Not to my knowledge. But I’ve known Ceran for the better part of five years. He sees something in you. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have bothered introducing you to me.”

A sudden thought, one which never occurred to him considering the way the older man had spoken, crossed Axel’s mind. “Are you and he…” Axel trailed off, uncertain how to voice the rest of his question. Although Vincent had originally denied it, he also knew how intensely private the man was. It wouldn’t surprise him if Vincent had flippantly referred to it in order to dissuade Axel from the truth. It wasn’t outright lying but not exactly truthful either.

“No,” Reno responded succinctly, as if to ensure that Axel understood nothing else from his words. “There’s nothing but friendship between us. He saved me, after all.”

Axel eyed him. “You want there to be more.”

Again, the older man shook his head, gaze shifting to some far off distance as one hand came up towards his head. He tapped the sunglasses on his forehead, holding back the shaggy crimson locks.

“I’ve got someone waiting for me, yo,” he responded by way of answer. “Even if he never said another word, I know that he’s waiting. Sinfully sexy though Vincent may be, I’ve more a thing for taller, darker men.”

“Then you think he and I have something.”

Reno shrugged, returning his distant gaze back to Axel. “I can’t even begin to guess. You’re here in front of me, so I can deduce that you have someone waiting for you, too. I won’t ask. This place has the uncanny ability of taking every fucking memory you have and leaving you with nothing.”

Axel didn’t respond, unsure what he could say to such a statement. However, that didn’t bother Reno in the slightest. He continued speaking, his tone taking a serious note different from the playful tune of earlier.

“This is a city of secrets, lots of ‘em. You hoard them like they are precious because here your memories are as vaulable as gold or silver. And Ceran is like a pillar, strong, unyielding. Never once has he relinquished his hold on his memories and never once have I seen him crack or falter.” Reno shook his head. “He’s a much stronger man than me, yo. Even I don’t know how long he’s been here.”

The younger redhead cocked his head to the side. “Why are you telling me this?” he inquired, slightly confused. “You didn’t have to send him away for that.”

Reno eyed Axel, his uniquely blue gaze disconcerting the way it pierced through him. “I want you to take care of him.”

Axel’s brows rose nearly to his hairline in surprise. “Ceran’s not a child. He’s been doing fine without me before.”

“He’s more fragile than you think,” Reno countered softly, his voice taking on an almost affectionate tone. “He’s just too damn stubborn to admit it, yo.”

Axel had to admit that he was confused. “Why me?” he responded. “Why not you?” He had known Vincent for less than three days, and while he liked the older man, he wasn’t certain what Reno wanted from him. It wasn’t as if Vincent was dying to spill all his secrets.

It was Reno’s turn to give Axel a questioning look. “You won’t do it?” And just the way he asked that question had the Chakram-wielder riddled with guilt, as if he were the lowest of the low for refusing to help someone who saved his life. And Reno knew it, the bastard. Axel couldn’t just say no, especially not when he remembered that look in Vincent’s eye when he called him “Vince.”

The firestarter exhaled loudly, running a hand through his hair. “You’re not making much sense. I’m not sure what you want me to do,” he replied, his words in themselves a concession. Vincent certainly didn’t appear to need Axel’s presence.

“Ceran thinks that you hold the key to our prison,” Reno stated bluntly.

His jaw dropped as emerald eyes widened in surprise. “He told you that?”

Reno waved a hand of dismissal, pausing to adjust his glasses once more as he tilted his head back. “Among other things, yes.” He hesitated, as if considering his next words. One hand fiddled with the shirttail of his dress shirt. “Ceran believes you know something that will be the answer.”

Axel was speechless. Vincent had indicated nothing to him like that, but before he could voice any further questions, the sound of approaching wings interrupted him. That lazy smirk returned to Reno’s face as Vincent landed near to them, boots barely making a sound as they touched ground. In one clawed hand, he carried a paper sack that rustled with his movements, Axel’s belly rumbling at the aroma coming from it. Yet, not even the slight hunger could dissuade the other emotions churning inside of him, especially considering Reno’s last revelation, one that he had not been expecting.

Though Vincent was speaking to the other redhead, Axel didn’t hear a word of what he was saying, nor did he care that he was going to interrupt them. Fiery irritation and anger, both of which always seemed to build up so quickly within him, burned their way through his senses, leaving him rude and without care.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he demanded, instantly garnering the attention of both men. He fixed them with a glare, though his eyes were trained solely on the dark-haired man.

Vincent half-turned towards him, glancing over a shoulder and the crest of one webbed wing. “Tell you what?” His face was impassive, his voice eerily calm as always.

Emerald eyes narrowed as Axel’s hands waved about in no coherent fashion, displaying his inner turmoil. “I dunno,” he spat sarcastically. “That you think I’m going to be some hero. Like I have all the answers!”

The winged man sighed, turning his back on Reno as he faced Axel. The other redhead dug into his lunch, eavesdropping on their conversation.

“Does you knowing I believe this change the fact that you do or don’t have the capability?”

Axel growled as he squared his jaw. “Don’t play your mind games with me.”

Vincent shook his head. “I am not. I am merely saying that it served no purpose to let you know what I believed. Truthfully, I didn’t want you to feel that pressure, especially after seeing and knowing all that you do now.”

“Then you really do care,” he replied sarcastically. He sneered. “I’m touched.” His aggravation stemmed much from the feelings of being used that coursed through him. As if Vincent had only helped him to help himself that he had suffered through the Cleansing for someone else was something that enraged him. He wanted to find Roxas! That was his choice. Or was it? He couldn’t even be sure of that anymore.

“Don’t be ungracious,” Vincent snapped sharply. “I apologize for not telling you before, but I did not think it relevant.”

Axel crossed his arms over his chest as he glared, another stare regarding him evenly in return. He didn’t fail to notice that Reno was smirking and chuckling to himself in the background either. He did not know what the other man found so amusing. However, he was finding it difficult to keep his anger with Vincent when the man was refusing to argue with him. It left him feeling the immature one, which he was sure Vincent intended, the smug bastard.

Or maybe it wasn’t that he was angry with the other male… more like irritated and fed up from everything he had learned: about Firdos, the Council, Gaia’s Grotto… the nameless faces that didn’t even know of their plight. He had nowhere to direct his fury at, and Vincent was the closest, easiest target.

Axel let out an aggravated and weary sigh as he rolled his eyes, looking anywhere but at the winged man. “I’m not a pawn,” he insisted, the words escaping from his mouth before he realized it. They echoed faintly within him, as if somehow, he had once thought them before. He frowned in thought. It was just another vague memory.

Vincent shook his head. “I didn’t say you were. It’s entirely up to you whether or not you help us.”

The Chakram-wielder couldn’t help but scoff. “So /now/ it’s my choice.”

“It’s always been your choice,” the dark-haired man argued back in return, a bit of annoyance beginning to register in his tone. His eyes flashed tiredly.

The rustling of a paper bag suddenly intruded on their argument as Reno moved to intervene. He slung an arm across Axel’s shoulder, managing the feat easily as they were about the same height, before pulling the younger boy towards him.

“Now, now,” he tutted. “No fighting boys. We can’t have that in Paradise.” The hand around Axel came up and ruffled his hair, messing up his ponytail. “No need to get angry, Abarai. And, Ceran, quit being so damn enigmatic, yo. Explain something for once, ya tight lipped bastard. We’re all friends here.”

Axel snorted, but he found that his anger was melting away. “I’m not angry,” he denied. “I’d just prefer to know certain important details from time to time.”

“Right,” Reno responded with a disbelieving smirk. He pulled away from Axel, shrugging as he threw up both hands in a gesture of defeat. “See? This is why I say that you stubborn bastards are perfect for each other,” Reno continued, seemingly speaking to no one. Both Axel and Vincent ignored the ranting redhead as they returned their attentions to each other.

“Now, that you’ve met Daunte, I believe I promised to show you your apartment, correct?” Vincent questioned, smoothly changing the subject. The tension had not dissipated between them, Axel still struggling with his ire, but it was lessened.

The firestarter nodded affirmatively, arms still crossed over his chest.

“Very well then,” Vincent responded. He broke off their unofficial staring contest and half turned to regard his friend. “Daunte, I’m taking Abarai to his home now. Am I correct in assuming you will be making sure he gets to work in a timely fashion?”

The older redhead paused in his contemplation of his empty lunch bag. “Unless, of course, my assistance won’t be needed,” he answered, shooting Vincent a cheeky grin and Axel a meaningful look.

The crimson-eyed man sighed, one clawed finger lightly rubbing his temple. “Get back to work. You’re lucky the beasts haven’t attacked,” he ordered, shooting Reno a slight glare before heading towards the main sidewalk, cloak swishing about him dismissively.

He just laughed, flipping his wrist in goodbye. “Always a pleasure, yo,” he called after the departing man. “See ya tomorrow, Abarai!”

With only the slightest of sighs and a playful fake salute to Reno, Axel followed. It was back into the crowd for him, heading towards the building that was to be his home. Beside him, Vincent was silent, seemingly locked deeply within broody thought, perhaps brought upon by their recent, albeit brief, argument. Reno’s words rang clear in his mind, his request echoing like some vague mantra. He had but one question to ask himself now. Did Vincent really need him?

Glancing up at the man, Axel was beginning to think that it just might be possible. Besides, he couldn’t cook worth a shit, and he’d be damned if he’d starve to death on Gaia’s Grotto before seeing Roxas again.

Fair was fair, after all.

***

A/N: I know that there is not much Roxas in this chapter. But this story /is/ Axel-centric, after all.

Thanks for reading! Please review!