Legend Of Zelda Fan Fiction ❯ The Legend of Link: Lucky Number 13 ❯ Stay Calm ( Chapter 29 )

Disclaimer: I don't own The Legend of Zelda or the cast. They're all property of Nintendo. I just own the perverted mind and ideas to do this to them. As always, if you don't like long drawn out fan fics stop reading now because it only gets longer.

Story Info: This will be mainly told through Link's point of view. For you Zelda heads out there, I'll say this; he doesn't get her in this one. So, if that news disturbs you stop reading. The following also contains large quantities of angst and a couple, if not a few characters will be of my own making. Without any further interruptions, I present to you, The Legend of Link: Lucky Number 13.

Chapter twenty-nine

The walk home has been long, but it hasn't cleared my mind any. Link fell asleep a few hours ago-and I think I may have given the boy an ego with the quip about the piercing. Maybe it was for the better, since I've done nothing but hide him like some secret shame. Heh, that's exactly what I've done. I went to bed with a woman I considered my daughter, and impregnated her. It's still funny how I was the only person still seeing it that way. Somewhere between my skillful beatings and Rampart, her hatred vanished. I went from the guy you wanted to kill to a good friend. No, I never knew or even sensed those feelings within her. In hindsight, I suppose shouldn't be surprising.

It started like this…

After the things involving Rampart died down, we began the lessons again. She went into it hard-training for hours on end without pause-like she was possessed. I'd made up something to the tune of, "You'll only lose the skills if you never wanted them." That's what I told her when she asked about getting rusty a few years prior. Apparently, she took it to heart because Sepaaru was anything but rusty. Anyway, speed up until we're a year down the road. Nabooru informs me of another one of those traditions and I was keen on this one. Before she told me though, it just seemed like Sepaaru called Varia out for no reason. In truth, she was exercising her right to challenge for the position of Captain of the guards.

Nabooru and me took a seat on the roof to get a better view. So, the sisters square off and go at it. This match put my style versus theirs in a test to see whose was better. Well, that's what I saw it as anyway. From the looks of things in the beginning, though, mine sucked. Varia isn't landing anything with the swords yet, but her fists and feet were tattooing Sepaaru like stink on shit. I was getting pissed because I knew she could do better than that, which is probably what sparked the outburst when she was knocked down. I appeared on a roof closer to the fighting ground-the yard of the fortress, in other words.

"Come on! You've hit me harder than that! Get up!" I shouted, as Varia backed away and recomposed. Sepaaru swam around on the ground, looking for her sword and shield. "You've put in too much work to get beat without landing a punch, now get the hell up!"

I know, I know. I suck as a motivational coach.

She stands up then, puts her weight on her back leg, and looks up at me.

"Yeah, now don't look at me! Look at her and kick her ass!" I shouted, as she nodded and went back to the basic footwork.

Varia sauntered in with that Gerudo swagger, and was caught looking with a jab. Did I mention I'm a loud person when there's physical violence going on around me? Well, I am. She was stunned, but not out of it. Sepaaru deflected the roundhouse with her shield, slightly throwing her sister off balance. Man, you should've heard her shield clang when she backhanded Varia with it. Not to be outdone, Varia chanced a wild twirl with her scimitars as she fell. Sepaaru took a lash across her thigh, dropping back to recover.

"That's nothing! Shake it off!" I screamed, as Varia rolled and vaulted back to her feet. Forgoing the formalities, she charged and put her fist in Sepaaru's gut up to the wrist. She gagged, as Varia smashed her across the back of the head with the hilts of her swords. "Goddamn it!" I was stomping like a little kid when I saw that. For a long while, Sepaaru was just victimized-but she wouldn't give up. This was it, I thought, as Varia roundhouse kicked her in the face for the umpteenth time. It lifted Sepaaru off the ground, twisted her in the air, and I closed my eyes before her body landed with a muffled thud.

"Give it up little sister," Varia said, with a cynical pity in her voice as her sister shakily stood. "I've just been doing this for far too long to lose now."

"Yah!" Sepaaru shouted it with such clarity, such venom that everybody went quiet. Varia screamed, stunned as Sepaaru lunged. In the next instance, she was picked up by her waist and slammed with a force that made me wince. Sepaaru went for the stomp, but Varia used her swords to repel her foot, which made Sepaaru fall. She hit the ground rolling and before Varia got to her feet completely… WHAM! Right hand to the temple and she dropped like a dead cow. Sepaaru had gotten to hers, covered the small gap, and stretched her sister out with one of the most devastating punches I've ever seen.

"Yeees! I told you! I told you all!" I'm the quietest winner around, if you consider quiet unnecessary shouting. "Your winner and new captain of the guards, Sepaaru!"

I don't want to recall, but I sounded her name out like: "SEH-PAH-ROO."

Ugh, anyway, I was all excited and unconsciously warped the wife and me down with the others. After all the withheld encouraging words, I was a fountain of compliments then. Sepaaru took them in stride, but you could tell that she was happy to receive them. Varia eventually woke up, muttering about a sucker punch and how I distracted her. Whatever, she could've saw that punch coming and it still would've flattened her ass.

There was a small ceremony of sorts where there was the passing of this gold armband. It was comprised of two snakes, which wasn't shocking considering that it was a sacred animal of sorts. Also, it had been their mother's. Even in my gloating, I wasn't so jaded as to include my idiocy into an area of such emotional depth. Here's where it gets weird. The sisters hug… no, not yet. They hug, thus proving they've moved beyond the past in that respect. Now, it gets weird.

"In winning this title, you may ask for one thing, anything. If it is within doable means, it shall be yours," Nabooru says regally.

Hell, I was so proud that her work paid off until I was up for anything… almost.

Sepaaru mulled over it for all of three seconds and said, "I want you for a day." She pointed at me, as she said it with such innocence that it seemed harmless.

I knew Nabooru was going to say no at any second, so I stalled. I mean, I couldn't say no-that would seem very mean on my part. Of course, being spineless has done me a lot more harm than good this time around.

"What do you want me for?" I asked, completely missing the obvious.

Any second now, Nabooru would say no, I kept telling myself.

"You'll see, that is, if this is within doable means," Sepaaru answers with an aloofness that didn't make me suspect anything, other than the sideways glance at my wife.

"Sure you don't want money or something?" I asked, still waiting for Nab to interrupt.

"Yep, just you," Sepaaru said in much the same distant, yet fully aware, manner. "And you have to do whatever I say."

"Of course," I enter the agreement knowing that Nabooru is going to step in for sure now. "That is if she lets me." I finally said, because Nabooru seemed to be completely oblivious to answering no for me.

I have a five-year-old son, what do you think happens?

"Agreed," my wife finally says on my behalf.

"Dinner is on me then, I guess." I'm saying this a little stunned, but with nothing in mind other than food and talking. Then I catch the look between them. Then I slip up, and my mind does a little digging. Uh, oh. The thought rushed out of Sepaaru's head so fast until it nearly knocked the wind out of me. I pulled Nabooru to the side, as the 'girl' left to go clean herself up, and told her.

"We gotta stop this. She… she wants to sleep with me!"

"I know," she says, this time actually knocking the wind from my lungs. My mouth was open wide enough to see my stomach, so she elaborated. "Normally, I wouldn't agree to something like this, but this is a special case. She's so apprehensive towards ever seeking a lover or making love until this seems like the right course of action."

So much for that feeling loved thing, huh?

"What the hell is right about this?" I shouted in a whisper, wondering if Nabooru had been placed under a spell.

"Sssh!" she scolds, indicating that I should keep my voice further down. "She isn't afraid of you. More so, she just wants you to take her into womanhood. I told her how gentle you were with me, and I think you can provide that for her."

Insert Link's Blank Stare of Disbelief and you have my response to a T.

"Do you tell them everything we do in our bedroom?" I had to know, because frankly, this was getting out of hand.

"No," she says, giving me a flighty type of look.

"Whatever, but why don't you just let her find somebody else? I'm not the only man in Hyrule who's familiar with the term gentle, you know." Then I said, "How can you even ask me to do this? I think of her like my daughter, and now you want me to just break her in like a pair of boots."

"I don't want you to break her in," Nabooru says indignantly. "She presented this to me as a mother with the means to help her child. Sepaaru's always seen you as more of a friend, anyway. Now, are you really seeing her as a daughter or are you seeing this as having to fuck one of Ganondorf's creations?"

"That was low," I told her, narrowing my eyes in defensiveness. "I'm seeing this as my wife telling me to fuck another woman, a woman that I see as a child. I'm seeing this as a small sign that I'm either boring the hell out of you in bed or you want to leave me for someone else and this is the excuse to do it by. Her being… Ganondorf's daughter doesn't have a position in this."

I was lying out of my ass. Oh, I was lying out of my ass. Nonetheless, I started to suspect her (Nabooru's) feelings for me. Now, I know what you're thinking: "This is the perfect excuse to sleep around." Well, consider this for a moment: My wife wasn't that sexually open. Sure, if it were back in the days with Zelda, this wouldn't have been a shock. She was a… what's the term, nymphomaniac? So, she used to get depressed when we'd go for too long and too hard, and then she couldn't perform the next night. Heh, I remember one time, Zelda had paid this barmaid to sleep with me because she thought I was upset that she was sore. I refused, but at our rate of sexual escapades, the subject came up a lot. Nabooru, on the other hand, seemed a bit possessive about me. I don't mind, in fact, I liked it. And for her to suggest that I go out and bang someone else (Ganondorf's daughter no less) it made me a feel a tad unwanted.

Back then, it went like this…

"Then you tell her no," she says, having had enough of the arguing for once. "I've sat up with her crying for too many nights about this subject to do that to her."

I would've fired back with the old, "What if she falls in love with me" line, but I secretly knew that wasn't the case. You see I've known since the beginning-rather, I've had a gut feeling and knew later-that Sepaaru's hated me with a passion. The only reason she wanted to learn from me was to learn my moves and kill me with them. Even her killing Ganondorf was an attempt to throw me off the trail, which it did. But still, I could feel that hate for me there in her heart. I'd killed her father and she'd kill me for it. That's probably why I found it so easy to hate her back and torture her as intensely as I did. Of course, it still didn't change the fact that my feelings were still more parental towards her than anything.

I caught up with Nabooru, had some more words, and ended with, "I'll tell her, but this is your fault for telling her that I'd agree to something like this."

"Oh, so this is my fault? It's my fault you're so naïve as to think you could be a father to the girl who's real father you killed?" She knew I was defenseless and went for the heart. "You killed her father, Hero. No matter how nice you are to her, she's not going to forget that. And as sad as it is for me to tell you this, you'll never replace him in her heart. I know your heart won't be in this, but neither is hers. This is just an ends to a mean, and I honestly don't mind sharing that end of you, just so long as this end is reserved for me."

She puts her hand over my heart, and I was officially beaten. Still, I was determined not to go through with this. I couldn't tell her that, but I'd damn sure tell Sepaaru.

Again, I have a sixty-pound, five-year-old son who's asleep on my back.

Later that night the twenty-four-hour timer started. Sepaaru showed up in virginal white for our evening, which reminded me of the first time I met Nabooru. No, the real first time I met her. So, by way of the Hyrule Carriage Service, we make our way to the Hylian Reservoir-a restaurant and inn-the most expensive restaurant in Hyrule. Sepaaru suggested (demanded) we go there, which I was bound to do by the more decent half of the agreement.

Usually, I could find something to ramble on about, but not then. I took the silent time of our trip to roam around her brain for a minute. Uh, oh. This is where I find out that, that once veiled hatred towards me isn't there. How long had it been gone? She didn't know, so I didn't know. Man, I was in it deep. There was no love-not that I could actually pinpoint that emotion back then-but Sepaaru was far from plotting to kill me.

We pulled up in front of the building and I just let it all fly.

"You know I can't sleep with you."

"I know," she replies, which transcends into, "But you did promise to do whatever I wanted for twenty-four hours."

"No way," I hear the driver think. "If I was him, I'd be on her like grass on dirt. Look at those tits! Come on, is this guy insane? Mmmm, I could just see her bent over a…"

"That's enough, I get the point!" I screamed, throwing a pouch of rupees at him. He blinked, but snapped the reigns and trotted off to the stables. "Like I was saying…" I paused. That brief eavesdrop into his mind seemed to awaken the purely superficial male within myself.

Suddenly, I began to take an exaggerated look at my surroundings. True enough, she'd never had sex before, but her gene pool obviously scripted for her to be tall. Not quite as tall as Nabooru, but Sepaaru was considerably taller and more curvy than that sixteen-year-old stick figure that I'd met for the first time that night in the desert. I blinked a few times to take the 'dick' out of my thinking process. I would just ignore those… breasts. When did she get those? I could ignore those… hips? Where did they come from? Uh, it then dawned on me that I'd been talking to her chest earlier. It wasn't intentional, I just remembered that's where her eyes were… eight years ago.

"See something or things you like?" Her voice was low, nearly sexual. I looked up at her, barely stifling the urge to shudder. I hadn't even made it inside the restaurant and I was already headed down the wrong path.

"Like… Like I was saying," I coughed nervously. "I can appreciate that you'd want me to be your first, but I'm married and this just isn't right." I almost felt like I was quoting that out of a Hero's Guidebook to Ethical Decisions. No, I'm serious, the last great hero of Hyrule wrote it, and it was chock full of cheesy sayings like that.

"So? Nabooru said you could," Sepaaru states in her defense.

"Yeah, but how would you feel if your husband told you to go sleep with someone else?"

"If I ever get a husband," she mumbled, looking away from me for a moment. "I wouldn't mind. I'd think it was a very selfless act to allow me to indulge one of my… curiosities."

I wasn't buying that.

"Really? So, in my place, you wouldn't feel the slightest bit objectified or insignificant?" She didn't have a counter, yet. "You wouldn't feel as though he-or she in my case-didn't think of your intimate affairs as intimacy, but more so, something for the commonwealth to share like a chair?"

After a handful of minutes passed, Sepaaru finally answers the question.

"No," she says with certainty. "I would think of it as him realizing that it's my body, and I'm only sharing it physically. I would think of it as him trusting me to share only my body, but not my heart. In other words, I would think of it as my husband trusting me to have sex, not make love."

I really loathed the fact that my intelligence had started rubbing off on her. Back in front of the inn, I'm standing there performing my vacant brain act when Sepaaru pulls a Nabooru.

"You said there was a difference between sex and making love," Sepaaru begins, women's intuition probably sensing my weakness or confusion. "Well, I just want sex. You can keep all of the feelings and mushy stuff, because I'll find a man of my own for that someday. I just want you to… I guess, break me in."

Weird choice of words, huh?

I stood there dueling against opposite emotions. There's something inside of me that longs and likes to be wanted or desired. I like that feeling, possibly too much so, in fact. On the other side of that feeling, though, is my sense of decency. I may not be a sage, but I still have some morals, I'd like to believe. One of those morals, I thought, was my ability to remain faithful. My wife is faithful to me, so I make doubly sure that I am the same to her. But then, wasn't I unfaithful if I slept with Sepaaru? Or was I still faithful because this was a specific request from Nabooru?

Before I arrived at an answer, this happens…

"Ah, Link!" the innkeeper shouts, as he flings the door open. "Did that lazy son of mine lock the door? I'll deal with him, but please, come on in!"

I didn't get a chance to say my piece, as we were ushered inside and the topic was changed. Underneath my calm visage, instead of thinking about what was important, I was wondering when Sepaaru developed such an "I'm ready" attitude. The images from Rampart's brain that night portrayed a very skittish Sepaaru, one who got out of the mood if the floor creaked. Then, for her to actually stand face-to-face with me to say, "I just want sex" was a bit weird. As the night progressed, our conversation skated around from one subject to the other, never really talking about much of anything.

I'd say it was about a few hours later when the real subject came to me again.

"So, you'd hold me to this even when I don't want to do it?" I asked, relatively smoothly in my ears.

Unfortunately, men and women seem to hear two different things out of every spoken line.

"What's your problem with me? Or is it not me, and just who I'm a part of?" Smack! Ganondorf card has been played again, but this time, I can't exactly lie. I didn't answer quickly enough, and she started to get loud. Luckily, it was close to closing time and not many people were there to hear it. "So it is him! Out of all of your bullshit, I really didn't expect you of all people to still see me like that."

"It's not you… or him exactly," I was struggling for words and it showed. "It's me."

"Oh," Sepaaru says in kind, as she reclines back into her chair. "So, you're afraid you'll like it."

It wasn't a question.

Here's the part in the story where, yep, you guessed it-Link's lower jaw unhinges, hands begin to sweat, and worst of all, she knew it. I had never entertained that question. What if I did like it? Honestly, I've never had sex or made love and not liked it. So, what becomes of things if I become addicted to Sepaaru?

I frowned and said the only thing I could think of next.

"And what's to say you wouldn't?"

You know, even when I asked that I could feel, actually feel the stupidity in that question.

"I wouldn't have asked if I thought I wouldn't like it," she says, obviously enjoying this little exchange, as witnessed by her smirk.

Secretly, I was back in the trenches of want and loyalty. I was starting to warm up to the idea of mindless sex, as that was something I never had before. Sure, there were those days with Nabooru, but there was still love involved. This was a chance to just have some loveless fun. Okay, so I was slowly but surely altering my vision of her to that of my wife. It worked as long as I didn't look her in the eyes. When I did that that is when the regret, fear, loathing, and apprehension began. Those red eyes-they were just so far from the norm until I'd know it was Sepaaru every time. We stared at each for at least fifteen minutes-though, it was only fourteen and thirty-four seconds-before I made my choice.

"No strings," I said to her, swallowing my concerns as Mr. Ganji took our plates away. "This happens once, but never again. I don't care what it is, never put me in this position again."

"Aren't we con…" I interrupted with, "Yes or no?"

She takes my hands and stands up.

"Yes."

I paid for our food and a room, which makes this all the seedier. The fancier rooms were all booked, so we took a standard. Things went downhill from here. First of all, I'm a lousy screw. No, not like that, but in the sense that I looked at her earlier confidence as experience; this wasn't the case. I approached her like I would Nabooru-which is kinda like a sudden pouncing-and she froze, nearly pushing me to the floor. The fear had never left, I realized. The bravado she showed had been easy out there, but when the door shut and it came time to act on it, she was deathly afraid. Those fears that Rampart had instilled mixed with those she had going in were still there and Sepaaru hated that.

"I guess this is it then," she said, giving one of those bitter laughs as she plopped down on the edge of the bed. "If I can't have sex with you…" Sepaaru stopped short, screaming in frustration as I stood there, blinking. There were conflicting stories, I realized. Ganondorf had explained a lot of his 'behavior' with the women as things all women experience. Those women later spoke of the pain involved of being forced to have sex when they weren't ready-physically or emotionally.

So, whom do you believe? Your father said they weren't forced, sex isn't painful, and they scream because they like it. (I even told her people don't always scream because they're in pain.) The women said it's the worst pain they've ever known. And to sweeten the confused pot, you have memories of their tear-streaked faces and their sad eyes. She didn't like it when Rampart tried to force himself on her, but that went against what her father said. However, it agreed with what her peers said. How do you know who's telling the truth and who's lying? Sepaaru didn't know, which made me feel bad for her. She would never know unless someone showed her, because her mindset left her stuck in the abstinent middle.

I had enough of the feelings and thoughts that she was radiating and decided to be that someone.

This, of course, meant that I'd have to put some actual thought into what I was about to do. I had to be genuine about this, have some feelings about the current situation, or she'd be stuck with those questions for the rest of her life. So, with a precision reserved for my wife, I took to my knees in front of this sobbing woman, and kissed her. It was slow at first and soft enough to make her wonder if I was truly there. When I pulled away her eyes were popped and a flush had crept into those bronze cheeks.

"It gets better, if you'd like," I whispered, to no response.

Sepaaru made something close to a gasp as I grazed my teeth over her neck.

"I-I-I-I-I… I like. I mean I'd like. No, I meant…" I kissed her again, as that domineering side of me liked her helplessness. You'd think a guy who doesn't enjoy ruling people wouldn't be keen on dominating or being in control, but you'd be wrong. I get some kind of rush out of it when I'm between the sheets-this time was no different.

"Good," I said, kissing her again. "I'll just go slow, okay?"

She nodded her skull right into mine before moaning in pain and embarrassment.

I eased her back onto the bed before those feelings could stick, moving at a quarter of the speed that I'd usually use, and keeping her occupied with my lips. Sepaaru shrieked as my hand found her right breast. I paused, giving her a re-assuring look, and letting her adjust to the feeling, as I waited for a sign to continue. She moved against my palm, and I let my hand play. I sneaked my right hand between us, undoing the clasp on her top in a mere flick. Sepaaru shrieked again, moving her hands to cover positions.

"Wait!" she said, albeit still pinned beneath me.

"Why? I like what I saw," I said, as my inhibitions retreated deeper into my mind. "What I can still see."

"Rampart used to say they were too small," Sepaaru whispered, turning her head slightly, as she realized I could see through her hands.

"Nonsense, they're perfect," I whispered in turn, returning my mouth to hers for a brief moment. "Now, move your hands." I commanded softly, getting an even bigger… head when she followed through. Her skin was slowly beginning to sweat as I kissed away from her neck down to her chest, then as expected, she screamed as my lips closed around her nipple. "Do you want me to stop?" I asked, breathing deeply against the moistened nub.

"No!" Sepaaru answered immediately, still refusing to touch me in any way. "I… I… Your tunic is just itchy."

I smiled, saying, "Then take it off."

Her eyes snapped even further open, trying to stutter a refusal, but I wouldn't hear it. I took her hands and placed them on the strings by my chest, walking her through the motions of untying them. She was bold enough to try to take it off me, but the belt was hindering that progress.

"The belt," I said, refusing to guide her through this action. "Take it off."

This was becoming fun for me, I'll admit. It's not that I get my jollies running around collecting virginity, which I don't. It's just that abundance of control, I think. Someone relying solely on me to get by in a situation and willing to take everything I do as the most grandiose of things. Sad, isn't it?

Where was I? Oh, yeah, Sepaaru is shaking like something off Death Mountain when it's erupting, when she finally gets the belt off me. I shed the tunic and undershirt with ease, genuinely surprised that she looked so stunned or rather, appreciatively at my naked torso (something she's seen before). At that time, however, I resumed my plodding course of foreplay. Unlacing her leather forearm pieces exposed more lovely skin, which I kissed as softly as I did her breasts. Then I removed her shoes, tickling each foot with my tongue. I waited (about four minutes) for her permission, then I removed her pants-kissing and licking, nibbling and caressing every piece of available skin-the girl didn't know whether she was coming or going.

Literally, she didn't know whether she was coming.

I'd managed to get her completely undressed and let my tongue do the talking between her legs, when she stopped me.

"I… Link! S-s-something's happening," Sepaaru said, panting openly at these new sensations.

It was then that I realized that she'd never had an orgasm. Oh, I'm a sick, sick man. I smiled like a sexually depraved lunatic, as I decided to have some fun with her, then.

"I see," I said with a clinical attitude. "Is it a painful something?"

"No… it's just… I'm just," she struggled cutely to put words to the feeling. "I feel all tingly. Is… that supposed to happen?"

"I'll let you decide," I told her. "Now, lay back and just go with it."

Her head fell back into the blue covers, moaning desperately as my tongue began to lull her clitoris in a rhythm that'd been honed to an art form. Sepaaru unconsciously began to pull her hair, saying my favorite three words, "Oh, god! Link! God! Oh, Link!" I smiled, completely lost in the moment. In my mind, the day began with my tongue penetrating her and that day ended with her moaning my name. Finally, it happened. Sepaaru grabbed two fistfuls of my hair, arched until she was off the bed, and had her first orgasm.

"Link!" she shouted, shrilling incessantly for two whole minutes. I allowed the pace of my tongue to slow, occasionally increasing the speed to make her squeak my name between the shudders.

Odd how all it takes is one of my perverse enjoyments to make me completely dismiss my morals.

"Good tingly or bad tingly?" I asked afterwards, finally getting off my knees and shedding my boots. For a moment, as Sepaaru lie there with her eyes closed and smiling, I thought that she was Nabooru. Her muscles were more pronounced, not in the bulky sense, but just more defined from the work. Even that I could overlook to imagine that it was my wife's prone body, but on all fronts, I knew that it wasn't her. Add to my perversion either more, I got this sick obsession with making her scream. Not in the bad way, but Sepaaru was trying hard not to scream the whole while I was down there. I suppose that wasn't the right time to get competitive.

In the Room of Infidelity…

"Good… tingly!" Sepaaru finally says, very chipper through the heavy panting.

She rolled around for a moment before her eyes slowly opened-red not gold eyes were looking back at me. I was too aroused to care at that point. There was a naked woman in front of me. Her body was glistening in the candlelight with sweat. Her body held similar dimensions to the woman I had originally made love to in that desert several years ago. This body began to crawl towards the edge of the bed. And that body slowly began to rub its hand across my crotch.

"I have to repay you… I don't know if I can, but I have to try." Sepaaru told me, lust fueling the boldness in her touch.

I wish I could say this ruined the entire experience and made me wake up from my perverse actions, but it didn't. In much the way I started with her, Sepaaru pulled my tights down slowly. The smirk, no, the sneer on her face twisted into a rather depraved smile of lunacy. (Notice how we both became lunatics at points?) Without a second thought, Sepaaru plunged as much of me into her mouth as she could get. And what she couldn't fit in her mouth, she tried to fit into her throat. Eagerness aside, I had to step in or Sepaaru was going to hurt herself… as weird as it sounds.

"Easy, easy," I whispered while ignoring how erotic I found her face crammed with my dick. "We still have time, so you don't have to rush."

Sepaaru backed off for a moment, took a deep breath, and started over. It was intense to say the least. She moved with a familiarity that proved Rampart's blurb correct. Nabooru was good in the beginning, but if I didn't know the truth, Sepaaru would've been considered amazing. The way her tongue guarded the underside of my shaft to protect it from her teeth, up to the way she traced each of my veins, on down to the way she held my balls-Sepaaru had skill in this craft. It took a great deal of restraint to keep my hands to my sides, and not just fuck her face, but I rubbed her cheeks ever so often to express how good she was making me feel.

"Mmmm," I let slip as I looked down at her. Sepaaru sped up again, but without the reckless abandon. She was going for the gusto, if you will. I stood there, watching her, and listening to her mantra to make me feel just as good as I had made her feel earlier. I grunted, as Sepaaru began to suck that much harder. She responded eagerly to my every noise, eventually taking a hold of my butt, a cheek in either hand, and began to thrust her face on me. I growled, gritting my teeth to keep the orgasm off me, but I was clearly losing. Sure, I could make myself devoid of any physical feelings, but what was the point? I went with it, and so did Sepaaru. "Ah!"

"Such a short sound for such an intense feeling."I thought at the time, being drained by this woman. I could feel her jaws flaring and collapsing around me, pumping more of my seed into her mouth by the ecstasy-driven minute. I felt lightheaded, finally loosening my muscles enough to look down at her.

*Gulp*

I raised my right eyebrow when I heard that, surprised that Sepaaru had held it in for so long. She smiled shyly, stood up, and waited for me to take over again, as that's where her experience ended.

"You taste… different," Sepaaru said, catching me by surprise. It didn't throw me off my game any, but it was an interesting pre-sex thing to say.

Being the guy that I am, I said, "So do you."

I kissed her to test her nerves. There were some preliminary jitters, but she quickly calmed down. We hit the bed with a light thud, causing the rusty springs to cringe under the strain. This was it, the moment of penetrating truth. Sepaaru hesitantly parted her legs to allow me a spot between them, which I humbly accepted. She took a deep breath and nodded when for me to go.

I took one last glance into those eyes-those red eyes of a woman who wasn't my child-and slid in. She sucked in a mouthful of air as I pressed onward through her hymen. Shortly after, Sepaaru's eyes shut tightly as the pain tore through her. I hate that part. No matter what I do before, that painful sensation always sneaks in and ruins everything… almost.

"Nabooru's going to kick my ass for this," I muttered, placing my hand on her stomach. The light shone briefly, as Sepaaru opened her eyes and looked around in confusion.

"Was that so bad?" I asked.

"No," Sepaaru answered, surprisingly guilty. "And if that was the big pain everyone's so worked up about, I'm sorry I got you involved. I mean, I just thought having you here wouldn't make it hurt so much. I didn't think it was three seconds then nothing…" she continued to apologize, never realizing that I'd interfered.

"Sssh," I said, placing my lips over her continuously moving ones until they stopped. "It's too late to be guilty, now. No strings, remember?"

Sepaaru nodded, looking flustered and relieved with my desire to continue.

"So, just lay back and try to enjoy it." With those whispered words, I brought my body in harmony with hers, and we didn't stop.

Hour after hour, minute after minute, and second after intense second-we fucked. We had sex. We made love. I made love to someone who wasn't my wife. I brought another woman to orgasm and reveled in her screaming my name at her peak. I brought another woman to orgasm with a smile on my face and iron in my dick. I was bringing Ganondorf's daughter to the brink of insanity with little more than my mouth and my cock-and I didn't care. I knew it wasn't Nabooru, but I didn't care. I couldn't care. I wanted to care, I really did! But I just… couldn't. The only thing I cared about was not hurting her, as she couldn't quite accommodate my girth completely inside of her-another footnote that made me aware that she wasn't Nabooru.

Sepaaru stared up at me, eyes rolling back into her head ever so often, and whispered, "Thank you."

I didn't respond. I just thrust further into that wet valley between her thighs, coasting on the absolute zenith of sexual intercourse. I know, but what most people enjoy about sex, I also enjoy in watching my lover's expressions. I, in a sense, get off on the rush of giving pleasure. I can't explain it really. But the way Nabooru, Sepaaru, and even back at Zelda, the way they looked at that point between orgasm and vegetable just does it for me. I can remember each of their faces clearly-the red in Zelda's cheeks, the sinister smirk on Nabooru, and the way Sepaaru's right eye rolled back into her head. And when I notice that, I seem to leave the situation in conscious mind. It becomes a thing where I want to keep that look on their face at any and all costs, which makes me give it to them harder and faster-like with Sepaaru.

"Ah… ah… Link!"

"Yes!" I seemed to respond to the words, but it was more to the look of utter euphoria on her face.

Faster! Harder! I began to plow into her mercilessly, as my senses all tingled to the nth with each facial contortion or shouting of my name. I couldn't stop if the world depended on it, sadly. It felt too good! No, it was better than good. It transcended that word and moved to a place where it spoke only to my instincts as a man. Conquer, destroy, claim this pussy as yours-and I did, too. The bed had long since pounded into the wall, but I didn't give a damn. I barely recognized that the sun had risen, by then Sepaaru had her legs on my shoulders and her nails in my back. I could hear my heart beating like that of a horse in full gallop, but it only added more fuel. Then… the moment was upon me. I threw my head back and yelled, forgetting who she was and cramming the rest of myself between her legs and just held it there.

"Aaaah… Uuuuh!" I groaned, as the tension in my balls was released in a current of sperm. Sepaaru screamed my name, as the last in a series of orgasms made her insides squeeze me for everything she was worth. The hidden agenda to avoid this situation had failed. The hidden agenda to avoid orgasm had failed. The hidden agenda to enjoy this as little as possible… heh, that failed on every level. I didn't think it would feel that good outside of Nabooru, literally and figuratively, but it had. In the back of my mind, I thought I had gone through her hymen again, but I was too tired to think about that. I withdrew with a shudder, nearly collapsing, but quickly recovering.

"L…ink," Sepaaru whispered, falling into a serene sleep, as I'd exhausted her in to a slight coma.

By the time she made a soft snore, I was back to normal, and starting to put this in some form of perspective. Sepaaru slept for the next twelve hours, which put us two short of twenty-four. By then, I was in full on, "What have I done" mode. I was barely brought out of that when I heard the sounds of breaking bones, which meant one thing: Sepaaru had just experienced her "change." The intrigue in that quickly wore off, ending officially once I remembered that's how it was supposed to happen. They were supposed to be in a state of deep sleep to avoid the pain in it all. Sepaaru wakes up eventually and I'm still sitting on the edge of the bed, naked to the toes.

"Mmmm, how's my favorite king?" I nearly jumped out of my skin, as her voice sounded exactly like Nabooru's. "What'd I say?"

It wasn't my ears, though. This metamorphosis, if you will, made her sound exactly like my wife. Ugh, the headache was intense. But I managed to work with it.

"Nothing, you just startled me," I mumbled, not bothering to face her. "You should probably learn how to walk again. Congratulations… I guess."

She slowly gets out of the bed, still a bit rubber-kneed, and casually walks around. Apparently, the Gerudo sense of balance is refitted during their naptime. Whatever the case, I was still mulling over this and contemplating speeding the last couple of hours up to get beyond the anxiety, when Sepaaru straddles my lap.

"Thank you," she says, switching into her bravado mode again. I force the feelings down, ignoring the little kisses she leaves on my neck, and damn near biting a hole in my lip to ignore how great her breasts felt against my chest. "Thank you for making me a real woman."

"Yes, well, you're welcome," I replied, noticing how much her breasts had grown and how much she really looked like Nabooru. Then I looked up into those eyes, those red eyes, and I felt my body responding again. No, once was enough. Once was enough. Once was… enough. On…e more time won't hurt. She still had a couple of hours before her time was up, so if I was quick with it… no!

"Oh!" She quipped, as my erection formed and poked at her. "Seems as though you'd like seconds."

I threw her to the floor… to get away. I didn't mean to be so forceful, but I couldn't do it again. I wouldn't. One time and that was it. A second would only compound those feelings, whatever they were twisting into, and I didn't need that. Of course, this forceful rejection struck a cord with Sepaaru. She lay on the floor in a heap, looking up at me with hurt in her eyes that made me feel compelled to explain.

"I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable," she began. "I just thought maybe… you'd like to… do it again."

I sighed, as I helped her get up.

"I know," I said, trying to think of a way to phrase my problems without hurting her. Sepaaru's borderline sexual awareness and sexual naivete made this a difficult task, however.

"Then why not?" I swear it came off as such a childish whine that I almost paid it no mind, but then I looked into those eyes, those damn red eyes, and felt indebted to explain.

"I don't want you to become too attached." I fell back on honesty at that point. "No matter what happens after this point-not to brag-but you'll always remember this. You'll see me day in and day out, kissing someone that isn't you, and it'll be weird, at first. But if we keep this a one-time thing, the blow will be lessened… for both of us." Her attention peaked then, feeling a small piece of confidence surge at the idea that it may be difficult for me as well.

"Why? It wasn't like we made love or anything-it was just sex," Sepaaru said, though, obviously conflicted about whether it was that cut-and-dry.

"Did you go through the trouble of taking a three-hour bath to just have sex?" I asked, before asking another. "Did you willingly give up the most precious gift you owned for a roll in the hay or was there more to it then that?"

I didn't take my eyes off her, because I wanted to hear that this was just sex. I hadn't made love to this foreign woman; I just stuck it in, wiggled it around a bit, and that was that.

"I… I don't know," she confessed after awhile. "I thought it was sex. But then, it… felt… it seemed like more. I wanted to be clean for you, but I also didn't want to offend you by stinking like some kind of animal. Then here… we… I never felt anything like that… and I stopped… wanting to just lose my virginity. I wanted to… please you… I needed to please you… I liked pleasing you."

I let her stop a bit later, as Sepaaru looked poised to fall through the floor while she spoke through the awkward pauses.

"That's what I'm talking about," I said in my voice of 'ageless wisdom'. "If we laid down together again, the confusion would only mount and the lines would further blur. Then there's the creepy fact that I thought of you as my daughter and managed to sleep with you anyway, which disturbs me. We need to just cut our losses here and move on with our lives. You'll meet someone your own age, and I'll still be the king in green with the queen."

"Nice rhyme," she said with a smile, making an attempt at humor. I missed the joke. "I guess this means calling you 'daddy' is out of the question then."

I shuddered at the thought, but I got the joke that time.

"Not after the thing you did with your tongue, no," I told her, seeking out my clothes. What I found slightly amusing was the fact that I didn't realize what I'd said until I saw her standing in the same position with the goofiest smile I'd ever seen. "See what I mean? Awkward pause and a weird feeling of what's next, right?" I gave up on the tights, summoning a fresh set of clothes for us both.

"Well, kinda," Sepaaru said around the smile. "Did you mean what you said earlier?"

I asked about what and she informed me.

"About both of us-did this… mean something more to you?"

"Yes," I answered without reservation. "It probably wouldn't have meant anything had you done that before, but to desire your first time to be with me-a guy who's probably the biggest source of misery in your life-made it mean something more to me." More of that Link brand honesty, you just can't beat it with a stick.

"I wanted to kill you for that," Sepaaru admitted suddenly, finding that her words came easier on this particular subject. "While they all celebrated and Nabooru touted you as some kind of god, I sat in my room and plotted to kill you. Before I knew who you were that night we first met, I was practicing. You, the bum in the cloak, would be my first kill to get the nerve under me. And in a handful of moves-after taking my most powerful attacks-you beat me. Before Nabooru told me who you were, I simply told myself that I needed more training since you let me live. Afterwards, I considered myself lucky to be alive. For that initial time that you were among us, I watched you… studied you."

"And decided that you couldn't beat me on your own," I added, as she paused for breath. Those eyes, those goddamn red eyes were nearly glowing with anger as they looked at me, which brought the same emotion to the surface in me. Nonetheless, I continued. "You suddenly realized something, though. I wasn't a monster-not in the classical sense of the word-but a guy with an affinity for green, who when provoked, could disembowel. Still, your feelings weren't as clear anymore. I'd stolen your only family, and there you sat, laughing at my corny jokes."

Sepaaru took over from there, finishing out with: "I tried to keep hating you. But away from that track, you didn't give me a reason to. I could only keep the hate in my heart out there, because then it was worthwhile. I could honest-to-goodness knock the piss out of you. Out there is how it should've been all of the time. I hated you in battle, but… I… liked you beyond that. We were supposed to battle to the death, and I was supposed to win. I never did, and you never killed me. After all of that time, I couldn't do it anymore. As long as we squared off, I'd always remember what you were forced to do and I'd hate you for it. So, I slowly retired from your tutelage and took the skills you gave me and built on them at night, alone. This past year was just done to spend time with you, because to be frank, I missed our back-and-forth sniping."

Let me tell you, I was relieved when she said that. The way she was looking at me around the end, you could almost hear the, "I did it because I loved you," roll off her tongue-thankfully, the ball didn't roll that way.

"I guess it was a little silly of me to assume you'd let something like that go and just fall into line as being my kid," I concurred.

Sepaaru nodded, adding that, "I didn't mean to really give you the impression that I regarded you as a father. And I'm sorry that you thought I did." I told her it was fine and she adds, "I thank you for giving me my first mother, though. I never thought Nabooru would accept me in such a way, but I'm thankful that she has. And as so, I promise I will not disrupt your lives any further."

So says the lady who spit a nine-pound baby boy out nine months later.

Back then, the tension in the situation left us at a comfortable crossroad. A few jokes about her not being able to wear white, a joke or two about me being the King of Virginity Thieves, and we were headed home. I can honestly tell you that I never thought about the sex until we came back to the fortress an hour late due to the Bombachu Racing. Nabooru claimed that she was out for a stroll, but I know her better than that. I waited for the pins and needles worth of angered feelings to start pouring out of her, but it never happened. We just hugged and watched the sunset… then fucked like rabbits. I know she was trying to make me know who the better of the two were, but I didn't make weight of it.

And true to her word, Sepaaru never did intrude or interfere in our personal lives… not even when she discovered her pregnancy some two months later.

I'll tell you more tomorrow, as I see a collective of very angry faces on the other side of the bridge. Why am I not surprised being brought back from the dead didn't satiate them?

Author's Notes: To have the Gerudo organize a lethal strike on the Sheikah or not to have the Gerudo organize a lethal strike on the Sheikah, that is the question. (The answer is, of course, not.)