Loveless Fan Fiction ❯ To Love and To Be Loved ❯ My Soul's Imaginary Sight ( Chapter 5 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Sleep Remedy 
Ritsuka has a prophetic dream.
(new chapter added 12/8/2010)
Anime/Manga: Loveless Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Psychological / Occult / Hentai / Drama / Angst | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 11.05.2006 | Updated On: 12.08.2010 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.1K | Visits: 492 | Status: Work In Progress
Ritsuka has a prophetic dream.
(new chapter added 12/8/2010)
Anime/Manga: Loveless Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Psychological / Occult / Hentai / Drama / Angst | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 11.05.2006 | Updated On: 12.08.2010 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.1K | Visits: 492 | Status: Work In Progress
'Weary with toil, I haste me to bed,
The dear repose for limbs with traveling tired,
But then begins a journey in my head
To work my mind when body's work's expired;
For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,
Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,
And keep my drooping eyelids open wide,
Looking on darkness which the blind do see;
Save that my soul's imaginary sight
Presents thy shadow to my sightless view,
Which like a jewel hung in ghastly night,
Makes black night beauteous and her old face new.
Lo, thus, by day my limbs, by night my mind.
For thee, and for myself, no quiet find.'
- Sonnet #26
By Sir William Shakespeare.
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
A soft shimmering sheen of rain fell out of the sky, catching the light of the sun and refracting it back to my eyes in rays of shattered light, appearing to my weary mind a rainbow wrapped in gray drear.
My professor's voice was still droning on, endlessly, but I was only barely there. We were covering Shakespeare again, which I had already completely devoured, inside and out. Confident as I was, in my knowledge of the subject matter, I felt it was alright for me to drift off.
I had skimmed over the sonnets yet again, the night before. This, coupled with the soft spring atmosphere reminded me of him. It was three years ago, around this time of year, that I last saw him, climbing out of my bed room window to return to the strange world to which he belonged. Sometimes, I was able to forget about him for weeks on end. But, other times, times like then, with the shining wet light outside and the lyrical words of love droning inside, it seemed nearly impossible.
- Loveless : Ritsu : 41 -
The house is extremely lonely without Ritsuka. When he is home, a strong, pervasive calm infects the whole house. Unlike other young men his age, he feels no need to go out. Nor, to entertain himself with a fervor when in. He seems like he's in a constant state of preponderance, especially these last few weeks.
You see, currently, Ritsuka has been taking some challenging college level classes at the small, private college at the bottom of the hill. He had long ago proved himself sufficient for graduation from high school. I had meant to prove to him he was not as smart as he insisted and allowed him to take equivalency exams for all of the top level courses that seniors took. Unfortunately, he passed all of them and promptly began coming to school only when he felt the mood over take him. As an educator, I didn't like the idea of him sitting at home and letting his mind to go to rot (even if it happened to be rotting over Bukowski, at the time). Thus, I encouraged him to take further classes. But, they have only made him more distant. He says that the courses there are simply thought provoking and he enjoys them, but I worry. I dislike seeing him become so detached. I'd rather not see him become like myself.
Though I sometimes got down like that, the fact that he had proved to be so intelligent inspired me to dream. "Professor Aoyagi," I muttered beneath my breath. Yes, that sounded wonderful. Besides, perhaps all he needed was such a great status added to the beginning of his name and my students would stop falling all over him. I understand that he is kind and extremely sympathetic to the young Warcraft's plight, but that is no reason for them to try becoming overly friendly with him. He does belong to someone, after all. Not to mention that he is a sacrifice, not to be mingled with Warcrafts all day long.
Slowly rising from my place in front of the laptop, I went to the mantle to examine the three pictures of Ritsuka and myself together. There were two more that was just of each of us separately. Picking up the first one, I saw a formal and uncomfortable Ritsuka, one I did not know very well. It was the picture taken right after we met by my younger sister. She had insisted on it and it was the very first picture with the two of us together, so I had always held onto it. The second one was also not taken very happily. It was some ways into the relationship, about a year ago, after I was done with the secretary and Ritsuka gave my student a little space. There was a storming sky coming in the background, but he was smiling gently, as if to mock the angry clouds behind him. It was a sad smile. I did not like the picture, but I kept it around. As a reminder. Of mistakes made. Finally, there was the third one, my favorite one. We had taken it at Tokyo over the summer, a month ago. Ritsuka was smiling happily, a huge wide smile plastered across his face. I was standing beside him with my arm around his shoulder, an equally uncommon smile on my face. Behind us was Hachiko the dog. For a moment, I entertained taking out the other photos I had of the trip, but decided against it.
After all, Ritsuka would be home soon.
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
/Weary with toil, I haste me to bed,/
/The dear repose for limbs with traveling tired,/
I hated climbing that stupid mountain. If I never had to walk again, I would have been fine. Being struck with paraplegia right then would have been a godsend, I swear it.
As I dragged myself through the front door and took off the outer layer of my rain drenched clothing, I heard Ritsu calling my name from the study.
"Yeah?" I called back, to lazy to actually form a sentence.
He came into the hall, leaning himself against the door frame, and looking me up and down. "You look horrible," he said, nonchalantly.
"Yeah thanks. 'Cause, that's just how I feel..." I grunted out, not feeling like getting into an argument, but also not wanting to put any effort into a retort.
"Come here, let me get you cleaned up," he offered, softening his tone significantly. It made me think again of how much change had happened after both of our supposed affairs and the end to the more violent parts of the relationship. Ritsu did not aggravate me so much after that. I realized, over time, that he was trying to keep me near him. I had not wanted to leave him. However, I do not think he will believe me, no matter how many times I tell him so.
"Are you hungry? I can make you something. I know how tiring lectures can be," he offered. I refused again. I had eaten a little bit between classes, anyway. Not to mention I hadn't had a very big appetite lately.
"That's all right. I'm just tired," I replied.
"I'll help you up to bed, then," he decided, closing the the kitchen door with a kind of finality that suggested that it was not up for my discretion.
With that strength that always surprised me, Ritsu picked me up and carried me up the stairs. His warmth was so kind and inviting that I started to fall asleep while in his arms. He put me on the bed and changed my clothes. He kissed my forehead and turned off the light. I did not last long enough to hear him close the door.
/But then begins a journey in my head/
/For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,/
/Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,/
- Beloved : Soubi : 25 -
It was raining outside and I wished that Ritsuka was with me. It had been raining since the middle of the day and I wished that Ritsuka was there. It started out as nothing more than a mist, but steadily built to a full on downpour and, yes, I wished with all of my being that Ritsuka was beside me.
My paintings had been selling like mad, since Ritsuka was taken from me. Ironically, I'm a much better artist when I'm full of a black despair. The critics were all raving about my characteristic butterflies. I wondered what Ritsuka would say about it. I would have bet anything that they would have gone mad with frustration and elation if they found out that I have a whole room of Violets for Ritsuka. I would never sell the paintings meant for Ritsuka.
Where was Ritsuka? Had he found his Fighter, yet? Was he happy? Was he sad? Is he hurt? Most of all, did he miss me? I thought my life had ended when Seimei left. That was a lie. Though my life had been going on since Ritsuka left, I was not in it. It was no longer my life that I was living. It could not be. I was not living at all. Both of the Aoyagi boys were gone from my life and I found that when both of them left, they tore out the part of my soul I had given to them and took it with them. I do not know if I can forgive them. I would not know that I would ever give either of them the chance to do it again...
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
- Caught In A Dream -
/Looking on darkness which the blind do see;/
/Save that my soul's imaginary sight/
/Presents thy shadow to my sightless view,/
/Which like a jewel hung in ghastly night,/
/Makes black night beauteous and her old face new./
I am running, but not going anywhere. I see the door to freedom from the pain. The pain that the Something that is chasing me promises, but I can not reach it. My legs hurt. My lungs burn. I feel dizzy. I am not going to make it. It is going to catch me. It will not let me escape. Mom!
It has got me.
-...................................................................-
-Ouch. My head hurts. Did She hit me in the head? I think She did. Otherwise, all that red stuff wouldn't be on the floor. Maybe, I'm going to die. I didn't think that death would feel so peaceful. What? I'm not allowed to die? That's mean! You can't do that! How can I possibly live after... -
It has got me. I can not get away! It is going to steal me away and I will not be able to see Him anymore!
-Which Him?-
Either of them! It is going to take me away so I will not be able to see either of the Hims. I do not know if I can take that... I can not do it. It can not make me! Huh?
.------------------------------------------------------.
There is a huge blue butterfly in the sky and it makes me think of the first Him. Meanwhile, It is gone, along with That Boy. It scares me terribly when That Boy comes forth. It just means that I have far less time left than before.
Forgetting my terror of a few moments ago, I chase after the butterfly with reckless abandon. I can feel myself running faster and faster, so that if I fell, I would surely break my legs. Still, I am perfectly set on catching that butterfly, to hold it in my hands for a single beautiful moment, before I let it go free again. I want that butterfly to be free. I only want to be able to brush up against it. That will be enough. That will never be enough.
It has landed now. The butterfly is sitting perilously on the petal of a dark purple violet. If I moved now, I could get it my grasp and never let it go. But, I do not. I hunker down and I just watch as the butterfly examines the flower with it's feelers. I wondered how long it will stay with the flower. Probably not very long. Somehow, that makes me very sad.
Someone sat down beside me, but I did not look up from the butterfly to see who it was.
"Are you going to catch it?" the man asked, and I could hear him smiling.
"No. I just want to watch."
"How come?"
"Well, it's so pretty. It deserves to be free."
"Does being pretty make you free or does it doom you to just the opposite?"
"You're weird. I just don't want to hurt it, because I like it. Is that so confusing?"
"I see. I like you too, Ritsuka."
"Huh?"
Soubi. Blue Butterfly. Soubi. Soubi is sitting beside me, smiling that smile that always suggested that he was just on the verge of bursting into laughter, though I had never seen him actually 'burst' into anything. I could not think or talk. I wanted to hold him and I wanted to run away. Instead, I just said, "Thank you."
~*~*~
I gasped and jolted upright.
"Soubi?" I spoke to the empty darkness of the bedroom. It was still early in the evening and Ritsu had not come to bed, yet. Still working, probably.
I sighed heavily. That had been the first time I had had such a dream like that in a long time. Who had I met in that dream? Someone scary and someone who was scary for another reason... Still, I could not think of who they were. The names did not come. I did remember one person, though. Soubi. Soubi was there and he was a butterfly. Or, was I a flower? I did not know. It was such a weird dream, but it really felt like Soubi was there with me.
"Soubi? Where are you?" I whispered into my hands
'I can't go on like this,' I thought gravely.
/Lo, thus, by day my limbs, by night my mind./
/For thee, and for myself, no quiet find./
- Beloved : Soubi : 25 -
- Waking In A Dream-
I gasped and jolted upright.
"Ritsuka?" I asked the impenetrable darkness. I had seen him. My beautiful Ritsuka covered in deep scars and without ears and tail. My poor Ritsuka torn apart by a cruel world that I could not protect him from. I had seen him closely examining a butterfly sitting precariously on the petal of a deep indigo violet. I had spoken to him and confessed to him just one more time. He had thanked me. Dear God, he had thanked me for saying that I liked him. My Ritsuka?
"Ritsuka? Please, where are you?" I spoke to the darkness.
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
'I can't go on like this,' I thought. 'I have to talk to Soubi, somehow. Get some closure. Otherwise, I'm going to loose it!'
But, to do such I thing, I would have to get in touch with Soubi. Thankfully, I had pretty solid idea of where to find such information on Soubi.
I stole myself silently out of the bedroom. First, I checked to make sure that Ritsu was still working busily in his study. Better yet, he was asleep on the couch. He probably hadn't wanted to wake me up by crawling over me to get into bed. Feeling a little guilty, I had covered him up with the blanket from the back of the couch and went on my way towards Ritsu's study.
That is where I stood, frozen by a deeper guilt, transfixed as I stared at the five pictures standing on the mantelpiece. Beside the one in the middle (the one Ritsu had put up a month ago), there were three new photos in shiny new frames, all of our trip to Tokyo. All of them with the two of us together. All of them with the two or us (or, the one with just me) smiling happily and pointing at some landmark or another.
Pulling myself together, I moved slowly towards the laptop laying closed on the side table beside the one end of the dark leather couch. Taking a seat and pulling the computer onto my lap, I began the search for His address. After but a few minutes of searching, I found it. Right there in Ritsu's address book was Soubi-kun's address. It was there as innocently as my own or his sisters. How did I know that he would have it right there where he could look it up whenever he felt the need? I suppose I am just magical like that.
I ran quickly to the kitchen and came back with a pad of paper and a pencil. However, I stopped just before I wrote down the address, remembering a detective show where the policeman had found his killer by the indents left on the piece of paper beneath. Ritsu would be just so intelligent to pull a move just like that. Half scolding myself for being paranoid, I pulled the top piece off and and use the hard plastic beside the mouse pad as a writing surface. Quickly pocketing the little yellow paper, I deleted the computer's immediate history and quietly stole back to the bedroom. I had to pack my things.
The dear repose for limbs with traveling tired,
But then begins a journey in my head
To work my mind when body's work's expired;
For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,
Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,
And keep my drooping eyelids open wide,
Looking on darkness which the blind do see;
Save that my soul's imaginary sight
Presents thy shadow to my sightless view,
Which like a jewel hung in ghastly night,
Makes black night beauteous and her old face new.
Lo, thus, by day my limbs, by night my mind.
For thee, and for myself, no quiet find.'
- Sonnet #26
By Sir William Shakespeare.
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
A soft shimmering sheen of rain fell out of the sky, catching the light of the sun and refracting it back to my eyes in rays of shattered light, appearing to my weary mind a rainbow wrapped in gray drear.
My professor's voice was still droning on, endlessly, but I was only barely there. We were covering Shakespeare again, which I had already completely devoured, inside and out. Confident as I was, in my knowledge of the subject matter, I felt it was alright for me to drift off.
I had skimmed over the sonnets yet again, the night before. This, coupled with the soft spring atmosphere reminded me of him. It was three years ago, around this time of year, that I last saw him, climbing out of my bed room window to return to the strange world to which he belonged. Sometimes, I was able to forget about him for weeks on end. But, other times, times like then, with the shining wet light outside and the lyrical words of love droning inside, it seemed nearly impossible.
- Loveless : Ritsu : 41 -
The house is extremely lonely without Ritsuka. When he is home, a strong, pervasive calm infects the whole house. Unlike other young men his age, he feels no need to go out. Nor, to entertain himself with a fervor when in. He seems like he's in a constant state of preponderance, especially these last few weeks.
You see, currently, Ritsuka has been taking some challenging college level classes at the small, private college at the bottom of the hill. He had long ago proved himself sufficient for graduation from high school. I had meant to prove to him he was not as smart as he insisted and allowed him to take equivalency exams for all of the top level courses that seniors took. Unfortunately, he passed all of them and promptly began coming to school only when he felt the mood over take him. As an educator, I didn't like the idea of him sitting at home and letting his mind to go to rot (even if it happened to be rotting over Bukowski, at the time). Thus, I encouraged him to take further classes. But, they have only made him more distant. He says that the courses there are simply thought provoking and he enjoys them, but I worry. I dislike seeing him become so detached. I'd rather not see him become like myself.
Though I sometimes got down like that, the fact that he had proved to be so intelligent inspired me to dream. "Professor Aoyagi," I muttered beneath my breath. Yes, that sounded wonderful. Besides, perhaps all he needed was such a great status added to the beginning of his name and my students would stop falling all over him. I understand that he is kind and extremely sympathetic to the young Warcraft's plight, but that is no reason for them to try becoming overly friendly with him. He does belong to someone, after all. Not to mention that he is a sacrifice, not to be mingled with Warcrafts all day long.
Slowly rising from my place in front of the laptop, I went to the mantle to examine the three pictures of Ritsuka and myself together. There were two more that was just of each of us separately. Picking up the first one, I saw a formal and uncomfortable Ritsuka, one I did not know very well. It was the picture taken right after we met by my younger sister. She had insisted on it and it was the very first picture with the two of us together, so I had always held onto it. The second one was also not taken very happily. It was some ways into the relationship, about a year ago, after I was done with the secretary and Ritsuka gave my student a little space. There was a storming sky coming in the background, but he was smiling gently, as if to mock the angry clouds behind him. It was a sad smile. I did not like the picture, but I kept it around. As a reminder. Of mistakes made. Finally, there was the third one, my favorite one. We had taken it at Tokyo over the summer, a month ago. Ritsuka was smiling happily, a huge wide smile plastered across his face. I was standing beside him with my arm around his shoulder, an equally uncommon smile on my face. Behind us was Hachiko the dog. For a moment, I entertained taking out the other photos I had of the trip, but decided against it.
After all, Ritsuka would be home soon.
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
/Weary with toil, I haste me to bed,/
/The dear repose for limbs with traveling tired,/
I hated climbing that stupid mountain. If I never had to walk again, I would have been fine. Being struck with paraplegia right then would have been a godsend, I swear it.
As I dragged myself through the front door and took off the outer layer of my rain drenched clothing, I heard Ritsu calling my name from the study.
"Yeah?" I called back, to lazy to actually form a sentence.
He came into the hall, leaning himself against the door frame, and looking me up and down. "You look horrible," he said, nonchalantly.
"Yeah thanks. 'Cause, that's just how I feel..." I grunted out, not feeling like getting into an argument, but also not wanting to put any effort into a retort.
"Come here, let me get you cleaned up," he offered, softening his tone significantly. It made me think again of how much change had happened after both of our supposed affairs and the end to the more violent parts of the relationship. Ritsu did not aggravate me so much after that. I realized, over time, that he was trying to keep me near him. I had not wanted to leave him. However, I do not think he will believe me, no matter how many times I tell him so.
"Are you hungry? I can make you something. I know how tiring lectures can be," he offered. I refused again. I had eaten a little bit between classes, anyway. Not to mention I hadn't had a very big appetite lately.
"That's all right. I'm just tired," I replied.
"I'll help you up to bed, then," he decided, closing the the kitchen door with a kind of finality that suggested that it was not up for my discretion.
With that strength that always surprised me, Ritsu picked me up and carried me up the stairs. His warmth was so kind and inviting that I started to fall asleep while in his arms. He put me on the bed and changed my clothes. He kissed my forehead and turned off the light. I did not last long enough to hear him close the door.
/But then begins a journey in my head/
/For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,/
/Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,/
- Beloved : Soubi : 25 -
It was raining outside and I wished that Ritsuka was with me. It had been raining since the middle of the day and I wished that Ritsuka was there. It started out as nothing more than a mist, but steadily built to a full on downpour and, yes, I wished with all of my being that Ritsuka was beside me.
My paintings had been selling like mad, since Ritsuka was taken from me. Ironically, I'm a much better artist when I'm full of a black despair. The critics were all raving about my characteristic butterflies. I wondered what Ritsuka would say about it. I would have bet anything that they would have gone mad with frustration and elation if they found out that I have a whole room of Violets for Ritsuka. I would never sell the paintings meant for Ritsuka.
Where was Ritsuka? Had he found his Fighter, yet? Was he happy? Was he sad? Is he hurt? Most of all, did he miss me? I thought my life had ended when Seimei left. That was a lie. Though my life had been going on since Ritsuka left, I was not in it. It was no longer my life that I was living. It could not be. I was not living at all. Both of the Aoyagi boys were gone from my life and I found that when both of them left, they tore out the part of my soul I had given to them and took it with them. I do not know if I can forgive them. I would not know that I would ever give either of them the chance to do it again...
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
- Caught In A Dream -
/Looking on darkness which the blind do see;/
/Save that my soul's imaginary sight/
/Presents thy shadow to my sightless view,/
/Which like a jewel hung in ghastly night,/
/Makes black night beauteous and her old face new./
I am running, but not going anywhere. I see the door to freedom from the pain. The pain that the Something that is chasing me promises, but I can not reach it. My legs hurt. My lungs burn. I feel dizzy. I am not going to make it. It is going to catch me. It will not let me escape. Mom!
It has got me.
-...................................................................-
-Ouch. My head hurts. Did She hit me in the head? I think She did. Otherwise, all that red stuff wouldn't be on the floor. Maybe, I'm going to die. I didn't think that death would feel so peaceful. What? I'm not allowed to die? That's mean! You can't do that! How can I possibly live after... -
It has got me. I can not get away! It is going to steal me away and I will not be able to see Him anymore!
-Which Him?-
Either of them! It is going to take me away so I will not be able to see either of the Hims. I do not know if I can take that... I can not do it. It can not make me! Huh?
.------------------------------------------------------.
There is a huge blue butterfly in the sky and it makes me think of the first Him. Meanwhile, It is gone, along with That Boy. It scares me terribly when That Boy comes forth. It just means that I have far less time left than before.
Forgetting my terror of a few moments ago, I chase after the butterfly with reckless abandon. I can feel myself running faster and faster, so that if I fell, I would surely break my legs. Still, I am perfectly set on catching that butterfly, to hold it in my hands for a single beautiful moment, before I let it go free again. I want that butterfly to be free. I only want to be able to brush up against it. That will be enough. That will never be enough.
It has landed now. The butterfly is sitting perilously on the petal of a dark purple violet. If I moved now, I could get it my grasp and never let it go. But, I do not. I hunker down and I just watch as the butterfly examines the flower with it's feelers. I wondered how long it will stay with the flower. Probably not very long. Somehow, that makes me very sad.
Someone sat down beside me, but I did not look up from the butterfly to see who it was.
"Are you going to catch it?" the man asked, and I could hear him smiling.
"No. I just want to watch."
"How come?"
"Well, it's so pretty. It deserves to be free."
"Does being pretty make you free or does it doom you to just the opposite?"
"You're weird. I just don't want to hurt it, because I like it. Is that so confusing?"
"I see. I like you too, Ritsuka."
"Huh?"
Soubi. Blue Butterfly. Soubi. Soubi is sitting beside me, smiling that smile that always suggested that he was just on the verge of bursting into laughter, though I had never seen him actually 'burst' into anything. I could not think or talk. I wanted to hold him and I wanted to run away. Instead, I just said, "Thank you."
~*~*~
I gasped and jolted upright.
"Soubi?" I spoke to the empty darkness of the bedroom. It was still early in the evening and Ritsu had not come to bed, yet. Still working, probably.
I sighed heavily. That had been the first time I had had such a dream like that in a long time. Who had I met in that dream? Someone scary and someone who was scary for another reason... Still, I could not think of who they were. The names did not come. I did remember one person, though. Soubi. Soubi was there and he was a butterfly. Or, was I a flower? I did not know. It was such a weird dream, but it really felt like Soubi was there with me.
"Soubi? Where are you?" I whispered into my hands
'I can't go on like this,' I thought gravely.
/Lo, thus, by day my limbs, by night my mind./
/For thee, and for myself, no quiet find./
- Beloved : Soubi : 25 -
- Waking In A Dream-
I gasped and jolted upright.
"Ritsuka?" I asked the impenetrable darkness. I had seen him. My beautiful Ritsuka covered in deep scars and without ears and tail. My poor Ritsuka torn apart by a cruel world that I could not protect him from. I had seen him closely examining a butterfly sitting precariously on the petal of a deep indigo violet. I had spoken to him and confessed to him just one more time. He had thanked me. Dear God, he had thanked me for saying that I liked him. My Ritsuka?
"Ritsuka? Please, where are you?" I spoke to the darkness.
- Loveless : Ritsuka : 16 -
'I can't go on like this,' I thought. 'I have to talk to Soubi, somehow. Get some closure. Otherwise, I'm going to loose it!'
But, to do such I thing, I would have to get in touch with Soubi. Thankfully, I had pretty solid idea of where to find such information on Soubi.
I stole myself silently out of the bedroom. First, I checked to make sure that Ritsu was still working busily in his study. Better yet, he was asleep on the couch. He probably hadn't wanted to wake me up by crawling over me to get into bed. Feeling a little guilty, I had covered him up with the blanket from the back of the couch and went on my way towards Ritsu's study.
That is where I stood, frozen by a deeper guilt, transfixed as I stared at the five pictures standing on the mantelpiece. Beside the one in the middle (the one Ritsu had put up a month ago), there were three new photos in shiny new frames, all of our trip to Tokyo. All of them with the two of us together. All of them with the two or us (or, the one with just me) smiling happily and pointing at some landmark or another.
Pulling myself together, I moved slowly towards the laptop laying closed on the side table beside the one end of the dark leather couch. Taking a seat and pulling the computer onto my lap, I began the search for His address. After but a few minutes of searching, I found it. Right there in Ritsu's address book was Soubi-kun's address. It was there as innocently as my own or his sisters. How did I know that he would have it right there where he could look it up whenever he felt the need? I suppose I am just magical like that.
I ran quickly to the kitchen and came back with a pad of paper and a pencil. However, I stopped just before I wrote down the address, remembering a detective show where the policeman had found his killer by the indents left on the piece of paper beneath. Ritsu would be just so intelligent to pull a move just like that. Half scolding myself for being paranoid, I pulled the top piece off and and use the hard plastic beside the mouse pad as a writing surface. Quickly pocketing the little yellow paper, I deleted the computer's immediate history and quietly stole back to the bedroom. I had to pack my things.