Mobile Suit Gundam 00 Fan Fiction ❯ The Seduction of Tieria Erde ❯ Part 3 ( Chapter 3 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Saanrio 
Anime/Manga: Mobile Suit Gundam 00 Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 06.05.2008 | Pages: 1 | Words: 2.0K | Visits: 464 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Mobile Suit Gundam 00 Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 06.05.2008 | Pages: 1 | Words: 2.0K | Visits: 464 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam 00 or any of the characters therein. I am not making any profit from this work of fiction, nor do I intend to. To the best of my knowledge, Gundam 00 is owned by Sunrise and licensed by Bandai, and all rights belong to them.
He waited until night fell, until the other three Meisters had all gone to their rooms and to bed before he left his own room. They had sent Setsuna, earlier, to tell him there was food ready, but he'd stayed silent and refused to get up and answer the door. Let them think he'd been sleeping, or sulking, or whatever they chose, it really didn't matter to him. He'd been confused by the scene on the beach earlier, wanting nothing more than to calm the inescapable panic he'd felt and retreat back into his calm, cold shell.
So, he'd waited. Waiting had helped to calm him, as it was something that, though he didn't like it, was familiar and therefore comforting. Once the halls had been dark and quiet, the only light coming from the moon shining in the high windows, then he'd left his room and quietly left the house. He returned to the beach where the others had been swimming earlier in the day and sat back beneath the same tree again, resting his back against it and looking out at the waves that washed up on the beach, allowing the rhythmic sound of the ocean to wash over him, taking him with it into a state not unlike meditation, where he could examine his reactions without fear of emotional entanglement.
He allowed his eyes to drift closed, breathing deep, presenting for all the world the appearance of having fallen asleep, but his mind was still flowing over the events of the day - both observing again and analyzing his reactions, cataloguing every one of the emotions his flawed self had felt. He'd been raised to avoid emotions, to push them down and aside in favor of logic and reason. He still had them, yes, he was in fact expected to have them. He was expected to be able to analyze and react to any situation regardless of what emotion he was feeling at the time. His training had even included exercises to insure that he would be able to choose a course of action and implement it even in cases of extreme terror. Though the focus then had been on facing such situations in battle, in the cockpit of a Gundam, not on a sunny beach with his fellow Meisters.
He recognized the panic, that emotion was familiar from his training. He'd felt panicked on several occasions, even to the same point he'd been this afternoon, with his breath coming fast and shallow and pained in his chest. He needed to go back further, before the panic. He needed to know what had caused it. It had to be something he wasn't familiar with, or hadn't been expecting. The small shock of fear he'd gotten when Allelujah threatened to throw him in the water, that was explainable, as he didn't like to swim, or be in water that was more than knee-deep. It had to be something else, then. His mind replayed getting up from under the tree, walking across the sand, Lockon's hand on his arm, turning and finding Lockon so unnervingly close.
Tieria paused, reexamining that moment. He did feel something unusual then, something that, even now as he recalled looking at Lockon so close to him, caused a stirring in his groin. This was it. This was what had scared him, what even now was starting to send little tremors through his calm. He took a deep breath, letting the sound of the waves pass over and through him again, slowly regaining his center that he'd been pushed away from by shock. While it was something he knew of, something he had felt a glimmer of before in his life, he was still at a loss as to how to deal with it.
All of his schooling had been done through his link with Veda, so he had never been in contact with others his age. His only interactions outside of Veda had been with the scientists of Celestial Being, men and women years older than him, who looked at him as an experiment, not as a human. In their minds, though his body was human, his mind had been altered enough to make him something 'other' than human. What, exactly, this 'other' was being something never explained to him, Tieria had never really worried about it. He was just Tieria. He didn't remember a time when he'd been allowed to show his emotions and thoughts plainly and openly, trained from an early age to always project a sense of calm. There were notations he had read in his records about tantrums when he was entering adolescence, and further notations of additional meditation and concentration techniques he'd been taught to help him gain control of his body's urges and help deny the side effects of the hormones causing necessary changes to his physique.
Having identified the emotion that had caught him so off-guard, having labeled it as 'attraction' and the response from his body as the beginnings of 'arousal,' he again concentrated on the sound of the waves as he began the series of mental exercises he'd been taught so long ago. Deep breaths in and out, letting his mind close out the external influences, seeing only the internal processes, isolating those pathways that controlled his emotional and physiological responses, he tried to close himself off. He thought of Lockon - of being so close he could see the small variations in the color of his eyes, the small flecks of gold around the pupil that would fade away in darker light; of the warmth of his breath against Tieria's cheek. Feeling again the stirrings in his groin, he searched for the pathways that controlled the physical sensations.
As he searched, an errant thought crossed his mind. He'd never been allowed to truly experience emotions just for the sake of having them, instead expected, taught and encouraged to hide them and only acknowledge them if they would benefit Celestial Being by their use. He had, on one occasion, been disciplined for being 'too human.' Now, though, he was away from those who had imposed those rules on him. He still followed them, but the desire had surfaced once or twice, to know what it was to be human. He'd heard whispers from the few others who had spent some time working with or around him, and he'd heard them wonder if he wasn't some kind of robot. It made sense to him, that they would wonder. Let them wonder, as long as they didn't know the truth it made little difference to him.
Tieria had had years of experience compartmentalizing. If he could separate this ... attraction for Lockon Stratos ... then he could continue to perform without flaw and still experience this, allow himself to feel human. As long as he kept this separate from his duties for Celestial Being, as long as it didn't interfere with the missions of the Gundam Meisters, then he was - in this, at least - free to do as he chose. Opening his eyes, he sat for a moment, watching the play of moonlight on the waves as they washed ashore. The sound continued to wash over him, soothing and calming the flitter of fear he got at the fact that his plan was not precisely within the parameters he had worked with for as long as he could remember. It would work, he told himself.
After a few more minutes spent listening to the waves and watching the moonlight, he had managed to convince himself that his plan had no flaw because he would be carrying it out, and he was capable of making sure his emotions did not interfere with his job. He stood, and walked back to the house at an unhurried pace. Though it was early in the morning hours and the sun would be up in only another hour or so, he felt rested, his meditations having helped to ease the fatigue in his body even as his mind had been occupied. When he entered the house, he saw a light on in the kitchen and went to investigate, wondering who other than himself would be up this late at night.
Tieria paused in the doorway, watching in the moment before his presence was noticed. Lockon was sitting at the table, leaning the chair back on two legs, his head tilted up to the ceiling and his eyes closed. For a brief second, Tieria wondered if perhaps he had fallen asleep in that position, but then his eyes opened and he reached for the mug on the table in front of him. He paused, his hand halfway to its goal and smiled as his eyes came to rest on Tieria.
Tieria stepped forward a bit, resting one hand against the frame of the doorway, leaning against it slightly, a habit learned from years spent in space. The smile Lockon gave him caused a small flutter somewhere in the vicinity of his belly, and he suddenly knew the meaning of the expression about butterflies in one's stomach. Despite the resolve that he could allow this man to affect him only as much as he wanted him to, he was uncertain and slightly nervous. He'd never allowed anything like this from himself before and the prospect was suddenly very real and was rapidly becoming alarming.
Lockon rose slowly, leaving the mug on the table, forgotten as he crossed the kitchen, his eyes locked on Tieria's, holding him in place with the force of that gaze. He stopped just within arm's reach and spoke softly, so softly that if Tieria's hearing weren't as sharp as it was, he'd have had to step forward to be sure he'd heard correctly.
"Did you have a nice walk?"
Tieria swallowed and nodded, wanting to ask how Lockon had even known he'd been gone, but for some reason reluctant to break the moment by speaking. He nodded to Lockon again, then started to turn away. Lockon caught his hand as he dropped it from the doorframe, and he turned back quickly. He watched, transfixed, the butterflies in his stomach fluttering faster, as Lockon leaned forward and brushed his lips across Tieria's knuckles. The touch was light, but still enough that Tieria could feel the softness and warmth of Lockon's mouth against his skin. He sucked in a breath, barely managing to keep it silent, but couldn't suppress the small shiver as it traveled down his spine. Lockon loosened his grip on Tieria's hand and he snatched it back and turned, denying the urge to run back to his room.
Lockon watched him go, smiling. He slowly wandered back to the table and picked up the mug, rinsing out what was left of his hot chocolate in the sink and placing the mug in the rack to dry. His thoughts were stuck on Tieria, on the feel of his palm held in Lockon's, the smoothness of his skin, the contrast between Tieria's space pallor and his own sun-kissed hue. He went back to his room and lay on his bed, closing his eyes and allowing his dreams to bring him visions of a possible future where Tieria was his. The sound of the waves through the open window followed him to his dreams.
He waited until night fell, until the other three Meisters had all gone to their rooms and to bed before he left his own room. They had sent Setsuna, earlier, to tell him there was food ready, but he'd stayed silent and refused to get up and answer the door. Let them think he'd been sleeping, or sulking, or whatever they chose, it really didn't matter to him. He'd been confused by the scene on the beach earlier, wanting nothing more than to calm the inescapable panic he'd felt and retreat back into his calm, cold shell.
So, he'd waited. Waiting had helped to calm him, as it was something that, though he didn't like it, was familiar and therefore comforting. Once the halls had been dark and quiet, the only light coming from the moon shining in the high windows, then he'd left his room and quietly left the house. He returned to the beach where the others had been swimming earlier in the day and sat back beneath the same tree again, resting his back against it and looking out at the waves that washed up on the beach, allowing the rhythmic sound of the ocean to wash over him, taking him with it into a state not unlike meditation, where he could examine his reactions without fear of emotional entanglement.
He allowed his eyes to drift closed, breathing deep, presenting for all the world the appearance of having fallen asleep, but his mind was still flowing over the events of the day - both observing again and analyzing his reactions, cataloguing every one of the emotions his flawed self had felt. He'd been raised to avoid emotions, to push them down and aside in favor of logic and reason. He still had them, yes, he was in fact expected to have them. He was expected to be able to analyze and react to any situation regardless of what emotion he was feeling at the time. His training had even included exercises to insure that he would be able to choose a course of action and implement it even in cases of extreme terror. Though the focus then had been on facing such situations in battle, in the cockpit of a Gundam, not on a sunny beach with his fellow Meisters.
He recognized the panic, that emotion was familiar from his training. He'd felt panicked on several occasions, even to the same point he'd been this afternoon, with his breath coming fast and shallow and pained in his chest. He needed to go back further, before the panic. He needed to know what had caused it. It had to be something he wasn't familiar with, or hadn't been expecting. The small shock of fear he'd gotten when Allelujah threatened to throw him in the water, that was explainable, as he didn't like to swim, or be in water that was more than knee-deep. It had to be something else, then. His mind replayed getting up from under the tree, walking across the sand, Lockon's hand on his arm, turning and finding Lockon so unnervingly close.
Tieria paused, reexamining that moment. He did feel something unusual then, something that, even now as he recalled looking at Lockon so close to him, caused a stirring in his groin. This was it. This was what had scared him, what even now was starting to send little tremors through his calm. He took a deep breath, letting the sound of the waves pass over and through him again, slowly regaining his center that he'd been pushed away from by shock. While it was something he knew of, something he had felt a glimmer of before in his life, he was still at a loss as to how to deal with it.
All of his schooling had been done through his link with Veda, so he had never been in contact with others his age. His only interactions outside of Veda had been with the scientists of Celestial Being, men and women years older than him, who looked at him as an experiment, not as a human. In their minds, though his body was human, his mind had been altered enough to make him something 'other' than human. What, exactly, this 'other' was being something never explained to him, Tieria had never really worried about it. He was just Tieria. He didn't remember a time when he'd been allowed to show his emotions and thoughts plainly and openly, trained from an early age to always project a sense of calm. There were notations he had read in his records about tantrums when he was entering adolescence, and further notations of additional meditation and concentration techniques he'd been taught to help him gain control of his body's urges and help deny the side effects of the hormones causing necessary changes to his physique.
Having identified the emotion that had caught him so off-guard, having labeled it as 'attraction' and the response from his body as the beginnings of 'arousal,' he again concentrated on the sound of the waves as he began the series of mental exercises he'd been taught so long ago. Deep breaths in and out, letting his mind close out the external influences, seeing only the internal processes, isolating those pathways that controlled his emotional and physiological responses, he tried to close himself off. He thought of Lockon - of being so close he could see the small variations in the color of his eyes, the small flecks of gold around the pupil that would fade away in darker light; of the warmth of his breath against Tieria's cheek. Feeling again the stirrings in his groin, he searched for the pathways that controlled the physical sensations.
As he searched, an errant thought crossed his mind. He'd never been allowed to truly experience emotions just for the sake of having them, instead expected, taught and encouraged to hide them and only acknowledge them if they would benefit Celestial Being by their use. He had, on one occasion, been disciplined for being 'too human.' Now, though, he was away from those who had imposed those rules on him. He still followed them, but the desire had surfaced once or twice, to know what it was to be human. He'd heard whispers from the few others who had spent some time working with or around him, and he'd heard them wonder if he wasn't some kind of robot. It made sense to him, that they would wonder. Let them wonder, as long as they didn't know the truth it made little difference to him.
Tieria had had years of experience compartmentalizing. If he could separate this ... attraction for Lockon Stratos ... then he could continue to perform without flaw and still experience this, allow himself to feel human. As long as he kept this separate from his duties for Celestial Being, as long as it didn't interfere with the missions of the Gundam Meisters, then he was - in this, at least - free to do as he chose. Opening his eyes, he sat for a moment, watching the play of moonlight on the waves as they washed ashore. The sound continued to wash over him, soothing and calming the flitter of fear he got at the fact that his plan was not precisely within the parameters he had worked with for as long as he could remember. It would work, he told himself.
After a few more minutes spent listening to the waves and watching the moonlight, he had managed to convince himself that his plan had no flaw because he would be carrying it out, and he was capable of making sure his emotions did not interfere with his job. He stood, and walked back to the house at an unhurried pace. Though it was early in the morning hours and the sun would be up in only another hour or so, he felt rested, his meditations having helped to ease the fatigue in his body even as his mind had been occupied. When he entered the house, he saw a light on in the kitchen and went to investigate, wondering who other than himself would be up this late at night.
Tieria paused in the doorway, watching in the moment before his presence was noticed. Lockon was sitting at the table, leaning the chair back on two legs, his head tilted up to the ceiling and his eyes closed. For a brief second, Tieria wondered if perhaps he had fallen asleep in that position, but then his eyes opened and he reached for the mug on the table in front of him. He paused, his hand halfway to its goal and smiled as his eyes came to rest on Tieria.
Tieria stepped forward a bit, resting one hand against the frame of the doorway, leaning against it slightly, a habit learned from years spent in space. The smile Lockon gave him caused a small flutter somewhere in the vicinity of his belly, and he suddenly knew the meaning of the expression about butterflies in one's stomach. Despite the resolve that he could allow this man to affect him only as much as he wanted him to, he was uncertain and slightly nervous. He'd never allowed anything like this from himself before and the prospect was suddenly very real and was rapidly becoming alarming.
Lockon rose slowly, leaving the mug on the table, forgotten as he crossed the kitchen, his eyes locked on Tieria's, holding him in place with the force of that gaze. He stopped just within arm's reach and spoke softly, so softly that if Tieria's hearing weren't as sharp as it was, he'd have had to step forward to be sure he'd heard correctly.
"Did you have a nice walk?"
Tieria swallowed and nodded, wanting to ask how Lockon had even known he'd been gone, but for some reason reluctant to break the moment by speaking. He nodded to Lockon again, then started to turn away. Lockon caught his hand as he dropped it from the doorframe, and he turned back quickly. He watched, transfixed, the butterflies in his stomach fluttering faster, as Lockon leaned forward and brushed his lips across Tieria's knuckles. The touch was light, but still enough that Tieria could feel the softness and warmth of Lockon's mouth against his skin. He sucked in a breath, barely managing to keep it silent, but couldn't suppress the small shiver as it traveled down his spine. Lockon loosened his grip on Tieria's hand and he snatched it back and turned, denying the urge to run back to his room.
Lockon watched him go, smiling. He slowly wandered back to the table and picked up the mug, rinsing out what was left of his hot chocolate in the sink and placing the mug in the rack to dry. His thoughts were stuck on Tieria, on the feel of his palm held in Lockon's, the smoothness of his skin, the contrast between Tieria's space pallor and his own sun-kissed hue. He went back to his room and lay on his bed, closing his eyes and allowing his dreams to bring him visions of a possible future where Tieria was his. The sound of the waves through the open window followed him to his dreams.