Nadesico Fan Fiction ❯ To Die or Not to Die ❯ Chapter 12

A/N: Glad you liked the last chapter! ^^ Anyway, I promise this one will be longer, because, well, it's taking the term songfic and going a bit too far. @_@ And things may get a bit confusing… yeah. Okay, there IS a disclaimer this time. A definite disclaimer. First of all, I have never played piano in my life, nor have I taken any lessons. Any misgivings about stuff are my fault, gomen in advance. "Deliver Me" is property of Sarah Brightman, "All you Wanted" is Michelle Branch's, Camui Gackt did "Regret", and "Orurean no Seisenshi" is from the 5th Sera Myu Musical. The playlist itself: "Deliver Me", "All you Wanted", "Delicious Island", "Orurean no Seisenshi", "Watashi Rashiku" by Houko Kuwashima, "Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai" by Omi Minami, and "Regret". This takes place in Episode 19 (of course). If I were you, I'd keep my eye out for some not-so-subtle foreshadowing. Oh, and I translated "Orurean no Seisenshi", "Watashi Rashiku", and "Anata no Ichiban Ni Naritai", so don't freak if it's all wrong. On to the fic!

~*~

(Ariko and Uribatake Interlude)

'Okasama would be upset if she saw me now, but that's not my problem now. I'll think about that later.' Prince Ariko laid a gentle hand upon the smooth steel that made the beautiful creature before him. 'An Aestivalis. I've seen them on television, but never this close. And the news just doesn't do it justice.'

Ariko knew these were truly his thoughts, and not those of his usual weariness. 'I'm usually tired during tutoring, but… I'm completely alert now. Was it the change in sleeping conditions?' Ariko slept on a cot in Ruri's room the night before, wearing a Nergal off-duty shirt and an apology from the captain. '"I'm sorry, your highness, for the living conditions, but we really didn't expect to take you with us," says she. Frankly, I don't care. That was the best sleep I had gotten all my life. It makes me wish I was born into another family just that much more.'

A clang of metal hitting metal stole Ariko's thoughts, scaring him and making his hand jerk away violently from the machine he was admiring. "Ano… who's there?"

Uribatake suddenly noticed the prince standing by the extra black Aesti. "Your Highness, what're you doing down here? Aren't you supposed to be in the cafeteria or on the bridge or something?" Ariko nodded slowly. "Yes, but…" He turned his attention towards the Aestivalis again. "I couldn't resist coming and looking at these elegant machines."

Uribatake noticed a small smile on the child's lips. 'I don't know how I do it, but I somehow get attached to the children here. Ruri is like my daughter, Omoikane thinks me as his father, and now the first prince of Peaceland is opening his heart to me. Maybe I'm just the overall trustworthy father figure.' Images of Hikaru's rejection flooded his mind. 'But if that's the case… Hikaru doesn't trust me. I wonder why. But somehow… I think she lied to me.' He shook his head, focusing on the matter at hand. "They really are lovely, aren't they?"

Ariko didn't expect something to cut the silence, so he was slightly startled. "Huh? Oh, yeah. The Aestis." He blushed suddenly. "I mean, Aestivalises!" Uribatake gave him a funny look. "You can call them Aestis if you want. We all do. What's the problem?"

Ariko shook his head, his silver strands of hair flapping his forehead and ears. "No… Okasama tells us all to use the proper word and name for things. So… I guess I was expecting to be scolded." Uribatake shook his head. "Here, we see giving things nicknames as a sign of endearment. Or, that you like the thing very much." Uribatake looked down at the small boy. "How old are you, Your Highness?"

Ariko looked up. "Please, just call me Ariko. I'm eleven, Uribatake-san." The head mechanic seemed to be deep in thought. "Well then…" Dark brown eyes met blue. "I was a bit younger than you when I got involved with machines. However, it's obvious you share that love, don't you?" Ariko's silver head bobbed up and down. Uribatake knelt down so he could see him face to face.

"This will probably piss off your mother, but she's not exactly here right now, is she?" Ariko shook his head, slowly catching on to what the man was saying. "You want to start working here in the hangar? I'll teach you everything you'll want to know." Ariko's eyes got big and his jaw dropped.

"You'll really let me? Oh, could I, Uribatake-san? Could I?" Ariko looked like he was going to burst with happiness.

Uribatake snickered at Ariko's delight. "Sure! We'd have to figure out the payment and get you a uniform, but I'm sure Prospector wouldn't mind setting it all up. Besides, you seem like you'd listen a lot better than these idiots around here."

Ariko wrapped his arms around Uribatake's neck. "Oh thank you thank you thank you, Uribatake-san! You won't regret this! I'll be a good student!" Uribatake laughed. "Settle, will ya? Jeez. If I was your dad, I'd probably be relieved to have you gone, if you act like this all the time!" Ariko blushed and whispered, "I do not," but the smile stayed on his face.

It stayed there all day. By the time the sun set, he had his own set of uniforms and his own room.

~*~

Each of the Three Angels had a different bedtime procedure. Hikaru would clear off her bed before all else. Izumi would go take a shower, changing into her pajamas. Ryoko just stripped down to her underwear. Hikaru would change, then plug in some headphones. Ryoko would probably be asleep by now. Izumi would finally get into bed. Hikaru fell asleep listening to one of her weird mixes of Japanese music, Celtic music, old English hits, and random Classical and Techno pieces. This is all that Ryoko caught, while she floated downward to deep sleep, unable to wake.

Ryoko dreamed. She dreamed most nights, but recently, her dreams weren't as strange. They were just replays of pieces of her memory. She looked down. Sure enough, she was much shorter, and wearing a dark blue dress. 'I haven't worn dresses since I was five.' That was when Ryoko was on Earth with her father. It was the first time she had been on the planet. 'Before Mom died.'

The blackness around her bent, giving way to the surroundings of her memory. She was sitting on her dad's shoulders, near an airplane hangar. It was nearly night. That much she remembered, because she- "There's the first star! Look, Dad!"

'Yeah, it's playing pretty much like clockwork. This is exactly how it happened. My subconscious is either losing it's imagination, or this is supposed to mean something.' "That's good, Ryoko!" praised her father. "Now look for that special star inside you."

"The what?" Little Ryoko was confused. 'The special star… After all this time… 15 years later, I still haven't found it.'

"Your special star is a talent, something your best at. A girl who knows what her special star is will have a life full of happiness!" 'Well, that explains a lot. I certainly don't have a life full of happiness.'

"What's my star? What is it, Dad?" 'Don't hold your breath, Ryoko-chan. You won't know for quite some time. Hell, we still don't know.' The surroundings bent again, leaving Ryoko in nothing but darkness.

Ryoko's blue eyes opened, and saw nothing but darkness. She sat up. She had been sleeping for a few hours, as Hikaru and Izumi seemed to be knocked out. A pale leg shot out of Izumi's bunk. 'Well, okay, not knocked out, but definitely asleep.' Ryoko laid back down, whispering, "Stupid memories."

Hikaru heard this. 'Another nightmare… I guess she gets to sleep in again. Not that it's a bad thing. But I'm getting worried. She never used to have nightmares like this. Maybe Itsuki's bringing up some bad thoughts. And I don't mean naughty one's either.' Hikaru laid her head back on her pillow and covered her eyes with an arm. 'We'll just talk to her tomorrow. I probably just worry too much.'

~*~

Perhaps Hikaru did worry too much. Perhaps it wasn't the best choice to lose sleep because of Ryoko's memory dreams. Perhaps she should have just done what Gai always did when Akito had dreams like these, and just let it be. But, of course, she did exactly the opposite. So, when she walked by herself to the cafeteria, wondering if she was just going to fall asleep while walking, it wasn't too much of a surprise that she thought she was hallucinating.

After all, a girl doesn't always get to see her two best male friends making out, about to throw each other on the table and fuck like rabbits so early in the morning.

Hikaru simply blinked, rubbed her eyes, then slowly walked towards the table. Making sure they didn't notice her until she wanted them to, she slipped into her chair next to Gai. She took a deep quiet breath. Then cleared her throat.

Akito and Gai sprang apart like a released spring, fixing their clothes and trying to look normal. As they realized they'd been had, that Hikaru had seen everything, Gai cleared his own throat. Akito just tried to hide his very, very red face. Hikaru, as sleepy as she was, burst out laughing. "You two really know how to make a girl lonely!" said she, through her giggles.

Gai registered the sentence faster than Hikaru realized she said it. "You? Lonely? How come?" Gai wrapped an arm around her shoulders, giving her a little hug. Hikaru noticed the comforting movement, and her attention went straight the Martian. 'Wow, Akito doesn't look peeved. Just concerned about me…'

"Oh, it's nothing." Hikaru returned Gai's embrace. "I just now realized I have two very good friends, guy friends no less, that won't drop me once they get to know me." She smiled. The two other pilots had no freaking idea what she was talking about. Before they could question her, though, she had an interrogation of her own. "Akito-chan, the hell are you doing out here anyway? Aren't you supposed to be cooking or something right now?"

"We're trading off breakfast and lunch," came a voice from the kitchen. A red eyebrow shot up. "Sayuri-san?"

Sure enough, there was the blue-haired cook futzing around in the kitchen. "Yep. Least he can do, to making me cry." Hikaru glared at the Martian cook. "You made her cry, Akito???"

Akito's jaw had gone slack. "No, I didn't Sayuri! You started whining that you liked me and I didn't pick you! I switched to shut you up!"

The singsong reply, "I know~!" The two other pilots laughed as Akito's face turned from red to purple with frustration.

At about this time, one of the metal doors slid open and Izumi fell square on her ass through it. "Itai! Dammit, Ryoko!"

Hikaru swiveled completely on the bench. "Ryoko, the hell are you doing out of bed? We let you sleep in for a reason, you know!"

From what Gai could process from the situation, Ryoko was supposed to be sleeping, and Izumi found her going to the cafeteria. Izumi tried to push her back, but Ryoko apparently pushed her the whole way there. Hikaru was angry because of this, and Akito was very confused. 'Hey, I am too, so it's not too bad.'

The redhead jumped up from the bench and ran over to Izumi, lifting her up. "I don't need help, Hikaru-chan!" But Izumi let her pull her up anyway. Ryoko walked over to their table and sat in her spot, across from Hikaru's.

When the other two Angels sat in their respective spots, Hikaru glared at the green haired pilot. "You're supposed to be in top condition for piloting, Ryoko-chan. When you wake up in the middle of the night with nightmares, that's not top condition!"

The tomboy glared at the otaku. "What concern is it of yours anyway, Hikaru?" Izumi answered for her. "It's been her concern for years, Ryoko. That's not very fair to her, don't you think? Just because you're grouchy-"

Ryoko swiveled to face the quiet pilot. "I am not grouchy!" she yelled. A moment of silence passed before she faced Hikaru again. "Okay, so maybe I am grouchy… I'm sorry, Hikaru-chan." Hikaru nodded. "That's why we let you sleep, Ryoko-chan."

Ryoko sighed and rubbed her eyes. "I know… I've just had a lot to think about for the past couple weeks…"

It seemed almost appropriate for one of those things to walk through the door just then, brushing her purple hair as usual. Itsuki looked at their table, a little surprised to actually see Ryoko there, then walked over and plopped between Izumi and Ryoko. "Ohayo, Jiro, Tenkawa-san, Hikaru-chan, Izumi-san." She paused, then made her tone a bit colder. "Subaru-san."

Ryoko caught the difference, and felt quite uncomfortable. She faced forward, and noticed Hikaru squinting at something past her head. "What?"

Hikaru didn't hear her. "What IS that?" She got up and walked to the wall. Unnoticed by everyone else, there was a poster of a brown haired girl in a very pretty dress. Hikaru blinked, then tried to read the kana aloud. "First Star Beauty Pageant… Swimsuit and Talent Competition…" Her eyes brightened. "Winner gets an idol singing contract!?!" Izumi and Itsuki walked calmly over. "Entries must be submitted to Victor Bros by midnight, February 16th. Holy shit, that's tonight!" The other two girl pilots nodded. They hadn't seemed to realize that Ryoko, as soon as she heard the word "talent", left the cafeteria, but the two men seemed to.

"…Hey, Hikaru?" Hikaru turned her attention from the poster to Gai. "Ah?" "…How come Ryoko left when you started reading that?"

Hikaru was at a blank at first. "What… I don't know." Izumi nodded a bit. "People can be taught many things, but only if they find their desires caught." Nobody understood this, of course, and the quiet pilot refused to explain.

~*~

(Hikaru and Izumi Interlude)

Shortly after everyone got settled at his or her stations, Yurika made an announcement about the pageant. "For all those superstars that want to be idol singers, or an space cadets that want to try their hand at being Captain for the day, enter the First Star Beauty Pageant now!"

Hikaru went to her room and started searching through her CDs. "Hayashibara Megumi? No. Ai Orikasa? No. Masami Okui-" A voice cut through her rambling. "You sing Mask and I'm going to kill you." The redhead turned a bit. "Why, is that what you're going to do, Izumi?"

The blue-haired pilot shook her head. "I already know what I'm singing." Izumi opened the closet and pulled out a somewhat old guitar. Hikaru was impressed. "Wow, you're not going to play ukulele?"

Izumi shook her head. "My song requires guitar." Slender pale fingers caressed the neck of the blue instrument till it reached the headstock. She turned the tuning pegs, while softly humming an old American song that Hikaru recognized. "You're gonna sing that?"

Crimson embraced brown. "There's a problem?" Hikaru shook her head. "No, of course not, but… you have a reason, I know it!"

Izumi smiled slightly. She set the guitar down on her bed, then walked over to the full body mirror. "Yes, there is. You have a very keen sense of comprehension." Izumi pulled on a blue strand in the bangs covering her right eye. "Very keen."

Hikaru walked over, wrapping her arms around the much taller pilot's waist. "And I suppose the song isn't about me at all." Izumi's pale hand lowered and squeezed the redhead's arm. "Gomen, Hikaru-chan." Hikaru sighed and released Izumi.

"It's a shame… I guess I'm just going to have to find a song that will… portray my own emotions clearly." Izumi glanced at Hikaru. "Me? Or… Uribatake-san?"

Hikaru shrugged. "Either or. Something I can put my whole heart into." Izumi grunted. "So, even though you turned Uribatake down, you still like him." Hikaru glared at the older pilot. "Yes, but he's married. And he'd just crush me." Hikaru climbed up the ladder to her bed. "They all do."

Izumi opened Hikaru's CD case and started looking for a certain one. Pulling it out, she tossed it up, the redhead catching it with expertise. "Number 6, Hikaru. He might crush you, but hey. He made a better effort to understand you then those other guys did."

Hikaru looked at the CD. "What makes you thinks so, Izumi-chan?" The red-eyed pilot sat back on her own bed and pulled her guitar back into her lap before responding. "You reject him, and he doesn't run back, asking for forgiveness. He knows you wouldn't appreciate that. And I think he knows you lied to him, too. He let you have your space, let you think. Any of those other assholes never would have done that."

Hikaru considered this as she plugged in the disc, sticking her headphones on her head, and attempted to remember the lyrics to the song Izumi chose for her. 'She's right, I guess. Any of the other guys would have come running back after I said no. And… this song is perfect.' "Arigato, Izumi-chan," said Hikaru, a little more loudly than should have been.

The taller pilot simply smiled, and continued tuning her instrument, humming her song of choice.

~*~

Itsuki didn't realize Ryoko had a problem until lunch. They sat all in their usual places, with an empty seat where Akito usually sat. Hikaru had turned in her entry right before lunch, as did Izumi, however, Hikaru was the excited one about it. "What're you gonna do for the talent competition, Ryoko? I'm gonna sing a song!"

Ryoko paused from eating her rice to answer, monotone, "I'm not entering." Gai's eyebrows furrowed together. "Why not?" Ryoko took another bite. "I don't want to."

Izumi was going to interject her opinion, but Itsuki got to it first. "Why don't you want to, Subaru-san?" Itsuki wiped her mouth, then continued. "It can't be about the swimsuit portion, you'd easily win that." Ryoko's emotionless face went red and looked very uncomfortable. But Itsuki continued. "It isn't talent, because I'm sure you have a very long list of things you could do." Ryoko's blue eyes hit the ground. Hikaru and Izumi were feeling a bit… out of place, and they glanced at the male in their group. He cleared his throat and got up. The two girls nodded and followed his example, the three of them leaving without much purpose. Before Ryoko knew it, she was left all alone with the girl that had admitted to flirting with her, and she was harrying her about her nonparticipation in the pageant.

"…Don't you have a talent to do at the contest?" inquired the purple-haired pilot, thinking, maybe, she hit the nail on the head. Ryoko glared at the other pilot. "What's it to you?" Itsuki blinked. "Subaru-san, I'm trying. Is that so hard to understand?" She lifted Ryoko's hand, studying it hard with her dark brown eyes. "Lovely long fingers. Graceful and agile. A bit callused, but that just means they're more experienced. Tell me, Ryoko. Have you ever played piano?"

Ryoko didn't know how to answer. 'Well, yes, I did… but that was a long time ago. A very long time ago. How would she know that?' Itsuki didn't know whether Ryoko's silence was a negative or an affirmative, but she dragged Ryoko out of the cafeteria anyway, pulling her towards her dorm room.

The metal door slid open, and Ryoko's blue eyes widened at how many different musical things there were. There was a violin case, an old 20th century record player, a keyboard, and different little instruments that seemed to be only picked up as collector's items displayed around the room. For the first time in a while, Ryoko spoke, "Are you obsessed with music or something?"

Itsuki laughed a bit. "You could say that. I started learning sheet music and violin when I was eight. I just fell in love with it, and have been addicted ever since." She walked over to the keyboard and switched it on. "Let's just leave it grand for now… that's what it was, apparently, when I was playing with it last. There we go!" The keyboard beeped, startling Ryoko a bit. The purple haired pilot looked at her. "You never answered me, did you ever play piano before?"

Ryoko looked at the ground. "…I did… a long time ago. When I was five. I dropped it when my mom died though." Itsuki nodded.

"A shame. Yes, I did know that you played. I just wanted to know how skilled you were before you actually sat down to anything." Itsuki realized that Ryoko was still standing outside. "You can come in, Subaru-san."

Ryoko stepped into the room, the door sliding shut behind her. 'Trapping me.' She shook her head, and her next thought popped out of her mouth before she could stop it. "I bet you don't call me Ryoko because you think I hate you, right?"

Itsuki didn't even blink. "You've obviously been talking to Jiro no baka." She sighed. "Well, in a way." She just left it at that. Ryoko wouldn't let the subject fall again. She had been meaning to talk to the flirtatious pilot for weeks now, and this was the perfect time. "Well, I don't, ok? You just freaked me out, with the flirting and all."

"I only 'freaked you out'? Freaking you out is what made you scream at me and tell me to leave you the fuck alone?" Ryoko was started to regret not dropping the subject when Itsuki did. "Look, Ryoko. You must not be used to the idea of a girl trying to win your affections. God knows I haven't gotten it in a while! But, goddammit, I just found you at a random search! You picture intrigued me, your records astounded me, and, hell, your past made me fall in love, okay? Excuse me for caring Ryoko!" With the last sentence said, Itsuki turned away from the green-haired pilot. 'I think I'm going to be sick.'

Ryoko did the only thing she could think of. Her shaky hand grasped Itsuki's shoulder, and caressed it a bit. 'I have no idea what I'm doing.' Itsuki turned a bit, and saw the apology floating in Ryoko's water-blue eyes. Itsuki smiled, a real smile. A thought streaked through Ryoko's brain, and she just couldn't pin it down fast enough. 'Another real smile… She's actually pretty attractive when she does that- SHIT! Did I just think that?'

Itsuki patted Ryoko's cheek, as if she could read her mind. 'Yes, you did.' She pointed toward the bench in front of the keyboard. The two girls slowly approached it and sat down. Itsuki cleared her throat.

"Okay, you must have forgotten a lot of things in all this time, since you did say you haven't played in fifteen years, so we'll start with something easy-" Before Itsuki could start demonstrating where one's fingers should be, Ryoko's right hand drifted up, three of her callused fingers hitting the keys, giving a light tone. Itsuki's purple eyebrows knit as Ryoko closed her eyes, her right hand seeming to embrace the keys, continuing the little melody that seemed so natural. 'Natural… because I wrote it.' She continued, her left hand positioning itself at the other end of the piano. Itsuki stood, giving Ryoko all the elbowroom she would need. 'It sounds almost like a nursery rhyme rhythm… but much deeper and with more meaning.'

Ryoko finally lost all touch with herself, surrendering to the instrument, giving it the melody in her head, the song that had been hiding within her for years. Itsuki watched in awe. 'She knows something this complex… she knew it when she was only five? She's like a prodigy… that just gave up. How sad… or maybe only her tone is making me sad.'

Ryoko slowed down the song, coming to its end. 'I wrote that so long ago… When I was becoming a tomboy. And my dad started to hate me… I don't think I've actually played it for someone.' Ryoko's eyes opened, but stayed focused on the keys. 'And I just… did it.' She turned around and looked for a reaction from the other girl.

Itsuki's jaw was slack, as if she didn't expect that little outburst of creativity. Her eyes told all of her emotions, loving envy, friendly happiness. Itsuki blinked a bit, trying to get any tears out of her eyes before speaking. "Ryoko… have you been hiding that talent all this time? Where did you learn to play like that? I have never, in all my days, heard that piece played… let alone so beautifully." She smiled very slightly, as if in total and complete awe, or absolute ecstasy.

"…My mother taught me how to play. And… you never heard that piece before because… I wrote it." Itsuki's eyes got bigger. "You wrote… that… when you were five!?!" 'She really is a prodigy… at least, at portraying her feelings with music.'

Ryoko nodded. Itsuki's smile grew. The purple-haired pilot walked over to her closet, and pulled out a plastic covered blue dress. "Subaru Ryoko, I'm going to enter you into the contest. You have no excuse. You may actually win."

~*~

(Jun and Omoikane Interlude)

"'Oh, Jun-kun, please! I need to enter the contest to prove to everyone that I can be a good attractive captain, and I need a song to sing!' And of course, me, the pushover, agrees to write the damn thing…" Jun seemed to be slaving over an old piece of music, writing lyrics to go with the seemingly antique music style. "Then I try to make myself write the thing so it fits her, oh my GOD, what was I thinking…"

Beep. Pause. Beep beep beep. Jun glanced over at Ruri's console as she watched the computer's window reveal typed kana a bit slower than if it was something already written. 'So… Omoikane's writing a song for Ruri too. And people say unconditional love is dead.' Jun turned back to the writing before him. 'Be myself and… WHAT?'

Ruri had heard Jun complaining about writing a song for Yurika, so of course Omoikane heard. Ruri sighed in anguish and Omoikane entered her and started writing a song for her to sing. She had to smile a bit at the computer though. He really wanted her to win, more than she even wanted to try, so she couldn't help observing this insanity.

Omoikane, though, was writing his own emotions, instead of a song that worked with how Ruri thought. 'Maybe when she sings it, she'll see the other meaning in it!' Ruri heard this thought though. 'Omoikane-chan thinks he's in love with me. That is obvious.'

"Idiots."

~*~

(Hikaru and Uribatake Interlude)

Hikaru smoothed out her long black skirt, smiling at how it contrasted with her pale yellow shirt. 'It may not be my best dress, but it fits my song. At least… I think it does, and that's what matters.' She ran a hand through her layered red hair once more before glancing at the stage manger, who was just one of the mechanics. He gave her a thumbs-up, signaling that, as Prospector was talking, as soon as he finished she could walk out to the opening notes to her song.

"Welcome to the First Star Beauty Pageant and our search for our Captain of Tomorrow! We'll start the contest with our very own, Amano Hikaru, singing… 'Deliver Me' by Sarah Brightman!" announced Prospector. 'My cue.'

The first deep notes began to play, and Hikaru took slow steps towards the mike from backstage, the silver bracelets of her bare ankles tinkling. She stood in front of the microphone, her head bent as the opening notes ended and the moment for her to sing approached. Her head lifted elegantly, the lights brining out the different colors in her hair as she began to finally sing.

"Deliver me… Out of my Sadness." The very first line caught Uribatake's attention. "Deliver me… From all of the Madness." 'Holy shit… This isn't just a favorite song pick, this has a meaning.' "Deliver me… Courage to guide me." 'Fuck fuck fuck…' "Deliver me… Strength from inside me..." 'I think I know her too well, now.'

Hikaru tilted her head, the lights catching her glasses, make them seem silver too. Her hair seemed to just move by itself, as if a draft came in. "All of my life… I've been in hiding…" Izumi smiled, listening backstage. 'Yes, in fact, you have. And…' "Wishing there was someone just like you…" 'You've been doing that too.' "Now that you're here… now that I've found you…" Hikaru's brown eyes slipped closed. 'Uri-P. Think Uri-P.' "I know that you're the one to pull me through..."

Uribatake's jaw dropped. Akatsuki glanced at the mechanic. "Don't get all biased, now." Uribatake didn't even seem to hear him. 'Shit, man, I didn't think it would be this bad… I mean, I know she lied, but still…' "Deliver me… loving and caring…" 'Okay, we've discovered she's singing about me, now what?' "Deliver me… giving and sharing…" 'Though those don't seem to describe me at all…' "Deliver me… the cross that I'm bearing…" '…I see now.'

Izumi saw realization come into the head mechanic's eyes. She tried not to laugh hysterically. 'I knew this song was perfect.' "All of my life… I was in hiding… Wishing there was someone just like you… Now that you're here… now that I've found you… I know that you're the one to pull me through…"

Hikaru's eyes reopened, and she seemed to be daring Uribatake to interpret the song's meaning, with her eyes. "Deliver me… deliver me…" 'If you want me, come and get me, Uri-P.' "Oh… Deliver me…" A gust seemed to come from nowhere, flapping her black skirt and the ends of her yellow shirt. It teased her hair, and made her seem like a sprite or some other kind of fae. "All of my life… I was in hiding… wishing there was someone just like you… Now that you're here… Now that I've found you… I know that you're the one to pull me through…" Her mouth closed, and the wind seemed to get a bit stronger. People were started to get a little frightened at the girl on the stage, but she seemed so serene… "Deliver me… Oh… Deliver me…" It calmed as the last notes played, her hair falling back into place as she whispered the last line. "Won't you deliver me?"

Uribatake was in so much awe; he wondered just why he hadn't snatched up this girl when she first came onto the Nadesico. 'She… she wants me to chase her. She wants me to take her up and make her mine. I think… I'd have to tie up some loose threads… like Ayuko and Genji… but…'

~*~

(Izumi, Hikaru, and Inez Interlude)

Izumi was just changing into her clothes, a white shirt, a black vest, and brown slacks, when Hikaru changed back into her uniform and had come to bug her. "You're really gonna do it, Izumi-chan?"

The blue-haired pilot smiled. "I can't let you get one up on me, you know, Hikaru-chan?"

The redhead sighed. "I think Uri-P caught the message. Now it's all a matter of time." Izumi nodded. "I saw, he looked like he was gonna die. Of what, is another story." Picking up her guitar, she caressed the neck and body of the instrument. Itsuki and Ryoko had finally showed up, and were waiting for the How Mei girls to finish dressing. Yurika was trying to get her makeup right and Megumi had lost the needle to her syringe. Erina was fixing her hair and planting glow sticks in her shoes and pockets.

Izumi began tuning her instrument just as the stage manager announced that she was up after the next person. The quiet pilot just nodded. Hikaru sat down next to the pallid pilot. "You're singing about Miss Fressange, aren't you?" Izumi didn't answer. "You are, aren't you?" Hikaru sighed. "I guess I just never make it in there, will I?" She poked Izumi's sternum softly. Izumi shook her head.

"Gomen ne, Hikaru-chan." She gave her a little hug as she heard the person before her finish up. Izumi stood up and fixed her vest a bit. "Well, time to water the flowers." Hikaru nodded and smiled at her best friend.

Izumi walked out onto the stage and sat upon the stool in the center. Akatsuki announced her to… everyone in general. "Okay, we got Maki Izumi playing guitar and signing 'All you Wanted' by Michelle Branch… it seems we have a lot of these early 21st century remakes now, today, don't we, Seiya?" Uribatake didn't answer, because Izumi had begun to strum her guitar, playing the first opening tune. Her elegant lips parted as she moved her mouth closer to the microphone. "I wanted to be like you…" Hikaru was watching from backstage. 'Back then, you did.' "I wanted everything…" 'You were the most popular of all of us, so you also got everything.'" So I tried to be like you…" 'And started making puns when you were sad… This song is about me, she just doesn't know it.' "And I got swept away…"

Izumi closed her red eyes as she continued to move her pick along the strings. "I didn't know that it was so cold and… you needed someone… to show you the way." 'No, Hikaru.' "So I took your hand and…" 'I may have gotten the habit of acting happy when depressed from you, but you have someone to show you the way.' "We figured out that…" 'Yes, it is about Miss Fressange. She's just like you, no matter how much you think about it, and she's in a lot more pain than you.' "When the tide comes I'd take you away…" 'She needs me now, you don't.'

Izumi stood up, kicking the stool behind her, and made it land with a thud. "If you want to, I can save you! I can take you away from here! So lonely inside, so busy out there… and all you wanted was somebody who cares…" Inez watched the younger girl from backstage as well. 'Well well well. Aren't I the special one. A song performed just for me, is it? Or... is it for her?' The blonde glanced at the redhead, giving her an analyzing look, not a jealous one.

Izumi lowered her tone again. "I'm sinking slowly… So hurry hold me!" Hikaru sighed. 'I did when Ken died… and when Rinji died.' "Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on!" 'Well, that, and Rinji… and Ryoko… and now Miss Fressange too.' "Please can you tell me… so I can finally see! Where you go… when you're gone…" 'Okay, I'll give Inez that one. Izumi knows I go into myself, retracting and only releasing my anguish on paper or my laptop.' Hikaru watched the blue haired pilot lifted her head again, putting more power into the next verse.

"If you want to, I can save you! I can take you away from here! So lonely inside, so busy out there, and all you wanted was somebody who cares…" Izumi's eyes zipped to where both Inez and Hikaru stood, then back. 'So, they came to watch. Just as well.'

"All you wanted was somebody who cares! If you need me you know I'll be there! … Oh… yeah… If you want to, I can save you… I can take you away from here! So lonely inside, so busy out there, and all you wanted was somebody who cares…"

She slowed the plucking of the strings a bit, ending her song. "Please can you tell me…? So I can finally see… Where you go when you're gone…"

~*~

Itsuki began to pace back and forth in front of the couch in the dressing room. Ryoko was sitting calmly on the couch, a little comfortable in Itsuki's blue dress. Itsuki kept patting her violin case as she walked past it. She also seemed to be rambling. "Ryoko, are you sure you can play that song just as well as you did for me?" "Yes, Itsuki." "Because if you can't, I understand perfectly, I mean, it's kind of nerve-racking on stage, I know." "It's okay, Itsuki. If I mess up, oh well. I'm not really looking forward to playing it anyway." "I understand. Being judged and all. I don't have a problem-" "It seems you are the one with the problem, Itsuki."

Itsuki stopped pacing. She sat down on the couch next to Ryoko, smoothing out her short black skirt as she sat. "I don't have a problem with my performance, Ryoko. My song won me first place in the junior high school talent show before I transferred to pilot school, and I went to a music school. I predict I'll get in at least the top three places. No. I'm worried about your performance." Brown met blue. "You haven't performed before anyone, have you?"

Ryoko shook her head a bit, feeling once again uncomfortable. "That's not bad, though, is it?" Itsuki gave her a smile, one of her real ones. 'I'm so happy… I can share my love for music with the person I fell in love with.' "No. Of course not. But that's why I'm worried. Don't let anyone get you down if you mess up."

Ryoko heard the ending notes of the How Mei girls' song, "Delicious Island" play. "You're up next, aren't you?" Itsuki nodded, her long purple hair bouncing against it's restrains. Her hair was far too long, so she usually pulled it into a loose ponytail when she played her favorite instrument. She stood and picked up her violin case. She picked a piece of lint off of her black tights just as Yurika, dressed in her own dress for performing, walked up to her.

"Good luck to you, Kazamo-san. I go after you, so I'll be rooting for you!" The Captain smiled, feeling happy for the both of them. Itsuki smiled indecently at her. "Oh, don't you worry captain. I don't need luck." She started to walk past her. "I'd keep your luck to yourself, if I were you. That way…" She reached the curtain before turning and facing the confused girl again. "You'll have a chance against me." Itsuki walked out on stage before Yurika could respond.

Uribatake glanced at the program to announce her. "Okay, looks like Kazamo Itsuki's performing… 'The Betrayal'?"

"Ah," answered the violinist, fixing her chin on the instrument as she situated herself to play her piece. When she had quiet, she began to play. At first her tone seemed mysterious, then it became sad as she repeated it.

She began to whisper, softly, as not to move her jaw too much. "Now then, the lilacs' wind you feel, it's not it's home… Burning idea, public response, the hazy water surface's home. The emptiness of the dream world puzzles those in the world… It's a fast time, such of the perfection of the flower." She just continued to play her sad tune, though her background music had someone playing piano with her. It repeated, growing softer, as if it was going to end right there. Her right hand seemed to glow as it caressed the bow. She pushed it again, playing the last note.

She stopped, opened her eyes, and looked at the judges. Akatsuki and Uribatake seemed to be a bit dazed, as if her music grasped them and made them lose sight of themselves. 'Good. That's what I'm best at doing.' She slipped her black tights off, then lifted her black dress over her head to reveal little red bikini. She smiled indecently as the judged got a hold of them and wrote down their own thoughts.

~*~

(Jun and Yurika Interlude)

Itsuki walked backstage, still in her bikini and carrying her clothes. Ryoko seemed in awe, as if she couldn't believe the girl on stage was the person coaching her. Yurika bounced up to Itsuki, telling her she did a wonderful job. She seemed to be still a bit shaky after Itsuki's words and performance, as if she was losing confidence. Itsuki smiled at her, a fake smile. "Oh, it's no big deal, Captain, I'm sure you'll place high." The stage manager signaled Yurika; it was her turn. "Good luck, Captain." Yurika couldn't put her finger on it, but she was sure that smile meant something completely different.

Yurika walked out on stage, and instantly heard Jun enthusiastically announcing her. "She's the queen of outer space, the fire maiden of Mars! And here she is! Misumaru Yurika singing 'Being Myself'!"

Yurika smiled at her best friend as the upbeat song began to play. She kept her green eyes closed until it was her cue to sing. "Throughout… the search… for characteristics… like these emotions…" She turned her head, smiling at the audience of cardboard cutouts Jun set up. "Unexpected sensations… fill the emptiness… in my chest." She reached out with one hand, copying the movements of a girl she saw in a two-hundred-year-old anime as a girl. "What kind… of jewel's color… fades to… this extent?" Her eyes slipped closed again as she sang the next line. "These pure feelings… must been inside me, right?" Her eyes opened dramatically, and she lifted her right hand to the left side of her head. "Chasing my dreams… I'll experience smiles and tears…" It moved back to her right, and tapped out a beat on her shoulder. "I know I find them…" She reached up to wipe a fake tears, then she smiled broadly. "More often!" She reached up and started tapping a beat in the air. "But sometimes… I just want to be myself… and feel the wind!" She lowered her hand, then lifted her shoulder a bit. "Let me feel all the squalls up front!" Smiling even bigger, trying to charm the judges a bit, she reached out with her right hand. "From the beginning of tomorrow… let me be myself… Let me find a future… that's no one else's… all my own!"

Her high-heeled foot began tapping to the beat. "Throughout… all the deep devotion… Surely these sensations were here, right?" She leaned her head on her shoulder, giving the audience of cardboard people a sly look. "Hide the end that lives in this place until… My own limits cross over to the advantages…" She gave a pout, as if she was suddenly sad. "Someday… over time… memories change… My heart filling with haze… things pass on to business…" She closed her eyes again, and, with a flick of her wrist, her dress seemed to just fall off, as if it was just lying on her body. It exposed her little pink swimsuit, seeming to be held on by just her form.

"But sometimes… I just want to be myself… and feel the wind!" She started swaying to the music, as if giving herself up to it. "The dark starry sky… staring at its emptiness… From the beginning of tomorrow… let me be myself…" She started bobbing her head as well, making it seem as if she didn't want to follow the normality for dancing while singing. "Only now… my shining is always important!" She spin on one foot, the other kicking in the air. She slowed. "But sometimes… I just want to be myself… and feel the wind… Let me feel all the squalls up front!" She stopped completely. "From the beginning of tomorrow… let me be myself… Let me find a future… that's no one else's… all my own!" She pointed skyward, her song ending.

Jun grinned broadly. He made the cardboard cutouts applaud his love. Yurika smiled at him. Then she ran up and hugged him. "Oh, Jun-kun! Thank you thank you for writing my song!"

~*~

(Ruri and Omoikane interlude)

Omoikane watched as Akatsuki and Uribatake wrote down their votes, smiling and still bobbing their heads to the song. He was somewhat seething. 'Ruri-sama is going to murder the Captain in this contest. I'm sure of it.' Speak of the devil, Ruri came back on the bridge, dressed in one of the dresses she received from Alfred on her journey to see her biological parents. "Omoikane-chan, are you sure you want me to sing this song?"

Omoikane's mechanical heart dropped. "You don't like it, Ruri-sama?" Ruri shook her head. "No, Omoikane-chan, it's fine. But it seems… Never mind."

Omoikane cocked his head in questioning, but dropped the subject. "It's your turn, Ruri-sama. Shall I turn on the window?" Ruri nodded. Omoikane turned the camera on just as Uribatake started announcing her. "Apparently, our very own, Hoshino Ruri entered this contest, singing 'I Want to Be Your Number One' by… Omoikane?" Ruri nodded, and the opening notes began to play. Omoikane crossed his fingers, but felt another presence enter the bridge. 'Aoi Jun, Executive Officer.'

Ruri's cue came. "Not good… these feelings become occasionally daring… This thought… you don't know. However… this moment is difficult… the memory weeping excuses…" She turned her head a bit, thinking to herself as she sang. 'Omoikane did not write this song for me.'

"Your eyes are focused on your sweetheart… Never failing…" She lowered her head a bit, still swimming in her thoughts. 'He wrote it from his heart, his consciousness.' "But for one moment… just one moment… please look at me." She straightened herself. 'I think Omoikane is in love with me.' "If you break your word… it would hurt. I feel sometimes… I desire sometimes… to be under your love, don't you think?"

Omoikane was also reading Ruri's thoughts. 'Yes. You hit the nail on the head, Ruri-sama. I think I am in love with you.' "One day… one day…" 'I thought so.' "In another time… I want to be your number one at that time." 'But I don't know if your emotions are true.'

Omoikane caught this thought, a bit angry. "My emotions are true, Ruri-sama," whispered he. He felt a comforting hand on his shoulder. 'Aoi-san.' He looked up, and when dark blue met light, a hidden message passed between them. 'We're both the same.'

"Our meeting only limits invitations… Only time changes people. How gentle and soft… my love for you is… isn't it? Sooner… in case of a certain hurt… Together… our distance mourns… this accident doesn't extend to preparation of an emptiness..."

She closed her eyes, concentrating on trying to get a communication with Omoikane back. "Cowardice in people is mournful… Like your loneliness… But still, always… Your number one…" 'Omoikane… answer me…' But he didn't.

She opened her eyes and blinked slowly, a bit hurt. But she continued the performance, reaching forward as the fog closed in, allowing her to quickly change into her swimsuit. "If you break your word… it would hurt. I feel sometimes… I desire sometimes… to be under your love, don't you think?"

Ruri raised her head high, making her seem to be singing to the sky. "One day… one day… In another time… I want to be your number one at that time." She closed her eyes as the last notes played, and she heard a tremendous amount of applause from the communications window.

Omoikane smiled. 'She got my meaning… and she might win. I'm so proud of Ruri-sama.'

No sooner than she finished and the window had been closed had the alarms started to go off. Ruri followed her instinct and ran to her station in her swimsuit and sandals.

~*~

Itsuki heard the alarm and followed her own instincts. 'Ryoko? Where are you?' Ruri's face popped up again. "There has been an explosion in front of the ship. Subaru-san has already launched her Aestivalis." People began rushing from the cafeteria to their station on the bridge, while the pilots went straight to the hangar.

There were no words exchanged as five of eight pilots boarded their Aestis and launched immediately, not even asking for permission from the captain. But once they were out, each other them started flooding Ryoko's communications. "Ryoko! Why did you pull out before the alert?" asked Akito, really confused at the situation. Ryoko glared at him, looking angrier at the Jovian missiles than anyone. "It's my job!"

Click. Gai understood. 'Itsuki was teaching her piano… but she doesn't think she can do it.' As if confirming his thoughts, Ryoko cried out, "Fighting and killing are the only things I do well!" Itsuki beeped in. "Not true. Ryoko, I told you before, you play piano like an angel. I meant it."

Ryoko shook her head in response. "I'm not good at it! Nobody wants to hear any of it!" Tears had started to stream down her face. "Okachan said that she would help me find my star, then she died! No one can help me now!" She broke from her hysterics to whisper, "If this is all I can do… I'd be better off not living at all."

This time, Gai beeped in. "Ryoko, please! You're a very good person! You're the best pilot out of all of us!" Ryoko was shocked. Usually people said Akito or Itsuki were the best pilots. "You're the seams that holds the fabric of this team together! We wouldn't know what to do without you!" added Akito, coming between Ryoko and a missile. 'She's already lost an arm on her Aesti, she shouldn't have to deal with all of this at once.'

Hikaru took her turn to comfort her best friend. "Fighting is all right if you're fighting for friends!" "And family…" interjected Izumi. Ryoko's crying stopped. 'Izumi and Hikaru are my family…' Flashes of them all defending each other through school came. 'We've fought for each other, against society, since we were kids…' Itsuki came in at that point. "Ryoko, I'll help you find something else. But for now, this is the best skill you can have."

Click. Ryoko nodded, the other pilots taking out the other missiles. 'One day, I'll find something else… but for now…' Akatsuki beeped in. "Hey, Ryoko, why don't you come back and perform, it's your turn, you know!" Ryoko turned to Itsuki's window. She smiled. 'Don't worry, I'll still help you.'

~*~

Uribatake couldn't believe it. "Ryoko entered the contest… heh, her girlfriend must have put her up to it." He cleared his throat, put down her card, and read it into the microphone. "And our last contestant is Subaru Ryoko… playing… what?" He had trouble reading it, looking over and under his glasses in attempt to figure it out.

"It's called 'Regret'," answered the green haired pilot, standing nervously next to the piano. "And I wrote it." Uribatake nodded. "What she said! Ryoko, go ahead." Ryoko bowed, then sat down a bit uncomfortable on the bench. A whispered silence grasped the room as the lights dimmed. Ryoko glanced at Itsuki. The purple-haired pilot gave her a thumbs up, indicating that, even though she was scared, she had a chance. Ryoko swallowed hard, and her right hand came up to push the keys.

The hushed silence stilled, and it seemed to concentrate solely on those three notes. Ryoko played the next part, still with her right hand only. 'Don't play for them. Play for yourself.' She saw Izumi and Hikaru standing on the other end of the stage, hanging on to every note. She played the last part again, messing up a bit while she had trouble concentrating. 'Don't concentrate. Give yourself to the music. Let it consume you.' She played the next part, making it sound a bit like a lullaby or a nursery rhyme. She repeated the entire thing, not messing up at all, slowly catching on to everything Itsuki said… no, what her mother said… no, it was her instinct.

She raises her left hand with grace, and pushed the next keys, accenting the lighter tones she was playing with deeper ones. Her mood turned from nervous child, to depressed expert.

Hikaru's first thoughts was back to their school days. 'She wrote this song after her mother died, then she dropped playing the piano. She… wrote it before she knew everything we would end up going through.' She looked up at Izumi, towering over her. Izumi was lost in her own thoughts. 'She's adding more emotion to it as she goes along, pushing her anger, her hatred, her sadness into her work. Hikaru and I do the same…'

Ryoko finally got a bit of a beat going, and she repeated the deep notes. Then she continued, making it sound like the end, or the beginning, of a long story she was telling. Her eyes closed, and she didn't see the keys. She felt them, and not with her fingers. 'With my memory.' She hit the lowest notes of the song. 'This is for my mother dying.' She hit high and low and the same time, not even remembering that she was playing for a group. She did it again, a bit softer this time. 'This is for me becoming a tomboy.' She kept playing the soft notes, feeling again the helplessness. 'This is for my father becoming a mean old bastard.' She went back to hitting high and low. 'Being teased, being told to not cause fights, getting my ass kicked… all of this and more.'

Her notes became a bit happier, a bit faster, lighter. 'Hikaru and Izumi are my saviors.' Her tone resembled that of an organized dance song, like a waltz. 'They saw my inside self before anything else. They didn't cut me off because I was a tomboy. They embraced me because I was different.' Her playing began to slow, going back to being a sad nursery rhyme, a depressing lullaby. It slowed so much; it became only single notes, one at a time. Then she played the very last part. Three deep notes, all at the same time. 'This is for my life.' She didn't even see the lights come back on, nor hear the applause she got. She also didn't see Izumi and Hikaru nearly in tears.

She didn't see Itsuki smiling serenely, happy to listen to the incredible song, even if this would be the last time she heard it.

~*~

'Third place overall. I got third place overall. I tied with Izumi. Izumi's been playing guitar for years… and I tied with her. And Itsuki was right, she got second place, tying with Hikaru-chan, the Captain, and Megumi. …Did I know I was going to place high? No, of course not.' Ryoko blinked slowly, trying to reach for sleep, but it running off, chased away by light and constant movement. She grunted irritably, turning on her side. Hikaru noticed this, leaning over her top bunk. "Gomen ne, Ryoko-chan. I'll be quieter."

Izumi came out of the bathroom, wringing out her hair. "Hikaru-chan, you should go to sleep now anyway. We have a battle tomorrow afternoon, and we should be well rested."

Hikaru sighed, gathering her papers. "Yeah, yeah…" She stuck them all in her little cubby, then actually laid down, sticking her headphones on. Izumi turned off the light. She glanced at Ryoko, finally catching up with sleep. 'I don't think there will be any more nightmares.' She pulled back the curtain on her bottom bunk, and went to bed.

~*~

(Ariko and Rachiku Interlude)

Ariko came back to his new room to find a blinking message. He himself blinked as he read the kana. '"Call us immediately!" Definitely Okasama and Otosama. More likely Okasama.' He sighed, not even bothering to change out of his blue uniform before he messaged his own house.

He didn't expect his younger brother Rachiku to answer the message. "Well, Oniisama, I didn't expect you to be calling so late. Shame on you." Ariko glared at the blonde on the screen. "Where are Okasama and Otosama?"

Rachiku shrugged. "I told them to go to bed. They have been up two days straight worried sick about you, Oniisama."

"And just what's it to you, Rachiku? Trying to convince Okasama and Otosama that you should be heir, since the two at the top are both drafted on the Nadesico?"

"Oh, is THAT what you've been doing?" countered the blonde prince, wrinkling his nose. "I see that now. Such a grungy uniform. Not at our standards at all. And just what if I am convincing them? You never wanted the responsibility, and neither did Oneesama."

Ariko didn't have an answer for that. "Tell our parents… that I'm now a mechanic-in-training on the Nadesico. We're entering the Battle of the Indian Ocean as a rear guard tomorrow afternoon. Tell them not to worry, either. The crew is nice. And… I love them."

Rachiku sniffed snobbishly. "What makes you think I'll actually tell them all that?" Blue met blue through a communications screen. "Because it's the right thing to do," explained the older as he closed the communications window.

TBC…

~*~A/N: Are you happy now? Wasn't Ryoko so huggable during her performance? ^^ Anyway, how did you like this chapter? It was stewing in my brain since I started this fic, and this is the result. Hope you like it! And I just kinda threw in the end, but I was also working on the characters of Ariko and Rachiku just as long. ^^ Anyway, the next chapter may be much shorter, since the next chapter will have NO PLOT! Whee! No, really, it'll be the morning and two hours after lunch, just following the pilots. So, it'll just be a fun chapter. As always, don't forget to review me!