Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Breaking the Habit ❯ Chapter 13: I don�t know how I got this way ( Chapter 13 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Title: Breaking the Habit
Author: DeityOfDeath
Archive: Yes please...
Pairings: Naruto/Sasuke, Naruto/Itachi
Category: Drama, romance, slash, yaoi, Smut, Mpreg
rating: NC-17/R
Spoilers: Most likely.
Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Rape, Non-con, Mpreg, Angst SPOILERS!!!!!!

Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Naruto or its chars. They are property of major companies.

Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review!

The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Breaking the Habit" by Linkin Park.

Mid January - Naruto is raped
Early-mid February - Naruto is back in Konoha, Sasuke makes a move.
mid/late February - Naruto learns of his pregnacy
March - Naruto moves out of his apartment
April - 4mths along, picked house.
May — 5mths along, Itachi appears. Sasuke and Naruto make amends.
June — 6mths along, Sasuke and others on a mission.
July — 7 mths, still no sign of Sasuke.
Mid July — Naruto still trying to face Sasuke intimately, Some secret plots are coming out….

August - 8mths along and has moved into a house built on Uchiha land with Sasuke. Still no sex with Sasuke.

Late August - Labor has started and Sasuke is on a mission

August 28th - Kizuna is born at 10am.

Breaking the Habit

Chapter 13: I don't know how I got this way

It is a small miracle that I've survived as long as I have and an even bigger miracle that I found those around me who call me friend, and never did I dream I'd find one to call me lover and yet I have and with that alone I could say I would die happy and complete and then by yet another miracle I find myself with a son. A son who somehow makes my life more complete than I thought it ever would be.

I lay back and watched him nurse from his bottle, blue eyes wide and starring around him as he took his meal. I wonder if my mother felt the same awe and amazement when she held me, or if she found every moment of my life and every movement, sound or smell as intriguing as I do. Kizuna, my Kizuna, with his thick black hair and piercing blue eyes; a perfect mix of Uchiha and Uzumaki genetics if ever I could have imagined one.

I found myself enamored with him and lost all track of time when it concerned him which is easy to do when a newborn is concerned. When they aren't sleeping, they're eating and when they're not eating or sleeping they're dirtying another diaper which means that you're changing them and when others visit they give a small respite; a time in which to catch a breath or more often than not, a nap.

I don't have energy for much else as of late. I sleep, I eat, I go to the bathroom and then I care for my little one as he does much of the same.

I believe Sasuke finds himself just as enamored if not more so. One day, perhaps we shall have a child of our but not anytime soon. My body still needs healing in more than one way.

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Kizuna is now a month old and has already been a source of amusement for our friends and peers. The elders have left me alone for the time being. I'm pretty sure Tsunade-bachan has something to do with that.

I am able to sit up easily again and walk and even do my usual training exercises which not only has helped me gain back some of my figure but has given me something to do while Kizuna naps. I have also regained my quick healing ability. Sakura is pretty sure Kyuubi's chakra was focused on Kizuna during my pregnancy allowing for his survival but unfortunately causing me to become so sick after his conception.

Sasuke has been given a few missions since Kizuna's birth but most of them have taken place within a day's reach of the village and no further. I'm pretty sure that's because Itachi has been sighted within the parameters of the village. I have yet to see him but I can't help but get the feeling that I'm being watched, that feeling that causes an itch or burn between your shoulders.

I usually shrug off those feelings.

Kizuna is a bright child; I wonder and worry about him and his future since his birth. His eyes hold a great deal of thought and intelligence and I wonder if it is an Uchiha trait or whether it was one his father strictly possessed.

He has conquered movement of his hands and arms and seems to now focus a lot of attention on his feet and legs, kicking them and wiggling them, as if testing their use or trying to discover just what that use is. He has also made use of the many dangly, noisy and bright colored baby toys that were gifted to him by mine and Sasuke's many friends. Although it seems that he is just as entertained by the silly faces we make. He really enjoys Sasuke's silly faces the most and I have to say that I find it just as enjoyable watching that Teme making some of the most unusual faces, especially when he doesn't think I'm watching.

Sasuke seems fascinated with Kizuna's hands and feet, commenting on how small they are and how much of a grip “our son” has. He is every part the proud papa. Those little hands really do have a grip and Sasuke can testify to that since those little fists love to grab at his long bangs, makes me grateful that I keep my hair so short.

Kizuna does tend to cry a lot but according to Ba-chan that's normal, I'm usually up at odd hours to change and feed him so that Sasuke will have enough rest for his missions which are also during odd hours. I silently wish for the day when Kizuna can start talking so I don't have to deal with the crying as much but Ba-chan also said that after a while I'll be able to tell what his cries mean and I won't feel as stressed when it comes to answering them.

***********Kizuna 2 months old****************************

Kizuna is growing, a few inches longer and a few pounds heavier. He is quite the snuggler, when he's tired he won't nap unless we're curled up together, in a warm spot. I find myself hugging him close, rubbing his back or rubbing arms and legs most of the time, whether for his comfort or my own and most of the time unknowingly. This whole parent thing seems natural.

Kizuna loves to sleep on my chest, either on his back and snuggled against the crook of my arm or on his belly with his head against my neck or chin.

When he's awake he works on keeping his head up on his still strengthening neck which seems like a tough job, I often wonder how such a small neck holds up such a big head. I asked Sasuke if big heads were an Uchiha trait, he didn't seem very amused but I was.

Kizuna has also begun to make sounds. He coos and gurgles and we find ourselves repeating the sounds much to Kizuna's amusement.

**************** Kizuna 3 months old *********************

I've seen his first smile. Sasuke says he has my smile, he says it's big and doofy but I took it as the compliment it was. I think my genes in the Uchiha line might just improve it a bit. I always thought they looked too serious anyway.

I've started taking Kizuna outside and he seems captivated by the sounds and sights. At first he seemed antsy and unsure but after a day in the cool weather with lots of attention he seemed to suck it up. It has now become the highlight of our week to go visit everyone and go shopping.

When we're home and I'm busy doing chores I set Kizuna on the floor and when I check on him it amuses me to watch him lifting his chest off the floor. I have a feeling he'll be up on his knees and crawling soon. I still need to “baby proof” the house.

***************** Kizuna 4 months old **********************

I swear Kizuna has us wrapped around his pudgy little fingers. He cries and we come running and once in a while he'll stop long enough to see if we're coming. He has quite the tantrum too but it doesn't help that Sasuke spoils him rotten. He also has begun to show his happiness as much as his unhappiness. He smiles when he sees us and giggles at the raspberries I blow on his tummy or when Sasuke lift's him into the air. He is also quite fond of Akamaru, his little face lights up when the come to visit.

He has recently become the grabber. He grabs mine and Sasuke's hair as often as it's in reach which is quite often for Sasuke since his bangs hang so low. He giggles delightfully when he's captured the raven locks.

My burden has lessened some when it comes to holding or entertaining Kizuna. He can sit up against pillows and when he's not sitting I am able to lay a blanket on the floor where he practices sitting up while on his belly, strengthening those pudgy arms and bouncing and rolling here and there. I have a little mobile that often keeps him entertained while I do household chores. It plays music and has bright colorful animals and shapes.

***************** Kizuna 6 months old **********************

He is getting so big and is quite the active little one. He's constantly babbling and Sasuke swears he's trying to say `Da da'. I humor him as much as I do Kizuna. Sasuke Uchiha has become quite the proud papa and I'd have to say Kizuna is just as proud and happy to have him as his `Da da'. Every time Sasuke comes home from a mission Kizuna babbles joyously and gives this gum filled smile.

Kizuna is no longer just on formula. We've been trying various baby foods and cereals and he seems to be a big fan of banana. He's also been taking longer naps thanks to a fuller belly.

He loves his plush teddy that his Uncle Iruka brought him and swings the poor thing around with both hands. When he seems restless I pull out a few of the picture books I've started picking up from the store on our days out and read to him. He pats the book and watches the pictures and giggles at the animal sounds I make, though I think its better when Sasuke reads and does the sounds.

***************** Kizuna 8 months old **********************

Kizuna is now crawling like a little champ. We were excited to see how mobile he had become and then we realized that it was also time to baby proof the house even more. Especially thanks to one incident where little Kizuna had found one of Sasuke's stray shuriken on the floor and tried to eat it. He was none too happy at having his would be toy taken away. We replaced the weapon with his favorite teddy and blanket and he settled down.

He has this new infatuation with dropping things when being carried or in his highchair. I'm not sure if he likes watching them fall or me picking them up. He's also said his first word which was Dada much to Sasuke's happiness, now Sasuke's trying to teach him to call me Mama. I'll kill Sasuke if Kizuna starts calling me that. He also says No and pouts when he hears it.

He has begun playing hide-n-seek and gets especially excited when playing with Kakashi Sensei, but then again he cheats using his ninjutsu but Kizuna enjoys every moment of it and cries “more” repeatedly until Kakashi wears himself out.

When entertaining Kizuna I have now discovered that pots and pans with a wooden spoon does the trick. It's loud and noisy but it keeps him occupied while I do the dishes and start dinner.

***************** Kizuna 10 months old *********************

Kizuna has finally pulled himself up into a standing position and uses any furniture available to help him get to his destination which is usually something I don't want him getting into but we're proud all the same. He works hard to get to his “father” when he comes through the door after a hard days work. I find this adorable and I found his crying fit as Sasuke; his “Da da”, leaves in the morning cute the first four times, now it has become quite the hassle. Poor Sasuke ends up having to leave earlier than usual and as quietly as possible so as not to wake our little drama queen.

It's not just Sasuke. I tried leaving and letting Sakura and Lee baby sit the munchkin so that I could run a quick errand and I had to endure the sounds of his crying halfway down the block. What surprised me was that he was still awake and sniffling when I had come home an hour later. I had talked to Ba-chan and a few others and found that this is not uncommon but I couldn't do it again. The thought of having him that upset at having us gone was too much to bear. Perhaps I am spoiling him, but he is mine to spoil. So needless to say, he comes with on all my errands so I have had to pull an extended leave on missions for the time being.

He is getting so big. Sasuke and I started a height wall for him finally. We're using the wall in his nursery, which he rarely stays in. His first line has been marked with black marker with his name and age. I look forward to adding more lines.

Not only has he gained height and weight but he is beginning to gain his motor skills and now occasionally drinks from a frog sippy cup. He is also eating at the table in a highchair and can feed himself thanks to finger foods. He enjoys cereal and porridge and for snacks he chews on cookies and bananas.

***************** Kizuna 11 months old *********************

The little brat has us wrapped around those pudgy fingers. He knows that Sasuke is his “Da da” and I am his “Too-san”. He says both quite often but they are usually followed by grunts and pointing or crying. He has become quite the bossy little brat, but we don't help any. I believe saying that Kizuna is spoiled is an understatement.

He is padding his way through the house now and baby gates have become my best friend.

His birthday is coming soon and Sasuke has already started planning. I believe he has already bought the invites and is readying them to be sent out. I have a feeling were about to find out just how spoiled our little one will or has become.

To Be Continued……

Sorry it took so long. It has been a long and horrible year. I'll try to update within the next month but I keep getting emails about other stories, so I would like to update a chapter to each story before coming back to this one. Keep reading and thanks for all of your reviews and encouragement.

Kat