Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Everyone Else is Doing IT ❯ An Evening at the Hyuuga's ( Chapter 5 )

Everyone Else is Doing IT

(part 5)

SasuNaru

 

Naruto and Sasuke bond unconventionally over XXX Yaoi fanfiction. Neji turns out to have an interesting talent or two. Gaara is Gaara. Psychotic and unpredictable, with a penchant for black.

 

(((Thank you to everyone who reviewed!)))

 

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Neji was calm and a bit deadpan on the walk to the Hyuuga estate, Naruto observed, but that was typical of him. Boredom, arrogance, nonchalance… they all fit Neji to a T. His face was blank as they strolled down the street, but he kept pace with Naruto, not bothering to hide the fact that he knew this blonde, shivering, half-naked wreck that was walking next to him. It was decent of him.

 

“S-s-so, Nej-ji, w-what brought y-you to m-my s-s-side of t-t-town?” Naruto made conversation through chattering teeth. He hugged his arms across his chest. His flesh was cold. He was beginning to seriously doubt that the stolid Hyuuga was the stalker. Wouldn't he show more than a flyspeck of interest in him if that were the case?

 

Neji paused, looked at him with critical eyes, then began to untie and unwind his loose, white gi top. Naruto stared at the white bandages circling Neji's ribs and up over one shoulder as the dark haired boy shrugged out of the garment. Pale eyes met his, and a shock ran through him at their quiet intensity. He stood stupidly as Neji draped his top over his bare shoulders.

 

“T-T-Thanksss.”

 

The tall boy nodded, and resumed walking.

 

Naruto noticed people staring, and he scampered to catch up to him. Could someone like Neji really be the stalker? He was so… unemotional. Distant. True, he used to also be hostile. But since when did lack of hostility make you write gay fanfiction? Naruto shook his head. And it was actually well-written, if he let himself admit it. Besides that first story there were plenty of others, and both of them were portrayed differently every time. So he was a total uke in the first one… but he wasn't always. (He looked up the word uke after Sasuke mentioned it and discovered that it was the Japanese term for the submissive person, and seme meant the dominant person. Though sometimes it referred to personality traits too, and not just who was on the top or bottom in bed.)

 

Naruto glanced at Neji, and tried to picture him writing anything involving two boys in a liplock. He couldn't do it.

 

“S-So, I hear you w-write poetry?” Naruto couldn't fathom that one either.

 

“I… dabble,” Neji said stiffly.

 

“C-Can I r-read some?” Maybe he could compare the writing style so he could disprove this once and for all, and move on to finding the real stalker.

 

“I'd rather you not.”

 

Hmn. Neji looked mildly uncomfortable. You could tell from the tiny crease that formed just beneath one eye. “W-Why?”

 

“They aren't very good.”

 

They arrived at gate to the Hyuuga estate. Neji pressed his fingertip to a small box outside the gate, and a latch could be heard clicking open. Naruto wondered briefly if you had to go through this process in order to get back out again.

 

“Neji-sama!” A cluster of servants swarmed them as entered. They were all female, attractive, and in ages ranging 20-35. It looked suspiciously like a harem.

 

Neji pulled Naruto along by the arm, trying to break free of them, a long-suffering expression on his face.

 

“Neji-sama! Can I get anything for you?”

 

“Neji-sama, who is this?” one teased.

 

“Oh look how cute he is! Such bright hair!”

 

They chattered excitedly.

 

“Oh, and the bluest eyes!” another added, catching him under the chin and tilting his face up so they could all see.

 

“What odd marks, they look like whiskers! How adorable!”

 

Naruto felt his cheeks going hot at all the attention. He felt like a horse being sold off at an auction. Were they going to look at his teeth next??

 

“Oh my, he isn't wearing much under there,” a brave girl tugged the hem of Naruto's borrowed top, giving them all a good flash of skin.

 

“LADIES.”

 

Silence fell like dead leaves as the Hyuuga boy spoke. His voice was imbued with the resonating power of the commanding family. It was not a voice often heard. They looked at him with something just short of awe.

 

“A hot bath and a meal for my friend,” he intoned.

 

“Yes, Hyuuga-sama.”

 

“Right away.”

 

“At once, sir.”

 

“Of course, Neji-sama!”

 

“Right away!” One giggled.

 

Neji swung his arm around Naruto, and pulled him away from the building frenzy. The girls were starting to gather around again. Their excitement was flooding back quicker than he'd expected. He dodged through and around them, breaking in to a run to loose the more persistent ones.

 

They ducked into a space between buildings. Naruto leaned tiredly against a wall. “D-Dude!” he said as he panted for breath. “What's with them?” Ah well, at least his teeth had stopped chattering.

 

“I apologize.”

 

“That's a HAREM. I mean, what, do you get lonely at night?”

 

“That's my uncle's doing.” Neji glared at him. “And you think I can't find my own companionship??” His pale eyes were doing that intensity thing again. “That I would resort to THEM?”

 

“Er… I didn't mean it like that?” Wow, guess there was some emotion under the surface after all. “But- uh… what's wrong with them?” Naruto had to ask. Neji had gotten quite close to him, and it was making him nervous. He swallowed.

 

“They're not y-” Neji groped for words. “They're all wrong.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“And they should not have acted like that towards you, Naruto.” Neji's eyes swam hugely in front of him. Naruto's heart began pumping double time as a hand brushed his cheek. “I truly regret that.” Fingers curved smoothly under his chin, tilting his face upwards and lips were suddenly pressing down upon his.

 

Dimly, Naruto noted that Neji was an excellent kisser.

 

Not so dimly, Naruto noted the fact that they were not alone.

 

“The bath is ready, Neji-sama,” a young woman said with a smirk, then flounced off.

 

“UM - ” Naruto said pointedly, getting back to the fact that Neji had just been snogging him and looked very guilty indeed of being the stalker after all.

 

“Naruto - ” Neji looked at him with surprise and shock very obviously chasing over his face. “You'll have to forgive me - I… don't know what I was thinking.” Neji rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I've been a bit out of sorts.”

 

“Neji - ”

 

“I'll just leave you to your bath then… third building on the right. Excuse me.”

 

And like that, Neji was gone.

 

Naruto stood there for a full 10 minutes, trying to process everything. He was so sure that Neji wasn't the stalker, then he was sure that he WAS. Now, after that scattered apology, he just wasn't sure again. Besides that, he felt vaguely guilty about getting kissed. Was it because of Sasuke? Because if it was, he could forget that right now. If the bastard could lock him outside with the wolves, then he didn't deserve to be liked in the first place. Not that he liked him or anything. It was just hormones. Just like what happened with Neji. Naruto felt a newborn sympathy for the longhaired Hyuuga boy.

 

Naruto nodded to himself, and went in search of the bathing house.

 

---

 

“N-N-Neji?”

 

“Yes, Hinata, what is it?”

 

Neji was in his room pouring over some random haiku books he'd borrowed from the library. He would have just purchased them like he did anything else, but the thought of actually owning poetry books made his skin crawl.

 

“Blackened evening sky

Moon shifting across the darkness

Waiting for the sun”

 

He picked Haiku as there was more of a chance he could fake something simple. Hopefully, he hadn't just wrecked his chance, and there would still be a need to fake this poetry rabble. He read.

 

“In and out

Of the river's mouth

A tongue of sea”

 

That one was… interesting. But, it was translated from another language, so the syllables were off.

 

“Moonless winter night-

a billow of rising fog

hides the distant pines”

 

Let's see… 5:7:5 syllables.

 

Here goes.

 

Neji scribbled onto some paper.

 

The sun in your face

The wind runs through my stunned soul

I am always yours

 

Neji looked at it with disdain. This haiku stuff was harder than it looked.

 

He decided to try something more conventional. According to the book, seasons and nature were popular subjects.

 

A white bird ascends

A flickering in the sky

So bright against blue

 

“Um, Neji,” Hinata said again.

 

“What is it?” He didn't look up from his studies.

 

Silly girl cousin

Think you not that I'm busy?

Hasten yourself to leave me

 

HA. He was getting better already.

 

He looked up at his cousin, still expecting her to say something.

 

“I-I heard s-something… f-from one of the girls.” She meant THEM.

 

“And?”

 

“S-S-She s-said you w-were k-k-k-k-kissing N-N-N-N-Naruto,” she wobbled out.

 

“Don't be ridiculous. Why would Naruto be here?”

 

She shrugged, tears in her eyes. “I thought I s-s-saw him too. Then I h-h-h-heard a l-lot of commotion in the b-b-bath house… I thought m-maybe you-”

 

“The bath house?”

 

She nodded.

 

“What kind of commotion?” It was hard to tell which days his uncle would feel spry enough to goose his hand chosen help.

 

“It sounded l-like the g-girls…giggling, and l-laughing… and I thought I h-h-heard Naruto…”

 

Neji stood abruptly, knocking his pencil onto the floor. “TRAMPS!” He ran out of the room past his shell-shocked cousin.

 

---

 

“H-Hey! Quit it, Nina, or whatever your name is!”

 

“Look Chala, he blushes so adorably!”

 

“I mean it! I do NOT need help washing-”

 

Naruto had found the bathhouse. Unfortunately THEY found him IN the bathhouse. He was naked, trying to hide under the bubbles, while swarms of them teased, poked, and prodded him. All under the guise of assisting him.

 

A few of the girls had hopped into the ridiculously expansive bath, thankfully with at least their under shifts on, and had him cornered in the back. The rest were topside, giggling and gawking.

 

This would perhaps be a situation befitting a fantasy for some, but to Naruto, it was a nightmare. He desperately wanted to bat them away, but he couldn't justify hitting a girl. “Back off!” he warned them. “If you get hurt, I won't be held responsible!”

 

“Nonsense,” one cooed.

 

A hand groped his ass.

 

“SEXY NO JUTSU!” He hollered.

 

A puff of pink smoke fwooshed out, startling the girls. When it cleared, they were all amazed to see a buxom blonde girl with long pigtails.

 

“See?” Girl-Naruto said desperately, “I'm a GIRL.”

 

The two serving girls glanced at each other and shared a smile.

 

“Even better,” the one he thought was Nina said.

 

“I swear to god I'll hit you!!” Girl-Naruto shrieked as they closed in.

 

“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN HERE?!”

 

The bystanders fled as Neji stormed into the bathhouse, scattering like mice. Nina and Chala looked like they wanted to do likewise.

 

“Ninae, Chala, where's Naruto?” he demanded.

 

So, it wasn't Nina after all Naruto thought. He slid down under the water a bit, slightly cowed by a furious Neji.

 

The girls remained silent, lists of punishments they were likely to receive rattling through their thoughts.

 

Neji looked around a moment, then noticed Naruto's pigtailed hair and blue eyes just above the waterline. He strode over to the edge of the bath and looked down at him.

 

“Why are you a girl?” he demanded of the blonde.

 

Bubbles broke the surface as Naruto mumbled a reply from underwater.

 

“Chala, towel,” Neji barked over his shoulder before the girl had made out of the bathhouse.

 

She brought him a towel, and stood at attention, hoping he didn't want any thing else.

 

“You're dismissed.”

 

Neji reached under the water, grabbed Girl-Naruto by the arm, and hauled her out of the water.

 

“What are you doing?!!!” Girl-Naruto screeched, trying to cover up vital parts of anatomy.

 

“It's not like any of that is real,” Neji replied, nonplussed. He thrust the towel at Girl-Naruto.

 

He grabbed at the towel being offered, and smacked Neji's hand away.

 

“No one has ever seen me naked,” the blonde `girl' wailed. “I always had that pink smoke in strategically placed areas!”

 

Neji sighed. It wasn't like he wanted to see Naruto's girl form naked. “Naruto, please turn back to normal.” He couldn't take any more shrieking or crying.

 

Girl-Naruto sniffed and wiped at her eyes. “Henge.”

 

Neji sighed with relief as Naruto became himself once more.

 

“What was the big idea, you lech!” he shouted. “I can't believe you saw my girl form NAKED!”

 

Ah well, at least this he was used to. “Speaking of violation,” he said as Naruto secured the towel tightly about his waist. “What the hell was going on in here?”

 

Naruto turned red and looked vaguely jumpy. “I was accosted,” he muttered.

 

“Explain.”

 

“Well, I was looking for the bathhouse, which took forever with your lousy directions. I finally found it, and after I got in they all found ME.” He shuddered. “I got groped six ways from Sunday, and turned into a girl, hoping that'd cool them off, or at the very least, allow me to hit them. But they kept coming, and I still couldn't hit them since I knew I was still a boy.”

 

Neji sifted through the rambling, and was pretty confident nobody had been able to grope Naruto too thoroughly. He would've made more of a fuss. “I'll make sure uncle punishes them,” he assured the blonde. “Also, you are more than welcome to stay in one of the guest rooms tonight if you are unable to make other arrangements. We can send our locksmith to your apartment in the morning.”

 

“Thanks, Neji.” Naruto beamed at him. He was so thoughtful.

 

Neji nodded gracefully. He tried not to look, but Naruto looked damn sexy in nothing but a towel.

 

---

 

“Can I use your phone?” Naruto asked after one of the tastiest meals he'd ever eaten.

 

“Of course. I have one in my room.”

 

Neji led the way down a darkened hall with high white walls and a gleaming hardwood floor.

 

His room was simple and elegant, with a desk alcove facing the foot of a large bed with a thick black comforter and rich mocha colored sheets. On the far end of the room was a large area of wall to ceiling windows looking out of the zen garden and fish pond.

 

Naruto allowed himself a moment of open-mouthed surprise.

 

Neji handed him a sleek black flip phone. “You can use this,” he said and sat down at his desk, soon becoming enmeshed in the books and papers scattered there.

 

Naruto thought for a moment, then dialed his own cell phone number.

 

“Who's this?” A surly voice answered on the third ring.

 

“Guess who, bastard.”

 

“Naruto?” Sasuke's voice had lost its initial waspishness.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Where are you?”

 

“None of your business.” Naruto felt his irritation at being locked out of the house without his essentials coming back to him.

 

“It is my business! Tell me where you are, Naruto.”

 

“But if you're so concerned, you can drop me my stuff tomorrow. At the Hyuuga residence.”

 

“WHAT?!”

 

Naruto hung up on him. He felt a bit better now, getting one in on Sasuke like that. Served him right for being such an asshole earlier.

 

“Something wrong?” Neji asked distractedly. Who was he talking to? What stuff was he referring to? Didn't he say he'd locked his keys in his apartment??

 

“Nah.”

 

Neji forced himself to abstain from questioning the blonde about it. It would only set the other boy on edge.

 

“Whatcha working on?”

 

Neji made a face. “Haiku.”

 

Naruto peered at him. “Why do it, if you don't like it?”

 

“It is sort of a side project, to expand my horizons.”

 

“Neat. How do they work?”

 

“Hmmn.” Neji gathered his thoughts for an explanation, brutally aware all the while that a curious, oblivious, and beautiful Naruto was practically perched on his shoulder. His whisker-marked cheek was inches from Neji's. “Basically you compose three lines of text, the first and third should have 5 syllables, and the middle line should have seven.”

 

“Can I see some of yours?”

 

Neji balked, but he couldn't say no to those eyes. “Ok, but I only have a few. I've been studying for a few weeks and only started trying to write them today.”

 

Naruto liked them, it seemed, and even laughed at the cousin one. “That one's about Hinata, isn't it?” he grinned.

 

Neji allowed himself a small smile. “She does have bad timing I'm afraid.”

 

“Let me try one?” Naruto asked.

 

Neji handed him a pencil and paper.

 

Naruto scrunched up his face in thought, scribbled madly, then brandished his finished work.

 

Soon to be the king

Of this shinobi village

Sasuke can bite me

 

Neji smirked. “Still calls you dead last, does he?”

 

“Yeah, but I'll prove the bastard wrong.”

 

Neji froze inside, mind in full swing… bastard… bastard… isn't that what Naruto called the person on the phone? Could it have been Sasuke? Why would he have Naruto's keys?

 

“These are kinda fun! Let's do some more!”

 

“I'll need a stiff drink I'm going to stomach that.”

 

“What do you drink?” Naruto felt his curiosity pique. His experience with alcohol was limited due to his tight budget.

 

“Saké.” Neji noted Naruto toggling between hopeful and slightly downtrodden. “Would you like some?” he ventured.

 

“Sure!”

 

---

 

About 48 Haikus, few of which had any class or followed the rules only haphazardly, Naruto listed on his side in a druken haze.

 

Neji was drunk as well, but in control of his facilities. Mostly.

 

Neji poked Naruto. “You should go to bed. I'll take you to your room.”

 

“No, I wan shtay here,” Naruto slurred, curling around the arm that was prodding him.

 

Neji felt his face heat as the blonde nuzzled his hand and blinked up at him. Neji prayed for strength as those deep blue eyes looked back at him from under lowered lids. “On the floor?”

 

“Weeell, bed'd be nishe but too high.”

 

“I'll help you.” Neji scooped Naruto up of the floor, wondering why he was burdened with pesky morals when the object of his affections was so nearly his. Naruto clung to him sleepily, inadvertently nuzzling his neck. Neji laid him on the bed, his heart pounding when Naruto didn't let go.

 

“Naruto?”

 

Naruto pulled Neji down and kissed him. It was not the most efficient of kisses, but the desire was there. Neji was torn. He desperately wanted to do with the blonde all of the things he'd written about, and more. But, if he took advantage of this right now, and Naruto was only acting this way because he was drunk… Neji choked down his impulses and pulled away from the blonde.

 

It took some doing to extract himself. He watched Naruto for several long moments, and saw that he fell asleep rather quickly.

 

Neji's body was humming with pent up energy. He decided to distract himself from the blonde, and put it to good use.

 

---

 

Hours later, putting the finishing touches on a new fanfiction, Neji saw a window pop up, partially obscuring his type editing program.

 

<Ramenluvr>: hi.

 

Neji glanced at the blonde knocked out on his bed and looked balefully at the screen.

 

<FateHASu>: Hello. Who are you?

<Ramenluvr>: you know who I am.

<FateHASu>: Do I?

<Ramenluvr>: yes.

<FateHASu>: …

<Ramenluvr>: i'm the guy you are stalking, remember?

<FateHASu>: I don't think so.

<Ramenluvr>: changed your mind, eh? good. stay away from me.

<FateHASu>: Certainly.

<Ramenluvr>: ?

<Ramenluvr>: why are you being so agreeable?

<FateHASu>: I have no problem staying away from a fake.

<Ramenluvr>: what?! what makes you think i'm a fake?

<FateHASu>: Naruto isn't at home… is he.

 

Neji refrained from taunting the impersonator. Chat logs could be copied and saved. He didn't need incriminating evidence against him.

 

<Ramenluvr>: I'll find you, you asshole.

<FateHASu>: I look forward to it.

 

Neji wondered who had access to Naruto's screen name and login.

 

---

 

*knock* *knock*

 

“Neji-sama,” a voice whispered at the door.

 

Neji awoke rather quickly. He felt a stab of annoyance towards the whisperer, as they were disrupting his precious time with Naruto. He sat up, pulling away from the grabby blonde he'd just been entangled with. Aforementioned blonde growled at the cold air now replacing Neji, and curled in on himself.

 

“This better be good,” Neji said to his door.

 

He let loose his worst look of displeasure upon the messenger. They cowered in terror. “N-Neji-sama. The l-last of the Uchiha is here to s-see you.”

 

Pale eyes flicked to a clock beside the bed: 2am. Sasuke had indeed waited till `tomorrow' but had made it as much an inconvenience as possible. Neji made himself presentable, but allowed his hair to stay free and mildly disheveled. It was sure to make Uchiha livid.

 

“Neji-sama,” a guard greeted him.

 

Neji nodded at him.

 

“He said he had things for this Naruto fellow. I took them in, but he won't leave. Says he needs to see him. And I says, `well, son, maybe you need to come back during more respectable hours,' I says.”

 

“Thank you, Shinta. I'll talk to him. You may leave your post for the time being.”

 

“Sir.” Shinta bowed and ducked away.

 

Neji pushed the intercom at the gate. “Bastard?” he said, pitching his voice like Naruto's, knowing the crackling of the intercom would take care of the rest.

 

“Naruto? What are you doing here? I thought you said Hyuuga was - ”

 

Neji invoked Byakugan to peer through the gate at his enemy.

 

Sasuke looked up and around, suspicious. He also looked worried and pissed.

 

“Neji is what?” he asked in Naruto's voice.

 

Sasuke's hand left the intercom button. He turned his back, and was doing something Neji couldn't quite make out.

 

Oh, fuck, Neji thought when he realized Sasuke was using a cell phone. Uchiha grinned maliciously. He was calling the number Naruto had called from earlier! If Naruto answered, he'd know Naruto wasn't the one at the door.

 

Neji waited. Apparently no one picked up. Uchiha's plan had failed. Thank god Naruto was a sound sleeper.

 

Sasuke mashed the button to the intercom. “I know that's you, Hyuuga.”

 

“So what, Uchiha?”

 

“Let me in!”

 

“Why?” he asked coldly.

 

Sasuke looked frustrated. “Naruto's only staying there because I have the keys to his apartment,” he shot back. “I also have his cell phone, and the clothes he was wearing. Didn't you wonder at his lack of undress, Hyuuga?”

 

Neji had wondered. A lot.

 

But he wasn't rising to the bait. “If that is the case, then I wonder how you could expect to keep him when you leave him wandering Konoha, looking for a kind face and a helping hand, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and a lot of water, insisting that he'd gone to the pool and returned home to realize he'd locked his keys in his apartment.”

 

Sasuke had nothing to say to that.

 

“Are you sure he even wants to see you?” Neji taunted. “Maybe he won't want to bother getting out of my bed to do so.”

 

Sasuke was livid. And he hadn't even had to bother to let Uchiha see him. Neji smirked. “Sweet dreams, Sasuke,” he cooed in Naruto's voice. Then disabled the speaker system.

 

Shinta had returned.

 

“Hyuuga!” Sasuke's voice could be heard faintly, as he shouted at the gate. “Hyuuga!! Touch him and I'll kill you!”

 

“Er -“ the guard said uncertainly.

 

“Don't mind him. Just wait for him to go away.”

 

“Yessir,” Shinta replied with a deep bow. “Thank you for the break, sir.”

 

“My pleasure.”

 

 

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