Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Harry Potter and the Flying Fiery Ninja Fury ❯ Hey... The Little People Are Getting Bigger... ( Chapter 2 )

Chapter Two: Hey… The Little People Are Getting Bigger…

Authoress: Hahaha… chapter two is up and running already. I type humor a lot faster than I do regular fics…

Naruto: Duh. What did you think would happen?

Authoress: Meh. Sorry for the OOCness here. I'm pushing OOC to the limit man!! WOOT! Warning for more crazy naked Malfoy, Naruto's bad language, and just plain mind-melting dribble.

Naruto: The authoress, again, does not own anything here. Harry Potter and Naruto belong to J.K. Rowling-sama and Masashi Kishimoto-sama, respectively.

Authoress: ON WITH THE FIC!!

**************************************************************** ***********************************************

When we last left the four imbeciles, they were surrounded by darkness. Well, the darkness that surrounded the four young magicians continued to drag on as they fell (no surprise there…), Harry now squealing and screaming like a little girl, Ron clutching his ears in attempts to make the noise stop, Hermione swimming fish-like through the air for her book, and Draco clutching his privies to make the "uncomfortable flopping" stop.

Harry: ::Voice VERY high pitched:: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Ron: Bloody hell Harry, STOP! ::Rubbing temples with his palms::

Harry: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Hermione: HARRY! ::Finally reaches book and pulls it to her chest, stroking the leather binding like it were her child or something:: Good book friend, you'll be safe now.

Draco and Ron: ……… ::Shudder::

Harry: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-

Draco: WHHHEEEEE!!!! THIS IS ACUTALLY VERY FUN!!!! ::Flailing arms around now, letting it allllllllll hang lose::

Harry: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::Takes a deep breath:: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Hermione: HARRY POTTER! ::Tears a strip off of her robes and "swims" over towards him, cramming the potion covered cloth into his mouth::

Harry: ::Muffled:: aaaaahhhhhh!

Ron: STOP IT DAMMIT! ::Hits Harry over the head with the back of his fist, causing the other teen to flip through the air forward and stop his girly screaming fit long enough to notice the ground that is rapidly approaching them::

Harry: Hey… The little people are getting bigger…

Ron: O_O WHAT!?

Hermione: Oh no! We're going to crash!

Draco: FFFFFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLL THHHHHHEEEEEEEEE BRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::Arms and legs spread out, facing the earth like he were diving into a pool::

Ron: Damn… This is gonna hurt…

Meanwhile, on terra firma…

Blondie: HA! I WIN! TAKE THAT ASSHOLE, PRICK, NOT SO GREAT ANYMORE UCHIHA BOY!!!! ::Hands on hips, very smug look on face::

Asshole: ::Not paying attention any more, glancing up at the sky:: O___O ORO!? ::Scampers away from the shadows on the ground, hides in the forest::

Pink Blob: ::Glancing at the sky and the dark figures above them as well:: Nani!? ::Follows Asshole, clings to his arm::

Silver-haired Hentai: o.o *HENTAI NIGERU!!!!!!! ::Dashes next to the two teens, hiding under the small book, the words "Come Come Paradise" now clearly noticeable on the small cover::

Blondie: HEY! WHERE THE HELL ARE YA GOING! ::Looks up to see what the three other members of his cell have seen, blue eyes going wide at the sight of four people, three males (one of which he was CERTAIN was a male) and a female, falling through the air directly above him:: SHIT!

Four people: WAHHHH!! ::Land right on top of Blondie, smashing the poor youth into the earth in a mass pile of limbs, robes and a stray book, which was still being held tightly in the girl's arms::

Blondie: Shit! SHIT SHIT SHIT! Who's naked ASS is in my face!? ::Twitches at the very uncomfortable closeness between him and the ass, Blondie digging his fingers into the dirt path in an attempt at trying to dig his way away from the pile:: NASTY NASTY NASTY!!

Draco: Heh heh heh, that tickles. ::Giggling like a school girl, lying on his back with Harry sprawled horizontally over his stomach and Ron twisted around his legs. Hermione, on the other hand, had landed on top of Harry's back, sitting upright with a smug look of superiority on her face.::

Ron: Ugh… PLEASE let me be touching something NOT attached to Malfoy… ::Struggles to untangle himself from the knot that they have tangled themselves into, worming his way around Malfoy's legs and crawling on all fours a safe distance away from the group::

Blondie: GET OFF!!! ::Shoves the remaining three off, causing them to fall into a separate pile a few feet away from him:: NASTY! I HAD THAT FUCKIN' BASTARD'S NAKED ASS IN MY FACE!! IT'S NAKED! AND AN ASS! ALL AT ONCE!!!!!!!! ::Hyperventilating almost::

Asshole: No shit Naruto, what ELSE would it be. ::Has now come out from the forest, brushing off the twigs and leaves sticking to his pants while prying the silver-haired pervert from his ass:: Get OFF Kakashi-sensei! ::Turns to his arm where the Pink Blob has placed herself, reaching for his crowbar and getting to work on her grip:: Off! OFF I SAY!!

Kakashi: Fine! ::Pouts, releases Asshole's ass and goes over to Blondie, grabbing him defensively:: Are you alright!? Did you get hurt!? Do you need anything to make it better!? ^. ( His other eye IS covered, you remember…) ::Grope, grope, molest, touch::

Blondie: I'm fine! Stop touching me! ::Squirms away and heads over to the wizard (and witch) pile, glancing down at the three:: Who the hell are you guys!? Do you know who you just landed on!?

Draco: Uh… no??

Blondie: ::Again, puts one hand on his hip, the other pointing at the three in his classic look:: I'm the great Ninja Uzumaki Naruto, and you're gonna PAY for landing on me! ::Swells up chest::

Hermione: That's fine and all, but where are we? ::Stands up, dusts off her robes and steps across Harry's legs to stand in front of Naruto::

Naruto: ::Crest fallen because his threat didn't even faze them:: Uh, Konoha village. Duh.

Ron: ::Stands up as well, moves next to him:: Konowhat village?

Asshole: Konoha village. ::Crosses arms and stares nonchalantly at the wizards::

Ron: Wha?

Asshole: -_-;; Leaf Village…

Ron, Hermione, Harry, and Draco: ?_? ……?

Asshole: … The damned village BEHIND YOU! ::Points at the gates of Konoha village in aggravation, the words "Welcome to Leaf Town, Y'all" scrawled in green crayon over the gates, a majority of the letters either backwards or upside-down::

Harry: Never heard of it… ::Light bulb over head, eyes wide:: Hey, where's the fox!?!?

Naruto: Huh? Me? ::Points to chest with thumb::

Harry: FOX! ::Flings at, stroking Naruto's hair:: Lookie Hermione, it's the fox! We found it!

Naruto: ::Flames in eyes:: "It?" IT!? WHO'RE YOU CALLIN' IT, DUMBASS!! ::Shoves Harry off, glares menacingly at him::

Asshole: Who are you people? What do you want here? ::Convulses:: You're Itachi in disguise, aren't you? Huh?! Huh!!??? YOUR SILENCE IS PROOF!!! ::Keeps twitching, tries to lunge but it caught by Kakashi.::

Ron: Uh… I have no idea who "Itchy" is…

Asshole: YARGH! KAKASHI-SENSEI LET ME GO! IT'S ITAAAACCCCCHHHHHIIIII!! ::Frothing now, one eye twitching rapidly and the other wide with a deer-caught-in-the-headlights look::

Kakashi: ::Holding him upside down around his waist, a smile (or so we think it's a smile…) on his face as he shakes his head:: No no no, bad Sasuke, you can't kill the idiots.

Ron: o.o? Uh… Right… ::Looks away from Kakashi and Sasuke, very disturbed by the whole scenario::

Naruto: Well, who are ya!? ::Puffs up chest once more::

Ron: I'm Ron Weasly.

Draco: Draco Malfoy, son of Lucius Malfoy, a pu-

Harry: ::Interrupts Malfoy's statement (thank GOD):: HARRY POTTER! PRESENT! ::Raises hand and giggles like a school girl, still sitting on the ground where Naruto threw him::

Hermione: I am Hermione Granger. Pleased to meet you. ::Extends hand to Naruto::

Naruto: … Riiight… ::Ignores it, turns to Draco:: So, YOU'RE the one that shoved their nasty naked ASS in my FACE, huh!? ::Holds up fist menacingly::

Draco: Oopsie… I did? ::Innocent look::

Naruto: YEAH, YA DID! ::Flings at Draco, growling and snapping at him like the fox he really is::

Pink Blob: ::Notices the others for the first time, since she had been preoccupied with Sasuke:: AH! He's naked!! ::Shields eyes::

Hermione: Yes, we've been through this once already. He is quite naked. ::turns to Pink Blob:: And you are?

Pink Blob: Haruno Sakura. ::Extends hand to Hermione, Naruto is seen flying through the background in a whirlwind of dirt and dust, tufts of blonde hair flying at random::

Hermione: Pleased to meet you. ::Takes her hand and shakes it, Sasuke is seen kicking and screaming in Kakashi's arms, the jounin reaching for a small bottle in his pocket::

Kakashi: Sasuke-kun, did you forget to take your pills today? ::Holding bottle before the boy's upside-down face::

Sasuke: O_O AH! WHO TOLD YOU!?

Kakashi: Tsk, tsk, tsk… ::Tries to force one down his throat::

Sasuke: AAAAHHHH! RAPE!! RAAAAAAAPPPPPEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! ::Kicking and screaming::

Harry: ::Running around on all fours, chanting "Fox! Fox! Fox!" over and over again.::

Draco: ::Still getting his ass kicked::

Naruto: ::Still kicking his naked ass::

Sakura: ::Talking in a high-pitched, giddy voice with Hermione about other odd girl things::

Hermione: ::Doing the same::

Sasuke: AAAHHHH!!!

Kakashi: Now now, hold still Sasuke-kun.

Harry: ::Still running::

Draco: ::STILL getting his ass kicked::

Naruto ::STILL opening a can of whoop ass on Draco::

Sakura: ::STILL talking::

Hermione: ::STILL doing the same::

Sasuke: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Kakashi: Hehehehehehehehehe…

Ron: ::Twitch twitch:: EVERYONE SHUT THE HELL UP!!

Everyone else: ::Stops where they were at:: ?_? What?

Ron: ::Panting:: Thank GOD. That was getting really bloody annoying, did you know that!?

Everyone else: … … --_--

Ron: …? ::Thinking to self:: Oh shit… what did I do now!?

Everyone else: YYYYYYYYAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! ::Fling at Ron, led by Naruto and followed by Sasuke, soon the whole group a giant ball of smoke and dirt on the ground, hair, clothing and fur (WTF!?) flying::

The fight continues for some time, when all of a sudden…

A WIG flies out of the tussle!

Everyone: ::Intake of breath:: GASP!!

**************************************************************** ***********************************************

Authoress: WOOT! A second chapter of sucky madness!! What do you want, I had too much free time and sugar to pass this up. A wig? Who's wig is it?? Am I going to start this questioning thing again??? What are all of these question marks for????

Sasuke: Ugh… I hate you. I hate you I hate you I hate you. ::Continues saying it over and over again::

Authoress: Look, if you hate me so much then I won't give you Naruto for letting me destroy your character like we promised.

Sasuke: ::Shuts up::

Authoress: Good boy.

Chibi Naruto: ::Fox ears and tail, cute little paws:: Wead and Weview!! Pwease? ::Blink blink::

Sasuke: He means read and review…

Chibi Naruto: That's wot I said! Wead and Weview!