Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Hot Sand ❯ Healing our Wounds ( Chapter 20 )

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Hot Sand

by Lemon Drops/thatreevesgirl (they're both me)

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Authors Note: I would definitely like to share some BEAUTIFULfanart which I received from one of my favorite artists. Mako-chan (I love you, mako-chan!!!!) made it as a fanart for Hot Sand (she is soooooo wonderful and such a great person). The picture is so smexy I want to cry, please check it out at http://kemonomichi.livejournal.com/17030.html#cutid1 (yes, just copy and paste the link you lazy bastards)

 

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Chapter 20: Healing our Wounds

 

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People cannot control time. It is a constant which forces us forward, to go beyond the places we have been into things yet unexplored…our moments to come. It is saddening to think of the losses we have acquired, and even more disheartening to know they could have once been ours. This leaves us with regret, a pained memory of things done or gone wrong which we might never make amends for. We carry the scars of time with us for the entirety of our lives, and the only thing we can truly do is to not repeat the same mistakes twice, in the hope we will grow beyond our indiscretions.

 

Sasuke was inflicted by these marks of his past. They were the horrors of a man who had made many mistakes in his lifetime, but there was one which rose above them all. By definition it was the choice which changed his existence forever, the life altering moment when he turned Naruto away. Fighting back tears, which seemed to plague the young ninja so often these days, Sasuke glanced around the dimly lit room until he found familiarity in the man slumped at his bedside.

 

Kakashi?

 

The older jonin stirred, glancing up at Sasuke with a worried eye which spoke of a hundred uncertainties, these doubts also danced in the nearly hidden inflections of his voice, “You're awake.”

 

It was simple, straightforward, and spoke nothing of the things Kakashi truly wanted to say, but it was also easy. The words which he still concealed were more difficult, nearly impossible for Kakashi to express.

 

“How's Naruto?” the scratchy, pained voice of Sasuke inquired.

 

Of course Sasuke would ask about Naruto, Kakashi should have known he would. “Naruto is still with us, Lee and Neji came by a little bit ago to inform me of that.”

 

“Good.” The relief in Sasuke's tone said more than his succinct response. Even with Kakashi sitting beside him, and though Naruto had shown time and time again he wished to only be with Gaara, Sasuke was still stuck in the past, reliving a memory which refused to die.

 

“You were stupid, incredibly dumb. Leaving your post, forgetting your duty, putting the Hokage in danger…nearly dying…” The last words choked Kakashi, the thought of Sasuke dying was a dire one indeed. “I'm glad you didn't die.”

 

The gentle chuckle let loose by the injured ninja caught Kakashi off guard, “I'm glad I didn't die too.”

 

“Sometimes I wonder about that. You seem to put yourself into more troublesome situations than even Shikamaru could count.”

 

Kakashi was right, Sasuke did have a penchant for being a nuisance, always embracing dangerous dilemmas with the hope he would somehow benefit from the situation. Sasuke repeated this mistake numerous times, and it was things like that which made a man foolish. He was smart, a proclaimed genius, but at the same time Sasuke was nothing but an idiot when it came to matters of the heart. His heart led him to vengeance, to unrequited love, to imprudent and reckless relationships with those around him…one of those people was watching him carefully with a lone, vexing eye.

 

“Why do you care, Kakashi?”

 

“Because I should.” That answer might have been enough if Sasuke had any clue about Kakashi's true feelings. The copy-nin only pushed those away who endangered the walls which he had erected around his heart, and so Sasuke was shoved as far away as possible. Sasuke couldn't have known that, but Kakashi stupidly assumed he did.

 

“You don't have to care, I'm all right. I'll be fine.”

 

Sasuke tensed, his nerves leaping to attention as a strong hand ghosted along his arm, stopping at his shoulder to give it a reassuring squeeze. It didn't end there, instead Kakashi's fingers wandered further up as they traced Sasuke's collarbone and then his jaw, stopping only when his hand could rest upon the Uchiha's cheek. Sasuke fought the temptation to nuzzle in response to the gentle ministrations…how utterly indignant such a thing would be, especially with Kakashi. Maybe with Naruto, but not with the man who had seemingly thrown his world into chaos (though chaos and Sasuke did seem to go hand in hand, nearly as well as Kakashi and he did). No…there was no way Sasuke would allow it.

 

“Please stop.”

 

Kakashi pulled away, fighting the urge to show how much Sasuke's reaction affected and hurt him. “I just wanted you to know something.”

 

“And what's that?” It was a forced disinterest, one which Sasuke skillfully presented. Years of being seemingly unaffected by anything and hiding even the most miniscule of emotions (save anger, loathing, and general indifference) gave Kakashi the sense that Sasuke didn't care about what he was saying, but he would express what was in his heart anyway.

 

“I wanted you to know that you're important to me, that's why I care. You've always been someone who I needed…I just need you a bit more now.”

 

Sasuke was going to ask Kakashi to leave, but the words needed to do so got stuck in his throat. There would always be Naruto, but at what point had Kakashi weaseled his way into Sasuke's heart as well? Maybe it was because Kakashi was still willing, where Naruto was nothing more than a piece of the Uchiha's past. At the very least, Kakashi was allowed to stay, to be at Sasuke's side until the confused ninja figured out what to do with the situation.

 

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Sakura checked Naruto's vitals for the hundredth time that hour. She could do little else, so the kunoichi busied herself with the task of knowing exactly how Naruto was. There was no explanation why Naruto wasn't dead. For all intents and purposes he should have been. It was difficult to remember how strong a person he truly was, especially when at the moment Naruto looked helpless as he was hooked up to wires and seals and a hundred other things which only served to make him look small and weak.

 

“When will he wake up?” Gaara asked, the anger he had shown in the chasm gone and forgotten hours ago.

 

“I don't know…I don't even know if he will wake up,” Sakura admitted. The med-nin didn't wish to give false hope, because there was still a good chance Naruto wouldn't make it (though something told her that he would).

 

Gaara bent over and brushed Naruto's cheek with his fingers, and even leaned in to kiss the Hokage. It was rare for the former Kazekage to show affection in front of anyone, but it was just Sakura, someone who Naruto, and now Gaara, trusted immensely. When did this familiarity begin, when did Gaara start to feel like family just like Naruto?

 

There was a time when Sakura honestly wondered if there wasn't more between herself and her former teammate, but in the end they received something better than a failed relationship…they were family. Sakura had taken Naruto and accepted him as the brother she never had, and Naruto cherished his friendship with Sakura and adopted her, Sasuke, Kakashi, and even Iruka as his true family. She couldn't lose her family, Sakura refused to let him die.

 

Sakura walked behind the distraught Suna man, never before attempting anything of this sort, but it seemed right at the moment. Leaning forward she hugged Gaara and whispered, “I will do everything in my power to make sure he lives.”

 

The arms which were wrapped around Gaara felt safe…comforting. With everything which had happened, he hadn't truly let himself feel the grief or the worry. Gaara allowed himself anger and pain, but not the sorrow of nearly losing the one you loved. Gaara didn't hug back, but allowed himself to be held and reassured by Sakura.

 

In faintest of murmurs, the redheaded man expressed his biggest fear, “I don't know what I'll do if he dies. He can't…”

 

Sakura surprisingly knew exactly how to respond to the broken man, “Just remember that when he wakes up. Remember how much you love him.”

 

Gaara swore he would commit that to memory, because he didn't want to be jealous or hateful if Naruto awoke. He wanted the happiness he had with Naruto back. More than anything Gaara wanted a chance to build a family with the man who taught him how to love. The roads which lead to the best things in life are never easy; they are rocky and difficult to travel, because it is by these paths which we learn the most. Gaara knew this. A life plagued by obstacles had shown him how much you can grow by rising above your problems. He loved Naruto, and that was enough if it was all that could be.

 

“I know he loves you,” Sakura reminded the man she comforted. “He loves you more than he has ever loved anyone.”

 

“It's true…” a muffled whisper replied. The words sounded groggy and nearly inaudible, but they were spoken by the Hokage himself.

 

The scurry to Naruto's side between Sakura and Gaara was clumsy, with Sakura nearly taking out one of the hospital's monitors in the process. More happy tears were shed by the kunoichi now than any of the hundreds of times she cried in her youth.

 

“You idiot!” she yelled halfheartedly. “You scared me to death! You have got to be the stupidest man I have ever known!”

 

Naruto was too exhausted to respond with his normal quips, so he resigned himself to giving her a half smirk in defiance of the verbal thrashing he was receiving. Gaara, who was on the opposite side of Naruto's hospital bed, didn't say anything, but gripped Naruto's hand in his.

 

“Gaara…” Naruto whispered, the name of the redhead seemed to heal more than all the seals and medicine combined and Naruto weakly grinned at his fiancé.

 

“Quiet,” Gaara hushed Naruto, “You need rest.”

 

“I need…to say I love you,” Naruto told Gaara with a devious smirk.

 

Gaara rolled his eyes, and then smiled, “I know, I love you too.”

 

Sakura stepped back and watched as the two men healed whatever had been broken the night before. Her relieved grin showing just how much she was glad Gaara found the ability to forgive.

 

“Hi babe, I see your patient is doing better,” Kankuro said as he slinked up behind her. The puppet-nin had been waiting and watching from the hallway, knowing that there was little he could do other than give Sakura the space to work. She was brilliant, and on the few occasions Kankuro had tried to be in the room to help, he only seemed to be in the way (or he would somehow piss Gaara off). In light of that, Kankuro decided the best place for him was somewhere near, but not directly present.

 

“I'm so tired, and relieved…and…he's alive,” Sakura whimpered, letting the sobs get caught in her throat. Kankuro gripped her fiercely, wishing he could take away every ounce of worry she had.

 

“No more crying,” Naruto quietly ordered, “I'll be fine.”

 

“Yeah, because you're too stubborn to die, you big oaf,” Sakura joked back, trying to quell the tears, but failed miserably since they were a mixture of relief, happiness, and the reaction to her experiences of the previous night.

 

“Get some sleep, that's an order Haruno,” Naruto told her with another slight smirk.

 

Sakura didn't want to leave, but Naruto was right, she needed the rest or she would be useless to everyone. “Okay, I'll find another med-nin to keep an eye on you, but I won't be far. Just ask for me if you need something.”

 

“I will…and thanks.” Naruto knew it was Sakura's skills as a doctor which had brought him back from the brink of death. There was no one else in all of the ninja nations which could have done so, this he was certain of. He was not only grateful to her, but Gaara too. Naruto had a sneaking suspicion that Gaara had a great deal to do with his return to the land of the living, and as he allowed sleep to recapture him, Naruto smiled at the thought of the man who he loved more than any other.

 

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“Would you hold still? This is difficult enough, without you sitting there squirming like a three year old.”

 

Sasuke didn't appreciate Sakura badgering him with a terrible bedside manner (which she seemed to reserve only for him). “I'm fine, go away.”

 

“No, you need to allow me to heal you, or I'll get Kakashi to hold your stupid ass down while I finish what I've started.”

 

Sasuke groaned, the last thing he wanted was Kakashi to spend another minute in his room. It was hard enough to get the copy-nin to leave and go get some rest elsewhere. The previous night Kakashi had slept in a chair at Sasuke's bedside, and that unnerved the Uchiha.

 

“How's Naruto?”

 

Every time Sakura checked in on Sasuke, he asked about the Hokage. She knew it was more than worry. There had been a time when Naruto obviously followed Sasuke to the ends of the Earth, so why did the bastard finally choose to be concerned about the teammate he once ostracized?

 

“Good, he's making a lot of progress. I see him being able to be moved back to Konoha in about a week. Some of the Rock dignitaries have been quite helpful, giving us everything we need to provide Naruto with the best care possible.”

 

“That's good, I'm glad to hear that,” Sasuke responded, trying to hide his elation.

 

Sakura knew better, there was something up with her old teammate, she wasn't sure exactly what, but it seemed to encompass everything he did lately. “Sasuke, what's going on?”

 

Sometimes there is no use hiding things from those you care about, because eventually they'll find out anyway. Sasuke finally allowed himself to admit the truth to a friend, and Sakura listened as he told her the entirey of what had happened over the past week. It wasn't easy, and in the end Sasuke felt more broken than he ever had before, mostly because the situation was hopeless.

 

“What about Kakashi?” Sakura asked, putting words to the question which had been hidden in the back of Sasuke's mind.

 

What about Kakashi? This was something which Sasuke didn't really want to think about. He wasn't in love with Kakashi like he was with Naruto, but there was that inkling, a small part of Sasuke which told him it was a possibility. If Sasuke allowed himself to try, the seeds for a romantic relationship were there, he was sure of it. All the feeling needed was a chance to grow.

 

“Kakashi's worried, I can see it. Kakashi never let's you know what he's feeling, so maybe you should talk to him.”

 

“What about Naruto?” Sasuke asked, still stuck on the faint glimmer of hope he'd received when trapped in the ravine with his first love.

 

Sakura shook her head, it was difficult to say, but Sasuke needed to hear it, “Naruto loves Gaara. Let him love Gaara. Please Sasuke, you have to move beyond him.”

 

“I don't know if I can.”

 

Sakura understood this, because there had once been a young man whom she loved more than anything, but in the end she gave him up to be saved by another. Naruto had saved Sasuke, and then Gaara.

 

“Things happen for a reason, Sasuke, I believe that he was only a small portion of the greater things to come. Let yourself and Naruto be happy, remember the love you had and cherish it always, but don't let it hold you back. And don't worry too much if it takes time and a lot of effort. I'll be there for you, and I'll help you.”

 

“Thanks Sakura,” Sasuke whispered, once again letting himself forget the mask which he wore around the rest of the world. It seemed to shatter whenever he was around Naruto or Sakura…even Kakashi. “Do me a favor.”

 

“Sure, what do you need, Sasuke?”

 

“Tell Kakashi that I'll try, but not right away. I need some time…”

 

Sakura nodded. As harsh as time could be, it was also something which could heal giant expanses of pain, and she trusted that eventually Sasuke would realize what a good thing being with Kakashi was. She finished healing her friend and leaned in to give him a kiss under those long dark bangs. Kakashi had once loved Iruka more than life itself, but now Sasuke and Kakashi had an opportunity to heal each other…to forget the pain of their pasts. Sakura wished vehemently for their happiness, for they were both deserving of love.

 

“I know what you're giving up, so I'm sure he'll understand,” Sakura told her friend as she moved to leave the room, and added a quiet whisper, “I wish for nothing but your happiness, Sasuke.”

 

 

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END OF CHAPTER

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End of Chapter A/N's: I am so glad finals are over. Icky, icky, icky!!! Not only did I have to deal with that, but this chapter was like pulling freakin' teeth…so hard to write!!! OMG, I'm glad I'm done with it. One more chapter and then an epilogue. I can't believe this story is coming to a close…it's sooooo sad. Oh well, there will be a sequel and mini-arcs

 

Fellow writers, I have started a fanfiction author community with challenges, tips, and such. Please go check it out. http://community.livejournal.com/fanfic_firstaid/