Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Life Sucks ❯ Chapter 1

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own what doesn't belong to me…So I don't own Naruto

WARNING: This story contains some violence, swearing, and maybe Lemons in the far, far future.

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Naruto was sure that somewhere out in the farthest reaches of the universe, some deity or higher power was laughing their asses off at his misfortune.

He felt utterly humiliated while walking down the main street of Konoha because of the older blonde male attached to his arm.

The upside to his embarrassment though, was the unflattering looks of utter shock on the faces of the villagers. It almost made him feel okay about his situation…almost.

Then there was also the fact that Duck-ass-for-hair was acting like a bloody guard dog and was snarling in his evil Uchiha way at anyone that came within five feet of him. Of course he went back to his obsessive staring once he was done giving the evil eye to whomever was unfortunate enough to stray to close to him.

It was too bad the boy couldn't get the leech of a father off his now numb arm. It would be amusing to see the two men going at each other like rabid animals.

Naruto chuckled at the mental image of Sasuke lunging at Minato while frothing at the mouth and Minato launching himself at the other with a primal growl. His amusing thought process was abruptly cut off when he felt hands tightening around his arm. He glanced questionably at the older man beside him, fleetingly eyeing the hands around his persons with a bit of irritation.

He swore that if that attitude continued, he would personally do... something... to the older man. The blonde wasn't quite sure on what it was yet but it would be traumatizing... and painful.

Minato smiled at him warmly and caressed his whiskered cheek. With a scowl, Naruto jerked away from the man and quickly decked him in the stomach, watching with malicious amusement as he kneeled over gasping. That wasn't quite what he was thinking, but it would do for now.

He ignored the wounded look on the ex-Hokage's face and sauntered off in dark satisfaction. Who the hell did he think he was, touching him like that? The nerve!

Naruto's glower swiftly turned into a smile as he relished the shouts of outrage from the villagers nearby. After all, who would attack him while the emotionally impaired Uchiha was snapping at anyone near him?

He would deal with this, he decided, paying no heed to the older blonde that hastily caught up with him and the Uchiha.

He survived this far while the world tried to push him down. There was no way the two following him could make his life worse…right?

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Elsewhere in some hidden location, a lone figure was crouched in front of an Alter.

"Soon my Naruto-Kun." The worshipful voice crooned. The figure picked up the picture of the blonde that had been placed on the Alter. The person giggled, tracing the face in the photo.

The lights from the candles nearby flickered ominously in the small room.

"Soon…"

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"So you're telling me that Hokage-sama is letting a traitor and a questionably sane ex-Hokage live with Naruto?" Came a dangerous whisper, the brown haired man who spoke growled, clutching the edge of the table in front of him tightly.

The silver haired Jounin across from him rubbed the back of his head nervously, watching the other apprehensively.

"Kakashi?"

"Yes Iruka?" The masked Ninja replied cautiously, eyeing the Chuunin as if he were a dangerous creature ready to maul the next thing that moved. The scarred brown haired man breathed out slowly then picked up his forgotten dango and viciously took a bite out of it.

Kakashi winced at the display of anger and couldn't help but vaguely wonder if he should have told his boyfriend the news at his home instead of a restaurant.

The Chuunin put the dango down on the plate then abruptly stood, his face set with grim determination.

"We're going to visit Naruto," Iruka smiled, eyes glinting dangerously," after all, it's been awhile right?"

"We?" Kakashi questioned, not liking where this was heading.

"Yes!" Iruka snapped, turning on his heels, quickly leaving the eating establishment. Kakashi soon followed his lover with a sigh, rolling his eye at Iruka who was questioning the judgment of the Hokage under his breath. He should have just let the man find out on his own.

Kakashi pulled out his Icha Icha Paradise and shrugged. What was done was done.

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"Alright, so I'll be back in about an hour," Naruto said, shifting through his Gama-Chan, " I trust you won't destroy my home?"

He stopped what he was doing and stared at the two men sitting on his old lumpy couch. His eyebrows furrowed in thought, he really should buy a new one… Naruto shook his head quickly then glared at the fucktards in front of him.

"I only need to buy a few groceries so don't ruin my damn apartment, got it?"

Minato nodded enthusiastically while Sasuke continued his….staring. Seriously, it was really starting to creep him out.

Naruto eyed them suspiciously, huffed, grabbed Gama-Chan, and walked out the door. He would castrate the two if anything was so much as scratched.

Yep, he thought to himself, if anything were to happen, they would rue the day they were born.

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Naruto soon found himself in the market place and briefly pondered about what he needed to buy. He knew that he needed to buy more then usual due to his unwanted guests.

He scowled at the thought of having to spend extra money, especially on two speech impaired dimwits.

The Kyuubi holder went about buying the usual things ones home needed- bread, milk, eggs, and of course, Ramen.

Naruto then started walking home, carrying his grocery bags. He smiled in bliss at the thought of eating those yummy noodles that were nestled in the bags he was holding. Oh how he loved Ramen. His beautiful and perfect Ramen. It was food of the gods dammit! He didn't care if anyone said otherwise!

The blonde swiftly snapped himself out of his daze when he realized that a lot of people were running away from the direction he was heading. He felt a sinking sensation in his stomach.

He bit his bottom lip and silently prayed it was nothing horrible.

Naruto quickened his pace dodging random citizens then finally turned at a corner that would bring his home into view.

He froze and felt the bags he was holding slip to the ground.

His entire apartment building was on fire.

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Ha! I did it! It took me long enough though...

I wonder how long it will take for the next one?

Please Read and Review!