Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Naruto & the Idiot Brigade ❯ A Day of Laughs and Mischeif... ( Chapter 11 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Tsunade pulled her hair in frustration. She was a complete mess. Her breath smelled like a dead rat, a wrinkle had just formed on her head, her hair was gorilla like and she just looked really REALLY ugly... Jiraiya and Orochimaru took a step back away from the principal slut in caution.

"ARRRGH!!!!" Tsunade kicked the chair and looked for something else to beat the shit out of. She slowly turned to Orochimaru. Orochimaru, being the coward he is hid behind the lamp in her office. Tsunade turned to Jiraiya and growled.

"uh..." Jiraiya muttered, frozen with fear. "Protect me lord!" He whispered. "Bless our father, who art in heaven, hollowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven-"

"SHUT UP!" Tsunade lunged at Jiraiya.

"Tsunade!" Jiraiya tried to push her off. "Tsunade! Your... your breath! It... Your breath! It stinks!"

"..." Tsunade paused.

"uh-oh..." Orochimaru ran for cover. "It's coming!!! Move Jiraiya! MOVE!" Orochimaru signaled for Jiraiya to run.

"grrrrahhhhhhhh!!!" Tsunade let out a big, big, huge, gigantic, smelly, awful, stinky... fart. Bet you didn't see that coming, did ya?

"AHHHHHH!!!" Jiraiya had tears in his eyes. "The smell is so awful!" He chocked down on some water.

"I had a spicy breakfast..." Tsunade shrugged. "So what? It's not like you never farted before-"

"oh, I farted all right, but your fart was a million times stinkier than mines!" Jiraiya coughed.

"Farting is natural, Jiraiya..." Tsunade tried to resist the urge of strangling Jiraiya to his death.

"But your fart was so-mmfph!" Jiraiya was cut off by Orochimaru's hand.

"Shut up, you idiot!" Orochimaru whispered in Jiraiya's ear. "Do you have some sort of death wish?"

Jiraiya shook his head slowly, as a reply. "Then I suggest you'd better shut your mouth!" Orochimaru freed Jiraiya from his grasp.

Jiraiya opened his mouth. "Tsunade-"

"AGHHHH!!!" Tsunade gave Jiraiya a bloody beating.

"Tsunade!" Orochimaru tried to get her of Jiraiya. "C-calm down!"

"NO!" Tsunade flung Orochimaru at the wall. Jiraiya sneaked away while she threw poor Oro at the wall.

"JIRAIYA!" Tsunade's eyes followed him where ever he went. "Please!" Jiraiya fell to his knees and begged. "Don't kill me!"

"I'm not going to kill you Jiraiya!" Tsunade finally cracked. "MUAHAHAHAHA!"

"I think you forgot to take our medication this morning, Tsunade!" Jiraiya said nervously. Tsunade gave him the worst beating known to man kind.

"Idiot..." Orochimaru muttered.

Why was Tsunade so ticked? Well it was because she had a spicy breakfast and she wasn't able to fart...

Naruto ran around the classroom pretending to be an airplane. "Flying in an airplane lookin' out the window, up so very hiiiiiiiigh!" Naruto sang cheerfully.

"Stop it Naruto!" Sakura smacked him. "You'll get us in trouble!"

"Just leave him, Sakura!" Sasuke muttered. "He's an idiot!"

"Yeah!" Roxn joined in on the conversation. "He can't seem to stop talking!"

"Did you know..." Naruto started to talk. "Did you know, that when you talk, you burn more calories?"

"..." Everyone and I mean EVERYONE gave Naruto an awkward glance.

"What fiction are you reading?" Kakashi cocked a brow.

"non-FICTION!" Naruto replied casually.

"What's it called then?" Kakashi asked.

"Cinderella."

"That's not Non fiction!" Roxn exclaimed.

"Yes it is!" Naruto protested.

"It isn't real, Naruto!" Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Then how come I saw her at disney land when I went there for summer vacation?" Naruto snorted. "She looked pretty real to me!"

"Idiot!" Everyone laughed.

"Naruto can excel in one thing!" Kakashi proclaimed, but everyone laughed louder.

"I'm serious!"

"..." Everyone fell silent. An anonymous student whispered to his friend. "That was the most funniest thing i've heard!"

"Stop laughing!" Kakashi frowned. "This idiot!" Kakashi pointed at Naruto. "Can excel at something!"

"..." Everyone straigtened up.

"I just have to find out what he can excel at..." Kakashi muttered.

"Anyways, I have an important announcement!"

"This seems important!" Roxn straigtened up.

"No duh!" Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"It's M.U.Y.M.N Day!" Kakashi threw his arms in the air.

Crickets

chirp

chirp

chirp

"What the hell is that?" Naruto was the first to ask.

"M.U.Y.M.N. stands for Make. up. your. middle. name." Kakashi replied dryly. "Which makes it M.U.Y.M.N Day..."

"So all we have to do is make up our own middle name for a whole day?" Sakura asked.

"No." Kakashi replied casually. "You get to make up your own middle name and use it for a whole week."

"Then why is it called M.U.Y.M.N. DAY?" Sasuke put much effort into the last word.

"I don't know!" Kakashi shrugged. "I'm not the principal slut here! I didn't make up this stupid event! I didn't name it either!"

"I want my name to be Tony!" Naruto grinned. "It sounds cool!"

"You have to take a test in order to determine your name." Kakashi sighed.

"But it says you have to make up your name!" Sakura blinked her eyes.

"Again, I am not the principal slut in this school..." Kakashi rolled his eyes or in this case eye.

---Deidara's class---

"Okay people!" Deidara passed out the papers. "everyone has to do this test, It's manditory yeah!"

"I hate tests!" Dolly spat out. Everyone was about to write their names when a knock was heard.

"I'll get it, yeah!" Deidara walked to the door and opened it reaveling two faces.

"Deidara..." Itachi stepped into the room.

"Well, well, well!" Deidara eyed Itachi. "What do we have here?"

"Who knew you'd be teaching this class?" a smirk formed gracefully on Itachi's lips.

"Oh I knew it!" Deidara hugged him. "I knew you'd be running back into my arms! Yeah!"

"Hey, deidara!" Nami butted in. Deidara pouted. and looked at Itachi suspiciously.

"You just HAD to bring the girl with you!"

"What are you two doing here?" Sasori walked up to the three teens.

"We're here on an experiment for one week." Nami replied. "Our principal decided that we should go to this school..."

"So how's teaching so far?" Itachi pushed Deidara away from him and turned to Sasori.

"It's like living in hell here!" Sasori replied.

"We're only right here!" The students butted in listening on the conversation.

"So you two are our students?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah..." They replied. They just HAD to be in the sex ed. teacher's homeroom!

"Yeah!" Deidara punched the air with his fist.

"So what is everyone doing?" Nami peeked at Dolly's paper.

"Hey!" Dolly shooed Nami away. "No cheating!"

"I am your big sister Dolly!" Nami crossed her arms. "Do as I say!"
"You never told me to do anything!" Dolly snorted and turned to Kiba. "Kiba? Can I ask you something?"

"Spit." That was 'talk' in Kiba language.

"Are you gonna marry that dog when you grow up?" Dolly asked.

"Yeah, Are you?" Midori turned around when she heard the words 'marry' and 'dog'.

"No!" Kiba blushed furiously and backed away. "He's my dog!"

"Yeah right!" Neji rolled his eyes. "That pack rat is ALWAYS in your shirt!"

"Akamaru could be having a sexy party in your shirt for all I know!" Haku joined the conversation.

"Akamaru, is only a friend, a companion, a brother!" Kiba said with much pride. "hey! What the?" Kiba looked down when he felt something crawling down his stomach. "Hey, what are you chewing there, boy? No! That's not a toy, Akamaru, Bad dog! Bad dog! ARGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!" Kiba's eyes filled with tears and he froze.

"What the hell is his problem?" Dolly flicked Kiba on the side of his head.

"Hello people?" Deidara huffed. "You're supposed to be testing! Don't you know that this is important, yeah?"

"sorry, Deidara..." Everyone mumbled.

"Nami, Itachi! You two must sit your cute little asses down and get your test on!" Deidara pointed at the two desks in the back.

"..." They walked to the back and took their seats.

"Okay people!" Deidara clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "Test... NOW!"

"hmmm..." Neji chewed on his pencil.

Test:

Question #1: Are you gay?
Question #2: Are you Male or Female?
Question #3: If you had to drive a pen, what color would it be?
Question #4: What color is your underwear?
Question #5: Why do clouds look so fluffy?
Question #6: Cheese...

End of Test

"Kay class!" Deidara looked up. "What did ya put for question four?"

"I put black with red hearts and stars..."Haku replied.

"oh..." Deidara nodded his head. "I put none..."

"Why?" Neji cocked a brow.

"Cause..." Deidara smirked. He looked down at his penis area and without looking up, he asked Itachi the same question. "What did you get, Itachi?"

"Black..." Itachi replied.

"AHHHHH!!!" Deidara squealed. "I soo have to put this on my Itachi fan gay guy website!"

Sasori glared at Itachi with jealousy and hate. "hmpf!" Sasori turned away.

---Kakashi's class---

"Okay everyone!" Kakashi sighed. "If you want to see your results check on the school's bulletin board tomorrow..."

"I wonder what I got..." Naruto chewed on his pencil.

---tomorrow---

"Let's see what I got!" Dolly went to the bulletin board. "OH MY GOD!"

"What? What?" Neji ran to her side.

"My middle name is Cassandra!" She shrieked.

"That's a pretty stupid name!" Neji snorted.

"..." Dolly glared daggers at Neji. "Well then! See what you got!"

"It has to be as sexy as me!" Neji snorted and flipped his hair.

"WAAAAAAH!!!" Neji ran back to Dolly. "My middle name's Jim!"

"HA!" Dolly laughed in Neji's face.

"What's up?" Gaara greeted them from the other side of the hall.

"Wait up, for me Gaara!" Roxn ran to Gaara who was followed by the rest of the idiot brigade.

"Okay, bitches!" Tsunade pushed the crowd of students away from the board. "I'll read from the list.

"Neji JIM Hyuuga, Dolly CASSANDRA Li, Gaara ZAP Sabaku, Mary-roxn BETTY Cabradilla, Midori ANGELICA Saito Haku Princess Matsumoto-"

"My name's PRINCESS!?" Haku shrieked. "That's a girl's name!"

"But it matches your personality and appearance!" Midori spoke the truth.

" Ehem!" Tsunade tried to get the students attention. "Sakura ANNABELLE Haruno, Tenten Emmelina what's her last name, Sasuke BILLY Uchiha, Naruto GILLIGAN Uzumaki-"

"My name's Gilligan?!" Naruto looked up. "I don't even know how to spell Gilligan!"

"Hinata DOLORES Hyuuga, Kiba CHARLEY Inuzuka, Shino WILLIAM Aburame, Ino PEARL Yamanaka, Temari DEHLAILA Sabaku, Kankurou CLARKE Sabaku, Shikamaru DANNY Nara, Chouji PHILIP Akimichi, Nami FLORENCIA Li, and Itachi BOB Uchiha-"

"What?!" Itachi growled. "Honestly, Do I look like a 'BOB' to you?" Itachi turned to Sasuke.

"What's wrong Itachi?" Sasuke smirked. "Are you afraid to let evryone know your full name is Itachi BOB Uchiha?"

"What?!" everyone turned to Sasuke. "Sasuke, You're middle name is Bob?"

"No," Sasuke shook his head. "His name's Bob," He pointed at Itachi." My name's Billy..."

"Woah..." People whispered in each other's ear.

"You fool!" Itachi clenched his fists.

"Ewww!" Naruto shook his head. "I wouldn't want to be known as Naruto Gilligan Uzumaki!"

"As for the teachers and staff!" Tsunade got everyone's attention. "Kakashi ROGER Hatake-"

"Hahahahahahaha!!!" The students fell to the floor and rolled around laughing and laughing.

"Anko EVA Mitarashi, Asuma SMITH Sarutobi, Shizune LINDA, Gai FRED Might, Sasori DEATHER, Deidara NORMAN, Kurenai BETTY Yuuhi, Orochimaru MICHAEL, Jiraiya JEFFERSON, and last but not least me: Tsunade SUE?!" Tsunade twitched. "Do I look like a SUE to you?"

Jiraiya responded. "Well, you are the principal slut-"

"What did you say?" Tsunade gave Jiraiya a bloody beating.

"I hate my name!" Midori groaned.

"Yeah, well at least it's better then Bob!" Itachi snorted.

"But my name's Betty!" Roxn cried.

"That's still... a nice name..." Gaara nodded his head and patted her back.

"I have a freakin' ballarina's name!" Tenten punched the wall. "What kind of name is Emmelina?!"

"A girly girl's name!" Naruto exclaimed.

"Do I honestly look like a princess?" Haku turned to everyone hoping he would get a 'no' for an answer.

"Well, you are gay..." Neji proved his point.

"I'm not gay!" Haku shrieked.

"Hello?" Dolly crossed her arms. "Haku. Gay. How hard is it to understand that equation?"

"I'm not sure that is an equation, Dolly..." Neji walked towards Dolly causing her to bump into the wall. "hehe..." he snickered.

"Neji..." Dolly whispered. "Can you open your mouth?"

"um... okay..." Neji opened his mouth an felt something warm and wet on his tounge. "Bleh! Shit!" he coughed . "What the hell did you just put in my mouth?"

"It's called sweet breath!" Dolly shook the little bottle of mouthwash. "Your breath kinda stinks!"

"Does it have alcohal?" Sakura snatched the bottle from Dolly and read the ingredients.

"Sakura! I thought you knew I can't read!" Dolly gasped.

"Yup. I does have alcohal..." Sakura nodded her head and gave the bottle back to Dolly.

"ACK!" Neji chocked "I'm an alcohalic!"

"You're not an alcohalic!" Dolly rolled her eyes.

"To me, anyone who tastes one drop of alcohal is an alcohalic!" Neji snorted.

"So Neji uh... I mean Jim!" Midori coughed. "What was Sasori's middle name again?"

"I think it was Deather..." Neji replied.

"That's a funny name!" Haku giggled. "Deather..."

"Stop being a rude, stupid, jerk, Haku!" Tenten shoved him with her elbow.

"Oh, Why don't you just do me a favor and dip your head in a bowl of spaghetti!" Haku snorted.

"It's called BUNS!" Tenten turned red. "BUNS! NOT MEATBALLS! BUNS!"

"Buns? Meatballs? they're all the same!" Haku snorted even louder and turned to Midori. "I was thinking of wearing matching outfits-"

"You are totally gay." Midori rolled her eyes.

"I'm not gay!" Haku turned red.

"Oh yeah and Orochimaru dosen't look like Michael Jackson!" Sasuke said sarcastically.

"huh?" Haku cocked a brow.

"You don't know anything about sarcasm do you?" Neji sighed.

"Sar...casm? What's that?" Haku cocked his head to one side.
"Oh God!" Roxn groaned. "Why is it that everyone ALWAYS cocks their head to one side? It's just so irritating!"

"Tell me about it!" Gaara rolled his eyes.

Then Kiba appeared. "Anyways... Kiba and I are not getting married. CASE CLOSED!"

"Where are all you guys coming from?" Sasuke looked around.

"Howdy Ya'll!" Deidara and Sasori popped up out of nowhere. "My name's Norman yeah! So don't forget yeah!"

"Ehem!" Sasori coughed.
"Oh," Deidara sighed. "And his name is Deather so don't forget about him too, yeah..." He said dryly.

Deidara put his arms around Haku and Midori's shoulder. "You guys will be happy to know that I, the GREATSET teacher in the WORLD, will be teaching you the nature of sex..." Deidara grinned.

"But, you teach us the nature of sex everydaaaaaaay!" Everyone groaned and shook their heads shamefully.

"Yeah!" Naruto spoke up. "The nauseating version!"

Deidara snapped his head towards Naruto. "Whatchoo talkin 'bout Willis?" Deidara put his hands on his waist.

Sakura, Dolly, Neji, Roxn, Gaara, Midori, Haku, Tenten, and Sasuke just HAD to laugh. "Woah Deidara!" they went into hysterical laughter. "We knew you head trouble with names, but this time you're WAY off!" Gaara felt like he was being shoved into stupid land.

Deidara tapped his foot on the ground. "oh, is that how it's gonna be? IS THAT HOW IT'S GONNA BE?" He shouted for everyone to hear. "Bring it, Bitch!" he cried.

"Oh, OH!" Naruto shook his head around. "It is brung! IT IS BRUNG!"

"You and me, parking lot, after sixth period!" Deidara danced around the tables.

"I'll be there, BITCH! I'll be there!" Naruto punched the air with his fist.

"We'll see who has the sexiest body!" Deidara walked away laughing like some maniac and did his famous hair flip off.

Naruto froze.

"um... Sexiest body?" Naruto asked nervously. "I can't make it! Deidara?" he called out. "I fell sick!" he pretended to cough.
"Deidara? DEIDARA?"

"What's up with him?" Gaara asked.

"Naruto's just shy about showing his body off." Midori replied.

"I'm glad you shared with me. Please tell me more." Gaara said with sarcasm. Un fortunatly Midori never took to his sarcastic remark.

"He has this weird mark-"

"I don't need to know everything!" Gaara rolled his eyes.

"Anyways!" Haku appeared. "I was thinking of changing my name to Princess!" He exclaimed. "I feel some sort of attachment to this name!"

"So you're saying that you'e gay, right?" Neji smirked.

"Shut up JIM!" Hkau teased.

"It's my name for only one week! PRINCESS!" Neji played along.

"I just want the guys to notice me..." Haku frowned.

"GUYS?" Everyone looked at Haku.

"I didn't say guys!" Haku huffed.

"Yes you did, Haku!" Midori pointed at Haku accusingly. "I heard with my own ears!"

"I didn't say guys!" Haku was in denial. "I said: guyirls!"

"Whatever you say" Naruto coughed.

"I swear! I'm not gay!" Haku siad nervously.

"Did we say, you were gay?" Dolly grinned. "I don't think so!"

Haku looked down in shame and shook his head. Why was he ALWAYS the guy who was considered to be the gay guy man lover C student? Who knows? but for now here's a short story.


Short story: Starring my reviewers!

Title: Naps in the morning?

Yuna Ito: Hey, Hey, Hey!

jeanetta: Will you shut up? Can't you see I'm trying to sleep?

Janalyn s.: It's before noon...

Killing diva: Who the hell takes naps in the morning?

Kai_Chan: I do!

gaara252: Seriously?

Kai_Chan: Why not?

Yuna Ito: It's kinda weird...

Kai_Chan: It's my mom's fault!

xXMelissaXx: H-Hi...

Everyone: Isn't Melissa cute?

Sori-sama: gaara252 is my baby!

gaara252: That's not true!

Sori-sama: Yes it is!

jeanetta: I'll be the judge of that! *looks at gaara252* How old are you?

gaara252: Ten... (A/N: I'm just making this up so please don't be angry with me!)

jeanetta: *looks at Sori-sama* how old are you?

Sori-sama: twelve...(A/N: Again I'm jut making this up)

jeanetta: That's impossible! Boys don't develop sperm when they are two years old!

Sori-sama: I was just trying to make everyone laugh...

killing diva: Who's gay here raise your hand?

I'm Gay: *looks up* Did anyone call me?

Kai_Chan: No DUH! Of course he's gay! His name even says so!

I'm Gay: Just because my name is I'm Gay it dosen't mean I'm actually gay!

Yuna Ito: Yes it does...

gaara252: I'm gonna have to agree with him-

Yuna Ito: I'm a freakin' girl!

gaara252: oops...

xXMelissaXx: I-I suggest that... you should r-run...

gaara252: WAHHHHHHHH! *runs under table over mountains and hides in a box*

jeanetta: Did anyone see my pencil?

Everyone: no...

jeanetta: I swear! I thought I put it somewhere on my shirt!

killing diva: You used it as a hair accesory and pined it on your hair!

jeanetta: oh... *takes out pencil* Now if you excuse me, I will be going back to my daily nap

I'm Gay: And I'll be taking my weekly shower!

xXMelissaXx: Y-you take a b-bath o-once a week?

Everyone: EWWWWWWW!!! That is soooo sick!

Kai_Chan: No wonder why I smell fish!

Yuna_Ito: I think we should end this and get back to the REAL story!

Everyone: *nodds heads and falls asleep* Good night!

jeanetta: But isn't it morning?

Everyone: *snores loudly*

jeanetta: hello? HELLO?... GO TO HELL! *falls asleep*

Back to story:

Sakura, Haku, Midori, Naruto, Dolly, Neji, Tenten, and Sasuke were spying on Roxn and Gaara. They were always together. But why? They were seen eating lunch together, they were seen studying in Sasuke's house together, If they keep this up, they might be seen in the bed together!

"Dude!" Naruto whispered behind the bushes. "Gaara is such a midget and Roxn's such a... how could I put this in a none hurtful way?" Naruto thought. "Gaara is an evil midget and Roxn's a tall... person thing..."

"I know!" Roxn laughed at something Gaara said.

"Roxn is transforming Gaara into some sort of Naruto idiot!" Sasuke exclaimed. "We must get him away from her before the transformation is complete!"

"You sound stupid, Sasuke!" Midori smacked his head.

"Oh no!" Sasuke gasped. "My transformation has already begun!"

"You idiot!" Sakura just had to slap him. "You're just getting too much influence from hanging out with us!"

"You're right!" Sasuke gasped. "I must rid myself of you! ALL OF YOU!"

"No!" Midori tried to stop him. "WAIT! don't leave!"

"sorry, but there's no turning back now!" Sasuke walked away.

"Roxn and Gaara are moving!" Dolly whispered loud enough for Sasuke, Naruto, Neji, Haku, Midori, Tenten, and Sakura to hear.

"Where!" Sasuke ran back to the spot he had been earlier.

"So much for quiting!" Midori rolled her eyes.

Just then Itachi passed by. "What are you guys doing?" he questioned the kids hiding behind a bush.

"We're spying on Gaara and Roxn!" Haku whispered. "We think they are having a secret relationship behind our backs!"

"Behind our backs?" Sakura cocked a brow. "We already knew they had a relationship!"

"Okay..." Itachi nodded his head. "Nami and I would like to join in on your quest-"

"Mission!" Midori corrected.

"That too!" Itachi rolled his eyes. "But do you guys have to hide behind the school's number one peeing spot?"

"..." They were speachless. They looked at Itachi then they looked at eachother, then at the bush they were hiding behind and then back at Itachi. They froze in mid air When they took that last look at Itachi they just got the hell out of there!

"Oh God!" Dolly dusted her clothes. "Pee infestation!"

"Contamination!!!" Haku jumped around in circles like some maniac.

"I'm melting! I'M MELTING!!!" Neji pretended to melt.

"That's just going too far..." Nami and Itachi sweatdropped.

"So what's the dish?" Nami turned to the Idiot Brigade.

Naruto spoke up. "Well FLORENCIA-"

"Ehem!" Nami glared at Naruto.
"What?" Naruto tried to look innocent.

"EHEM!" Nami coughed again.

"Do you need a cough drop?" Haku offered Nami a cough drop.

"no." Nami shook her head still glaring at Naruto.

"Fine!" Naruto gave in. " Naruto reports says: Roxn and Gaara FOREVER!"

"WAHHHHH!" Nami squealed. "That is so cute!"
"I know!" Neji jumped.

"Operation One: Get Gaara and Roxn together-"

"Woah, woah woah!" Midori cut Nami off. "Roxn is like one foot taller than Gaara! And Gaara's like an evil midget! When you put them next to eachother it would be like... like Dr. Evil and Mini me!"

"UGH!" Sasuke shuddered. "Midori's right!"

"Since when did you agree with me?" Midori cocked a brow. "That's just not commen sense right there!"

"Why don't you shove a chicken's ass in your head!" Sasuke huffed.

"I thought that you do that!" Midori snickered.

"Why does everyone have to snocker?!" Naruto groaned.

"I think you mean snicker." Sakura corrected.

"That's what I said, snocker!" Naruto was in denial.

"Idiot..." Sasuke mumbled.

"What about the stupid plan?" Itachi crouched down to Dolly's height.

"Oh yeah!" Dolly nodded her head. "So all we need is Gaara, Roxn, a dirty sock, Sasori I mean-Deather's car, Itachi's hair, Haku's make up, A gorilla suit and a monkey!"

"Why would we need all that?" Itachi cocked a brow.

"Honestly, I don't know!" Dolly nodded her head. "What's my name bitches?"

"What does that have anything to do with... anything?" Neji backed away from Dolly.

"Let's just get them together!" Sakura was beginning to get impatient.

"Why are we putting them together?" Nami huffed. "They don't even match!"

"But, they both have chapped lips!" Haku exclaimed.

"true, true..." Nami nodded her head.

"Screw this nut case!" Midori left with Haku. "I'm gonna go get Haku a woman!"

"Count me in" Naruto tagged along.

"Wait!" Neji called out. "I'm still available!"

"Cool!" Dolly skipped after them.

"Fwee!" Sakura giggled and caught up with Dolly.

"Wait for me!!!" Tenten ran after them.

"So much for Gaara!" Sasuke rolled his eyes leaving Nami and Itachi to talk.

"You wanna go somewhere?" Itachi turned to Nami.

"Sure!" Nami shrugged and walked away with Itachi.

"Okay people!" Midori got all the girl candidates in a line. She looked at every girl in line that is... until she found one girl who looked really familier.

"Neji!" Midori crossed her arms. "Girl Daters only!"

"I can look like a girl!" Neji frowned.

"Looking like a girl and being a girl are two different things!" Sakura exclaimed.

"but-"

"Leave!" Midori cut Neji off and pointed at the exit.

"awww..." Neji reluctantly dragged his feet to the exit. But suddenly he turned around to protest. "If I could just-"

"LEAVE!" Midori gritted her teeth.

"aww..." He left.

"Okay!" Midori called out. "Girl number one!"

"Hi!" Girl number one appeared. "My name's Neji...llian! That's right! My name's Nejillian!"
"Go home Neji!" Midori rolled her eyes.

Girl number two had a gazillion moles on her face, Girl number three had no breasts, Girl number four had big breasts but not enough big booty, Girl number five had BIG breasts BIG booty... she was just plain huge!

"oh god!" Sakura groaned. "It's been like two hours already!"

"I agree with Sakura!" Tenten exclaimed.

"I didn't even make a statement!" Sakura rolled her eyes.

"I meant to say, That we should just give up!" Tenten explained. "Let's face it! There's no girl for Haku! Haku's good at being gay and that's all!"

"Maybe you're right!" Midori threw the papers in her hand in the air.

"Hey!" Haku tried to catch the papers. "That was my math homework!"

"This whole 'let's get Haku a girlfriend' thing ain't workin' out!" Sasuke muttered.

"It pains me to say this, but Neji was the hottest girl I've seen in this program thing!" Haku exclaimed.

"Really?" Neji squeaked. "I-I mean what bitch!?"

"ooooooo Neji!" Sakura nudged him with her shoulder.

"What are you doing?" Roxn walked in with Gaara.

"Are you guys selling products?" Gaara leaped.

"no." they replied.

"Why'd you think that?" Sakura cocked a brow.

"Cause there's like alot of video camera's." Gaara exclaimed.

"What video camera?" Naruto swung his head around.

"Just kidding!" Gaara giggled.

"I have a question for you two." Midori eyed Gaara and Roxn suspiciously.

"What have you been doing the last twenty four hours?"

"What kind of question is that?" Gaara cocked a brow.

"That is the wrong answer!" Midori slapped him.

"What was that for?" He rubbed his cheek.

"Wrong answer!" Naruto came up this time and slapped Gaara across the cheek.

"H-hey!" Gaara rubbed his other cheek.

"Wrong answer!" Haku slapped his head. "Spit it out Buster!"

"He dosen't know what you're talking about!" Roxn helped Gaara up and stood in front of him in defense. "And his name ain't Buster! It's Gaara Zap Sabaku!"

"Don't you even think for a second that I-"

"We!" Sakura corrected Midori.

"We can't see through your phony game! Cause we can! We can see, Roxn! We can see!" Midori pointed accusingly at Gaara then at Roxn.

"What phony game?" Now it was Gaara's turn to defend Roxn. "We don't know what you're talking about!"

"Come on everyone!" Midori started for the door but no one bothered to follow her. Why won't they follow her? Maybe they were going against everything she believed in. Donuts, Yams, jell, pickles... But you'll find out what happens later. but for now...

Short story time!

Short Story: Starring my reviewers!

Title: The apocalypse!

AkariUreshii:The apocalypse!

katanna uchiha: What the hell is an apocalypse?

MoonAngel8: I love seahorses!

kuro okami: Why seahorses?

MoonAngel8: Cause I love the sea and I like horses!

lil_vietgurl: You're conversation is stupid!

Yuna Ito: xXMelissaXx became prettier!

xXMelissaXx: H-hi everyone...

Everyone: Woah! You're right Yuna! She's a total babe!

AkariUreshii: It's the apocalypse!

Yuna Ito: What the hell is an apocalypse?

kuro okami: I have no clue...

x dolly: Girls rule!

AkariUreshii: The apocalypse!

I'm Gay: I need a woman!

AkariUreshii: The apocalypse!

Everyone: What the hell is an apocalypse?!

Potato Head Mistress: *Walks in* Hi!

Everyone:AHHHHH! It's the apocalypse! *Runs away*

Potato Head Mistress: All the flour spillt on me...

Everyone: AHHHH!!!

Potato Head Mistress: I'm not an apocalypse! whatever that is...

Now let's get back to the story:

"Hello people?" Midori snapped her fingers to get their attention.

"allright! Allright!" the got to their feet and followed her abandoning Gaara and Roxn.

"I think we just got kicked out of Idiot Brigade!" Gaara and Roxn gasped.

Did they get kicked out? or did they just get the wrong idea? Is the Idiot Brigade falling apart? They just got started! Well hopefully they don't get into some sort of war!

A/N: Oh my gawd! what the hell did I just do? Idiot Brigade splits up? NO WAY! but i'm afraid it's meant to be... katanna.. I didn't get your email but I replied like two times... I'm so sorry!