Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Photograph ❯ Challenge ( Chapter 20 )

Theme #20: the road home

 

----

 

To Gaara, Konoha smelled wrong. Everything was damp, and anything left outside for too long would be covered with plant life of one kind or another. As he passed through the massive gates of the hidden village, he decided that he preferred the sharp, clean smell of the desert. While he would not miss the water rationing, he was willing to do it in exchange for leaving that damp, decaying smell behind.

 

It also seemed that he was the only one that thought that way. Temari was already going on about the public bath house. Gaara could not comprehend why sitting in hot water with naked strangers would be an appealing way to spend time. And she was not the only one excited to be back in the Hidden Leaf village. As soon as they had crossed from sand to forest, Lee had become even more energetic then usual. It was the Konoha-nin's first trip home in nearly a year. He pointed out plant and animal life to the tolerant genin that were traveling with them. At least it stopped the loud, bizarre, and supposedly encouraging speeches about the upcoming chunin exams.

 

The genin had never been outside of Suna, and they stared with wide eyes as they walked through the village. Gaara ignored the babbling and Lee's loud comments. He would stop by Tsunade's office, then retreat to the visitor's quarters.

 

“Gai-sensei!”

 

“Lee!”

 

“Gai-sensei!”

 

“Lee!”

 

Kankuro stopped his casual stroll and clamped his hands over his ears to block out the yelling. “What the hell?”

 

Lee pounded past them to grab onto a man in an identical outfit while tears ran down both men's faces. The sand shifted restlessly before Gaara could identify the man that was now embracing Lee. `Maito Gai. His former teacher. If I remember correctly, they do this often, but they do not have a physical relationship. Lee considers him a mentor.' The sand settled again.

 

Kankuro slowly uncovered his ears. “I forgot. There's two of them.”

 

The genin Ami shook one of her teammates and pointed. “That must be Gai-sensei, the one that Lee-sensei told us so much about! The greatest teacher ever!”

 

Her teammate Seiji tipped his head to the side. “I thought he'd be taller.”

 

“And this wasn't a dead give away that he's gay?” Temari made a face and turned away from the display. “I'm going to go check the schedule for the exams.”

 

Making sure to stay quiet so that Temari couldn't hear him, Kankuro leaned over to his brother's ear. “Which is code for, `I'm going to go find that pineapple head and fuck his brains out'.”

 

Gaara flicked a glance at his brother, silently agreeing. His brother's sense of humor was making more sense to him these days. He made a quick, dismissive gesture at the two jounin teachers that were in charge of the genin. The teachers herded their students away, most likely to find some dinner before heading to their quarters. The Kazekage and his brother continued to the Hokage's tower on their own.

 

“I mean, honestly, can you imagine the hair their kids would have? We see Temari with her hair down every morning, and I can only imagine what Shikamaru's hair does.” Kankuro shifted his scrolls and scared off some little kid with a glower. “Damn, I hope they don't reproduce.”

 

“Hm.” Gaara had been thinking the exact same thing, but more because the cross of lazy and temperamental would probably result in some truly obnoxious shinobi.

 

“So, we drop in, say `hi, how ya doin'', and then we can grab dinner, right? Lee is going to acting ridiculous with Bushy Brows Senior for awhile, and I don't even want to know what Temari's going to be doing.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Great. I'm starving.”

 

“You are always starving.”

 

Kankuro looked miffed. “I have a very high metabolism.”

 

Once inside of the tower, a woman clad in a black kimono immediately escorted them into Tsunade's office. The legendary sannin was sitting behind a desk overflowing with papers, a cup of sake in her hand. No matter why he was visiting, Gaara always seemed to find her in the exact same place.

 

“Welcome back to Konoha, Kazekage.”

 

Gaara nodded. “Hokage.”

 

“I hear that you brought six genin this time. That's more then expected.”

 

“Yes. One team has recently made considerable progress.”

 

Tsunade's eyes narrowed. “Could that have anything to do with a certain taijutsu specialist, who just happens to be a good teacher, and who came here with your genin today?”

 

Kankuro hissed, “Busted.”

 

“Rock Lee was one of the instructors for that genin team, yes.” Gaara ignored his brother's commentary to focus on the increasingly agitated woman in front of him.

 

“Well, it's just great that you're getting some use out of him. And when, exactly, are you giving my jounin back?”

 

Gaara crossed his arms. “Lee was assigned to Suna indefinitely.”

 

Tsunade went to her feet, hands smacking against her desk. “That doesn't mean you get to just keep him! You know damn well that mostly sane jounin are hard to come by, and he is number one in his field!”

 

“Number one? Bushy brows?” Kankuro scratched under his hood.

 

“Yeah. Rock Lee is number one for taijutsu in just about every bingo book. He passed Gai up about a year ago.” Tsunade took a deep breath and sat back down. “We're not talking about some little chunin that followed you home. We're talking about a very effective specialist. I want him back.”

 

“No.”

 

“No? That's it? You are just going to keep my jounin?”

 

“Yes. Rock Lee is staying in Suna.”

 

Kankuro shrugged. “We could always trade for Temari . . . “

 

Tsunade looked thoughtful, but said nothing when the sand escaped from its gourd to hiss around Gaara's feet. “No.”

 

“It's really simple. I am the Hokage, and Lee is a Konoha shinobi. I assigned him to Suna, and I can recall him.” Tsunade folded her hands under her chin.

 

“I will not release him.”

 

“Look, you little brat, you can't just go and steal my jounin!”

 

Gaara's eyes narrowed when he heard `brat'. “Yes, I can.”

 

“You're serious.” The Hokage set her chin on her folded hands. “You'll fight me.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Fine.” Tsunade stood back up, sending her chair slamming into the wall, where it broke into a dozen pieces and cracked the plaster. “Main street, nine o' clock tonight. We'll settle this. Bring a second. Shizune! You're my second!”

 

Kankuro's jaw dropped. “What?”

 

“I'm challenging you, Gaara of the Desert. Winner gets Rock Lee assigned to them. Permanently.”

 

Gaara nodded sharply before turning and leaving the room with the sand swirling around his feet and his brother trailing behind.

 

----

 

“Oh, come on, Sasuke-temee, it's a great story! Anyways, I'm walking down the street, minding my own business, when I hear a moan. Now, it's something like two in the morning, so I figure someone's drunk and lost. I head towards the alleyway, expecting to find Tsunade-baachan flat on her face. Instead I find this bastard, making out like some hormonally crazed teenager!” Naruto stumbled when the last of the Uchiha's elbow connected with his stomach. “What the hell, bastard?”

 

“We were not making out.” Sasuke walked into the bar, pointedly letting the door shut on his teammate.

 

Naruto didn't even notice. “The hell you weren't! And that's not even the best part. The best part is who he was giving a hickie to. It was . . . “

 

“Gaara!”

 

“Huh? That's not it.” Naruto scratched at his head. “And it's not a pretty picture, either.”

 

“No, no.” Lee pointed, directing the blonde shinobi's gaze. “Gaara-kun is here! And he is . . . “

 

Sasuke tipped his head to the side. “I didn't know the Kazekage played poker.”

 

“Neither did I.” Lee left his two friends behind to push his way through the crowd surrounding the card game. “Hi, Kazekage-sama! I did not know that you played poker. Hello, Hokage-sama, Shizune-san, Kankuro-san.”

 

Gaara scowled at his cards, rearranging them, then laid two on the table and accepted two new ones from the dealer, Kakashi. “I do not usually play.”

 

“Oh.” Lee leaned over Gaara's shoulder to see his cards and winced. It didn't look like his precious person had a lot of luck with games of chance. He straightened up and smiled brightly at the other players. “Is this a time for strengthening the bonds between our villages?”

 

Tsunade smirked at the Kazekage. “You could say that.”

 

“Oh, for the love of . . . “ Kankuro discarded three cards. “This is Tsunade's idea of a challenge. She was fighting with Gaara, and she challenged him. Of course, we had no fucking idea that she wanted to play poker, of all the . . . “

 

“You want to keep complaining, kid?” The Hokage rapped her fingers on the table, cracking the wood.

 

The puppet-nin stared at the crack with morbid fascination before turning his attention back to Lee. “The winner gets you.”

 

The perfect smile faltered. “Huh?”

 

“You heard him. You're going to be assigned to whoever wins all of the chips.” The Hokage counted out ten chips and threw them in the center. “Permanently.”

 

“But, but . . . “ Lee stared at the four players. “Do I get a say?”

 

The table chorused, “No.”

 

“Oh.” A familiar laugh was coming from the bar, and Lee beat a hasty retreat towards that sound. “Naruto-kun! You will not believe what they are doing!”

 

“The girls just filled us in.” Naruto's drink sloshed as he burst out laughing again. “Only you, bushy brows!”

 

Sakura and Ino both glared at the hysterically laughing shinobi, and even Hinata looked exasperated. Ten-ten had her head on the bar, laughing so hard that tears were running down her face.

 

The pink haired medic thumped her teammate on the head. “Knock it off! Better this then having the two Kage's destroying the village. I'm rather proud of Tsunade-shishou for coming up with this.”

 

“Ow! Come on, Sakura-chan. It's funny!” Naruto rubbed his head and moved away from his attacker.

 

Lee went up on his tiptoes to peer over the crowd. “So, does anyone know how they are doing?”

 

“So far, Tsunade and Kankuro are in the lead.” Ino was perched on top of the bar with an excellent view of the game.

 

“Not a surprise.” Temari emerged from the crowd and leaned over the bar, snagging a beer while the bartender was distracted. “Gaara sucks at poker.”

 

“Temari-san! Gaara-kun is . . . “

 

“I heard, I heard.” The sand-nin leaned against the bar, Shikamaru next to her. “I had to come down and see this for myself.”

 

“I would have thought that poker would be a good game for Gaara.” Sasuke dumped Naruto off of his bar stool and sat down. “Bluffing would be easy for him.”

 

“Bastard!”

 

Temari snorted. “Sure, if we could get the idea of bluffing into his head. He plays exactly what he has.”

 

“And he's getting his ass kicked.” Ino patted Lee on the top of his head. “Your boyfriend is going to be out in a couple more hands at this rate.”

 

“B-boyfriend? Who . . . who said he was . . . “ Lee turned scarlet, nervously looking around to see who else had heard her.

 

Sakura rolled her eyes and sipped at her cosmo. “The whole village knows, Lee.”

 

“How?”

 

All eyes turned to the noisy, hyperactive blonde that was in the middle of draining his beer. “What?”

 

“Naruto-kun!”

 

“Oh, no, don't blame this one on me. I told just one person.” Naruto pointed at Sasuke.

 

Sasuke pointed at Sakura. “I only told Sakura, since she is on our team.”

 

Blushing, Sakura gestured at her best friend. “I did kind of let it slip to Ino . . . “

 

“Chouji was asking about Shikamaru, and it just kind of came up!”

 

Lee dragged a hand over his face.

 

“There's that famous Konoha security.” Temari sighed and shook her head. “No wonder I can't kill the rumor in Suna. I think it's time to throw in the towel and get out of the closet, Lee.”

 

“Really?” The taijutsu master rather liked the idea of not having to keep things secret, even if they had never been very good at it.

 

“Might as well at this point. Blah, I need something stronger.” Temari checked for the bartender, then snagged herself a bottle of scotch and two glasses. “Want some, Shikamaru?”

 

`It's not a secret anymore? Just like that? Well, the only reason I was trying to keep it quiet was because Temari wanted us to. And if everyone already knows . . . ` Lee smiled brightly and raised his orange juice in a toast. “Yosh!”

 

“Uh oh. Bad news, Lee. Gaara's out.” Ino gave Lee another pat on the head.

 

“What?” The green clad shinobi clambered up onto the bar next to Ino, frantic eyes finding the poker table beyond the crowd.

 

“It's all up to Kankuro now.”

 

Sakura climbed up next to them, carefully balancing her drink. “Is Kankuro any good at poker?”

 

“I have no idea.” Lee fidgeted with his glass. “I did not know that either of them knew how to play.”

 

Chuckling, Temari pulled herself up to Sakura, ignoring the bartender's protests. “Kankuro's actually pretty good. Much better then Gaara, anyways.”

 

“You kids get down from there!”

 

All three kunoichi made vague, shooing gestures at the bartender.

 

“What's going on?” Whining, Naruto started to pull himself up, only to be yanked back down by Sasuke. “What's the deal, bastard?”

 

“I think Shizune has something. She just put half of her chips in. So did Tsunade.” Sakura leaned down to Hinata. “Hey, can you see what they have with Byakugan?”

 

“Sure.” With a little help from Sakura, a fourth kunoichi settled on the bar. “Kankuro set his cards down; I can't see them anymore.”

 

A small groan came from Lee. “He folded!”

 

“Shizune just went all in. And there goes Tsunade! What do they have, Hinata?” Sakura leaned so far forward that she was in danger of toppling off the bar and caused two patrons to develop sudden nose bleeds.

 

“That doesn't make any sense.” Hinata rubbed her activated eyes and looked again. “Why are they both going all in?”

 

Ino gave the Hyuuga heiress a shake. “Come on! What have they got?”

 

“Nothing.”

 

“What?”

 

The noise level jumped as the two women revealed their cards. Tsunade whooped and pulled the chips in, even as Kakashi stared at their cards, struck silent by the sight of them both going all in when the best either of them had was a single jack. They had both been bluffing.

 

“Damn it all, I should have stayed in!” Kankuro flipped his discarded cards, revealing a pair of twos. “What the fuck.”

 

Lee slumped, receiving several sympathetic pats on the back from the kunoichi that surrounded him.

 

“Don't worry about it, Kankuro's still in.”

 

“Shove over.” Ten-ten squished Lee to the side so she could sit next to him.

 

“But, what if he loses?” Lee wailed. “I do not want to be permanently assigned to Konoha! It is my home, to be certain, and precious to me, as are my youthful friends here, but my precious person is in Suna, and I do not want to be separated from his youthful energy!”

 

Ten-ten whacked him on the back of the head. “Snap out of it, Lee!”

 

“Ten-ten . . . “

 

“Since when have you been a quitter?”

 

Lee's eyes flew wide. “What?”

 

“You heard me. Don't sit here and whine. If Kankuro loses, you'll just find a different way.”

 

“Yosh!” Lee jumped to his feet on top of the bar. “With determination and hard work I will seize the full blossom of youth with my precious Gaara-kun!”

 

The room went silent, all eyes on the proudly posing shinobi.

 

“What. The. Fuck.”

 

Leaning around Lee's legs, Sakura hissed at Ten-ten, “You did that on purpose!”

 

“Yeah. Neiji bet me that I couldn't get him to stand on the bar and declare his intentions.”

 

Temari had a hand clamped over her eyes. “That's one way to come out of the closet.”

 

----

 

“What. The. Fuck.” Kankuro twisted in his seat, looking back at the bar. Sure enough, bushy brows was standing on the bar and posing. `My brother's taste in men sucks.'

 

Kakashi cleared his throat, bringing everyone's attention back to the table. Kankuro fanned his cards and studied them. `Promising, but not fantastic.' He picked two and dropped them on the table. His opponent discarded one card, openly smirking at him.

 

`Okay, she only smirks when she actually has something. She leans forward and pushes her chest out when she's bluffing. Damn good distraction. So she's actually got something.' He accepted his two new cards, but kept his eyes on the blonde across the table. `There. Her pupils dilated. She got what she needed.'

 

Already resigning himself to folding, Kankuro finally looked at his own hand. `Holy fucking shit.' He had never, ever seen one of these in real life. He didn't actually believe that they existed until that very moment. His breathing kept trying to accelerate, but he fought it back. He didn't want to waste this.

 

Tsunade tossed a handful of chips in, still smirking. Returning her smirk, Kankuro matched her, and tossed in fifteen more. “So, deciding to play for real?”

 

“You could say that.” She tossed out thirty more chips. “Got the balls for it?”

 

“I've got balls to spare.” Kankuro shoved half of his pile into the center. “Let's play for real.”

 

“Kid, I was playing this game before you were born.” Tsunade shoved her chips in, raising by another fifteen.

 

“That just means your past your prime.” The pot was raised another twenty.

 

Chakra jumped as Tsunade glared at her opponent. “Oh, you think so, brat?” All of the remaining chips were shoved into the pot. “Put up or shut up.”

 

Grinning like a mad man, Kankuro pushed in the last of his chips. “Done.”

 

“Amateur.” Tsunade's cards dropped to the table, revealing a queen high straight flush. The crowd started yelling, some clapping for their Hokage.

 

“Damn. I've never seen one of those.” As the Hokage started to reach for the chips, Kankuro slammed his own cards down. “But I've never seen one of these, either! Read `em and weep, oh legendary sucker! Royal flush!”

 

The room went dead silent before exploding in an uproar.

 

“No way. There is no way he got a royal flush at the exact same time I had a straight flush. Kakashi, did he cheat?”

 

The sharingan user shook his head. “The only one cheating was Shizune, and she sucked at it.”

 

The Hokage stared at her assistant. “Shizune?”

 

“You know poker's not my game! I play black jack!”

 

“We'll talk about this later.” Tsunade sagged in her chair, pulling out a scroll. “Congratulations, Kankuro. You are now the proud owner of a Rock Lee.”

 

Kankuro caught the tossed scroll, staring at it in delight. He beat two Kages in a challenge. It was going to make a fucking awesome story. Chuckling, he rolled the scroll around in his hand. Gods knew he would never let his brother live this down.

 

`Speaking of which . . . ` Kankuro turned to his brother. Gaara was sitting in his chair, expression completely neutral, but his eyes never left the scroll. “Hey, kid. I've got an early birthday present for you. Hope it fits.”

 

He tossed the scroll up in the air, letting the sand snatch it away. Still smiling broadly, he sat back to watch his brother open the scroll and read it. Gaara looked at him and nodded. `For him, he might as well be hugging me and screaming thank you at the tops of his lungs. It's nice to spoil him once in a while. Even if he is a pain in the ass.'

 

“Thank you, Kankuro-san!”

 

Before he could even blink, Kankuro found himself being hugged by Lee. Very tightly. `Can't . . . breathe . . . `

 

“Put him down, Lee.”

 

“Of course, Gaara-kun.” Lee set Kankuro back down in his chair.

 

“My fucking ribs.” Groaning, the puppet-nin stood up. “Don't ever hug me again and we'll call it even.”

 

“Okay, Kankuro-san.” Lee was still beaming and bouncing with joy. With another bounce, he planted a quick kiss on Gaara and whispered something to him.

 

All that smiling and bouncing made Kankuro's head hurt.

 

“We are leaving.” Gaara took a hold of his new jounin's arm, steering him towards the exit.

 

Kankuro winced. “Can you guys get that making out crap done with before we get back? Guest quarters are a lot smaller then the house.”

 

Lee went scarlet while his brother ignored him and walked out the door, jounin in tow.

 

`Crap. They better keep any celebratory sex in their own damn room.'

 

Tsunade stared after the two men. “You know, I sent him to Suna to stop those rumors. I wasn't planning on him deciding to prove them all right. Especially right in the middle of a bar.”

 

“You get used to it after awhile.” The sudden, overwhelming urge for a drink drove Kankuro to the bar. There he found a row of kunoichi, long legs draped over the edge of the bar while they giggled and pushed at each other. `Hot damn. I just need to block Temari out of the picture and I'm in heaven. Konoha sure knows how to grow them. Look at the legs on that blonde. Any luck, and I won't be heading back to the guest quarters at all tonight.'

 

In much better spirits, Kankuro accepted the beer Temari had snagged for him. His eyes were locked on the group of deadly, beautiful women all lined up like a display at a candy shop. `Where to start. I remember Sakura. Complete firecracker, and probably a complete wildcat in bed. That's the girl Temari whomped all those years ago. When did she get those curves? I don't think she's wearing a bra. Damn, look at the jugs on the white eyed girl! Judges, I think we have a winner.' He moved down the row to lean up against the bar, casually dragging his eyes over the blushing young woman while pushing his hood back. “Hi.”

 

The white eyes rolled up in their sockets and the kunoichi collapsed, falling behind the bar.

 

“What the hell did you do to her?” Temari dropped behind the bar to rescue the heiress.

 

“Nothing! I said hi!”

 

The blonde with the amazing legs nudged him with her knee. “From her, that's a good sign.”

 

The ridiculous little skirt she was wearing had ridden all the way up to her hips, giving him a quick flash of white panties. `I love Konoha.'