Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The Chronicles of Kakashi & the Kunoichi from Thunder Country ❯ A Strained Strange Relationship ( Chapter 12 )

 

A Strained Strange Relationship

 

At the jounin graduation ceremony, the candidates stood on stage, some anxiously, some impatiently, a few indifferently, waiting for their diploma scrolls. Sandaime and his advisors sat patiently through each other's inspirational speeches, waiting to hand out the scrolls and congratulate the new jounin. The Hokage looked happily at the line of jounin graduates. `Not bad this year, quite a few, Konoha will be in good hands in the future. Now if I could only find a suitable replacement for myself.'

 

The mentors for the candidates stood proudly in the audience. Gai was standing next to his eternal rival, so he just had to say, “You know Kakashi, it's a good thing Otori Rikako decided to lose you as her mentor and chose me instead. In less than a year, she's already made jounin. Really, Kakashi, with her talent, you should have done more...”

 

“Hmm? Did you say something?” Kakashi asked in his usual bored way.

 

“Arrgh! He did it to me again! Damn his cool flippant attitude!” Gai grabbed his head and twisted his hair and body in frustration.

 

Heads turned and faces frowned, shushing Gai into silence.

 

Kakashi thought resignedly, `She didn't need either of us to make jounin, she just needed to be ready.'

 

As the graduates were called one by one, the Hokage handed each a scroll tied with a gold ribbon.

 

Her name was called next. Instead of wearing the usual blue shinobi uniform like most of the others, she was uncharacteristically dressed up in a beautiful blood red dress studded with pearls, and embroidered with birds and flowers in colorful silken threads. The dress was sleeveless, proudly exposing all the scars on her arms. But despite the high slit in the skirt and the lack of sleeves, it was a relatively conservative dress with a high neck mandarin collar. Her loose hair rippled and cascaded down her back. It was longer than it had ever been. She smiled broadly, genuinely, as she received her scroll.

 

Gai stepped forward to give her a big bear hug as she walked off the stage. Kakashi watched them intensely. After congratulating her, Gai turned his attention to his next pupil. Rikako looked around for her parents, but her former sensei caught her eye and he moved forward to greet her. He hadn't seen her since their last session.

 

“Rikako-chan, congratulations, I knew it wouldn't be long...” he started to say.

 

“Excuse me, Kakashi-sensei, I have my jounin scroll now, so I'm your peer and colleague. I'll be teaching at the Academy this year. It is appropriate that you address me as sensei.” She bowed, excused herself and walked over to her parents without looking back.

 

Kakashi sighed as he watched her walk away.

 

The lovely kunoichi Kurenai sauntered mischievously over to Kakashi. “Must be terrible to have feelings for someone who won't give you the time of day.”

 

Kakashi replied in his usual nonchalant manner, “I don't know what you're talking about.”

 

Kurenai laughed, “It's quite obvious - you've had your eye on her all during the ceremony.”

 

He ignored her. `Another gossip monger. How does Asuma put up with it?'

 

Despite his lack of response, Kurenai continued, “Well, if it makes you feel any better, it's just as obvious she has a crush on you. Why else would a woman hold a grudge for so long? I don't need sharingan or byakugan powers to see that.” She practically skipped back to Asuma, then giggled and whispered new shinobi gossip in his ear.

 

Kakashi seriously dwelled on her words. Was it possible? Or was Kurenai just getting back at him for teasing her about Asuma all those years ago?

 

-…-…-…-…-

 

`Seeing her again was…disturbing. I was able to put those feelings behind me,' Kakashi insisted to himself even though deep down he knew it wasn't true. She was still there in the back of his mind and trying not to think of her made him think of her all the more. The year had passed uneventfully, which gave him too much time to think about his solitary life. He missed her, her ethical questions, her moral ambivalence, her informational ramblings, even her snide remarks. He missed their training sessions and he wondered how much more she improved.

 

`Gai's not a better teacher than I am, is he? Does she respect him more? But he's such an idiot! No I'm the idiot. After all, he has no problem expressing his feelings, though he does go overboard. What would you do, Obito? Would you like her? Probably, you liked everyone.' Obito, Rin - Kakashi often felt he needed their approval to move on with his life, to be happy, when theirs were so unfairly cut short. `But what do I do now? She's not like the others.'

 

He had thought that if he were ever to fall in love, it would be with someone like Rin. Ironically, though they were both medic-nin, there the comparison ended. Sweet Rin who followed him around like a love sick puppy. Aloof Rikako who hid her emotions under layers of sarcasm. `What should I do?'

 

Well, there was nothing he could do when she didn't even want to talk to him. So that was that. It was for the best; after all, considering their history, it just wasn't a good idea. But he just wanted to know what would it feel like to be with someone he really cared about. The veteran shinobi forcibly pushed aside his thoughts and feelings. School was out and there were no classes or training sessions for a few weeks, just the occasional mission. It was time he got out of bed to visit the shinobi memorial as he had done practically every day for the past two decades. He thought again about his best friend and their last mission together and sighed.

 

When he arrived at the shinobi memorial, there was someone already there, sitting by the black oblique stone. It was a pretty petite young woman dressed in black with long dark hair, erratically braided in the back. Several books and scrolls were piled around her and she looked as if she were busy. Kakashi hesitated, remembering their last encounter, but decided to greet her. To his surprise she rose first and bowed respectfully.

 

“Kakashi-sensei, I hereby offer the deepest sincerest apologies for my behavior towards you during the jounin graduation. It was completely uncalled for and I hope you can forgive me in the spirit of our becoming colleagues and allies.”

 

Kakashi was amused despite trying hard not to feel anything. Sometimes she had the funniest way of expressing herself.

 

“It's okay. You had a right to be mad at me. I didn't treat you well. I dropped your training too abruptly.” He wanted to tell her more, but was still unsure if it was wise and instead changed the subject. “So what are you doing here with all this reading material?”

 

“Well, as you know, I've been appointed assistant historian and I'm trying to put together a complete text chronicling the sacrifices of the shinobi engraved on this memorial. I'm here for inspiration. These names here, were they friends of yours?”

 

“How did you know?”

 

“According to the death records, they were ANBU members and died during the time you were active in the ANBU. I checked to see if you were in the same platoon at the time.”

 

“You sure did your research,” Kakashi said, impressed.

 

“Thank you, I've been working on and off this project for years.” (Actually, her father told her.) “It didn't seem right that there is this memorial, but no history to go with it. They should be acknowledged for their individual actions as well as sacrificing their lives for Konoha. Did you know that this one here invented the foldable shuriken and this one holds the record for…”

 

The petite kunoichi continued to impart information about the various names. Much of it Kakashi already knew and he was scarcely listening. Instead, he was observing her. Excitement shone in her dark dark eyes. Here was something she loved, not the fighting required of a shinobi. She was at home with her books and scrolls.

 

She paused every so often to wave a lock of a hair from her face and to tuck it behind her ear. But then she stopped speaking. He didn't notice that she noticed that he wasn't listening.

 

“Well, I'm sure you're busy and I've already taken up too much of your time. Please excuse me. I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing.” Annoyed, she sat down and picked up a scroll.

 

Kakashi again debated with himself whether he should tell her. `Why is it so hard? Why can't I just come out and say it? I might never get another opportunity.' He thought of Rin, how he couldn't return her feelings until it was too late. It was so long ago. `If I could live my life over, but I can't…so this chance, no matter how slim, even if she laughs in my face…I have to say something.' And yet he prayed for some enemies to suddenly drop down on them so he would have another excuse. But none appeared.

 

`What would you do, Obito? Would you tell her? You didn't tell Rin, but that was because of me. What would you tell me to do now? Would you be satisfied with the way I've lived my life since you've been gone? Or do you still think I'm the idiot? I've changed since then, but perhaps not enough.'

 

`Just tell her you idiot!' said the Obito voice which popped into his head on rare occasions.

 

Encourage by his long dead friend, Kakashi finally said, “I was just thinking about why I... I want you to know why...I was holding you back. You couldn't reach your full potential with me as your sensei. You became too important to me and I couldn't advise you objectively.”

 

“What do you mean by important?” she asked intensely, focusing on that one word, looking at him directly.

 

`She's forcing me to say it. Why is it harder than taking a life?' But he could say nothing, do nothing, but avert his eye from her gaze. It was so much easier for him to take a life than reveal his feelings. Maybe because that was something he was used to doing. All these years he had lived by the old shinobi adage - never reveal your emotions.

 

But she persisted, “How am I important? I am important to you like a good friend, or a sister, or a colleague, or something more?”

 

Kakashi scratched his head uncomfortably, but the multiple choice made it easier. “Something more,” he finally admitted.

 

She was quiet for a long while, thinking over his words. Kakashi started to squirm and to think he had made a mistake after all. “Let me see your face,” she finally said. It was more like an order than a request.

 

He looked at her, surprised at her response. He had romantically imagined she'd throw herself at him. Wasn't that what normal women do? “Is how I look that important to you?” he replied.

 

“No, but whether you trust me is.” She continued to stare at him unrelentingly.

 

He hesitated, nodded and pulled down the mask covering the lower half of his face. He met her gaze confidently now and felt her eyes moving over his entire face and tracing his scar.

 

She rose up and walked over to him, then slowly reached up with her right hand to caress his left cheek. “How handsome. Why do you hide it?” she asked curiously.

 

“Well, I can't have every girl in the village falling at my feet. I was waiting for someone special to come along.”

 

She began to laugh, and laugh, and laugh, a bit too much, almost hysterically.

 

`It wasn't that funny,' he thought.

 

“I'm s…sor...sorry...but that sounds like a line from one of those books you're always reading. Hah! Hah!” and she continued to laugh.

 

Gone was the confidence he had just a short while ago. His face turned an uncharacteristic shade of red. Embarrassed, he started to raise his hands to pull up his mask again, but her small hands grabbed his larger ones, stopping their motion. She tip-toed to plant an innocent kiss on his scarred cheek and whispered in his ear shyly, “You're important to me, too.”

 

-…-…-…-…-…-