Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The Theatre ❯ CRACK!Rent ( Chapter 2 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Kilane 
This chapter is INDEED on drugs. I have a feeling that this is probably the most random one. Stuff's twisted around and sprinkled with crack, and it makes NO sense. XD
Later I'll get into the High School Musical songs (well, two of them). Their sole purpose was to annoy my brother, who would rather jump off a cliff than watch it again. XD
This chapter was rather hard to do, considering the characters were all over the place.
Enjoy the confusion.
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 06.09.2006 | Pages: 4 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 189 | Status: Work In Progress
This chapter is INDEED on drugs. I have a feeling that this is probably the most random one. Stuff's twisted around and sprinkled with crack, and it makes NO sense. XD
Later I'll get into the High School Musical songs (well, two of them). Their sole purpose was to annoy my brother, who would rather jump off a cliff than watch it again. XD
This chapter was rather hard to do, considering the characters were all over the place.
Enjoy the confusion.
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 06.09.2006 | Pages: 4 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 189 | Status: Work In Progress
---
- Rent:Rent -
AKA CRACK!Rent
---
*Naruto is riding his bike after an afternoon of annoying everyone with his new camera. No one really cared for the constant camera lens being shoved in their faces at Ichiraku, so they kicked Naruto out. Poor Naruto. He's had a bad day, and he's prepared to sing about it. And that's just what he's gonna do.*
Naruto: *riding his bike and zooming through the streets*
How do you document real life
When real life's getting more
Like manga each day?
Headlines - bread-lines (what does that MEAN?)
Blow my mind
And now this fricking deadline
How do you document real life
When real life's getting more
Like manga each day?
Headlines - bread-lines (what does that MEAN?)
Blow my mind
And now this fricking deadline
“Eviction or PAAAAAAAAY”!!
RENT!
Sasuke: *back at his apartment, cleaning up after Sakura again* *stops cleaning after finding a box of candles Sakura had left* *picks up guitar and plays Mary Had a Little Lamb*
How do you write a song
When the chords sound wrong,
Though they once sounded right and rare?
When the notes are sour
Where is the POWER!!!!
You once had to ignite the air…?
Naruto: *still riding* *almost to the apartment*
We're hungry and frozen!
Sasuke: *throws guitar*
Phht! Some life that we've chosen!
Together:
How we gonna pay…
How we gonna PAAAAY…
How WE gonna PAAAAY…?
LAST YEAR'S REEEEEENT!
Naruto: *bursts into apartment and trips on box of candles* *curses and throws them out the window*
We light those FRICKING candles!!
Sasuke:
How do you start a fire
When there's nothing to burn except crack
And it feels like something's stuck in your flute? Or guitar, in this case.
Naruto:
How can you generate heat
When you can't feel your feet
Both:
And they're turning BLUE! It's cold, man!
Naruto:
You light up a mean blaze!
Sasuke: *sets Naruto's posters of Sakura on fire*
With your posters --
Naruto: *burns Sasuke's rejected script of a series called Sasuke*
And screenplays!
Both:
How we gonna pay…
How we gonna PAAAAY…
How WE gonna PAAAAY?
LAST YEAR'S REEEEENT!!
Ino: *on the mean streets of Konoha in a phone booth* *on the phone trying to get Temari to haul ass*
Don't fricking screen, Temari!!
It's me - Ino!!
The crazy Barbie chick!
With your posters --
Naruto: *burns Sasuke's rejected script of a series called Sasuke*
And screenplays!
Both:
How we gonna pay…
How we gonna PAAAAY…
How WE gonna PAAAAY?
LAST YEAR'S REEEEENT!!
Ino: *on the mean streets of Konoha in a phone booth* *on the phone trying to get Temari to haul ass*
Don't fricking screen, Temari!!
It's me - Ino!!
The crazy Barbie chick!
Hey, hey, hey!! (Fat Albert?) Did you eat lunch?
… Don't change the subject, Temari!!
But… I don't want you to be anorexic!
STOP PUKING!
STOP IT!
… Well, the digital delay…
Didn't blow up (exactly)…
There may have been one teeny TINY spark…
… YOU'RE NOT CALLING NARUTO!!!
Jiraiya: *drunk off his feet and tripping over himself in an alleyway*
How do you stay on your feet
When there's nowhere left to peep
And it's 'trick or treat'
(And tonight it's 'trick')
'Welcome back to town'!
I should lie down… Dude…
Everything's brown…
And… OH CRAP! GAMABUNTA!!
I feel sick!! GET ME OUTTA HERE!
Naruto:
Where IS he?
Jiraiya: *lying on ground*
Getting dizzy…
Naruto & Sasuke:
How we gonna prevent…
How we gonna PREEEVENT…
How WE gonna PREEEVENT?
THE SPREAD OF AIDS?!
Neji: *talking on his awesome cell phone (that screens Main House calls)*
Tenten (alive)…? You sound sad…
I don't believe those two after everything I've done!!
Ever since our wedding I'm dirt… They'll see…
I can help them all out in the long run!!
Forces are gathering…
FORCES ARE GATHERING…
Kill the Main House!
FORCES ARE GATHERING!!
Jiraiya- *drunk* *falling over on Naruto*
… Don't change the subject, Temari!!
But… I don't want you to be anorexic!
STOP PUKING!
STOP IT!
… Well, the digital delay…
Didn't blow up (exactly)…
There may have been one teeny TINY spark…
… YOU'RE NOT CALLING NARUTO!!!
Jiraiya: *drunk off his feet and tripping over himself in an alleyway*
How do you stay on your feet
When there's nowhere left to peep
And it's 'trick or treat'
(And tonight it's 'trick')
'Welcome back to town'!
I should lie down… Dude…
Everything's brown…
And… OH CRAP! GAMABUNTA!!
I feel sick!! GET ME OUTTA HERE!
Naruto:
Where IS he?
Jiraiya: *lying on ground*
Getting dizzy…
Naruto & Sasuke:
How we gonna prevent…
How we gonna PREEEVENT…
How WE gonna PREEEVENT?
THE SPREAD OF AIDS?!
Neji: *talking on his awesome cell phone (that screens Main House calls)*
Tenten (alive)…? You sound sad…
I don't believe those two after everything I've done!!
Ever since our wedding I'm dirt… They'll see…
I can help them all out in the long run!!
Forces are gathering…
FORCES ARE GATHERING…
Kill the Main House!
FORCES ARE GATHERING!!
Jiraiya- *drunk* *falling over on Naruto*
Naruto- EEEEEEEEW!
Jiraiya:
Uuuuggghhh…
Ughhhhh…
Ughhhhh… I can't think!
Uuuughhhhh…
Uughhhhh…
Ughhhhh… I need a drink…
Naruto: GET OFF ME, PERV!! Ugh! *pushes Jiraiya off* Wait… How did you get here? Ah, well. Song's already ruined. *clears throat* *gets all philosophical*
"The music ignites the ramen with passionate fire…"
Ino: *still talking on phone*
Temari… I'm not a theatre person. Shut up.
Sasuke: *joining Naruto on philosophical rant*
"The narration crackles and pops with incendiary wit".
Ughhhhh…
Ughhhhh… I can't think!
Uuuughhhhh…
Uughhhhh…
Ughhhhh… I need a drink…
Naruto: GET OFF ME, PERV!! Ugh! *pushes Jiraiya off* Wait… How did you get here? Ah, well. Song's already ruined. *clears throat* *gets all philosophical*
"The music ignites the ramen with passionate fire…"
Ino: *still talking on phone*
Temari… I'm not a theatre person. Shut up.
Sasuke: *joining Naruto on philosophical rant*
"The narration crackles and pops with incendiary wit".
… What'd I just say?
Ino: *frustrated*
I could NEVER be a theatre person!!
Naruto: *pushes Jiraiya off him and onto the ground again*
Zoom in as they burn the past to the ground…
Ino: *frustrated*
I could NEVER be a theatre person!!
Naruto: *pushes Jiraiya off him and onto the ground again*
Zoom in as they burn the past to the ground…
This song's too confusing!! Make it stop!
Ino: *smacking phone against receiver*
He-LLOOOO?
Naruto & Sasuke:
AND FEEL THE HEAT OF THE CHAKRA'S GLOW…!
Ino: *slams phone to the ground* *jumps on it*
HELLO?! ANSWER ME, WENCH!!
Naruto: *talking to Temari on phone*
Hello? Temari?
… Your equipment won't work?
OKAY! IT'S UP TO ME! NARUTO TO THE RESCUE! *prepares to leave*
Naruto & half the cast:
How do you leave the past behind
When you live in Konoha and everyone dies?
It reaches way down deep and tears you inside out
Like Orochimaru on CRAAAACK!
Ino: *smacking phone against receiver*
He-LLOOOO?
Naruto & Sasuke:
AND FEEL THE HEAT OF THE CHAKRA'S GLOW…!
Ino: *slams phone to the ground* *jumps on it*
HELLO?! ANSWER ME, WENCH!!
Naruto: *talking to Temari on phone*
Hello? Temari?
… Your equipment won't work?
OKAY! IT'S UP TO ME! NARUTO TO THE RESCUE! *prepares to leave*
Naruto & half the cast:
How do you leave the past behind
When you live in Konoha and everyone dies?
It reaches way down deep and tears you inside out
Like Orochimaru on CRAAAACK!
AIDS!
Sasuke & other half of the cast:
How can you connect in a place
Where strange girls, landlords, lovers
Your own teammates betray?
All:
What binds the fabric together
When the raging, shifting winds of change
Keep ripping AWAAAAAAY!!
Neji:
Draw a line in the sand
And then take a stand!!
Sasuke:
Use your chakra to spar!
Naruto:
USE YOUR GUITAR!
All:
When they act tough, you call their bluff!
Naruto & Sasuke:
We're not gonna pay…
Naruto & Sasuke w/half the cast:
We're not gonna PAAAAY…
Naruto & Sasuke w/other half of the cast:
We're NOT gonna PAAAAY!
All:
LAST YEAR'S REEEENT!
THIS YEAR'S REEEENT!
NEXT YEAR'S REEEENT!
RENT RENT RENT REEE-EENT REEEEEENT!
WE'RE NOT GONNA PAY REEEEEEENT!!
Sasuke & Naruto:
'CAUSE EV-`RY… THING… IS…
When they act tough, you call their bluff!
Naruto & Sasuke:
We're not gonna pay…
Naruto & Sasuke w/half the cast:
We're not gonna PAAAAY…
Naruto & Sasuke w/other half of the cast:
We're NOT gonna PAAAAY!
All:
LAST YEAR'S REEEENT!
THIS YEAR'S REEEENT!
NEXT YEAR'S REEEENT!
RENT RENT RENT REEE-EENT REEEEEENT!
WE'RE NOT GONNA PAY REEEEEEENT!!
Sasuke & Naruto:
'CAUSE EV-`RY… THING… IS…
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENT!!
Naruto: *coughs and falls over*
-The Einde~!-
Next Chapter: Rent: Santa Fe