Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Wasted Years ❯ Ch. 2: You Don't See Me ( Chapter 2 )

Wasted Years

by Mizerable

Ch. 2: You Don't See Me

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Weeks passed and Sakura kept her promise. She said nothing and did nothing that could have hinted something occurred between herself and Sasuke. No one asked anything so she hoped no one was suspicious. Or if they were, at least they didn't let her know.

Practice wrapped up for the day and she was more than happy that it was over. They'd really been training hard lately. But the double-edged sword of leaving meant departing from Sasuke. She always worried what happened when no one was around, what the curse was doing to his body and spirit. "S-Sasuke-kun?" she approached, feeling unnaturally shy, "Do you want to go have dinner together?" He glanced over at her and quietly declined before looking away. Moments later Naruto was pawing at her hand, practically begging her to go have ramen with him. Sakura was about to give him the usual rejection, but paused. She had an idea.

"Actually, why don't the three of us go?"

The two boys both looked at her with varying levels of shock, meaning Naruto had enough surprise written across his face for the both of them. "What?! With the human ice cube??"

"We…We never eat together, all of us. I just thought…." Sakura trailed off. This was dumb of her. Of course they wouldn't like the idea. Sasuke hated being around anyone and Naruto hated being around Sasuke. "Oh, I'm being silly. Just forget-"

"I'll go," Sasuke stated nonchalantly.

"Eh?" Sakura was stunned. He'd actually agreed! Naruto, on the other hand, was so flustered that he had to call after the others to wait for him since they started off towards Ichiraku while he remained frozen in place.

Even after being seated at the counter, Sakura could tell the boys on either side of her were both rather tense during this outing. She was suddenly feeling very foolish for trying to make this work. Sasuke may have been showing up to train, but she knew he was always a million miles away from everyone. The hurt he felt day in and day out kept him from wanting to come anywhere near his reality. So it was time for her to work some magic. It would be nearly impossible to get Sasuke to open up but getting Naruto to talk about anything was a simple task. So she brought up what techniques they'd been working on lately and off he went on a nearly incomprehensible tangent.

Ah, that felt better.

She was still hard on Naruto a lot of the time, but it was more out of habit than anything else. She had grown fond of having the village's number one loudest ninja around. With his silly grin and wide, excitable blue eyes, Naruto really had become quite an adorable fellow. And strong! She'd never been the strength of the team so it wasn't a surprise that he'd become much more powerful than her when they were genin. But now that Sasuke was in the state he was in now, Naruto was easily the strongest of their team. But he probably didn't even realize it. Since Sasuke still saw Naruto as a rival, he felt like Sasuke was still his. He just couldn't believe that he'd surpassed the "Uchiha genius." But it was because he was so naïve about everything, he couldn't put his finger on why Sasuke "wasn't fun to spar with anymore." He couldn't, or wouldn't, see how deep into despair his rival had fallen.

So while Naruto rambled on about whatever popped into his mind, Sakura took note of how little Sasuke was eating of his dinner. The poor thing-- "Na, Sasuke, if you're not gonna eat that, can I have it?" Naruto suddenly inquired. Sasuke raised his eyes towards Naruto's direction before pushing the bowl towards the other boy. Naruto's eyes shifted from the bowl to Sasuke to the bowl again in utter shock, complete with a little nervous laugh. "I was kinda joking…" Naruto replied sheepishly.

"Do whatever you want," Sasuke answered coolly and stood up, evidently departing. As he dropped some money on the counter, Sakura caught his hand. "Please stay," she spoke softly, "Just for a little while longer?" Another bitter smirk cracked along his lips.

Like you'd let me do otherwise.

He hesitantly sat back down, his hand still in Sakura's against the countertop. He was tempted to just yank it away but the girl looked like she was about to launch into a hysterical crying fit. She'd been looking like that a lot these days and he didn't feel at all like hearing it right now.

And Naruto looked just plain puzzled. The longer he knew Sasuke, the weirder he got. He was such an unhappy guy, yet he never wanted anyone around. From his own experience, Naruto always felt better having people there to make the sadness and the loneliness go away. But nope, not Sasuke. He didn't need anyone. He didn't need to train. He didn't need to eat. He didn't need Sakura-chan's love.

Sakura-chan…

He'd never kept it a secret that he liked her. In fact, spending so much time around her over the last couple years only made him love her more. She was just such a wonderful girl who, even though she could be cold to him a lot, still let him stay in her life. Two years ago, she'd never say yes to dinner with him. But even if she brought Sasuke along, she had talked to him. To Naruto! And she didn't seem unhappy with that. Sure, she was still preoccupied with Sasuke and….well, she'd probably always be preoccupied with Sasuke.

Naruto wasn't as stupid as people thought him to be. He was hopelessly chasing Sakura just as she was hopelessly chasing Sasuke just as Sasuke was hopelessly chasing his ambitions. Well, Sasuke was the only one with a probable success rate. Maybe. Like he said, the guy just kept getting stranger. For example, the Sasuke who always claimed he didn't need anyone was sitting there holding Sakura's hand. In public! But Naruto could tell by the look on Sasuke's face that he barely even noticed he had hands. But that wasn't all that knew. He was always out of it when they trained; not at all sharp like he used to be.

Naruto never really noticed at first when Sasuke began to change. It was a gradual kind of thing that, after seeing someone everyday for the last couple years, you just wake up one day and ask: was this the same guy I knew back then?

Naruto didn't have an answer to that one.

He was distracted from his thoughts by a very loud, very feminine laugh. Only one person he knew sounded like that. And that would be one Yamanaka Ino.

"Well, if it isn't Forehead Girl!"

"Well, if it isn't Ino-pig!"

Naruto shuddered at this. Girls sure could be scary.

It looked like the girls were about to get into their usual squabble before Ino's eyes locked onto Sasuke's hand in Sakura's. And she was about to ask Sasuke about it but chose not to. She hadn't seen Sasuke in a while so she was surprised to see how…troubled he looked. He'd lost a lot of weight since the last time she'd seen him. "How have you been, Sasuke-kun?" Ino asked, sounding rather serious, "I haven't seen you around lately." He shrugged and that was all she could get out of him. God, this was the top rookie from her class? He'd always been the silent type, but now…

Naruto then realized Shikamaru was standing off to the side. He'd been so damn quiet, he didn't even notice he was there. Guess it wasn't too shocking that I guy like that "blended in with the shadows," so to speak. But Shikamaru didn't seem to notice anyone either. His eyes were focused on Ino, his jaw set tight so it seemed he was pissed about something.

And he was pissed. Shikamaru had been spending the last couple years so close to Ino and he really felt like she was close to him. Right up until Sasuke showed up. Then it was like he didn't exist in her world. For Ino, all she could see was Sasuke. With her so set on one guy, it was just plain pointless to try and go after her. No sense wasting his time there. He'd never get Ino to be interested in him.

Whether she noticed Shikamaru's frustration or not, Ino decided to suggest a little idea to Team Seven. "We're supposed to meet up with Chouji at the teahouse…why don't all of us go?"

"Don't you mean, 'why don't you come with me, Sasuke'?" Naruto couldn't help but be cynical. He was never close to any of these people and they were rarely, if ever, kind to him.

Ino wanted to go into her usual speech about how, of course, she only wanted Sasuke there. But a lot had changed since they attended the Academy together. The "cool" guy all the girls thought Sasuke to be was obviously suffering from something she couldn't even name. Sure, it was still fun to annoy Sakura about their goal to "catch Sasuke" but somewhere all the line that's all it became. A joke. Add that with an inability to swallow her pride and Ino's rivalry with Sakura could seem real to the outside observer. Only Ino knew that she'd stopped trying to win Sasuke's heart a long time ago.

After all, that day in the Forest of Death when Ino saw Sasuke covered in those strange markings, she knew she couldn't be with him. Whatever drove him to that state was something she was fairly certain she couldn't handle. But Sakura….She could reach him. She could save him. Even if they didn't see it, Ino knew Sasuke needed Sakura in his life more than anyone else. Sakura was the only voice he could hear.

Sakura, whom she helped find a voice.

And then there was Naruto, an obnoxious little punk that just made everything a little more interesting when he was around. Her parents always were wary of him and so she was, too. But over the years, she could only see him as another shinobi and a useful one at that. So Team Seven was good in her book.

"No, I mean all of you. If I just wanted Sasuke-kun, I would have only asked him," Ino replied in her usual haughty fashion, "Idiot." Naruto looked like he was going to explode after being insulted, but his goofy grin spread across his face instead. He was being included.

Sakura looked to Sasuke with a hopeful expression on her face. He'd really planned to get out of here so he could get some more training in. But with all these people staring at him, he felt uncharacteristically uncomfortable. So he vaguely gave an affirmative response and off they went to the teahouse.

Upon arriving and spotting Chouji, the group was surprised to find Team Eight there, as well. "Well looks like the gang's all here," Kiba announced, with an excited response from Akamaru. So everyone greeted each other and started catching up on things. "H-hi, Naruto-kun…" Hinata managed, her cheeks already flushed.

"Hmm? Oh, hey," he answered. She was so soft-spoken, he'd barely heard her above the others. Funny, everyone kept saying she wasn't as shy as she used to be but it sure seemed like she was whenever Naruto ran into her. Weird.

So now the three teams laid claim to a large table together all while having a pretty decent time. It was rare that any of them would ever seen anyone outside of their own group, since their training and missions kept them more than occupied. Since they were all being loud and generally tiring (especially Naruto and Kiba), Shikamaru decided to waste his time just making a note of how much people changed. Shino seemed about the same, still the quiet standoff-ish type. Kiba was still loud, though he apparently developed a habit of making subtle passes at Hinata. She, of course, would just blush a lot. They were a bit cuddly so maybe they were a thing? Not that he cared. Seeing Team Seven earlier let him see Naruto was slightly less high-strung, Sakura still doting over Sasuke, and Sasuke…There was something different about him. He always seemed like the real arrogant type, even if he was always pretty silent about it. Now the whole brooding act made him think the guy had some serious life issues to work out. What the hell did Ino see in such a depressing guy-

Ino, who'd been standing behind him goofing around, chose now to be a good time to throw her arms around his neck. She was apparently entertained by whatever conversation was going on at the table and just wanted to lean in to add her two cents. But Shikamaru didn't really notice. All he knew was how close she was, with her scent lingering around him and her breasts pressed against his back and her voice near his ear. This girl was positively evil! It was really a shame that he had less than a chance with her. It might have been nice. What a pain…

"Hey," Naruto leaned over to Sakura, "Does Ino like Shikamaru now or something?" It was strange to see a girl pay attention to anyone not-Sasuke. She felt a laugh wanting to escape. "I guess she knew she couldn't win against me." Naruto gave his standard foxy grin. It was always nice to hear Sakura act like her old confident self. That gloomy bastard Sasuke made her all gloomy, too. "And is Kiba flirting with Hinata as much as I think he is?" she asked in a hushed tone.

"Wha--? No way!" Naruto replied in a very Naruto-ish fashion. He may have noticed something obvious like Ino hanging all over Shikamaru, but anything other than that was beyond Naruto's grasp. All eyes were now on him and, thus, the return of the nervous laugh. Conversation resumed.

They were all so relaxed and happy and he wanted to be anywhere but here. No matter how much he should probably be enjoying the moment, none of the emotion could reach him. Maybe she sensed his distress, because Sakura's fingers wove around his under the table where no one could see. These small touches were going to his head and he really wanted to pull away. He still had his guilt from the incident a few weeks ago but she still craved his touch. He kind of wanted to laugh about things, really. When the curse had control of him while Sakura was there, he'd been anything but gentle with her. What he'd done to her had been rough, almost violent, and she still wanted to be near him. Maybe the girl wasn't as fragile as he thought since some part of her enjoyed it rough---He needed to stop this train of thought right now. He could feel his skin begin to burn and that only meant one thing: the curse seal.

A thousand times over Sasuke had reiterated his lack of interest in being in a relationship. He knew he was human and lust was normal enough but it could be easily ignored. It would only take away from his mission. But the damn curse pulled all these unfamiliar urges from deep within him; a dark place that he had no intention of exploring. Damn it, he wasn't even training or straining himself but the curse was activating. What the hell had he done to deserve this? He tightly squeezed her hand and heard her gasp softly in surprise. Her thumb moved in soothing circles over his skin and he tried to focus on that to see through the haze the pain and darkness left him in. He was losing control though…

She'd rested their joined hands in her lap, glancing over at him with her worry carefully masked as to not alert anyone else. The grip he held her hand in seemed rather painful for her but she was too foolish to say anything. Why was she always so damn stubborn?

He had to get out of here, no matter what she thought right now. No matter what any of them thought. It was strange, almost like sitting outside his own body watching himself move. He could see his hand move yet he couldn't stop it no matter how many times his brain screamed "no." His fingers brushed against her thigh but she kept looking forward. But he could tell by the look in her eyes she knew damn well what was going on. She knew he'd lost control. And still she just kept her damn mouth shut. And she loved him? For treating her like some goddamn whore? His hand slid easily against her inner thigh and she bit her bottom lip. She was nervous now. Her eyes darted around and realized everyone was so preoccupied that no one could see. In a way she was very grateful. She didn't want to explain this to the group. She didn't want to embarrass Sasuke by letting everyone know he was losing his mind.

Sakura got all tense, Naruto realized. He didn't remember anything being said that could have gotten her mad or upset. What could have happ-Sasuke's was feeling her leg. WTF?! He was about to go off on the jerk until he saw Sasuke's expression. He definitely was making that face he always made when he tried to hide that he was in pain. Was he okay? Sasuke and Naruto made eye contact and Naruto didn't miss the message being conveyed: Somebody kill me...

"What are those marks on your neck?" Shino suddenly asked. Sasuke slapped a hand over what was very obviously the curse seal spreading. "That's-" Ino couldn't forget the way those markings looked. Sasuke then hurried out of the booth without any sort of explanation. Sakura called after him before taking off to catch up with him. "N-Naruto-kun…wh-what's wrong with S-Sasuke-kun?" Hinata squeaked out. Naruto just shook his head, a stunned expression on his face.

With everything that had happened since he left, he'd completely forgotten about the teahouse incident. Considering what it led to, it amazed him that it had been lost in the myriad of chaos that it preceded. But a smack on the back of the head refused to let him pursue the memory further. "Quit daydreaming, Uchiha. Next time ya just might lose your head."

"Yes, ma'am," he replied curtly.

"Oh, don't go 'yes ma'am'-ing me. I don't wanna hear none of it," she snapped. She, being his captain. Or, that was at least one title he could attach to her. He absently mused he could probably call her Yanagi*, her name. Standing at nearly his own height, she possessed a slight, fragile-looking frame that probably wouldn't suffer from having a little more meat on its bones. Wisps of pale sea foam green hair fell loosely into her face from a hastily made ponytail drawn at her nape. Just as well, anyway. It almost made him think her to be the delicate type. As she released an agitated sigh to blow the strands from her vision, the scar running down her bottom lip to the mid of her chin came into view. Also got a nice view of her hardened indigo eyes. Ah, she looked pissed today. What a surprise…

" 'the hell you starin' at, boy?" she growled at him. He didn't answer and turned his sights forward. To this day, he was amazed he'd fallen into company with the likes of her. If asked to describe her, one might answer Yanagi was a hard drinking, hard-boiled, low-class bitch of a woman. And, in a way, much of it would be right. Right now, Sasuke knew the flask in her back pocket was always stocked full of strong whiskey. In the other pocket was a pack of strong cigarettes, her other favorite poison. Comfortably loaded to the brim with weapons; some concealed, some less so. And she had a hard mouth on her just to add to the effect. You'd almost feel bad for the guys on the wrong end of her interrogations. But as long as she wasn't interrogating you, it was somewhat awe-inspiring to watch her work.

"Uchiha, what the hell you thinkin' about?" Yanagi snapped him out of his thoughts again, "Thought I told you not to space out."

"Sorry…I was thinking about you-" Sasuke's mouth snapped shut. He'd said too much. Yanagi raised a fine eyebrow to this. "They good thoughts?" she inquired coolly. She'd bite off her own tongue before flat out saying she was interested in his response.

"Nice as they can be when it comes to you," Sasuke retorted and she cracked the tiniest hint of a smile, which softened into something more genuine.

"You sure know how to romance a girl," she teased, earning an eye roll from him, "C'mon kid, stay focused. We got a lotta work to get through today." She gave his arm an encouraging squeeze before setting her stride at a quicker pace. She was a hardened woman, having his age and two years to her life. Beneath her clothes rested more than just the one lip scar. She was battle-weary and tired of a lot of things. But she'd taken him under her wing when he'd had nothing even to his name, let alone anything to give her. And so she became all he had and all he could go home to, though she herself had no home to call her own.

She'd asked once if he'd ever take her to see Konoha, a village that had several strong ninja she was interested in observing. She's been so ecstatic to hear he'd trained under the famous "Copy-Ninja Kakashi." And to hear her really interested in anything made her voice sound a little sweeter, her eyes a little softer.

Of course, he flat-out refused her. He would never be returning to Konoha. Not after….

He really didn't want to train today. He could barely even bat away the hand that was trying to roll him onto his back. Obviously he wasn't up for any kind of movement so why couldn't they just let him sleep it off? After a little rest, he was positive he could have a productive training session.

"This is not good."

The person prodding at him was the owner of this statement. It was a feminine voice, but didn't belong to any of the squealing girls he'd attended the Academy with. It was a richer, harder voice. Most likely a woman older than the girls he knew. His eyes had no interest in confirming the identity, since he knew it would annoy him either way. At least it wasn't Sakura. After bawling and pounding on his door for nearly two hours, she must have finally gotten the message that he wasn't going to let her in. He'd slumped to the floor inside his home and hadn't budged an inch since then. Even if he wanted to throw open the door just to tell her to shut up, it was beyond his physical capabilities at the time.

"I figured as much. Thank you for coming on such short notice," a slightly muffled, lazy drawl gave a reply. So Kakashi-sensei was here, too…

"It made my seal react so I knew something serious must have happened."

Her seal? …Anko?

Now lying on his back, the two jounin had a better view of the boy in question. The seal had faded but its damage was done. Through squinted, bleary eyes, Sasuke was attempting to look at them but his vision couldn't stay in focus for more than thirty seconds. A trail of crimson had at some point leaked down his chin during the night, accompanying the generous puddle of blood that had long since dried on the tatami.

"He needs medical treatment. We should hurry to the hospital," Anko spoke up.

The hospital again?He was fine…he just needed some rest and training could resume. He had to train. Didn't they understand? Didn't they know he had to prepare to face Itachi?

"Aa," Kakashi gave his vague consent to the plan, followed by a heavy sigh before gathering Sasuke into his arms.

"You shouldn't blame yourself for any of this. What Orochimaru did to him…only Sasuke-kun can fight this battle. Nothing you could have done would have changed things. It's not up to anyone but him," Anko stated bluntly.

"No, I couldn't have fixed this…It's last night that I had the power to prevent," Kakashi answered gravely and Anko blanched at that.

Last night? Sure, he'd had another episode with the curse seal…Sakura. Everything must have come out about what he'd done to her those few weeks ago, since all those witnesses probably caught onto what was going on at the teahouse. So she caved and spilled about the incident…

Good girl, maybe now she'll stay away. Whatever would become of them, being near each other was sure to only bring out the most hideous in both himself and Sakura. Perhaps now she could understand that she never loved him and never would.

So into his realm of solitude and inky black security he retreated.

To be continued…





*Yanagi - This is the Japanese name for "Willow." For anyone who was unaware, Sakura means "Cherry Blossom"