Naruto Shippuden Fan Fiction / Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The Preferable Path to Perfection is You ❯ Google Oogle ( Chapter 4 )

Disclaimer: The characters, items, places etc of Naruto are property of Masashi Kishimoto. These objects are used without permission for entertainment only, not for making money. No infringement is intended.

Chapter 4: Google Oogle

Itachi learnt over the coming months that there was no such thing as a typical morning with Deidara around. The artist had practically moved into Itachi's home, going back to his own to sleep maybe half the nights in a week and always returning at around five am if he did. Itachi had started to wake naturally at that time, which worried him somewhat since he'd never been a morning person.

Deidara was fanatical about his art, he had also learnt. Well- he had known that already, but he had got to experience it firsthand. His own belongings weren't exempt from the pull of his friend's artistic flare, though fortunately anything Deidara had done to his things was generally reversible and therefore he deemed it harmless.

One particular Saturday morning he awoke and pulled himself sleepily out of the bed, glancing at the time. Five am- of course. He was tempted to lie back down and try and sleep more but he knew Deidara would come and wake him if he did- sometimes he even made coffee for him, which was a novelty.

He stepped past his desk on his way out of the door, stopping and backing up slightly. Something hadn't looked right. He frowned at the desk in question, wondering what was different- something was, but his tired mind couldn't yet process what it was. He blinked, eyes falling on his mouse as he realised that it was the source of discrepancy.

It was sporting a pair of googly eyes. He blinked a few more times, wondering if he was dreaming- no, _wishing_ he was dreaming because there was no reality in which his mouse with happy googly eyes was a good thing.

He picked it up to inspect it, noticing another more pressing issue with said mouse as he lifted it slowly into the air. The wire had been cut to a much shorter length, trailing uselessly beneath it as Itachi attempted to comprehend what had happened to it.

"Deidara," he muttered under his breath, putting the mouse down with a sharp bang, causing the googly eyes to jiggle as he did so. He stalked towards the door, grabbing his dressing gown from the back of it and slipping it on as he made his way to the living room.

Deidara was sitting at the table doing something with a pair of wire cutters, giving him a smile as he entered. "Good morn-"

"What did you do to my mouse?" Itachi growled at him, cutting him off. He leant against the door frame, putting a hand to his forehead to quell the sudden rising stress headache.

"I gave him character, yeah," Deidara explained, looking confused. He indicated the cutters in his hands and what he had been snipping- it was some kind of wire and Itachi dreaded to think where it had come from. "I'm making whiskers for him now- he needs whiskers."

"It needs to get thrown away," Itachi responded, trying to keep his temper in check. The blond idiot didn't even think he'd done anything wrong for heaven's sake!

"Thrown away?! Are you insane, yeah?!"

Oh great, and now he'd sent the lunatic off on a rant about the values of art- who was he to be calling anyone else insane, anyway? Itachi padded past him to make a coffee, Deidara seemingly completely oblivious as he stepped into the kitchen.

"You can't just throw away art! Let me finish it!"

Apparently he wasn't oblivious since he'd followed Itachi into the kitchen, continuing on his tirade. Itachi held a hand up to stop him, needing to ask the question that had been preying on his mind.

"Where did you get the wire for the..." Itachi didn't want to say it in case it encouraged him, but he was getting a blank look so he did. "Whiskers?"

"Your electric guitar."

"I don't own an electric guitar."

"Yes you do," Deidara remarked. "It was in the living room."

"That's my brother's guitar," Itachi pointed out evenly. "Are you going to explain to him why it's missing a string or shall I?"

Deidara faltered in his answer for just a moment before brightening up and shrugging.

"No big deal then."

"You might not get on with my brother but I do," Itachi commented, seating himself at the table with his coffee and exhaling irritably. "And I'd rather like to continue doing so."

Deidara and Sasuke were like oil and water- in fact, the only words they had exchanged that weren't laden with outright bitchiness were 'thank you making nice cake' and a 'hrmph' in response that had Deidara wound up immediately.

Itachi had attempted to explain Sasuke was one of those people who didn't just accept anybody and that he was possessive about Itachi, but it had seemingly fallen on deaf ears. Now he just ignored them and let them get on with it, figuring they'd probably work it out eventually.

"It's for art, yeah."

"I doubt Sasuke will appreciate his belongings being desecrated in the name of 'art'."

"Why did he leave it here then?"

"I have no idea- he probably forgot it. Regardless, I'm sure he assumed it wasn't going to come to much harm."

Deidara rejoined him at the table, picking his wire cutters and snipping at the guitar wire with a little less enthusiasm.

"I needed to get work done today," Itachi voiced after a moment. "Instead I now need to go and buy a new mouse. You know you're coming with me, right?"

"I'm busy, yeah."

"No, you need to replace the guitar string before Sasuke finds out and kills you. I doubt he's going to be very understanding." He paused to sip his coffee before continuing. "That said, let it be known even I'm not impressed with this, Deidara."

"But-"

"No," Itachi interrupted, holding a hand up. "No excuses. We can go to that shopping centre just outside of town in time for when everything opens, replace everything and pretend this never happened."

"Can we get lunch while we're there? We can make a morning of it."

"If we must," Itachi sighed, folding his arms on the table and laying his head on them. It was clear he wasn't going to get much work done today anyway, so why not?

'Why not', indeed? Itachi could think of a fair few reasons why he should have simply stayed in bed that day, let alone been stupid enough to tell Deidara to come with him.

It should have been easy. It should have been a quick drive to the nearby shopping centre, a trip into the computer store to buy a mouse, another store for guitar strings, a little window shopping, a quick lunch then home again in time for him to get some work done after all. In theory it was simple and should have been completed in a couple of hours at the most.

Deidara was incapable of making anything that needed to be done simple. Oh no, he had to find some way of complicating matters and somehow he'd managed it before Itachi had even got them to the shopping centre.

At this rate, Deidara was going to be lucky if he got to their destination in one piece and it wasn't because Itachi was going to maim him if he didn't get back in the car.

He was attempting to climb a traffic light pole and failing- he had jumped out when they were sitting at the lights and attempted to clamber up the pole, leaving Itachi staring dumbly at him while getting beeped by the cars behind for staying stationary at a green light.

He had steered the car off to the edge of the road, getting out and leaning back against the side of it. Did he really want to ask what the idiot was doing?

Yes, he decided. Yes he did because if it was ridiculous enough perhaps he'd be able to convince him to get back in the car.

"What are you doing?" He called when Deidara slipped off the pole for the tenth time.

"Art, yeah," Deidara called, attempting to climb up once more.

"That doesn't answer my question."

Deidara stopped, one arm and his legs wrapped round the pole as he rifled in his pocket and pulled something out. Itachi recognised it as a set of googly eyes similar to the ones his mouse had been parading that morning, yet larger.

"Are you seriously-"

He cut himself off as Deidara started to scale the pole again- he knew the answer to that. Yes he seriously was going to stick a pair of googly eyes to the traffic lights.

"Why?" He muttered to himself, leaning his head back against the side of the car. It was an open question, really- why was he doing it, why was Itachi not forcing him back into the car, why was Itachi not driving off and leaving him there in fact?

Deidara yelled in delight as he smacked on eye on the traffic light, falling as he did so. He landed on one knee with a jarring thud, causing Itachi to wince- apparently, the blond didn't even notice, once again trying to climb the pole to add the second one.

After several more failed attempts and numerous cars slowing to see what was going on- and driving off laughing- Itachi finally walked over and grabbed his arm, shaking his head firmly. "No. Can't it just be a one eyed traffic light?"

Deidara pulled his arm free, looking scandalised. "Have you ever heard of a Cyclops traffic light?"

"Traffic lights do not have eyes in the first place," Itachi insisted, resigning himself to his fate when he noticed the blank look he was receiving. "I'm getting back in the car. If you're not done in the next five minutes you can walk the rest of the way."

He tried the door handle, reaching into his pocket for his keys as he found it locked. Frowning, he realised with a start that his keys weren't there and they were, in fact, locked inside the car. He could see them sitting in the ignition- of course luck would have it the window was wound down only slightly, making him unable to reach them through it.

It was Deidara's fault, he lamented to himself as he pulled his phone from his pocket. It was always Deidara's fault. He had locked himself out of his car before thanks to Deidara's idiot schemes- they'd been stuck at the movie theatre at eleven at night waiting for a locksmith after Deidara had somehow managed to throw Itachi's keys down the drain.

He speed dialled a familiar number, laughing slightly at the memory- he hadn't laughed at the time, mind. The very next day he had devised a backup plan.

"Sasuke?" He spoke, exhaling and staring at the sky. "Can you bring my spare car key?"

He was thankful Sasuke lived reasonably close by, approaching Itachi with one eyebrow raised in Deidara's direction only a short while later. Itachi had told him where they were headed and why but had wisely left off the part about the origin of the mouse's whiskers.

"Do I want to know what he's doing?" Sasuke asked, still looking at Deidara halfway up the pole.

"I don't care anymore," Itachi sighed, holding his hand out to receive the key. "Thanks, Sasuke."

Sasuke handed it over and glanced up at the traffic light- it was still wearing one rather sad looking googly eye, looking as sorry for itself as an inanimate object could.

"Why are you friends with this idiot again?" He remarked curtly, indicating the frantically clambering artist over his shoulder with his thumb.

"Don't start, Sasuke," Itachi sighed heavily, testing the key in the lock. It unlocked the car and he breathed a sigh of relief, neglecting to get inside for a moment as he noticed Sasuke walking towards Deidara.

"Are you trying to stick another one on?" His brother called to Deidara, who was panting at the bottom of the pole having failed his latest attempt to climb it once more. He didn't get a response so Sasuke held his hand out for the eye in question.

"Sasuke," Itachi rose his voice warningly, not wishing to stunt the only reasonably kind thing he'd seen his brother offer his friend, but also not wanting him to do what he knew he was about to.

Sasuke was already up and climbing the pole once he had the eye in his hand, reaching the top easily to stick it on next to the first. Itachi stared at him with wide eyes, wondering if he really had woken up in a different universe as his brother jumped down and landed neatly on the floor.

"You can thank me later," he spoke smoothly as he walked past Itachi. "Now you can leave, right?"

Itachi watched him walk away without another word, finally turning his attention to Deidara. He was frowning up at the light, seemingly annoyed with something.

"I wouldn't have put it there, yeah," he muttered, opening his bag and pulling out a camera. Itachi had given it to him as a gift- he'd very quickly grown tired of Deidara forever wanting to sketch things while they were on the move, so he'd given him the camera as a compromise.

He'd argued Deidara could take a snap of any moment he liked and sketch it later- Deidara had argued it wasn't the same. Itachi had won the dispute simply by pointing out he was the one with a driver's license and if Deidara was unwilling to compromise, he would find himself stranded in various places very quickly.

Itachi slipped thankfully back into the car, holding down the horn to get Deidara's attention- it worked, leaving Deidara to take a couple of photos and jump back into the front seat.

"It's been an hour and the drive is supposed to be fifteen minutes," Itachi pointed out, his tone less than amused as he started the car. "I've put the child lock on."

"Are you indicating I'm a child?" Deidara asked, folding his arms and clearly sulking.

"No," Itachi replied with the patience of a saint, pulling the car back out onto the main road. "I'm implying I want you to stay in the car so we can actually get to our destination today."

"Itachi?" Deidara spoke after a moment, his voice a low whine. "I think my knee's bleeding."

Itachi glanced at him out of the corner of his eye with an exasperated sigh. "You're not going to bleed to death in the five minutes it takes to get there."

"But it hurts!"

He really should have left the idiot at home.

Itachi parked the car as close as he could when they finally arrived at the shopping centre- which apparently wasn't close enough, going by the whinging Deidara was doing about having to walk.

"You're the one who decided to swing off of traffic light poles," Itachi told him firmly as they got out of the car. "Now you're the one who needs to deal with the consequences."

Deidara perched himself on a nearby wall, checking out the damage done to his knee. It was bleeding as he suspected and he touched the skin around it gingerly, looking up at Itachi with eyes that clearly begged for sympathy.

"Alright," Itachi remarked after glancing at the wound and seeing it actually was in need of care. "Let's get you cleaned up."

Deidara looked up at him with wide blue eyes, attempting to look innocent as he stayed seated, covering the wound with a wince as the fabric brushed the graze.

"I'm not supporting you, you can walk," Itachi told him firmly, shaking his head. "You're bleeding, not an invalid. Come on, let's find the bathroom."

Spending time with Deidara really was like parenting a child sometimes he realised, as Deidara walked behind him limping like he'd had a leg removed.

He found the bathroom close by, leading Deidara inside and instructing him to lean back against the sink. Dampening some tissue, he pushed it against the cut rather roughly. Deidara yelped and pushed him off, glaring as he did so.

"You don't have to do this, yeah."

"Don't worry about it," Itachi replied quietly, pushing back on the cut and holding Deidara's leg in place as he tried to squirm away. "It's easier if I do it."

Deidara seemed subdued for a moment, hissing and yelping slightly as Itachi cleaned up the blood. "How did I find you?" He asked when Itachi let up for a moment.

"What do you mean?" Itachi replied, not glancing up. It was obvious he wasn't referring to how they had actually met after all- he frowned slightly, feeling uneasy.

"You've done more for me in the last few months than anyone ever has."

Itachi finally looked up, eyes widened just slightly before he recovered and returned to the task at hand. "It doesn't take much to be polite and respect people," he remarked with a shrug.

"It's more than that, yeah."

Itachi froze at those words. "Is it?" He asked, his voice completely level even though inside he was in turmoil. Had Deidara worked him out? He glanced around, feeling trapped.

There was nowhere to run- something he begrudgingly agreed he did a lot when the conversation turned to him- but the discussion couldn't continue. Itachi had every intention of telling his friend how he felt but not until he was ready, and definitely not under anyone's terms but his own.

Besides, dropping the occasional hint was easier, even if it was the coward's way out. He grimaced mentally- it had taken a lot to admit he was simply unable to just open his mouth and say it.

It was an imperfection, even. He pushed the thought away, glancing up at Deidara. He had yet to elaborate, simply wincing in pain as Itachi pressed down unintentionally harder, distracted by his thoughts.

"Gentle, yeah?" Deidara bit out, leaving Itachi to let up slightly with a touch of guilt.

"This is actually pretty deep," he spoke up after a moment, a hint of concern in his voice. "Can't you restrain yourself a little sometimes?"

"You don't understand art," Deidara sulked. "Art is freedom- why would I want to restrain myself from it?"

"I may not understand art but I understand a needless wound inflicted through idiocy," Itachi replied, pulling himself to a stand. "It's not bleeding anymore but it'll be sore. I'm sure you'll live, though."

"Did you just call me an idiot?"

Itachi gave him a small, mildly affectionate smile. "In one context- possibly. Come on, let's go."

Deidara wasn't listening, it seemed. His gaze had fallen on something and Itachi had to follow his line of sight to find what. His dark eyes widened as he realised, working out what was about to happen moments before it did.

Deidara grinned and turned, putting a hand into his pocket and pulling out another set of googly eyes. He leapt forward, injury apparently forgotten, and stuck them to the mirror over the sink they were next to as he took out his camera.

"You'll get us arrested if you start taking photos in here!" Itachi hissed at him, pulling on Deidara's arm as he snapped the shot of the mirror.

"This is beautiful though, yeah," Deidara protested, taking another snap. "The reflection-"

"No, people will mistake you for a sex pest," Itachi tried to explain, attempting to take the camera from him.

"You're overreacting!" Deidara protested, pushing him off. "Why would they do that?"

"This is a public bathroom you idiot," Itachi reminded him sharply. "Why do you think people might be uncomfortable with someone taking photographs in here?"

He received a blank look as Deidara snapped another photo defiantly.

"Use your head!" Itachi sighed, succeeding in taking the camera away.

"There's no-one in here but us anyway!"

"That doesn't make it alright- someone could walk in!"

Itachi took him by the arm and herded him out smartly, unprepared to feud about it any longer when he knew he was right. He practically threw the camera back at Deidara once they were stepping far, far away in the other direction.

"Can we go and buy a mouse now please?" He asked despairingly. "I think you've caused enough havoc today."

Itachi managed to get into the store and buy a mouse without any trouble- namely, without Deidara attempting to personify any more inanimate objects. He even managed to pick out a packet of guitar strings without any hassle, simply following Itachi's instruction on which to get. He had acted like an adult, which was a rarity.

In fact, Itachi was so impressed with his good behaviour that he had bought him lunch.

"Itachi?"

Itachi glanced across at Deidara, who was twirling a small clump of hair nervously between two fingers- it was a habit of his when he got anxious, Itachi had noticed. They were sitting outside of a small cafe watching the world go past with a coffee and a sandwich- nothing fancy, but a nice enough moment spent together.

All it needed now was for Deidara to stop being so quiet all of a sudden. Itachi had been happy at first that he appeared to have taken his advice and toned down his actions, but now he was just worryingly silent.

"What is it?" He asked when Deidara didn't continue to speak.

"Do..."

Deidara swallowed, twirling the hair faster and looking away. Itachi narrowed his eyes in concern, putting his coffee cup down.

"Out with it," he said, his voice kind.

"Do I annoy you?"

Deidara had spoken so quickly Itachi almost missed what was said, and he took a moment to process it before shaking his head.

"No," he replied. "You're a little infuriating sometimes, but you don't annoy me."

"Not even with the art stuff?"

"Of course not," Itachi reassured him. "Your art means a lot to you. I don't really mind what you do if it keeps you happy and doesn't hurt anyone." He paused before deciding to add what he really wanted to say. "I realised how much your art means to you the day I met you and you kissed me for it."

Deidara gave a strangled cry at that, twirling the hair so much Itachi was surprised the strands didn't snap. "Ah, that, yeah..."

He finally let go of his hair, letting it drop over his eye and tapping a hand anxiously on the table. A slight blush had spread across his cheeks and just as Itachi was about to pick up on it, he noticed Deidara's eyes glaze slightly. He was looking at something again- Itachi sighed, picking up his coffee cup. Some poor object was about to get attacked with a set of googly eyes, he was sure.

His coffee cup was wrenched from his hand and he hissed as some of the liquid splashed him. Deidara didn't seem to notice, sticking a set of angry googly eyes to the side of the cup and turning it to face Itachi.

"It's angry, yeah," he pointed out quite needlessly. Itachi glared back, feeling quite angry himself. "Because you're drinking its life. A cup's only purpose is to hold liquid, yet when you drink the liquid you make the cup useless. So, the cup needs to always be full to be happy-"

"Deidara," Itachi interrupted, holding one hand out. "Give me back my coffee."

"But then you'll drink it."

"That's exactly what I bought it for."

"It'll be unhappy!"

"I'll be unhappy if you don't give it back."

Deidara pushed it back across the table, frowning at Itachi. "You just don't get it do you, yeah?" He complained.

Itachi pulled the eyes off and stuck them to the table instead, taking a sip and averting his gaze. Deidara wasn't one to talk about not getting it, he decided. Stupid dense idiot.

He felt a little guilty for his thoughts and that guilt somehow manifested itself into a visit to the shopping centre art store and an instruction to Deidara to 'pick something, but please be sensible'. Out loud Itachi called it a gift- inwardly he called it an affectionate gesture. Sure, there may not have been much difference when you broke the two down but it made him feel less like a love-struck teenager either way.

Which he was not- he wasn't even a teenager anymore for a start.

He was not watching Deidara tear around the store with a beaming smile on his face as he attempted to choose what he wanted.

He was not smiling, no he was not!

Okay, so maybe he was- but only a little bit.

"Did you find anything?" He asked when he'd been standing impatiently by the door for about twenty minutes in an attempted hint to the younger man to hurry up and make a decision.

"I can't decide, yeah," Deidara told him, holding a sketchbook in one hand and a set of paintbrushes in the other.

Itachi swiftly took both off of him and headed for the till- he was perfectly happy to just get Deidara both if it meant they could leave. It was close to four pm now and he really did want to get even just a little work done that night.

"Are you sure?" Deidara asked shyly, hovering by his side at the till. His eyes landed on something sitting on display at the till as he spoke and his eyes widened, not waiting for Itachi to answer as he leant past him and picked the display item up.

"No," Itachi said firmly.

"I'll buy them," Deidara protested, adding the item to his purchases.

It was a packet of googly eyes in different sizes and expressions, advertised as being on sale. Deidara grabbed another pack, unable to resist such a deal.

Itachi sighed in frustration- yet he paid for all the items anyway, shoving the bag in Deidara's hands and beckoning for him to follow. "We're going," he called over his shoulder as the blond caught up. "It's getting late."

Deidara kept quiet as they walked back to the car, clearly contemplating something as they walked. He grinned as Itachi got inside the car and ran around to the front of it, attaching a set of eyes to the front bumper.

Itachi beeped the horn and flashed the lights at him, causing him to jump. He quickly snapped a shot and clambered into the car, smiling to himself as he did so.

"Your car is happy now, yeah," he admonished with an accomplished nod.

"My car was perfectly happy without the addition of stick on eyes," Itachi replied, pulling the car out of the parking space.

Once they were home- in good time, with both parties present and without stopping to stick ridiculous eyes to anything- Itachi stepped around to the front of the car. The eyes really did look happy and he smiled at the sight. Without even trying Deidara could be pretty adorable sometimes.

He stepped past the car and into the door, leaving the eyes attached. They weren't going to do any harm staying there, he decided, so why not just leave them?

The following morning Itachi stopped by his desk once more before leaving the room, wishing to double check that normality had been restored. His new mouse was sitting on the desk which was a good start, only it was once again sporting a pair of googly eyes. He laughed to himself at seeing them, smiling as he reached out to pick it up.

The smile quickly turned to a frown- googly eyes were one thing but what was this new addition?

Deidara- of course it was him, there was no other suitable candidate- had soldered a pink pipe cleaner to the end of his mouse. He had deliberately picked a wireless one so Deidara couldn't give its 'tail' an impromptu trim, but it seemed the lack of said tail hadn't gone down very smoothly. Scowling, he tested the buttons- they still appeared to work so he dropped it gently back on the desk with a sharp sigh. Was it really worth fighting about this?

No, he decided, grabbing his dressing gown and heading from the room. There was no stopping Deidara when he was in an artistic mood. And really- did he want to rein in that side of his character? Itachi smiled, closing his eyes for a moment as he thought about it and settled on a firm no. While Itachi couldn't bring himself to be flawed, Deidara's imperfections were what made him perfect.

Chapter End