Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ Angels of Armageddon ❯ Side Story 1: "Asuka's Story" ( Chapter 4 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: otakusadist 
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Action / Drama / Romance | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 08.29.2001 | Pages: 7 | Words: 3.4K | Visits: 454 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Action / Drama / Romance | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 08.29.2001 | Pages: 7 | Words: 3.4K | Visits: 454 | Status: Completed
DISCLAIMER: The characters, universe, etc. of Neon Genesis Evangelion
are not mine. I make no claim to them. They are used without
permission.
Foreword: This is a side story. It's not critically important to the
actual fic, but it should help explain a few things you're probably
wondering about (when did Asuka become nicer, and what happened to the
giant Rei head, for example).
-------------------------------------------------------- --------------
Angels of Armageddon
Author: Ryan Xavier
Side Story 1: Asuka's Story
Asuka shivered as the biomechanoid came to life. Luckily for her, she
was already asleep, and so wasn't bothered.
Not consciously, anyway.
Probably as a result of too much booze, along with the awakening MP
Eva, Asuka's sleepy mind was shocked back into a memory buried in her
subconscious. She began to dream.
* * *
"Hey, I know you!" the strange blue-haired girl was shouting. "You're
the pervert who was looking at my panties!"
Asuka jumped to her feet. "And what do you mean by that? Why're you
picking on him?"
"What's up with you? Are you two doing it?" the other girl asked.
Asuka stammered incoherently, succeeding only in getting very mad.
"Hey, calm down!" Hikari was shouting, trying to stop this before it
got violent. "This isn't a bar!"
"Oh, let it go on," Misato said, lounging in her chair. "This is more
interesting than the lesson, anyway."
The class laughed. Asuka and Shinji both blushed. After a moment,
the girl...what was her name?...Rei something...whoever-she-was
figured out it had gone on a little too far. She took a breath,
forcing herself to calm down.
"Just don't do it again," Rei said. She tried to sound polite, though
that was difficult to do, saying it through clenched teeth.
Asuka sat down, still fuming, but not wanting to say anything, since
that would just draw more attention of the wrong kind. She was
probably going to end up carrying buckets for this...
* * *
The rest of the day somehow passed without much incident. The new
girl quickly became popular among the other girls, proving to be
outgoing and quite friendly once you got to know her. This, of
course, pulled attention off of Asuka, something the German girl hated
to see happen.
But oddly enough, even though Asuka hated to lose attention like this,
she was at the same time excited to be seeing this happen. Before
today, she hadn't had any competition for being the most popular girl
in school. Now she did. And there was nothing like a little
competition to get Asuka's blood going.
While she was walking back home with Shinji, she was plotting what
she'd do tomorrow to try taking back some of the limelight. The boy
saw the malicious grin spreading across Asuka's face, and was vaguely
frightened. He didn't know what it meant.
"Er...sorry about this morning..." he said, hesitantly.
Asuka's blue eyes flickered over to Shinji, who flinched as the girl's
full attention switched over to him. ^Okay, I might have lost the
popularity contest for today,^ Asuka thought, ^but I can still get
some fun out of Shinji, here.^
"Well, you should be!" Asuka shot back at him, prodding him with words
to try and get a rise out of him. "Eyeing a defenseless young girl
like that! I swear, all boys are perverts."
"B-but it was just an accident!"
"Hah! Well, I better not be seeing you doing that to _me_," she said
haughtily.
"O-okay, Asuka. I'll never do that. I don't even want to."
"And what do you mean by _that?!_" Asuka shouted back, shifting gears
entirely. "You mean I'm not even worth it?"
Shinji, now thoroughly confused, could only look at the ground and
mumble apologetically.
Asuka smiled to herself. ^One day,^ she thought. ^One day, he
_might_ actually respond. That might be fun...^
Her mood was much better now. It stayed that way as she left Shinji
at the Ikari apartment. She was still quite contented with herself
when she made it to her house.
"I'm home!" Asuka called out as she stepped through the door.
"Oh, hello Asuka," a voice called out from the kitchen. "How was your
day?"
"It was okay, mom," she said, stepping out of her shoes. She walked
past the kitchen, where Zepplin Soryu could be seen making something
for dinner. Asuka's mouth started to water at the smell.
Smiling still, Asuka walked across the living room, dropping her
school bag on the couch. She stepped down the hallway, taking the
ribbon off of her school uniform and already deciding what clothes she
should change into for the afternoon. She threw open the door to her
room...
...and saw a human body hanging from the ceiling.
Asuka blinked, not believing it at first. She gasped sharply,
stepping back.
"M...mom...?" she called out, weakly.
The body rotated slowly, the rope around its neck slowly twisting.
Asuka, sickened and frozen to the floor, could only watch as the dead
face of her mother looked back at her.
Asuka screamed. She stepped backwards again, only to be stopped as
she hit a wall. She screamed again, covering her eyes with her hands
so she didn't have to look.
Then, all of a sudden...something changed. She felt the very _air_
shift around her. Shuddering and trying hard not to throw up, she
opened her eyes, carefully looking up.
It looked like she was underwater. But she was still breathing...when
had this happened?
"So your mind rejected it," came a calm voice from off to her side.
Asuka turned her head, looking in the direction of the voice. There,
standing quietly with her arms crossed behind her back, was that blue-
haired girl. But although she looked the same, she didn't..._feel_
the same. This girl gave off an aura of coldness and uncaring, and
those eyes stared at Asuka with inhuman intensity.
Asuka got to her feet. "What did you _do_ to me, Wondergirl?" she
asked, trying to work up some anger. She didn't know where that
nickname had come from, but she didn't care. If she could just get
angry, maybe she could flush that image of her mother hanging from her
mind...
"I did nothing," Rei replied, quietly. Only her lips moved; she
didn't even appear to be shifting her balance like a normal human
would. "Your mind created your version of utopia, and then rejected
it."
"What?" Asuka asked. Rei just stared back at her.
Then, with a suddenness that made the girl lose her balance, Asuka's
memories returned. She held her head, crying out in pain as she fell
to her knees.
"No!" she cried out. "Mama! Mama, don't leave me! Don't..."
She got a hold of herself, gasping for breath again. She again became
aware that the environment had changed. She opened her eyes, seeing
that she was now waist-deep in water. She was also wearing a bright
red, skintight bodysuit. What was it called? A plugsuit...
"You chose to reject false pleasure," Rei said. The girl was still in
a standing position, somehow standing on the surface of the water, as
though not bothering herself with trivial things like the laws of
physics.
"No..." Asuka said, glaring back at Rei. "_You_ did something! It's
_your_ fault, you damn _doll!_"
She lunged at Rei, though the deep water made that rather difficult.
She still made it to the girl and threw a punch...
...only to watch as her fist passed right through Rei, as though the
girl were made of nothing but mist.
"I may have caused Third Impact," Rei responded, apparently not even
paying attention to what Asuka was doing. "...but it was unavoidable
by that point. Someone had to control the outcome, and I chose that
it would be Ikari-kun."
"What the..." Asuka muttered, looking at her fist. Fist + flesh =
punch, right? It shouldn't just go right _through_ the target...and
what had Rei just said? She caused _Third_Impact?!_
"Your body has been reduced to its primordial components," Rei said.
"And your mind was incorporated into the rest of humanity's. But like
Ikari-kun, you've rejected it."
Asuka blinked, trying to understand what Rei was saying.
"You now have a choice," Rei said. "This is a critical time...I doubt
the rest of humanity will have this kind of opportunity. You can
choose to return to your perfect world, or you can go back to the
world as it is."
"As it is..." Asuka thought. She remembered the world as it had been,
all right. What had she been doing? She'd just found her mama...and
then...
Asuka's eyes focused on something invisible in the distance. The next
moment, she cried out, falling to her knees as she felt her left eye
explode into pain. It felt like she'd just been stabbed! But, there
hadn't been anything to stab her...
"You remember," Rei commented, watching blood flow around Asuka's
fingers. Asuka barely heard her; her mind was scrambled from the
pain. Asuka's right arm stiffened, then reached out into the air.
Asuka shakily turned her head, watching with her good eye.
Asuka screamed in absolute agony as her right arm was split in half
the long way. She clutched at the ruined limb, as blood poured out of
her and stained the water she was standing in.
Finally, Asuka choked, spitting up blood as she felt her torso
punctured in over a dozen places, as though long knives had just been
rammed completely through her body. She collapsed into a twitching
heap of pain and suffering.
"Your mind was one with the Eva when it was killed," Rei said, walking
up to Asuka. "You are remembering its pain, not your own."
The girl took Asuka by her legs and shoulders, lifting her up out of
the bloody water and placing her on an invisible ledge.
"Mama..." Asuka whimpered out. "Mama, help me..."
"I will try," Rei replied. Asuka looked up as she felt the pain in
her body lessen. She opened her eyes as she felt some pressure being
applied to her head.
Rei had just placed a wadded bandage over Asuka's left eye. Asuka
looked down, to see her arm had been bandaged, too. Judging from the
lack of pain, there was probably a similar treatment to her torso,
only hidden underneath the plugsuit. How Rei gotten there without
Asuka noticing was beyond the German girl's knowledge, but she didn't
care.
"...thanks," Asuka said, grudgingly. She looked away from the red-eyed girl.
"As the new Lillith, mother of all things, it was my responsibility.
Now Soryu, do you wish to return to this? Or would you like to go
back to what you were?"
Asuka said nothing. She only sighed, thinking it over. She'd really
been happy back in that other world, and going back only meant pain.
But...
"Soryu...I would like to ask that you return."
Asuka looked up, this having been the first time she'd ever heard Rei
ask for _anything_. "What?" she asked.
"I ask that you return," Rei repeated. "Ikari-kun was faced with the
same choice you were, and he chose to leave the fantasy in favor of
the reality. I will honor his choice, and I know that other people
will have the capacity to go back as well, but you are the first to
reach this point."
"Why is it important that I go back?" Asuka asked, rubbing at her arm.
It still hurt like hell, but it wasn't paralyzing, anymore.
"Because in choosing to return, Ikari-kun returned to a life where he
is completely alone. No one else has gone back yet."
"That idiot _wants_ to be alone," Asuka said, turning away. "Why
should I give up happiness for him?"
"Because he does not want to be alone," Rei said. "He wants
acceptance and affection. Just like you do."
Asuka turned around, intending to disagree. But looking into Rei's
intense eyes, she knew arguing would be useless. And it would be a
lie to say she wasn't like that, anyway.
"You were someone he admired," Rei said, her voice still dead calm.
"He may find the will to go on if he has someone to confide in and
rely on."
"I'm no one's shoulder to cry on," Asuka said.
"You both need someone to rely on," Rei replied. "Such is the way of
things, when you choose to have individuality."
Asuka looked away again. "Why don't _you_ go back to him, then?" she
asked. She'd meant to sound angry, but her voice actually sounded
calm, now.
"I...cannot," Rei said. "My body was utterly destroyed. All I have
now is my soul," she said. "You _are_ able to return, however."
Asuka turned away. "That baka..." she said, clenching her good fist.
She _wanted_ to ditch his sorry spineless ass. She wanted to leave
him behind to rot. She wanted to forget Shinji Ikari had ever
existed.
Or, at least, that was what she was trying to convince herself of.
Asuka took a deep breath and let it out slowly, closing her eyes.
"All right," she said. "I'll do it." She turned back to face Rei.
"I'll do it. But not because _you_ asked me to, Wondergirl."
"Very well," Rei said. She closed her eyes.
Asuka blinked as the world shifted around them once more. Now they
were both standing on the surface of water. Only it wasn't water...it
was LCL.
Shinji was sitting not far from them. Asuka could see her body lying
there next to him. It was an odd experience, looking at herself like
that.
Shinji looked back to them. His face looked haggard and only barely
sane. But his eyes flickered with recognition.
"He can see us?" Asuka whispered to Rei.
"He sees what he wishes to see," Rei said. Shinji looked away from
them, and down to Asuka's body.
"Come, this way." She grabbed Asuka's hand and took a step towards
Shinji.
In an instant, Asuka's point of view changed. Now she was looking up,
at Shinji's face close-up. His hands were...around her neck? What
was he trying to do? And why couldn't she feel anything?
^I ask that you be gentle to Ikari-kun,^ Rei's voice sounded in
Asuka's mind. ^He is strong and will recover, but only if he has
someone he can rely on.^
Asuka watched as her arm came up, apparently of its own accord. It
gently touched Shinji's face, caressing him.
^Are you doing this?^ Asuka asked, only able to think of how weird
this was.
^Yes,^ Rei's voice responded, simply. ^I only want to make sure
Ikari-kun doesn't do something he will later regret.^
Shinji let go of Asuka's neck, and turned away, crying like a baby.
Asuka watched her arm drop back to the ground.
^I...need to go, now,^ Rei said. ^My responsibility lies with the sea
of LCL.^
Asuka felt Rei's presence start to leave her mind. ^A...Ayanami?^ she
asked.
There was no response for a moment. Then, Rei's voice sounded again.
^Yes?^ she asked, polite as ever.
^Th...thank you...Ayanami.^
There was another long pause, so long that Asuka was sure Rei had
left. But the girl's voice came, one last time.
^You are welcome, Soryu. Please take care of Ikari-kun.^
And like that, she was gone. Also, just like that, Asuka snapped back
to reality. She became aware of the ground underneath her, and the
cold air around her. Her eye and hand hurt, badly, but it was
bearable. She also noticed she was looking at Shinji.
"I feel sick," she said, speaking her mind for the sole sake of
hearing her own voice. ^Good, so I haven't lost that.^
She slowly sat up, though the exertion made her dizzy, as though she
hadn't exercised in years. Her vision blurred suddenly. ^Jeez, am I
_that_ out of shape?^ she asked herself.
It's said that the eyes are the windows of the soul. What Asuka
didn't know was that, for a few short moments, her eyes had been
colored a mix of blue and red, forming an almost perfect brown. But
that had only been while Rei had been accompanying her. Now, as her
vision cleared, her eyes shifted colors, going back to their old
brilliant blue.
She blinked, looking around. It was hard, looking through just one
eye. On impulse, she reached up, grabbed at the bandage over her left
eye, and tugged. It pulled away rather easily. She looked down,
seeing a smear of blood on it. But as she closed her right eye, she
quickly became aware that her left eye was still working fine.
She looked up, at the horizon. Her eyes widened. There, on the
horizon, was half of a head. Only it was _enormous_. To be that far
away, and still have so much detail visible...if that thing had ever
been connected to a body, the creature must have been mind-bogglingly
huge.
It was also unmistakably Rei's head that was out there.
"Wonder Gi...Ayanami..." Asuka whispered, getting to her feet. "I
guess you _meant_ it to say your body was destroyed."
In this time, Shinji had managed to partially pull himself together.
He looked up at Asuka, his face desperate.
"It's all right," Asuka said, looking down at him. "I'm still alive.
I..." she trailed off, looking back to the head on the horizon.
Shinji followed her gaze, trying to see what was happening.
The head was falling apart. It had apparently decided to start
following the laws of physics, and was now collapsing in under its own
weight. The head imploded, the huge red eyeball falling out and into
the LCL. Then, as the horrified children watched, the head melted,
dissolving into the LCL that surrounded it.
Asuka immediately turned, fell to her knees, and got violently sick on
the ground. Shinji followed suit a moment later.
They were only able to stop after several minutes, collapsing onto
their backs and looking to the sky, trying to keep themselves
collected. Both of them felt tears starting to stream down their
faces.
It was just too much...too much for them to handle all at once.
Asuka's mind searched wildly for something to distract it from the
abomination it had just witnessed.
"So now what?" Asuka asked, not looking over at Shinji. She was
answered with just a pathetic groan.
"You can do better than tha..." Asuka tried to say, but stopped
herself. ^Stop it,^ she chided herself. ^This isn't the time.^ She
turned her head to look at him, to see him shivering on the ground.
Quietly, Asuka reached over and touched him. Shinji groaned pitifully
and rolled away. Asuka reached over further and touched him again.
"It's okay..." she said. "It's over, I guess..."
Shinji let out a breath that made his whole body shudder. "The
city," he said.
"Hm?" Asuka asked.
"The city." He rolled over, looking back to her. He still looked
quite haggard, but a bit more sane that he'd been a moment ago.
"You...asked me what now. I think there's a city nearby..." he said,
looking up.
Asuka glanced over her shoulder, to see the ruins of Tokyo-2 in the
background. "I guess..." she said. ^God, what _are_ we supposed to
do now?^
She got up, then helped Shinji to his feet. "Let's at least get
walking," Asuka suggested, leading him forwards. Shinji complied,
looking at the ground. But after a moment, he looked back up, setting
his jaw.
"Yes," he said, trying to keep control over himself. "Let's get
going. We can't just break down...no more running away." The last
part was said more to himself than anyone else. He sounded like he
was going to need a _lot_ of convincing before he started beliving it
himself.
Asuka followed closely. ^Well, thanks, Ayanami,^ she thought. ^But
damn...what a job I've got ahead of me.^
She straightend herself out. Even if Shinji hadn't really believed
himself, it definitely was _not_ time to just give up. It sounded
like other people would be coming back...they just had to be ready.
And unti then...they'd get by.
She hoped.
---------------------------------------------------------------- ------
Endnote: These memories are deeply buried in Asuka's mind, so she
normally wouldn't remember them. That's why it never came up before.
As for what Rei might remember...that's something for the next chapter
to handle.
--------------------------------------------------------------- -------
Started: April 17, 2001
Ended: April 18, 2001
Send comments to: otakusadist@hotmail.com
And visit my site: http://www.angelfire.com/anime2/shinjirei
are not mine. I make no claim to them. They are used without
permission.
Foreword: This is a side story. It's not critically important to the
actual fic, but it should help explain a few things you're probably
wondering about (when did Asuka become nicer, and what happened to the
giant Rei head, for example).
-------------------------------------------------------- --------------
Angels of Armageddon
Author: Ryan Xavier
Side Story 1: Asuka's Story
Asuka shivered as the biomechanoid came to life. Luckily for her, she
was already asleep, and so wasn't bothered.
Not consciously, anyway.
Probably as a result of too much booze, along with the awakening MP
Eva, Asuka's sleepy mind was shocked back into a memory buried in her
subconscious. She began to dream.
* * *
"Hey, I know you!" the strange blue-haired girl was shouting. "You're
the pervert who was looking at my panties!"
Asuka jumped to her feet. "And what do you mean by that? Why're you
picking on him?"
"What's up with you? Are you two doing it?" the other girl asked.
Asuka stammered incoherently, succeeding only in getting very mad.
"Hey, calm down!" Hikari was shouting, trying to stop this before it
got violent. "This isn't a bar!"
"Oh, let it go on," Misato said, lounging in her chair. "This is more
interesting than the lesson, anyway."
The class laughed. Asuka and Shinji both blushed. After a moment,
the girl...what was her name?...Rei something...whoever-she-was
figured out it had gone on a little too far. She took a breath,
forcing herself to calm down.
"Just don't do it again," Rei said. She tried to sound polite, though
that was difficult to do, saying it through clenched teeth.
Asuka sat down, still fuming, but not wanting to say anything, since
that would just draw more attention of the wrong kind. She was
probably going to end up carrying buckets for this...
* * *
The rest of the day somehow passed without much incident. The new
girl quickly became popular among the other girls, proving to be
outgoing and quite friendly once you got to know her. This, of
course, pulled attention off of Asuka, something the German girl hated
to see happen.
But oddly enough, even though Asuka hated to lose attention like this,
she was at the same time excited to be seeing this happen. Before
today, she hadn't had any competition for being the most popular girl
in school. Now she did. And there was nothing like a little
competition to get Asuka's blood going.
While she was walking back home with Shinji, she was plotting what
she'd do tomorrow to try taking back some of the limelight. The boy
saw the malicious grin spreading across Asuka's face, and was vaguely
frightened. He didn't know what it meant.
"Er...sorry about this morning..." he said, hesitantly.
Asuka's blue eyes flickered over to Shinji, who flinched as the girl's
full attention switched over to him. ^Okay, I might have lost the
popularity contest for today,^ Asuka thought, ^but I can still get
some fun out of Shinji, here.^
"Well, you should be!" Asuka shot back at him, prodding him with words
to try and get a rise out of him. "Eyeing a defenseless young girl
like that! I swear, all boys are perverts."
"B-but it was just an accident!"
"Hah! Well, I better not be seeing you doing that to _me_," she said
haughtily.
"O-okay, Asuka. I'll never do that. I don't even want to."
"And what do you mean by _that?!_" Asuka shouted back, shifting gears
entirely. "You mean I'm not even worth it?"
Shinji, now thoroughly confused, could only look at the ground and
mumble apologetically.
Asuka smiled to herself. ^One day,^ she thought. ^One day, he
_might_ actually respond. That might be fun...^
Her mood was much better now. It stayed that way as she left Shinji
at the Ikari apartment. She was still quite contented with herself
when she made it to her house.
"I'm home!" Asuka called out as she stepped through the door.
"Oh, hello Asuka," a voice called out from the kitchen. "How was your
day?"
"It was okay, mom," she said, stepping out of her shoes. She walked
past the kitchen, where Zepplin Soryu could be seen making something
for dinner. Asuka's mouth started to water at the smell.
Smiling still, Asuka walked across the living room, dropping her
school bag on the couch. She stepped down the hallway, taking the
ribbon off of her school uniform and already deciding what clothes she
should change into for the afternoon. She threw open the door to her
room...
...and saw a human body hanging from the ceiling.
Asuka blinked, not believing it at first. She gasped sharply,
stepping back.
"M...mom...?" she called out, weakly.
The body rotated slowly, the rope around its neck slowly twisting.
Asuka, sickened and frozen to the floor, could only watch as the dead
face of her mother looked back at her.
Asuka screamed. She stepped backwards again, only to be stopped as
she hit a wall. She screamed again, covering her eyes with her hands
so she didn't have to look.
Then, all of a sudden...something changed. She felt the very _air_
shift around her. Shuddering and trying hard not to throw up, she
opened her eyes, carefully looking up.
It looked like she was underwater. But she was still breathing...when
had this happened?
"So your mind rejected it," came a calm voice from off to her side.
Asuka turned her head, looking in the direction of the voice. There,
standing quietly with her arms crossed behind her back, was that blue-
haired girl. But although she looked the same, she didn't..._feel_
the same. This girl gave off an aura of coldness and uncaring, and
those eyes stared at Asuka with inhuman intensity.
Asuka got to her feet. "What did you _do_ to me, Wondergirl?" she
asked, trying to work up some anger. She didn't know where that
nickname had come from, but she didn't care. If she could just get
angry, maybe she could flush that image of her mother hanging from her
mind...
"I did nothing," Rei replied, quietly. Only her lips moved; she
didn't even appear to be shifting her balance like a normal human
would. "Your mind created your version of utopia, and then rejected
it."
"What?" Asuka asked. Rei just stared back at her.
Then, with a suddenness that made the girl lose her balance, Asuka's
memories returned. She held her head, crying out in pain as she fell
to her knees.
"No!" she cried out. "Mama! Mama, don't leave me! Don't..."
She got a hold of herself, gasping for breath again. She again became
aware that the environment had changed. She opened her eyes, seeing
that she was now waist-deep in water. She was also wearing a bright
red, skintight bodysuit. What was it called? A plugsuit...
"You chose to reject false pleasure," Rei said. The girl was still in
a standing position, somehow standing on the surface of the water, as
though not bothering herself with trivial things like the laws of
physics.
"No..." Asuka said, glaring back at Rei. "_You_ did something! It's
_your_ fault, you damn _doll!_"
She lunged at Rei, though the deep water made that rather difficult.
She still made it to the girl and threw a punch...
...only to watch as her fist passed right through Rei, as though the
girl were made of nothing but mist.
"I may have caused Third Impact," Rei responded, apparently not even
paying attention to what Asuka was doing. "...but it was unavoidable
by that point. Someone had to control the outcome, and I chose that
it would be Ikari-kun."
"What the..." Asuka muttered, looking at her fist. Fist + flesh =
punch, right? It shouldn't just go right _through_ the target...and
what had Rei just said? She caused _Third_Impact?!_
"Your body has been reduced to its primordial components," Rei said.
"And your mind was incorporated into the rest of humanity's. But like
Ikari-kun, you've rejected it."
Asuka blinked, trying to understand what Rei was saying.
"You now have a choice," Rei said. "This is a critical time...I doubt
the rest of humanity will have this kind of opportunity. You can
choose to return to your perfect world, or you can go back to the
world as it is."
"As it is..." Asuka thought. She remembered the world as it had been,
all right. What had she been doing? She'd just found her mama...and
then...
Asuka's eyes focused on something invisible in the distance. The next
moment, she cried out, falling to her knees as she felt her left eye
explode into pain. It felt like she'd just been stabbed! But, there
hadn't been anything to stab her...
"You remember," Rei commented, watching blood flow around Asuka's
fingers. Asuka barely heard her; her mind was scrambled from the
pain. Asuka's right arm stiffened, then reached out into the air.
Asuka shakily turned her head, watching with her good eye.
Asuka screamed in absolute agony as her right arm was split in half
the long way. She clutched at the ruined limb, as blood poured out of
her and stained the water she was standing in.
Finally, Asuka choked, spitting up blood as she felt her torso
punctured in over a dozen places, as though long knives had just been
rammed completely through her body. She collapsed into a twitching
heap of pain and suffering.
"Your mind was one with the Eva when it was killed," Rei said, walking
up to Asuka. "You are remembering its pain, not your own."
The girl took Asuka by her legs and shoulders, lifting her up out of
the bloody water and placing her on an invisible ledge.
"Mama..." Asuka whimpered out. "Mama, help me..."
"I will try," Rei replied. Asuka looked up as she felt the pain in
her body lessen. She opened her eyes as she felt some pressure being
applied to her head.
Rei had just placed a wadded bandage over Asuka's left eye. Asuka
looked down, to see her arm had been bandaged, too. Judging from the
lack of pain, there was probably a similar treatment to her torso,
only hidden underneath the plugsuit. How Rei gotten there without
Asuka noticing was beyond the German girl's knowledge, but she didn't
care.
"...thanks," Asuka said, grudgingly. She looked away from the red-eyed girl.
"As the new Lillith, mother of all things, it was my responsibility.
Now Soryu, do you wish to return to this? Or would you like to go
back to what you were?"
Asuka said nothing. She only sighed, thinking it over. She'd really
been happy back in that other world, and going back only meant pain.
But...
"Soryu...I would like to ask that you return."
Asuka looked up, this having been the first time she'd ever heard Rei
ask for _anything_. "What?" she asked.
"I ask that you return," Rei repeated. "Ikari-kun was faced with the
same choice you were, and he chose to leave the fantasy in favor of
the reality. I will honor his choice, and I know that other people
will have the capacity to go back as well, but you are the first to
reach this point."
"Why is it important that I go back?" Asuka asked, rubbing at her arm.
It still hurt like hell, but it wasn't paralyzing, anymore.
"Because in choosing to return, Ikari-kun returned to a life where he
is completely alone. No one else has gone back yet."
"That idiot _wants_ to be alone," Asuka said, turning away. "Why
should I give up happiness for him?"
"Because he does not want to be alone," Rei said. "He wants
acceptance and affection. Just like you do."
Asuka turned around, intending to disagree. But looking into Rei's
intense eyes, she knew arguing would be useless. And it would be a
lie to say she wasn't like that, anyway.
"You were someone he admired," Rei said, her voice still dead calm.
"He may find the will to go on if he has someone to confide in and
rely on."
"I'm no one's shoulder to cry on," Asuka said.
"You both need someone to rely on," Rei replied. "Such is the way of
things, when you choose to have individuality."
Asuka looked away again. "Why don't _you_ go back to him, then?" she
asked. She'd meant to sound angry, but her voice actually sounded
calm, now.
"I...cannot," Rei said. "My body was utterly destroyed. All I have
now is my soul," she said. "You _are_ able to return, however."
Asuka turned away. "That baka..." she said, clenching her good fist.
She _wanted_ to ditch his sorry spineless ass. She wanted to leave
him behind to rot. She wanted to forget Shinji Ikari had ever
existed.
Or, at least, that was what she was trying to convince herself of.
Asuka took a deep breath and let it out slowly, closing her eyes.
"All right," she said. "I'll do it." She turned back to face Rei.
"I'll do it. But not because _you_ asked me to, Wondergirl."
"Very well," Rei said. She closed her eyes.
Asuka blinked as the world shifted around them once more. Now they
were both standing on the surface of water. Only it wasn't water...it
was LCL.
Shinji was sitting not far from them. Asuka could see her body lying
there next to him. It was an odd experience, looking at herself like
that.
Shinji looked back to them. His face looked haggard and only barely
sane. But his eyes flickered with recognition.
"He can see us?" Asuka whispered to Rei.
"He sees what he wishes to see," Rei said. Shinji looked away from
them, and down to Asuka's body.
"Come, this way." She grabbed Asuka's hand and took a step towards
Shinji.
In an instant, Asuka's point of view changed. Now she was looking up,
at Shinji's face close-up. His hands were...around her neck? What
was he trying to do? And why couldn't she feel anything?
^I ask that you be gentle to Ikari-kun,^ Rei's voice sounded in
Asuka's mind. ^He is strong and will recover, but only if he has
someone he can rely on.^
Asuka watched as her arm came up, apparently of its own accord. It
gently touched Shinji's face, caressing him.
^Are you doing this?^ Asuka asked, only able to think of how weird
this was.
^Yes,^ Rei's voice responded, simply. ^I only want to make sure
Ikari-kun doesn't do something he will later regret.^
Shinji let go of Asuka's neck, and turned away, crying like a baby.
Asuka watched her arm drop back to the ground.
^I...need to go, now,^ Rei said. ^My responsibility lies with the sea
of LCL.^
Asuka felt Rei's presence start to leave her mind. ^A...Ayanami?^ she
asked.
There was no response for a moment. Then, Rei's voice sounded again.
^Yes?^ she asked, polite as ever.
^Th...thank you...Ayanami.^
There was another long pause, so long that Asuka was sure Rei had
left. But the girl's voice came, one last time.
^You are welcome, Soryu. Please take care of Ikari-kun.^
And like that, she was gone. Also, just like that, Asuka snapped back
to reality. She became aware of the ground underneath her, and the
cold air around her. Her eye and hand hurt, badly, but it was
bearable. She also noticed she was looking at Shinji.
"I feel sick," she said, speaking her mind for the sole sake of
hearing her own voice. ^Good, so I haven't lost that.^
She slowly sat up, though the exertion made her dizzy, as though she
hadn't exercised in years. Her vision blurred suddenly. ^Jeez, am I
_that_ out of shape?^ she asked herself.
It's said that the eyes are the windows of the soul. What Asuka
didn't know was that, for a few short moments, her eyes had been
colored a mix of blue and red, forming an almost perfect brown. But
that had only been while Rei had been accompanying her. Now, as her
vision cleared, her eyes shifted colors, going back to their old
brilliant blue.
She blinked, looking around. It was hard, looking through just one
eye. On impulse, she reached up, grabbed at the bandage over her left
eye, and tugged. It pulled away rather easily. She looked down,
seeing a smear of blood on it. But as she closed her right eye, she
quickly became aware that her left eye was still working fine.
She looked up, at the horizon. Her eyes widened. There, on the
horizon, was half of a head. Only it was _enormous_. To be that far
away, and still have so much detail visible...if that thing had ever
been connected to a body, the creature must have been mind-bogglingly
huge.
It was also unmistakably Rei's head that was out there.
"Wonder Gi...Ayanami..." Asuka whispered, getting to her feet. "I
guess you _meant_ it to say your body was destroyed."
In this time, Shinji had managed to partially pull himself together.
He looked up at Asuka, his face desperate.
"It's all right," Asuka said, looking down at him. "I'm still alive.
I..." she trailed off, looking back to the head on the horizon.
Shinji followed her gaze, trying to see what was happening.
The head was falling apart. It had apparently decided to start
following the laws of physics, and was now collapsing in under its own
weight. The head imploded, the huge red eyeball falling out and into
the LCL. Then, as the horrified children watched, the head melted,
dissolving into the LCL that surrounded it.
Asuka immediately turned, fell to her knees, and got violently sick on
the ground. Shinji followed suit a moment later.
They were only able to stop after several minutes, collapsing onto
their backs and looking to the sky, trying to keep themselves
collected. Both of them felt tears starting to stream down their
faces.
It was just too much...too much for them to handle all at once.
Asuka's mind searched wildly for something to distract it from the
abomination it had just witnessed.
"So now what?" Asuka asked, not looking over at Shinji. She was
answered with just a pathetic groan.
"You can do better than tha..." Asuka tried to say, but stopped
herself. ^Stop it,^ she chided herself. ^This isn't the time.^ She
turned her head to look at him, to see him shivering on the ground.
Quietly, Asuka reached over and touched him. Shinji groaned pitifully
and rolled away. Asuka reached over further and touched him again.
"It's okay..." she said. "It's over, I guess..."
Shinji let out a breath that made his whole body shudder. "The
city," he said.
"Hm?" Asuka asked.
"The city." He rolled over, looking back to her. He still looked
quite haggard, but a bit more sane that he'd been a moment ago.
"You...asked me what now. I think there's a city nearby..." he said,
looking up.
Asuka glanced over her shoulder, to see the ruins of Tokyo-2 in the
background. "I guess..." she said. ^God, what _are_ we supposed to
do now?^
She got up, then helped Shinji to his feet. "Let's at least get
walking," Asuka suggested, leading him forwards. Shinji complied,
looking at the ground. But after a moment, he looked back up, setting
his jaw.
"Yes," he said, trying to keep control over himself. "Let's get
going. We can't just break down...no more running away." The last
part was said more to himself than anyone else. He sounded like he
was going to need a _lot_ of convincing before he started beliving it
himself.
Asuka followed closely. ^Well, thanks, Ayanami,^ she thought. ^But
damn...what a job I've got ahead of me.^
She straightend herself out. Even if Shinji hadn't really believed
himself, it definitely was _not_ time to just give up. It sounded
like other people would be coming back...they just had to be ready.
And unti then...they'd get by.
She hoped.
---------------------------------------------------------------- ------
Endnote: These memories are deeply buried in Asuka's mind, so she
normally wouldn't remember them. That's why it never came up before.
As for what Rei might remember...that's something for the next chapter
to handle.
--------------------------------------------------------------- -------
Started: April 17, 2001
Ended: April 18, 2001
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