Original Stories Fan Fiction ❯ Nishi Kaze ❯ Vol. 4, Chapter Twenty-Eight: Taste ( Chapter 28 )

Taste

*Shizuma*

It's starting again. I'm beginning to feel the hunger. The craving for blood is back. I can feel it already. It always starts off small. Just little thoughts about that intoxicating fluid flood my mouth like a powerful wine. I try to ignore it. But when I do, the craving gets worse. Pains in my chest, sweat, nausea, agony, madness, and craving that I have never known before in my life. The more I withdrawal, the uglier it gets. I would have to get blood before I lose my mind. But where can I get some new blood? I looked down in the bed with me. Yuki was sound asleep next to me. My hunger flared instantly. My heart began pounding. I began breathing heavily. I could see the blood running through every single vein of his sweet body. My teeth began to form. That sick voice in my head returned again.

“You love him Shizuma,” it began saying. “Give Yuki dark gift. Yes, he can live with you forever!” I shut my eyes tightly and shook my head. No! I cannot bring myself to do that to him! He has to stay pure for my seek! I need… I need… I need to get away from him again. I climbed out of bed and walked over to the screen door. The night seems so clear. An icy feeling came over me again. This was what I was afraid of. My sick cravings were why I didn't get attached to anyone. I was always scared of killing them in the end. Yuki might end up as my latest victim.

I shut my eyes and shook my head again. No! I can't let that happen! I will not run away! I can fight this! I can overcome my curse. I looked over at Yuki. He looked so innocent sleeping. My heart ached for him again. He doesn't know anything about me. I'm afraid to tell him. He'll probably run away from me like everyone else. I can't have that either. This is my battle own. But what I can do with him? There is no way in hell that he is going to give up on me. He's proved that too well. What if I let him down easily? No pain. Just a clean break. I'll just tell him I need a break for a few days. Sure, my grades will suffer some. Bah! But, that's a small price to pay in order to get better, right? I sighed in distress. I know this wasn't going to be easy. But why does it hurt my so much in the long run?

The next morning wasn't any better. I walked to school in silence. Yuki did most of the talking as usual. I tried my best to act like I was listening. I could barely focus at all. The words were just floating past my head. Yuki's voice was so muffled to me. It was as if I was underwater. My head seemed to be disconnected from my body. I began to try and force all bad thoughts out of my mind. Blood-drinking is like doing coke. The thoughts never really leave you. They just shrink and hide for a while. Then when you least expect it, they spring out like a surprise attack and never leave. This is always the first battle of an addiction. The war has began. If I can just stay alone in my head, I will be fine.

“Shizu-kun!” someone yelled to me. I looked up to see my love. Yuki was looking at me in concern.

“Are you even listening to me?” he asked.

“Yes!” I said without blinking. Yuki looked at me suspiciously at first. Oh crap! Has he begun to tell if I am lying or not? I put on my usual stoic face. Yuki smiled again.

“Great!” he said. Then, he went on with the talking. I smiled a little bit. Just keep inside your head and act like you're listening. Everything will be fine.

I don't know why I tell myself that lie when I go through a withdrawal. Maybe, it's motivation to keep going. Maybe, it's for Yuki's sake. I don't really know. But, that little tricks not working today. Today is going to be a bitch. The morning class wasn't helping me either. I could barely focus at all. The teacher's voice seemed so faint today. Thoughts of blood were washing around in my mind. I blinked hard to block them out. But, the thoughts just kept on coming. Uh oh! I feel it coming again. The craving is coming back. Pretty soon, my head started to ache. I started taking in deep breaths. I slowly opened my eyes after two minutes. I can see it all. Their blood cries out for me to drink it. The scent proved to be overpowering for me. I began to feel dizzy. I could barely think anymore. My head is killing me. My body broke out in a cold sweat. The pain… is… going… to me… I don't know how much more I can take. I quickly got up from my seat and ran to the bathroom. I didn't care who was watching me.

 

*Yuki*

I watched on in worry. Something is wrong with Shizu-kun. I just know it. He never tells me, but I know. I saw it in his eyes this morning. That tough guy doesn't work anymore. I know him too well. And something tells me he needs my help now. The teacher looked on worried.

“Can somebody go check on Shizuma?” she asked aloud. I raised my hand high.

“I'll go,” I said. The teacher breathed out.

“Thank you, Fujita-kun,” she said to me. I bowed my head and hurried out to the bathroom.

I walked into the bathroom and looked around. “Shizu-kun!” I called out. “Shizu-kun, where are you?” Then, I heard loud panting. I quickly jerked my head upwards. I saw my love huddled on the floor in tears. He was trembling all over. He looked like he would throw up. My heart ached for him again.

“Shizu-kun,” I said to him. “Shizu-kun, it's me! Are you okay?” He didn't answer me at all. Shizu-kun just slowly looked up at me. His eyes were a deep wine red. I was a little scared, but didn't show it. He needed me after all. I couldn't abandon him now. Not like this.

 

*Shizuma*

The pain in my chest increased once again. I thought that was going to die. The whole room seemed to be closing in on me right now. It all seemed so dark all of a sudden. I could see all Yuki's hot blood flowing through his body. I could hear his heart pounding loudly in my ears. I became dizzy again. My hunger shot up higher in my mind. I shut my eyes tightly. “Please go away!” I thought. “You're only making the problem worse by being here! Go away from me now!” He still kept coming towards me. The pain and temptation grow much worse. I cried out in deep agony. I could feel the pain taking over my body now. I couldn't breathe anymore. Was this going to be the end of me? Would Yuki die at my hands? Would I succumb to my sick blood thirsty desires again? No! I can't let it end this way! But I can't fight it now…

 

*Yuki*

I was in a panic now. I had never seen Shizu-kun like this before. He's in really deep pain I can tell. I began to fear for the worst. I hurried right over to my love. I reached out to him.

“Shizu-kun!” I said to him. When I got close enough to touch him, my love slapped my hand away from him. I stepped back startled.

“Shizu-kun,” I called again. “What's wrong?”

“Go away!” he hissed to me in his little huddle. I looked at him confused.

“Shizu-kun,” I said again. “What's the matter?”

“JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, OKAY?!? DAMN IT!!!” he yelled at me as he shoved me again. Shizu-kun then rose to his feet and flew out of the bathroom window. I watched him with my heart in deep pain. I sank down to my knees. “Shizu-kun…” I thought with tears in my eyes. My heart ached for him so much. There must be something I could do for him.

 

*Shizuma*

I stood on the roof alone. The message is loud and clear to me now. I can't fight this alone. I have ignored this problem so long that I am in over my head. But, I can't turn to Yuki. I don't want to drag him in any deeper than I already have. I sighed and looked up at the sky. I don't know what to do now.

Then, I heard footsteps behind me. I turned and saw Yuki-chan staring right at me. He looked as if he was going to cry now. I shook my head frustrated. Damn it, why can't he just leave me alone?!? What the hell is wrong with this boy? Can't he see that I am a danger to him? Has love blinded that much that he can't take a hint? Damn him!

Clear and Present Danger