Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction / Sonic Series Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Universal Deathmatch ❯ Sailor Mercury vs. Ridley ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Universal Deathmatch, Fight #1 Sailor Mercury (from Sailor Moon) vs. Ridley (from Super Metroid)
by Grey Fox
2-03-2002

Author's Note: This is my first stab at a deathmatch fic. I've read so many that I wanna try writing
one. So be nice :P

Disclaimer: Sailor Mercury and the Sailor Moon anime series are the creation and property of
Takeuchi Naoko and Toei animation. Ridley and the Metroid series are the creation and property of
those giants of gaming, the geniuses at Nintendo. Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger
and Draco Malfoy are the creation and property of J. K. Rowling, and really don't belong in this
fic but they're in because I just felt like it. If you don't like that they're in here, tough.
I belong to myself, and Deathworks belongs to himself.


This fic is dedicated to Deathworks64, the biggest Sailor Mercury fan I know.



OK, enough of the disclaimers and dedications and all that other crap. Let's get this fic started,
shall we? Yes, we shall.

A taxi cab pulls up to an indoor stadium in the middle of a big city. Strewn above the entrance
is a banner that says "First Ever Universal Deathmatch".

The cab opens up, and out come Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley.

Draco: I can't believe the four of us all agreed to come here!
Harry: Oh, be quiet Malfoy.
Hermione: Yeah, we won free tickets to this, I'll take it.
Draco: Free tickets to what?! Some stupid tournament where a bunch of muggles beat the crap out
of each other?!
Ron: Uhhh, I hate to say it, but Draco has a point.
Hermione: (annoyed) Are you two blind? It says "UNIVERSAL" Deathmatch. There's going to be ALL
SORTS of people competing in this thing, not just muggles.
Harry: Yeah, I think she's right. I bet we can expect to see all sorts of interesting stuff here.
Draco: Oh yeah?! Like what, Potter?

All of a sudden, a big bus pulls up in front of the stadium. The doors open, and about two dozen or so
Zebesian space pirates come pouring out, charging past the four Hogwarts students and rushing through
the entrance doors of the stadium. The four kids just stood there the whole time silently watching the whole
thing happen.

Harry, Ron and Draco: O_o
Hermione: Like that.
Draco: (scowls at Hermione)

The four go on in and gets refreshments and stuff like that; that is, after Harry and Hermione have
to explain to Ron and Draco about the "muggle" snacks there. Then the four go in and find their
seats, which are behind and to the left of the commentator's booth ( think a WWF-type setup here ) .

Ron: Ooooh, whatdya know? Front-row seats!
Harry: Cool.
Draco: I still don't get how we won those free tickets. I mean, I don't even remember entering
any stupid contest.
Hermione: Yeah, and why the hell did we have to get stuck with you?
Draco: .....Shut up.

(the four sit down, order from left to right: Harry, Ron, Hermione, Draco)

Ron: So when's this show going to start?
Hermione: When the author gets here. This is a fanfic Ron.
Ron: Oh.

Just then, a 19-year old guy, about 5 foot 9 inches, with green eyes, messy curly black hair, and a
scruffy moustache and beard nonchalantly strides on out to the commentator's booth and puts on a headset.
Then he sits down in the middle of the table, props his feet up, and leans back in his chair, arms behind
his head.

???? ???: (turns to Hogwarts foursome): I see you made it here all right.
Ron, Hermione and Draco: .....?
Harry: Uhhh, who are you, and how did you know we'd be here?
???? ???: I'm the author. I'm Grey Fox.
Harry: Ah, I see.
Ron: But you're not grey, and you don't look anything like a fox.
Grey Fox: -_-;; Dumb ass! Grey Fox is just a character I chose as a pen name.
Hermione: Yeah, but you still don't look like Grey Fox.
Harry: What? What do you mean Hermione?
Hermione: Grey Fox is a cybernetic ninja with a powered exoskeleton who is a complete psychopathic mental
case.
Harry, Ron and Draco: O_o
Harry: Hermione, how do you know?
Hermione: (sighs) I've played Metal Gear Solid.
Draco: Ha! Just like a mudblood, playing stupid muggle games!
Hermione: Grrrr.....
Grey Fox: Don't sweat it, Hermy. I stuck a big-ass mallet under your seat in case you need to shut him up.
Hermione: Thank you. (whips out the mallet and clobbers Draco)
Draco: @_@;; Owwww......
Ron: Wait a minute, you knew we were coming here?
Grey Fox: Damn straight! How do you think you four got tickets to this?
Ron: But we won those in a contest or something!
Grey Fox: Yeah, a contest I rigged so you four would win.
Draco: Why the hell did you do that?
Grey Fox: Because I'm a review greedy bastard, and if you four are in this fic, more people will
read it. Let's face it, Harry Potter characters have become so insanely popular it's not even funny
anymore.
Harry, Ron, Hermione and Draco: -_-
Grey Fox: Just relax, and enjoy the show. Now it's time to start.

Grey Fox adjusts his headset, and turns to face the crowd, his voice now resounding throughout the stadium.

Grey Fox: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, and what-have-you, to the first ever UNIVERSAL DEATHMATCH!!!!!

Cheers and shouts from the audience.

Grey Fox: As the name implies, fighters from all around the known universe are going to battle in this
very stadium. This pomises to be a spectacle unlike anything you've witnessed before!

More cheers and shouts from the audience.

Grey Fox: And for our first match-up, I've got something that NO ONE here would expect!
Random Guy in Audience: Wesley Crusher vs. Barney the Dinosaur?
Grey Fox: (to guy who said that) DON'T YOU EVEN HINT AT THAT POSSIBILITY YOU SICK FREAK! (back to
whole audience) No, for our first match-up, we have the Sailor Senshi of Ice and Water, the super-intelligent
Sailor Mercury, versus the dreaded scourge of the galaxy, Ridley!!!!!!

Even more cheers and shouts from the audience.

Ron: Who are they?
Harry: I think I've heard of the Sailor Senshi before, but, who's Ridley?
Hermione: He's a big fire-breathing alien dragon who worked for Mother Brain and the space pirates.
Harry: How'd you know that?
Hermione: (sighs) I've also played Super Metroid.
Draco: Yet another stupid muggle's game you've played.
Hermione: (pissed) Shut up Malfoy!! (clobbers Draco with the mallet again)
Draco: @_@;; Will you STOP that already?!!
Hermione: When I feel like it.
Grey Fox: Now, before we start the fight, I'd like to introduce a couple people first. First of
all, I'd like to bring out the man who will be doing commentary along with me for these fights. He's a
fellow fanfiction author, and has been a good friend of mine ever since I joined the GTS communtiy, and
I couldn't NOT let him have the chance to see his favorite Senshi in action. So lets hear it for.......
DEATHWORKS!!!

Camera focuses on Deathworks as he walks into the arena and takes his place at the commentator's
booth to the left of Grey Fox.

Grey Fox: Hello DW. Good to have you here.
Deathworks: (putting on headset) Good to be here, Fox.
Grey Fox: You as excited about this match-up as I am, buddy?
Deathworks: Oh HELL yes!!! We're gonna see Ami kick some serious ass tonight!!!!
Grey Fox: Uhhh, DW?
Deathworks: Yeah?
Grey Fox: You always told me you liked Ami because of how caring and smart she is. I'm surprised
you're so eager to see her fight in a battle to the death.
Deathworks: Well Fox, it's just because I'm sick of all the anime fans out there who think Ami is
useless just because she can't blow every enemy to bloody chunks. This is the perfect opportunity for
Ami to show that intelligence and strategy count more than raw power.
Grey Fox: Yeah, true. So you predict Mercury will be the victor in this fight?
Deathworks: Definitely. She's got brains to spare and plenty of power. That dragon doesn't stand a chance!
Grey Fox: Well, I'm gonna get a second opinion on that, 'cause now I'm gonna bring out a special guest
commentator for this fight. It's my pleasure to introduce the one who really needs no indroduction, the killer
bounty huntress who is, and always will be, the true gaming diva. Crowd, give it up for Miss Nintendo, SAMUS
ARAN!!!

Crowd explodes into a thunderous uproar as the thousands of Metroid fans present cheer wildly as Samus Aran
walks on in, wearing her armor but without her helmet, waving at the crowd before coming to the commentator's
booth and taking her place to the right of Grey Fox, putting on a headset.

Grey Fox: Samus, words cannot describe the honor of having a living legend like you here with us tonight.
Samus Aran: No problem.
Grey Fox: So Samus, how are Metroid IV and Metroid Prime coming? I've been dying to know.
Samus Aran: Fox, Nintendo's being so secretive about them even I don't know how they're coming along!
Grey Fox: Doesn't surprise me. All the Metroid fans out there are still seething about Prime being a first-person
shooter. But at least Metroid IV is going to be a 2D platformer.
Samus Aran: True.
Grey Fox: Now then Samus, down to business. My friend here predicts a crushing victory for Sailor Mercury tonight.
Do you share the same opinion?
Samus Aran: I'm not quite as certain. Ridley is one tough opponent. Believe me, I'd know.
Deathworks: (vexed) WHAT?!!! How can you say that?!!! I'd expect you to back up a fellow superheroine....
Samus Aran: Look buddy, I'd be an idiot to underestimate Mercury's potential. But take it from someone who knows:
Ridley is no pushover.
Grey Fox: So true. He was the hardest boss in Super Metroid.
Deathworks: But you do hope that Ami will win right?
Samus Aran: Abso-fucking-lutely.
Deathworks: o_O;; Uhhh, okay then.
Grey Fox: (Jim Carrey voice) Alrighty then! (normal voice) Now that I've brought out our commentators, let's bring
out our combatants!! First off, here's the brains of the Sailor Senshi, with an IQ of 300 and the power of ice
and water magic behind her. Let's have a big round of applause for the Senshi of Wisdom, SAILOR MERCURY!!!!!

Crowd cheers again as Ami Mizuno, already in Senshi form, walks on out into the arena.

(in crowd, standing up) Haruka Tenou: ALL RIGHT!!!!! GO AMI!!!!!!!
(also in crowd, standing up) Michiru Kaiou: YOU GO MERCURY!!!!! YOU'RE GOING TO DOMINATE THIS MATCH!!!!!!!
Sailor Mercury: (blushes and waves at her comrades)
Samus Aran: Looks like a couple of the other Senshi came to watch Ami's fight as well.
Grey Fox: (turns to Deathworks) Well DW, what's it like to finally see Ami in the flesh?
Deathworks: O_O (staring unblinking at Mercury)
Grey Fox: Uhhh, DW, hello, you home?
Deathworks: Ami....dominate....yeah....uhhh......
Samus Aran: O_o;; (to Grey Fox) Is he alright Fox?
Grey Fox: *facefault* (muttering) Maybe it was a mistake to have him co-host this. (out loud) Now, for Mercury's
challenger, we have one of the most dreaded space pirates of all, Mother Brain's right-hand man.....
Samus Aran: And the one who kidnapped the closest thing I ever had to a child - fucking bastard.
Grey Fox: Uhhh Samus, please tone down the language a bit. There are children present.
Samus Aran: How can you tell the age of who's reading this?
Grey Fox: No I mean there are literally children present. (jerks a thumb back at the Harry Potter gang)
Samus Aran: (sees who he's referring to) Oh.
Grey Fox: Anyway, here's our other fighter, the insidious RIDLEY!!!!!!!

Crowd cheers as Ridley swoops into the stadium, flies down and takes his place in the arena. The two dozen
space pirates presnt hoop and haller.

Harry: Well, now we know what they're here for.
Grey Fox: It looks like both contestants are rearing to go!

In arena.

Ridley: Hey little girl, you can still back out now. I'd hate to have to rip apart your pretty little face.
Sailor Mercury: Forget it Ridley. If Samus can beat you, then so can I!

Back at commentator's booth.

Deathworks: O_O (still ogling Mercury) Mercury....beat....yeah....uhhh......
Samus Aran: Fox, do something about DW. He's getting really disturbing.
Grey Fox: Sure. (turns to HP gang) Hey Hermione, lemme borrow that mallet.
Hermione: Here. (tosses Fox the mallet)
Grey Fox: Thanks. (bashes DW with the mallet and tosses it back to Hermione)
Deathworks: @_@;; Owwww, okay okay, I'm snapped out of it!
Samus Aran: o_O
Grey Fox: Good, because you're here to do commentary, not ogle at Ami. (turns to his right and points) Hit it!!!!

Somewhere else in the stadium Stone Cold Steve Austin rings a big-ass gong, signalling the start of the match.

Grey Fox: Let the fight begin!!!!!!!!!!!

Ridley starts off by breathing out a volley of fireballs at Mercury, who deftly dashes to her right.

Deathworks: Ridley has wasted no time in getting this match started, but Ami's quickly gotten out of
harm's way!
Samus Aran: Yeah, but she can't keep that up forever, and Ridley knows it.
Ridley: You can't dodge me forever!
Samus Aran: See?
Sailor Mercury: Don't worry, I don't plan to just avoid you. SHABON SPRAY!!!

Sailor Mercury casts Shabon Spray, enveloping the area with a thick bubbly fog.

Grey Fox: Ahh yes, Ami's famous Shabon Spray spell. Works like a charm, as it has thrown off many a foe in
the past, but will it throw off Ridley?
Samus Aran: It might. Ridley's not exactly a rocket scientist himself.
Ridley: Gaahhhh! You'll have to do better than that!! (starts flapping wings)

While staying on the ground, Ridley beats his wings furiously to blow away the mist, but once he does, Sailor
Mercury is nowhere to be seen.

Ridley: You little coward!! Where are you?!!!!
Sailor Mercury: Hee hee, look behind you.....
Ridley: Wha?......

Ridley twirls his neck around to see Mercury right in front of his face. She's standing right on his back. Before
Ridley can overcome his surprise, Mercury takes action.

Sailor Mercury: SHABON SPRAY FREEZING!!!
Ridley: EEEEYYYAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!

Deathworks: What an ingenious setup! Under the cover of her fog, she got up on Ridley's back without him
noticing and delivered a painful attack!
Grey Fox: Yeowtch. Hit right in the face with Shabon Spray Freezing at point blank range. That DEFINES
painful.
Deathworks: Yeah! Go Ami! Show 'em what you can do! Woo-hoo! (whips out a banner that reads 'MERCURY RULZ')
Samus Aran: Yes!!!! Go Mercury!! Kick that dragon's sorry ass!!!!!!! (stands up and shakes fist)
Grey Fox: Ummm, you two, as commentators, we're supposed to be unbiased.
Draco: Well, obviously then those two were the last ones you should have picked.
Grey Fox: Hermy, hit him again for me.
Hermione: Love to. (clobbers Draco yet again with the mallet)
Draco: *_*;; Uhhhhhh..... (falls back in chair, almost unconscious)
Grey Fox: ^_^;; God how I love seeing her do that.

Right after blasting Ridley in the face with Shabon Spray Freezing, she hopped down onto the ground in front of
him and casts the same spell.

Sailor Mercury: Shabon Spray Freezing!
Ridley: Oh crap...what now?

Mercury's attack is directed at Ridley's feet. Soon his feet are stuck to the floor, encased in ice.

Sailor Mercury: That will keep you in place for what I have planned for you!!
Ridley: What?
Stone Cold Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: (yelling at SCSA) Don't you go and start that routine!!
Sailor Mercury: Shine Aqua Illusion!!!
Grey Fox: Hooo boy, Ridley's gonna be smartin' after this one....

Sailor Mercury collects a swirling mass of icy-cold water and hurls it at the hapless space pirate. The attack
hits him with such force that it knocks him off his feet and sends him flying into the arena wall. For a while
Ridley just lays there.

Samus Aran: Oh come on Ridley! I've hit you with charged ice beam shots more powerful than that! Get up!!
Deathworks: HEY!!! I thought you were on Ami's side.
Samus Aran: Yessss, but I don't want it to look like Ridley was too easy for her. I have a rep to keep up you
know.
Deathworks: (really pissed) Why you egotistical... (stands up)
Samus Aran: (gets up and raises weapon arm at DW) Talk to the spazer, Sailor fanboy!
Grey Fox: Knock it off you two! The fight's out there, not here!
Samus Aran and Deathworks: (mutter profanities as they sit back down)

Meanwhile, Ridley has become so enraged that the sheer power of his anger has caused him to block out all the pain
and take to the air. Once high enough, he let loose with his fireball breath at Ami. She tried to throw him off
again with Shabon Spray, but one of Ridley's volleys struck so close to her she was knocked off her feet. Before
she could recover, Ridley swooped down and lashed out at her with his tail, sending her flying across the arena.

Samus Aran: Ouch. I remember when he did that to me. That hurts.
Grey Fox: I'm sure it does, but even though Ami doesn't have a Chozo power suit to protect her, I have a feeling
she'll continue the fight all the same.
Deathworks: Come on Mercury! Get up! Get up!
Grey Fox: (to DW) Cool it....

Sure enough, Mercury is back on her feet just as Ridley is closing in on her for another tail lash attack.
But before he could get in range, Mercury let loose with another attack.

Sailor Mercury: Shabon Spray Freezing!
Ridley: Awww shit, not this ag..... (cut off as freezing bubbly mist engulfs him)
Samus Aran: Again with the bubble spray thing?
Grey Fox: Hey! Don't knock that attack of hers Sam. It's one of Ami's most diverse and useful moves.
Deathworks: Finally you take my side Fox.
Grey Fox: -_-;; Authoring a deathmatch isn't as easy as I thought.....

While Ridley is shrouded in the mist, Mercury activates her visor so she can see her adversary more
clearly. Then she readies another attack.

Sailor Mercury: Shine Aqua Illusion!!!
Ridley: (gets hit dead center with attack) Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Grey Fox: Oooooh, again with the Shine Aqua Illusion spell. He'll be feeling when it rains for quite a
while I betcha.

Ridley falls to the ground with a loud crash. Then he gets up and stares at Ami with glowing, hateful
red eyes.

Ridley: That's it! I'm through handling you with kid gloves! I'm not holding back anymore!!!
Sailor Mercury: Funny, I was about to say the same thing to you.

Royally pissed off, he flies up again and darts towards Mercury. But Mercury, being the cool-headed and
composed Senshi that she is, simply flips to the side and Ridley flies right past her, crashing into yet
another wall.

Sailor Mercury: Temper temper....
Ridley: (unprintable profanities)
Steve Austin: What?
Samus Aran: Such language Ridley! ^_^
Deathworks: She stays level-headed while everyone else loses it. I love it. (swoons at Mercury's display
of her intellect)
Grey Fox: -_-;; I know that you love it all too well DW.

Before Ridley can get back up, Sailor Mercury readies yet another attack....

Sailor Mercury: Mercury Aqua Rhapsody!!!
Grey Fox and Deathworks: (shudder)
Samus Aran: I take it Ridley's in for a world of hurt again, boys?
Grey Fox: You can say that.

Sailor Mercury plays the harp thingie and threads of icy crystalline water shoot out and strike Ridley
with tremendous force who howls out from the pain and rapid temperature drop.

Grey Fox: Mercury wasn't kidding. She's not holding anything back!
Deathworks: I told you she could do it! I told you she would win!
Samus Aran: Calm down DW. I wanna see Ridley get pounded too, but the fight's not over yet.
Sailor Mercury: Alright you space pirate, it's time to finish this! (motions for yet another attack)
Deathworks: Uh-oh, if she's gonna do what I think she is, then I think Ridley's had it.
Grey Fox: I think I getcha. Looks like she's doing that attack from her movie.
Samus Aran: What?! Sailor Mercury had her own movie?!
Deathworks: What's with you?
Grey Fox: She's still pissed that Tomb Raider got made into a movie instead of Metroid. And I agree;
Samus is way cooler than Lara, no questions asked.
Samus Aran: ^_^;; That's true, but then again most game-based movies aren't very good. Look at Super Mario Bros.
Grey Fox: Or...(shudders)...Final Fantasy.
Sam, Fox and DW: *gag*

Back to the fight. Mercury's primed to unload a good helping of Mercury Aqua Mirage on our helpless dragon friend.
But before she can, a Metroid comes out of nowhere and clamps down on her!

One of the space pirates: Yeah! Eat that, you little bitch!
Samus Aran and Deathworks: WHAT THE HELL?!!!!!!
Grey Fox: Errr, it looks like the space pirates had a Metroid larva handy in case Ridley was getting beat.
Haruka: The hell?! No way I'm letting this happen! C'mon Michiru!

Haruka and Michiru henshin and turn into Sailor Uranus and Sailor Neptune. But they find themselves surrounded by
space pirates.

Samus Aran: Shit! Those goddamn space pirates are attacking those two and they brought in a Metroid?!! That's
it, I'm taking action! (gets up and preps weapon arm)
Grey Fox: No need Sam.
Samus Aran: The hell are you saying?!
Grey Fox: Look. (points to Uranus and Neptune, who are beating the crap out of all the pirates with
ridiculous ease)
Deathworks: But what about Ami?
Grey Fox: DW, if any of the Senshi can deal with Metroids, it's Mercury.
Deathworks: What do you mean?

A large explosion mixed with the sound of ice shattering can be heard from the arena. Fox and DW turn
to see Mercury has gotten the Metroid off of her by freezing it off.

Grey Fox: That. You have to freeze Metroid larvae before blowing them up.
Deathworks: So she should be all right now?
Samus Aran: Not exactly. That Metroid was on her long enough to drain a good deal of energy from her.
She's probably been weakened a lot.

As if to echo Samus' statement, Ridley swoops down on Mercury and grabs her with his clawed feet, hoisting
her up, her not managing to resist at all. At a height of ten meters, he lets fer fall.

Sailor Mercury: AARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!
Ridley: Give it up girl, or I'll go higher next time!!!
Deathworks: Damnit Fox, you're the author! Do something!!
Grey Fox: I don't think I have to. Looks like Ami has a guardian angel tonight. (points up)
Deathworks and Samus Aran: Eh? (look up)

Charizard can be seen flying in, carrying a Donkey Kong hammer and a sports bag filled with unknown items.
He rams into Ridley full speed, knocking him to the ground. Charizard then proceeds to beat the shit outta
him with the DK hammer as a familiar little jingle is heard.

Commentators and HP gang: O_o
Samus Aran: Alright, why is that Pokemon making a ringside and helping Sailor Mercury out?
Grey Fox: Uhhh, best guess is that this is Ash's Charizard, and he's pissed at Ridley for the beating he
gave him in my fic "The Road to Redemption".
Deathworks: Hold it, I thought it was just in a dream that Ridley beat up Charizard in that fic of
yours.
Grey Fox: Obviously it doesn't matter to Chuck.

After he's done clobbering Ridley with the hammer, Charizard flies over to Mercury, gives her the sports bag, and
flies off. Mercury unzips the bag and looks at its contents.

Deathworks: Wonder what Charizard had in that bag.
Samus Aran: Let's watch and see.

Ami pulls out a pep drink, seen in the Kirby games; she drinks it and it's easy to see she feels a lot better.

Samus Aran: Wonder what else is in there.

Just as Ridley gets up and turns to face Ami, she's pulled out the rest of the bag's contents, which are....

Sam, Fox and DW: O_O
Samus Aran: It was a bunch....
Grey Fox: ....of super mushrooms....
Deathworks: ....from Super Smash Bros Melee?!!!!
Grey Fox: Oh dear God! Ridley's dead meat!!!!
Deathworks: I think I'm going to enjoy watching this.....
Ron: Huh?
Draco: (still dazed somewhat) What good are those things?
Harry and Hermione: Watch....

Ridley sees what Mercury is holding, and his face goes blank as the mushrooms take effect, causing
Ami to quadruple in size.

Ron and Draco: O_O
Grey Fox: (Ric Flair) Woooooo! (normal) I bet you're liking this, huh DW? (turns to DW)
Deathworks: O_O (ogling the giantess)
Grey Fox: Awww, not again....

Back in the arena, Mercury has wasted no time in exploiting her newfound advantage, as she has started to
physically pummel the alien dragon. Strong and powerful as he was, Ridley was totally helpless against the
giant Sailor Mercury.

Deathworks: O_O (starts drooling)
Grey Fox: Damnit, I thought you weren't into evil/crush GTS.
Samus Aran: Ummm, what *is* GTS anyway?
Grey Fox: -_-;; I'll explain later.

By now, it's painfully obvious that Ridley's had all the fight neaten outta him by Ami's giant fists. To
finish him off, she grabs him by the tail, twirls around, and then releases him, causing him to go flying
and he lands right on....

Harry: Ahhh look out......

Ridley lands right on the Hogwarts foursome.

Grey Fox: Ouchies. Well, unless those space pirates have a Queen Metroid ready to help out Ridley, he's had it.
Sailor Mercury is the winner of our first deathmatch.
Samus Aran: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Deathworks: O_O (still ogling Ami and drooling)
Samus Aran and Grey Fox: -_-
Hermione: (muffled voice) Hf gfft offf usffff yvv idiffff [Hey get off us you idiot!]

The four young wizards manage to kick Ridley offa them.

Ron: Damnit Ridley, are you always such a clumsy oaf?!
Ridley: Hey shut up you little brat!
Harry: Don't diss my friends! (pulls out his wand and zaps Ridley in the face; Hermione and Ron
follow suit)
Ridley: OWW OWW OWW OWW OWW!!!! (screams as he runs off, Harry, Ron and Hermione in hot pursuit, blasting him)
Draco: Hey, leave some for me! (draws wand and chases after them)
Grey Fox: OK, that was rather......odd.
Samus Aran: But amusing nonetheless.
Grey Fox: Yeah true.
Samus Aran: Well, I only agreed to guest-host this match so I could watch Ridley get pounded, so I'm
outta here. Take care, Fox. (gets up and leaves)
Grey Fox: (turns to DW, who's still off in happyland) Alright DW, enough is enough!
Sailor Mercury: Ummm, excuse me.
Grey Fox: (turns to see a 21ft Ami standing right in front of the commentator's booth) Uh, yes?
Sailor Mercury: Did I win?
Grey Fox: Errr, I'd say so.
Deathworks: O_O (nosebleed)
Grey Fox: \_/ (smacks forehead)
Sailor Mercury: (notices DW) Ummmm, is Deathworks alright?
Deathworks: (faints; has a smile on his face that looks totally inhuman)
Grey Fox: -_-;; Yeah it's just...(motions for Mercury to bend down so he can whisper in her ear)
Sailor Mercury: (obliges)
Grey Fox: (whispers something inaudible)
Sailor Mercury: (blushes beet red and eyes go wide) Oh.
Grey Fox: So....D'you think you can spend some time with him? Just talk with him and stuff? It'd mean
a lot to him, especially the way you are right now.....
Sailor Mercury: (shyly) Um, sure. (bends down to pick up the unconscious Deathworks and carries him out
of the arena)
Grey Fox: Well, at least Deathworks will be able to spend some time with his favorite anime character.
But damnit, now I need someone to take his place as commentator. (turns to Steve Austin)
Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: Hey Stone Cold.
Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: Need another commentator.
Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: Enough. You're it.
Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: (annoyed) You're my new....
Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: (really annoyed) I said....
Steve Austin: What?
Grey Fox: \_/
Steve Austin: What? What? What?
Grey Fox: (scary mean super-loud voice) DAMNIT AUSTIN!!! YOU'RE DOING CO-COMMENTARY WITH ME NEXT
CHAPTER, AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE, 'CAUSE GREY FOX SAID SO!!!!!!!
Steve Austin: (opens mouth)
Grey Fox: If you DARE say 'What?' again.....
Steve Austin: OK, OK!! I get the point.
Grey Fox: Thank you. (to audience) Well, that concludes our first deathmatch. Sailor Mercury wiped
the floor with that bastard Ridley. If you want more, be sure to send in the reviews letting me know
what you thought. Otherwise, I rigged a contest to get Harry Potter in here for nothing.




Author's Note: Well that's it. My first deathmatch. I had a lot of fun writing this. Hope you
all had fun reading this. Again, be sure to review telling me what you thought, so that I'll have an
incentive to continue.


So long,
Grey Fox