Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ MST: Humanity with short ❯ Fank's never gonna hear the end of this ( Chapter 2 )

(SOL)

CROW: Frank being beaten up by Team Rocket thinking they're Pikachus?

TOM: He's never going to let that one down.

MIKE: It could have been worse.

TOM: How?

MIKE: Matt could have beaten him up while the blonde stick was covering a boy band song.

BOTS: UGH!

CROW: How about being disemboweled by a guy in a Veemon costume?

MIKE & TOM: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

TOM: Or dismembered by a Trekie?

MIKE & CROW: WOHA!

MIKE: Well that's bad, but at least he wasn't beaten up by someone while they were screaming "Jeff Nimoy rules."

BOTS: UGH!

CROW: At least he wasn't maimed by someone who yelled…

(Lights go off)

ALL: FANFIC SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGNNNNN!

(Door sequence)

(ALL take their seats)

Thanks for your reviews, and sorry it took so long.

TOM: Why didn't you take longer?

I just want to get one thing out of the way:

CROW (Author): Pokemon rips off Digimon.

No, B.R.I.AN's real name is not Tai or anyone associated with Digimon.

MIKE: That's a relief.

I don't plain on having crossover with Digimon. At least, not now. :)

MIKE: That's not.

Also, I don't know how to spell some Pokemon names, so if I miss spell anything, just ignor it.

CROW: Or like we do, bash it.

We find our heroes lost (again) in the woods.

TOM: For they took directions from Ryoga Habbiki.

"Well Ash, thanks to your instincts we're lost, AGAIN!" Yelled Misty

"Toge toge toge preeeeeeee!" ("Don't yell at daddy again mommy!")

MIKE (Homer): Mmmmmmmmmm… scrabbled egg.

"Well, maybe if you quit nagging at me all the time…" Ash said,

TOM: Ash is with Marge Simpson?

but was interupted by Misty.

" I DO NOT!" Misty responded.

"DO TOO!"

"DO NOT!"

"DO TOO!"

MIKE: Ah, young love.

CROW: Ash and Misty, Ranma and Akane.

TOM: Like Ash, like Ranma? Think about it, won't you?

"Nock it off guys!" Brock told them,

CROW (Ash): I would, but I'm in public.

MIKE: Crow!

but they didn't hear him.

CROW: For there constant arguing made them def.

"I DO NOT!"

"DO TOO!"

TOM (Ash): Wait, what were we fighting about?

CROW (Misty): Who cares? Lets do it.

MIKE: Crow!

Pikachu had decided he had heard enough and, of course…

MIKE: Left to get his own show.

TOM: Isn't Pokemon his own show already?

"PIKACHUUUUUUUU!" ("STOP!")

CROW: In the name of love.

…thundershocks both Ash and Misty. After that, they calmed down a little.

TOM: But not by much.

"Sorry Ash, I'm just stressed out that we're lost." Misty said.

"It's okay Misty, I'm stressed too." Replied Ash.

TOM (Sarcastic): NO!

"Listen," Brock said, "why don't we rest hear for a while. This way, we can calm down and have enough energy to get to Humanity."

ALL: Oh God!

CROW: This is a bad sign.

TOM: The town has the same name as the title. This isn't good. THIS IS NOT GOOD!

MIKE: We don't know that.

(BOTS look at MIKE)

MIKE: Right. Written by a Digimon fan.

"Okay." They both said in unison.

"I'm going to a lake I saw a few minutes back to let my water Pokemon take a rest." Misty said.

CROW: Please let it be Crystal Lake. Please let it be Crystal Lake.

"Okay. Brock and I will get the fire wood." Ash said.

TOM (Butt-head): Wood.

BOTS (Bevus and Butt-head): Huh, heh, huh, heh, huh.

What they didn't notice was a figure hiding in the bushes.

MIKE: Its G. I. Joe.

"They're hear."

CROW (Person): …very well.

The figure said into a walky-talky.

"Yes. When you give me the signal,

TOM: The Bat-signal.

I'll take them down and get Pikachu. Out!"

MIKE: And about.

A few minutes latter…

Misty was watching her water Pokemon swimming and talking to Togepi.

CROW: And her ears were bleeding.

"Toge toge toge toge toge?" ("Why did you yell at daddy?")

TOM (Misty): Because daddy's a jerk.

"I was just angry with him that's all." Misty said.

"Toge toge toge toge?" ("Do you love daddy?")

ALL: Yes she does.

The only thing a shocked Misty could respond with was "Uh… um… why don't we go back to camp?"

CROW (Togipi): NO! I wanna stay here and annoy the fans even more.

"Toge!" ("Okay!")

Misty called her Pokemon and walked back to camp. While she was walking, she was in deep thought.

TOM: And now, Deep Thought. By Jack Handy.

"Am I in love with Ash?

ALL: Yes.

He's a nice guy and I wish that I could stop yelling at him all the time.

CROW: But then it wouldn't be love.

I was originally with him until he paid me back for a new bike, but now I'm not sure if I would leave if he did."

MIKE: Here's to hoping.

(BOTS look at MIKE)

MIKE: Guys, it was a joke. I'm an Ash and Misty romance fan.

BOTS: Just checking.

Meanwhile, Ash and Brock were done collecting firewood and Brock was cooking,

MIKE: IF YOU SMELL WHAT THE…

CROW: NO!

MIKE: Right.

while Ash, like Misty, is in deep thought.

TOM: And now, another Deep Thought. By Jack Handy.

"Do I love Misty?

ALL: Yes.

She is my best friend and was with me since day one and I have more than enough money to buy her a new bike,

CROW: After you pay the hospital bills for all those times she pulled out the mallet.

so why won't I?"

TOM (Ash): I'm going to Vegas!

Just as soon as Misty appeared, Brock has finished cooking and served them lunch. They didn't have time to enjoy it however…

*BOOOOOM*

…as a smoke bomb was launched and blinded the trio.

"Who?" Misty asked.

CROW (Slappy): The band on stage.

TOM (Skippy): Who?

CROW (Slappy): The name of the band.

TOM (Skippy): Who?

CROW (Slappy): The band.

TOM (Skippy): No.

CROW (Slappy): So who's on stage?

TOM (Skippy): Yes.

CROW (Slappy): Yes is…

MIKE: Knock it off guys.

"Three guesses!" Ash responded.

MIKE (Misty): Can I use a lifeline?

"Prepare for trouble folks!"

"And make it double with some smoke!"

"To protect the world from devastation."

"To unite all people within our nation."

"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"

"To extend our reach to the stars above!"

"Jessie!"

"James!"

"Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light!"

"Surrender now, or prepare to fight!"

"Meeowth! That's right!"

TOM: No wonder coffee shops refuse to hire them.

CROW (Coffee shop owner): Beatniks only!

MIKE (James): But we're twice as weird as they are!

"Forget it, you're not getting Pikachu!" Ash yelled.

CROW: For once, I just want to see Team Rocket finally admit that they can never do it.

TOM: And ruin our pain?

CROW: How selfish of me.

"Oh contraire." James said.

"We have a little gift for you twerps," Jessie said

MIKE: But it's not even Christmas.

CROW: An un-birthday?

TOM: Please, this fic has enough problems, lets not drag classic literature into this.

as a man with brown hair, a brown pants, and a black tee shirt with an unbutton shirt over it.

TOM: What is this? A fanfic or the latest fashion show from Europe?

CROW: Ether way, we're in for pain.

"Meet B.R.I.AN, a new member to help us get our prize."

MIKE (Judge): I'm sorry, but you are disqualified.

"So ya better hand him over now." Meeowth confidently said.

"Or I'll just take him." B.R.I.AN said.

"Not a chance." Ash said.

CROW (Singing): No chance in hell.

"That's right," Misty said. "You'll have to fight all of us if you want to get Pikachu."

TOM (Mills Lane): Ok, lets get it on.

"And that'll be a challenge." Replied a confident Brock.

"Oh, I doubt that rock boy." B.R.I.AN said with confidence. "Give me you best shot!"

TOM (Singing): Hit me with your best shot.

"Chicorita! GO!"

CROW: Away, please.

Ash said as he threw his Pokeball containing the grass Pokemon.

TOM: You know, I saw Chickorita's evolved form, Beyleaf, and those things around her neck.

MIKE: And?

TOM: I can't decide if she supports ether legalization of weed or the tobacco industry.

"CHICA!" ("READY!") The little Pokemon said.

"This little weed?" B.R.I.AN responded.

CROW (Jay): WHERE?! WHERE?!

MIKE: He means Chicorita.

CROW (Jay): Man that sucks. Snooch to the nooch.

"I thought this was going to be a challenge, not a sparing match."

MIKE: No, a challenge would be able to hear "Pika" for thirty minutes without going mad.

"CHICA?! Chica chica!" ("WEED?! Why you…!) Chicorita said, very angry.

CROW: WHOA! You do not want to get a plant angry.

"Chicorita, razor leaf!" Ash ordered the Pokemon.

"Chica chicaorita!" ("My pleasure!")

(MIKE grabs CROW'S beak shut)

Chicorita launched 2 of her razor leafs, but it was to no avail as B.R.I.AN catches them with no effort.

MIKE: Why, it's as much effort as this author put into this story.

"Is that the best you got?" B.R.I.AN asked. "Care to try again?"

ALL: No.

"CHICA CHICA CHICA!" ("YOU'RE GOING DOWN!") She said as she launches another razor leaf.

CROW: What is it about characters fighting an unstoppable foe wanting to try the same failed technique twice?

TOM (Army guy facing Godzilla): Hmmmm… the missile didn't work the first time… maybe this time… LAUNCH MISSILES!

"HEAT WAVE!" B.R.I.AN said,

MIKE: Well, the weatherman called for it.

and a red beam shot out of his eye and burned the razor leaf to ash. "Why don't you use two Pokemon, Pallet boy?" He said. "You might have a better chance. Keyword: MIGHT!"

CROW: At AOL.

"Bulbasaur! Help Chicorita!" Ash yelled as the little Pokemon came out of his ball.

MIKE (Bulbasuar): FIGHT YOUR OWN DAMN BATTLES!

TOM: Now THAT I'd love to see.

CROW: Would make the show more interesting.

"What am I, a weedwhacker?" B.R.I.AN asked.

ALL: Yes.

"Bulbasaur! Chicorita! Vine whip!" Ash ordered both of his Pokemon.

MIKE: But, like the razor leaf, it was to no avail as he just simply grabbed both vines with his hands.

CROW: No way.

TOM: Not a chance.

"Bulba bulbasaur!" "Chica Chicorita!" ("You got it!") They both said in unison as they used there vine whips on B.R.I.AN, but like the razor leaf, it was to no avail as he just simply grabbed both vines with his hands.

ALL: THE HELL?!

MIKE: I was just guessing.

"You had your fun, now it my turn." B.R.I.AN said while still holding on to the vines. "SHOCK TO THE SYSTEM!" He yelled as an electric shock ran through both Pokemon!

"BULLLLBAAAAAAAAAAA!" "CHICAAAAAA! ("OWWWWWWWWWWW!") They both yelled in unison.

CROW: Where's PeTA when you need'em?

MIKE: Ether at a fashion show or trying to bail half their members out of jail.

TOM: You gotta feel sorry for the cop that has to bring them in.

CROW (Cop): Sir, I busted these two for marching on a fashion stage and holding a fur is murder sign.

TOM (Chief): HAHAHAHAHAHA! I mean, good job.

Misty took Togepi and hid her in the bushes. "I think that you should stay here until its safe Togepi." She said.

"Toge toge." ("Ok mommy.")

MIKE: Isn't that cute?

BOTS: No.

"Next." B.R.I.AN said. But just before Ash could call out another Pokemon…

"Arvok! Bind now!" Jessie said as the snake Pokemon wrapped himself around Ash, causing him to pass out.

"ASH!" Misty yelled.

TOM: Wait, Team Rocket, for once, did something that would be considered intelligent and caused the very person that tells his Pokemon to destroy them to pass out?

CROW: Mike, I'm scarred!

MIKE: Just remember guys, it's a fanfic. The only thing that it can hurt is our minds.

BOTS: It's just a fic. It's just a fic. It's just a fic…

"Vulpex! GO!"

TOM: Away, please.

Brock yelled as the fire Pokemon popped out.

CROW: Next to a furry fan.

TOM (Vulpex): Brock, why is this man drooling at me?

"This thing?" B.R.I.AN said. "I wanted to fight, not have a barbecue. This little thing ain't a challenge."

TOM (Sarcastic): Nice to know that our tax dollars towards public education is money well spent.

"VULPEX?! Vul vul vul vul vul vul vulpex!" ("LITTLE?! I'll show you what I can do!") She said.

"Yeah, I called you little." B.R.I.AN said. "Let's see what you got."

MIKE: Nothing much really.

"VULPEX! FIRE SPIN!" Brock ordered.

"VUL VUL VULPEX!" ("YOU GOT IT!")

CROW (Singing): Toyota.

Vulpex shoots out her fire spin and engulfs B.R.I.AN in the flames.

"VULPEX!" ("YES!")

MIKE: But then B.R.I.AN emerges with a quarter of his face gone and in its place was a metallic piece.

CROW: Ok, now THAT can't be right.

"And me without my marshmallows." Both Brock and Vulpex heard from the flames as they saw B.R.I.AN emerge, with a quarter of the right his face gone, and in its place was a metallic piece.

TOM: Mike, are you reading ahead?

MIKE: No. I'm just guessing.

"Looks like my secretes out." B.R.I.AN said.

CROW (Marge): HIDE YOUR SHAME!

"I'm a cyborg. If you're wondering why my clothes and the rest of me isn't burning is because I'm testing a flame-retardant chemical. And apparently it worked.

MIKE: Thankfully too.

But enough about me."

TOM (B.R.I.AN): Lets talk about you.

Then, he took one look at Vulpex and said:

CROW (B.R.I.AN): Renamon's cuter.

MIKE: Crow.

"ICE COLD STARE!" And a blue beam shot right out of his right eye and covered Vulpex with ice.

"One Vulpex flavored Pokesickle. I prefer chocolate myself." He said.

MIKE: Me to.

TOM: Me three.

CROW: I prefer orange sherbet really.

Before Brock could call her back…

TOM: How can he? She's frozen solid.

"Wheezing! Tackle attack!"

And the gaseous Pokemon tackled and knocked Brock out.

"What about you little mermaid?" B.R.I.AN asked Misty.

MIKE (Misty): I do one nice thing for my sisters and dress as a mermaid, and I wind up being known as the mermaid of the group.

BOTS: FANBOY! FANBOY! FANBOY!

But before Misty could do anything, Lickatong used his giant tong to lick Misty.

(MIKE grabs CROW'S beak shut)

"I don't feel too good." She said weakly.

"Of course you don't." Jessie said. "We altered Lickatong here so he can poison humans." Then, Misty passed out.

MIKE: Like the readers.

Just then, Pikachu tried to ambush them, but B.R.I.AN caught him by his tail.

"You want to shock me?" B.R.I.AN asked. "Just try it."

"PIKACHUUUUUUU!" The mouse screamed as he used his power to shock B.R.I.AN, but it had no effect.

"Nice try you little…" But before B.R.I.AN could finish, the screen in his eyes read:

"WARNING! WARNING! CIRCUIT DAMAGE!"

ALL: SHUT DOWN! SHUT DOWN! SHUT DOWN!

As B.R.I.AN saw the warning, his mind flashed images of him being captured, and being operated on, but anything before that, is a blank.

ALL: Dang.

"I… I… I remember…" B.R.I.AN said. "I remember being human!" He then took one look at Team Rocket and their Pokemon that scared them so much, they couldn't move.

"Tell your boss this," he said. "If you or Team Rocket comes anywhere near me, I will destroy them!" He then pointed his palms at TR.

"CHAOTIC MISSLES!"

And little, but powerful missiles shot out of his hands, causing a big explosion.

CROW (Neighbor): KEEP THE EXPLOSIONS DOWN! I'M TRYING TO WATCH MY STORIES!

"WE'RE BLASTING OFF AGAIN!" TR yelled as they were launched into the sky.

TOM: AND DON'T COME BACK THIS TIME!

MIKE: Tom, this is a Pokemon fanfic. Nether the author or the show has the budget to get decent villains.

Then, B.R.I.AN saw 3 fallen bodies, a frozen Pokemon, and Pickachu and a Togepi crying.

CROW (Togepi): WAAAAAAAAAAA! I'M IN A BAD FANFIC! WAAAAAAAAAAA!

TO BE CONTINUED…

MIKE: In Hell.

(ALL exit)

(Door sequence)

(SOL where TOM is just standing there)

MIKE: Hey Tom, why are you standing there?

TOM: Oh, no reason. Just standing here and I… NOW CROW!

MIKE: What?

(A net drops from the sky)

MIKE: Guys what?

CROW: Be quiet, you'll find out.

MIKE: Guys, you don't want to make me into a robot.

CROW: It's a cyborg Mike.

TOM: And why not? Its fun!

MIKE: Its inhumane, its dangerous. I mean, the results are unpredictable, you saw what happened in the fic.

CROW: All the better to do it.

MIKE: Ok, let me put it this way. Do you want me to have any type of weapon that B.R.I.AN had?

BOTS: No.

(CROW cuts the net as commercial sign flashes)

MIKE: Thanks guys. We'll be back.

GYPSY (Off screen): Guys, what do you want me to do with the hacksaw?

CROW: Just throw it away Gypsy.

GYPSY (Off screen): Ok, but I don't think Mike would appreciate the useless perchance from his credit card.

(MIKE looks at the BOTS then taps the light)

(Planet bumper)

(Commercials)