Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ The Curse of the Monkey ❯ Chapter 2

[^_^ I wasn't planning on writing a second part to this... but, due to popular demand, it's BACK!!!!!!! BWA HA HA HA HA!!!!! ^^ I don't own Pocket Monsters, but I REEEEEEEALLY wish I did... it would be more like this. ^^

Oh, and here are some more name translations... I'm using all the American Pokemon names (aside from 'Nyaasu'... MEOWTH just ANNOYS me...), because it would be far too confusing, and I don't know all the Japanese ones myself.

Imite - Duplica

^^ Whee. Read on.]

*

Imite looked at her watch. "Damn," she said. "SNL is on in five minutes."

"I prefer Mad TV," Ditto said from its place on her head.

"Asshole," Imite said, then blinked. "Hey. Yo. I didn't know you could talk..."

"Uh..." Ditto's dot-eye twitched. "DITTO!!"

Imite relaxed in her chair, and turned on the TV. "Oh, okay." She paused. "Was there even a point to this scene?"

"Uh... no."

"Thought so."

*

"Hey!" Kasumi said in an annoyed voice. "When the hell did you start writing this in prose?"

*Since I'm not being a lazy frog,* said the author. *Besides, I prefer prose to script, anyway.*

Kasumi glared at her. "Change it back!"

The author rolled her eyes. *Oh, fine...*

Kasumi: Thank you.

Kojiro: ::scratches his head:: Uh... weren't we, like... doing something, or whatever?

Kasumi: I... think so...

Both pause to consider this.

Nyaasu: ::rolls its eyes:: GOD!!! Have you two actually FORGOTTEN the PLOT?!

Kasumi: What plot?

Kojiro: (sips sake) Mmm... good point...

Nyaasu: ::sighs heavily::

Musashi is currently doing the Fusion Dance (of DBGT fame ::snickers::) with several cute and innocent woodland creatures.

*

Satoshi: ...

Takeshi: ... ::pokes him with a five-foot stick::

Satoshi: ...

Takeshi: ... Weird.

Satoshi: ... Ow.

Takeshi: -________-

Kenji: ::shrieks in Takeshi's ear:: HI, TAKESHI!!!

Takeshi: ::jumps and clutches ears:: SHIT!!!

Kenji: ::stares at him:: What's the matter, Takeshi? ::eyes tear up:: Do you hate me...?

Takeshi: ::winces:: Eh... hate is too strong a word...

Kenji: ::glomps him:: OH, JOY!!!!!

Takeshi: ::face twists:: OW... ::coughs:: ... Uh... Kenji...

Kenji: YES, TAKESHI?!

Takeshi: Satoshi is watching us... can't you see how... uh... heartbroken he looks?

Satoshi: ::picks a flower and sniffs it::

Kenji: ::gasps in a high-pitched voice:: OH, MY GAWD!!! ::dashes over to Satoshi and takes his hand:: CAN YOU EVER FORGIVE ME?!

Takeshi: ::takes a big, obnoxious breath:: AIR...

Crazed Monkey: ::prods him in the head with a sharp stick::

Takeshi: OW!!! WHO THE HELL IS DOING THAT?!

*

Stupid Narrator: How RUDE!! I haven't made an appearance this whole chapter!!

Oakido-sensei: And that's the way it should stay.

Stupid Narrator: Why, Professor Oak! I'm surprised at you! You're a lot more old and crispy than the rest of the cast; you should respect me as an equal!!!

Oakido-sensei: Shut up, whippersnapper.

Shigeru: ::glares over at the Stupid Narrator, and takes a long drag from his cigarette::

Stupid Narrator: ... On second thought, I'll be leaving now.

Oakido-sensei: You're not leaving me with HIM!!

Shigeru: ... Up yours, old man.

Oakido-sensei: ::bristles:: Stop CALLING me that!

Shigeru: ... Fine.

Oakido-sensei: ::blinks:: ... Well, that was easy.

Shigeru: Bitch.

Oakido-sensei: ::sighs heavily:: I knew I should have persuaded his mother to put him in military school...

*

It is night. A long, annoying cry sounds, echoing throughout the forest. Nyaasu is up a tree, with binoculars and a headlight (switched off) attached to its head.

Nyaasu: ::mutters to itself:: Damn... I can't see a thing...

A thirteen-year-old girl with red hair and glasses pops into being next to him. This is the author.

Author: Well... you COULD turn the flashlight on...

Nyaasu: ::protests:: She'd SEE that!

Author: ...

Nyaasu: ... ::apprehensively:: What?

Author: ... Where are Kojiro and Kasumi?

Nyaasu: Do you really care?

Author: Not especially.

Nyaasu: Ah. ::twiddles with its climbing equipment:: ::pauses:: Was there even a point to this scene?

Author: Probably not.

Random Guy in the Audience: ::laughs crazily:: Is there even a point to this whole damn story?

Author: ::throws a shoe at his head:: Shut up, you.

Random Guy in the Audience: Ow. ::dies::

Stupid Narrator: Well, that was certainly violent! I don't think you should have that kind of thing on a children's cartoon show!

Nyaasu: ::stares at him:: What the HELL are you talking about?

Author: ... ::punts the Narrator:: I won't even comment.

Far below them, Musashi pulls out a trombone and starts playing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" on it. This, of course, sounds horrible, as she doesn't know how to play. After completing this, she joins hands with her little woodland friends around a bonfire that magically appears out of nowhere (mostly because I'm too lazy to write in in properly), and they begin to sing "Kumbaya".

*

Takeshi, Satoshi, and Kenji (who, at this point, has gone to bed like a good little boy) are standing around in the woods obliviously. Suddenly, Satoshi seems to come out of his trance.

Satoshi: I have been called by my Master.

Takeshi: ... Uh...

Satoshi: ::grabs Takeshi by his ear and starts to drag him through the random foliage::

Takeshi: OW!!!!! SATOSHI!!!!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! LET GO OF ME!!!!!

Kenji: ... ::snores::

*

Imite: Damn. It's over.

Ditto: Word.

Imite: Shut up, asshole.

Ditto: Okay.

Imite: ...

Ditto: ...

Ditto: Can we watch Mad TV now?

Imite: No.

Ditto: Damn.

*

Nyaasu, Kojiro, and Kasumi have all joined Musashi in singing "Kumbaya". The three of them have fixed smiles on their faces. Musashi is the only one that actually sounds good, because even though she sounds like a zombie, this is STILL Hayashibara Megumi we're talking about.

Kojiro: ::whines under his breath:: How the hell did we get into this...?

Kasumi: ::hisses:: It's your fault!

Kojiro: ... It is?

Kasumi: ... Yes. Yes, it is.

Nyaasu: ACTUALLY, it was that damn girl.

Kojiro: Hmm.

Kasumi: OH, YEAH!!!!

They all glare over their shoulders at the author. She is lounging against a tree, picking her teeth with a random twig.

Author: What?

Musashi: ::drones:: Kuuuumbaaaaaayaaaaaa...

At this point, Satoshi runs out of the woods, dragging Takeshi behind him (who, by this point, has given up, and is face down on the ground). He drops Takeshi in front of Kasumi and Kojiro, then sits next to Musashi.

Satoshi & Musashi: ::in unison:: Kuuuuuummbaaaaayaaaaaa, my Loooooorrd, kuuuuummmbaaaayyaaaaa...

Takeshi: Ow.

Kasumi: ... Uh... you okay, Takeshi?

Takeshi: ...

Kojiro: ::flips him over with a stick and inspects his face:: It looks like his nose is broken.

Nyaasu: Eh.

Kasumi: ... Um... okay...

Takeshi: Ow.

*

Shigeru sits on the couch next to Imite.

Imite: ... ::stares at him::

Shigeru: ... ::stares back at her and takes a long drag from his cigarette::

Imite: ... Wanna watch SNL?

Shigeru: I prefer Mad TV.

Ditto: DUDE!!

Imite: Bitch.

Shigeru: Asshole.

Imite: Bastard.

Shigeru: Bite me.

Imite: ...

Shigeru: ...

Imite: ::throws him the remote:: All yours.

Shigeru: Up yours.

Imite: You're welcome.

*

Stupid Narrator: SO!! We come to the end of the second episode -- which, might I add, I hardly showed up in. What will happen to our friends at the campfire? Why is Gary with Duplica? And where IS Pikachuu?

PallaPalla: ::shoots him with a tranquilizer gun:: Still dead.

Stupid Narrator: ::snores::

PallaPalla: Well, there you go. I might write the next part, I might not. Depends on the feedback. ^_^ Thanks to everyone who reviewed the first time, it means a lot to me. ^^ Ja!

She takes the Stupid Narrator by his ankles and drags him away.