Princess Mononoke Fan Fiction ❯ Princess Mononoke Rebirth ❯ The Failure that was loved ( Chapter 17 )

The Failure that was loved

 

Motoko came running into the house half-crying. Her heart beats thumped faster and faster as she made herself feel ill. Suddenly another voice came into her head.

“You are a failure.”

“Who's that?!” Motoko hurled back.

“Doesn't matter all that does is knowing what a mess you have left behind, such as the murder of your father.” The area around her turned dark and eerie, with a coldness that ran down her pine.

“I didn't mean to kill my father! It was an accident!” Motoko cried out.

“So you say, yet the sin of murder still lingers in your veins.”

“Please, don't do this to me!” She implored.

“The only way you can balance the deed is to take your own life; an eye for an eye, isn't it?” Motoko then gasped as she heard those words go through her ears.

“Are you saying I should kill myself?”

“It's only a suggestion, but it can save you from a lifetime of shame and embarrassment from the world.” Motoko then ran outside into the dusk air; out into a corner where darkness surrounded her, and drew her fingers down her throat and started to choke. Piles of vomit spewed out on the floor, with hints of blood trickling down the side of her mouth as well.

“Suffering eases the guilt, did you say? Well…I must suffer then!” She then ran back into the house and drew out her daggers. She ripped open the cloths that covered her wrists and started to press the blade down onto her veins. She then sliced the wrists as blood dripped onto her kimono.

“Does it feel good?”

“Yes, yes it does.” Motoko replied back to the dark voice. She then placed the blade onto another area on her wrists and opened up more holes as she went along. With every slash she took, she winced at first, but then sadly smiled as she thought that ending her life slowly and painfully would satisfy the debt of her father's death. She then looked over into the corner and saw the sword that took her father's life. She walked up to it at a mere distance and looked bluntly at it. The whispers of this dark cult then became more frequent in her head, as they overlap their words from one another.

“You know you want to end it.”

“What the point of carrying on now?”

“Just do it.”

“End it.”

“You're useless.”

“Do it.”

“Go head, take it,”

“There's no one to love you now.”

“DO IT!”

Motoko then finally gave in; she gripped hold of the dagger and held it to her throat, making the point of the blade to touch her bare skin. Tears poured down from her eyes as she swallowed herself in depression.

“I'm taking it!”

“Stop!” Another firm voice came into the house. Motoko turned round, and saw Sasuke looking at her frantically. He looked down to her bleeding wrists and saw her tainted face. “What are you doing?!” He walked up to her and clutched onto her wrists. Motoko then whined out in pain as she collapsed to the floor, with Sasuke still clinging onto her. “Is this how you want to end your life? In pain?!” he questioned her angrily.

“Let go of me!” Motoko pleaded.

“You didn't answer my question!”

“Let go of me! PLEASE!!” Sasuke then immediately let go of Motoko, leaving her to bleed heavily and cry her eyes out. But then as her face looked at the floor, with her hair covering it, a silence then spread across the room, and Sasuke began to worry.

“Motoko? Motoko wake up.” He then knelt down to her level, brought her body upright, and saw her face unconscious and pale with great loss of blood.

“Motoko! Motoko wake up! Stay with me please!” The voices became a blur to Motoko as her vision started to darken as well, as it then finally went black.

 

There was a lit candle in a corner; the dusk had already grown into late of night. Motoko was found covered in a warm fur blanket, with her wrists covered in bandages, and the color of her peachy skin returned to her face. Her eyes woke up slowly to look up at the ceiling, and gradually looked to her side and saw Sasuke looking down on her.

“I could have lost you.”

“Why do you care Sasuke?”

“Since I joined you humans.” He then knelt down to her level. “Why did you try to commit suicide?”

“Because I'm worthless and not needed.” Sasuke looked at her funnily.

“Now why you think of a stupid thing like that?”

“I lost a fight to Ashitaka in order to avenge my people.”

“Ashitaka is a hard man to beat, why fight against him?”

“His people killed mine, which lead to my father's manslaughter.”

“What about your mother?” Motoko took a long pause.

“She was a liar; she left me and my family to build another. And with me being alone; all I wanted to do is to run away, and realize that I can never get what I want.” Sasuke then took in some sort of sympathy for Motoko. But then in a strange way; he then got closer to her and got up and carefully sat on her pelvis.

“What do you want Motoko?” he asked firmly, yet gently at the same time.

“To find love. Do you think that you could be the one?”

“I don't know if it's lust or not…but I really like you. That's why I couldn't kill you.” Motoko started to breathe heavily, and let Sasuke embrace her wounded wrists as he brought his chest closer to her.

“I don't believe you.” She whispered to him.

“It's true, if you need love why aren't you stopping me?” he whispered back as he brought his lips closer to hers. “Why won't you say…no?” he then touched her lips. Motoko felt the heat of the lips rushing through her mouth, her eyes started to gaze onto Sasuke's cool midnight hair that bounced off reflections of the moonlight. She felt, warm, feverish, and sensitive, her cheeks turned rosy red and her hair flared up a little from this vibe that she was receiving. As she let Sasuke take over her lips, she started to feel confusion from what was happening at that moment. She knew that she was being kissed by a person whom she was trying to kill for some time, which she wished for his death to arrive on his footsteps. On the other hand, she liked it. She liked the endorsing of Sasuke's body heat and soft kiss, no matter how rough the man was in character. And for the first time in her life she felt that she was intimately loved by another being, and more surprising was the one she least expected it to be.

So Motoko let the intimacy continue; she raised her wounded arms around Sasuke's neck and drew him closer to her body. Sasuke let go of Motoko touch for a sensuous breath.

“Is this what you want?” Sasuke hyperventilated sensitively.

“Yes.” Motoko whispered back. They then resumed their sensational liaison between each other, as Sasuke slowly took over Motoko's body. He brushed his fingers through her hair and ran down her neck. He brought his lips down to her nape and pressed on them; letting his warm tongue lick leisurely across to her neck. His hands then stroked down from her chest until it reached one of her breasts. Sasuke paused for a moment and looked down upon it, as so did Motoko, they then looked at each dozily.

“I want you to take me Sasuke.” She breathed to him. Then Sasuke let his tongue latch into her mouth as they exchange their fluids. He gently groped the breast, massaging it delicately as he could. Motoko then breathed out a quiet moan into this heated atmosphere from the sexual contact off Sasuke. He then drew down his hand onto her thigh and stroked it back and forth; Motoko then had the urge to touch him humidly, as she then run her hand down from Sasuke's back and onto his hip. And then, gently, she had then placed the hand lower below his hips. Sasuke gasped for a moment and looked down at her hand. He paused for a moment and then looked at Motoko.

“Maybe we shouldn't do this.”

“What?” she gasped at him.

“Not now.” He then rose off of her and straightened himself out. Motoko tried to get up, but was still too weak due too her lack of blood. “We can't do it. Not in your condition.”

“I'm fine!” Motoko snapped back but then grunted due to the pain in her veins. “I'll see you in the morning.” Sasuke then turned away from her and slowly walked up to the slide. Motoko then slowly rose up and quivered a little.

“So that's it? What was that all about before then? Just a little lust tour of me?!”

“No, what I said is true.” Sasuke replied smoothly. “I'm enamored with you.” He then walked out from the house into the midnight, leaving Motoko to quake emotionally and tearfully.