Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ Ranma and Akane: Woes in Nerima ❯ It was a wednesday ( Chapter 2 )

 

:Disclaimer: All chatacters in the following fiction are the sole property of their respective copy write holders. That may include, but is not limited to Rumiko Takahashi, VIZ studios and filming agents, and that guy that got Mrs. Takahashi's coffee this morning, etc. I'm merely barrowing them, if you think otherwise, you should begin looking for a good psychiatrist.

 

Ranma and Akane: Woes in Nerima.

By, Tuisto.

A story of gratuitous cameos, unusual plots, even weirder martial arts, and utter craziness. Oh, and yes, I AM a sick and twisted person. That said, this story, while taking a lot of elements from the Ranma-verse, is completely AU (that's `Alternate-Universe' folks), and as such, don't try to ponder anything you read here within with ANY sort of an attempt to rationalize or understand it. You'll likely just end up with a headache. Or like me, “sick and twisted”. You've been warned.

 

Now without further, adieu.

 

Woes in Nerima chapter 2: revised

 

 

 

Woes in Nerima, part two, it was a Wednesday.

 

The most dreaded thing to one pigtailed martial artist, aside from demons, ghosts and centuries old perverts. Was school, this day was no exception.

“Ah, Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!” Ranma blurted.

“Um, what is it now Ranma? Forget to do your homework again?” Akane asked as the trio, of two Tendo girls, and the Saotome neo-girl walking through the hallowed halls of Furinkan high school.

“No! I realized it's Wednesday!” Ranma said in a huff as the two girls proceeded to their class room, and Nabiki went off to hers, though thinking that the transmitter `bug' in Ranma's school pack was worth every yen.

“…uh, yeah, so what about it? Akane replied.

“Duh, dummy! We have phys-ed on Wednesdays!” Ranma said exasperatedly.

“Ah-huh, you've lost me, how's this a major problemme worthy of swearing again?” Akane said dryly.

“Right now I'm still a girl! I'll have to go into the girls' locker room and change in there into girls gym clothes, then do the girls type phys-ed!” Ranma protested.

“Gee, lucky you” Akane said dryly.

“Don't you get it Akane!? They all already know I'm really a guy! One foot in there and they'll kill me for being perverted or somethin'!. I wish I had gotten a note from Dr. Tofu this morning or something…..” Ranma said dejectedly.

“Ranma… you perverted? Perish the thought” Akane said sarcastically, though finding something quite humorous in the situation.

“Seriously Akane, I need your help, can you vouch for me or somethin'? I'm beging you!” Ranma pleaded. Then turned on her `I'm the cutest little thing since puppies and bunnies' face complete with her hands under her chin. Usually reserved for scamming free food.

Akane though HAD to wonder were the pink tinged mist, or bouquets of flowers hanging in midair defying the laws of physics had come from… odd…

 

Akane sighs in defeat and says. “Well, I guess I can, and then I can probably convince Nani and Hitomi to vouch for you as well. But don't think for a minute I won't be keeping an eye on you in there!” Akane said.

“Oh thanks Akane you're the best!” Ranma said with a smile so sweet it that could put `widdle'Azusa Shiratori into a diabetic coma, then continued “….But… while you're keeping an eye on me….Uh…. could you also keep an eye on the other girls in there? I really don't wanna get cought up in a fight with half-naked girls in the locker room right now.” Ranma said then mentally added “…or ever for that matter”.

“Uh……, sure!” Akane said a little unsure.

 

 

As the bell tolled signaling Ranma's execution, err gym class. As Ranma approached the lair of femininity, she just had to wonder to herself why she, best martial artist in Japan if not the world, and in inhumanly good physical condition had to go through phys-ed at all.

“Well, here goes nothing” Ranma said boldly as she flung open the girls locker room door and confidently strode in confidently.

That is until she bumped right into the tower of imposing female flesh that blocked her path. Sure, most people tower over Ranma, but outside of martial arts, just going about her business Ranma found this, for a change rather… intimidating.

 

“HEY! You're Ranma Saotome! What are you doing in the girls' locker room you pervert! Why I `ought to kick your ass for coming in here!” Said boldly by Migumi a plain homely girl, one of Nabiki's friends (note `hentchwoman' in the dictionary) and a general school bully.

“In case you hadn't noticed, I'm a girl too you know! I've got the c cups to prove it too, so I have every right to be here!” Ranma said with a confidence that really wasn't there and then a wink.

Migumi a bit taken aback by the forwardness of this… this redheaded bitch, and by the fact this boy turned girl had a better figure than hers shot back. “Why you… you… BAKA! GET OUT! GET OUT OF HERE YOU HENTAI!!!” Migumi shouted, then really roughly shoved Ranma against a locker, raised her voice and shouted in Ranma's face every curse or put-down she knew. Several of which really struck deep in the redhead.

 

Akane hearing the single sided `argument' from all the way out in the gymnasium proper, ran into the lockers and rushed through the mass of girls to where she saw Ranma backed up to a locker being screamed at by no other than Migumi.

“MIGUMI! What do you think you're doing!?” Akane yelled at the older girl.

“This, this baka no hentai Ranma thinks he can come in here just cause he looks like a girl!” retorted Migumi still in a fury.

“Ranma right now is a girl Migumi, now you leave her alone! Go pester someone else!” Akane said hotly.

Seeing the fire building in Akanes eyes, Migumi relented. After all, she was bright enough to know that getting the young Tendo mad at you was detrimental to ones health.

“Okay, for now `shes' allowed in here, but don't think I won't be watching you Ranma Saotome!” Migumi said as she walked back to her locker to finish dressing for class.

 

With the confrontation resolved, though Ranma was thinking to herself “I coulda' handled her, I didn't need the tomboy's help!', Akane spoke loudly to the remaining girls in the lockers.

“NOW EVERYONE! Listen here! For right now and the next few days, Ranma Saotome is a woman, just like every other woman in this room! I don't want to see her have any troubles with any of you! Is that understood!? Plus, even when I'm not around, Nani and Hitomi will also be watching! And if I here of any thing, you'll have to answer to me!” Akane finished with a scowl. Then the crowd of girls backed down and went back to dressing. Knowing that `Akane the man hater' wouldn't be sticking up for Ranma without a GOOD reason.

“Geez Akane, I could've handled it, it's not like I'm an invalid or nothin'.” Ranma said far more meekly than she had wanted.

“Oh yeah, you were handling it real well, when I got here, weren't you? You've still got a few tears on your cheak by the way” Akane said. Then continued “… will you be alright?” she said with concern.

“Uh, yeah I'll be alright, thanks. It's just sometimes right now, it's like my emotions are ridin' a roller coaster. Oh and Akane, for you know what you did there…. and…..” with that Ranma trailed off with a mumbled “thanks”.

Akane just nodded for several minutes after Ranma's description of a “emotional roller coaster, and decided to tread lightly with the neo-girl for next several days.

 

Then Akane noted a NEW look on Ranma, pale, and afraid?

“Ranma, what's wrong now?” Akane sighed. After all, a Ranma with PMS? How much weirder could the world get?

“I just realized, that girl Migumi….. she was topless, and just in lace panties. And I didn't feel a thing.” Ranma said then paled further.

“So? She was topless, we're in the girls' locker room dummy, kind of the thing we do in here” Akane said as she began to undress.

“But Akane!.... I'm a guy, I should've, you know, felt something!” Ranma whispered to Akane.

“Oh Ranma, you're a girl right now, right? Well girls don't feel that way about other girls. (`well that's normally the case anyway' Akane thought) Just leave it at that and don't think about it. I'm sure that once you're a guy again you'll once again get all sorts of perverted thrills” Akane said wryly.

“hardy har har……. Hey watcha doing!?!” Ranma shouted, noting Akane's almost total nakedness in only panties.

“You dummy, getting changed for phys-ed class, which is what you should be doing if we're not going to be late!” retorted Akane. “here are some gym shorts and a shirt I got for you earlier from the school shop.” Akane said throught the attire to the shorted redhead.

“Thanks Akane” Ranma said as she took the clothes then went to a W/C stall.

“What? Can't change clothes in front of me Ranma?” Akane said with a small (ever SO small) smirk.

“Naw, just gotta take care of something.” Ranma said as she closed the door to the W/C.

Now inside the W/C “Well, here goes another first for me. My first whole box of tampons.” With that Ranma removed the plastic wrapping of the box Kasumi had handed her day before yesterday.

 

“Yuk, being a girl really sucks sometimes.” Ranma said with a sour face as she flushed the refuse and stepped out of the W/C in her gym attire. “And could these outfits be anymore revealing?.... Geez, they call me a pervert, they really ought to be beating on the guy that thought it was a good idea for us to wear this get-up.” Ranma grumbled as she left the locker rooms headed for the sporting fields.

 

 

 

“Ranma!”. “Oh Ranma honey! Over here!” Said Akane and Ukyo. Despite common beliefe, the two were in fact friends and not just rivals for a certain you-know-who.

Turning to see who had called her, Ranma saw then walked over to where Akane and Ukyo were waiting for her.

“For a while hon we didn't think you were ever going to come out of there Ranma” Said Ukyo jokingly.

“Hey, Uc-chan. Yeah, kinda had to take care of a personal issue” Ranma said with a near nuclear powered blush.

The two girls noticed and looked at how Ranma the neo-girl was standing.

“Still not used to a tampon are you sugar?” Ukyo piped up.

Ranma shuddered slightly. And just said with more blush than before “No.”

“Well, it'll get easier” Akane said as if trying to reassure Ranma.

“Now come on! Coatch wants us to run laps today. It'll be fun!” Ukyo said trying to keep Ranma from into a funk.

“Well, now that's something I can do with the best of `em!” Ranma said boldy and britened up as if regaining her confidence.

 

 

On the other side of the sports fields sat Kuno, the imperious Blue Thunder of Furinkan High School. His gaze never once leaving his pigtailed girl. “Ranma Saotome” he verbally corrected himself.

“Even with your revelation, I love you dearly still. You move like Diana on the hunt, with gracefulness and joyous beauty abounding. Oh what to do?!” Kuno said quietly to himself.

“Doest mine love for ye Ranma, wither on the vine like so much a sweat ripe grape? Nay, need this not be the case? Surely the scamp loves me dearly. She flees and scorns my advances, to lure me… obviously. YES! Most obviously she's infatuated with me! And yet she is also a he………. My mortal nemesis in taking the hand of Akane Tendo. Non-the-less. A problemme I must remedy.” Kuno paused his long winded diatribe to watch the pigtailed beauty as she sped through the track.

“She is simply magnificent” Kuno said before he was knocked out by a stray football from the football fields.

“Guys, I think we just knocked out Kuno” said the captain of the rugby team.

“Quick! Run before he wakes up!” said the team as they fled back into Furinkan.

Moments later, Kuno arose from his impromptu, cranial trauma induced nap time.

“I have it! As if by devine inspiration by the gods, I have it! I shall use one of my twisted sister Kodachi's potions to get Ranma to marry me! Once married to me she can't not marry the fair Akane, then Akane can be my first concubine!” Kuno cackled maniacally.

Truly, the working mind of a Kuno is really a sight to behold.

 

 

 

“What the heck is wrong with Kuno-honey?” Ukyo said to Ranma as she pointed to the laughing lunatic kendo club captain.

“Knowing him, he's just finished cooking up a crazy sceme to date me or something” Ranma said, adding “I think I'd better keep my distance from him for now.”

“Agreed!” said Akane, Ukyo, Nani, and Hitomi.

“Alright girls! Good practice, especially to Ranma with perfect times. Now hit the showers girls!” bellowed the girls' phys-ed coach.

“Sssshhowers?!” Ranma stuttered out in fear of hot water.

“Yes Ranma, you know, where water cleans off the dirt and sweat?” Akane said plainly. Adding, “Look on the bright side”

“What's that?” Ranma asked quizzically.

“In the showers filled with naked girls, the hot water won't turn you into a guy… so you'll get to continue breathing.” Akane said followed by a laugh.

“You're right, oh I just give up. Let's go to the showers and get it over with.” Ranma grumbled irritatedly.

 

 

 

 

 

“Nabiki, you go on home ahead of us, Ranma, Ukyo and I are going to go do a little after-school shopping” Akane shouted to her older sister.

“Fine, don't have to tell me twice” Nabiki said and continued home to the Tendo residence.

“Okay Ranma-honey, you ready to go shopping as a girl for girl things now?” asked Ukyo.

“As ready as I'll ever be. Just can we please skip things with laces and bows... PLEASE!” Ranma pleaded.

“Oh, I don't know Ranma, you DO look awefully cute in lace and bows!” Akane mocked.

“hardy har har, now lets go or the mall will be closed!” Ranma said, then grabbing the two other girls wrists began walking.

Once in the mall Akane and Ukyo set out their little plan of “Akane and Ukyos: LET'S EMBARRAS RANMA!”

Oddly, Ranma didn't notice the banner that said just as much, or the two girls in question strike dramatic poses.

 

 

The “plan” didn't quite work like the two had expected though.

 

“Ooo, Akane, how does this dress look from behind and does it go with these shoes?” Ranma cooed while trying to see her butt in the three-fold mirror. Not that she was self-concious of how she looked or nothin'. Certainly not that.

Akane nearly having to hold back her laughter, reassuringly said “Yes Ranma the shoes match, and it's very pretty on you too.” Though she did giggle softly.

“Akane, I think we've created a monster” Ukyo said jokingly as she nudged Akane with her elbow, also softly giggling.

“I know, dad's gonna' have a fit when he sees how much we've bough for Ranma.” Akane said as she looked back at all the bags from various stores.

“Okay Ranma, there's one more shop we need you to visit for some much needed necessities.” Akane said with a strait face, but inside was laughing her ass off.

“Oh really, what kind of shop?” Ranma asked with a bright smile. Without the pressure from “Auntie” Saotome to be more womanly, shopping was rather fun, Ranma found out.

“Oh, you'll see sugar when we get there” Ukyo said with a mischievous grin.

 

As the girls approached the shop, Ranma noticed how different it looked compared to all the other shops in the mall. It was a bright pink store front with banners in frilly English script as advertisers.

“Okay, Ranma-honey! We're here!” Ukyo giggled.

“Uh, what's the name of this place again? I've never noticed it here before.”

“Oh, well, it's a pretty new store, it's called Victoria's Secret it's a chain from the United States.” Akane said.

“Oooo, sounds nice and expensive, but um, what is it they sell here?” asked Ranma.

“Lingerie!” Both Akane and Ukyo beamed.

“NO! Absolutely not, no way, no how! I ain't buyin' no frilly girls lingerie!” was Ranma's defiant protest.

“Look here Ranma, ever since you came to live with us, you've been borrowing mine and my sisters lingerie when in your girl form. Now lingerie in a personal thing, and we're all tired of you needing to borrow it so often. So we're going to take you in there, and you're going to buy some things of your own. Understand?” Akana said firmly.

“Alright, but I'm not liking this!” Ranma said in defeat.

“You'll change your mind afterward Ranma-honey.” Ukyo said with a wink.

 

 

 

Once in the shop Akane and Ukyo `convinced', that is dragged Ranma up to the nearest sales lady.

“Hello! Welcome to Victoria's Secret, is there anything I can help you ladies find today?” said the busty middle-aged, but still quite attractive, conservatively dressed saleswoman from behind a rack of lace nightgowns noticing the three school girls that has just stepped in.

“Hi-ya! Our friend here was raised by her dead-beat father and has no nice lingerie, so we need to get her the full works if we can!” Ukyo beamed.

“Plus what-ever else you can think she might need, too!” Akane added, then smirked at the now blushing Ranma who all she could do was look at the floor.

“Miss, what's your name?” asked the saleswoman, who by now was standing next to Ranma.

“My name? I'm Ranma.” She said, still looking at the floor.

“Never done this before have you?” asked the saleswoman.

“Uh… nope, it's all too weird.” Ranma replied.

“It'll get better sweetie, now look at me, we're going to get you measured up now. Okay?” said the saleswoman with a smile.

“Okay” Ranma said.

With that the saleswoman took Ranma into the back fitting room.

“Now hold still while I take your measures…” after several minutes of fumbling with the tape measurer the sales-lady exclaimed in surprise “... Oh my, 36-28-30, you're quite a curvy girl for your height and age.” said the saleswoman.

The saleswoman noticing Ranmas cheaks were almost as red as her hair decided to try and ease the girl by changing the subject as she went about selecting items.

“I really like your red hair, it's a very good dye job. Where do you get it done?”

“Huh, my hair?” asked Ranma a little thrown off by the question.

“It's natural, I don't dye it, and Akane's big sister Kasumi is the one that cuts it. Why do you ask?” Ranma said.

“Oh, no reason I guess. But you say you're a natural redhead?” asked the saleswoman

“Yes.” Ranma said unsure of why this woman found her hai so interesting. After all it's just hair.

“So you're not entirely Japanese I take it?” the saleswoman said while holding various articles up to ranma to check for fit.

“Naw, I'm all Japanese. My, err, um mom has slightly red hair, but not as red as mine though. In fact pops and mom are so Japanese that when pops took me on a training journey, mom had him sign a seppuku packt.” Ranma said slightly unnerved that she divulged that to a stranger.

“Oh, my, a seppuku packt you say? How old fashioned and romantic. And um, what kind of training did your father take you on, if you don't mind my asking?” the saleswoman said as she began to do some final fittings on a brassier.

“Oh, my training? When I was 6 he took me on a 10 year training mission through all the orient to learn our families' school of Anything Goes martial arts so I can carry it on.” Ranma said, now more comfortable hardly blushing at all.

“So you're a real martial artist? I think I'll get some other things for you for that that'll give you more support. So are you any good?” asked the saleswoman.

“Well, I've never lost a fight, even with the masters of some of the strangest martial arts schools you could imagine. Plus I can beat up the old man!” Ranma said now actually smilling for the saleswoman. Of course Ranma left out the epic fights with Taro, Toma and Herb.

“I'm glad to hear that, sounds like your father deserves it too!” with that Ranma and the saleswoman laughed.

“Well, you're all done Ranma. You're now completely stocked with all the essentials, like brassieres, panties, a few slips, stocking-hose, garters, and for your art, sports bras. Now here's my card, if there's anything else you ever need, like if you meet a boyfriend and want things for the thrill. Don't hesitate to give me a call. Okay?” the saleswoman said with a wink and a grin, once again putting ranma's cheaks into full red blush.

Ranma glances at the name on the card.

“Thanks Mrs. Fujiko LupinIII!, this has been better than I thought.” With that Ranma gently hugged the Mrs. Fujiko.

 

 

 

Just as Ranma left the fitting area and as Mrs. Fujiko was picking-up. A green-haired women walked in from around the corner.

Fujiko “EEPED!” as she was startled and said still rattled “SETSUNA! Don't do that! You scared me!”

Setsuna waved her hands and said “Sorry, sorry, didn't mean to, it's just a… habit I have.”

Fujiko all but glared at her green-haired friend then said “So you always say, so what brings you in today? Looking for something special for some one?” Fujiko finished with a suggestive smirk.

“No, today I'm just…. Looking about. Oh and say… did I hear you call that girl `Ranma'.” Setsuna asked.

“Hmm, oh yeah, nice girl if a bit shy. Why do you ask?” was Fujiko's reply.

“Oh, no reason I guess.” Setsuna said with a smirk, bordering on a smile.

And anyone that KNEW the Senshi of Pluto would've probably decided to vacate the area… immediately. post haste.

Though she thought to herself `hmm, she was here, good it's all coming together. Now it's `her' turn.'

Again, had any one that knew Sailor Pluto been around to see her giggling, they would've known true fear.

 

 

 

 

“So Ranma, what all did you get?” asked Akane as she walked up to where Ranma had exited the fitting room.

“The full works!” Ranma beamed, then pulled out and held up a bright purple lace brassier.

“Akane, is this still the same Ranma?” Ukyo whispered to Akane.

“I have no idea Ukyo, I wonder what that saleswoman said to her in there.” Akane wipsered back to Ukyo, both noticing the big smile on the redheaded girl's face that stood right in front of them.

 

“What are you two looking at? Do I have something on my face?” asked Ranma.

“Oh, us? Nothing, really Ranma, like we'd really be looking at something.” Akane said lamely.

Ranma a little perplexed by Akane's answer just shrugged it off as another “Akane moment”.

“Say, look at the time, we'd all be getting back, it's pretty late” stated Ranma.

“EEEEEKKKKK! It's 9:30, on a school night, and I still haven't gotten home to do my homework! See you two tomorrow in class!” said Ukyo as she bolted off to home/shop.

“Well we'd probably start back now too before dad and Mr. Saotome freak out.” Akane said.

“Yeah, you're right, but we just lost a bag carrier, how are we going to get all this junk back home?” Ranma asked Akane.

“WE? WE aren't going to carry it all home. Ranma, YOU'RE going to carry it all home.” Akane said back to Ranma.

“AH MAN!” was Ranma's protest.

“You wish!” Akane said with a laugh.

“Cute, real cute Akane.” Was Ranmas retorte.

 

 

 

Later that evening Nerima was filled with the sound of a demon-head Mr. Tendo admonishing Akane and Ranma for staying out so late….. until he learned that they'd only spent a nice night out shopping. Then “fountain-san” wailed about how the two schools would soon be joined!

All was right in Nerima…. Sadly it wouldn't last.

 

 

 

 

T/B/C!