Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction ❯ Embers of the Heart: ❯ chapter 03 – Waters Lily ( Chapter 3 )

Embers of the Heart:

chapter 03 - Waters Lily

 

 

“What are you doing?” Seiji asked as he got closer to him.

 

Shin bit his lip and pushed some strands of hair out of his face leaving a pink streak across his forehead. “Cleaning… “He answered honestly.

 

Realizing what he was cleaning up he went over to him. And started looking for where it had come from. “Where is it?” He asked as he pulled his shirt up. “Where is it, Shin?” Seiji said as he grabbed the upper part of his sore arm.

 

Shin whimpered and tried to pull away. Seiji took his shirt and pulled the sleeve up. “What… have you been doing?” He said as he examined the long line. When Shin couldn't pull away he looked to the floor. “Look how red this is.” Seiji looked at him. “Do you even realize what you did?” Seiji let go of his arm and pulled his chin up to look at him. “Do you?”

 

Seiji pulled him up and dragged him to the bathroom where he started to flush it out. Ignoring the whimpers and struggles as he took care of it. Shin was in tears by the time he was done making sure it was cleaned out. And with out letting him go he found the first aid kit in the cabinet and started to wrap his arm with it.

 

“Now don't touch this.” Seiji said sternly as he finished it off with tape. Shin stood there with tears.

 

Seiji looked at him a bit. “It only hurts for a little while.” And he wasn't sure what he said but Shin broke down and started crying as he hung onto the sink. A part of him wanted to walk away and leave him there. But he knew he couldn't do it. “Why are you crying?” He asked curiously as he put his hand on his back and he could feel him shaking slightly. “Come on… “Seiji said softly as he peeled him away from the sink and brought him back to his bed.

 

Seiji found a clean loose shirt and brought it over to him. “Here, change into this. That one's filthy. “He said as he handed it to him Shin did as he was told still sniffling. “You'll feel better with a little rest.” Seiji added as he tossed the dirty one next to the mess on the window sill after wiping off Shin's face with it.

 

Seiji saw the blanket on the floor and added. “This needs to be washed as well. I'll get you one of mine for now.” He said as he brought the dirty clothes with him. He got them started in the wash and went to his room gathering up his blanket for him. Returning to him he sprawled it across him and closed the blinds for him.

 

He could still tell he was crying even though it was quieter. So he sat next to him. “You'll never tell us what happened will you?” Seiji said as he laid a hand on his side. He didn't expect an answer as the room stayed quiet. The blond sighed to himself. “What am I going to do with you? At this rate I know you're not going to perform as a Trooper. I don't want that, do you?... If any of them knew what you did to me… “Seiji said in a concerned manner.

 

“Are you going to tell them?” Shin asked turning to look at him.

 

Seiji looked down at the broken form. “Why would I do that? I can't tell them about you with out revealing how weak I was.” Seiji said trying to keep his tone soft.

 

Shin held a look of understanding and asked. “Can you… ever forgive me?”

 

Seiji examined him closely. “Honestly, Shin…. “He hesitated a moment. “I have dreamed of you doing what you did but… don't you ever do it with out my permission again. Got it? You didn't leave me any kind of dignity.”

 

Shin nodded a bit. “Does this mean you're going to leave?”

 

“What?” He asked a bit confused.

 

Shin sat up. “You can't erase it. It's a sick feeling you carry with you and the only thing you can do to make it feel better. Is to leave it behind which usually includes every thing associated with it. Well… it helps but its still there. Is that what you're going to do? Leave me.”

 

“What are you talking about? I never leave anything or anyone.” Seiji assured and growing concerned. “You know if you won't tell me. Maybe I should talk to Naaza.” Seiji said and was a little taken back by a small laugh from the red head. “What's so funny about that?”

 

Shin tried not to smile. “He's kind of hard to get a hold of.”

 

Seiji nodded. “I know he is. Well maybe we can leave a message and he can get to us when he can.”

 

Shin almost busted out in a full laugh. “Leave him a message… “He said with a smile. “I don't know about you Seiji but I wouldn't hold my breath on that one.”

 

Seiji was a little annoyed now. “You're not being very helpful. You have been with him you should know the best way to reach him. If not, what about Rajura? He should know something.”

 

Shin quieted down and looked at the bed. Seiji looked at him starting to get the feeling that something was seriously wrong. “Where is he?”

 

“Who?” Shin asked.

 

“Either one of them.”

 

Shin shrugged. “Could be any where and I never knew where Rajura most of the time.”

 

“What about Anubis?”

 

Shin bit his lip a bit. “… He's usually there. There's no need to really bother him is there?” Shin said playing with the edge of the blanket.

 

“You're not telling me anything. I know something happened because you're not yourself. It's easier to deal with things when you understand why. You attacked Touma and me, why? You're a mess look at your arm. You're distant one minute, crying the next and then a whirl wind of something else. I just want to help you.”

 

“The situation has already been taken care of though.”

 

“What situation?”

 

“The one I needed help with. Anubis and Rajura helped me. It's under control and they told me to forget about it, go home. So I am here. What I need help with is… just being held. That's all I wanted… but no. He just kept pushing. I-I just hated him.” Shin said with a scowl.

 

Seiji watched him intently as he continued. “He was my teacher. Appointed by my best friends, how could I disobey him...? In the end I did anyway.”

 

“Shin, obviously what ever you did, is fine. Rajura and Anubis wouldn't send you home if it were a real problem. And if he did do something he shouldn't have it was okay to disobey him. We would never, ever want you to stay there under unhappy circumstances.”

 

Shin looked set at ease a bit.

 

Seiji decided to take a chance as he moved and sat behind him. He held him gently slightly petting him in silence. Shin instinctively clung to him with out protest. The blonde had gotten more out of him than he thought he would and didn't want to keep prodding.

 

Seiji held him until he fell asleep himself. When he woke up he found his neck stiff. He looked around and noticed it was well into the middle of the night. He shifted under Shin's sleeping form trying to get more comfortable. And with hearing a soft sigh he knew had waken him up. Seiji let his fingers lightly caress his back.

 

In a quiet voice Shin asked. “Need to get up?”

 

“No, I just needed to move a little.” Seiji said pulling the blanket up more for the both of them.

 

Shin snuggled into him a bit more and left an innocent kiss on his shoulder. Seiji closed his eyes as he relaxed enjoying his friends' closeness and heat. And he was well on his way to sleep when Shin spoke again.

 

“Seiji… “He whispered softly into his ear.

 

“Hmm… “He asked half gone.

 

“Can I have my kiss goodnight?”

 

Seiji nodded not really there. “Sure, what ever you want.”

 

Shin gently kissed his jaw making a moist trail to his lips. Lightly tasting, teasing them to let him in. Seiji found himself waking up returning the kiss. The blond slid his hands across his back and pulled him tighter with a slight whimper. Shin slowly deepened the kiss as he slid a hand to his thigh and carefully caressed it. Seiji moaned faintly into the kiss at the feathery touch.

 

Shin pulled away after a few moments with a little taste of his lip. The red head looked him over and nuzzled him a little. Seiji calmed himself and held him gently.

 

“Seiji… “

“Hmm….”

 

“Do you love me? Not like a friend or comrade.”

 

Seiji didn't answer right away. “Yes… “

 

Shin watched him closely. “Would you still love me if I were used up and broken?”

 

Now he was awake. “Of course, you don't just stop loving some one. Why?”

 

Shin kissed his neck softly. “What if I was cold blooded?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Did something with out conscious.”

 

Seiji reached over and turned the light on to see him better. And he was waiting for an answer.

 

“What kind of question is that?” Seiji asked.

 

“Just answer please… “

 

“I would probably still love you but it doesn't mean I would approve of the action. “ Seiji said and let there be a long pause. He could tell he was being gauged.

 

Shin smiled softly at him. “I love you to.” He said as he leaned in and kissed his neck and slid a hand up his shirt where he started to tickle him. Seiji couldn't hold back the laughs as he tried to squirm out of his reach- failing. And just before he could escape off of the bed Shin pulled him back. This last time he had hooked his legs around his hips pinning him on his stomach.

 

When he could tell the blond was getting exhausted he stopped and softly nibbled on the back of his neck. He carefully tasted him letting a free hand pet through golden hair. Sure he was fully relaxed he nuzzled his earlobe slightly and whispered to him. “Are you certain you want to know about Naaza?”

 

Seiji swallowed a little dryly and nodded a bit. Shin ran his fingers through his hair and kissed his ear like a gentle wind. “He's dead.”

 

Seiji's blood ran cold as Shin traced his fingertips along the middle of his back. Tentatively: following it up to the outer curve of his shoulder. The red head leaned in and nonchalantly kissed at the nape of his neck letting an icy snigger escape with it.

 

Seiji tried to get up but was quickly jerked back to the covers. “Shhh…” Shin cooed lovingly. “I am not done.” He added shifting his body against his and letting his hips massage gravely. Unable to do anything else Seiji clutched at the covers. Shin let a strained moan out almost as if pouting and rested his head on his shoulder a moment. “It was a lot like this.” He spoke softly.

 

“It was cold and he was warm under my hands.” He continued to say as he let his palm outline his love's side. “He was exhausted - wasted from using me and his touches were so diseased.” Shin said softly as he played in his hair. “Every time was darkness and so cold. It was going to be the last time he sent me there. “Shin said as his fingertips made small circles on his back laying quiet for a long pause. The blonde could feel his heart beating through the silence.

 

Shin snaked his hand up the nape of gold. “I held him like this… “He said as he grabbed a handful of hair tightly. “And… gave him a soft kiss.” Shin said as he pulled him back a little and tenderly captured nervous lips. And after breaking the kiss he nuzzled at his ear with a whisper. “Then slit his throat.” He said releasing his grip on him.

 

“I remember feeling a rush of freedom: watching everything turn shades of red and black. The next thing I knew Rajura was there.” Shin said sitting up. “He never left my side from that moment on.”

 

Seiji watched him and slowly sat up. “And, Anubis?” Seiji asked carefully.

 

“It was his idea to take care of the mess I made. I don't know what he did with the body, but I watched him burn the bedding.” Shin looked at him. “Y-you seem upset.” He said with tears escaping. “Have you changed your mind about me?” He asked pretending they weren't there.

 

Seiji sat there for a moment watching him. He knew what ever innocence was left hidden behind those emerald eyes. It was only a small glimmer like a simmering ember. And he realized not everything beautiful is fragile, but usually more dangerous and turbulent than they first appear.

 

Shin's love was like a tide pulling him out to sea: some times gently, sometimes violently. But always - simply and completely. Here he could always find warmth in embers of his heart. He knew with enough time and care. The warmth of the heat could come back and save them all.

 

 

 

 

End…