Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction ❯ Koi wa Kurushimi ❯ And I have known the eyes already, known them all--- ( Chapter 10 )

Koi wa Kurushimi
By Djinn Hashiba-Maxwell

And indeed there will be a time
To wonder, "Do I dare?" and, "Do I dare?" --
Time to turn back and descend the stair

- The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
- T.S. Eliot

* * *

The first thing Seiji noticed, upon regaining consciousness, was that the side of his face hurt. It was a dull burning sensation, joined by a dull ache in his jaw as he became more lucid. Eyes still closed, he reached one hand up to finger his wounded cheek, and was mildly startled when the hand was slapped away.

"No touchie." A cheerful tenor chastised.

Seiji blearily opened one sleep-clouded eye to see an indistinct blur of blue and tan over him. He tried to open his mouth to speak, but found it more difficult than he had anticipated. The tenor voice seemed to notice his confusion, and explained.

"We wrapped your head in a bandage to keep your jaw still. You dislocated it when you fell." The voice explained, and then there were careful hands at his back, helping him to sit up. "You tore up your face pretty badly, but most of the cuts were superficial, so the scarring shouldn't be that bad."

Seiji blinked, trying to clear his vision. He had no real idea where he was, or how he had gotten there. The only thing he remembered was some strange person catching him, and then nothing. Whoever found him must have brought him here.

"We'll take the bandage off in a couple of days." The tenor voice continued. "Until then, you should try not to move your jaw too much." The voice sounded wickedly amused as it spoke the next. "Looks like it'll be nothing but liquids for you for a while, Date-san!"

Seiji started at the sound of his own name. He was known here?

And then finally the colors before him resolved themselves into some semblance of order, and Seiji saw a pair of wide indigo eyes regarding him curiously. "Everything feel like it's working all right?" He asked evenly, not sounding at all like he cared that he was speaking to the man who had discovered his identity and tried (admittedly without success) to incarcerate him. Seiji started to speak, but the other cut him off. "Just nod yes or no, please. No sense in fucking up your jaw any worse than it already is."

Seiji nodded.

"Good. Do you know where you are?"

Seiji shook his head.

"Army encampment, near the Gifu convent. I found you out in the middle of the woods. When you jaw is better, you're going to have to tell me what you were doing out there, Date-san." Touma responded. He sat back on his heels and offered an easy smile. "Well anyway, Shuu-san has been gracious enough to offer the services of the army doctor, and indicated that you are welcome to travel to Kyoto with us." A pause. "Unless you'd want to return Takayama? Although I don't see why, since Mikitsuna's dead ... and before you ask no, I did not kill her! Although ..." his glare was challenging, "that doesn't mean I wouldn't have! Anubisu just got to her first."

That said, Touma stood and stretched.

"So anyway ... want a tour of the place? It's not exciting, but you've been out for almost twenty-four hours, so I'm sure you could stand to stretch your muscles a bit."

Seiji nodded to the offer and struggled to get his legs under him. He was feeling a bit hazy, in the back of his mind he realized that he must have been given opium to help him sleep. That would explain his foggy thought processes, at least.

With a laugh, Touma slid hands under the blonde's arms and helped him to his feet, hands sliding down Seiji's sides almost unconsciously as the blonde gained his feet. Seiji shivered, and hated that he did. Touma just smiled and chuckled slightly, before releasing the other man and gesturing for him to follow.

* * *

"Rowan-kun!"

Touma turned and waved slightly to Shuu, who was talking to one of his captains. Shuu bowed out of the conversation and came to join them when he saw that Touma was not alone.

"So, I see our guest has awoken." Shuu addressed this to Touma. Then, to Seiji, "How are you feeling?"

Seiji answered with a non-committal shrug that gave the basic indication of 'fine'.

"Good, good. Rowan, I was wondering if you've seen your friend Ryo? I think he went back to the convent. I sincerely hope he's not bothering Sister Mary ..."

Touma shrugged. "Why would he?"

Shuu gave him a look.

"Oh right." Touma laughed, scratching the back of his head. "That."

* * *

"Yes well." The nun frowned disapprovingly. "I appreciate your sentiment, Sanada-san. Now, if you would leave ..."

"Shizuru-san, onegai shimasu ..." Ryo was forced to address Touma's sister by her first name, since he did not know what her real last name was. He knew, now, that it was not Hashiba, but that was the extent of his knowledge.

"Sanada-san." The nun interrupted. "I appreciate your apology, and naturally I forgive you. I am a Christian after all, and Our Lord teaches forgiveness for the penitent. But I really think that your presence here is not the best of ideas." She began to head for the door. "So Sanada-san, if you please ..."

"Shizuru-san." Ryo was not pleading anymore, his voice was grave. "You must speak with Touma. This is ridiculous, you don't know ... the way he's been behaving." Ryo stopped himself before actually describing the reckless and promiscuous behavior Touma had been engaging in more often of late. He did not think it fit for the ears of a young nun. "He will get himself killed!"

The girl's cool grey eyes leveled on Ryo with a single raised eyebrow - an expression Touma had used on him more time than he could count. "Sanada-san, what on earth makes you think that Touma will listen to me, when he won't listen to you?"

Ryo paused at that, mouth open as if to respond, before he snapped it shut without thinking. He couldn't exactly put his finger on it ... maybe it was the expression on Touma's face when he left the convent, maybe it was the gentle reverence in Touma's voice when he spoke about her, but somehow, Ryo knew that Shizuru's opinions mattered to Touma, perhaps more than anyone else's. "I don't know why, Shizuru-san. But!" He exclaimed as she turned, "I know he would listen to you! He might not like it, he might pretend that he doesn't care, but he does care! He spared you life ... that's more than most people could say." The nun seemed to consider this.

"Sanada-san ..." Ryo looked hopeful, "I cannot. I simply cannot. What you say might be true - I will not say that it is not. But Touma does not want to listen to me, and I do not want to force him. I was bad enough that I had to pen that letter to him ... I cannot stand it when he is mad at me, I see him so little as it is."

"Shizuru-san ..."

"That is enough!" There was a hardness to her voice suddenly, one that reminded Ryo entirely too much of the tone Touma took right before you found his wakizashi firmly embedded in your throat. "Please leave now, Sanada-san. It is nearly time for vespers."

Ryo hesitated, as if he wished to say more, but at long last he nodded, eyes tired. "You cannot blame a man for trying." He commented sadly.

Shizuru smiled, somehow equally sad. "You will take better care of my brother than I ever would, I am sure."

* * *

"Are you feeling all right, Date-san?" Touma asked as Seiji's step faltered, not for the first time. "Would you like to sit down?"

Seiji shook his head emphatically, even though his leg was sore. He seemed to have jarred his knee as well when he fell, now the walking was making it ache in protest, but Seiji was determined to persevere.

Touma, as if reading his thoughts, chuckled. "Determined to be a martyr, Date-san?" He asked lightly, moving slightly so that Seiji could lean on him without being conspicuous - Touma assumed, and quite rightly, that Seiji's pride would not allow him to openly accept assistance. Seiji's hand gripped the sleeve of his kimono, but Seiji stumbled on with no further assistance.

"So," Touma began, "we heard news from Takayama while you were unconscious. I laughed for a good ten minutes when I heard it." He grinned at the blonde. "The good wife of Aito-kyo is pregnant!" Touma chuckled even now, smirking. "After everything they - you - went through to protect Mikitsuna, thinking she would be the only heir, Lady Nanasuki is going to have another child." Seiji had to admit, if only to himself, that that was rather ironic. "And what's more, Aito-kyo himself is recovering from his illness! Looks like having an heir isn't as important as he thought it was.

Seiji nodded in response, concentrating very hard on putting one foot in front of the other. Damn them for giving him opium! He had no tolerance, and his mind was still horribly muddled by it.

"I think you've had enough exercise for one day. You are still injured after all." Touma turned them back to the medical tent. "When the doctor says you don't have to stay the night in the infirmary anymore, you can share my tent if you like. " The offer was said conversationally, without any innuendo, which mildly surprised the blonde. He had to start remembering that the boy he knew as Rowan didn't exist, and the little he had seen of Touma was Touma trying to get something he wanted. Now, he no longer had anything Touma wanted.

Why did that thought sadden him?

"Rowan!!" Someone called, and Touma stopped and turned, smiling when he recognized the black-haired figure approaching. He didn't go to meet him, however - simply continued leading Seiji back to the infirmary.

Touma helped him down onto to the futon, hands gentle at Seiji's hips. "You should get some sleep. If you stay awake, you're just going to start realizing how badly you're hurt."

Seiji nodded; he did feel strangely tired. Touma smiled slightly as he retrieved a thin blanket for the elder boy - he had to admit that Seiji's company was actually quite pleasant under these relaxed circumstances. Especially when he couldn't speak.

"Have a pleasant rest, Date-san."

* * *

"Aren't you going to ask how he is?"

Touma had left through the back of tent, just so he could sneak up on Ryo, who was leaning in through the front flap, looking for him. The black haired boy jumped in surprise.

"Touma, I saw something strange on my way back here." Ryo said quickly.

"On your way back from the nunnery?" Touma responded, his voice ice. Ryo fidgeted, giving Touma his answer. "Ryo, what were you doing at the convent?"

Fidget. Nervous glance. "Nothing ..."

"Ryo, why were you going to see Sister Mary?"

Cough. Hopeful smile. "I wanted to apologize to her."

Touma mulled over that for a second. "Did you?"

"Hai."

Ryo was infinitely relieved when Touma smiled. "All right." The blue-haired boy turned back towards his tent. "What did you see on the way here?"

"Tracks." Ryo replied succinctly. "From a small horse, unshod, so it couldn't have been one from the camp. Rather fresh too, not more than a couple hours old."

"Hmm." Was Touma's response. "Interesting. Where were they headed?"

"Not sure. But wherever it was, it was in a quite a hurry." Ryo grabbed Touma's sleeve. "Touma, who would be riding around the woods in the middle of nowhere on an unshod pony? And what's more, how did a man who was, last time we saw him, guarding a preteen in Takayama end up on the border of Gifu? These things are not unrelated ... "

"I never," Touma said evenly, "implied they were."

"Then what ... !"

"There is, however," Touma continued, "nothing to be done about it until Akuko reveals itself. The first person to become impatient in a fight invariably looses. And I do not intend to lose."

* * *

"I saw you." Kayura growled. "You were talking to Hashiba's fuck toy. I'm asking you how you know him!!" The grip she had on the woman's throat, however, prevented her from issuing any sort of coherent response. "Who are you to them? Are you his lover? A contact? What??"

"Kayura-sama." Naaza murmured humbly. "If you would release her, perhaps she would be more able to respond."

The violet haired girl bared her teeth at the much older man, but relaxed her grip, just slightly. "Well, girl? I'm waiting!"

The silver-blue haired nun coughed a few times, and wiped her mouth, before knocking Kayura's hand away from her throat. "Don't call me girl! I'm older than you are, after all!" She growled.

"When I want your opinion ..." A smirk, "... I'll beat it out of you." Then she delivered a hard box to the side of her head. "Now tell me! How do you know Touma?!"

She spat. "Who the hell is Touma?! I know no one by that name!"

"And the black-haired man who visited with you?!" Kayura demanded.

"A man who wronged me once. Nothing more. He wished to apologize." Shizuru spat back.

Kayura back-handed her.

"I lose my patience with you, Sister. Do you want me to send you the way of your Mother Superior?" The girl demanded, unsheathing one sai to hold the still-bloodied blade very near to Shizuru's throat.

The nun raised her chin. "If my Lord deems fit, he will save me. And if not, he will welcome me into his arms when I leave this world."

"Step down from the pulpit, Sister. There is nothing after this world. When this blade enters your flesh ..." She snapped her fingers. "Instant oblivion."

A look of genuine sympathy crossed the nun's eyes, taking the young girl aback. "You really believe that? Oh, child ... I pray for you."

"Save your prayers." Kayura hissed. "They will do neither of us any good."

Blood splattered over the violet-haired girl's cheeks as the silvered blade sunk deep into the pale flesh, dying silver-blue hair a dull navy. Silver eyes went wide, a choked noise came from a throat no longer capable of speech. Kayura raised one elegantly curved eyebrow, then slid the blade out with a sickening slurping noise, pushing the girl away from her with her free hand.

"Find the rest of the women. Put them where there are no windows, and lock them in." She said to Naaza and Rajura as she brushed past them.

It took only a quarter of an hour for the two men to obey their young leader's request. When they came out, they found the girl already mounted, hands holding tight to the reigns. "What now, my lady?" Naaza asked humbly.

Kayura's eyes flashed.

"Burn it."

The two men bowed and obeyed.

* * *

Kaiya: Oh man. How could Djinn do that? Just kill off her own original character. Authors almost never kill off original characters!

Nai: Well, you know that Djinn doesn't follow trends. That might very well be why she did it. And besides, all Shizuru really did was provide a device to explain Touma's past and prove he had compassion. She'd served her purpose.

Kaiya: But she was such and interesting character! And I thought there was some sexual tension between her and Shuu!

Nai: She was a NUN! And besides, you HATE hetero pairings! Of all the people in the fic, I would have thought you'd want her to fuck Kayura!

Kaiya: Oh that is ridicu ... *pictures it* Hmm ... actually ...

Nai: You have to get rid of functionless characters, Kaiya. That's all there is to it.

Kaiya: Uhm, Nai-koi? Heh-heh ... what's our function?

Nai: What a stupid question! We are ... ehm ... that is to say, we ... oh ... I, er ...

Kaiya: OH MY HOLY GOD! Djinn is going to kill us off too!

Nai: No! She can't! It's impossible!

Kaiya: Why?? She did it to Shizuru!

Nai: But I have something Shizuru didn't!

Kaiya: ... what?

Nai: I'm partially modeled after Djinn's girlfriend! Djinn could never kill someone who reminded her of he g/f! We're saved!

Kaiya: Well ... you are, at least.