Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction ❯ Compliance ❯ Confession ( Chapter 4 )

Rurouni Kenshin Fanfic

Rurouni Kenshin & Samurai X Original Japanese Version (c) N.Watsuki/Shueisha * Fuji-TV * SME Visual Works Inc. * Sony Pictures Entertainment

All Fanfics created by Chiruken (me) were written for the sole purpose of shared entertainment and not intended for publication or sale.


Compliance
by: Chiruken
Confession

He knelt with painful stiffness on the rough tatami floor, head bowed, eyes fixed upon the pattern of straw, hands clenched into fists on his thighs. It was warm in the room and he felt the discomfort deeply, but he made no outward appearance of this. Beside him rested his katana, innocently sheathed within its dark saya, the deadly blade tucked away. His wakizashi was in his room, resting against the wall where he'd left it when he'd received the message that his presence was required. He felt a twinge of fear that he would, once again, be ordered to kill, but if that were the case, why hadn't he been sent the usual black envelope?

His legs were numbing from the awkward position he held. He wiggled his toes to keep the blood flowing, to prevent the painful stinging needle-like tingles that were sure to come from the lack of blood flow. His palms sweated within the tight fists as he felt his unease grow. The silence was stretching into an eternity, the only sound in the small, barely lit room the ticking of the clock set to the side in a small alcove. He watched, from the corner of his eye, the single flame of the candle flickering in a draft, casting eerie shadows on the walls. And still the silence reigned supreme.

He tensed when the other man cleared his throat, feeling his heart race, fearing the unknown reason for his impromptu summons. “Are you well?” He was startled by the sudden question, and he looked up quickly, seeing the dark eyes of Kogoro Katsura, the leader of the Choushu clan upon him, unwavering and unreadable.

Clearing his throat nervously he nodded, the movement jerky as he struggled to find his voice. “Yes, Sir.” He finally replied softly, silently applauding that it had emerged devoid of any indication of his inner turmoil.

“I am relieved to hear that.” He forced himself to continue meeting the older man's steady, unblinking gaze. “I have been concerned about you, Kenshin. You have been disappearing frequently of late.” He felt his heart stop and then begin anew at a frantic pace. “I am concerned that there is something you haven't been telling me.”

His hands tightened, clenching into the rough material of his hakama. Kogoro was not a man to be trifled with. He held the power to utterly destroy him if he chose to do so. His very life could rest on how well he could convince this shrewdest of men. “I don't understand, Sir.” He lowered his gaze to the floor, unable to meet the other man's unblinking stare any longer.

“You disappear from the inn at night…” He opened his mouth to speak when Kogoro held up his hand, staying his words. “Don't try to deny it. I've seen you myself. Where do you go, Kenshin?” He leaned forward, closer to his youngest warrior and frowned, seeing the unmistakable signs of nervousness. “Who do you meet so late at night?” When the red head bowed more, shielding his eyes, Kogoro sighed. “I don't want to have to do this, Kenshin, but it appears I must. Except on nights when you must see to your assignments I am confining you to the inn. I can't take any chances. There is a traitor among us and as much as I don't want to believe that man is you, I cannot allow the possibility to go uninvestigated.”

“I understand, Sir.” Saito wasn't going to like this. Inwardly he cringed, envisioning the older man's violent reaction to this turn of events. In a way he was relieved. Now he had an excuse to avoid the Shinsengumi captain on the appointed nights…every night, he quickly amended. But if Saito were to come in search of him…what then? He couldn't suppress a shiver of fear that raced up his spine. The older man was terrifying in his anger and he knew his punishment would be severe. Slowly he lifted his eyes to meet the other man's again, swallowing past the lump forming in his throat. He had no choice. He had to tell the truth…or at least part of it. “Sir, at night, when I leave…” He paused, trying unsuccessfully to still his trembling. “I-I go to meet someone…” He broke off, not knowing how to continue without revealing too much, yet afraid to reveal too little and earn more suspicion.

“Yes? Go on.” Kogoro's suspicions were now aroused. The younger man was usually much more self-contained than he was showing at the moment. If he didn't know better, he'd swear he saw a trace of fear in his usually implacable gaze. It made no sense to him. Himura Kenshin, his shadow assassin…hand-picked by himself personally…never showed fear. No emotion was allowed passed the emotionless mask he always wore.

“Th-there is someone…” It was so hard to say. He knew he shouldn't have said anything, that he should've just remained silent and accepted the command without further discussion. “He…” He stopped and flushed. “He is my…l-lover, Sir.” He ducked his head, cheeks flaming at the admission.

“I…see…” Kogoro was stunned. He never would have believed the young man before him was inclined to such things. It was intriguing. “This sheds new light on the mystery.” He murmured thoughtfully, wondering how he could use this information for his own purposes. He studied his bowed head for a moment. “Is this a matter of the heart then?”

His head came up abruptly. “No!” He winced at the force of his denial. “No, Sir.” He repeated a little more softly.

“A mere diversion then?” He found this much more to his liking. He tilted his head to the side in consideration, feeling his interest piqued. He'd admired the younger man from afar for some time and now he may have found a way to relieve his growing interest. The young hitokiri had always seemed unattainable, but now there may actually be a way to taste of what he'd often thought of as beyond his reach.

“Y-Yes, Sir.” He whispered. In this, there was no way he'd ever tell the truth. It was too humiliating by far.

“I won't ask his name, then.” The older man leaned forward. “If it is merely for physical gratification, why go to an outside source? Here, among your comrades, are any number of men more than willing to partake, Kenshin.” He paused and when he received no response he reached out and covered the younger man's hand with his own. “Including myself.”

He was stunned. Never in his wildest imaginings had he ever envisioned his leader saying such a thing to him. “S-sir?” He stared at the older man's hand over his own and swallowed. He had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“I have often admired you, Kenshin, though from a distance. I never thought you would be interested in an intimate relationship with another man. I am heartened to discover that assumption to be false.”

Oh Kami…what now?! “I-I'm…honored, Sir.” He whispered hoarsely before raising his head to meet the other man's steady gaze, afraid of what he'd see in his dark eyes. He trembled when he saw the same look of want reflected in his expression that Saito often wore. His situation had just gone from bad to worse. There was no way he could refuse the older man, not after having admitted to having a male lover. He couldn't just tell Kogoro that he wasn't interested.

Smiling, Kogoro shifted forward, bringing his hand up to gently caress the younger man's face, his long fingers trailing over the delicate features of the hitokiri. “Tonight, would you honor me by sharing in a rare moment of intimacy?” He waited, feeling his breath catch as the smaller man blushed and looked away to stare at the clock set to the side, his jaw clenching and unclenching in the silence that followed his request.

There was no help for it. To refuse was unthinkable. Slowly, hesitantly, he nodded his assent and moved closer to the older man, closing his eyes as he felt his hand reach up to remove the tie holding his hair in the high ponytail atop his head. As his hair fell around his shoulders he tilted his head to the side and waited. He didn't have long to wait before Kogoro's lips touched his own. The kiss was different than any other he'd experienced thus far. It was light and teasing, coaxing a response rather than merely plundering. He found himself responding, leaning closer, his hands coming up to rest on the larger man's broad shoulders as he deepened the kiss, his tongue tracing the contours of his mouth, lightly trailing over his teeth. He shuddered, feeling a stirring within him that was unlike the raw lust Saito instilled within him. He was afraid of the sensation, yet he yearned for more.

Releasing his lips he pulled back and shrugged out of his kimono, baring his muscular form. He waited, but the younger man didn't move, merely stayed in place, his face still tilted as if awaiting another kiss. Kogoro smiled, relishing the feelings the smaller man instilled within him. Assassin he may be, but he was still a man of flesh and bone, with the same thoughts and desires all men carried deep within their hearts and souls. He wished to cherish the young hitokiri in ways that he knew he'd never been cared for before. He felt a certain tenderness for the young man he'd turned into a killer that he knew would never be shared with any other. Gently tugging his dark gi loose from his hakama, his breath caught in his throat when the hard planes of his chest were revealed. Young and slight of build he may be, but the hitokiri was also a swordsman and his body revealed the rigors of his training, the slender form sleekly muscled and well toned. In a word, he was beautiful.



Slowly opening his eyes he watched in fascination as the older man's gaze traveled over his body with hunger reflected in his expression. But unlike the hunger Saito showed, Kogoro's expression also revealed his gentle nature. He knew instinctively that this man would not hurt him as the Shinsengumi captain was wont to do. He felt that Kogoro Katsura would not find pleasure in causing pain. He allowed himself a small glimmer of hope. Perhaps he could, for once, lose himself in the experience. As much as he wanted to deny it he couldn't any longer. He did crave the touch of his lover…even if he were another man. It was shocking for him to realize this, but though he also felt attraction to a beautiful woman…like Tomoe…he also felt a similar feeling towards an equally beautiful man. Saito wasn't physically beautiful to behold, yet he did contain a certain powerful magnetism that pulled him back to him each and every time, no matter how much the older man abused him he would always return for more because of that appeal. He may hate himself for it, but it was the simple truth.

Leaning forward, he pressed his lips to the younger man's shoulder, his arms moving around him to pull him closer. He smiled when he heard the soft shuddering sigh as he placed his hands against Kogoro's own shoulders. Reaching down, he tugged at the ties to his hakama, cursing the extra clothing the young hitokiri wore. He wanted to see him all at once, drink in the sight of his slender form and touch the warmth of his quivering muscles.

Pulling back, he smiled and stood to remove the last of his clothing. He stood before the older man, naked, unashamed for the first time to show his blatant desire. He closed his eyes again, tilting his head back on a soft sigh as Kogoro placed his arms around him, pressing his face against his stomach and merely held him for several long moments, his breath warm against his chilled flesh. He found it mildly amusing to discover that the previous warmth of the room had merely been a manifestation of his taut nerves.

Allowing his arms to fall back to his sides the leader of the Choushu clan reached for the smaller man's hands and gently tugged him down to the floor. He was heartened to see the other man's arousal. It meant that his own desire was returned. He was glad for that, knowing instinctively that his young hitokiri would not have refused him, regardless of his own secret longings. Running his hands over his arms, he gloried in the feel of his sleekly muscled body, feeling the slight tremors and hearing the soft sighs of pleasure. Reaching between them, he grasped the other man's hardened flesh and stroked him lightly, watching as his face flushed with his growing pleasure. Smiling, he claimed his lips in another kiss, this one more insistent and needy. His own lust was growing and he wanted desperately to feel the younger man's hands on his body, touching him as he was touching him. Breaking the kiss, he pressed his lips to his jaw and breathed deeply, seeking calm centering. He didn't wish to rush this. He'd secretly longed for the younger man from the moment he'd first set eyes on him and he wanted to enjoy every fleeting moment he had with him. “Touch me, Kenshin.” He whispered hoarsely, his need finally overcoming his control.

Slowly, he moved to comply, running his hands lightly over the larger man's shoulders and chest, pausing to brush his thumbs against the hardened peaks of his male nipples before continuing down, over the hard muscles of his abdomen. He paused, hesitating for a moment before he grasped the other man's hard arousal jutting forward proudly. At his sharp intake of breath, he began to stroke him, his hand moving slowly over the firm flesh.

Kogoro closed his eyes and gave himself up to the pleasure of feeling the younger man's sword callused hand moving over his straining member. He leaned back and slowly opened his eyes to watch as the hitokiri bent forward, lowering his head. He sucked in a sharp breath, realizing his intent immediately. He felt a thrill of excitement coarse down his spine as the warmth of his breath touched his engorged member. The next instant he threw his head back, stifling a loud groan of intense pleasure as his flesh was enveloped into the moist warmth of the smaller man's mouth. Moving his hands to run his fingers through the long red hair falling over his shoulders to brush against his thighs with the gentle bobbing movement of his head, his mouth fell open in ecstasy. Never would he have thought such intense longing could overcome his rigid control, but now he felt the need to bury himself deeply within the younger man threatening to break his restraint.

He felt his lips curve upwards in a contented smile, for once feeling pleasure at his actions. He found he liked bringing Kogoro pleasure in such a fashion whereas before he'd always been overcome with disgust. He could taste the other man's excitement as his coated his tongue and rather than gagging at it, he craved more. He moved his hands to lightly caress the older man's thighs, drawing his hardened flesh further into his mouth, gently sucking and earning another loud groan for his efforts.

His hips were rising to meet the downward motion of his younger lover's head and he lost himself in the intense sensations assaulting his senses. Finally, reluctantly, he pulled him away, fearing that he would finish too soon for his liking. Pulling him up for a deep, hungry kiss he reveled in the enthusiastic response, tasting himself on the other's tongue as it moved against his own. Pulling back, he breathed heavily, dark eyes lidded with intense need as he regarded the flushed features of the younger man. “I need you, Kenshin.” He whispered hoarsely. He breath caught when the smaller man nodded with a soft smile, amber eyes steady on his own and reflecting a similar need. Slowly he stood and unrolled his futon before opening a drawer in his dresser and removing a small jar filled with sweetly scented oil. He turned to find the young hitokiri already lying on the soft sheets of his futon, legs bent at the knees, his hardened member resting against the flat planes of his abdomen. He felt his breath catch in his throat at the sultry look in his eyes, sending warmth spiraling through his already intensely aroused body.

He closed his eyes and forced his breathing to remain light, though at the moment he was overcome by equal parts nervousness and eagerness. He'd never looked forward to this part with Saito. The older man had always instilled a sense of dread within him. But now he found that he wanted…no, needed the other man's body against his own. His hands fisted on the sheets beneath his back as he listened for Kogoro's movements. He didn't have long to wait before he felt the other man's warmth return to him. His breath hitched as he felt the warmth of his breath caress his throbbing length the moment before he touched the tip of his tongue to it, catching the moisture forming. His back arched off the futon, his breath emerging in soft pants of increasing need.

Kogoro gloried in the exquisite responsiveness of his younger lover as he drew his engorged flesh into his mouth, inhaling the scent of his male arousal. He sucked lightly, earning a soft moan for his action and moved his head in a slow, steady rhythm, enjoying the way the smaller man's hips lifted, eager for more attention. Slowly, regretfully, he lifted his head and sat back on his heels to reach for the small jar he'd set to the side. His hands shook as he fumbled with the lid as he succumbed to the driving need assailing his aroused flesh. He could prolong it no longer. He must have him. Now. Tossing the lid to the side he poured the oil into his hand and slowly rubbed it onto his throbbing member, hissing at the pleasure his actions brought to him. Satisfied, he poured more oil into his hand before setting the jar to the side. Coating his fingers with the glistening lubricant he leaned forward, urging the smaller man to lift his legs to his shoulders.

He hesitated a moment, uncertain what the older man was about to do, but he complied despite his moment of misgiving. Holding himself tensely, he awaited the other man's next action, his breath sounding harsh in the stillness of the room. “Relax, Kenshin.” Kogoro's soft voice soothed his nerves and he allowed his tense muscles to relax as he'd been told. The next instant his eyes opened wide, his lips forming a round `oh' of surprise as he felt the older man's long tapered fingers enter him slowly. His hands clenched into fists as he fought a surge of panic the sensation brought him. Saito had never touched him like this. He didn't know what to expect. A moment later a long, shuddering sigh escaped his parted lips as his hardened member was once again drawn into the delightful warmth of the older man's mouth. The combined sensations of the gently sucking mouth and thrusting fingers brought him close to the edge of bliss and he groaned loudly, his hips moving in urgent response.

Slowly releasing the younger man's rigid arousal with a final flick of his tongue, he pulled his fingers from deep within him, satisfied that he was sufficiently ready for him to continue. Reaching to the side, he wiped his fingers and moved to settle his weight over the smaller man, reaching down to guide his swollen member to the tight entrance. Panting with his need, he looked down into the young hitokiri's face, seeing an equal need to his own reflected in his tight features he pressed forward, slowly pushing his throbbing flesh into the tight passage, sighing as his flesh was welcomed with a low, shuddering sigh.

Shifting slightly, lifting his hips in blatant need, he felt his breath catch at the familiar sensation of being stretched and filled. Rather than being accompanied by pain, the pleasure was purely that this time. As the older man settled into a slow, rocking motion, he wrapped his legs around his hips, encouraging him to thrust into him deeper. His back arched as the larger man's penetration hit that now familiar spot within him that sent waves of intense pleasure rocking through his body. Groaning loudly at the sensation he lifted his arms to embrace the other man, pulling him closer as he lost himself in the tide of bliss assailing his senses.

Kogoro rested his head against the smaller man's shoulder, inhaling his unique scent, his body rocking against him in increasing eagerness. Never had he dreamt that such pleasure could be had from a coupling, but here was his proof. The younger man's erection throbbed against his stomach, trapped between them, begging for attention and he shifted to reach between them. He stopped when his wrist was captured in a loose hold. He looked questioningly into the bright amber gaze of his lover and smiled when he saw the lustful need reflected in his eyes. He slowly shook his head. “Please…” He whispered softly, his voice husky with want. “Don't…not yet…” His breathless plea threatened to shatter his tight restraint, but he nodded his understanding. He, too, didn't wish it to end yet.

He trembled, poised on the brink of the abyss of release, yet he fought it with all the control he could muster. He didn't want to orgasm, not yet. He wanted to continue to feel the intense pleasure the older man was bringing him and he feared the sensations would be lessened if he were to find his release too soon. He never wanted to return to Saito, but he felt a tiny niggling in the back of his mind that told him that nothing could ever compare to the violent explosiveness of their joining. Not even the gentle lovemaking he was experiencing for the first time with Kogoro Katsura. He feared that realization, not wanting to need Saito, but he knew it to be the truth and he wished to prolong his experience with his leader for as long as possible in order to push the other man as far from his mind as possible. He knew that there would be consequences to his actions that night, but he would face them later. For now, he wanted to lose himself in the sweet pleasure the older man was bringing him.

Lowering his head to claim the younger man's lips in a searing kiss of passion, Kogoro shuddered. He groaned deeply into the young hitokiri's mouth, trembling at the intensity of the orgasm wracking his body. He felt the smaller man suddenly go still, his member, still trapped between them, pulsing as warmth exploded from him and he knew that he had also fallen over the edge into his release. He was amazed that he had done so without further encouragement, but pleased nonetheless. Rolling to the side, he grimaced as the air touched the moisture on his stomach and chest. He reached down and touched his fingers to the cooling stickiness and traced a lazy pattern before lifting his hand to stare at the moisture glistening on the digits. Slowly he drew his fingers into his mouth, tasting the younger man's essence. He lowered his hand and sighed before turning his head to look at his lover. His chest was rising and falling rapidly, his skin glowing in the soft candle light, a fine sheen of sweat glistening on his slender form. His eyes fell on his face, seeing the soft smile curving his lips up sweetly. It was a singular unguarded moment for the young hitokiri and Kogoro relished it, knowing that in a few minutes his usual cold mask would be firmly in place once again.

Slowly stretching with the languorous motions of a cat, he turned his head and opened his eyes, finding Kogoro's gaze already on him. He had to leave soon if he was to meet Saito at the appointed time, but he didn't want to leave. He felt too contented to go to the other man and the known ordeal he'd have to face. He wanted to stay with Kogoro and bask in his tenderness. His smile slipped and a frown tugged his lips down. He felt badly for having to leave this man's futon for another. It felt…wrong. The thought left a bitter taste in his mouth and he felt wretched for even thinking it. What could Saito do if he didn't show up tonight? Would it be so bad if, for once, he stayed away? He then remembered the willow branch and suppressed a shudder. Saito would beat him and then punish him in other ways that were best left unthought-of.

Sighing deeply, Kogoro moved to stand, swiftly donning his discarded kimono. “When you leave me tonight, you will go to your lover, won't you?”

“I…” He wanted to deny it. Desperately so. But he knew that he couldn't. “Yes. I must.”

“I see.” He turned slowly and faced the young man he'd found his first true moment of bliss in for too long of a time to remember. “Will he be angered that you were in another's arms before him?”

He sat up and reached for his clothes. “I don't know.” He replied truthfully. “Maybe.” He shrugged as he tucked his gi into his hakama.

Kogoro's eyes widened. He had a horrible feeling that he now understood what the younger man was about to endure. It turned his stomach to think of someone causing pain to his beautiful young lover, yet he knew he had no right to interfere. He didn't understand the younger man's craving for the punishment he was certain to receive, but he was powerless to try to change his resolve. “There is a term for this, you know.” He silently applauded the way his voice remained neutral though he felt sick deep inside.

He went still, turning slowly to face the older man, his leader and now his lover. “Sir?” He asked softly, dreading the coldness in the other man's eyes.

“To feel pleasure at the pain inflicted by another, Kenshin. It is unfortunate that you are one of those that are ruled by this.” He paused and moved closer to the smaller man. “I cannot be the man to cause you the pain you want.” He pulled him into his arms for a tight embrace. “I cannot bring myself to do that to you.” He pressed his lips to the younger man's, feeling how they trembled against his own. He released him and stepped back, his arms falling to his side. “I pray you find happiness, someday, and will no longer feel the need to punish yourself in this manner.” With that said, he turned on his heel and strode from the room, feeling heartsick for the young hitokiri he'd come to treasure in the time he'd known him.

Slowly he raised his hand to touch his fingers to his lips, fighting the urge to cry. He didn't deserve the kindness and tenderness the other man had bestowed upon him. He bowed his head, hand falling to his side to clench into a tight fist. Was he right? Did he crave the pain Saito inflicted on him? His breath sounded loud in his ears as he realized the truth. Slowly he looked up and stared at the shouji Kogoro had disappeared through. He trembled and shook his head slowly, though he could no longer deny it. He returned to Saito night after night, endured the same pain and humiliation time and again, and for what purpose? He could refuse him. He could've killed him the second time they met…he'd been armed, not helpless. Yet he hadn't. He shook his head again, harder this time, feeling his heart constrict within his chest. Had he sunk so low as to actually find pleasure in Saito's cruelty as Kogoro suggested? He threw his head back, a silent cry of agony tightening his throat as he realized that he'd been right. He sought out Saito's punishment every night as a way to feel the pain he couldn't show. The physical pain inflicted on his body night after night gave release to the agony twisting his heart and soul.