Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction ❯ Kenji's First School Play ❯ Chapter One ( Chapter 1 )

DISCLAIMER: Rurouni Kenshin and Rurouni Kenshin characters are exclusively owned by Watsuki Nobuhiro, Shueisha, Sony Entertainment, Jump Comics and associated parties. Please note, this is purely fiction and for entertainment purposes only. This story is not meant for sale or profit.

Author's Notes: This is Little Kenji's first school play (he is 5yrs old). It will definitely not be your average school play when the Kenshin-gumi is involved. This fanfiction is a spin off from one of my earlier fics, Kenji's First Day at School. In that fic, Fujimoto Fujio is the nephew of Hajime Saitoh. ALL characters in this ficcie will be OOC (out of character). Kenji's First School Play, comedy fanfiction by Gypsy-Chan. Enjoy! (completed 7/11/01; edited 4/20/03)

Two days before the big school play, Kenshin, Kaoru and Kenji were on their way to Fujimoto Fujio's house. Kenji wanted to spend the afternoon with his new friend so that they could practice their parts for the school play. When they arrived, Hajime Saitoh answered the door. Kenshin was standing there with little Kenji. Saitoh and Kenshin began glaring at one another all the while keeping their hands on the hilt of their respective swords.

Fujio walked over to the door and saw Kenji standing with his father. He smiled and grabbed Kenji by the hand pulling him away from Kenshin.

"Come on let's practice our play," Fujio said.

Kenji nodded to his friend before turning back and waving goodbye to his mother. Kaoru smiled and waved goodbye as she watched the two boys running off into the house. She turned back to Kenshin and found that he and Saitoh were still standing in the same spot scowling at each other. She put her hands on her hips and frowned at the two men.

"Don't you two ever get tired of this?"

No one responded. She huffed and grabbed her husband by the ponytail. "Kenshin no baka! Let's go!!"

"Orooo!!"

Saitoh lingered in the doorway for a while watching Kaoru drag Kenshin by the ponytail down the road.

"That little tanuki always gets in the way of our fight," he scowled. "But I swear, I'll get you next time Battousai," he threatened inwardly. After closing the door behind him, he glanced around the room before reaching in his top right pocket and pulling out a cigarette. He lit the cigarette and inhaled deeply. After exhaling a large cloud of smoke, he heard Tokio yelling at him from another room.

"Haijime! I smell smoke! Are you smoking in the house again?"

Saitoh quickly grounded it out and replied, "No dear."

Tokio entered the room and glared at Saitoh. She knew he had been smoking. He could feel her ki growing stronger. He decided it was best to leave this battle for another day.

"I think I'll go polish my sword," he mentioned as he hastily left the room.

Later, after the boys had finished practicing, they had gotten hungry. Fujio went over to his aunt and tugged on her kimono.

"Aunt Tokio we're hungry. What's for lunch?"

Tokio smiled sweetly down to her nephew.

"Don't worry Fujio-chan. I'll get your uncle to make something good for you two to eat." Tokio turned to Saitoh, "I must get the laundry in before it rains. Could you make lunch for the boys dear."

Kenji whispered to Fujio, "Why did she call your uncle a deer. I thought you said that he was a wolf."

Fujio whispered back, "He is a wolf. I don't know why she keeps calling him deer."

"Maybe she doesn't know the difference between a wolf and a deer," Kenji replied. Fujio just shrugged his shoulders.

Tokio had the laundry basket in hand ready to go outside. She noticed that Saitoh was still sitting polishing his sword.

"Hajime please hurry and make the boys lunch. They're hungry."

"How many times must I tell you. I'm the Mibu Wolf, the strongest of the Shinsengumi. I don't cook or do housework like that weakling Battousai," he replied smugly.

"If you don't make their lunch I'll take your cigarettes away for a week," she replied sharply.

Saitoh turned to the kids and muttered, "What do you brats want for lunch."

They cheerfully replied, "Miso Soup!"

Saitoh began to grumble as he prepared the boys lunch. He noticed some vegetables on the kitchen counter. Tokio had set them out to go along with the meal. Before cutting the vegetables, Saitoh took up the Gatotsu stance. With his sword in hand he eye his prey dangerously before shouting, "Aku, Soku, Zan! (Sin, Swift, Slay!). The vegetables were cut into quarters. Unfortunately, the tip of his sword broke. Saitoh looked at the broken sword and frowned. "That's the third one this week. I hate these cheap swords. There's nothing like a good Japanese sword."

Later that evening, Saitoh and Kenji arrived at the Kamiya dojo. Kenshin answered the door and growled, "What do you want Saitoh."

An impish grin grew on Saitoh's face. "I represent Ishida Chemicals. I'm here to sell you some medicine," he quipped.

Kenshin put his hand on the hilt of his sword. "You're going to need that medicine when I'm done with you," he angrily replied. Saitoh also put his hand on his sword and took up the Gatotsu stance. "Anytime Battousai, anytime."

They both began to stare each other down. Kenji looked up at his father and Saitoh. He tugged on his father's hakama and said, "Play nice daddy okay."

Kenshin looked down at his son and smiled. "Hai Kenji-chan. Daddy will play nice." He then returned to staring evilly at Saitoh.

Kaoru walked to the door and took little Kenji by the hand inside. "Did you have a nice time practicing with Fujio today?"

"Hai," he answered as he sleepily rubbed his eyes.

"That's nice," she said as she picked her son up. "It looks like Kenji-chan is tired. Mommy will read you a short story before naptime." Kenji nodded sleepily as he rested his head on his mother's shoulders. Kaoru hummed a tune as she carried him off to his bedroom.

Five hours later, Kaoru had awakened from her sleep by a sudden chill. She noticed Kenshin wasn't in the futon with her. "Where's Kenshin? He never stays up this late? I wonder where he could be?"

She walked around the house looking for him. As she neared the door she found Kenshin and Saitoh still glaring at one another. A huge vein popped up on her head. She grabbed him by the ponytail and yelled,

"KENSHIN NO BAKA!!! COME TO BED!!!!"

"Oroo!!"

She turned and scowled at Saitoh. "GOOD NIGHT SAITOH-SAN!"

As the door slammed, Saitoh mumbled, "She did it again. Interfering with our fight. If I only had more time." He turned on his heels and went home.

The day of the school play finally arrived. Everyone at the Kamiya dojo was busy preparing for Kenji's first school play.

"Do you remember what you have to say?"

Kenji nodded, "Hai Mommy."

Seijurou Hiko, Kenshin's shishou (master) was at the dojo too. He walked over to Kenji and said, "Now remember Kenji-chan, one day you will be the fifteenth master of Hiten Mitsurugi Ryuu. Show no fear when you go on that stage today. Make me proud."

Kenji nodded, "Hai, Hiko-Ojiisan" (Grandpa Hiko).

He reached down and tousled Kenji's hair, "That's a good boy." He glanced around the room before kneeling beside Kenji and whispering, "But if you do get nervous, I'll give you a little sip of my saki. It works for me."

Kenshin yelled from the kitchen, "SHISHOU!!!

Yahiko and Sano laughed. Sano took Kenji away from Hiko and sat him next to Yahiko. It was his turn to give little Kenji advice.

"I hear that there are some girls in this play."

Kenji blinked and nodded his head to Sano.

"Well don't worry. When it comes to women, your Uncle Sano wrote the book. I'll teach you how to handle the girls. Even how to kiss them." He winked at Kenji.

Megumi entered the room at the end of Sano's conversation with Kenji. "Girls? Kissing? What's this about girls and kissing tori-ama? Last night you told me that I was the only one," she hissed before whacking him on the head.

"Ouch! Ouch! But you are the only one kitsune! Ouch! I wasn't talking about you. Ouch! Ouch!"

Sano rushed out of the room for his life. Megumi ran after him yelling, "Come back here you big rooster-head! I'm not finished with you yet!"

Yahiko laughed as he watched Megumi chasing Sano. Kenji sat confused. Yahiko put his arm around Kenji.

"See, your uncle Sano doesn't know anything about girls. Let me tell you about girls. They're bossy and ugly. Especially your moth..." Yahiko stopped after looking into Kenji's innocent blue eyes and changed his thoughts. "Well... we want talk about her. Just remember, stick to fighting and don't worry about kissing ugly girls."

Kenji nodded. "Hai."

Kaoru walked up. "Come Kenji-chan, we must hurry. You mustn't waste time with Yahiko-CHAN."

"STOP CALLING ME LITTLE!!"

Kaoru and Yahiko were ready to fight. Kenshin came over, "Maa, maa (Now, now), we mustn't be late. Shall we go?" Kenshin took Kenji by the hand. Everyone headed for the school.


GO TO PART TWO

Author's Notes: Please note, all of the RK characters are totally out of character. I wrote this just for laughs.^_^