Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction ❯ The Crooked Path Series ❯ VI. Dreams ( Chapter 6 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

*Background music: Maaya Sakamoto's "Kodoku" and "Into the Light"*

Almost at the end of the road, folks... this is the second last story in the "Crooked Path" series. C&C will be forever cherished, much like Sano's bandanna.

Rating: R for language and sexual situations.

You might already know that I'm not a nice romantic. I feel that it is only fair to warn you that anything can happen. Anything.

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Pain flickered at the edge of his senses, gnawing on nerve endings like a hungry beast. He hurt, and every effort to reach the faint light intensified his agony. Instinctively retreating, he sank deeper into the comforting darkness.

Saitou breathed in deeply, smelling grass and damp earth and a hint of wildflowers. A mischievous breeze caressed his face, whisking away the warmth of the sun.

What?

His eyes snapped open, and he immediately regretted the action. A blue expanse filled his sight, the brightness making his eyes water. He rolled to his side, grass tickling his cheek. Disbelievingly, he plucked a blade of the long grass and held it up to his gaze, watching as greenish sap dampened his fingers.

A thought struck him. He was beaten -- probably badly -- by that traitorous Koga and his gangg of "dissidents". So why wasn't he hurting?

Saitou sat up warily, surveying his surroundings with the suspicious eyes of a hunter. He seemed to be in a grassy plain, stretching out towards the horizon. No tree or rock broke the monotony of the tall grass, undulating to the music of the wind. There was not one cloud in the sky, nor another living creature besides him.

It was unnerving. Saitou never considered himself even remotely agoraphobic, but he found himself wishing for a shadowy alley to lurk in.

"Am I dead?" he said out loud, tasting every syllable of the ridiculous words.

"Nah," said a cheerful voice behind him. "Welcome to the place in between, Saitou."

He twisted around, hand dropping to where his nihontou should be. Finding empty air in its place, he could only stare into a painfully familiar set of brown eyes.

"Looking for this?" Callused hands offered his sword to him, the laughing gaze of the other man making him grit his teeth. Saitou glared back, deliberately not looking at the sheathed blade.

"Sanosuke?" he asked harshly, ruthlessly suppressing any hint of longing in that question.

The man pouted innocently. "If that's who you want me to be." Saitou could have drawn the face before him from memory, had he the skill and art. "Of course, if you prefer Tokio..."

Saitou snarled, drawing the sword from its sheath in one fluid movement and pressing it against the other's neck. "Don't play games with me, ahou," he warned in a low voice, cold fury hardening his face.

Instead of grovelling for his life, 'Sanosuke' merely rolled his eyes. "Spare the messenger, okay? For all intent and purposes, I am Sanosuke."

"I don't believe you."

"Listen to your heart, Hajime."

"Stop calling me that! This is impossible."

"Jump me and see for yourself," 'Sano' grinned. He pushed away the steel blade with gentle fingers, leaning closer to the older man when no resistance was forthcoming. "See..." he breathed, warm air brushing against Saitou's lips.

The man smelled like the Sano he remembered, all musk and sandalwood. Groaning, Saitou bridged the paper- thin distance between them, pressing their lips together in a violent kiss. The sword fell from his hands when their tongues met, the taste so achingly well-known. To his horror, he found his control slipping as he fought the urge to weep into Sano's hair.

He pushed off the younger man roughly, sending him sprawling into the grass. Hurt, puzzled brown eyes looked up at him.

"What'd you do that for?" Sano complained plaintively, brushing bits of grass from his white jacket. "I thought you missed me."

Amber eyes narrowed. "It was my... 'missing' you that drove me into Koga's trap, rooster-head," he grated out.

Sano laughed contemptously. "Don't give me that shit, Saitou," he spat. "The real reason why you forced his legs apart was to find out if you still had it in you."

"'It', ahou? I find it unlikely that I would need to prove my manhood."

"I have a name. Use it." The younger man's lips curled. "And it's all very well to hide from a boy in love, Saitou Hajime, but this is the place in between. No lies. Truth is all you'll find here, even if it hurts like hell."

Saitou answered the sneer with one of his own. "Tell me the truth, then... ahou."

"You didn't come to Koga 'cause of loneliness, or even an easy fuck. Hell, Saitou, you should've seen the signs, should've seen he wasn't real." Anger stained Sano's cheeks. "You fucked him because you wanted to prove you still had control. You wanted so much to conquer him, like you never did me, that you ignored the warning signs."

Sano knelt before the older man, jacket flapping open in the breeze. "You like being in control, don't you? It amused you to be oh so fucking cool and calm, while other men threw their reason away for a pretty bit of flesh."

He shoved, hard. Saitou found himself on his back as Sano loomed over him, youthful features twisted in rage. "If you wanted a pet, get a dog," Sano snarled. "I loved you, damn it, but I won't be anyone's mindless doll. Or punching bag. Take me as I am, Saitou -- a human being, no more and no less. I'm loud, brash, and I have a mind of my own. Deal with it."

The ends of Sano's red bandanna fluttered, tickling Saitou's cheek. The young man's hands gripped the earth on either side of him, arms trembling. Only a few inches of air separated their faces, but it might just as well have been a canyon. Sano's body shielded him from the sunlight, blanketing Saitou with the shadows he had previously craved.

He ran his hands up Sano's arms, ignoring the sudden stiffening. The need for contact lured him to his former lover's muscular chest, warm and smooth. His questing fingers roamed upwards, cupping the other man's face.

Gently, he drew Sano down until their foreheads touched. "I don't know how," Saitou admitted, sensing something break within him. "I don't know how to give you what you need, Sano."

He'd expected to feel humiliated, even angry. Instead he felt only relief.

Sano sighed, kissing his eyelids. "Then trust me to teach you, as your companion and lover. I won't betray you, Saitou. Ever." He curled up against Saitou's body, nuzzling the older man's throat. "Let go, for once. Please."

"This isn't real," Saitou groaned, as sharp teeth nipped his shoulder.

"It's as real as you want it to be. Wolves follow their nature, but men make their own destiny."

"Hn." The amber-eyed man looked down. "You're not the real Sanosuke," he accused flatly. "The rooster-head would never--"

Sano laughed. "You'll be surprised," he purred sensuously. "You'll have to know me again, Saitou Hajime. But I won't be complaining, nope."

He shrugged his jacket off, grinning at the flare of desire in Saitou's eyes. Naked from the waist up, Sano was a vision, his skin pink with warmth. He trailed little kisses up the other man's throat, culminating in a long, lazy press of lips to lips.

"Let me love you," he pleaded quietly.

Saitou shuddered. "If I do, I will be lost."

"I'll find you." The dark-eyed man stroked his lover's hair, pain cracking his voice. "I'll bring you home again, so you can leave in the morning as Fujita Gorou and get hurt where I can't help you."

Deliberately, Saitou brought Sano's hand to his lips and kissed every digit. "What do you get out of this?" he asked, the tip of his tongue flicking against a finger.

"Your promise to return to me."

"You know I can't do that."

"I think you can," Sano retorted. "Why, old man, afraid that I'll wear you out?"

The 'old man' smirked. "Do your worst, brat."

Clothes went flying as their play turned rough, the smell of crushed grass rising from under their tangled bodies. Sano was breathless with laughter, and even Saitou let out a chuckle or two. They rolled to a stop, Sano pressing down on Saitou's lean body.

They lay there, panting, enjoying the crackle in the tension between them. Sano's head dipped, lazily kissing Saitou on the mouth. He slid lower, wet, open-mouthed kisses marking a trail down Saitou's torso. Reaching his lover's now-erect cock, he looked up, a silent question in his eyes.

Saitou nodded, doubts and questions evaporating like mist in the sun. He was lost, he knew, the moment Sano's hot mouth closed around his length. This time he gladly surrendered to the scorching passion, reason and control fleeing his mind, waiting for his lover to bring him back into himself.

He screamed.

Later, they curled around each other, basking in the sun. Sano's eyes were half-closed, his head tucked into the crook of Saitou's neck. The older man's strong arms were wrapped around his sated body, a comfort more welcome than any blanket.

"I have to leave now," Saitou whispered into the scruffy hair. Regretfully, he removed himself from Sano's cozy embrace and began to gather his clothes. "I can hear him -- the real Sanosuke -- calling me."

'Sano' pulled himself up, gazing at the taller man. "It'll hurt," he warned. "A lot."

"I can handle pain," Saitou responded curtly, buttoning up his uniform. "It is something I've had much experience with."

The brown eyes seemed old now, as if they had been witness to the infinite span of human suffering. "But can you handle the pain there?" he asked, touching Saitou's chest where the heart was. His other hand pressed against his own chest. "And the pain here?"

Saitou hesitated. "I will not forget what I learned in this place."

"If that's not enough?"

Belting on his sword, he answered gravely, "Then I will find another way, or make one."

"Big surprise there, Saitou," the young man chuckled. "You're ready now, more or less. Sayonara, koibito."

"Until we meet again." Saitou turned away and walked towards the light, where agonizing pain and a fragile human heart awaited him.

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