Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Lead me not into Temptation ❯ Chapter 10
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: Serenitas 
Anime/Manga: Sailor Moon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.15.2002 | Pages: 3 | Words: 2.6K | Visits: 712 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: Sailor Moon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.15.2002 | Pages: 3 | Words: 2.6K | Visits: 712 | Status: Completed
Hello all once more! Well here we are at the last chapter of this current story, but I've been working on another fanfic which will be my first attempt at a romantic comedy (once again Usagi and Mamoru, with Minako interference - though not to the extreme she went in this story) which I'm titling "What if I do?" I'm so glad so many people liked my last chapter, and yes I did make reference to the song Austin and forgot to mention it in my notes, so I'll mention it here because I may use it again since I love that song. I'm so glad that other people and not just me are able to identify with Usagi's pain here, since I'm putting a lot of my own personal experiences down here and the like. So without further ado, here is the final chapter. Hope you all keep reading the rest of my work, I might try putting out two fanfics at once…we'll see. It depends on how many people indicate they'd like to keep reading my stuff. Remember I write based on reviews, so read, review and be kind. Enjoy!
A seething Sailor Venus raced through the streets of Juuban, heading for the Hikawa Jinja. "How dare they lock me in a closet. Oh Motoki will pay for that one." She muttered under her breath, racing across the grounds. She came a dead halt when she saw Rei and a very subdued Chibi Usa. "Rei! What are you doing here?" she exclaimed.
Rei rolled her eyes. "I live here stupid."
"I knew that." Minako nodded.
Rei gestured to the concoction that Minako held in her hands. "Is that the love and truth potion you want to use on Mamoru and Usagi?"
"Yes it is."
"Give me some of it. I want to use it on Chibi Usa here to see how she really feels about her mother. I don't think she hates her as much as she lets on."
"I don't know about that Rei." Minako eyed the pink haired girl warily.
Chibi Usa lifted her head and let out a string of curses that weren't appropriate for a child her age. Minako and Rei raised their eyebrows. "She must have heard Usagi last time she lost her temper." Rei commented, then winced. "That's one I haven't heard before."
The doors to the jinja opened and Usagi stood before them, tears in her eyes. "I have to go."
"What happened?" Rei demanded. "Are you ok?"
Usagi looked at Rei and Minako, her eyes bright and her smile radiant for the first time in a long time. "I think I'm ok Rei. I need to find Motoki."
"Motoki? Shouldn't it be Mamoru?"
"Not yet." Usagi shook her head. She walked over to Chibi Usa and looked down at her future daughter. "I don't know if you realize that they way you've been treating me is screwing and diminishing your chances of ever being born, since I know what kind of a child you'll be I really don't want to have you. Sorry about that."
Chibi Usa's eyes widened, obviously never having thought about it. "I don't want you to have Mamo-chan."
"But he's your father." Usagi said gently. "Why do you want him so?"
"He's mine. He always loved me more than you, even in the future, always put me before you, always believed me over you. He was never yours once I came." Chibi Usa spat.
Usagi smiled gently. "Believe what you want. Perhaps he was like that in the future, but he won't be now, I assure you. Everything that happens here in the past affects the memories of those in the future and when you finally do return home, it will be to a far different future than the one you left. Think on that for awhile." She nodded at the girls. "See you."
Mamoru was skipping stones over the lake musing that it was like the blue of her eyes. "God I'm pathetic." He muttered aloud.
"Agreed."
He glanced over his shoulder and saw the Outers standing there. "What do you want?" he groaned. "I think you've all done enough."
"We may have made things worse." Haruka said sheepishly. "We kind of locked Minako in a closet and ignored her."
"Until she broke down the door." Michiru finished. "Now she's hunting you and Usagi."
Mamoru's eyes were very wide as he bit back laughter. "What were you thinking when you did that?" he asked in a too-calm voice.
"We were trying to help you and Kitten."
Mamoru burst out laughing, his first true laughter in a very long time. "That has to be one of the dumbest things I've ever heard."
"About as dumb as leaving Usagi." Haruka retorted.
"I've made up and suffered for my mistake."
"And now you give her the space to work out her problems. I think you've succeeded where all others failed." Setsuna nodded. "Though I can't be certain yet."
"Well thank you." Mamoru nodded.
"Thank yourself." Haruka replied. "It was your persistence that may have drawn her back."
Mamoru stood there, a dumbstruck look on his face; desperately wanting to believe it was true, unable to consider that he had finally done what he yearned for. Had he really gotten her back?
Usagi raced into the arcade, certain Motoki was here. "Oniisan!" she called out. "Where are you?"
Motoki poked his head around the corner. "Are you alone?"
Usagi looked bewildered. "I am."
He came the rest of the way out. "What can I do for you imouto?"
Usagi took a deep breath. "I called Mamoru's answering machine…"
"You heard his message." Motoki nodded. "You haven't dialled his number since you broke up did you?"
"No."
"The message changes every few days, but the last part about his still loving you has been on his machine for two years." Motoki admitted. "I've wanted to tell you so often."
Usagi dropped her head, tears welling up. "Thank you Motoki. That's all I needed to hear."
"Did it work Usagi? Has he finally broken through your barriers? Do you finally want to stop killing yourself?" Motoki asked gently.
Usagi looked up at him. "I don't know Motoki, all I know is that I hurt inside because I'm FEELING. I haven't felt or let myself feel for so long. I have all this emotion and it HURTS. I'm not used to emotion anymore."
Motoki hugged her tightly. "Imouto, go to him. He needs you just like you need him. You complete each other and keep each other out of the darkness that threatens."
"But Motoki, what if he hurts me again? What if he betrays me?" Usagi asked wretchedly.
"Love is about trust imouto. Without trust there can be no love, so you have to take a risk and decide to trust him again, or not." Motoki said gently. "Close your eyes little sister and tell me how you feel about him, right here, right now."
Usagi shook her head. "I can't Motoki."
"Then perhaps he doesn't mean as much to you as he thought."
Usagi closed her eyes, was she willing to gamble with her whole being again? "I love him. Until the end of time." She said softly.
"Then go to him Usagi and tell him. There is no more remorse, no more love and hate, just love." Motoki urged her.
Usagi looked at him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you Oniisan." She smiled. "I love you too."
"I know." He chuckled.
Usagi ran from the arcade heading for her lonely home to do some thinking. "I can't believe I just saw that." An awestruck voice said from the shadows.
Motoki's eyes widened in fear. "Minako."
Minako walked over to him. "I doubt I could have done better with her."
"I just know her differently from her. You talk to her like a friend, I talk to her like a brother." (A.N - I WISH my brother would be so understanding, instead he talks of guerrilla warfare.)
Minako smiled. "I bow in the presence of a master."
"Is your rampage done?" Motoki asked hopefully.
"For them. Ami and Ryo are my next project."
Motoki groaned. "Minako, why don't you concentrate on another couple instead?"
She eyed him suspiciously. "What couple?"
"Us." Motoki pulled her close and kissed her.
Minako decided Ami and Ryo could wait awhile longer as she wrapped her arms around Motoki's neck. For the first time in years, the cursed scout felt love and gave herself up to the emotion she embodied but had never felt. She understood Usagi much better now, the inflection she'd get in her voice, the look she'd get on her face when she spoke of Mamoru. She understood and she wished her friend well then gave herself up to the emotion in Motoki's kiss.
Usagi looked at herself in the mirror, still seeing the same horrid person, the same person laden with guilt, the same person with blood on her hands, the one unworthy of love. She saw this person in the mirror with a smile on her face. She opened her locket and nearly dropped it as the glow practically blinded her. Somehow he had gotten to her before she knew it. "It's so confusing these questions of the heart." She murmured. "He's followed me through changes, and patiently he's waited."
"He's waited long enough." Usagi nodded. "I can't go on alone and I'm so tired of being lonely." She knew she had a long road ahead of her, many issues to still work through, but she would do it with him. She remembered something her mother had told her long ago, and now she knew the truth of those words. Simple words that shook her soul. "The greatest gift you'll ever learn is just to love, and be loved in return." She smiled. "I remember how to love."
Unwilling…unable - to wait another minute, she pinched her cheeks to put colour in them and then left her house, no longer quite so empty. She could have sworn she heard the sighs of her dead family, encouraging and happy for her, willing to let their souls rest at last.
He was in the park. Appropriate he thought, since this was where Chibi Usa first fell on Usagi's head and things came unravelled from there. "I'll wait forever if I have to." His spine stiffened when he sensed he wasn't alone. "Who's there?"
(A.N - direct quote from 'Austin' here because it fits just so well…) "If you're asking about my heart, it's still yours, I should have listened to it a little more, then it wouldn't have taken me so long to know where I belong." A pause. "I still love you."
He shook his head, convinced he was hallucinating. Turning slowly, he saw Usagi standing there like an angel of mercy. "What?" he asked, unable to believe his ears.
"You've waited until I came to my senses through some miracle of fate." Usagi smiled. "I still hurt and I have a lot to work through and get over, but you were right. You take away my emptiness, my loneliness. The guilt and pain may never go away, but if I know I'll have you with me, then I can move on."
"Usako?" he whispered.
She shook her head. "Good luck, it finally struck like lightning from the blue. Every highway leads me back to you." She walked closer to him. "All is said and done, the search has come full circle, and our destinies are one." She paused. "You were with me all the while."
Mamoru closed his eyes. She had come back to him. He reached for their broken and tarnished bond and felt her reaching for him. The force of their joining made him feel he had never seen the sky before. He knew her fears, knew what she was risking by coming back to him and he vowed he'd never hurt her again. "I love you." It was all he could say.
It was enough. Standing on her tiptoes, she brushed a lock of his hair from his face. "Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste."
"Never." He wrapped an arm around her waist. "I'm going to kiss you now."
"And about time." She grinned. "I love you too. Come what may."
Their lips joined and the chasm that existed in their hearts healed, a bridge once more rebuilt.
"Get your head down Haruka! I can't see!" Rei protested in a hot whisper.
"WOW!" Makoto exclaimed softly. "His hands are moving!"
"Look at her, I never knew a back could arch that far!" Minako added, her hand squeezing Motoki's.
"Guys, this is wrong, we shouldn't be doing this!"
"In that case Ami, why are you here?"
"Oh no, Chibi Usa!" Ami exclaimed.
"She'll ruin everything!" Michiru snapped. "Damn it!"
"Shut up and listen."
"Usagi?" a small voice managed to break through the passion induced fog that had enveloped Usagi and Mamoru. He had bent her back and stretched her nearly to the breaking point and she didn't give a damn. She wasn't alone anymore and her heart was full.
Groaning in frustration, Mamoru helped her up as they broke apart. "Chibi Usa." She sighed.
Chibi Usa ground her toe into the ground. "I'm sorry you know. I know I'm a brat. I watched my mummy in the future and she's so graceful and elegant, never gets upset or cries or has anything wrong with her. When I came to the past and found out it was you, I expected you to be just like her. When you didn't live up to that, I felt I had the right to judge you, to hurt you. I was disappointed. For Mamoru, I knew you were my future father, but he's there, and he always told me I was his special number one girl. I've always loved my father in a way that was more than a daughter should I guess."
"Oedipus complex." Mamoru nodded. "I have heard of it."
"I thought it was Freudian." Usagi jabbed him with an elbow. "What are you trying to say Chibi Usa?"
"I'm sorry. I know you can't forgive me for how horrible I've been over the last few years and that's fine. I'm going back to the future to stay there. So, goodbye." She nodded. "I'll be nicer to you in the future too."
Usagi smiled. "Thank you Chibi Usa, that means a lot."
She said nothing as she raised the time key and vanished through her little hole in the sky. "And in the end I stand back at the beginning with you."
Mamoru glanced at the shaking and giggling bushes. "You can come out now minna."
They all fell out onto the pathway. "Oh hi." Haruka smiled from her undignified position. "Just doing some recon here, checking for youma activity."
"Right!" the others chimed.
Haruka pulled herself to her feet. "However Mamoru, take this as a warning…you break her heart, I'll break your neck." She smiled.
Usagi didn't give Mamoru a chance to answer. She drew his head back to hers and pulled him close as her friends formed a protective circle around her, all vowing to keep the alone away from one who never should feel hurt like that again.
**May the circle be unbroken…**
And that is the end of this fanfic! I hope you all enjoyed it. I ran into a bit of trouble towards the end, but thought I did pretty good. Depression is a serious and dangerous thing, I know this because I have lived through a serious one, but if you have a good net of friends and Usagi did in this story and as I did in real life, then you can work through it. Check out my websites!
Talk to you all tomorrow! ~_^
A seething Sailor Venus raced through the streets of Juuban, heading for the Hikawa Jinja. "How dare they lock me in a closet. Oh Motoki will pay for that one." She muttered under her breath, racing across the grounds. She came a dead halt when she saw Rei and a very subdued Chibi Usa. "Rei! What are you doing here?" she exclaimed.
Rei rolled her eyes. "I live here stupid."
"I knew that." Minako nodded.
Rei gestured to the concoction that Minako held in her hands. "Is that the love and truth potion you want to use on Mamoru and Usagi?"
"Yes it is."
"Give me some of it. I want to use it on Chibi Usa here to see how she really feels about her mother. I don't think she hates her as much as she lets on."
"I don't know about that Rei." Minako eyed the pink haired girl warily.
Chibi Usa lifted her head and let out a string of curses that weren't appropriate for a child her age. Minako and Rei raised their eyebrows. "She must have heard Usagi last time she lost her temper." Rei commented, then winced. "That's one I haven't heard before."
The doors to the jinja opened and Usagi stood before them, tears in her eyes. "I have to go."
"What happened?" Rei demanded. "Are you ok?"
Usagi looked at Rei and Minako, her eyes bright and her smile radiant for the first time in a long time. "I think I'm ok Rei. I need to find Motoki."
"Motoki? Shouldn't it be Mamoru?"
"Not yet." Usagi shook her head. She walked over to Chibi Usa and looked down at her future daughter. "I don't know if you realize that they way you've been treating me is screwing and diminishing your chances of ever being born, since I know what kind of a child you'll be I really don't want to have you. Sorry about that."
Chibi Usa's eyes widened, obviously never having thought about it. "I don't want you to have Mamo-chan."
"But he's your father." Usagi said gently. "Why do you want him so?"
"He's mine. He always loved me more than you, even in the future, always put me before you, always believed me over you. He was never yours once I came." Chibi Usa spat.
Usagi smiled gently. "Believe what you want. Perhaps he was like that in the future, but he won't be now, I assure you. Everything that happens here in the past affects the memories of those in the future and when you finally do return home, it will be to a far different future than the one you left. Think on that for awhile." She nodded at the girls. "See you."
Mamoru was skipping stones over the lake musing that it was like the blue of her eyes. "God I'm pathetic." He muttered aloud.
"Agreed."
He glanced over his shoulder and saw the Outers standing there. "What do you want?" he groaned. "I think you've all done enough."
"We may have made things worse." Haruka said sheepishly. "We kind of locked Minako in a closet and ignored her."
"Until she broke down the door." Michiru finished. "Now she's hunting you and Usagi."
Mamoru's eyes were very wide as he bit back laughter. "What were you thinking when you did that?" he asked in a too-calm voice.
"We were trying to help you and Kitten."
Mamoru burst out laughing, his first true laughter in a very long time. "That has to be one of the dumbest things I've ever heard."
"About as dumb as leaving Usagi." Haruka retorted.
"I've made up and suffered for my mistake."
"And now you give her the space to work out her problems. I think you've succeeded where all others failed." Setsuna nodded. "Though I can't be certain yet."
"Well thank you." Mamoru nodded.
"Thank yourself." Haruka replied. "It was your persistence that may have drawn her back."
Mamoru stood there, a dumbstruck look on his face; desperately wanting to believe it was true, unable to consider that he had finally done what he yearned for. Had he really gotten her back?
Usagi raced into the arcade, certain Motoki was here. "Oniisan!" she called out. "Where are you?"
Motoki poked his head around the corner. "Are you alone?"
Usagi looked bewildered. "I am."
He came the rest of the way out. "What can I do for you imouto?"
Usagi took a deep breath. "I called Mamoru's answering machine…"
"You heard his message." Motoki nodded. "You haven't dialled his number since you broke up did you?"
"No."
"The message changes every few days, but the last part about his still loving you has been on his machine for two years." Motoki admitted. "I've wanted to tell you so often."
Usagi dropped her head, tears welling up. "Thank you Motoki. That's all I needed to hear."
"Did it work Usagi? Has he finally broken through your barriers? Do you finally want to stop killing yourself?" Motoki asked gently.
Usagi looked up at him. "I don't know Motoki, all I know is that I hurt inside because I'm FEELING. I haven't felt or let myself feel for so long. I have all this emotion and it HURTS. I'm not used to emotion anymore."
Motoki hugged her tightly. "Imouto, go to him. He needs you just like you need him. You complete each other and keep each other out of the darkness that threatens."
"But Motoki, what if he hurts me again? What if he betrays me?" Usagi asked wretchedly.
"Love is about trust imouto. Without trust there can be no love, so you have to take a risk and decide to trust him again, or not." Motoki said gently. "Close your eyes little sister and tell me how you feel about him, right here, right now."
Usagi shook her head. "I can't Motoki."
"Then perhaps he doesn't mean as much to you as he thought."
Usagi closed her eyes, was she willing to gamble with her whole being again? "I love him. Until the end of time." She said softly.
"Then go to him Usagi and tell him. There is no more remorse, no more love and hate, just love." Motoki urged her.
Usagi looked at him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you Oniisan." She smiled. "I love you too."
"I know." He chuckled.
Usagi ran from the arcade heading for her lonely home to do some thinking. "I can't believe I just saw that." An awestruck voice said from the shadows.
Motoki's eyes widened in fear. "Minako."
Minako walked over to him. "I doubt I could have done better with her."
"I just know her differently from her. You talk to her like a friend, I talk to her like a brother." (A.N - I WISH my brother would be so understanding, instead he talks of guerrilla warfare.)
Minako smiled. "I bow in the presence of a master."
"Is your rampage done?" Motoki asked hopefully.
"For them. Ami and Ryo are my next project."
Motoki groaned. "Minako, why don't you concentrate on another couple instead?"
She eyed him suspiciously. "What couple?"
"Us." Motoki pulled her close and kissed her.
Minako decided Ami and Ryo could wait awhile longer as she wrapped her arms around Motoki's neck. For the first time in years, the cursed scout felt love and gave herself up to the emotion she embodied but had never felt. She understood Usagi much better now, the inflection she'd get in her voice, the look she'd get on her face when she spoke of Mamoru. She understood and she wished her friend well then gave herself up to the emotion in Motoki's kiss.
Usagi looked at herself in the mirror, still seeing the same horrid person, the same person laden with guilt, the same person with blood on her hands, the one unworthy of love. She saw this person in the mirror with a smile on her face. She opened her locket and nearly dropped it as the glow practically blinded her. Somehow he had gotten to her before she knew it. "It's so confusing these questions of the heart." She murmured. "He's followed me through changes, and patiently he's waited."
"He's waited long enough." Usagi nodded. "I can't go on alone and I'm so tired of being lonely." She knew she had a long road ahead of her, many issues to still work through, but she would do it with him. She remembered something her mother had told her long ago, and now she knew the truth of those words. Simple words that shook her soul. "The greatest gift you'll ever learn is just to love, and be loved in return." She smiled. "I remember how to love."
Unwilling…unable - to wait another minute, she pinched her cheeks to put colour in them and then left her house, no longer quite so empty. She could have sworn she heard the sighs of her dead family, encouraging and happy for her, willing to let their souls rest at last.
He was in the park. Appropriate he thought, since this was where Chibi Usa first fell on Usagi's head and things came unravelled from there. "I'll wait forever if I have to." His spine stiffened when he sensed he wasn't alone. "Who's there?"
(A.N - direct quote from 'Austin' here because it fits just so well…) "If you're asking about my heart, it's still yours, I should have listened to it a little more, then it wouldn't have taken me so long to know where I belong." A pause. "I still love you."
He shook his head, convinced he was hallucinating. Turning slowly, he saw Usagi standing there like an angel of mercy. "What?" he asked, unable to believe his ears.
"You've waited until I came to my senses through some miracle of fate." Usagi smiled. "I still hurt and I have a lot to work through and get over, but you were right. You take away my emptiness, my loneliness. The guilt and pain may never go away, but if I know I'll have you with me, then I can move on."
"Usako?" he whispered.
She shook her head. "Good luck, it finally struck like lightning from the blue. Every highway leads me back to you." She walked closer to him. "All is said and done, the search has come full circle, and our destinies are one." She paused. "You were with me all the while."
Mamoru closed his eyes. She had come back to him. He reached for their broken and tarnished bond and felt her reaching for him. The force of their joining made him feel he had never seen the sky before. He knew her fears, knew what she was risking by coming back to him and he vowed he'd never hurt her again. "I love you." It was all he could say.
It was enough. Standing on her tiptoes, she brushed a lock of his hair from his face. "Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste."
"Never." He wrapped an arm around her waist. "I'm going to kiss you now."
"And about time." She grinned. "I love you too. Come what may."
Their lips joined and the chasm that existed in their hearts healed, a bridge once more rebuilt.
"Get your head down Haruka! I can't see!" Rei protested in a hot whisper.
"WOW!" Makoto exclaimed softly. "His hands are moving!"
"Look at her, I never knew a back could arch that far!" Minako added, her hand squeezing Motoki's.
"Guys, this is wrong, we shouldn't be doing this!"
"In that case Ami, why are you here?"
"Oh no, Chibi Usa!" Ami exclaimed.
"She'll ruin everything!" Michiru snapped. "Damn it!"
"Shut up and listen."
"Usagi?" a small voice managed to break through the passion induced fog that had enveloped Usagi and Mamoru. He had bent her back and stretched her nearly to the breaking point and she didn't give a damn. She wasn't alone anymore and her heart was full.
Groaning in frustration, Mamoru helped her up as they broke apart. "Chibi Usa." She sighed.
Chibi Usa ground her toe into the ground. "I'm sorry you know. I know I'm a brat. I watched my mummy in the future and she's so graceful and elegant, never gets upset or cries or has anything wrong with her. When I came to the past and found out it was you, I expected you to be just like her. When you didn't live up to that, I felt I had the right to judge you, to hurt you. I was disappointed. For Mamoru, I knew you were my future father, but he's there, and he always told me I was his special number one girl. I've always loved my father in a way that was more than a daughter should I guess."
"Oedipus complex." Mamoru nodded. "I have heard of it."
"I thought it was Freudian." Usagi jabbed him with an elbow. "What are you trying to say Chibi Usa?"
"I'm sorry. I know you can't forgive me for how horrible I've been over the last few years and that's fine. I'm going back to the future to stay there. So, goodbye." She nodded. "I'll be nicer to you in the future too."
Usagi smiled. "Thank you Chibi Usa, that means a lot."
She said nothing as she raised the time key and vanished through her little hole in the sky. "And in the end I stand back at the beginning with you."
Mamoru glanced at the shaking and giggling bushes. "You can come out now minna."
They all fell out onto the pathway. "Oh hi." Haruka smiled from her undignified position. "Just doing some recon here, checking for youma activity."
"Right!" the others chimed.
Haruka pulled herself to her feet. "However Mamoru, take this as a warning…you break her heart, I'll break your neck." She smiled.
Usagi didn't give Mamoru a chance to answer. She drew his head back to hers and pulled him close as her friends formed a protective circle around her, all vowing to keep the alone away from one who never should feel hurt like that again.
**May the circle be unbroken…**
And that is the end of this fanfic! I hope you all enjoyed it. I ran into a bit of trouble towards the end, but thought I did pretty good. Depression is a serious and dangerous thing, I know this because I have lived through a serious one, but if you have a good net of friends and Usagi did in this story and as I did in real life, then you can work through it. Check out my websites!
Talk to you all tomorrow! ~_^