Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Not Without You: a reimagining of Episode 110 ❯ Part Two: The Agony of Fate ( Chapter 2 )

DISCLAIMER: Obviously, I don't own Sailor Moon or any of her companions. Also, this is intended to use the names and situations from the North American dub, not the original Japanese. Thus, I have used the NA names, not the original names. So please don't get on my case for the use of the NA dub names - that was done deliberately. I actually wrote two versions of this story - one using the original names and relations, the other using the dub names and relations - and prefered this version to the other.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I have taken some creative license because this is how I feel the episode should have played out. Obviously, some of the things that happen here aren't in the anime; they're little plot elements I've thrown in. I've tried to limit it to things that could have happened, had the "camera" stayed in place long enough. As the subtitle of the story suggests, this is a reimagining of this episode: it's my take on how I think the episode should have been, in addition to what it was.

  NOT WITHOUT YOU:
A reimagining of episode 110 (North American dub)
by Joanne Calypso Blessing (sirbartonslady)
first published April 2002 PART TWO: THE AGONY OF FATE

Her steps were heavy as she walked into the apartment. She wanted to crawl into bed and hide for a week. Hide from destiny. She'd always hated destiny and tried to run away from it.

You can't outrun me for I am the Wind! She had spoken thus before; she wanted to shout it again, but her soul now knew better. I am the Wind--but Fate and Destiny exceed the speed of light!

Michelle took things so philosophically, it made her sick sometimes! How could she accept this, a predestined fate, when she possessed such talents as to make the stars themselves weep when she played? Or when she dipped a brush into paint, and created a stunning image mirroring life? Amara herself was no artist. She had only learned piano because it had been thrust on her. She had no love for it, not like Michelle did for the violin. And so her own piano playing served at best only as accompaniment. But she had her own talents and aspirations. Saving the world had never been one of them.

Fatigue dragged at her, raking its fingers across her scalp and through her hair, clinging to her limbs, and clutching at her weary heart. All this searching, and what had happened? The crystals would come to them. Why hadn't they known this all along! All that pain and anguish they could have prevented...

Amara sat herself down by the large window overlooking the city park. Rucking one leg up onto the ledge and propping her elbow against her knee, her hand supporting her chin, Amara descended into a trance.

I am the Wind. I do not hurt. I am the Wind. I do no harm. I am the Wind.

Who am I fooling?

I'm so tired of castles in the air!

The prickle of tears in her eyes came with an unexpected sting. Her eyes had dried a little too much, and the salinity of tears had come with a stinging shock. Amara shook her head, trying to clear away the fuzzy haze that lingered like a dull fog, veiling her from reading her own thoughts clearly.

Uranus. Do not lose hope. I will be with you.

That voice again. A voice Amara felt as if she recognized, though she could hardly put a name to it. It was soft, feminine, sophisticated... and completely hypnotic.

It wasn't Michelle's. It was far too mystic...

Amara felt a sudden chill and crossed her arms to warm herself a little.

After a brief swim in the pool, Michelle still couldn't shake the wretched feeling in her gut. Amara knew something, but wasn't spilling it. And Michelle knew in her heart that whatever it was, Amara was withholding it for Michelle's own sake.

Michelle hadn't had time to tell Amara about the other part of her dream. After the heartsnatching. She'd seen them both die. She'd seen herself die quickly, as if the waters of icy Neptune had traversed the skies and drowned her, freezing her blood quickly and painlessly. But Amara had suffocated, dying slowly as her lungs collapsed. Amara had died a slow, long, pain-wracked death, while Michelle had hardly felt anything.

And then an angel had appeared, holding the Purity Chalice. And a beautiful black-haired woman bathed in an emerald aura had come forth with a garnet orb and with a blast of light, banished the pain.

And then the alarm had gone off, signaling the start of a new day for them both. And that had meant school.

Suffering hour after hour of lectures, her graphite pencils doodling seashells across her notes, Michelle had tried to think of anything but that dream. But it didn't work that way. How silly to think that Amara hadn't noticed.

Immediately after school, while Amara had gone off to find a replace part for her motorcycle, Michelle had tried to alleviate her tensions with a swim. But that hadn't worked, and so she'd finally pulled out the seashell and meditated with it. She still didn't know how long she'd been in an altered state of consciousness. The clock in the pool room wasn't even working right now, so she had no gage for the passage of time.

Time.

Something about Time rang a bell...

Getting out of the pool, Michelle took up her towel, wrapped it around her shoulders and headed for the elevator. She paid little heed to the elevator's other occupants as they came and went en route to their destinations. She focused her mind inwardly, generating an image of sea waves crashing on a beach. Normally this calmed her, but today she could not be calmed. The symbol of Neptune hung in the clouds, suspended between the symbol of Uranus, and another, more obscure symbol... A disembodied voice came wafting over the seafoam, seductively sweet and mystical; Neptune. Trust the Power of the Sea.

She walked into the apartment quietly; she spied Amara sitting in the window sill of the main room. Her eyes were unfocused; her mind was seventeen-hundred-million miles away. She was in orbit with her patron planet. Michelle chose to give Amara her solitude. She was clearly deeply troubled and needed this time to reflect.

Amara became aware of the phone ringing. But she just couldn't get up the energy to answer it, so she let the machine get it. As her gaze drifted back to the window, she saw a beautiful woman's face. Black hair and nearly black eyes, all tinted just slightly emerald green.

Uranus. Trust the Power of the Sky. Trust your planet. I will be with you soon.

Amara closed her eyes as a bolt of pain jolted across her brow.

The answering machine took over and the caller began her message.

"Hello, I believe I've reach Miss Amara Tennoh's house. I'll leave you a message all right!" Amara's skin crawled. That voice-- "Eudial speaking." That hideous laugh-- "Are you surprised? Now that I've found your phone number, it'll be dead easy to find out where you live! Then you'll get another surprise. I've found out who the holder of the pure heart crystal is, and I'll finally get my hands on it!" That laugh again. "Victory now belongs to us--!" the machine cut off the message.

Amara was frozen in place, trying to assimilate the twist. The phone promptly rang again. Amara didn't dare get up. It would be too easy. Let Eudial think she and Michelle weren't home.

The machine picked up.

"The stupid answering machine cut me off before I finished speaking to you. Well nevermind. I'll tell you all now. Anyway, I know the two of you have been looking for the pure heart crystals. If you wanted to, we could join forces for this particular chase. No need to worry, my boss doesn't need to know, it'll be a deal between me and you. Think about it! And we can meet in secret. I'll send you a map of the location by fax. See you then!" the line went dead.

Amara became aware of Michelle standing by the telephone, toweling her hair dry. She was frowning contemplatively. Amara rolled her head slightly, still sagging against the window.

"She's found who has the pure heart crystals," Michelle said softly. For a moment Amara resented the statement of the painfully obvious, but she reminded herself that Michelle was in as much pain as she was.

"Yeah," she sighed heavily. "It confirms my hunch. At last."

Michelle felt the twinge of self-loathing as Amara slowly lifted her own hands to gaze at them.

And so it is. My hands are thus soiled with this mission. I shall never be able to wash the blood from them. My hands will stop at nothing to get the pure heart crystals...

A rush of pure self-hatred blazed for a moment before exhaustion extinguished its flames. Michelle felt a surge of compassion for Amara and she walked over. Amara looked up at her, surprised. "Michelle?"

Michelle reached down and took her hand. "Your hands are not soiled with spilt blood." Leaning forward, Michelle pressed her lips to the back of Amara's hand. "I think you have beautiful hands."

Amara just looked at her, speechless, as she sat down on the ledge of the window as well, lacing her fingers intricately with Amara's. Amara's eyes grew huge, like a deer caught in headlights.

Thus combines the Planetary Twins.

Even Michelle froze at that. She could see in Amara's eyes that it had been shared between them. A third soul spoke to them. Who?

Amara's shoulders heaved suddenly. Michelle put her arms around her partner, extending her ambience to envelope them both.

"We have to do this, Michelle," Amara murmured against her shoulder. Her hands clenched into fists of determination.

"The other Senshi will get in our way, you know. They have this horrible timing," Michelle groomed her fingers through Amara's soft, wispy hair.

"Then we'll just have to make sure they don't." Amara said, abruptly pulling away from Michelle's embrace.

"How?"

"The others transform like we do. But Sailor Moon doesn't--she has a brooch. She can't transform without it."

"Amara! Are you suggesting we should--"

"Yes. Do you have a better idea?"

"But--" Michelle was visibly shaken by the prospect. "Amara, that's wrong!"

"Which would you rather be, wrong or dead? We have a mission to complete. Are you in or out?"

Michelle looked down a moment, then looked up again into Amara's eyes. "I don't like it, but you're right."