Shaman King Fan Fiction ❯ A Gift of Love ❯ Yomigaere (Revive) ( Chapter 45 )

 

“Darn it…Darn it…DARN IT!” Pin-Mei yelled as she slammed her fists on the ground. “I can't believe this!”

 

She was out in the middle of a clearing near the woods. Misty rain fell on her, but that wasn't what was on her mind. Ma-Ying hovered over her.

 

“Mistress…”

 

Rong, Ling, and Shu ran into the clearing to see their master sitting on the ground. She alternated punching the ground with each of her fists, her head bowed in shame. It wasn't in a spoiled, bratty type of manner, but one that showed utter disappointment and contempt with herself. They rushed over to her.

 

“Milady,” Rong said kneeling beside her. “What is it?”

 

“…I lost…” she whispered hoarsely.

 

The three guards looked stunned. “What?”

 

“I LOST! I couldn't even land one blow on the stupid officiant- so I can't be in the Shaman Fights! I failed! I suck! I absolutely suck! I trained so hard! I wanted to impress him! I wanted him to see that I could be a good shaman too! I…I wanted him to notice me…”

 

The two other girls knelt beside her also and wrapped their arms around her.

 

“Don't worry about what he'll think about you,” Rong said, her tone holding a hint of jealous defiance. “He should commend you for having the courage to try. It's not easy to gather the courage to take on the shamans of the world like that. Not every shaman is participating in this. If he berates you, he's just not worth--,”

 

“You don't understand!” Pin-Mei cried. “It was all he'd talk about whenever I mentioned being a shaman! He couldn't wait for this! Why would he want to be around a weak girl like me? I can't even help him with the thing most important to him! Compared to him, I might as well be a regular human!”

 

Rong seethed with anger. She grabbed her shoulders and looked her in the eye.

 

“Don't you dare compare yourself to him!” she yelled. “He's so cold! Heartless even! He was so nasty to you when you were last over there! He didn't care about you. You were so nice to him, so sweet. But he never gave that same kindness to you. You're polar opposites- you're nothing alike!”

 

Pin-Mei looked at her, tears in her eyes. She was shaking her head slowly. “You're wrong. We are alike. We were both sad. We both were forced to do things we didn't want to do. People hated us. We had no friends. We…we…just wanted people to see us for who we really were…And we gave each other that chance at one point or another.”

 

A blush formed on her cheeks.

 

“And besides…I really really like him.”

 

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“I'm so excited! We're leaving in three days!”

 

Pin-Mei hopped around the room, putting things suitcases and pausing sometimes to look at the picture of her and Ren on her bureau. She'd smile at it and continue hopping. Ling and Shu watched her with amused smiles. Rong was folding her arms and pretending to ignore her. Suddenly, the phone rang.

 

“I'll get it!!” Pin-Mei hopped over to the phone and picked it up. “Hello? Oh hi, Ran! I'm so—What? Oh. Oh I see. No, no, it's alright. I understand. Don't worry about it. Yeah, some other time. Thanks for calling. Bye.”

 

They watched her as she put the phone down, her shoulders drooping.

 

“What is it?” Ling asked.

 

She turned to face them, trying to smile. “We can unpack the suitcases. We won't be needing them.”

 

“Wait, why?”

 

“Ran said there are family problems right now and I shouldn't be there…So that's that…”

 

Ling and Shu looked at her sympathetically. “Lady Pin-Mei…”

 

“I'm fine…really.”

 

“Um…You're crying.”

 

“Huh?” She touched her cheek and realized Shu was right. “Oh, allergies…Darn those lilies…Haha…”

 

Rong walked over and began wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. “Don't lie to us. We've known you long enough to be able to see right through you. You're upset.” She reluctantly picked up Lián and handed him to her. “Now take the proxy plushie and go cry.”

 

She did.

 

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“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!”

 

Pin-Mei blushed as her father, along with her maidservants, sat around the dining table, a chocolate cake in front of her. She smiled and looked to her right at a picture of Hua she had placed on the table.

 

“Thank you mom.”

 

There was a moment of silence. Pin-Mei looked up at Zhang.

 

“Oh Daddy…don't cry…”

 

He turned his head away from her. “I'm not crying.”

 

“At least now we know where she gets her stubbornness from!” Ling cried. The table laughed.

 

They had cake and Pin-Mei opened a few presents; clothes and an angel plushie from her father and all three maidservants chipped in to get her a new copy of her favorite book, as well as a large white plush seal.

 

“I have one last surprise for you, Pin-Mei,” Zhang said as the servants were beginning to clean up.

 

“What is it?”

 

He sat down on a nearby sofa and patted his knee, signaling her to sit on it. She happily complied.

 

“Well,” he said. “I recently spoke to Ran.”

 

Her eyes lit up. “You did?!”

 

He smiled and nodded. “Yes. We decided that you and I would visit them for Ren's 16th birthday. He doesn't know about it, so I guess you could say that you're a special present for him.”

 

She giggled, but then her smile faded. “But what if something happens again like all the other times…?”

 

“It's set in stone. No changing it. It'll happen for sure this time. I promise.”

 

There was a moment of silence. Then Pin-Mei shrieked. Zhang flinched and tried to cover his ears, but Pin-Mei threw her arms around his neck before he could do so.

 

“Kyaaaaaaa!! Thank you Daddy! Thank you so much!! This is the best present ever!”

 

He smiled. “I'm not finished yet.”

 

She blinked. “There's more?”

 

He nodded. “Before you were even born, your mother called Ran, knowing she had had Ren a little over a year before. She requested that the two of you be married. Ran agreed, and so I later brought you over there so we could see how the two of you got along, since Ran questioned Ren's ability to accept others. He did better than the both of us expected. So it was decided that the engagement would go as planned. This visit is important because it will give the both of you time to get to know each other again…and hopefully fall in love.”

 

Pin-Mei just stared at him. “You mean…the reason I got to meet him at all was for just this purpose?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And this is for real? No joke?”

 

“No joke.”

 

He could feel her body get hotter as a deep blush covered her face. She was staring dumbly, trying to take it all in. The Ren who had saved her thrice, who had noticed her and allowed her to follow him around, who had given her Ma-Ying, who had allowed her to sleep with him since the night she went into his room…she was going to marry that person…

 

A small smile formed. “Thank you…that…makes me so happy.”

 

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“Please! Teach me how to cook!”

 

“What?”

 

“Please! I want to be a good wife!”

 

The chef stared at her. There was a desperate, pleading look on her face that was hard to ignore. He finally sighed. “Alright, but you have to do everything I say. Don't complain, and don't get in the way when I make my meals. One chance. Don't blow it.”

 

“Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!”

 

This is how it was after her birthday. Pin-Mei ran around the castle to ask servants and others in town to teach her how to do their trades; all in the name of becoming the perfect wife. Soon enough, she offered to cook for her father when the servants were away and she was able to heal Lián when he tore a limb.

 

`I'll show him…that I'm good enough to be his wife.'

 

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Hua walked to her daughter's body as Jun, Anna, and Manta rushed by her. She looked back and saw Ren on the ground, but tried to tell herself that he was all right, and continued on her way.

 

When she reached her, she placed hands over Pin-Mei's chest wound. When she lifted them a minute later, it was healed. She took Kai's talisman and pressed it against her forehead. With a flash of light, Pin-Mei's soul was pushed out of Hua's body.

 

She quickly turned her head and coughed, allowing blood to fall to the floor. Now, her body was only being held together by Ma-Ying's spirit. Pin-Mei's soul had been the thing that kept the imperfect body together. She could feel her health failing already.

 

She shook it off and took her daughter's soul in her arms. Gently, she laid it back into the lifeless body.

 

A few seconds passed. Suddenly, Pin-Mei bolted upright, gasping for air. She put her hand on her chest, checking her heartbeat. She looked around frantically, her eyes widening when they fell on Hua.

 

“M…Mother?”

 

Hua smiled. “That's right.”

 

Pin-Mei stared at her, her eyes welling up with tears. She suddenly threw herself at her.

 

“MOM!” she cried. Hua held her tightly, doing the one thing she had longed to do since she knew of her pregnancy.

 

They parted, and Pin-Mei looked around the room. She spotted the group that had congregated in its center.

 

“What's going on?”

 

She stood and saw Ren's shirt flutter to the ground. Slowly, she stooped to pick it up. Clutching it, she quickly made her way over. As she neared them, she saw Ren's head resting on his sister's lap. She stared at him.

 

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“What's wrong with Ren?”

 

Everyone looked up at her, her hair down and out of her usual braids. Their eyes widened. HoroHoro pointed at her with a shaky finger.

 

“You…”

 

Rong jumped up and ran over to hug her. Pin-Mei stayed still.

 

“I have no idea how this happened, but I'm glad to see that you're alive! I missed you so much!”

 

Pin-Mei wouldn't reply. She just stared over Rong's shoulder.

 

“Ren…”

 

Rong let her go and stepped out of her way, knowing now wasn't the time to celebrate. Pin-Mei stiffly walked over and fell to her knees in front of Ren's body. She held her hands out and Jun allowed her to take the body and hold it close to her. He was heavy, and she laughed nervously.

 

“Ren, you muscle-bound jerk…I can hardly move you like this…You could help me a little bit, you know?” She shook him gently. “You're supposed to wake up before me, remember? You're the morning person…not me…” He wasn't talking. “I'll put more stickers on your Kwan Dao if you don't wake up! I'll do it, I really will!!”

 

Everyone stared at her. Jun started crying again. Pin-Mei started shaking. This wasn't real, was it?

 

“I don't like blood, you know…so you should have cleaned yourself off before going to bed…You like being clean, don't you? DON'T YOU???”

 

The tears began falling from her eyes.

 

“Ren, this wasn't how it was supposed to be…I was supposed to die- not you! You have a family! You have responsibilities! You can't just peace it like this! Who's going to continue your family? I bet there's a lot of milk in the fridge that will go to waste since you usually drink it all. Your equipment is going to get dusty, you know…”

 

“Don't cry so much. You're much prettier when you smile.”

 

The shaking got worse. She was beginning to lose it. “You…You…YOU IDIOT!! YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT!! You can't leave me like this! You're all I have left! Everyone else is gone…so you can't go too…it's…it's not nice…”

 

“Hey, don't go back to sleep.” “But even if I do, you'll stay here beside me, right?” He smiled. “Of course.”

 

She started shaking her head.

 

“You can't be dead, Ren…you can't…you…you're so strong…Strong people like you aren't supposed to die…No…It's…You're…This…No…No…NO! !”

 

“Why, do you think, I'm going to do this?” He tilted her head up and kissed her.

 

She clutched his body close to her and screamed. “REN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” She cried into his shoulder. “Ren…”

 

She let the corpse slide to the ground. She grabbed her head and continued screaming. Her eyes were wide in horror, she was gasping for air, she continued shaking her head, she refused to believe this.

 

“I don't want to be without you.”

 

“Why did I have to come back if he was going to die???!!!” she screamed. “I want to die again! I just want to die!”

 

Everyone hid their weapons.

 

“Honey…”

 

Pin-Mei looked to her right to see her mother smiling. “THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!” she screamed.

 

Hua ignored her and slapped her across the face. Her daughter grabbed her cheek in pain.

 

“Don't EVER wish to die,” she said firmly. “It's a foolish wish, and it will only insult those who had their lives taken from them.”

 

Pin-Mei calmed down slightly and looked at Ren again.

 

“I want to show you how much I love you…someday.”

 

“You…You don't understand…He was my world…He was the only reason I wanted to live…He was the only reason I tried so hard to be a shaman…He was the only one who noticed me…He was the only one who cared…He never asked for anything from me…He didn't care about sex or anything like that…He gave me so much…Taught me so much…He protected me…He made me laugh…He was so warm…He let me sleep beside him…He made me feel special…He…He…was the only person other than Father to tell me they loved me…”

 

She clenched her fists on her knees and stared at the ground. “Ren is the only reason why I am who I am. He changed me. If it wasn't for him, I would…I'd be just like Suo…Angry, bitter and alone…I wouldn't have a heart at all…It's because I met him ten years ago that I was able to be happy, and be as nice to people as I could…He was the only one who could make the hurt go away…But now that he's gone…it hurts even more…”

 

Yoh looked at her fists. Blood was trickling from them and onto her skirt. He could tell that something in her was building, and sooner or later, it was going to come out. Explode.

 

“I thought…I would finally be able to get my way…That I would be happy…” she whispered through her tears. “I thought our love would be so beautiful…I thought we could turn the darkness into light…But we…I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong…but still…my heart tells me…we were right…”

 

Yoh tilted his head sadly. “Pin-Mei…”

 

Every one looked at her. She just continued staring at the ground, not saying a word.

 

Suddenly, she ripped her halter off.

 

After a moment of shock, the girls scrambled to cover the male eyes (Anna decided slapping Yoh to the ground was easier). Pin-Mei ripped her skirt off as well, her black pants still on.

 

“What the hell??” HoroHoro cried. “This is NOT the time to strip, Pin-Mei!”

 

“SHUT UP HOROHORO!” she yelled at him.

 

Rong stared at her. It had been so long since she had heard her yell. The last time would have been a tantrum when she was four. She watched Pin-Mei throw the shirt to the ground and look at Ren's. After clutching it, she opened it and put it on.

 

It was big on her, and she pulled the strings as tight as they would go. Satisfied, she produced four yellow clips and began clipping them into her hair. Suo watched her curiously. Her granddaughter's back was to her.

 

“Ren lived a hard life,” Pin-Mei said as she snapped the first clip in, not looking up. “He felt guilty for the bad things he had done. He was searching for peace. Even though he never said it, I could tell. I was hoping I could help him find that peace. I wanted to make him happy. Forever. I wanted to wake up next to him until the day I would sleep forever. I was happy. I think he was too. No…I know he was. I can say that without feeling pompous. I made him happy. And that made me happy. I loved him more than anything. I would do anything for him, no matter what.”

 

“Here, I brought you some milk.” He patted her. “Thanks. I know I can always count on you for that.”

 

“But now, you've taken him away from me. From us. You forced him to have his life taken away.”

 

She snapped the last clip in and messed up her bangs. Jun's eyes widened. Her hair was fashioned to imitate her brother's. She was a shorter, feminine version of him. Even her stance reminded her of him. That stance of silent anger, which soon turned to one of pride and determination.

 

“Ever since I met him, I was able to smile when things went wrong. I never got angry. Just sad…”

 

“If any of you dirty bastards even THINK about touching her, I will make sure you regret it.”

 

“But now, Suo, for the first time in my entire life…”

 

“I love you. I always will. No matter what happens, I promise I'll always love you!”

 

She turned around, her eyes piercing her grandmother's soul like they used to when she was a small child. Her face was creased in anger. Her voice was sharp and low.

 

“I'M REALLY FUCKING PISSED!!!!!”