Exposed

Part 1

by Xellas M.

The sunlight sparkled brilliantly as it danced over the black and gold scales of the two large groups of dragons that had assembled deep within Dragon Valley. A historic meeting was taking place. For the first time a young group of Ryuzoku had united to challenge the old order. The young dragons were led by a beautiful and charismatic female named Mirelle. They wanted to take advantage of the recent losses sustained by the Mazoku and launch an all-out offensive. This group argued that since the Mazoku needed suffering to survive, a great deal of suffering would be prevented by reducing the number of demons with a quick, clean attack. The young ones claimed that no race had the right to inflict pain on others, even for survival. Their elders, on the other hand, held vivid memories from the War of the Monsters' Fall and knew that no such battle could ever be quick or clean. Led by Milgasia, they argued for peace.

The argument lasted for months. In the end the Ryuzoku were irreconcilably divided. True to their peaceful nature, only good wishes were exchanged when Mirelle and her group left the Valley of Dragons and relocated to the rebuilt Temple of the Fire Dragon King.

Once there, Mirelle slowly shaped the minds of her isolated little group until their original good intentions became twisted. Instead of planning a surgical strike to benefit all living creatures, they began planning assassinations, vengeance against the Monsters. If Mirelle had personal reasons for selecting the first targets, Xellos and his Mistress Beastmaster Xellas, no one dared ask.

* * * * *

Xellos and Zelgadis had been traveling together for nearly six months when they reached a small, ordinary house outside of a village in what had been the Kingdom of Xoana. Rumor had it that Rezo had once stayed there as a guest after opening the eyes of the son of the house. Now it stood uninhabited, a victim of the chaos that had followed the fall of the ruling family. Zelgadis marched straight through the front door, kicked it down and marched in.

Xellos sighed and floated to a perch on the low roof. Six months they had been traveling and Zelgadis had still not recovered from his capture. If anything, he seemed to be getting worse. He wore his ivory face mask to sleep at night, refusing to remove it even to eat if anyone - including Xellos - was around. His obsession with finding a cure now occupied his every waking thought and nothing Xellos said or did could distract him.

Things were different between them now. Instead of rewarding Xellos' more irritating behavior by punching him, Zelgadis usually ignored the poor Mazoku entirely. Many times Xellos tried to just give up and leave. The demon would teleport away, only to find that leaving simply removed whatever small comfort the physical presence of the chimera provided. Depressed, the priest always returned and the brief smile of acknowledgement Zelgadis would give him almost made it all seem worthwhile. It was humiliating.

Loud crashing noises were coming from within the building. Gradually they built up to a crescendo, ending with Zelgadis marching through the wreckage of the doorway, arms empty and eyes blazing scarlet. He stopped, exhaled, turned to face the house and extended his arm. In a voice of utter calm he spoke a single word:

"Fireball!"

* * * * *

The blast itself took off the entire front wall of the building. Just before the second floor became the first, Xellos spotted a small animal trapped behind a piece of furniture and trying desperately to wiggle it's way out. In the last instant, he teleported over, grabbed the struggling animal and brought it to safety.

It was a kitten. A tiny, fluffy, adorable, powder blue kitten with tightly closed eyes. Xellos phased in behind Zelgadis and gently set it on the shaman's shoulder. Apparently this was a very comfortable perch. The kitten immediately began purring loudly and rubbing his face against the surprised chimera's pointed ear.

"You should be more careful, Zelgadis-san. Another minute and the lives of countless rats and fish would have been saved."

Zelgadis blinked. "Since when do Mazoku rescue kittens from burning buildings?"

"Since you became willing to let them die."

"What the hell do you mean by that?" Zelgadis snapped. After all, he was a heartless, magical swordsman; what did the fate of a small kitten have to do with him? That blast was nothing compared to the damage Lina had been known to cause.

"Destroying that house was pointless. It isn't going to help you reach your goal, so why did you do it?" Xellos finally had the chimera's attention. "Do you honestly feel any better about yourself now?"

"How dare you! How can you possibly know what it's like?"

"So take off that ridiculous mask and tell me. Stop being such a coward."

Zelgadis was at a complete loss for words so he walked forward and slapped Xellos across the face, hard. The kitten jumped from it's perch, glared at the men, and curled up to sleep on Zel's pack. "Hypocrite." the shaman spat out when he could finally speak.

"Excuse me?" The rich voice was soft, threatening.

"You heard me. At least I have a reason for wearing my mask. You paste on that idiot's smile of yours and play games. If it's not because you are afraid then why do it, Xellos?"

Xellos opened his eyes and glared daggers at the chimera.

Zelgadis continued, recklessly. "Oh and that works even better, I'm sure. If they can't be tricked, frighten them."

"I'll do more than frighten you if you're not careful, Zelgadis-san. I was only trying to help."

"I don't need your help, Xellos. Why don't you just go? You aren't wanted."

Silence fell. Zelgadis tried to tell himself that the Mazoku couldn't be looking *hurt*. Since when did anything the shaman have to say ever make a difference with that infuriating demon anyway?

Xellos left, but couldn't resist a final word. "I will go. Maybe I will stop by Hell on my way back and visit Rezo. I'm sure he'd be very proud of his grandson, following in his footsteps and all. Ja ne!"

"Good riddance." Zelgadis remarked to the empty air.

"Meow!" said the kitten, opening its eyes. They were a very familiar shade of purple.

"Oh, shut up."

* * * * *

Xellos had nowhere to go. He wasn't ready to face his Mistress just yet, so he teleported to the same cabin he and Zelgadis had occupied six months previously. He was depressed, exhausted and did not have the control necessary to set up the spells to guarantee privacy before he collapsed and silently watched his own tears fall to the floor.

He had known this would eventually happen but that didn't make it hurt any less. Zelgadis despised him and probably would be disgusted if he learned the true extent of the trickster's feelings. Hell, Xellos was disgusted with himself. Self-pity would not change anything. He sat up and dried his eyes.

A shadow outside the window flittered away and left.

* * * * *

Zelgadis continued his journey alone. Well, not quite alone - nothing he had said or done had been able to convince the little kitten to stay behind. It rode on his shoulder, or in his pack and curled up in his sleeping roll at night.

The argument with Xellos bothered him more than he would have imagined. Every single day since his rescue, the demon's offer echoed through the chimera's mind. 'Friendship, or more if you want it.'

In agreeing to travel with the demon, the shaman had been forced to let go of the illusion of hatred that had protected him from his real feelings for the Mazoku. It had been so much easier before, when he had simply hated what he didn't feel worthy of having. Now, Zelgadis could no longer deny that "more" was exactly what he wanted, what he had always wanted. Still, the chimera knew that he must have misunderstood the priest. Zelgadis could barely look at himself, why would Xellos want to be with him?

Every night the question would hover on his stone lips and every night he would choke it back, afraid. The need to find his cure became overwhelming, for only after he found it would he be able to approach Xellos. It reached the point where Zelgadis could barely stand to look at the demon for fear the perceptive Mazoku would finally figure him out and leave. In the end the chimera had been unable to deal with his own insecurity and had pushed his tormentor away just to get it over with.

It didn't work. The pain only grew worse once he was alone. He kept waiting and hoping the priest would return, jumping at the slightest shadow. Finally, one night several weeks after his fight with Xellos, Zelgadis was awakened from his restless sleep by a strange weight on his chest. Opening his eyes he stared straight up into a pair of slitted amethyst eyes gleaming softly in the moonlight. His breath caught and just for a split second an overwhelming feeling of joy coursed through the shaman. Then a set of soft whiskers tickled the stones on his cheek, bringing him back to reality with a resounding crash. He heard footsteps approaching his fire. Himitsu jumped smoothly from his chest and sat in front of the fire, delicately grooming a paw and looking very satisfied with his performance as watch-kitty.

Zelgadis jumped up and readied his sword.

"Who's there?" His voice was harsh, his stance threatening. There was no way he was going to risk being captured again.

"I mean no harm! Please, put down your weapon." A female voice that sounded like sunshine and honey danced through the night to the surprised shaman.

Zelgadis was less than trusting. "Come out where I can see you!"

"Very well." The stranger moved forward and Zelgadis barely suppressed a gasp of surprise at the unexpected vision of beauty. The woman was at least Zelgadis' height, possibly taller, her long honey colored hair rippling down to a tiny waist. Her features were full of force and character, just short enough of perfection to be interesting.

Confronted with such beauty in face and form, Zelgadis became even more aware of his perceived ugliness. Grateful for the mask that hid his features from the vision before him, he shrank back even further into the shadows before speaking. Embarrassment made his speech much rougher than politeness called for, but he did lower his sword. "Who are you and what do you want?"

"Zelgadis Graywords, I would like you to do a service for me. In exchange, I will offer you a cure." The woman continued walking toward Zelgadis, who remained frozen. The strange lady's graceful movements became sinuous and predatory. Finally, Zelgadis thought to raise his sword, but it was too late. She opened her mouth impossibly wide and from her open jaws a thick beam of light emerged.

'Beautiful' was Zelgadis' last coherent thought as the light struck him.

* * * * *

A single stool with a harsh light hung directly over it stood in the center of a darkened room. Zelgadis sat on the chair, naked. He struggled to recall the simple spell that would bring light into the room, but the knowledge seemed to slip away every time he tried to remember. He tried to remember how he had gotten there but couldn't.

The fact that none of this bothered him made him realize that he was dreaming.

- - - - -

Just as he was about to try to wake up, he found himself hovering in a clear blue sky. Hundreds of feet below, Zelgadis could see the top of a blanket of fluffy white clouds that completely covered the earth. Directly in front of him a large dark mass was approaching very rapidly. When it drew closer, Zelgadis began to make out the distinct shapes of many dragons in battle formation. A soft sound made the shaman turn his head. About one hundred feet to his right Xellos was patiently waiting. The dragons came closer and Zelgadis could practically taste the evil joy radiating from Xellos as he lifted his hand and made a simple slicing gesture. Explosions rippled throughout the ranks of dragons and as each fell it was as if the chimera had lost a friend. He could not only name every single one of the fallen, but could remember habits and quirks of personalities as well. The thin air carried Xellos' laugh to his ears and he hated the Mazoku for it.

Just then, a plaintive "Meow" temporarily blocked out the sound of Xellos' mocking laughter, breaking the spell.

"These are not my memories!" shouted Zelgadis to no one in particular.

- - - - -

Back in the dark room.

"Mazoku know nothing but pain, that one in particular. Whole families died that day." It was a very distinctive female voice speaking, one Zelgadis had heard before, but where?

"It was a war. If he hadn't been the stronger he would have been the one dead. There is nothing wrong with doing what you must to survive."

"Quit trying to justify his actions. It was excessive, vicious and he enjoyed it." The golden voice took on an irritable edge.

"The dragons attacked first." Zelgadis pointed out softly. It was time to end this dream.

- - - - -

Zelgadis struggled to wake up. Opening his eyes, he found himself nestled comfortably in Xellos' arms, as safe and warm as he had been the day the genki priest had pulled him out of the iron cage. Sighing with relief, he started to gently move one of Xellos' arms so he could sit up. To his surprise he found himself pulled roughly back.

"Going somewhere, koi?" Xellos' voice was like ice. His gloved hand traced the lines of the chimera's body in a manner that somehow managed to convey the idea that Zelgadis was nothing but a toy, and a cheap one at that.

"Xellos, what? Stop! Not like this…"

"You've caused me a lot of trouble. Now you're going to open that ugly face of yours and make up for it. Physically."

Zelgadis froze for a moment, betrayed and completely stricken. Deep inside of him, a small uncertain voice told him to just give in, to comply, that this was all he was or ever would be worth. As always in response to that voice a rage grew within him, drowning out everything else until, unexpectedly, he was distracted by a familiar light blue kitten purring near Xellos' feet.

- - - - -

Suddenly, he was back in the dark room. Apparently he had never managed to awaken after all. This time his arms were chained behind his back and he was surrounded by a sensation of disapproval, of rejection. He could not tell who or what was rejecting him, only that it felt female somehow. Without being told he became aware that it was his affection for Xellos that caused the changed circumstances, that it was perverted and wrong for him to fantasize about the priest.

"He'll hurt you. He will hurt you and he will laugh." Before Zelgadis could locate the source of the voice, reality again shifted.

- - - - -

Scene after scene, image after image assaulted the chimera. He was insulted, ignored, betrayed, tormented and debased by Xellos. One central theme remained: it was the Mazoku's fault that he felt ashamed of his stone body. He was told repeatedly that these dreams would set him free of this shame, if only he would trust Mirelle, the goddess-like Ryuzoku who was touching his mind.

It was a fierce battle that raged for an incalculable amount of time. In the end, Zelgadis desperately hid every undefiled memory of Xellos including his love for the trickster priest deeply within his psyche. It wasn't until he had to fight to prevent his feelings from being forcibly ripped away that he finally realized how very strong they were. Zelgadis would have died to protect the love he felt had it been an option. Instead, he made sure that nothing but a shell would remain when it was finally finished.

* * * * *

The morning sunlight streaming in through his window threatened to awaken Zelgadis from the best sleep he'd had in ages. Mumbling, he turned over in the soft bed only to roll back in alarm as a loud "MEOW!" screech sounded in his ear and a little blue ball of fur went zooming by, claws scrabbling across his stone chest as the startled cat made a break for it.

Frowning slightly, Zelgadis rose and made his way to the bath. Fragments of the previous evening's dream percolated through his conscious mind. He had a brief image of himself dressed in his old heavy cloak and mask and carrying a sword…and Xellos… Shrugging away a strange feeling of longing, he groomed and dressed himself carefully. After all, he had a meeting with the lovely Mirelle that afternoon and he had to look his best.

The meeting took place at a small, intimate Zefelian restaurant on the edge of town. Zelgadis was already seated and sipping his coffee when Mirelle entered. All activity in the place temporarily halted as she gracefully slinked in and took her seat. She was flanked by two bodyguards, big men who sat on either side of her trying to pass as her friends. A moment of silence passed as the restaurant held it's breath, an undercurrent of fear pervading the place.

Mirelle sat down smoothly, ordering tea from the waiter who'd jumped to take her order. "Konichiwa, Zelgadis-san. You are looking well today."

"Thank you, my Lady. I am anxious to hear how I can be of service to you."

"I only wish we could have offered the complete cure you were looking for, Zelgadis-san. Still, your current body is quite attractive, not to mention powerful." Something possessive flickered in the tall woman's midnight gaze.

"You have done better than that in teaching me to see myself the way others see me, Lady. You took away my pain. Nothing I can do for you could ever be enough."

"There is something..." she began, but let her voice trail off.

"Anything." Zelgadis said without hesitation.

"I couldn't possibly. It just wouldn't be right to ask, especially not of you. Forget I mentioned it." Mirelle nervously fiddled with the delicate china teacup in her hand.

Zelgadis became deeply concerned. Here was the woman who had helped him, who had saved him and he was unable to help her when she needed him most. "Please?"

A slight pause and then, as if convinced of the chimera's sincerity, she began. "Yesterday afternoon, two members of our patrol returned with evidence that the Mazoku are planning to take advantage of our losses by attacking. The driving force behind the plot is your old boyfriend Xellos." Mirelle watched Zelgadis carefully as he took in this information. "I have a spell that can capture him but it takes time to cast and is easily detected. What we need is something to divert his attention until we're ready."

"That makes sense. When do I attack him?" Zelgadis reached automatically for his sword, stopping only when he remembered he no longer needed to carry one.

"An attack won't work. No offense, but the battle would not last nearly long enough. This will take another type of…distraction. Your past relationship with Xellos makes you the only person capable of approaching him this way. I understand if it's too painful for you, if you still have feelings for him."

Zelgadis shuddered in revulsion. "No! I feel nothing for that creature. I would rather have fought him even if it meant death, but I will do what I have to." A wave of nausea swept over him while his unconscious mind played back the images of pain and humiliation he had been forced to endure as part of his cure. He swallowed. At least this way no one else would ever be deceived by the Trickster's false smile.

* * * * *

Mirelle slowly let out the breath she hadn't realized she had been holding. Success! Xellos was as good as hers and once she had Xellos she would have Xellas as well. Careful to hide the eager smile that threatened to break out across her face, she leaned closer to Zelgadis to give him more specific instructions.

* * * * *

Everything was finally ready. Zelgadis had received hours of training in the sensual arts. Spells were in place to hide the shaman's feelings from Xellos, as well as to relax and prepare the chimera for anything the Mazoku might demand. Zelgadis sat and listened to his heart pound for a few minutes, stalling. Here it was, his first time and it would be with someone he despised, someone who would probably hurt him. He still had no idea why Mirelle was so sure he'd be able to get Xellos into bed anyway, maybe she was wrong and he would fail.

Zelgadis could only hope.

He suddenly thought of Himitsu, wishing the kitten were there to keep him company and console him. Still, he knew Mirelle would be scrying them so he wouldn't be completely alone. He glanced at the water clock in the corner of the room.

It was time. Concentrating intently on the summoning as he had been taught, Zelgadis called out softly "Xellos."

He waited a few seconds then repeated "Xellos, where are you? I need you."

"What do you want, Zelgadis-san?" The trickster's voice, completely neutral, came from directly behind the chimera's left ear. Zelgadis could feel the priest's breath on his neck but did not turn around. Instead, he looked down at his hands folded in his lap.

"I need to apologize, Xellos. You were right to have left, what I said was unforgivable. I couldn't even live with myself at the time so I lashed out at you." The chimera repeated his lessons verbatim, focusing all his efforts on not letting slip the fear and revulsion that was coursing through him due to the priest's proximity. Just because Xellos would not be able to taste his hatred did not mean the Mazoku was blind as well. He prayed to anyone listening for the strength to get through the next hour.

Xellos sighed. "It wasn't unforgivable, Zelgadis-san. I just wish I knew what it is you want from me." Gloved hands rested lightly on the trembling chimera's shoulders.

Could it be this easy? "I told you, I need to apologize." Zelgadis said, finally turning around and capturing Xellos' lips in his own. Keeping his blue eyes squeezed tightly shut, Zelgadis kissed the priest forcefully. He felt Xellos start before strong arms enfolded him and began returning the kiss, deepening it.

Zelgadis had been prepared for the wave of revulsion that swept through him. What he had not expected was the intense pleasure that accompanied it. His body simply refused to perceive Xellos as a threat despite the agonized warnings of his mind. That was actually a good thing, Zelgadis reminded himself as he began nipping along the priest's jaw line. It didn't matter how skillful the chimera was, if he had not gotten aroused Xellos would have known something was up. But if it was such a good thing, then why did it make Zelgadis so ashamed?

Stalling, moving as slowly as he could without risking conversation, Zelgadis began removing Xellos' clothing, bringing every bit of knowledge he'd been taught into play to keep the priest from taking the initiative and hurting him. Not that that seemed likely. the demon's human body was relaxed, except for certain strategic areas. His beautiful face when Zelgadis stole peeks of it was softened in ecstasy. The Mazoku's hands began to wander, doing things to the shaman that increased both his pleasure and his disgust, his whole body becoming tense with the need to run away, or to throw up, or to…

Suddenly, the Mazoku stopped. "What's wrong?" Tenderly, the demon caressed his lover's cheek, capturing one of many tears the chimera hadn't realized he'd shed.

"It's alright." Zelgadis answered, his throat inexplicably tight. He didn't think he could stand it if the filthy Mazoku touched him again, so he slid his still somewhat clothed body down along Xellos' bare skin until his lips brushed the priest's erect member. Sneaking a glance up, the water clock told him he still had what seemed like an eternity before this was over. One last deep, shaky breath and he engulfed the demon, opening his throat and managing to take him entirely in his mouth.

The sudden assault was too much for the trickster; he gasped and arched his back, rocking his hips slightly in a silent plea for the chimera to continue. Zelgadis deliberately took his time, touching and teasing the heated demon until the clock struck.

Several things happened at once: Zelgadis drew back his head as Xellos came, warm fluid striking his cheek. The door to the room burst open and several Ryuzoku burst in. Xellos, though he would not realize it for another heartbeat, was completely vulnerable, unable to spellcast or teleport, due to Mirelle's spell.

Zelgadis wiped at his face, disgusted. Spots of shame appeared on his cheeks. He knew he looked like a whore, standing there half dressed and still visibly aroused with come dripping from his face. Of course, a whore was exactly what he now was - good cause or no good cause.

His thoughts were confirmed almost immediately, for once the area was secured one of the soldiers gave him a smirk as she reached down and patted his ass. "Maybe if you're nice I will let you do the same for me." the Ryuzoku offered.

"Since when are you into fucking lower life forms? Hentai!" one of her buddies called out. The entire group laughed.

Xellos spoke, very quietly. "If you touch him again, I will not allow you to die." He looked at his chimera, concerned. "It will be alright, Zel-kun."

The Ryuzoku soldier laughed. "You still don't get it, do you? Allow me to explain. Even the chimera doesn't care for your kind. You've been set up."

"That's enough!" A new voice called out sharply, but it was too late. Xellos looked at Zelgadis and saw that it was true. In that instant the Mazoku's heart broke.

* * * * *

~End Part 1