Title: Light My Fire

Author: Yugure

Genre: Humor/Romance - Z/L

Rated: PG-13

Disclaimer: I don't own Slayers or the characters. I don't own the song "Light My Fire" or "High Pressure"; they are songs belonging to TM Revolution. I do, however, own my brain. I think.

Author Notes: Here's chapter 2. Enjoy. Please R/R and let me know what you think of this story/chapter/whatever. Oh, and Zelgadis has black hair/blue eyes and Lina has red hair/green eyes because blue hair and red eyes don't come by naturally, and this story takes place in modern times.

Chapter 2 - High Pressure

Monday. It was Monday; not a day Zelgadis particularly liked. Especially after the "incident". Unfortunately, Zelgadis had no control over time, and Monday came like it always eventually did. It had been a month since the "incident", and Zelgadis had not stepped one foot outside of his apartment. But today… today was going to be different.

Today, Zelgadis was going to face his fears and leave.

Oh, sure, he had much trepidation. It took him at least an hour just to convince himself that he needed to do it. It took another hour to decide it had to be today. After finding absolutely no coffee anywhere in his kitchen, his mind was made up: He HAD to do it.

Zelgadis shrugged into an oversize coat and pulled a baseball cap over his beautiful black hair. Adding a pair of shades and grabbing his wallet, Zelgadis was ready to go. He looked over at the tabby cat lying on his couch. The tabby had also been stuck in the apartment for four weeks. Zelgadis really was not a fan of cats, but because he was terrified at the thought of opening his door AND seeing Mrs. Olley (who, as you should already have guessed, was a woman not quite past her prime…), he had to put up with the sulky feline.

"Well, Cat, here I go," he muttered, addressing the tabby with his surrogate name. The cat simply rolled over into a shaft of sunlight. Zelgadis took a deep breath, closed his hand on the doorknob, and yanked the door open.

Nothing awaited him.

Zelgadis peered into the hallway, scouting the area for any lurkers. This had happened before. During the first few days of being a prisoner in his own apartment, Zelgadis tried to leave a couple times. Using the stairs, he never made it past the next floor. The time he tried the elevator, he was met by an insanely large group of women in the lobby. Trust me when I say you don't want the details of that particular encounter.

"The coast is clear…" he whispered to himself. He closed his door behind him quietly and kept the keys in his hand in case he needed to make a quick retreat. Surreptitiously, Zelgadis crept down the hallway. He frequently spun on his heels, jumping at any sound that reached his ears. Maybe, just maybe, he'd make it this time. The elevators beckoned him on as they sat peacefully at the end of the corridor.

"Hey, you!"

The female voice seemed so loud and close in the quiet hallway Zelgadis felt his heart literally stop for a few moments. Whirling around and bringing up his hands in defense, Zelgadis fell down and backed himself up until he hit the wall.

"Please have mercy!" he said. "I'm too young to die!"

"… What the hell is your problem?" The speaker's voice oozed with disdain. Zelgadis peered up from beneath the brim of his baseball cap as a slender female crouched down in front of him. He cringed in fear. "I'm not going to kill you, for goodness' sake. I need your help."

"My… what?" Zelgadis stammered. He stared into the girl's narrowed jade eyes and watched as she absently brushed a strand of bright red hair off her face.

"Your help. You know, like I have a problem and I need someone to fix it for me? The landlord isn't in right now and my washer and dryer are giving me hell. Do you think you could come take a look at it?" the girl asked.

"… "

"You do live here, don't you?"

"… Yes…"

"So you know how these damn things work, right? I'm new here. I just moved in yesterday. I don't know what the hell I'm doing."

"… You're not going to attack me?" At this, the girl's eyes widened and her eyebrows lifted.

"No, why would I do that?"

"You don't find me incredibly attractive?"

"Whoa now. Get off your high horse there, buster. What makes you think I even remotely care about you? Are you an egomaniac or what?"

"No, I just… you're sure you're not attracted to me? You're not just trying to get me into your apartment so you can jump my bones?"

The girl immediately stood up. Her face was a mask of disgust as she backed away.

"What kind of sick freak are you? Ugh, this is what I get for buying a place on the Upper West side. And here I thought the Lower East was the loser magnet…" She abruptly turned on her heels and marched off down the hallway. Stunned, Zelgadis hastily got to his feet and followed her.

"Wait, hold up! I didn't mean that-"

"Don't talk to me!"

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? I've had a very bad couple of weeks; you wouldn't believe the crap I've been through-"

"I don't care about your personal problems! Go crawl back in the hole you came from!"

Zelgadis grabbed the girl's slender wrist. In hindsight, Zelgadis saw this as a big mistake. It surprised him how much strength the small female had. Talk about appearances being deceiving…

In a flash, the girl had Zelgadis flipped over her shoulder and writhing on the ground. She got down on her knees and planted each of her hands on either side of Zelgadis's head.

"Don't. Ever. Touch me," she snarled. Zelgadis shrunk under her vicious glare.

"I'm really, really sorry," he replied meekly. "I can help you. Really. And I'm not a sick freak, either."

The two people stared at each other for several moments, Zelgadis hardly daring to breathe. The cynical face above his disappeared and was replaced by a hand. Zelgadis blinked. The girl sighed deeply.

"It's not going to bite, I swear," she said. Zelgadis, feeling sheepish, took her hand and allowed himself to be helped up.

"You sure are strong," Zelgadis said dumbly once upright. Lina smiled and led the way to her apartment.

"Yeah, four forms of martial arts will do that to a person," she replied. "So, what's your name?"

"Zelgadis Graywords. I live down at the end of the hallway. And you?"

"Lina Inverse. And this - " Lina pushed open her apartment door and stepped aside. " - is my humble abode."

The apartment layout was almost identical to Zelgadis's, the only major difference being the piles upon piles of boxes overflowing with junk.

"As I said before, I just moved in yesterday. Pardon the mess…" Lina apologized. She hopped over a particularly large box of dishes and beckoned Zelgadis to follow her. "The washer and dryer were working fine last night, but this morning, when I tried to do another load, it just wouldn't work. I tried everything. If you can fix it, I'd be really grateful."

Zelgadis sat down on the floor and wiggled his way behind the heavy machinery. As he tinkered with the various cords and knobs, he thought about the strange girl. He couldn't figure out what was going on. Maybe his curse was gone, and he could once again wander the streets in relative safety. Get back to some sort of a normal life. Maybe even find a girlfriend who wasn't attracted to him by a bizarre and sick twist of fate. Like Lina, even…. This train of thought came unbidden in Zelgadis's head, and he blushed a fierce scarlet.

"What's wrong?" Lina asked. Zelgadis looked up to see Lina peering down at him from over the top of the washer, her soulful eyes blinking in curiosity.

"Wha…?" he stammered.

"Your face is all red. It's not too hot in here, is it?"

"No… um, no. That's not it." Before Lina could inquire further, Zelgadis slid out from behind the washer and dryer and stood up. "Okay, I think I fixed the problem. Try it now." He watched as Lina twisted the dial on the washer and the dryer, and heard both rumble to a start.

"Hey, thanks." Lina put her hands on her hips and stood in silence for a moment, contemplating the quiet machines. She flashed a brilliant smile at Zelgadis and exited the room, calling behind her "Want a cup of coffee or something?"

Coffee. The magic word. Or more precisely, Zelgadis's magic word. It was as if a button had been pushed inside him; a button marked "Press here for instant friendship."

"I'd love a cup of coffee, thank you." Zelgadis followed Lina, both picking their way carefully through the cluttered hallway. In the kitchen, Lina poured steaming hot liquid into two mugs and handed one to Zelgadis.

"I just made it a short while ago. Should still be good," Lina said. Zelgadis nodded and smiled in content. "And… uh… I'm sorry about going Amazoness on your ass back out there. It's a reflex."

"You don't have to apologize. The last few weeks have been Hell on earth for me."

"Why is that?"

"Well…" Zelgadis hesitated. He didn't want to ruin this moment. Him, a cup of coffee, and a pretty girl who wasn't trying to jump his bones: This was an extremely rare occurrence. Odds were, because Fate seemed to hate his mortal plebian guts, if he mentioned his predicament, it would break the curse's temporary suspension and Lina would be all over him like ants on spilled soda pop. Then again, he needed to test whether or not the curse was gone. So what was the harm, really? If he needed to book it… Zelgadis glanced at the boxes blocking his way. Okay, so maybe he wouldn't be able to get out, quick like a bunny. But surely he could defend himself against one girl, right?

Right?

"Hello? Zelgadis? Anyone home?"

"Oh, sorry." Zelgadis gulped his coffee and reveled in the way it burned down his throat. "The thing is, a week or so ago, I was walking home from the Starbucks, minding my own business, and suddenly all these… these WOMEN were chasing me. I don't know why, but they were. I barely made it home. For the past couple weeks, I haven't even been able to leave my apartment, on account of these ladies. Today I thought the coast was clear. I reacted like I did when I saw you, because you're the first girl I've met in the last couple weeks that hasn't been insanely… well, crazy about me."

"Really." Lina's face belied the sympathetic tone of her voice.

"You don't believe me, do you?"

"To be blunt, no. It sounds to me like you've got an Adonis complex or something."

"I swear I don't! But I wonder why you haven't reacted like all the other girls." Zelgadis slid into a reflective mood, and not paying any attention to the growing look of discomfort on Lina's face, said, "Unless you're not heterosexual, or a girl, or even a human…"

"What?!" KA-BAM! Lina slammed her coffee mug on the countertop, narrowly missing Zelgadis's hand as he flinched from the outburst. "I kindly suggest that you do not say those things about me, or I will be forced to rearrange your anatomy."

Deciding that would, indeed, be a painful fate, Zelgadis nodded and tactfully said no more.

The door swung open, and a pretty lady's face appeared around the largest stack of boxes. Gorgeous green eyes framed by raven black hair were lit with a smile that seemed to glow like a 100-watt light bulb.

"Lina, I see you're not quite finished moving in! I just came by to see if you needed…"

"Hey Sylphiel. Thanks, but I'm taking a break right now. Oh, I'd like you to meet Zelgadis Graywords. He lives-"

Zelgadis didn't even hear the rest of Lina's introduction. He was focused on the girl who suddenly had a huntress look in her eyes. A painfully familiar look, unfortunately. Zelgadis barely had time to mutter an expletive as the Sylphiel dove across the room and latched on to Zelgadis.

"OHMIGAWSH!! How did you catch him?!" she shrieked as she pawed at Zelgadis's shirt, successfully removing more buttons than was necessary. "Take me, TAKE ME!"

"…" Dumbfounded, Lina simply watched as Zelgadis fought with Sylphiel, pushing her away, only to have her come right back.

"Lina, do something for heaven's sake! She's YOUR friend!" Zelgadis yelled. Sylphiel was near tears in her euphoria. Lina snapped out of it and managed to drag her friend away.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Sylph?!" Lina demanded. Sylphiel continued to stretch her arms towards Zelgadis, but fortunately, Lina was strong enough to hold her back. "You're the least hormonal person I know! What about Gourry?"

"Gourry who?! I want this guy!" Sylphiel shrieked.

"You better leave," Lina growled at Zelgadis. Not that she was mad at him, of course. It was simply a shock to see her normally serene friend acting like a lovestruck fangirl.

"Good idea," Zelgadis muttered in return. "Thanks for the coffee."

He let himself out.

***

A half and hour later, someone banged loudly on the front door. Zelgadis, curled up on the couch with a good book and Cat lying on his stomach and purring, sighed and detached the languid feline and walked to the door.

"Who is it?" he asked.

"It's me. Let me in." Me, apparently, was Lina. Zelgadis opened the door. Lina barged right in, stalked to the couch, and plopped down on it. She folded her arms across her chest and stared up at him. "We need to talk, Zelgadis."