Sonic Series Fan Fiction ❯ FEIGN FABLE FIASCO!! ❯ ULTIMATE UNIMAGINABLE UNINANOMOUSITY! ( Chapter 3 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

A/N: Okay, I GOTTA give mad props to UltraShadow. After reading his Sleeping Beauty fic, and laughing so much, it gave me the inspiration I needed to finish my comedic Sonic fics, so I've got more hilarity for Milkshake now >=3 I've been in constant writer's block off and on, but anyway, you are AWESOME man! And special thanx to Crazay for sendin me the link at the same time I clicked on it in mah email. You're one of da best grrl!!!

A/N: I've had the summary for this fic on this comp for YEARS, and only now I was able to get into the right mood to keep writing it @_@

FEIGN FABLE FIASCO!!!: ULTIMATELY UNIMANGINABLE UNINANOMOUSITY!

Once the two arrived at the foot of Eggman's building, awe overtook them as they stared at how large it was.

“Wow…” Rouge commented, “That doctor's sure had a lot of time on his hands, hasn't he!”

“A bit too much time if you ask me…” Shadow replied.

“Yeah, I'll say!” Rouge added, then looked to Shadow with a grin.

Catching her looking at him out the corner of his eye, Shadow turned to her with a confused smile. “What…?”

“Well, what are we doin' standin' around here for? Let's go!” she chirped, grabbing his arm and pulling him into the building.

Once inside, the two curiously looked around, the faint sound of elevator music drifting around them.

“Not bad!” Rouge exclaimed then walked upto the front desk. “ 'scuse me, we're looking for Eggman's liar where he's supposedly holding people hostage.”

The woman behind the desk glanced at Rouge unsurely, tugging at the metallic collar she wore. “Um…that would be up on the 6th floor. Please take the elevator to your left. Thank you. Have a nice day at Eggman's Empire.” She said in an almost automated tone and bowed.

Shadow raised an eyebrow at this, but had no time to comment as Rouge pulled him along by his arm again.

Inside the elevator, Rouge quickly pressed the `door close' button and waited for the them to shut.

Saying nothing for a while, Shadow looked to her eyeing the buttons strangely. He made a confused face, but didn't bother asking about it. “Say, Rouge, what floor did the receptionist say Eggman's lair was?”

“Mmm on the 6th…” Rouge replied, punching the 2nd floor button, then the 3rd, then the 4th…

Not understanding that she was stalling their stop, Shadow stepped closer to her and took her hand away from the buttons. “What are you doing!?”

Grinning, Rouge pulled her hand away and motioned for him to come closer. “Come here and I'll show you…”

On the 6th floor…

“Allright, I want everyone to be at their best abilities tonight!” Eggman commanded, pacing back and forth. “I want to give our audience one of the best performances they have ever seen!”

“Sure, no problem. Just calm down Eggman! There's nothing to worry about!” Sonic reassured, leaning lazily against a wall.

“Yeah, Let's just hurry up so we can get this over with!” Knuckles chimed in, practicing his straight punches.

“I don't care how long it takes, just as long as I get a part! Right Cream?” Amy added, looking to the little rabbit, who nodded enthusiastically.

“It sure is, Amy!” she answered gleefully.

“Well, we can't be the only ones here to audition for parts.” Tails spoke up. “Where're Shadow and Rouge?”

As if on cue, the elevator finally came to a stop on the 6th floor, revealing the duo. Rouge had her arms wrapped around Shadow's neck and Shadow was in a complete daze…unable to keep his balance. His face was covered in kiss marks.

“Hi guys!” Rouge called, taking Shadow's hand and leading him out into the hall so he wouldn't fall over. “Did we miss anything?”

“No, but we sure did with the show you two probably put on!” Amy called.

“Yeah so what took you two so long? Shadow lose something down your throat?” Knuckles growled, glaring at Shadow…who was still in a daze.

Ignoring the snickers she received from Sonic and the loud chortling by Eggman, Rouge whisked a hand through her hair and walked past all of them.

“Get yourself a woman, Knucklehead.” She said, as she pushed past Knuckles.

Not even trying to stop her, Knuckles spread out his arms and looked between Sonic and Tails and then back to Rouge to indicate that she just dissed him and no one was going to do anything about it..

“Nope!” Sonic grinned, walking away and heading towards the stage.

“Sorry can't help you there, Knuckles!” Tails added and followed after Sonic.

“Yeah...tch, you're on your own!” Amy commented as she and Cream ran upto the stage also.

“See you in the auditions Knuckles!” Eggman announced and went to where the others were.

Standing all by his lonesome, Knuckles growled and shook his fist, running after all of them.

“*^&^$%^!!”

Soon the auditions began!!

Eggman had them all read a few lines from Romeo and Juliet to get a feel for who was going to be who. But in the end it really didn't matter, since all their lines were going to be made up.

But Eggman liked feeling important so he did it anyway.

After all, it WAS his empire!

First up was Sonic and Amy.

Giggling, Amy glanced over her lines and snuggled up on Sonic's arm. “How romantic! We're reading LINES together!”

“Ugh, please don't rub it in, Amy…” Sonic groaned, moving away from her and straightening out his script.

“Allright you two, ready?” Eggman called, holding up 3 fingers and counting down. “In 3,2,1 go!”

“Um… Oh...then...dear saint…uhh…let lips do what hands do…uhh..” Everytime Sonic said `uhh' he had to pause and look at his script.

Thankfully Eggman stopped him before he could continue. “Amy, it's your turn.”

Laughing giddily, Amy smiled broadly at Sonic and read her lines well.

“THEN HAVE MY LIPS!!! The SIN that they have TOOK!! Oh Sonic, TAKE MY LIPS!!”

…Too bad they were dripping in sappiness.

“Hey, no drooling over the auditioners, Amy! Next!”

“Thank you…!” Sonic grumbled, leaving the stage in a flash, with of course, Amy chasing after him.

“Those two are out.” Eggman spoke to himself, jotting down something on a notepad. Looking up, he nodded to Knuckles and Cream. “You two are up!”

After exchanging odd glances, Knuckles and Cream stepped upto the stage.

“3,2,1 GO!”

Knuckles cleared his throat and held the script close to his face. “They pray, grant tho, lust faith turn to despair. Wait a minute, that doesn't sound right…”

“That's because it isn't…” Eggman corrected.

“Oh! My bad!” Knuckles exclaimed and quickly went over his lines again and spoke them correctly to Cream, who giggled. “Why, saints do not move, though grant for prayer's sake! Tee hee!”

Eyeing them warily, Eggman scratched something out and jotted something else down in its place. “Allright, you two may go. Knuckles, you're in. And Cream…I'm sorry, but this event may be a bit too much for you. I should have put an age rating on this thing.”

“Oh…okay…” she said softly and dragged her feet off the stage.

Seeing her so down, Tails took off after her to console her. So he was out.

The only two left to try out were…

“Hey…you two lovebirds, get over here.” Eggman stated plainly.

Surprised he'd be addressing them as such, Rouge grinned and sauntered onto the stage as if it were a catwalk, posed, turned and then walked back the other way. Silently, she motioned for Shadow to do the same, and he walked down the stage with a little rise in his step, posed, posed again, then waited for Rouge to come back down and join him in a pose.

Eggman watched the two warily as clapping was heard from the back of the room. Turning around he saw it to be Cream and Tails. Then with a wave, Tails left out the door. Cream waved also, then flipped Eggman the bird when he turned his back.

Shadow and Rouge stared at her with shocked expressions on their faces and only gave Eggman their attention when he said something.

“Should I even have to ask you two to read your lines? You've already got my interest.”

“Hmmm” Rouge pondered, looking over at Shadow. “Should we?”

He smirked and nodded, straightening out his script. “Yes, let's. Juliet, you may start.”

“Why thank you! Okay! `Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake' “

“ `Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take. Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.' “ Shadow replied, lightly taking hold of her hand.

“ `Then have my lips the sin that they have took.' ” Rouge grinned slyly, beckoning him to come closer.

“ `Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again.' …and again…” he added, leaning in closing his eyes.

Rouge followed suit, but the both stopped when they saw Eggman staring directly at them, tapping his foot.

“Well, what you waiting for? Why did you stop?”

Rouge shrugged “Hmm I'm not so sure…perhaps it was the mood you interrupted…”

Shadow shrugged too and waved the situation away with a chuckle. “Let's just get this over with.”

“Good answer!” Eggman replied and finished taking his notes. “Now, you two go out in the hall and I will announce the parts by name.”

“What fore, there's only 3 of us who are going to be in this thing right?” Shadow asked, glancing at Rouge, who nodded.

“Correct” Eggman said, but waved a finger “However, only 3 of you have been chosen for this particular fairy tale. Now, it's a bedtime story, but I don't want the audience falling asleep on us! So, make it interesting!”

“I could hear you all the way from the back of the room.” Knuckles spoke up, walking upto all of them.

“Excellent, then I shall issue your parts here and now. Shadow, you are playing the part of an intelligent young child, Knuckles you are playing the part of a curious and playful character, and Rouge…”

“Yes?”

Eggman peered down at her assets, then looked back upto her face with a grin. “…You are playing the part of a voluptuous villain!”

She half-smiled “I guess some things never change…”

“So what's the name of this story…?” Knuckles asked.

To this Eggman grinned, a glint in his eye. “Oh you will soon see Knuckles. LET THE SHOW BEGIN!!”

Things to clear up-

No, nothing explicit happened in the elevator between Shad n Rougie. She just covered his face in kisses, is all.

And by the way, the way, the lines from Romeo and Juliet that they were reading from was from Scene V. This excerpt curtesy of the site it came from, I don't own it, so don't come after me.

http://www-tech.mit.edu/Shakespeare/romeo_juliet/ is the page.

ROMEO

O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do;
They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.

JULIET

Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.

ROMEO

Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.
Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.

JULIET

Then have my lips the sin that they have took.

ROMEO

Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged!
Give me my sin again.

I put it here so you could see how badly some of the chars messed up on it. Like coughcoughSoniccoughcough

Lol

-Mel