Twilight Fan Fiction / Twilight Fan Fiction / Twilight Fan Fiction ❯ Untitled: A Leah Clearwater Story ❯ Chapter 23 ( Chapter 23 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Chapter 23
I hated having to wake up when last night was so perfect, having to go to school and pretend to be a child really didn’t appeal to me. Even though I more than enjoyed making out with Nahuel last night, the whole thing seemed to leave us both frustrated, I was annoyed that last night came to an abrupt stop, and Nahuel seemed frustrated from his lack of self control.
“You are trying to make it impossible to save you virtue, I am fighting an uphill battle and I am afraid I am going to lose terribly!” He said laughing but still pulling away from me and pulling to covers over us.
“I’m still confused as to why you feel us having sex would be so horrible” I turned away from him.
“See what I mean about the uphill battle,” he said poking me in the back, he then pulled me into his arms, “It wouldn’t be bad, it just wouldn’t be proper.” He kissed my shoulder, then moved my hair to the opposite side so my neck was exposed he rubbed his nose and lips over the newly exposed area.
“Maybe your right about all of this virtue stuff . . . we should stop doing all of this until our wedding night” I pouted and he laughed, it annoyed me that he thought this was funny. It certainly wasn’t funny to me, all this ‘almost sex’ was good but not as good as the real thing (so I had been told).
“This should be fine, nothing serious will come of this,” he said resuming he activities.
“That’s what you think,” I nudged him slightly so he would stop, “Do you feel this?” I placed his hand on my chest so he could feel my heartbeat, “It doesn’t get any faster than that. I sometimes I feel like I can barely breathe.”
“And you think you don’t have the same affect on me?” he placed my hand on his chest and his heartbeat was faster than normal but it still didn’t compare to mine.
“It’s not the same, and you know!” I hit him with a pillow and because his little arrogant smirk and started to color his face.
“Well I don’t know what you want me to do.” He laughed pulling me to him yet again, it seemed like it annoyed him when I moved, “I love you I am just trying to do the right thing.”
“You claimed to love that Eva chick and you slept with her. What’s the difference? Why wasn’t her virtue important?” I murmured after the questions escaped my lips I wished that I had never admitted my emotions.
“She wasn’t you. What I felt for her was less than nothing in comparison to what I feel for you.”
“Or maybe you were more attracted to her physically than you are to me.” He looked at me shocked and annoyed at the same time. To be honest the statement had surprised me too, I had never been the type of girl to compare myself to others, I tried to live by the statement I am who I am and if you don’t like it tough. However the thought of Eva now consumed my brain, I couldn’t help but wonder what she had looked like, she was probably gorgeous most of the vampires had the tendency to be well off in the looks department.
“Don’t be idiotic, it would take a lot for a woman to even come to doing have of what you do for me . . .physically or in any other way for that matter.” I had every intention of being angry with him for referring to me and using the term idiotic in the same breath, but there was something about the way he looked at me that deflated my ego and made be resistant to argue with him anymore. I lay on my back and sighed deeply in defeat he traced the side of my face and gently connected his lips with mine. I think his intention was to kiss me briefly but it turned into something more, like all of our kisses seemed to do lately. That night Nahuel ended up topless and there only one more item of clothing that needed to be removed for him to be deemed nude. I decided to try my luck and allowed my hands to travel the distance necessary to achieve this objective when all of a sudden he grabbed my hands and placed them over my head.
“Goodnight Leah!” he said breathlessly collapsing to my side.
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That night caused the silence between us at the kitchen table the next morning, the car ride to school, and the wall down the hallway to homeroom. Several times it seemed as though he wanted to say something but didn’t. I was angry with myself knowing that I had caused this unnecessary riff between us. I kept asking myself why did I care so much about his previous lover she didn’t exist anymore and her memory was no longer in his mind why was she tormenting mine.
“See you at lunch” Nahuel said he released my hand and walked away across the hall to his class. That was the first time he had spoken to me all morning. A simple nod was all I gave in response.
During homeroom my mood brightened when Mrs. Sparks handed Ren and me a pass to go to Ms. Jordan’s room. I had forgotten that we had volunteered to assist in the creation of the background and other props needed for the drama club’s play.
“Hey girls!” Ms. Jordan said eagerly as we entered her room, “thanks again for volunteering! Grab some of those materials and follow me to the auxiliary gym.”
Once I put the box of art supplies down I surveyed the gym and noticed that there seemed to only be eight people besides Ren and me working on this project.
“Is this all the help you have?” I asked hoping that the humor was not evident in my voice.
“Unfortunately you are correct. Most of the dram club student’s grades aren’t quite good enough for their teacher to feel comfortable with them missing a whole day of work.” She said handing me a pain brush, “I may recruit a few more honor students to help with lifting props and other miscellaneous activities.”
“I have some suggestions on some kids that wouldn’t mind missing a few classes.” Ren spoke up and I elbowed her in the ribs, “Oww!” she frowned at me and I laughed she was always looking for a way to spend more time with Jacob, you would think living with the guy would be enough, I know she is imprinted on him but sometimes he acts so simple that even she has to become annoyed.
“Thank you, Miss Cullen that’s quite alright I have talked to a few teachers and they are willing to send a few volunteers throughout the day.” Ms. Jordan then grabbed her clipboard and checked a few items off of her list, “Leah I have a special project for you” she led me to the huge blank back drop and handed me a picture, “Can you recreate this?”
The picture seemed simple enough a night sky, snow, and a cabin off in the distance. I nodded my response, “Who will be helping me?” the canvas so large that imagined she would have two or three students working on it.
“Only you will be working on this particular drop” as she spoke I looked around and saw all the other students partnered up, “I have every confidence in you” she touched my should and handed me a can of white paint.
“What will I be doing?” Ren said looking over my shoulder at the picture.
“I need someone to make trees” as she examined her clipboard.
“Make tree? That’s it?” Ren huffed.
“Yep!” Ms. Jordan said walking away.
“You give Leah this huge project and I’m stuck making trees, I should go outside and rip on from the ground and bring it in here.” Ren murmured as she walked toward the brown cardboard.
Surprisingly Ren and I both made quick work of our projects and went to grab the big fans from the art studio to dry the props. After all of that we got set up the first scene on the stage behind the certain. We both had to pretend to strain the push the bed into the center of the stage; we then dressed with a purple velvet blanket and golden pillows. After we finished I fell back onto the bed and thought yet again about last night. I hated to admit it but today for some reason I could not let the Eva thing go. I could not stop the possible images of what the woman could have looked like from entering my mind. Another question had also entered my mind: How was she able to lure Nahuel to have sex with her? (I certainly wasn’t having any luck)
“You okay?” Ren showed me my expression and I felt her concern.
“Yeah” I could feel the frown on my face, I knew she wouldn’t believe me so I confessed, “Actually there is something bothering me, but it is really stupid and I shouldn’t be concerned.”
“What is it?” Ren said her eyes wide with worry and curiosity.
“Did you know that Nahuel was with someone before me?”
“When you say ‘with’ you mean . . .”
“Sexually” I nodded I felt better already having someone else know about it, however something in the back of my mind told me that Ren wasn’t the best person to confide in, she was still very young and had a tendency to blab information if the end result favored her.
“No I had no idea!” she flopped on the bed beside me, “How long ago was this?” So I fill her in on the whole situation and tell her about Eva.
“You’re right there is nothing for you to worry about. He killed her so it is kinda obvious he didn’t really love her, if he had he probably would have let her kill him!” Ren laughed.
“Don’t laugh, this whole thing has me feeling like an idiot!” I said covering my face, and then I smelled a weird aroma (similar to dirt and something sweet), “Do you smell that?” I said scrunching my nose up.
“No” then she shows me that some guys were on the other side of the stage watching us.
“Can they hear us?” I whispered and she shook her head in response.
“If you are really that curious about Eva why not just ask him, he will tell you and then you can stop being so dumb.” She said hitting with a boa she found in the prop box.
“We’ve already discussed her a few times and I really don’t want to beat a dead horse. I am just a little curious why he has so much self control when it comes to being with me, but when it came to her he could help himself.”
We both lay on the bed in silence thing of logical explanations, and the aroma got stronger, “Seriously you don’t smell that?”
“Smell what?” she sat up and sniffed in the air unconcerned, “I think there are many explanations that could work but the best one I came up with is that he is older now and his experience may have left him cautious of his actions.”
“Sound good enough to me!” I said trying to laugh my frustration off, I grabbed some curtains and hung them in place. “Ren can I ask you a personal question?” I could not believe I was about to ask a seven year old for sex advice, but the truth was she had more experience in that department.
“Sure, go for it!” she said as she laid on the bed tossing a pillow in the air it accidentally hit a light but it didn’t shatter when it came back down she quickly placed it behind her head.
“How is it with Jacob?”
“What!” she sat up on the bed shocked by my question, “Why?”
“I don’t want details or anything dummy, I was just wondering if you two were still as passionate about each other now that you’ve had sex.”
“Yes probably more so” she smiled at the thought, “Jacob is amazing!” she went to touch me.
“No visuals necessary!” I said jumping away from her, “A simple yes works just fine!”
“I am sorry Leah, but this is the only way you’ll fully believe me!” She then grabbed me and several visions of Ren and Jacob’s escapades ran through my head and the emotions she felt made me nauseous and jealous at the same time.
“I guest that’s good to know,” I groaned as I tried to shake the visions from my mind Ren laughed hysterically.
“Why do you really feel like you have to have sex with Nahuel before marriage anyway? Sometimes I wish I had waited then maybe Jacob would have proposed to me by now.” She sighed obviously frustrated she had been bothering Jacob about a ring ever since I had gotten mine.
“Why are you in such a rush to get married? You already know Jacob’s willing to spend eternity with you.”
“I know, but there’s something about knowing that I would secretly be Mrs. Renesmee Black that causes me such joy I can’t describe it.” she blushed.
“You know what I just realized? I don’t know Nahuel’s last name.” I laughed it’s scary that I know so little about this personal background, yet I’m still so willing to be his completely.
“It’s because he doesn’t use one. Would you want the last name of a man that would openly admit he wants you dead?”
“Good point. So what last name will I be getting?” Ren laughed at my question as if it were stupid, “Oh no, I’m gonna be a Cullen!”
“Yep that’s the name he plans to marry you with anyway, and don’t act like it is such a bad thing, you know you kinda like it” I frowned at her statement I would be Mrs. Leah Cullen, I would be a part of the family who I had at one time, not so secretly wanted to fall of off the face of the Earth.
Ren and I played hooky for a while we hung out on the bed on the stage just talking about random stuff when all of a sudden a big annoying blob pokes his head through the curtain.
“HEY!” Jacob said, “Did I scare you?” he wriggled his eyebrows trying to be funny, to me he just looked kinda stupid.
“No” Ren giggled and opened the curtain, “We heard you coming, you’re not very light on you feet Hun” Jacob walked in and Nahuel followed him carrying two of the large prop trees from the gym.
‘Where should I put these?” He said pretending to be straining.
“Over there, here let me take one” I grabbed the tree and we took them to the Act 4 section. I turned around and almost bumped into him. We made eye contact and I stared at him wide eyed still disoriented by almost bumping into him. I noticed that he looked stressed which was odd I never seen look that way before. I racked my mind trying to think what was bothering him and I hoped he had forgotten about last night and was worried about something trivial.
“So is this what you’ve been doing all day, skipping classes and talking to Ren?”
“No, we’ve been helping Ms. Jordan, I painted a back drop and set the stage” I said defensively putting my hands on my hips. He used the opportunity to wrap his arms around me and kiss me several times on the cheek.
“Nahuel! What’s the deal with all of this PDA?” I laughed and he frowned, “Public display of affection.” I clarified and he nodded.
“Nobody was watching, besides from what I heard you need a little reassurance regarding my feelings for you.” He said tightening his snare around my waist.
“Who told you that?”
“Nobody told me anything, but I heard a few things” I narrowed my eyes at him trying to figure out what he was talking about.
“Are you going to ask me about Eva or not? Now is just as good of a time as any to rehash the past . . .yet again.” He smirked obviously amused by my slight obsession on the subject.
“I have a better question. Why are you eavesdropping on my conversations?” I said poking him in the chest, he released his grip on me and I went to walk back to Ren and Jacob and then he grabbed the back of my jumper.
“If we don’t address this now I will stress the issue at a later time, you know that I don’t drop things easily.”
“Sure then I might as well get it over with” I said sitting on the floor, “So lets talk!”
“Well, what did you want to know about her?” He sat beside me and started playing with my engagement ring, his face became stressed again as he looked at it.
“You are the eavesdropper you tell me.” He smiled at me.
“True enough, I do know couple of your concerns. Eva had long brown hair and her complexion was slightly lighter than mine, which is all I really remember about her looks. As far as me being eager to sleep with her . . .” I looked down at my hands unwilling to look him in the eyes, “I was young and stupid. I was looking for a way to prove my manhood and she was the first female that I had met that resembled what I was, that I wasn’t related to anyway. How was I supposed to know that I would fall for someone completely different from me, yet perfect for me so many years later?” I finally looked him in the eyes to see if the truth could be found there. I believe it was, he stared at me as if they were pleading for approval or understanding. Staring into his eyes made my blood boil anything I was feeling regards to Eva had disappeared and been replaced by another emotion. I felt as if I were physically being pulled towards him. There was a silence between us because I honestly didn’t know what to say to him. Nahuel always knew the right things to say to make me forgive him and I was now distracted by other thought that I couldn’t ignore and not for lack of trying, his pull on me is just too great.
“I guess I should go see if Ms. Jordan has anything else for me to do before I return to class.” Nahuel started to walk away, but before he could I stepped in front of him and placed my hand on his chest.
“You don’t have to leave right away do you?” I smiled at him and he look completely lost, I lead him to a corner of the backstage area and pushed him into a wall and kissed him. The way I kissed him was different it was assertive, aggressive, and extremely possessive. My hands traveled up his shirt and I clawed at his chest.
“Leah, what are you doing?” he laughed quietly finally managing to push me away momentarily to take a few breaths.
“I’m doing what I want and there’s nothing you can do about it” with I imitated the trail he usually created on me, I went from his bottom of his chin to his collarbone, however I didn’t have the self-control to stop there. I led him behind the curtain and removed his shirt and continued to deliver kisses and caresses down his chest until I reached his waistline where is belt taunted me, knowing that he wouldn’t let me go much further, I decided to go for it and push the envelop a little. I knelt in front of him and used my tongue to trace the area right below his belly button. I reached for his belt buckle and out of nowhere I was now staring him in the eye and my legs had been wrapped around his waist. He pressed his lips against mine and undid the straps to my jumper placing my back against the wall, he pressed all of his body against me. I realized that this was the first time I actually felt Nahuel’s desire to be with me. We had become secluded in our own little world of urgency, taboo, and passion. I couldn’t believe that Nahuel hadn’t resisted my advance by now, he actually seemed like he was ready to go all of the way.
“Umm, I not trying to ruin a moment or anything but we can hear you two pretty clearly.” Jacob said obviously grossed out, “Nahuel we gotta go back to class man.” Nahuel hastily stopped our kiss.
“We’ll have to talk later tonight” Nahuel whispered and kissed me on the cheek. He let me down and followed me out to the stage area. I watched as he and Jacob left. I flopped back on the bed once more.
“So I’m guessing everything is cleared up now!” She laughed and I threw a pillow at her.
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I stayed at school to help Ms. Jordan with the final arrangements for the play. She wanted me to stay and see the show, but I watched the rehearsal and wasn’t impressed. I flopped on the couch and found the remote and started flipping through the channels when Emmett decided to grace me with his presence.
“I was watching that!” he said snatching the remote.
“You snooze you lose!” I said grabbing it back.
“I never snooze” he smirked, “Besides you won’t be here long, Nahuel’s looking for you.”
“Oh” I said trying to decide whether I should look for him or just let him find me.
“What’s wrong Lee, you look like you’ve just seen a ghost or something?” I just shook my head dismissing his accusation, but I did feel like something bad was about to happen. Just then Nahuel bounded down the stairs and sat between Emmett and me. He addressed me by kissing my briefly on the forehead and then started to ask Emmett questions about the game. Their whole conversation bored me, I like to play sports not watch them. I must have fallen asleep while they were talking because I was awakened with Nahuel’s lips at my ear, “Can we talk now?” he whispered taking my hand and leading me up the stairs.
“There has been something I have trying to tell you, but I keep losing my valor” he sat down on the bed beside me, “This won’t be easy for you to hear but I need you to stay calm and objective.”
“Okay, now I’m officially worried. What’s wrong?” he closed his eyes and breathed deeply as if to prepare himself for something terrible.
“I think my father’s tracking me,” he said with his eyes still closed.
“Okay” I must have been missing the point he is living with a coven full of vampires and shapeshifters, he surely was concerned about his father attacking him.
“I can’t let him find me or learn about you he’ll want to kill us both. He’d kill me for spite and you for research.”
“Research? Why would he want to study me?”
“Leah, why do you fail to understand the potential power you could possess? You are the only female of you kind and now you blood is traced with my venom. He’d want to know how you function and he will kill you for those results!”
“So what do we do to stop him?” I had fought before and I would fight again.
“I’m afraid that there’s nothing we can do, the only way he’ll leave is if I lure him away.” He finally opened his eyes and that stressful look I had seen today reappeared.
“So we are leaving?” I asked hoping that that’s what he meant. We could go away and get married have a honeymoon and be happy together.
“We aren’t leaving Leah . . . I am.”