Vision Of Escaflowne Fan Fiction ❯ Heart of the Dragon ❯ What's Torture Compared to This? ( Chapter 14 )

Chapter Fourteen: What's Torture Compared to This?

There was dust in her nose, and the smell of blood. Lying on her side, cheek pressed to the dirt floor, she watched a small ant crawl past her. A sound came to her ears and she closed her eyes. "Van," she croaked, waiting for him. A small light from a candle streaked through the shadows where she lay. She couldn't move; she could scarcely turn her head. She saw his leather boots before he came down on his knees before her.

"Hello, your highness. How are you feeling, Queen Hitomi?" Dilandau grabbed her shoulder and shoved her onto her stomach, ignoring her choked cry of pain. Her legs hit him uselessly while he unlaced the back of her gown and tore her chemise open. He touched her bruised and bloody skin with deliberate cruelty. "You don't even look pretty anymore."

He flipped her back over and dragged her over to the makeshift bed. She knew what was going to happen; he was going to rape her. She couldn't do anything about it either. She was so weak...but she wouldn't just give up.

The fist she tried to beat his side with was loose and pitiful. Something was wrong with her wrist and she didn't know what. He pulled her onto the bed and laid down on top of her, tugging down her bodice. He cursed when he heard someone outside of the tent. He growled at her and pulled it back up into place. He heaved himself off her and stood just in time as Seibu walked in surprisingly graceful for her leg.

She gave him a suspicious look. "What are you doing, Dilandau?"

"Trying to make her feel better," he lied smoothly.

Seibu shrugged. "It's time to let her go. Do you have any idea where you want to bring her and drop her off?"

He walked over to her and whispered it in her ear. She nodded and walked away, shouting orders for horses to be made ready for a short trip to the woods.

Hitomi felt the fog fall over her and welcomed the blackness, the pain going away slowly. She closed her eyes and the last thing she saw was Dilandau's distorted smile.

Van felt intense pain in his back and his wings faltered, making him plummet to the ground far below him. When a gust of wind blew underneath him, it held him suspended in the air until the pain went away and he recovered control. Something else had happened to Hitomi. He felt fierce determination go through him and he searched harder.

She wandered mindlessly, so oblivious of everything that she kept running into trees or falling from tripping on something like a rock or root from a tree. She smacked her head off a low lying branch from a tree and her hand flew up to her forehead to rub the minor pain away compared to the rest of her body.

How many days had it been? Three? Four? She didn't know. It felt like she had been walking forever, never stopping. The sun set and rose repeatedly, and yet she was still walking, not sleeping or anything.

When she tripped on a large black rock, she stopped. She couldn't go on anymore. She was starving, and so beyond pain she didn't even feel the fall.

She looked up and swiped the dirt off her face when she heard a hoarse squall. She blinked and tried to get up, but she couldn't. She heard the harsh cry again and she felt her mother's instinct kick in. She dragged herself with her arms, straining the muscles. The wail sounded again and again, and it got louder as she pulled herself along.

She came to a tiny clearing, a small pond filled and covered with green foam and surrounded with yellow-green foliage. She hauled herself to a tree and pulled herself up, closing her eyes against the burning pain and the horrid thoughts going through her mind. She couldn't stop them.

What she saw when she opened her eyes shocked all of the pain out of her system and the appalling thoughts out of her mind.

A baby dragon was wailing from the middle of the pond, trying to get out of the muck at the bottom of the pond. It was totally different from land dragons, and it obviously wasn't a water dragon, so that left it to be a flying dragon. It was small and skinny, no doubt on account of it being a baby. Its black-green scaly skin was covered in the nasty smelling green scum. Its mouth opened and another hoarse, sad cry filled the air.

Hitomi watched the poor animal and wondered what she should do to help it. She felt pain for the dragon fill her heart when she saw it unfurl its long wings coated in gore. One of them looked like it was ripped.

She let go of the mold surfaced tree and made her way slowly to the pond. The dragon saw her and cowered back into the water, only its eyes and nose visible from above the water.

Hitomi smiled when she saw the show and she went closer to the pond. She started murmuring comforting words to help sooth the creature and held out her hand.

The dragon brought its head back out of the water curiously. It sniffed her hand, then snorted. It tried again to get out, the familiar squall filling the air.

"Shhh, it's ok. I'm going to help you, alright? Don't worry, I won't hurt you. Shhh, calm down."

She looked around, wondering yet again what she should do. She cringed at the thought of jumping into the water to save it.

She looked down at her tattered gown and took it off, so she was only in her torn chemise. She gagged and closed her eyes, jumping in. The disgusting green ooze engulfed her and went to her upper ribs. Her feet sunk to the bottom and started to get stuck. She jerked them up and swam carefully over to the dragon. She murmured more soothing words and the dragon seemed to calm down. It brought its long neck and small thin head out of the water.

Hitomi couldn't believe she thought the thing was cute. She smiled and made it over to the baby animal. She didn't hesitate to touch it, she felt some sort of bond with the suffering beast. She laid her hands on its back, away from its wings. The creature started to quiver and Hitomi felt so bad for it, for the pain it was going through. At least concentrating on something else was helping her own pain go away. "Ok, come on. I'm going to get you out of here. But I'm going to need your help."

The dragon seemed to understand her and snorted.

Hitomi took a deep breath and reached her hands into the water. She stuck her tongue out in abhorrence and nausea. "Gross, nasty, horrid..." she kept calling the water names as she searched for the dragon's stomach. When she found it, her head was the only thing above the water.

"Ok, you can start to try to get out of here now," Hitomi said and lifted with all her might, pain lacing up her arms. Her wrist felt like it was about to snap in half, but she just couldn't leave this animal here to die or for predators.

The dragon struggled, snorting and crying. Hitomi heaved and felt it start to come free. She groaned in pain and pulled one more time, freeing the beast. It swam almost like a snake to the edge of the pond and climbed out, shaking like a dog. Hitomi swam back over to the land and fell to the ground, her stomach protesting when she looked down at herself. The once white chemise was now covered in dark red stained blood and dirty green scum. She picked the reeds and green stuff off her, trying not to puke.

The dragon watched her, cocking its head to the side. It seemed like it was wondering what it should do.

Hitomi finished with herself and walked over to her gown. She was loath to put it back on and she didn't. She turned to the flying dragon and watched it creep up to her, its head and body low to the ground. Hitomi stood perfectly still, scared that it might turn on her. It sniffed her arm, her legs, and got right in her face and snorted. Hitomi tried not to laugh, but she did.

The dragon's long tongue curled up her arm and Hitomi was fascinated with the weird texture of it. The dragon was beautiful in an odd way, it was about ten feet long, and about three feet wide. Its wings were the largest things on it. They had to be twelve feet when they were spread. Hitomi loved the animal.

The dragon laid down at her feet, winding around her. Hitomi giggled and stepped out of the snake-like coil. She sat down next to it and touched its injured wing. The dragon flinched back and tried to get away, but Hitomi wouldn't let it.

"No, unfurl them for me so I can check it. Come on, you seem to understand me."

The dragon hesitated before it opened its wings. Hitomi smiled and patted its head, not afraid anymore.

She inspected the wound and found it wasn't as bad as she had thought it to be. It just had a small tear in it, but it had bled profusely.

She grabbed her gown and shredded it into smaller pieces, leaving one large piece for her to wrap the wing in. She didn't want to use the scummy water in the pond, so she ended up using her spit. Her mouth was dry soon, so she gave up on that. She petted its head and told her what a good girl she was. Hitomi just assumed it was a girl. The dragon closed her eyes at her touch and it looked almost like it was smiling. If it could purr, it would have been purring away.

She took the rest of her gown and wrapped its injured wing up, tying it in a complicated knot. She helped it fold it back into place and started to stroke its head and neck. The animal intrigued her.

Soon she found herself talking to it, and it seemed to understand, which astounded her even more. Her abysmal thoughts from when Dilandau had messed with her mind temporarily went away and so did her pain. She hoped her back didn't get infected from the pond water.

After another hour went by, Hitomi smiled sadly and said goodbye to her dragon. When she started to walk away, the animal started to whine and follow her. Hitomi gave up and let it follow her.

Her stomach kept growling and her dragon, who she still didn't know what to name, kept giving her weird looks. She adored the way it walked, nice and straight. She was surprised at how tall it was when it walked. It went right above her upper hips. She ignored her stomach and kept walking.

Soon it started to get dark out and she got tired. She hadn't slept for like three or four days, and she hadn't eaten either. Her eyes drooped and she almost fell. She opened them quickly and stumbled against her dragon. The animal acted like she hadn't even fallen. She started talking to it again to keep herself awake.

"I want to go home to Fanelia. I want to hold Van...."

She paused, remembering the woman Victoria. She knew she had overreacted with Van. Van was a man just like any other man in the universe. She could have hit herself. If she hadn't overreacted, then she wouldn't be here right now.

"Well, anyway, I'll tell you about Van. He is the most wonderful person in the world. He loves me, you know."

The dragon snorted. Hitomi had come to recognize that as its answering response since it couldn't talk. They went on for another hour and Hitomi stopped, not able to go on.

"Uh, I can't go on. I'm sorry, I'm just so tired. I can't go on...."

The dragon's thin slithery tongue slid out of its mouth. It was if it was pointing to its back for her to climb on. "You want me to climb on and ride you? But do you know where Fanelia is?"

The dragon snorted again and Hitomi threw her leg over its back just like her horse, Adara. She sat in between the space of its neck and wings. She wrapped her arms around its thin neck and hugged it, falling asleep quickly.

Van shivered and slapped his arms, trying to create some heat. He had only stopped looking for her when his wings needed a break or when he needed to relieve himself. Other than that, he had been searching non-stop for three long days.

He saw a small clearing in the dense woods he was flying over and flew down, maneuvering through the trees. He landed on his feet unsteadily, for he wasn't used to standing after flying for so many hours on end.

He frowned when he saw the disgusting green water. He wouldn't mind a bath or some food with something to drink. He felt dirty and grubby. His skin was clammy from the dampness in the clouds. He wiped his damp forehead and sighed, sinking to the ground. He was so tired. He would have given anything for some sleep. His eyes started to fall, but they shot back open when he saw a familiar flash of ice blue. He stood up and ran over to the pile of bloody, dirty, ice blue rags. He felt like someone had dug their hand into his chest and ripped his heart out, chewing on it and spitting it out onto the floor at his feet. She was close, he could feel her. Was she alright? Was she dying??

He picked his heavy feet up and jumped back into the air. He didn't go very high, he was looking for anything that was out of place. He wouldn't be able to see her if he flew too high. The sun had just risen and the humidity got worse. He hated humidity.

He flew for a few more hours, looking frantically for her. He stopped and jerked back when he saw movement in the dense trees and undergrowth. Did she know that she was heading right for Fanelia? He felt pride go through him at how strong she was. He flew down, folding his wings back to create incredible velocity. He hovered a moment before he made slow progress through the trees. He saw another small clearing and landed there, folding his wings back and running in the direction of Hitomi. She was so close, he could hear her moving around.

When he saw her, he gaped. She was slumped over the back of a flying dragon!! The thing would kill her! What was she doing?! Was she crazy?! They were the most powerful dragons on Gaea!!! He forgot about the dragon and inspected her carefully. Her back was exposed because her once lace chemise was in tatters and barely there. She had about twenty long welts covering her back, along with dirt, blood, bruises, and green scum more than likely from the pond. Her arms were also covered in all the grime and bruises. Dried blood completely covered her whole body. He was surprised her chemise hadn't just fallen off her because from what he could tell, nothing was holding it together. He blended in with the trees as he moved along, cautiously watching the dragon. He didn't know what to do. He didn't have his sword with him. He didn't have any weapon whatsoever. He looked around for something. He didn't think he could use a stick to fend off a fire breathing creature that could kill him with one strike.

He frowned at himself. It was only a baby. What was he so scared of? Hitomi had apparently done something to it to be able to even come close to it.

The dragon stopped and looked around, sensing something wasn't right. Hitomi opened her eyes slowly and blinked a few times. The sudden stop of the comforting movement of the dragon beneath her had jolted her awake. She sat up, yawning. She stopped at the abrupt pain in her back from sitting up. She smiled at her dragon and patted its head. "Aren't you tired? I would be if I had walked all night long. Well, I did walk for three nights in a row, so I shouldn't be talking." She petted it some more and noticed how it was looking around suspiciously. "Come on. Nothing's wrong. It's probably just another dragon or something. We are so close to Fanelia. I want to be home so bad. I want to hold Van and tell him I'm sorry for everything. Now if you please, my little one, get going."

The dragon turned around and looked at her. Hitomi smiled. She loved the tiny little slits in its eyes. They should have made it look evil, but it made it look cute. "I can't believe you're cute."

The dragon snorted and started again. Hitomi talked to it some more, telling it about Van. Every once and a while it would snort, acknowledging what she was saying. She dozed off after a while, ending the conversation about how much she loved Van.

Van smiled when he saw her drop off on her speech about how much she loved him. She must be asleep. He was tired of following the dragon and jumped out in front of it. The animal jerked back and got a scared look on its face. Van frowned at it.

Hitomi jerked up herself and stared when she saw a rumpled Van in front of her. Am I dreaming? "Is that you Van?"

"Hitomi, I'm not going to ask what you are doing on that mean, evil looking beast, but all I ask is that you get off and calmly walk over here before this thing flings a ball of fire at me."

Hitomi smiled at him. He really needed to shave. "Do you know you look about seven years older with that growth of beard on you face?"

Van straightened. "Really?" He put his hand up to his face and smiled. He shook himself when he remembered that they were having a ridiculous conversation and a dragon was right in front of him. "Hitomi, please come over here now."

The dragon snorted and backed up when Van stuck his hand out. Hitomi laughed and patted its head. "It's alright. Don't worry. This is Van. Remember me telling you about him?"

The fire-breathing monster started to whine and Hitomi petted her head some more. "She's very sensitive."

Van stood there watching the scene. A flying dragon, the most powerful creature on Gaea, was sensitive? Why wasn't she dead yet? "Hitomi, please get off."

Hitomi threw her leg over its side and gracefully landed on the ground. She walked over to Van and stood before him. He choked back the lump in his throat when he got a closer look at her. Wasn't she in pain?

He opened his arms and she walked into his embrace. He didn't put his arms around her because of her back. Hitomi's eyes widened and a horrible high pitched scream emerged from her throat. She pulled away from him and dropped to the moldy ground, wrapping her arms around herself and crying. She was shivering violently, unable to stop. "Don't touch me, don't touch me, don't touch me...." she repeated again and again. Her eyes were staring at him in fear and panic. She buried her face in her arms when he went to touch her. She cringed and pulled back, shaking more fiercely than before.

"Stay away from me, don't touch me."

Van licked his dry lips. What was wrong with her? "Hitomi, are you alright? What's wrong with you?"

"Torture, horrible torture. Blood, death, massacre, fate, devastation...don't touch me...." she chanted repeatedly.

"Hitomi!!!" he yelled and grabbed her shoulders to snap her out of it. She was in some sort of trance...she had to be.

She screamed again and scrambled away from him, going to her dragon and wrapping her arms around its neck. "I said don't touch me."

"What did I do?" Van pleaded. "Did I hurt you?"

"My mind...Dilandau...blood, death, massacre, fate, devastation...don't touch me...please don't touch me."

Van stared at her. At the mention of the name Dilandau, he felt black savage rage roll through him. He wanted to kill him with his bare hands, he wanted to rip him apart and feed him to the dogs. If he had been obsessed with fire like Dilandau was, he would burn him until he was nothing but a pile of dust on the ground, and then he would burn the ground. He felt himself shake with rage and his blood boil. He clenched his fists at his side and closed his eyes.

Hitomi gaped at him as she watched the anger-filled expressions cross his face. Her trembling started to recede and she took a deep shaky breath. Why did all those disturbing and appalling pictures flash through her mind of Van doing things to her that were a violation and defilement of her body? Why did it hurt when he touched her, like a scalding hot iron? What was wrong with her? And why was this just starting? Had touching him triggered the start of it?

"Van," she whispered, letting the breath she had been holding whoosh out.

Van watched as the tremors racking her body retreated. He wanted to go to her and hold her, but apparently he couldn't touch her. "Hitomi, what's wrong with you? Why can't I touch you?"

"Why did you do those things do me? Why did you violate and hurt me like that so many times? What did I do to you? I'm so confused...."

Van's shoulders slumped and he stared at her blankly. What did she say? Did she say that he had molested her?

"I didn't do anything to you, Hitomi. You know I would never, ever hurt you-"

"Yes you did! Why did you hurt me like that?!?" She started to cry again, the tears gushing like an overflowing river. "You hurt me so bad...never touch me again."

Her final statement hit him like a death blow. He fell to the ground and he covered his ears with his hands. "Hitomi, don't do this to me!! I never hurt you!! Never!! Why are you doing this to me!!? Where are you getting this from?!?" he yelled and lifted his head. Her tears had somewhat dried and she was giving him a vacant look. He fisted his hands and hit the ground as hard as he could. He grunted at the pain and looked at his hands. He had hit a sharp rock and his left hand had been cut open on the side. It was filled with dirt and a small trickle of blood ran down his arm. He gave her one last look and got up, turning around. He gave up. He didn't know what to do. There was nothing he could do.

He walked away, his right hand holding his head and the other one hanging at his side.

Hitomi watched his retreating back and felt something inside her twist. One part of her said go to him, hold him, cherish him. Another part said run, hide, never go to him again. "Van..." she whispered brokenly and stood. All of the pain from her wounds came to her then. She gasped in pain and fell back down. Why was the pain coming to her now? When she had been abused by Dilandau and Seibu, it hadn't hurt as much as it should have, as if someone was taking the pain away from her. Now, it was all there, a sudden painful rush. She used the side of the dragon to pull herself up, struggling. She lifted herself up and over, but didn't get her leg the whole way over. The dragon turned around and grabbed her chemise, tugging her the whole way over its back. Hitomi passed out at the pain and her arms hung limply on the sides of her dragon.

The beast snorted and followed the man that was walking away faster than necessary. The dragon stayed far behind, not wanting to come close to the other human.

Van contemplated what he was going to do. He knew Hitomi's dragon was behind him, and carrying his wife. He wouldn't have left her in the first place, but something had told him that she would follow him. When he had heard her whisper his name and cry out in pain, it had taken everything in him not to go and take her in his arms.

He thought some more. His healers might be able to help, but he doubted it. He would need someone like Millerna or some monks specialized in the area.

What had Dilandau done to her? Did he do something to her mind? He didn't wonder at it, he knew that Seibu was a sorceress and more than likely had the powers to do such to Hitomi.

He slowed down, his vigorous track through the woods becoming too strenuous over the rough terrain. The heard a snort behind him and turned around, only to have eyes with slits stare back at him. He freaked out and fell backward, landing on his butt in a small mud-filled puddle. He cursed and stood up, his backside covered in muddy water.

"Damn you, what do you want?!" Van yelled at the thing and growled at it. The dragon blinked, and Van was mesmerized by it. "I guess I can see why Hitomi likes you," he muttered and smiled. He couldn't help himself.

The dragon snorted and then sneezed, its body jumping in the air. Van thought it was funny until Hitomi fell off and then he went to her side. He couldn't grasp why she didn't wake up and he hesitated to touch her. He poked her arm and when she didn't move, he laid his hand over her head. She didn't stir.

He put his arms under her neck and her knees and lifted her. He started walking again, cherishing what would probably a rare time with her not wanting him to touch her.

He let thought of killing Dilandau in unspeakable ways run through his head as he walked. He smiled every once and a while, coming to one he liked.

He listened to the dragon behind him and wondered what he should do with it. Even if he told it to go away, he doubted it would listen to him. He rolled his eyes. The thing was probably smarter than him. He smiled at the thought and came to another small clearing. It was his chance to use his wings and get to Fanelia faster to get his wife treatment.

He closed his eyes and unfurled them, waiting for the pain. He noticed how it wasn't as bad as it had used to be. More than likely because he was using them so much. He jumped into the air and flew away from the ground, the light blowing wind lifting him higher.

He looked down to see if the dragon was following still. It wasn't like he didn't want the thing to, it was just that he didn't want to have to deal with the people of his country going crazy over having a dragon so close. He smiled at his sleeping wife, knowing that she would insist that the thing stay with them and that she should take care of it. He turned over, his back facing the ground when he heard the distinct flapping of powerful wings.

The dragon flew high over him and turned around in circles, as if she was having fun. Van shook his head and flipped back over, holding Hitomi close to his body to keep her warm and safe. He hoped she didn't wake up. She would flip out at him touching her and he would end up dropping her because she was a strong fighter and he wouldn't want to hurt her in trying to restrain her.

A half an hour went by when he started to recognize things in Fanelia. He took a deep relaxing breath and smiled. The dragon was still following him, and how, he didn't know. From what it had looked like, the creature had hurt its wing because Hitomi had wrapped it up in a piece of cloth from her ice blue dress.

He saw the beginnings of the city and felt pride go through him. The city was marvelous, so much more so than many other cities on Gaea. Of course it wasn't the largest or the richest, but it was still gaining in both. He heard shouts from the men guarding the gate and walls as he flew high over them and towards the palace. He saw a man hop onto a horse and race to the royal residence. They both got there at about the same time, and by the time Van landed, everyone in the palace was pouring out and gathering around him. He folded back his wings, embarrassed when people started gossiping.

A small group of about seven healers came running over to him, insisting that they take her highness when they saw the condition she was in. Van handed her to a sturdy looking male healer and walked with them, trying to explain how she freaked out when he touched her.

They sounded both confused and acted like they knew what he was talking about. They brought her into a sickroom and pushed him out, closing and locking the door behind him.

He felt left out, considering she was his wife, but he had many other things to do while she was being tended to. He wouldn't have been any help anyway, he would have just fretted over her.

He walked briskly to his study where he saw General Dunwe waiting for him. Van nodded and walked to his large desk, sitting down and pulling out a small piece of foolscap to write on. He wrote a quick letter to both Allen and Merle, explaining where he was and that he had Hitomi. The next one he wrote to Chid, also explaining the same thing and apologizing about the disturbances at the ball. He signed his name, Van de Fanel, King of Fanelia, at the bottom and handed them both to General Dunwe, who had been standing next to him.

"Please send these out for me," Van said and walked away, not wanting to be bothered with questions about the kingdom and palace. He wanted food and he wanted sleep. To solve the first problem, he searched out a maid and ordered food. She kept staring at him with a weird look in her eyes and Van looked down and rolled his eyes. He still didn't have his shirt back on, nor his boots.

He walked slowly back to Hitomi's sickroom and knocked on the door. He was yawning and rubbing his eyes when the door swung open and an elderly woman stepped out. "Yes, your highness? Is there anything you need?" she asked in an oddly young sounding voice.

Van repressed another yawn and said, "How is she? Can I come in?"

The woman nodded and backed away to let him have room to go through the doorway. She told him that they had cleaned her, no males in the room of course. Van didn't really care, he told her, what mattered was that she is taken care of.

"But your highness, didn't you know that no other man is allowed to see her highness but you? Didn't the bishop or someone tell you that? It is strictly forbidden. I think it was in the crowning ceremony that it said that she stay pure for her country. In other words, you."

"Oh."

The woman shook her head and ushered him over to the bed. She could tell that he was in a weak form of shock and he needed treated as well. She watched his majesty inspect her beautiful highness carefully and sit on the edge of the bed.

Van smiled sadly. At least she looked clean, all the blood and gore that had covered her body was washed off. Her whole torso was wrapped up, including a few other areas, like her wrist. He didn't want to move the thin blanket off her to see if she was bandaged up anywhere else, so he just asked the woman healer next to him.

"Is she wrapped up anywhere else?"

"Your highness, some things happened to her that we're not sure of yet. It looked like she had been whipped and had had a strap taken to both her front and backside. Her um...her breasts and her abdomen weren't beaten as badly as her back, thighs, and buttocks. But the worst is her back. She also hurt her wrist, from what we think is from her fighting back and maybe hitting someone. She must have hit the person pretty hard to hurt her wrist like that. It's only fractured though." She paused and continued after adjusting the blanket around her shoulders. "We haven't inspected her the whole way yet, and we might have reason to believe, well...that she was tampered with."

Van looked at her weird. She sighed. This was really hard for her. "We think she might have been tampered with sexually." At Van's extreme panicked look, she raised her hand and set it on his shoulder. "No, your highness, we don't know yet, there is a large possibility that she wasn't. However, there is a large possibility that she has. We have to wait for her to wake up. From what you told us on this not being able, and not wanting to touch you, she has a lot of mental problems. And another thing. She seems to have an odd muscular arrangement in her back. We couldn't figure that out either."

Van gazed at the woman, shocked. He heard a knock on the door and turned towards Hitomi taking her hand and squeezing it hard. He hadn't thought her to be that bad....

He laid his head on her chest carefully, not wanting to hurt her or disturb her healing sleep. He just wanted to be reassured she was alive by hearing her heart beat smoothly beneath his ear. He squeezed his eyes closed and held onto her hand tighter. He relaxed even more when he felt and heard her regular and even breathing. He remembered holding her every night and listening to her breathe like she was now. Just knowing she was alive was a huge and relieving comfort for him.

He felt someone nudge his shoulder and didn't lift his head or open his eyes. He was too at ease and contented too move. "Yes?"

"Um, your highness, I can see that you don't want to be disturbed, but your food is here," the old woman said and nudged his bare shoulder again.

He opened his eyes at the mention of food and sat up. He was probably interfering with his wife's rest.

The old woman handed him a small tray and he sat it on his lap. He smelled soup and smoked lamb. He inhaled deeply and uncovered the meat first. He took the gold fork and knife in his hands and started cutting it and shoving it into his mouth like he was starving, which technically, he was.

The woman smiled and left the room to get more supplies that might be needed for her highness.

Van finished with the food too fast and felt his stomach start to feel sick. He set the tray on the floor next to the bed and crawled over closer to Hitomi, laying next to her and curling up to her warmth. He sighed and closed his eyes, finding much needed sleep.

Nara came back with her arms full of the supplies she had been looking for, another young female healer behind her carrying some more. When she came in and saw his majesty cuddled up to his wife, she noticed then how much he really loved her. She felt fierce determination go through her. She had to help her highness get better, and she would.

Van woke up to a dreadful scream ringing in his ears and he sat up, still half asleep. He felt the bed shift and he opened his eyes, only to see Hitomi fly off the bed and onto the floor. He scrambled over to the edge of the bed and peeked over, not sure about what he was going to see.

Hitomi didn't have any clothes on and the only thing covering her was the sheet that had fallen off the bed with her, but the covering didn't offer much protection. Three female healers came rushing into the room at the scream and went over to her highness, picking her up off the floor. They yelled at Van and told him to get out immediately.

He walked out the door and the last thing he saw was a healer cover her with a white silk robe, Hitomi staring at him like he was the worst thing in the world. He hung his head low and looked at the floor, closing the door quietly.

He was still tired. He wondered how long he had been sleeping. Not long apparently. He bumped into General Eagan on the way to his room and fell to the floor like a feeble old man. The general acted like he had just knocked down the highest being on the planet and picked Van up, explaining how sorry he was over and again.

"It's alright!" Van yelled when the general even followed him to his room, still telling him how sorry he was. The general gave him a blank look and then nodded as if acknowledging something.

"I'm sorry to disturb you at this point in time, but," he paused. "Allen Schezar and the Lady Merle were already here two days ago. When the knight found out you weren't here, he left, but he didn't take the Lady Merle with him. He ordered her to stay here, for what, she didn't know. But she has reportedly gone missing-"

"Great, now let me guess...Seibu and Dilandau took her too? Wonderful," he said sarcastically.

General Eagan lifted his hand to explain more, but got a door slammed in his face. He lowered his hand and walked away. His highness was going through a lot lately and needed to rest. Meanwhile, he would calm the nerves of the people outside about the dragon in the garden behind the palace.

A month went by and Van still wasn't allowed to see his wife. He was ready to kill someone by the time two days went by, let alone four weeks. He marched down to her sickroom and banged hard and loud on the door. He heard some people stir and get up, and a reprimand followed with it.

The door cracked open and he smiled when he saw Nara, the lead healer. She opened the door just wide enough to squeeze her wide girth through and close the door behind her. Van was ready to protest, but she shushed him.

"Shh! Her highness is in a rare good mood and is having a fun time in there. She has all this weird and odd stuff out from a bag she brought from the Mystic Moon. Lately, she has been listening to some bizarre music. She has these little sound projector things that the music emanates from. And when she isn't using those, she has something called headphones that she puts on her head and no one else can hear what she's listening to. It's really unnatural music, it has people speaking really fast and-"

"Can I please see my wife? I really need to see her. I haven't seen her for so long. I would give up all of Fanelia's treasury just to see her once..."

"I don't know, your highness. In her delicate condition, she might hurt herself and lose the-"

"I know she's in a delicate condition," Van said with a wave of his hand. "Can I just look at her? To see how she's doing?"

Nara gave up. She knew his highness really wanted to see her, and actually, he had every right to do as he pleased. "I'll clear out the rest of the healers with her right now. I think she's reading some book. She called it Spanish or something of the sort," she said and opened the door, going inside. In the next moment, three female and two male healers came out, their white robes swishing when they walked. Van nodded to them all and waited for Nara. She came out next and told him, "Don't touch her unless she allows you to. She is still reading and doesn't know you're coming in. She thinks that we are giving her a break. Be gentle with her. She spooks easily."

Van watched her walk away and stood before the door, his hand raised to turn the knob. He opened the door slowly, peeking his head through the door.

Hitomi was sitting on the bed, propped up by fluffy pillows, a book in her white hands. She was dressed in a robe just like the healers and he smiled. He went in and closed the door as quietly as he could.

He heard her saying something in some odd language and interrupted her close concentration.

"Hitomi?"

Hitomi looked up from her book, still smiling at her odd sense of humor. When she saw Van, the smile disappeared. Van felt better when he saw that an expression of horror didn't come on her face, but it remained passive.

"Can...can I come and sit next to you?" Van asked slowly, not wanting to even scare her with his voice being too loud or talking too fast. He watched her gulp and nod.

He almost tiptoed to the bed and sat on the edge, still about three feet away from her. He glanced at the book in her hands and got a curious look on his face. "What were you saying when I came in? Is that another language?"

Hitomi nodded again. She said nervously, "I said: My birthday is May tenth. And you? You don't know? Are you stupid?" she laughed just as nervously as she had talked, but Van smiled.

"Is that a language from Earth?"

She shook her head yes and set the book face down on the bed. She licked her lips and said, "I don't know why I'm reading it. I always hated other languages. I never saw why I had to learn them. I know like four basic languages and speak two fluently. I hate them all." She giggled and Van's smile widened.

"So...how are you doing?" He felt odd asking all these questions.

"Van, I can imagine how odd you feel right now."

He looked her straight on and a lopsided smile appeared on his face. Hitomi returned his smile, albeit her looking down. She looked around the room, at anything but him. "I can touch other people, Van. Like the male healers. They don't bother me at all. However, when I touch you, all this fear and horror runs through me and I freak out. I can't help it. It's some sort of chain reaction, the healers said. They told me that my mind is being told false information and that's why I can't touch you. I know it's hard for you to understand, I can just imagine how bad you want to touch me or hold me...I want to touch you also. Nevertheless, the untrue and wrong information needs to be cleared from my mind. Until then...can I touch you?"

Van looked up from his lap and blinked at her sudden question. "Aren't you going to scream?"

She looked down, ashamed. "I have never screamed so much in my life till I met you."

Van chuckled and got a serious look on his face when Hitomi held her hand out. He saw the barely detectable tremble to it and reached his own hand out. He kept it in one spot, letting Hitomi touch him, not him touch her.

Their fingertips grazed and Hitomi pulled back. Van went to lower his hand when she said angrily, "I'm not done."

Van brought his hand back up and her finger touched the top of his hand. He saw how she was biting her lip and chewing on it, a look of intense concentration on her face. She set her hand on top of his and she closed her eyes tight, waiting for the terrible pictures to go through her mind. When nothing happened, she scooted closer to him, amazed and in awe that nothing had happened.

"Wait, Hitomi. I don't think-"

At the sudden sad look in her eyes, he shut up, not being able to withstand the look. He hoped she wouldn't throw that look at him when she wanted something because he would give in at once.

Her hand went up higher and their arms touched. She gasped and closed her eyes at the scene flashing before her eyes. Van went to jerk away, but Hitomi stopped him, gripping onto his arm. She had almost a painful look on her face, but it went away after a moment. Van started to get nervous as her hand went higher and both their arms were completely touching. Every minute or so she would stop and take a break, waiting for the pictures to disintegrate in her mind. She stopped biting her lips and licked them.

Van saw the tip of her tongue come out of her mouth and flutter over her lips. His eyes almost crossed.

Hitomi had no idea what she was putting him through and she sat up on her knees, coming even closer to him. Her other hand reached out and touched his other arm, going up it a little faster than her other hand. When she went too fast, she cried out and squeezed his arms. Van forgot his lust the moment the cry sounded in his ears. "Hitomi, please, don't do this to yourself. You're forcing your mind to do unwilling things and your going to harm your delicate condition-"

"You know?!"

"Know what? Of course I know. Your body is still healing and you could hurt yourself over the simplest things, liking turning your body. I know it would kill my back if I had been whipped."

Hitomi shook her head. Her mind seemed to have calmed while he had been talking to her, making her concentrate on what he was saying. "It seems to help when you talk to me."

Van's concerned look changed into a mesmerized one. "Really? So I can talk to you and it will just go away?"

Her hand went up farther and she said, "No, it just helps some. I have to concentrate on what you're saying. The images seem to flare when I am concentrating on them."

When both of her hands were resting on his shoulders, Van was ready to force her to stop. She kept telling him no, that she could do it and she will. Van smiled at her determinedness.

Nara poked her head in through the door and almost barged in when she saw what was transpiring. Her baby, which she had come to think of her highness, was rushing herself way too fast. She heard his majesty tell her to stop in a harsh voice, but she gave him a mean look and said, "No! I will do this!"

Hitomi leaned forward and Van pushed at her shoulders. "Hitomi, no! Please, this isn't just torture for me, you're going to hurt yourself and then your going to hate me for not stopping you."

"Van, I will never hate you. I forbid you to ever say that again."

"Alright," Van said immediately at the tone in her voice.

Hitomi bent forward and said, "Um, Van, can you kind of lean forward and meet me half way? I can't go forward anymore because of my back."

Van gulped, knowing he was going to regret this more than anything.

She put her arms around his shoulders. She didn't dare press her body against him.

Van felt her take a deep breath and sigh. He wondered if she was seeing all those images in her mind or if she had sighed because she was content to hold him.

"Hitomi, what are you doing?"

"Holding you in a very awkward way. Why?"

"Just wondering. What are you going to do now?"

Hitomi started biting her lips again. "Put your arms around me, Van. Please don't argue with me. I want to hold you the right way."

"Hitomi...I don't want to hurt you-"

"Van, do I have to beat you into submission?"

Van smiled at the image. "You probably could."

He lifted his arms and felt her lean on him more and his back muscles strained because his arms weren't holding him up anymore. His fingers touched her back and he felt her start to shake. "Hitomi, if you want me to stop, just tell me, ok?"

He felt her small but vigorous nod. His hands flattened on her back and she stiffened. "Stop. Don't move, it hurts."

"Do you remember when we got married?" Van asked hurriedly, not being able to come up with anything else. He felt the shaking recede some and felt her grip his shoulders. She shook her head and said, "Yes, I will always remember that day. The old guy that crowned me scared me to death. He looks like one of those men that go on shooting sprees."

"Shooting sprees? What are those?"

"Nothing. I don't want you to know some things about Earth. It will just scare you and then I'll make myself upset and it will start another chain reaction."

"Maybe some other time, alright?"

"Yeah. Ok, you can go a little farther. But not too fast."

Van shifted his uncomfortable position and moved his hands across her back, his arms going around her more. Her trembling got worse and worse, but she didn't tell him to stop. When he had his arms the whole way around her, he moved his body closer to her and their chests touched. "Stop!!!" she yelled and dug her nails into his back. Van tried to pull away, but she arched up against him and he fell backwards, Hitomi landing on top of him.

He had never felt her shiver so violently before and it scared him. His shirt became wet with her tears and he unconsciously put his hand on her head to comfort her. Another powerful shudder racked her body and she cried, "Van don't hurt me! Please don't hurt me! Don't do those things to me again!!"

Van felt his chest constrict at her words and he stroked her hair. "Hitomi, I will never hurt you. I have never hurt you. I would kill myself if I hurt you."

He kept telling her that he would never hurt her, and she kept telling him not to hurt her.

Nara was still watching this from the doorway. She couldn't help but admire the strength of the two. Most men would have just left the woman, the perverts. But there was something different in his highness that she wished she had found when she was younger and beautiful. She watched her baby's trembling go away slowly and his highness's control over the situation and how he was calming her down. She felt like they had dealt with most of it and she closed the door. The other healers were standing behind her, wondering what was happening. "They are touching, although it took a really long time. I think a lot of it is over. Our hard work has paid off, but we still have a lot of work to finish. Let's leave them alone now. We shouldn't have been spying in the first place."

Van heard the door click and knew that someone was either in the room or that someone had been watching. "Hitomi, is someone in the room?"

"No. Nanna was watching us carefully to make sure nothing happened to me."

Van got a perplexed look on his face. "Nanna? Do you mean Nara?"

"No, on Earth, some people call their grandma's or someone like a grandma, nanna. She reminds me of a grandmother. She calls me 'her baby'. I don't mind the affection because I wasn't getting it from you. You overdosed me in it and I was suffering from withdrawals."

Van laughed and grinned at her. "How are you feeling?"

Hitomi checked her body, registering any fear that might be going through her. Nothing came to her at all, not even a slight tingle from being pressed up against Van. She could tell that he was being affected from it, and she smiled. Yet the thought of not feeling anything returned to her and she freaked. She pressed closer to him and he groaned. "Hitomi, don't do that now! You're not healed!"

She got a tearful, yet scared look on her face and Van thought he hurt her. "Hitomi, I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings-"

"Oh my God, Van!" she yelled and pushed back up against him. He gripped her arms and moaned again. "Van! I can't feel anything! I can't feel anything!" She stopped moving and started to cry, burying her face in his shoulder and pounding his chest. Van concentrated on calming down from the onslaught of feelings while she cried.

"I can't feel anything," she sobbed repeatedly. Van rubbed her arms up and down and pondered what she was saying.

"What do you mean? I don't understand."

Hitomi pressed herself against him again and he gritted his teeth, squeezing her arms in a tight grip. She buried her face in his shoulder again. "I don't feel anything when I do that."

Van felt panic go through him. "You mean...you...feel something when you do that to me?"

Hitomi hit his shoulder hard and tried to calm down. "All those frenzied and rampant feelings I get when I touch you...they're gone."

"Maybe it's just a side effect, maybe its just doing it because of a medicine your taking, maybe its just temporary, maybe we should try again in five minutes, maybe-"

"No, Van. They're gone."

Van let his body go limp and his blood cool. He felt her struggle to get up and he put his arms around her tighter. "No, don't get off me."

She hadn't kissed him in so long, she realized when her face was touching the side of his.

"Van, kiss me."

"No, kiss me. I'm not touching you and having you ha-having you upset with me."

She swallowed nervously and leaned over him. She stared into his beautiful reddish-brown eyes and watched them close.

Van jumped when he felt the barely detectable touch of her lips against his. She brought her face back up and Van opened his eyes. He watched her lick her lips and close her eyes. She kissed him a little bit more firmer than last time, but it didn't last long. He could tell she was afraid to kiss him. "Hitomi, if you don't feel safe with kissing me, then you don't have to-"

Hitomi covered his mouth with hers and plunged her tongue in his mouth. He jerked when she did it, not expecting her to go that far and that fast. Her tongue played with his almost desperately, he could tell by all the sounds she was making. He ripped his mouth away from hers when it became too much for him to bear and not go further.

Hitomi felt tears come to her eyes and she let them fall over. They pelted Van's face and he gathered her up against him, rubbing her back. "Shh, it's alright, it'll be ok. It won't always be like that Hitomi, I promise."

"It just feels so weird," she sniffed. "I have always had something go through me when you touched me, and now I don't even think, 'oh his skin is feeling a little bit more softer than usual' or 'is there something different about the way he is touching me today?'"

He lifted her up off him and laid her back on the bed. He kissed her cheek and said, "I will see you in a while. Maybe we can have lunch or something together, alright? I'll talk to you later."

He was at the door when he heard, "I love you, Van."

He stopped at the door and turned around, going back over to the bed. He gathered her in his arms and kissed her ear, inhaling her flower scent. "I love you too, Hitomi. And don't worry, we will figure something out. I'll see you in a while. In the meantime, get some rest. You more than likely exhausted yourself with all this action in one morning."

He helped her lay down on her back and he kissed her one more time before he almost ran out the door. He racked his fingers through his hair, not knowing what to do. How could he tell anyone? Hitomi was devastated and she needed and wanted help. He walked down the hall, looking for Nara. He all but ran into her when she opened a door and came out.

"Oh, I'm sorry, your highness. Is there anything I can do for you?"

Van swallowed and he felt his face start to turn red. "Uh..." he cleared his throat and started again. "Me and Hitomi can touch each other on a slow level. She and um...me, we can, um, hug without her going through too much at once. It seems if I talk to her that it helps. But...that isn't why I need to talk to you. I was wondering if perhaps...she is taking any medicine that would...um, give her any side effects....?"

Nara gave him an odd look. Why was he embarrassed? "No, your highness. The only thing we gave to her was cream and that was to rub into her wounds so she wouldn't scar and so she could heal faster. We did some very hard mind concentration games with her, and she responded well to them. But other than that, no. Why? Is there something wrong?"

Van ran his hand over his face and sighed. "Did you ever find out if...she had been tampered with sexually?"

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that. She wasn't touched, thank someone high above us."

Van smiled. He guessed he had already known that. But that wasn't what he wanted to know. He just blurted it out. "She can't feel anything for me sexually."

Nara blinked at his boldness. She smiled gently when she realized that was the reason he had been embarrassed.

"Now...your highness, I can see that you are embarrassed to talk about this, but there are some things I have to know. Are you going to be willing to talk about it?'

Van gulped and nodded. He didn't know if he hated this day or if it was a good day because he could touch Hitomi. The healer took his arm and led him into the room that she had come out of. She excused the other healers in the chamber and told him to sit down. He didn't want to, but he sat on a chair by the small window. The room was huge, it had about forty cots stationed around the walls with small tables next to them. There was only two people laying in two of the forty. They looked really sick.

"They can't hear you, don't worry. Now, I'm going to ask you a few questions and see if we can come to a conclusion and see if we can help her highness."

Van nodded apprehensively and clasped his hands between his knees. The healer stood in front of him, a piece of paper in her old age spotted hands. She went over the paper and Van guessed that there was writing on it. She said suddenly, "How long have you two been married?"

Van thought. "Not that long. About a month and a half."

She wrote it down and walked back in forth in front of him, making him more nervous than he already was. He was ready to run out of the room and go bemoan his fate in a dark corner. He wondered if he would feel more comfortable with a male healer, but decided against it. He wouldn't want any other man to know his sexual relationship with his wife. Well, he didn't want anyone to know, but it couldn't be helped.

She stopped her pacing and asked, still looking at her paper, "How many times have you had intimate relations with your wife?"

"I'm supposed to know this?!" Van asked, a horrified look on his face. Nara turned to him and gave him a look of tolerant scorn. He looked away, thinking. "Would you believe me if I told you I don't remember?"

"Yes. I would completely understand. In fact, I would have to be scared if you knew it by heart."

"Good, because I don't keep track. What an odd and humiliating conversation," Van announced and shifted in the wooden chair he was sitting in.

The old woman paced some more. "Do you have an idea?"

Van smiled when he almost said "a thousand", but he couldn't imagine the reaction in the woman. He started to think of every night that he had been with his wife and counted on his fingers. He felt his face turn even more red when he said, "Around ten."

She got a surprised look on her face when she calculated them being married for a month and a half and they had only had intimate relations around ten times. Well, more than half of that time her baby had and still was in recovery. She nodded and wrote it down.

"Does she um...respond to you as you put it?"

Van chewed on his lip and nodded, looking down at his clasped hands.

"How many times?"

"Isn't that going too far??!" Van yelled and stood up, frustrated now.

"Sit down your highness or I can't help you. Now, answer my question."

Van was ready to attack someone and he relished the thought of going to the practice field and kicking some poor soul's ass. He sighed and waved his hand. "Every time."

Nara got a shocked look on her face. Every time? Every single time? Even on their wedding night? He had to be good. She scribbled it down and walked faster, concentrating. "And what made you come to the conclusion that she doesn't feel anything?"

Van couldn't say it. He absolutely refused to say it. She gave him a look when he didn't say anything. "Do you want to leave and not help your wife? I won't help her if you leave and you'll be the one to suffer for the rest of her life. Therefore, you might as well say it. This information isn't going to go out of this room and no one else is going to find out. I am a healer, I have gone through things that you couldn't even comprehend. Just spit it out."

"She was um, lying on top of me in her room and um, she didn't feel anything when she...pressed against me. I didn't understand, and she told me that she didn't feel any of those frantic feelings when we touch. She freaked out and started crying. I thought that maybe it was just some side effect or something. But you told me that she wasn't taking any medicine. I don't know what to do," he said and buried his face in his hands. He was sick of acting so...delicate, like a damn female. He was acting worse than Millerna when she was in a bad mood. She was horrible and she flipped out at everyone, crying all the time. It was just amplified now that she was pregnant. You would think that she would have some cure because she was a doctor now.

"Oh, alright. I think I have an idea why this is happening."

Van lifted his face out of his hands and stood up, going over to the woman. He couldn't understand the writing on the paper and didn't ask.

"It's just another thing that was messed with in her mind. It will take time for it to heal, just like her being able to touch you. I still can't believe that she went that far and that fast, but she did it and I'm proud of my little baby. I think I'm going to check on her and ask her a few questions."

"Can I come?"

"No."

Van straightened and squared his shoulders. "Yes I will."

Nara forgot herself and said, "Who do you think you are?!"

Van watched as a horrified expression crossed over her face and she gasped, covering her mouth with her hand. She backed away and turned around, running out of the room.

Van stood there and glared at the open door that she had just dashed out of. He didn't feel angry, he felt odd though. No one had ever said something like that to him except his mother. He smacked his forehead. How could he be so stupid?! He totally forgot about his mother since he had come home, and that had been four weeks ago!! He cursed luridly and walked quickly out of the room. He had to find her. He didn't even know what was going on with her. She could have been dead for all he knew.

He asked ever person he came to where she was, but none of them knew. He started to get worried, Merle was already gone, and now his mother. The next person he saw was General Dunwe and he grabbed his shoulders, shaking him. "Where is my mother?! How come isn't she being watched?! Are you people stupid?!"

"Wait a second your highness. The dowager queen might be in the garden with that horrifying dragon that you insist on keeping for her highness. She has been seen walking with the creature. Did you know that the Lady Merle has been found? She was found last week!"

Van felt his jaw clench in anger. He wasn't informed about anything. "I would appreciate it in the future if I was informed about these things. I wasn't told anything." Well, maybe it was because all he did was hide out in his room and sulk.

"Well your highness, everyone just assumed that you that you wanted to be left alone and not bothered with the pressures of running a country-"

"I have been running this country since I was five. I think I can handle it." He halted in his speech suddenly. "And who was running it while I wasn't being bothered with the pressures and responsibilities? No one?!"

"Technically, yes."

Van raised his eyebrows and stalked away, in a snit. Too much was happening today. He just wanted a normal life and live it happily with his wife and raise a family. But no, he had to have the most cursed life ever created in the universe.

He went straight to the garden, pushing the people out of his way. He saw about five men tending and mulching a bed of roses and asked, "Do you know where the dowager queen is?"

"Yes, her grace is in the northern rose garden with the beast she seems to like. The thing terrifies us so we can't get a chance to tend to the roses in that area. Maybe you can ask her grace if she will perhaps move to another area for a while..." the man trailed off when his highness walked away, not caring about what he had to say. The man shrugged and went back to clipping a long stemmed rose for her highness's recovery room.

Van felt peaceful in the garden and thought about bringing Hitomi out here to eat lunch. He heard his mother and the snorting of the dragon before he saw them. He looked around a rose bush with the biggest thorns he had ever seen.

His mother was laughing, clapping her hands as the dragon did something she had asked it. Had she taught it tricks?

"Mom?"

Varie looked up, still smiling. She stood up and patted the dragon's head and walked over to Van. He grinned and took her hand, kissing it. She laughed and hugged him. "Have you turned into a charmer? Since when?"

Van smile widened and brought his mother back over to the bench she had been sitting on underneath the huge oak tree towering over them. "Since I met Hitomi."

"How is she? I haven't seen her since last week. I went to visit her. She looked unhappy and she told me how much she missed you and how the healers wouldn't let her see you. She confided in me a lot, telling me some things that she hadn't even told the healers. So, have you seen her lately?"

Van scratched his forehead and leaned back against the bench. "Yeah, I saw her today."

"How did it go?"

Van watched the dragon come over to his mother and rest its giant head on her lap. He saw how his mother wasn't even scared of it. She petted its head and it closed its eyes, sitting down and curling its growing body around her legs.

"We can touch now, but she still has a lot of healing to do. And she has other problems, but I'm not going to discuss them."

"Problems? Why can't you discuss them with me??"

"Too personal."

Varie looked hurt for a moment, but wiped it off her face. "How far did you get with the touching part?"

Van rubbed his arm muscles. They seemed oddly sore. "We can hug, but that's pretty much it. Like I said, she still needs to heal."

"Heal as in her body? Or her mind?"

"Both. It's not really her body I'm concerned about, I just want her mind to get better. That's all that matters."

Varie felt pride go through her. She had had so many disappointments in her life, like the death of her husband over a silly illness, and her son Folken. He should still be alive. But her youngest son and the last thing she had, was her only pride and joy. She loved him so much she felt tears come to her eyes. She turned away, trying to hold them back.

"Mother? Are you alright?" Van asked, concerned. He put his hand on her back and rested it on her shoulder. He squeezed it reassurance.

Varie wiped the tears off her face and turned to Van, giving him a watery smile. He gave her a gentle smile in return and he held open his arms. She went into his embrace and she sighed, content and happy for the first time in almost fifteen years. "Are you almost twenty, Van?"

"Next month, why?"

"Do you ever feel old?"

Van laughed and pulled away. "Yes and no."

Varie raised her eyebrows in question. "I feel...old when I think about my youth and everything I went through. But when I don't think about it, it doesn't bother me. Sometimes the responsibilities of running Fanelia make me feel old because I shouldn't have technically ever had the title of king. Father should still be alive, and so should Folken. Folken was the one that should have taken the weight off father's shoulders when he died, not me."

At the mention of Gaou and how he should still be alive, caused her happiness disappear. She got up and apologized to Van, telling him that she had to leave. Van understood and let her go.

The dragon started to whine and Van wanted to tell it to shut up. He bent towards it and patted its head just like his mother had. "You are and have to be the oddest dragon on Gaea."

It snorted and walked away, going under the large and thorny rosebush Van had remarked about earlier. He noticed how it had dug a nest under it and had a bunch of grass and sticks underneath it also. He shook his head and got up, walking back to the palace to get Hitomi and eat lunch.

"Van, I don't want to go outside. Don't I look a little horrific and worse for wear? I'm probably so pale I look like a ghost-"

"Another reason why you should go out. Come on, you'll like it, and you'll be with me. Doesn't that convince you otherwise?"

"Did you see Merle or your mother lately?" Hitomi asked, changing the subject abruptly.

"I just saw my mother. I don't know where Merle is. No one will tell me."

Hitomi got off of the bed for the first time that day. She was still wary of Van and stayed away from him. She didn't want to strain herself like she had this morning. It had left her tired and spent. As soon as Van had left she had gone right to sleep.

Van knew that she was still scared of him and he stayed away from her, not touching her at all. She went over to a small dresser and pulled out a white robe. She said, "Alright, I'll go. But you will owe me."

"Owe you? My whole life is dedicated to you! Isn't that enough?"

Hitomi giggled and pulled the white silk robe on. She felt exposed in the thing the healers had given her to temporarily wear. She padded over the wooden floor and to the door. "Are you coming or not?"

Van got up off the bed and walked over to her. He looked down at her and frowned. "Did you shrink?"

"Did you grow?"

Van smiled. "Maybe it's because you don't have any shoes on. Or maybe I had another growth spurt."

"Don't grow any taller because then I'll be too short."

Van wanted to take her arm and bring her outside, but he knew that if she wanted to touch him, she would. "You're taller than most women I know. Seibu went to about the middle of my chest. You go to my mouth. Don't worry, I promise I won't grow anymore."

Hitomi laughed. "You can't control that, silly!"

"How do you know?"

Hitomi rolled her eyes and laughed again. It felt so good to be outside of her boring sickroom. Staring at the light blue walls had started to get annoying to the point that she wanted to strangle herself.

"So what are we eating for lunch?"

"Whatever the servants bring out. By the way, when was the last time you saw your dragon?"

Hitomi hands flew to her face and she stopped. "Oh, I totally forgot about her!! Have you seen her lately? Is she being taken care of?"

Van almost put his hand on her back to push her forward, but stopped himself just in time. "Your mother-in-law is taking care of her. I don't know how it's being fed, but it seems healthy."

"Is she going to eat with us?"

"If she's around."

Merle peeked through the door when she heard Van and Hitomi's familiar voices. She didn't want Van to see her, but she wanted to talk to Hitomi. "Psst, Hitomi!"

Hitomi looked around when she heard her name. "Merle, is that you?"

"Yeah, get in here!"

Hitomi gave Van a look and she left his side, going into the room and closing the door. When she got a good look at Merle, she gasped. "What happened to you?!"

"Don't worry about me," Merle said and waved her hand. She pushed Hitomi over to the bed and sat her down. "Is Allen back yet?"

"I don't know...do you want me to ask Van?"

"No. Hitomi, I'm scared," Merle whispered and grasped her friends hands.

Hitomi gave her a confused look and squeezed her hands. "Why?"

"I think Allen left me."

Hitomi snorted loudly. "That's ridiculous. He loves you."

"No, he...has been acting weird lately, and I don't know why. And," she paused, laying her hand on her stomach. "I think I'm pregnant."

"Oh, no. You can't be. You're not married!"

Merle blushed and let go of Hitomi's hands. "As you can see, I am taking this very hard. My hair is a mess and I haven't had a bath in about a week. I feel...sick, which I don't understand because me and Allen...we only did it once and it was at the inn! That was about four weeks ago!"

"Yes, but cats are different than humans, dear. You probably have a much different gestation period than I would. I wonder what your and Allen's kids would look like. Do you have litters like other cats?"

"I'm not that much of a cat!!"

Hitomi smiled briefly before she went back to being serious. "Ok, let's think. After me and Van have lunch, I'm going to come back and get you so you can get examined. Alright? And where have you been?"

Merle pushed her dirty and tangled hair out of her eyes. "I have been sneaking around to rooms no one ever goes in unless there are guests. Everyone thought I ran away."

"Don't worry, Merle. I'll take care of you." Hitomi kissed her cheek and left the room quickly, returning to Van.

"Was that Merle? Why doesn't she come out?" Van asked and heaved himself up off the floor by the doorway.

"She's um, sick. She can't." Technically it was the truth. Van started walking away at her answer and she followed behind him, thinking hard.

They came to the garden and went to the north rose garden. Hitomi squealed when she saw her dragon and she hugged it and petted it like a cat or dog. A pack of servants came out a little bit later with a pile of food. They walked in a totally different direction and Van pursued them, wondering where they were going.

Hitomi went after Van, her dragon coming after her. She turned the corner and saw a small gazebo. "Van, I didn't know that we had a gazebo! It's so cute!"

"I didn't know we had one either, even after all these years of coming to this place. Bizarre."

The servants set their plates, glasses filled with red wine for Van, and water for her highness at the order of Van. A maid laid a light blue napkin on Hitomi's lap and Hitomi thanked her.

Van excused them after they set the food on their plates. He could see that Hitomi was ready to drool. "What did they feed you?"

Hitomi got a disgusted look on her face and she picked up her water. "Medicinal junk that was totally nasty and made me want to gag and puke it up all over the evil healers."

"Evil? Is that what you think of them?" Van asked and dished some food into his mouth, chewed, and closed his eyes.

"Not really, only when they fed me that...evil and vile food. They treat me good though. They seem generally concerned about me."

"You're their queen, that's why. Their future pretty much depends on you."

"How so?" Hitomi asked and chewed whatever kind of meat was on her plate. She shrugged and ate some more.

"You're the one that's going to reproduce aren't you? I would hope that I don't," Van joked and Hitomi almost spit the water she had been drinking all over him. She swallowed and laughed, holding her stomach.

Van looked down at his white shirt when he felt something hit his chest. It appeared that a piece of flying meat had hit him and left a stain.

"Hitomi!" Van laughed and picked up a handful of corn on the corner of his plate. He threw it at her and she jumped up, lifting her robe off her chest because it had gone down her clothes. She shook them out and picked up some of her own corn, throwing it at him too. Van jumped up and scooped his hands in the gravy, hurling it at her. She squealed loudly when it hit her straight in the face. She wiped it off and looked wildly at the assortment of food covering the wooden table. She smiled evilly and picked up a cherry pie. She leaned over the table and smashed it on his chest, rubbing it around and making sure it stuck to his shirt. It fell to the floor and he bent over to pick it up. He dug his hands into it, his palms filed with red cherries. He walked over to her and ran his hands over her face, rubbing the rest off on her shoulders.

She spit it out of her mouth and leaned back over the table, picking up the whole glass container of the light colored gravy. She dumped it on his head. Van smiled at her after he wiped it out of his eyes. Hitomi laughed when she saw the sauce dripping off the tips of his hair.

Van reached for the first bottle of wine sitting by the now empty glass container. He didn't dump it on her head, he lifted her robe and dumped it down her shirt. He shook the last of it out and he heard her gasp, outraged.

She looked for something for her revenge. Her body was now soaking wet and sticky as the hot air filled with humidity dried it. She saw a platter with cheese half-melted sitting on it along with crackers and some dip that she had no idea what was. She smiled and picked up the melted cheese. She rubbed it good and deep into his hair and then picked up the crackers, crumbling them into his hair and rubbing it in with the cheese. She went to reach for the dip, but Van took it first. He poured it into his hands and grinned at her.

Hitomi stiffened when he let it drip off his hands and onto her shoulders, trickling down in between her breasts and around them. Van laughed hysterically and held onto his stomach, pointing at her.

She looked down and saw a veritable river of the dip running down her chest, accenting the already see through robe because of the wine. It wasn't white anymore, it was pink. She picked up the second bottle of red wine and used her teeth to open it, making grunting sounds when it came loose slowly. She grinned and pulled Van over by the top of his pants. His eyes widened when she started to pour it down his pants and he gasped at how cold it was. She let the top of his pants snap back into place and she patted his face, smiling like a witch.

After Van recovered, he looked good and mean. He searched for something else and took the rest of his mutton off his plate. He grinned at her and forced open her mouth, shoving it in and clamping down her jaws. He laughed at the obscene picture his wife presented him with a piece of meat hanging out of her mouth.

"Uhhhhh!!!" she yelled in frustration, spitting it out. Van took off, running away and laughing at her still. Hitomi yelled again ran after him. Her feet were bare and she couldn't run too fast. She could tell that Van wasn't running as fast as he could because it wouldn't be fair to her. He turned a corner and she followed after him. She stopped when she didn't see him anymore. She felt panic go through her and looked more frantically. "Van?"

She walked slowly over the stone walkway and turned around when she heard some movement behind her. Nothing. She twisted around again and walked faster through the garden.

Van smiled and followed right behind her. He had been behind her the whole time, even when she had turned around. His fingers touched her hair and she whipped around. Still nothing.

Van touched his fingers to her ear and she stiffened. "Van? Is that you?"

"No, it's your dragon."

Hitomi turned around and smiled, rolling her eyes. "In a way you are my dragon." She wrapped her arms around him carefully, and when she didn't see any frightening images go through her mind, she hugged him tighter. Van felt all the food covering their bodies squish between them and they both laughed.

"Your highnesses! What happened to you?!!"

Van looked up and saw the annoying General Dunwe. He sighed and held onto Hitomi tighter when she went to turn around. "Don't even think about it in the half naked state you're in," Van whispered in her ear. She smiled and buried her fingers in his food-caked hair. "Now even your hair will taste good," she whispered back to him and Van smiled, shaking his head. He pulled back some and saw the sudden sad look in her eyes.

"What? Did I hurt you?"

Hitomi blinked back the tears. "I can't feel anything," she murmured and walked out of his embrace, back towards the gazebo.

Van cursed and went to follow her, but he heard his general clear his throat. "What?!"

"The knight, Allen Schezar has returned to Fanelia and demands to see the Lady Merle. I was wondering about your wishes on the matter."

"No!!!" Hitomi said loudly and turned around. She looked startled at the tone in her voice. Van ran over to her and scolded her, taking off his food covered shirt. He put it over her shoulders and she gripped it like a lifeline around her. "Why?" Van asked.

"Not yet, Van. I... still have to talk to her about something."

"Well then go talk to her now then. Allen has the right to talk to her if he wants, because she is his fiancée. So hurry up and tell me when you're done."

Hitomi nodded and walked away quickly. Van watched her for a moment and turned back to General Dunwe. "Is there anything else you want to talk about before I leave after my wife?"

"What happened to your hair?"

"Me and my wife had a food fight."

"Oh, well in that case, sorry to disturb you, your highness."

Van nodded and walked back to the palace, going straight to his room to clean off. He didn't dare go right into his bathing room, he washed all the junk out of his hair with the water at his washstand before he did.

"Merle, are you in here?" Hitomi whispered loudly and walked in.

Merle came out of a side door, her hair washed and damp still. She smiled and asked, "Did I hear right? Allen is back?"

"Yes, he is. But we have to go to a healer before you go and see him. And if you are pregnant, we have to get you and him married as soon as possible."

Merle followed her out of the room and Hitomi directed her to her sickroom. Nara was sitting in a wooden chair, writing something down on a piece of paper.

"Nanna? Can you help Merle for me?"

Nara stood up when she heard her baby. She walked over to her and gave her a brief hug before she took Merle's hands. "Well, well, well. I haven't seen you for a while. You have transformed!" She frowned and looked at her more. "Are you pregnant?"

Both Merle and Hitomi gaped at her, wondering how she knew. "That's why we came. Merle doesn't know yet. And she doesn't know too much about everything, it seems. I can't help her because I don't know anything about her kind of anatomy."

Nara nodded and brought Merle into the room more. Hitomi closed the door and went over to the bed with them. She sat Merle on the bed.

"Merle, Hitomi was right to come here because your anatomy is completely different from hers. You might be wondering why you are already feeling sick, and that's because your prenatal development is very different from hers. First of all, you will only be pregnant for seven months."

"Oh."

"May I ask if the individual who got you pregnant is a cat person or human?"

"Human. Will...will my baby look weird because of the different races?"

"Not at all. More than half the time you can't even tell the baby has cat blood in it. Sometimes, but rarely, the baby can have stripes on its body, like on its arms or legs. But like I said, it's rare. So don't worry. Now, let me check you over."

She ordered Merle to lay back and Nara lifted up her gown. Merle got all flustered and blushed a dark red. Nara could tell how embarrassed she was. A second case of embarrassment, she thought. She pushed on her belly, prodding here and there. "Tell me if it hurts, alright?"

Merle nodded and closed her eyes tight. Hitomi smiled at her and took her hand.

There was a brief knock on the door before it was flung open. Allen and Van's smiles fell off their faces when they saw Merle laying on the bed with Nara's hand under her skirt and Hitomi gripping her hand. Merle shot up in bed and screamed. Hitomi jumped up off the bed and ran to the door, slamming it in their shocked faces.

"Oh no!" Merle said, panicked. "Allen is going to know now and...what's he going to do?" she cried and brought her legs up to her chest when Nara slipped her hand out from under her light dress.

Hitomi was furious. What was it with them to just barging in? "Don't worry, Merle. I will kill them."

Merle couldn't help but smile at the overly serious look on Hitomi's face. "Do you think that they saw anything?" Merle asked Nara.

Nara stood and walked over to the washstand to clean her hands. "No, your dress was down and not up about your waist."

Hitomi got up off the bed and marched to the door, flinging it open. Van had his hand raised to knock again and Hitomi glared at him. "Is there something you to morons want that apparently couldn't wait long enough for someone to tell you to come in?"

Allen tried to look into the room, but Hitomi blocked his view. "What was Merle doing? And what was that woman doing to her?"

"Allen, Van, go away before I hurt one of you. You already have Merle upset and now I'm angry."

"We didn't mean to, Hitomi-"

"Well, we wouldn't be going through this right now if you had waited."

"Listen, sweetheart. We didn't mean to-"

He got a door in his face. He muttered something and slumped up against the door. "Great, now she's mad at me. What a wonderful day."

"What do you think is wrong with Merle?"

"She's dying."

Allen paled. "Are you serious?!"

Van snorted. "No, stupid."

Allen wanted to punch him in his pretty little face, but restrained himself. He sat down next to him on the cold wooden floor. The hallway was dark because there were no windows to let light in. "So what do you think is really wrong with her?"

"Upset stomach?"

Allen shrugged and then shook his head. "No, they wouldn't have to examine her like that. I mean, the lady had her hand up her skirt!"

"You mean Nara."

"Whatever!"

"I don't know. So don't ask me."

Allen rested his head against the cool white wall and waited for something to happen.

Van started to tap his fingers on the floor while Allen whistled. Neither of them knew what they were waiting for and almost jumped out of their skin when the door opened and two regal looking women stepped over them, there chins high in the air, ignoring them.

Van looked at Allen and they chased after them, tripping on their own legs in their haste to get to them.

Merle smiled at Hitomi and nodded. Hitomi walked away in the other direction. Allen and Van stopped and looked confused, as if they didn't know which way to go. Van walked after Hitomi after a few seconds, getting the slight confusion cleared from his mind. Allen went after Merle, trying to figure some way to tell her how sorry he was.

"Hitomi, what's going on?"

Hitomi didn't look at him, she just kept staring straight a head of her and walked to her old room were she could take a bath and get a clean pair of clothes. She turned the knob to her door and opened it, closing it right in Van's face. He lowered the hand that went to knock on the door and he sighed. Women were too complicated sometimes. He went into his own room and plopped onto the bed. He was unbelievably tired and felt his eyes drift closed. He dozed off, his body spread out and covering half the bed.

Hitomi felt filthy and didn't want to know how she smelled. No one had said anything about what she had looked like, and she was grateful. She didn't want to explain the hilarious food fight her and Van had had.

She scrubbed her hair until her scalp burned and washed her body until her skin was pink. She didn't want to get out of the warm water, she just wanted to go to sleep in it. It was deliciously warm, just like Van. Hey, she thought, sitting up in the water. Why stay in here when she could just go to Van?

She hurried out of the water and dried herself with the soft green towel that had been lying by the pool. She wondered how there was always a new and different towel there every time.

She went into her room and pulled out a drawer with her nightgowns in it. She pulled out the same flimsy one she had had on the night Van proposed to her. She loved the way it made you look like you were floating. She yawned and walked back into the bathing room to get to Van's. She opened the door a crack to see if he was even in there. Sure enough, he was spread out on the bed like the world was his and his alone. She smiled at the thought and tiptoed over to the bed, crawling onto the bed and coming next to Van. She didn't want to take the chance with the images going through her mind so she stayed away from him. She didn't want to, but she had no choice. She sighed. She missed him holding her and keeping her warm and safe.

Van opened his eyes when he felt the bed shift and stared at Hitomi's back swathed in white fragile trappings. He didn't think and pulled her up against him, molding her up against his body and wrapping his arm around her waist. She stiffened only for a moment and Van said, "I am never going to let you go ever again."

Hitomi relaxed at his loving words and covered his hand on her waist with hers, falling asleep listening to his deep breathing.