Vision Of Escaflowne Fan Fiction ❯ When We Meet Again *~* ❯ Into the Night Sky ( Chapter 15 )

Chapter 15: Into the Night Sky

The sleek gold wasn't even close to faded, still that gorgeous burnt yellow surrounding the continuous loop. There were no gems encrusted, but that didn't take away from its truly inspiring image seeing as, after all, it was a male's ring and such pretty things as diamonds or sapphires weren't entirely necessary if not strange altogether. Because of that, the handsome piece of jewellery was much too large to fit on any one of Catherine's fingers, and it wasn't like she would have been disrespectful enough to wear it anyway. She didn't even feel that it was morally right to even touch it, and if not for the fact that the kitchen counter needed a bad cleaning, she would have simply left it in its place. The ring, all alone in its miniature simplicity, was a very powerful symbol of a path she could not tread. Plainly saying, it wasn't her business and Catherine hadn't been around long enough to demand it to become her business, as much as she wanted it to be.

Suddenly, the sound of the opening bedroom door alerted her panic, forcing Catherine Corain to quickly yet gently drop the ring onto the surface of the dining room table, trying to claim for her innocence as if she hadn't been doing anything. To be honest, she really hadn't been doing anything but transferring the item to a safer place, but even then she didn't want to explain all that to her traumatized roommate. It was an uncomplicated thought that still purely frightened Catherine - the thought of facing Hitomi Kanzaki.

But to Catherine's mortified relief, Hitomi was actually not the one to walk through the bedroom door at all. Instead, it was Yukari Uchida filled with a look of disdain disappointment, dark rings encircling her eyes to prove just how tired she was. Cathy didn't blame her to the least bit, feeling she had to constantly stifle off a yawn every other minute in this strenuous early time of morning. Already complete with slick, yellow gloves and frilly apron made from her mother, Cathy had about a three-hour head start on her annual Saturday weekend cleanings. It really wasn't that early, only about eight or so fresh in the morning, but to a pair of university seniors edging onto finals, sleeping in on a Saturday was an absolute must, if not a requirement for one's health and sanity. But Catherine couldn't help but notice how easily distracted she was getting from her dusting and mopping (keeping in mind that Cathy at her work was rather difficult to distract) as her eyes had kept peeled to that bedroom door. Now, as agonizing minutes later, Cathy couldn't help but share Yukari's miserable disappointment. This morning was truly going nowhere.

Yukari looked aimlessly at Cathy, the tray with the hot bowl of oatmeal and fresh glass of orange juice still sitting untouched where it was within her arms. She gave Catherine a hopeless dimmed glance complete with an exhausted sigh.

"She's not hungry."

"Poor girl," Catherine matched that sigh and retrieved the tray from Yukari, placing it gently against the dining table, covering the uneaten food with a plastic lid, while shooing the curious white Naria away. She managed to catch a glimpse of the ring once again, thinking to herself just how long Yukari had been inside that room with Hitomi. It probably hadn't been more than five minutes.

"Did you get to tell her about how those two kids came by yesterday?"

Yukari nodded her head slightly, pulling back a dining chair and collapsing her weight into it. She couldn't get Hitomi's distraught image out of her mind, and all of these happenings combined made her feel really and truly helpless. Yukari just didn't know what to do. There were so many things to do, but she couldn't find the heart or nerve in her to confront Hitomi on any of these things.

"It was that bad, huh?" Catherine plodded into her thoughts, removing her waxy yellow gloves and sitting herself adjacent to Yukari. Yukari looked purely exhausted, head in hands with fingers seaming through her layered hair every once and a while. The thing was, Catherine knew that all of that exhaustion was not from physical activity at all, but the tense emotional activity of everything that was occurring and had occurred.

"Yeah," Yukari lifted her chin to stare at Catherine with a grimacing look. "Man, Cath, what are we to do? She's not gonna get out a bed, hell, the girl won't even eat and I ain't gonna barge right in there and force her to either."

Catherine nodded sadly; disappointed to know Hitomi was as much of a mess as she had feared. It was such a complicated problem that even in this past hour, neither Catherine nor Yukari could devise a full-proof way to successfully confront it. There were so many questions that they just shouldn't ask, and there were so many problems that they just couldn't solve. Yet, if these two -- the few that weren't plagued by emotional distress -- could not resolve this climatic situation, then honestly, who could? Just what could they do to fix something that was not their business, yet all the same a major factor in their lives and daily activities? Thus, the girls would have to remain indecisive for just a little longer.

"I'm sorry Catherine," Yukari sighed miserably, glancing every so often in Hitomi's bedroom door's direction, hoping for a sign of life to erupt from it. "I really suck at this kind of stuff. I didn't even get the guts to work up enough courage to ask her about last night. I couldn't do it. You have to see her, Cathy, it's unbelievable."

Cathy let out a breath. She had caught a momentary glimpse of Hitomi just last night, and if that's how upset the girl was then, then she just didn't want to know how Hitomi looked now.

"Maybe you should try," Yukari looked to Catherine with hopeful eyes. "I just don't know what to say. Well, I do know what to say, but I just can't say it, you know?"

"I know what you mean," Catherine agreed, fingering the ring once again as she saw it still lying by her hands. "But I don't know how much help I can be. I don't want to really say anything, because I haven't known her too long."

"Don't worry about that," Yukari forced a smile past her dismay. "Hitomi gets along with you just fine, better than so much other people actually. I don't think she'll get upset at either of us, but you're right, she's still in a very unapproachable state right now."

"Just what did she say to you?"

"Oh…" Yukari bit her lip wishing she didn't have to recall Hitomi's broken image. Moreover, she didn't like recalling Hitomi's broken voice trying to hide the wailing tears she had been shedding hour after hour. Even as concealed as the young woman was in that room, her vibes of utter sadness were still plainly easy to detect.

"She didn't say much at all. Hitomi was tucked up to her chin in covers and facing the wall, so I couldn't see her either. I just asked if she was all right, she said yes, and then I told her about the boy and that girl that visited yesterday. She didn't respond so I just said you had breakfast made. She mumbled something or other that she wasn't hungry and I could only stand to tell her we'd be there for her if she needs us, before getting out of that room."

Yukari smiled a bit, a smile that was not a sign of gladness, but a symbol of musing on just how desolately impossible this situation was, "You won't believe how depressive it is in there, Cathy. I can't go in there again. I just had to get out."

"Don't blame yourself, I know it's a lot to absorb," Cathy tried to share a supportive smile; appreciative that at least Yukari had had enough courage to try and approach their unstable friend. Although Catherine was usually labeled as the brave one in tense situations, emotional situations were another story she did not like to read. She could barely even sleep last night, the hours easily slipping her by as she lay just constantly worrying for the sake of her new companions. The tone of Amano and Hitomi's last heated words to each other rang disturbingly through her mind and thoughts and memories. Catherine had been the only one who witnessed it, seeing as Yukari and San had already been dropped off home to the appropriate places, and of course she had been returning after parking Amano's vehicle back in the guest lot. It had been then that she approached the door of 5B, hearing unsettling and thrashing words from within her own home, knowing things had not gone well at all in her absence. She couldn't explain the reasoning or the cause, but all Cathy knew was the second she got that door open, Amano had taken his car keys off her and disappeared instantly, leaving Hitomi in the most weeping, pitiful state she has ever been in. It was an unimaginable situation, pure discomfort and lack of knowledge on just about everything. Hitomi's distraught image was just so damn torn, that even the usual empathetic Catherine could not handle sharing such emotions. Thus, the two had gone to bed without many words, leaving the night and the following day to be as troubling as ever can be.

"Hah, what are we gonna do now..." Yukari shook her head, wondering still when she would awake from this nightmare. She was thankful however that she wasn't as worse off as Catherine. Yukari was often miserable at the fact that her parents had purchased her that condominium apartment way out near Tsutomu Lake, since her and Hitomi had been planning to be roommates since they were little high school fledglings, and Hitomi just couldn't afford splitting the cost of the condo. However, in the case of last night, Yukari being independently stuck in her own home was a fortunate case, seeing as she could only sympathize for Cathy who had to struggle with this dilemma straight through the night hours. Yukari had only been informed of the problem early this morning, when Cathy's urgent phone call had awakened her and after hearing of the situation, she had climbed aboard the first train headed to Greenwood station. Even though Yukari had known both Amano and Hitomi for what seemed like forever to her, something of this unpredicted and climatic measure would be much too much for her to bear. This had never happened before between any of them, ever! Sure, there were squirmishes such as the one between her and Hitomi a few years back, but each of those things were usually based on immature feelings fueled by anger with a lifespan no longer than that of a fruit fly. This, however, was so much different of a case. If left untreated, a problem such as this would not only take a large toll on everybody involved, but also it would probably be something that could and eventually would scar all three of them for life. Every year it was always the same, Christmas reunions and birthday parties, these three - all together, all the time. Of course as the years went on situations changed and they matured and relationships matured with new ones added, such as with Cathy and San, and this was the routine of life. At least, it's what she knew of life. Yukari wasn't naive; she knew that there would eventually be problems between each of them, especially Amano and Hitomi with all of their upcoming commitments. But this wasn't a problem. This was a full-fleshed out situation. This was an issue, focusing not only how it was to be resolved, but also how it would stay resolved. Truly, her words make entire sense... what were they to do now?

"So have you talked to Amano yet?" Catherine desperately tried to clear the silence. It was creepy and unusual, and she only wished it were but another morning where she could play her favorite Selena tracks at full blast to her and Hitomi's enjoyment, while they would feast on an entrée of different cereals from just about everywhere. Those were the norms of practically every weekend morning in the last month or so, having Cathy dusting something or baking something, Hitomi trying her luck out with Spanish song lyrics and ending up playing "Dreaming of You" instead to cheat off with the English dialogue, and Naria probably just eating her kibbles and shedding more white fur to Catherine's distaste. That had been so normal, so predicted, so taken for granted. How she would give up anything to go back there a second time. She was just thankful that her and Yukari were on their spring holidays, for if school were to be involved it would be exceedingly difficult to try and solve this problem from a distance.

"Hell no," Yukari scoffed to Cathy's inquiry, miffed at the very thought of Amano Nekuchi at such a time. "This is probably all of his fault for all ya know. The guy can be such a jack-ass, I swear."

"You really think he started this?" Catherine asked questionably, remembering Amano's angered image whisk by her last night. An image as upset as that one would need a cause to be angry, he would need a reason to be as mad as he was and Hitomi was the only one who could possibly be the answer to that pondering.

"Well..." Yukari's voice trailed, feeling her breath draw in memory and thought. "It's probably my fault too."

"Your fault?" Cathy looked to her curiously, swallowing silently. Why did she just get such an awful feeling upon hearing that?

"Yeah," Yukari nodded as if in disappointment of herself. "Yukari the idiot huh?"

"Hey, don't say that," Cathy assured sympathetically. "None of this is your fault, Yukari! Why do you think you're involved?"

"Because," she muttered lamely in reply, beginning to easily convince herself that it was her fault. "Don't you remember when I called Amano yesterday? Right after those two strange kids left?"

"Right..."

"Well, I told him, not about those two kids, but about Hitomi.. leaving us that is. I told him about how she woke up yesterday morning all out of it and everything and how she hadn't returned yet. Then he checked his messages at that time and heard this disturbing phone call that Hitomi had made an hour or so earlier. I really wanted to tell you and San about it last night but I was afraid I would only complicate an unwanted situation. Seems a little late for that now."

"Wait a minute," Cathy thought of such things for a second. "But none of these things could have gotten Amano that mad. Was it that disturbing phone call or something that could have tipped him off the edge?"

"Probably, probably that and what I told him of the phone call. See, it was from Hitomi calling from the Ramada. That's where she was last night."

"Where is that?"

"Oh, it's a well-known hotel downtown, I had NO idea why Hitomi would be there and neither did Amano, and moreover I only wonder how she got there because she had no money on her that I remember, and downtown is a good way off from here on foot. Anyway, that's besides the point. She had left a message saying she badly needed Amano's help; some friend of hers had just been in accident."

"Oh my Lord, that's horrible!"

"I know! But he got the message way too late, and his machine had cut her off before she could leave him a way to contact her, seeing as she didn't have her cell. I thought about it for a while... and I just... I just kinda knew who that "friend" must have been. So I told him."

Catherine nodded, starting to actually understand the basic foundation of all of the complications, "This is what got Amano upset, I presume?"

"Well, I think, that is assuming that we're right - assuming that Hitomi had been going downtown to visit... Van Fanel. I mean it sounds crazy, hell yeah, but I kept thinking of those two kids and how they were telling us these impossible things about how they came here with that Van guy, and Hitomi had mentioned wanting to see someone right before she left yesterday. All these things put together made the answer more clearer than crystal, you know?"

"Definitely," Catherine made a heave of a sigh, feeling this problem truly was exerting to the very limits that problems have.

"But that's still weird..." Yukari mused suddenly. "I mean, Amano didn't sound too upset on the phone, he was more worried for Hitomi's safety and Van's safety actually! I didn't tell him about those kids, and I especially didn't mention how they said this Van guy loved Hitomi, I'm not that stupid. Hitomi would have to fess up about that on her own, so I'm not sure why Amano would be so upset... I mean that's crazy! In all of these years I've never heard of him being so mad, it truly isn't like him. He's never even raised his tone with her I don't think... much less do something like he did last night."

"I guess all of the reasons we won't know unless we ask," Catherine stated the inevitable tapping her fingers against the dining table in hopelessness. "And I doubt either of us have what it takes to ask Hitomi, do we?"

"I sure as hell can't," Yukari mumbled in desperation. "And honestly, maybe we shouldn't be poking around just yet anyway. This may root down deeper than we know and if that's the case I don't look forward to making anything worse."

"Yeah, you're right, I--" Catherine was just about to finish her agreement before the sharp tone of a ringing phone jostled through the morning air.

The two remained awkwardly still for a second as the ring went on its third call, each knowing that there was a cord phone in Hitomi's bedroom by where her alarm radio had once been, both wondering if she would be the first to answer it.

The phone rang for the fifth time.

"I got it," Cathy uttered, wishing she didn't have to answer it and just let it be, but she didn't want the piercing sound of the ringing telephone annoying Hitomi in there, or stressing her out. Of course Catherine went after the cord phone by the kitchen, not even wishing to tiptoe into Hitomi's bedroom for the other one.

The phone rang for the sixth time as Cathy kind of oddly stared at it, a thousand case scenarios flooding her head. What if it was someone who wanted to speak to Hitomi? Would Cathy lie and say the girl was busy? But then, what if it was urgent? Hell, what if it was Amano?! What on earth would she do then!

The phone rang for the seventh time, and Catherine (who was adequately disappointed that the other end hadn't hung up yet) grabbed the receiver and sort of held it, afraid to face the other line yet wishing for the telephone's nuisance noise to shut up. "Heeeellloooo..." a dimmed female voice called from within the receiver, which Cathy held about a foot away from her face. "Hello? Anyone there? Or is it 'konnichiwa'? Uh oh.. Mrs. Kanzaki!!! What do I say? 'Hello' or 'konnichiwa'?? Moshi what?? Moshi moshi? Is that what I say? Oh okay, thanks, moshi moshi anyone home? And don't expect me to say that in Japanese because that's just asking for miracles!"

Even at the drabness of today's ups and downs, particularly downs, Cathy had to bite her lip from laughing at San's aloofness, easily portrayed via telephone apparently. She couldn't believe how relived she was to hear San Askielowicz (probably the only person who could receive so much culture shock in such a short amount of time) rather than all of the possible things Cathy had conjured up in her mind.

"Hello San, it's Cathy. You don't know how incredibly funny you sound."

"Oh please Cathy," San bickered laughingly in defense happy to know that someone had actually picked up. "You were a foreigner too just a month ago, don't forget that!"

"I won't..." Catherine smiled. Poor San, she was so very lighthearted it was almost hurtful to hear such a happy tone, knowing that one way or another; San's joyous mood would have to be brought down with some complicated news.

"Who is it?" Yukari asked curiously leaning herself against the refrigerator as she approached. She too was enormously thankful that it sure didn't sound like Amano by Cathy's more friendly expression.

"Oh Yukari, San's on the phone--" She tried to answer before being cut off by the tiny voice in the receiver.

"Yukari's there too? Hey Cathy! What are you guys planning this fun day without me? Can I join in? Pleeease? Please, please, please, please and please?"

Yukari had to hold back a smile too, able to hear San's accentuated words without even being near the telephone. She looked to Catherine sensing that smile fading, remembering that on their innocent drive home last night, they had been planning for a fun-filled girls' day out today with Hitomi, had things not gone so morbidly wrong.

Cathy returned Yukari's confounded expression, lying with the thoughts: "Who should break the news? You or me?"

Yukari, whom Catherine noticed had picked up the golden ring from the table, stared at it inanely and nodded in Cathy's direction, symbolizing that this was one challenge she was willing to face.

"Hey San, it's Kari." Her voice was drab, trying to foreshadow what she eventually would have to say.

"Yukari! Nice to hear from you! Where'd Cathy go? Well, anyway are you guys still up for breakfast ice-cream or what? You guys like gotta totally remind me what the hot spots in Aimsa are, I forgot like ten years ago!"

"Well, actually San," Yukari sighed twirling the cord looking at Catherine helplessly, both wishing that the situation was as fun and exciting as San made it seem. "We really gotta cancel that."

"Seriously?" San began to pick up on the dark and bleak tone. "Cancel everything you mean? Did I miss something?"

"A lot..." Yukari hushed under her breath, glancing at the ring lying within her palms.

"Well, c'mon Kari, spill, this sounds bad."

"Oh but it is. Prepare yourself San, this will be a story you won't like to hear."

* * *

He observed curiously as she knead the dough perfectly, fine hands working like a well-oiled machine. Rhythmic yet fast paced, it wasn't hard to see just how she managed to get everything done. The young woman, not yet past her early thirties, was just so well organized and functioned incredibly systematically, so much so that things and jobs and duties became accomplished without hesitation. However, because of such responsibilities and demands, Angela Ferentini's youth was far from obvious. It was easy to assume she was a few years ahead than what she actually was, because of all the markings time and stress had given her. From all of the dishwashing and cooking, and also cleaning as the high school custodian, Angela's hands wore soft wrinkles along the backs and across her palms. Her hair was never fancy much, pale to dirty blonde ringlets usually tied back in a copious bunch with strands sometimes running down the sides of her pretty face. Although work and worries often did get to her, Shied could tell there was not one challenge that could take away from his Mum's beauty. Her eyes, an amazing azure, were always lively and encouraging, sometimes strict and glaring with command, but always encouraging. Not a hint or hue of makeup would touch her elegant skin, and even when Shied would propose on buying her a cosmetic set along with his Aunt Milerna's, he knew his Mum would only refuse. She was a natural woman who heeded not to the concerns of the outside, but stayed only on the inside with what was important to her. She wore her lips thin, pressed usually in a handsome form never really displaying much on emotion, but every once in a while they would trickle on a smile like no other. Her smile was like brilliance to him, like laughing sunshine to light his days this long, past year. He didn't remember seeing the days come and go as rapidly as they had, for that warm and loving smile was the only thing that would fill his memories of this short yet marvelous time.

"Boy, why you just standing there?" Without even having to turn her back, Angela Ferentini could sense Shied's soft eyes, inspecting her in his astounded silence. A lot of the time, she would question why he would just sometimes sit and look at things, but Shied said he wasn't looking; he was studying, pondering, thinking. She would usually just laugh and go on about her business, but inside a flicker of pride would grow within her, amazed herself to know a boy so young would already possess an ingenious intellectuality that she could only admire. Her little Shied was just so clever.

Wondering why he was slow to respond, Angela reached over and put the stove to low heat, avoiding the spitting crackle of the eggs licking against the oil sending spurts of hot liquid flying rapidly through the air. Trying to calm down the cooking scenario with a spatula in one hand and the panhandle in the other, she finally turned in his direction.

Shied smiled at her curious eyes, still wordless.

"What'cha thinkin' of?" She said, softer this time, keeping her glance on him as the oil war simmered down. Usually, when Shied would just be hanging around doing nothing, she would get him up and going on some chore that was to be done to keep the child busy. It wasn't that she was trying to be hard on him, but Angela secretly understood that Shied liked doing things for her; it was something he wasn't used to. She figured, seeing as he was raised as pampered royalty growing up, Shied was fond of leading what seemed to him like a normal life. She knew he found it more amusing to crack open eggs and measure the brown sugar to make peanut butter cookies, than to analyze which citizens were due with taxes or which roadways called for repair. But for some reason, this time, Angela wasn't going to request anything of Shied. She didn't want him to be busy and distracted, and to instead keep her company as he was, for this day was different. This day was very special.

"You're making panserotti?" He questioned sitting by her on a small stool by the kitchen counter, watching as she centered some tomato paste and chunks of vegetables in the middle of the circular form of dough.

"Um hum," she nodded smiling kindly at him, then added, "your favorite."

"Oh! But they all are!" He exclaimed suddenly in reply, realizing for the first time that the enormous mounds of prepared foods lying throughout the counter top were all of his most preferred dishes. Currently she was working away at her fourth panserotti, a chocolate cake was just about finished with baking, unopened cartons of Chinese food were waiting to be eaten, five or six fresh mangos lay ready to be sliced and served and many more things his eyes could only feast upon and his mouth could only drool at the sight of. Why, Angela must have been up way early that morning to get a head start on all of these mouth-watering, stomach-grumbling foods, either that or she had been planning this for much longer than he knew.

"Mum! You're so nice!" His sapphire eyes lit with his words, filled with energy. "May I help?"

"Of course honey!" Angela laughed mildly, delighted to know he was no short of excited to her cooking contribution, and that she had gotten him so warped with doing chores and household work, that he was voluntarily requesting to join in all by himself.

"But don't you forget about your friends," Dusting off her floured hands on her apron, Angela tilted her head in the direction of the kitchen doorway. "They're probably just waking up, they must be parched. Sleeping on the sofa is no fun duty."

"Should I get them each a glass of apple or orange juice?"

"Apple's out hon, but orange should do fine. You can tell them good morning for me and breakfast should be served shortly, I just gotta get them pancakes done. Please and thank you Shied. I'll make some chocolate pancakes just for you."

"No problem," Shied nodded obediently, secretly delighted to hear of his favourite style pancakes being specially prepared, skipping off his stool and fetching two glasses. As he managed to weasel through the small kitchen towards the refrigerator, he couldn't help but think of his Mum's words she had spoken about a month ago, which were now strong within his thoughts, ever since he had awaken this morning. It still hadn't slipped his mind, and he had been thinking of them every second after they had been uttered. They had been powerful, commanding; yet in all of their entirety, they were sad and touching and thought-provoking. It was just like Angela to try to put up a strong front, and look as if she were only saying the words because she had to, but both her and Shied knew what lay beyond orders and nods. That night, she had asked him kindly that when the day would come, that they would not speak a word of sadness or grief. She had specifically instructed him that that day would be special, but not sad. His Mum had said she wanted to see no tears or feel no pain. It was kind of ironic actually, because that night, Shied could have sworn he had heard her crying...

The eggs were cooked now, bringing a silence to the ever-bustling kitchen, only filled with the soft morning noises of Angela measuring out the pancake mix or Casey meowing and profusely rubbing her ankles in demand to be fed. In all of its simplicity, it sure looked like the average morning to Shied, especially in these past few weeks since his adopted mother had allowed him to stay home from school. His Mum was working so diligently now, knowing that she had double the amount of people to feed, and also because of reasons that neither her nor Shied wanted to fully address. He didn't want to and wasn't going to question just why she was making all of his favorite meals and not asking him to vacuum or sweep the house, because both her and Shied knew why. This day was special, and that was all there was to it. Although the two of them tried so hard to conceal whatever they thought and go about as if it were a day like any other, the little actions and insignificant things were just what symbolized how different these precious last hours would come to be.

Angela lifted her head slightly, as she carefully poured the pancake mixture into the pan and smiled at Shied. The smile was comforting, yet he could simply sense that it was also weak and frail. He knew she was thinking of the very same things, of just how special everything was.

* * *

"You have to be kidding me," San whispered the words quietly, trying to be optimistic in her words but sensing her tone was even more depressive and anxious than before. San knew what she was like when she worried over something: she would pull back her hair furiously with her hands and her words would stutter and become somewhat repetitive, just as she was doing now. She couldn't come to familiarize with any sort of happiness or joking behavior in Yukari Uchida's voice. It was all serious, so serious that she just didn't want to accept it anymore.

"I can't believe this. You mean Amano just left her, like that??"

"We don't' really know for sure," Yukari replied hesitantly from the other end, hands still examining the yellow loop lying against her palm. "And trust me, I doubt we'll ever know the full details on exactly what happened, but he left his ring here if that's evidence enough."

"His engagement band?" San's eyes widened and her words lowered in volume at saying such things, feeling that reality was nothing but utterly horrible. "That's terrible."

"It is," Yukari couldn't help but agree, nudging the cord phone against her shoulder as she leant her weight against the wall. She had just managed to succeed in what she didn't want to do, which was to totally break down San's spirit second after second. It was hard to even imagine that the girl had called full of good and happy intentions, seeming more colourful than a rainbow or even brighter than a firefly. Her personality glowed in that way, lively and vivacious, but anybody that was anybody couldn't resist but to drop down in mood when it came to discussing the issue at hand. She couldn't think of or come with anyone who would be smiling at a time as trying and confusing as this.

"Does she have any ideas?" Cathy inquired from beside her as she mopped the kitchen floor to what Yukari recalled must have been the third time in just that hour. She had known from Hitomi's once happy stories that Catherine was something of a clean freak, but even then the floor couldn't be shinier if the girl were to go down on her knees and were to wax and polish it for fifty days on end. Then again, Yukari also knew that in times of tribulation many people did repetitively what they did best or at least what they can do, which is probably why Yukari had been playing around with the inanimate ring for so long, just because for a few seconds it could provide a minor distraction from all of the arising problems, just as Cathy found the continuous cleaning of the floor to bring Hitomi and Amano's situation a little further from her mind.

"Sorry, I'm fresh out," San had overheard Catherine's question, taking in a heave of a deep breath. What kind of idea would anybody have at this time anyway? Even if she thought about it, San knew she wouldn't be able to devise a plan or action that could possibly bring about a good scenario in this case. The most any of them could do that would neither be beneficial nor distracting would be just to stand or sit and do inane things just like they were already doing. It may seem lazy and uncaring, but truthfully, it was the only thing they could do without risking on making matters worse. If those two girls were to confront Hitomi, they would be taking the chance on upsetting her and making San's cousin even more depressed, and if they were to try to get something out of Amano, chances are such uncalled for actions might entice his anger. The separated couple were at totally different ends of the spectrum at the time, and it seemed as if the three confounded bridesmaids lay smack in the middle.

Catherine paused her cleaning to contemplate for a second, noticing anyway that her mop was literally dry after having encircled most of the house four or five times already. She lay her chin above her yellow latex hands which lay just on top of the mop handle (seeing as Catherine was barely a foot taller than her cleaning utensil). She couldn't help but notice the way Yukari simply stood where she was, no notion of communication coming from her and not a peeping sound emitting from a tiny voice on the other line. It surely did seem as if simultaneously all three of them had smashed right into a mental dead end. But there had to be a way out of this, if not an easy solution, than possibly even a difficult one would put an end or at least commence an ending to these rather complicated problems. It was only the matter of which of these not-so-easy solutions did they want to take on first.

"You're thinking what I'm thinking, aren't you?" Yukari looked to Catherine, noticing that same grimacing yet accepting glance glower upon her face. It was the look of someone, of anyone, who just didn't want to do what was truly unavoidable. Catherine and Yukari knew that as their duty as devout bridesmaids and having been friends with Hitomi and Amano for however long, it was their absolute responsibility to fix what they could in any way they can, even if the only methods possible may risk making the situation even worse.

"Do we have any choice?" Catherine verbalized her thoughts in hopelessness. "If we don't go up to her now, things will only be left unanswered for all of us."

"You're right, I know," Yukari sighed an agree. It seemed as if the deal were struck, subconsciously even. Whether they liked it or not, whether she would like it or not, Hitomi Kanzaki would be the person Cathy and Yukari would soon have to face.

"You've guys thought of something?" San's voice piped up from the other end, as she practically had to contain herself from tearing off a fingernail with her teeth. This suspense was truly getting to her; after all, San had thought it would be marvelous being allowed to stay in Aimsa for as long as she would be because of the supposed "peace" and "fun" of the idea. She had had such great hopes for these weeks before the wedding, knowing that she could be involved in not just the one-time ceremony, but all of the pre-planning and flutters of excitement and anticipation with her utmost favorite cousin and friends. That's exactly how San had envisioned it in her mind, picture perfect, as many imagined daydreams come to be. Really, it hadn't seemed too farfetched at the time. It wasn't her fault she hadn't thought of inserting a half-human and half-cat species in there, or maybe angry fiancés who looked more irritated with their own lovers than anything else. It's not to say that San didn't know how to handle a problem, or didn't expect problems once in a while, but truthfully and honestly this had to be the single one problem where she neither saw it coming or knew just how to go about it.

"I think we have to talk to her," Yukari stated what even her lips had to struggle to say. She didn't like knowing the fact, much the less speaking it into the open air, but there was no denying that if they wanted to help, they should not be afraid to help. Whatever may come, they could always still congratulate themselves for at least trying and attempting a solution.

"You're going to talk with her? Have you lost it? I thought you said she was in a sour mood," San couldn't quite come to believe their intentions. Sure, it did spare her from having to be in the confrontation too, but still it didn't seem like a logical decision. She knew well that when Hitomi did not want to talk, the girl would not come to even utter a word. Although Hitomi was almost always pleasant and cooperative, she was still a human being and her downsides would sometimes become apparent just like with anybody else.

"Like Cathy said, we don't have much of a choice," Yukari answered, hesitant with the words the longer time went by. "I mean, it's at least me and Cath here -- there's two of us. It may make her feel better or worse to have two shoulders to cry on... but we can't just leave her in there crying all by herself..."

"True, San regrettably agreed, feeling the words were wheedled out of her in defeat. Yukari and Catherine were there with Hitomi as of now, so honestly they were probably the only ones who could estimate just how approachable Hitomi was at this time, and if they felt that they might be productive in confronting her, then who was San to object? After all, she was here in her Aunt Hikoro Kanzaki's home, a short way away but still quite far enough to be unable to make much of a difference in that confrontation. She didn't want to label herself as useless (although she couldn't quite help that since, being the newcomer, she had barely any knowledge on the turbulent rise and falls of these relationships) but it was also equally hard to provide any helpful insight. She wanted to recall a time when she could remember her cousin being so upset, so utterly miserable, but San highly doubted that Hitomi's skinned knees or that one bad report card could adequately match up to the high standards that were set by this problem. This situation was unparalleled by any other, at such a magnitude of its own that any action would probably be more ineffective than beneficial or destructive. Just what did they have to lose?

"How are we gonna do this?" Catherine couldn't help but input, wondering if she was actually curious enough to plan out a strategy, or if she was just finding ways to buy herself time from the dreading moment.

"She sounds awake enough to talk with us," Yukari thought aloud. "So we'll just have to go in there, as kindly as possible, and ask whatever comes to mind first."

"Just how unstable is she?" San couldn't help but worriedly ponder.

"Let's just say out of all the things Hitomi's emotions has put her though," Yukari stated dryly remembering clearly all of those things. "This has to be the worst of them all."

"Wow... I see..." San answered, feeling a little distracted from the full response she had wanted to say as she heard soft footsteps behind her. Hitomi's old home had been so quiet; she hadn't realized her talking echoed easily. She had noticed too when she had first arrived that the Kanzaki residence was almost a mirror-image of what it was like back when she had last visited a few years ago. Its look had never changed or retired, much to her delight since she could find it so familiar. Everything still had a touch of Hitomi in it, even though that girl herself had been gone for a year going to two now. San held her hand over the receiver with her palm, as she turned to face behind her.

Hikoro Kanzaki was up and about, aged but pretty face smiling at her niece. Her worn, graying black hairs hidden in a mound of towel sat upon her head, as she had just emerged from a morning shower. San could still identify without difficulty the facial similarities that Hitomi and Hikoro shared. It wasn't so much eye colour or hair colour, but the round, gentle way of their eyes or their soft, fine skin that held the most similarities. San knew that most of Hitomi's Caucasian attributes came directly from her late father, of whom they both slightly remembered from their younger days when San would come to visit with her mother, Kassa Askielowicz. They would not only come to visit Hitomi and Hikoro, but also Hitomi's father, Paul Askielowicz, who was Kassa's brother and San's uncle, and the reason why they were related to Hitomi in the first place. It was when both San and Hitomi reached the age of nine when their relationship was equally strengthened. San's father, Anthony Woitowicz, had divorced her mother and so Kassa took custody and since then both San and Kassa have been using their maiden names. The same went with Hitomi when, in the same year, her father, San's uncle, had died in a tragic plane crash. It had hit Hikoro like a lightning bolt, so much to the extreme where San remembered that she had kept it secret from Hitomi for almost five months. San's mother Kassa was burdened by it too, after having been in a recent divorce and now having lost her only brother. It had been then that the Askielowicz family had came to Aimsa and stayed for near to three depressing months. It had been San's worst visit ever to Japan, remembering being so young and having to face Hitomi who looked more broken than shattered glass. That had been the day of Paul Askielowicz's funeral, or more so memorial, with San's mother mourning over the loss of her brother, and Hikoro and Hitomi being much beyond consolation. It had been so trying for the two... but Hikoro Kanzaki had always been a strong woman. Hitomi grew up without a hint of fault within her, and the next time San had visited it was like things were normal again. Hikoro was tough with Hitomi, yet she was wise. Still, even with that thought in mind, San had a hard time imagining that Hikoro Kanzaki wasn't really a blood relative of hers. Although she didn't get the chance to visit often, the Kanzakis were as close to family to her as any of her relatives had ever been, if not closer.

Now, Hikoro's smile was gentle, much like San's had once been before the "news" had been broken to her. If anything, San hoped that Hikoro would never find out about it, or else it might just be like living the exterior trauma of that heart-wrenching memorial all over again. It was such a pity; San had thought this visit would be the most perfect of them all. Never did she realize just how extremely difficult that perfection is to attain.

"Is that Hitomi on the phone?" Hikoro inquired, slowly unwrapping the towel as strands of wet black came falling down her face, lined with soft yet wrinkling smiles. "I hope you girls have fun today, but tell Hitomi, Yukari and Catherine to drop by here first together and pick up you and the Hyundai. It'll be no fun if you all have to take the train to get around, and since Yukari and Catherine can drive, you girls can have the car all day if you'd like."

San couldn't help but pause, feeling her heart flutter sadly at such joy-affiliated words in which she would usually throw a fit of happiness, as her eyes fell upon the white phone cradled on her shoulder. Yukari hadn't piped a word just yet on the other end, and San couldn't help but allow her hand to slip off the receiver to make the girl aware of the stuck situation San was in.

"Ummm.... I...." San could hear herself stammering, practically stuttering again, knowing she was in a fetish for words that didn't exist. She couldn't make up an excuse in fast enough time that wouldn't involve flat-out lying. San more or less liked to avoid topics rather than lie about them, but San also knew that Hikoro was a very straightforward and disciplined person as she always has been. There had never been a day when San would have stayed over and her and Hitomi would successfully get away with anything. Hikoro, like many mothers, had a round the clock watch and omniscient knowing on the happenings of her children and all who they related with.

"As a matter of fact," Hikoro continued, placing the towel on top of the sofa and motioning to San to hand her the telephone, much to San's dismay, "I do need to speak to her myself. That girl needs a good talking. I told her to call Timothy and Alexandra about a million times now but the girl is getting careless with her duties... so close to the wedding!"

Hikoro let out an exasperated sigh, managing a smile to San, "You don't mind if I cut in, do you hon? It'll only be a minute, I just can never seem to catch Hitomi at a convenient time."

'Well, now's far from convenient...' San couldn't help but grumble in her thoughts, feeling like she was much too overweighed now with these problems. She also knew that this was delaying Catherine and Yukari from speaking with Hitomi, as they were hopefully thinking of ways to help San escape from Hikoro's prying eyes.

"Actually, I'm speaking to Yukari," she confessed truthfully, deciding that much didn't hurt.

"Really?" Hikoro looked confused as she glanced at the glowing green display of her telephone. "I thought I read Hitomi's number on the call display."

"Oh, she's at Hitomi's house," San fessed up again, feeling she was now making matters worse. Yukari confirmed that.

"Gosh, San, what's happening? She wants to speak to Hitomi?" Yukari's worried voice came loudly across the line. "She can't do that! Hell, we can't even do that! I don't think Hitomi's gonna be one happy camper talking to her mother right now. Trust me, it's not a good idea."

San didn't know how to reply, after all, Hikoro was standing right in front of her and she didn't want to say anything incriminating, much the less tell her aunt that she could not speak with her own daughter. Honestly, how did San just get stuck in such a trivial position? Hadn't she been the one lucky enough to avoid having to confront Hitomi? This felt just as intimidating, if not worse!

"I have no idea what to do," she hushed quickly into the receiver, saying the words for Yukari's sake and hoping they were just beyond earshot of Hikoro. "But...." she raised her head and smiled in her aunt's direction, "would you like to speak with Yukari, Auntie? I guess she wants to say hello."

"WHAT??" Yukari's astonished exclamation came blasting through the receiver, louder than ever could be. No matter however long it had been that the Kanzaki and Uchida family had known each other, Yukari couldn't deny the fact that somewhere rooted within her, she held a great fear towards Hikoro Kanzaki. After all, the woman had put her own daughter, Yukari's best friend, through three years of psychiatric treatment! During those years, Hitomi had never smiled when she saw her mother, other times she would actually be quite normal, but never around Mrs. Kanzaki. It had only been fairly recently when Hitomii's relationship with her mother had started to truly smoothen over, but even then Yukari understood that those void-like doubts still were like massive unfilled gapes. Since Yukari had grown up with Hitomi, she also shared Hitomi's immediate respect to Hikoro Kanzaki, never wishing to challenge the woman's authority. So if this was the case, even when Yukari was a good grown 20-year-old woman, how on earth was she supposed to explain to Hikoro that her only daughter, once labeled crazy by her own mother, was now temporarily "un-engaged" because of an encounter with somebody that she secretly loved from a different planet...

Hell, Yukari was in shit and loads of it. She didn't have one clue what to do, and whether on the phone or not, she felt petrified. Why hadn't San explained it all? She seemed to get so much better along with Hikoro than anybody else, especially not feeble Yukari. San was strong. Catherine was strong. Hitomi was strong, even at moments that should have broken her down completely. Yukari didn't like to be that solitary, she liked to have people around to help her in such situations. She wasn't weak, Yukari could be quite the intolerable force when she wanted to be, but that was only against certain people. Prestige figures like the wise and powerful "mother-of-the-best-friend" were people she did not like to associate with in high-level situations such as these.

"Hi there, Yukari," Hikoro's voice was amiable, so sickeningly amiable that it purely frightened Yukari to imagine when that once friendly voice would eventually transform into nothing short of a demon's growl. All parents are alike when they're angry... they are just plain scary, even when your adult yourself. Yukari's mother was no short of terrifying when furious, on a scale of Hellish beings standing as the minions, whereas Hitomi's mother was practically Lucifer himself. That's no offense meant to Hikoro of course, but she was nothing short of difficult when things don't go her way.

"So how are you so early in the morning Yukari? I haven't' spoken to you in a while either."

"Oh... it's been great," Yukari stammered, realizing just how much of a gigantic lie or phrase of horrible sarcasm that previous statement had been.

Catherine observed in anxiousness, holding onto the mop so tightly she wouldn't be surprised if it lost colour where she grasped. She had been following along on what was happening, but Cathy didn't have too much knowledge on Hitomi's family. She didn't have to have too much knowledge apparently, for just judging by Yukari's often "For-the-love-of-it-woman-SAVE-ME!" looks Cathy knew that it was quite possible that Hitomi's mother was less of an approachable figure than Hitomi was at this time

"That's good to hear," Hikoro continued, already concocting her over-the-phone lecture to Hitomi about being so careless with her own wedding duties in her mind. "I hope you don't mind me cutting in for Hitomi, it'll only be a couple of minutes. I just need to remind my own daughter something... once again."

Yukari swallowed, practically having to fight off choking from that action, almost feeling invisible sweatbeads forming on her skin. She looked to Cathy pleading for a solution, but knowing there was none she could offer and if any, there were none Hikoro Kanzaki would easily comply to. Yukari knew in all certainty there were only two mouse holes out of this situation, teeny escapes leading to large and unknown places where lurking cats may just be waiting to make situations even worse. Nevertheless, Yukari was no safer stammering like she was, so she had to come and bear reality to the decisions she had to make. It was either to tell Hikoro Kanzaki the flat-out truth (Yukari would much rather omit some of the stranger details but knowing Mrs. Kanzaki she would simply drain them out of Yukari one way or another) or she could go the easy yet also difficult way out for herself-- give Hitomi the telephone. She was actually starting to consider that idea... how bad could it get? Actually, no, that was stupid. That would just put Hitomi through even more stress than she was already going through, and Yukari didn't want to dare do such a thing. She realized now that there was a third and larger mousehole awaiting her, one that led to a small and pitiful feeling towards herself, but it was still an escape nonetheless. She could lie to Hikoro. She hadn't done that before, never had reason to really, but now was as good as reason as anything else. Hitomi wasn't in the mood to chit-chat with anybody and the absolute last person Yukari would pair her up with would be Hitomi's skeptical mother, Hitomi's mother and also Amano Nekuchi. Yukari's bridesmaid mission was to keep those two depressive figures as far away from Hitomi as possible.

"Actually, to tell the truth," 'bad choice of words to start off a lie...' she couldn't help but heckle herself with a pang of guilt, but this was the best way out and she knew it. "Hitomi's really tired right now... she's uh... sleeping."

"Sleeping? Still?"

"Yeah..." Yukari felt even more hesitant, glancing momentarily at her analog watch. It was only 9:30 in the morning, and quite frankly, how early did Mrs. Kanzaki expect Hitomi to be awake anyway? In all truth, had this crisis not arisen, Yukari herself would still be happily tucked in bed for the next few passing hours.

"Well, when she wakes up tell her to please call her mother --"

Then, as Hikoro Kanzaki was interrupted mid-sentence, Yukari's face went a ghastly white. Her slender fingers went instantly rigid, near to crushing the plastic of the phone within her hands, then jelly and flimsy having to keep that phone from falling out of her grasp. Paled, stock-still and ruptured with tension, she knew she couldn't deny it. She couldn't deny what she had just heard.

Somebody else had just picked up. Someone else was now on the line.

'Maybe it's San, maybe it's San!!' Yukari instantly started chanting in the words in her head, hopeful yet hopeless, knowing first of all that it couldn't possibly be Catherine for the girl stood right before her. But then again, why was she hoping for something that couldn't be concerning San? Yukari knew that it probably wasn't San. The Kanzaki residence only had one phone that she remembered. There were only two lines in this conversation, and the other end had only one phone hooked up with no chance of someone else 'picking up'. However, this place, this present home of Hitomi's had two phones with three different people. Two of those persons were around one phone. Yukari had that phone, Catherine stood with her. There was only one other person who had the ability to be the third in this anxious conversation, only one person in that one room with that one other phone.

"Hello Mother." Hitomi said.

* * *

"Amano?"

"You know what, if you're trying to hide this from me, you're doing a pretty lousy job."

"Maybe that' s because I don't have anything to hide."

"Oh really, is that so?"

"Um… Mr. Nekuchi?"

"Yeah. Really. And you know something? You can leave me the hell alone now. I'm tired of this stupid conversation. If you don't want to trust me, then that's your problem. Deal with it."

"Trust you? How can I trust you? I asked you for a very simple answer, Hitomi, as simple as it can come and yet you still fail to answer me. It was a yes or no question, but who cares now because I think we both know the answer… I think we're both perfectly aware that you are in total love with this guy. You love him don't you? Sure, of course you do. I know you just-"

"Why don't you just shut your face? You know something Amano? You don't know shit about me! You'll NEVER understand me Amano, do you get that?"

"I'll never understand you?! What in the hell is that supposed to -"

"Yeah. That's right. You're too fucking stubborn to see it or even care. All you are thinking is 'oh, of course it has to be someone else'. You won't even consider that it could be another reason, would you? Of course not! You just don't care for me - at all."

"Really? REALLY? Oh come on, what bullshit, Hitomi. What bullshit. I don't care for you - is that it? You mean my constantly being there for you and providing for you for these last four long as hell years is what you consider 'not caring'?"

"Oh good for you, so you're loaded with cash and brains, I don't really give two shits about that that Amano, because you know what? Where was your care when I really needed you… not your stupid money. Where were you when I wanted to talk to someone about my visions or-"

"Oh, don't bring this crap up right now-"

"No, see? This is exactly what I have to put up with… you and you're stinking skepticism. Is that called caring? Even now you won't even try being open-minded. Where are you Amano when I really need you? You just abandon me, that's all you do, and all you ever do. You don't want to confront what I have to say, you don't even attempt it… you're just too busy on your little dates with Yukari, isn't that right…? Yeah, I thought so."

"Amano Nekuchi?"

He spun around so abruptly, that he nearly collided with a passing janitor cart, only seconds from having spilt the bucket of sloshing cleaning fluid all across the already slippery halls. Flashing the hospital cleaning lady with a sheepish yet apologetic smile as he helped re-balance a group of sagging mops into a manageable bundle, Amano quickly redirected his attention to whom had been calling on him so repetitively with light taps to the shoulder, feeling his cheeks flourish with embarrassment at his lack of attention.

Kaye Joi, only two years his senior, returned his dazed glare with a look of curiousity and interest, holding about a dozen clipboards to her chest and peering at him inquisitively through small-frame lenses. Although a relatively little person, Kaye, to Amano, still held the power of three medical surgeons in his darned opinion. Upon joining the apprenticeship program, Amano, knowing him, would settle for no less than the best of the best of an instructor, and after being assigned Kaye he had been quite disappointed to see on just how young of age she was, and the fact that she herself was nothing more than an assistant nurse. Why, that had been the position he had been interested in applying for! Amano had figured he'd hopefully get a medical nurse or a specialist to be able to help around, but Willendorf General Hospital was constantly booked with eager apprentices from his neighbouring Willendorf Medical University, so to him, it wasn't a surprise to be just teamed up with anyone. However, it wouldn't be long after until his opinions would easily sway concerning Kaye. It became evidently clear to him eventually, that she took her role as his senior to the utmost of importance. He was her only pupil, which made the work twice as hard and even more demanding, not to mention that she had graduated top of her class from Willendorf. In just the first few days of his spring holidays he already had practically all of the hospital halls mapped in memory, and not to mention all of the little homework assignments that Kaye gave to him to research on the medical program she had also instructed him to download. It was incredible - she was such a young and tiny representative of a whole lot of success.

"You look distant." Kaye stated the words easily, studying his eyes so intently as if reading the dialogue of his thoughts. "There's something bothering you, I suppose?"

"Eh…" Amano stammered for a second, realizing just how easily his mind drifted. He couldn't help but find it unfortunate to know that Kaye had caught him dawdling; she knew it wasn't like him to be acting offset, feeling that today he was a thousand times more offset than usual.

"It's really nothing," Amano waved it off confidently with the back of his hand; yet knowing every utterance of that was not of the truth. "I was just… thinking of things."

"I see," Kaye smiled, half supportively, half questionably, yet still without much hesitation, she adjusted her long, white sleeves and handed Amano the heaping pile of clipboards with countless blank data sheets.

"I take it you're still up for work, are you not?"

"Of course, ma'am," Amano nodded his head slightly, brown bangs fraying, receiving the new bundle in his arms, feeling a little weighed with his words. Although his smile was one of eagerness and his eyes shone with ability, truly, Amano just didn't feel up to his usual little chores today… it just wasn't to his best interest. He wasn't typically lazy and far from being anything much of a procrastinator, but little things seemed to wear him down these past few hours. It was almost as if there weren't much ways that he knew of in which he could just have what would be like a normal day. On the outside, friends and companions of his may assume it was a normal day for him, yet Amano knew better than that judgment. Today had been far from a normal day ever since he had awakened from his little to few hours of sleep. That exhaustion had caught up with him, along with the dreadfully heavy emotional baggage that he kept so well under wraps. Amano, though being generally sociable, was the not the type to reveal just about anything to the public, and so his actions and words were still sugar-coated with that usual joust of positive energy and enthusiasm, yet inside, he knew he felt nothing of the case. Bit by bit, the harsh reality and the sour fakeness of his pretend-happy life were beginning to gnaw on his insides, his memories becoming yet more vivid, his worries more intense, and his heart more strangled with confusion and apprehension. He was coming to realize slowly how incredibly fragile his future was now, balancing inexperienced on the high wire of life, suddenly as if coming to terms that if he didn't do something to turn around this rather emotionally tormenting situation, fact had it nothing would and he would be feeling this guilty yet angry way for a long time to come.

"You are to come with me," Kaye didn't give him much time to think however, as she tugged his irresponsive self by the sleeve of the usual nurse-green uniform as she began walking onwards down the hall in front of him, heels smacking loudly as she smiled at passing hospital staff.

"But I already know how to post up the clipboards," Amano couldn't help but argue uselessly in his defense, for some reason wishing so much to be home and doing nothing, or at least alone to his own philosophizing solitude. He was used to being at the hospital for long hours, usually going to his apprentice program (of which he did get paid a small yet fair amount for) after his med classes, and even now during the break he would find himself doing all the doctors' small duties throughout the length of the day. It was great experience, but now Amano did not want to be here. He didn't feel eager, or inspired, or longing to know more. He didn't feel that he wanted to be helpful or insightful. He no longer felt the urge to greet every person with a nod or handshake, and didn't care for any greetings anyway. Amano was sick of being concerned about everyone and everything else, he had enough problems as it was, and none of these could escape his mind. It still wrenched at him, the guilt as if anew, the frustration as if rekindled. He was at a loss on whether he should be still furious, or sad, or envious or confused… for he was but all of these things. The only thing he knew for certain was that everything that he now did was nothing but tiresome and consuming of time not so well spent.

"Yes, I know you do," Kaye turned to him momentarily. "But I thought you asked me to show you how the IBET monitoring systems work. There's only one vacant room right now where I can possibly tinker around with the machines without having to worry about another patient coming in."

"Oh yes, that's right, I'm sorry," Amano hurried the words, scolding himself for being so easily forgetful. Kaye marked the smallest things into her mind, and noticing that Amano was acting distracted at times of duty was one thing he didn't want her thinking of.

"You know you don't have to do so many hours Nekuchi," she paused for a second, so quickly that he had to fight from stumbling against her, as she stared up at him with eyes prying. It was apparent what she was doing, the usual "you-can-turn-back-now-if-you-can't-handle-it" kind of tactic, one that Kaye would often apply in order to break down Amano when he felt weary or anxious to quit. Most of the time it had little to no effect on him, her testing his enthusiasm only making him more apt for the job, but this time was different. For the first occasion in his eager days of dreaming of his medical success, Amano felt like immediately abandoning it all to a soft couch, a pile of junk food regardless of nutrients, a bunch of tacky TV shows or unsolvable crossword puzzles, and a whole lot of depression.

"I'm fine." But no, he couldn't do it; Amano knew he would only be prone to more thinking and heartaches at home. He needed to keep distracted, lest he break down himself into a sopping and confused emotional heap.

"Alright," Kaye still used a testing voice, unsure of Amano's response. "But you've worked here a good deal, Amano, that's great but don't forget that you need your own time too. There's nothing much here for you than the little stuff anyway."

'The little stuff'… she had a point when he though of it, especially since lately he hadn't been doing much activity that couldn't be easily accomplished by any passing commoner. There really wasn't any medical expertise required in what he was doing, but nevertheless he couldn't complain. These kind of working hours, whether totally useless or not, still looked promisingly handsome on the resume. Besides, his professor had promised him a unique opportunity for all of his devoted work to Willendorf, and that was actually getting to spend a day in the forensic department next week. It wasn't so much the fact that he got to ogle over decaying cadavers that fascinated him so, but the fact that he, a mere medical student, would be able to help out for the entire day! It was a rare opportunity indeed, one that he so avidly awaited, and wished he could only tell the whole world about. Amano got worked up over the tiniest things when on duty, tiny things he'd often like to share. But today, no matter what good things would become of him, no matter if his lottery ticket came up a winner, no matter if he scrambled upon a blank cheque on the way home, it still didn't seem to matter. It seemed as if Amano had no one to tell…. no one to tell at all no matter what would come to happen. He just didn't feel comfortable in being 'happy' today when there was no one to share such happiness with.

"I can't believe you're doing this, trying to twist everything around like that."

"I'm not trying to twist around anything."

"Please, yes you are. How could you even throw your best friend into this? Yukari has nothing to do with the problem here."

"Oh bullshit Amano, I know you've had feelings for-"

"Correct, that's right. I have had feelings for her… but that was like four years ago when I had gone out with her, Hitomi, I won't deny that much. But you, what about you? What are you denying?"

"You still have feelings for her, I know it."

"I already told you that I don't. How much more proof do you need? How much proof do you have? Don't accuse me of anything that you do not have the evidence to back up your alibi for."

"Well then, quit accusing me of something you do not have evidence for, Amano."

"I don't have evidence for? I have plenty of evidence Hitomi - plenty. Such as with just now, I asked you a very simplified question, and yet you didn't respond. Somehow, our conversation-"

"'Conversation' my ass, it's an argument now thanks to you."

"Yeah, you know what, I don't care what in the hell it is; you can call it whatever you want. But the point of the matter being is that you managed to not answer my question ever… not even indirectly and if that's not proof enough, I don't know what is."

"You are being such a-"

"I'm going to ask it one more time, Hitomi. Just once more, and this time if in that angered little heart of yours, do you have any… just even a soft enkindling of love towards me, you'll promise you'll answer this. Will you answer me Hitomi? Just this once?"

"That's not fair, Amano. I don't even know what you are going to ask."

"If you loved me, you would answer any of my questions."

"Amano…please don't do this. You know we're in the middle of a fight, it's not fair to throw in the whole 'love' concept into it… it's just inappropriate right now."

"When lovers fight even the harshest words can't overthrow the still love they bear within their hearts. Are you asking me to stop demanding things of you… because there is no love in that still heart of yours?"

"Amano… I… it's not that… it's just that…"

"Hitomi, it's alright if you can't answer, that's not the question I have for you. Hitomi, I'm angry right now, as the same I am saddened, as I know you are. Look, I don't want things to fall apart right now."

"You know I don't either! I wanted us to be happy…"

"We both did, I know that. But I'm asking for the truth Hitomi, I'm not asking for what will make us happy. I know I love you as much as I ever have… but if that love is not returned… then that is beyond my control."

"Amano…"

"I want us to be happy, but pretending to be happy people won't get us anywhere… now, Hitomi, if you even remotely care for me, love me, tell me you'll speak the truth now."

"…I care for you Amano… I will speak the truth. What would you like to know?"

"Thank you. Hitomi, I need to know this, I just need to hear it for myself. Hitomi, please be honest, do you love Van Fanel?"

"…the pulse rate. Fascinating isn't it?"

The young Chinese assistant nurse looked to him with a sideways smile, feeling as if her long educational lecture on the various usages of the newly released IBET hospital monitoring systems had just been to no avail. He had gazed at her hand tapping on the surface of the bulky device, with eyes looking as if he wasn't even in the same dimension, seeming as if her once eager pupil was being eaten away by something much more demanding. She honestly couldn't say that she had ever seen a day when Amano would be so incredibly unfocused; normally, he would be intrigued by something like the IBET machine but today seemed to be off normal for him. She figured the stress levels the kid put on himself had finally managed to catch up with him; with all of the strenuous work Amano put himself through, she had no ounce of surprise that he would become a little dazed. She hadn't been in the apprenticeship program for very long and Amano had only had an internship at the Willendorf for just a couple of weeks, but the rate at which he learned and became more professional amazed even her, and Kaye was much like that herself. She thought she had been one of the most rigid and fast-paced medical students to attend Willendorf, but Amano was a fine exception as well. Already he was very familiar with many of the head doctors and specialists throughout the building, and flocking with some of the more senior nurses during his breaks, gaining more expertise by the minute. To be honest, she was actually more surprised that he was now showing his fatigue from such fine efforts.

"Yeah… it's uh, great."

Amano looked to her suddenly, trying to hide a rush of pink to his cheeks, well aware that he hadn't been paying one second of attention. He had wanted to, but just didn't, and was now ashamed just by the prying way that she stared at him. She knew that he hadn't even been listening, and it embarrassed him highly; he felt so irresponsible and ungrateful to how she had taken him all the time and effort to show him to this empty hospital room to recollect her knowledge on the machines to someone who didn't even have enough courtesy to listen. But it wasn't like he could help himself… his memories were very powerful, and the last one he had just had kept Amano in a state of discomfort. It was so just so vivid, as if the words were escaping his mouth a second time, as if the tightness of the air was strangling him all over again.

"Amano," Kaye brought her hand to her hip, laying her weight on one side as if tapping her other foot in analysis. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Yeah… yeah…I'm fine." Amano waved it off, feeling less enthusiastic or truthful with his words each time, but saying it regardless. He couldn't let her break him down so easily, or else then Kaye would know that Amano was susceptible to such emotional weakness. He had to stay on top of the game. He had to remain alert, though he sure didn't feel that he wanted to at this moment. Still, Amano had to make an effort.

"So how come this room is empty?" He lifted his gaze to his surroundings for the first time, barely even remembering when she had walked him to this room feeling his strong memories had taken out a chunk of his real life as it absorbed all that he noticed. "I thought it was really hard to find any empty rooms in this ward."

"It is; very observant Amano," Kaye complimented him, feeling he needed to hear the words at least once this day. It had been keen of him to notice though, especially since this room being empty was under very special circumstances.

"It's really the strangest story I've known thus far," Kaye sighed, trying not to pay mind to the fact that she really didn't understand it. She just loathed not being able to understand, just like Amano loathed such inabilities.

"A strange story? In this rigid place?" Amano did his best to focus on the topic at hand.

"Yeah, funny isn't it? You'd expect this place to be so orderly… but strange things happen. Amano, you have to promise you won't tell anybody this though," she looked to him with a sense of trust. She knew just how amazingly responsible he already was, there really was no reason to even ask if he would keep such things confidential, but just because he was acting a tad bit off today she couldn't help but find herself a little wary of him as well.

"Of course, sure, as long as you didn't like… kill anyone or anything."

"Right, like a little person like me managed to kill somebody," Kaye laughed, glad to see that Amano still possessed his comedic sense of imagination even in his most depressive of times. "It's more of the eerie and supernatural than anything else."

"Supernatural? Like as in ghosts, or something like that?" Amano didn't like the sound of it. He didn't like supernatural things. He didn't like things or aspects that were not so tangible and easily known. It wasn't so much religious ideas that he was wary of, but more so things like visions or extra terrestrials or far out ideas such as those… things that he just had to deal with fairly recently.

"Well, I don't really know how to explain, much the less classify, it really…" Kaye wandered off in thought, gazing at the empty bed controlling shudders from coming upon her. "I don't get it. It was just like one second the patient was there, and the next, he wasn't."

Amano raised an eyebrow; skepticism had the best of him, "What do you mean? He purposely left the hospital without anyone noticing?"

"I'd love to think that, I would," she answered Amano unsurely. "But the thing is, we checked the ward security and entrance surveillance - there was no record of him ever leaving or at least physically checking out of the hospital, plus nobody even saw him leave. What was strangest was the fact that his room blinds were shut when they didn't have to be, and when we finally did get in the room… the far window was wide open."

"Window?" Amano's head turned instantly in the direction of the room's single window, buried in the furthest wall from him, now shut and hidden away by another set of blinds. However, he didn't have to be able to see outside to know that he was eleven stories above ground level. If Kaye was getting at what he was assuming she was getting at, he just couldn't understand how such a thing could be plausible.

"You're not seriously suggesting that he would have…"

"Well, no, not really. You know you and I are much alike - we're not the superstitious people imagining injured folk just climbing out of windows and balance off ledges eleven stories above ground. I'm just saying that no one can explain his sudden exit of the hospital, however it may have been, or why the window would have been left so wide open as it was."

"Do you think he would have managed to leave the hospital on his own? If his injuries were really serious, chances are this could have been an inside job and somebody assisted him to go unnoticed."

"I thought of that, but he looked fine enough to get about… not quickly and probably on a limp - we were going to suggest that he use crutches for a while to ease off the pressure on his wounded leg - but that still doesn't explain how he got out unseen by anyone, because he would have been seen by the elevator cameras because there's no way in hell that kid got down the stairwells."

"That's uh… a puzzler alright. But who did you say this man was again? Maybe he just couldn't afford the medical bills and found some desperate way to escape from here."

"That's an even more confusing story," Kaye let out a sigh. "I just don't understand it. See, this man, he wasn't any regular patient - you're right, he probably couldn't afford the medical bills because I highly doubt he's all that he seems to be, but it doesn't matter, the authorities had the costs covered anyway."

"Authorities?" Amano was amazed; he was actually beginning to develop some intrigue on this odd case, at least just enough to keep his memories from flooding his mind again.

"Yes, officials, a detective really. She had come shortly after he arrived, saying he was a main… I don't know… suspect maybe in some incident that happened by the hotel. Did you hear about it on the news? Weird stuff."

"I didn't catch it I don't think," Amano didn't want to think of the news, for he knew that the news was at eleven at night and he would usually watch it on a daily basis to keep updated on the Aimsa affairs, except that last night he had still been driving home at eleven, much too miserable to care about the other miseries of his local world. But now, he really didn't like the thought of thinking about any accidents yesterday, for one surely came to mind, bounding him with ugly discomfort.

"I managed to. They said something about how there was a near-to accident at the Ramada-"

"Ramada Hotel?" Amano interrupted her mid-sentence. He just had to. There was no way he would get around that concept without making sure of it. He didn't like the sound of that… he didn't like the sound of that at all, the hotel name most especially. For one thing, it was much too familiar. There weren't near-to accidents or accidents at the Ramada to be heard of everyday, but how ironic was it that in just a day and a half he had already managed to hear of two separate stories stressing the same facts; now he was starting to realize that maybe they weren't really two separate stories after all.

"Yep, that's the only one in Aimsa," Kaye stated matter-of-factly, surprised Amano wouldn't know that, or at least wouldn't pay attention to that information. "Something happened with a truck that almost hit a woman and this man saved her, the one that came here, I don't know how or why but somehow the guy got injured in the near-to collision -he a had a severe laceration on his left leg, and according to the detective it was actually from the truck's exhaust pipe."

"Exhaust pipe? As in the one by the truck roof?" He didn't like the sound of this; he really didn't like it at all. It was sounding just too familiar… too likely to be already known to him much to his dismay. It just couldn't be that ironic, could it? Could fate really have sickly tied this in so well? If so, how horribly planned, how horribly synchronized everything was, even when he least wanted it to be. Willendorf was Amano's only form of seclusion… his only refuge and distraction from abounding problems…. He just couldn't cope if this place were to be infested with his anguish also.

"I know it sounds weird," Kaye shook her head, not bothering to try and play with the details a second time - she already found confusing as it was. "But that's how the story goes. As for the guy, he's even stranger. That detective woman even had me run a check on him."

"Run a check? You can do that here?"

"Oh yes, background profiles and all essential information should always be open to us. So anyway, I searched for the guy… an uncommon name… one 'Van Fanel…"

Amano swallowed thickly.

"… and the results were all over the place! None of them matched this guy's description mind you… it was so weird. I figured he was using a fake name or something of the sort…"

Amano could feel the heat build. His eye began to twitch.

"… But anyway, he was dead asleep when I saw him last, then I turned my back, and then Mr. Mysterious was gone. Strange isn't it?"

"Dead asleep…? He should have just been dead."

"Sorry Amano? I didn't catch what you just said. Speak up, hon."

Amano twitched again. His fist began to clench. He stared at the neighbouring hospital bed with enormous distaste, his imagination running freely with its wrath. He could imagine it now… that monstrous man… sleeping there playing innocent like a miserable little baby, dreaming of things that did not belong to him. This was Amano's turf, this was his place of work and play, this was Amano's little sanctuary and damn that man for interfering! This was the very last resort Amano had managed to keep for himself, to hide away from the pestering insistence of that imaginary mongrel, but lo and behold that thief had snuck into his life and stolen all of Amano's valuables. That hideous person had just unknowingly come and screwed everything over; this was Amano's life! His life! That man had no right to just jar in wherever, and more than anything else Amano was furious about, that man had no right to just come in and figure Hitomi was all free for the taking. Amano loved Hitomi and she loved him in return and that's the way it was and should be and should have been for all of eternity! Amano was the one to comfort Hitomi when she cried, or be with her in her happy times. Amano was the one who had her sing-song laughter embedded in memory, her smiling eyes always in thought, and her name tattooed in his heart. Was that not important? Wasn't the gift of time precious to any of them? He didn't have the stinking right to push Amano aside however he pleased, for whatever reason or whatever purpose he knew Hitomi; it didn't deny the strong and solid fact that Amano and Hitomi did share something special. It was undeniable. Four years for the both of them and eight years overall was an incredibly long time growing up in a teenage love, who did he think he was to barge in and take away all that? And now after being close to destroying Amano's loving potential with Hitomi, now this overconfident man had enough nerve to prance around on Amano's territory? That guy was asking for trouble, and giving Amano enough doses of it at the same time.

Suddenly, Amano's heart began to hurt - painfully.

"Seriously, kid, I'm starting to think of sending you home," Kay began to voice her concern, clicking her tongue in disappointment to see Amano was vague again, but worse off than before. Before it had seemed only as if her student were caught in a daydream, a small mental wandering, but now his eyes were glowing and reflecting a much stronger passion. It was a side she had never seen, a persona that was not work-oriented in any way, not influenced by rational decisions or strategic measures, but based solely on the unpredictability of emotion. It was now igniting a flame within Amano that was spiteful yet sad at the same time.

Amano felt dizzy. It reminded him intensely of last night - he was overwhelmed. Anger raged through his testosterone blood, yet a calling began to ache at him - his heart began to throb. Things began to sift through his brain, pounding and calling and arguing for his attention. He so felt like hurting someone, hurting whoever it was that was responsible for his pain… but at the same time he thought of soft things… his last four-year anniversary with Hitomi at Sunset Beach… the way everything had been once so perfect brought about countless sense of feelings unexplainable to the rampaging heart. He didn't know how to feel or react or more so he was doing a terrible job of hiding such confusion.

His finger felt bare.

Kaye studied him worried sick at his failure to respond, watching his eyes glower as if they saw something or as if he felt something that he couldn't enjoy and couldn't share. It was such an inwardly suffering, that Kaye could finally understand why he had come here at such demanding times in the first place - Amano wanted to escape. He had come here to seek refuge but for some reason what she had just mentioned earlier had brought about to him a worse sense of emotional confinement. It looked as if an entire transformation, it was as if Amano was not even remotely the same person he once had been. His eyes reflected the fact that he did not live and thrive along his work as he had done day after day before, but now his only concern was much more personal, much more intimate than it had ever been. With all that Amano had going for him, Kaye knew from a conversation with him from when she met him, that there was only one highly intimate subject that Amano had to be concerned about.

Her eyes fell to his right hand.

There lay four fingers followed by an opposing thumb, each bare and naked as well as his left hand's were also. They acted like an evident symbol of loneliness, unfamiliar to both Kaye and Amano. She studied those hands and stared at those eyes, feeling the pieces as if coming together, yet she could only wonder about what was missing. It was missing… so where was it? Just what had happened? What had occurred to her brightest student to fall into a bottomless well of depression? She desired to ask him so, to inquire about such unpredicted tragedies in his life, yet she felt there was no need for his question. The reasoning behind his sudden melancholic ways was already painted obvious by the tale told by his soul through his eyes.

"Answer me, Hitomi, you said you would."

"I… can't."

"I'm not going to go around in circles here, Hitomi please. Bear with me. You promised you would answer my question… for crying out loud, it's just yes or no!"

"Ama-"

"YES or NO Hitomi, that's all I'm asking for."

"I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? Is that an answer? I'm afraid not. Just fricking answer the question already."

"Amano, let go of me."

"You won't answer my question."

"Let go - now."

"Answer me - now."

"I'm not going to."

"NOT GOING TO?!? NO!?!?Is that the way it's going to be?"

"Amano-"

"Don't talk to me Hitomi! You're inability to answer has proven something to me, it's proven just how much you love this Van-"

"Amano, I-"

"If you want it this way, then fine. Here, take this."

"What? What's this? Your engagement ring?

"Yes it is, how very observant of you. You know what Hitomi, you can keep it."

"What? Why? Amano, can't we talk this out?"

"You obviously don't have what it takes to talk. I can't marry someone who can't

even-"

"Oh my God, Amano, don't tell me you're doing this to me!"

"Well, I am because you're doing what you're doing against me. So you know what? Until you feel that you actually 'want' this relationship of ours, you keep that ring until you have enough honesty to give it back to me."

"Oh my God, Amano… please don't do this…"

"Stop your crying. I gave all the chances you needed Hitomi."

"I'm sorry, I just don't know what's wrong with me!"

"And neither do I, so until you figure it out, the wedding is in your own hands… Goodbye, Hitomi."

"Amano, no… please no…!"

"Hitomi…goodbye."

* * *

Laugh and cry, live and die…
Life is a dream we are dreaming…

Pictures were not worth a thousand words. They were worth millions. She could sense that with each small and memorable photo that her eyes scanned over, frozen in the time of their taking, a time obviously worth recollecting in the image's eternal illustration of emotion and beauty. Some were not as well off as others however, for they were tattered near the edges or embedded with fading colours, due to the fact that Angela had never found the time to organize the hundreds of photos into any sort of classified albums, particularly because she knew it would take quite a few days that she didn't have to get all of such a mess arranged. But regardless of when or where they were taken or any such specific details, she had kept them all because each had meant something to her… each telling their own momentary story. Because the many pictures were simply gathered together in an empty cookie tin bin, the busy now single mother didn't have all of the time to take a stroll down memory lane whenever she pleased, and to be honest at this point she should have been doing just about anything else.

Actually, Angela had just finished packing a second of Shied's suitcases. It had taken her a full hour, and that whole time, Angela's mind drew nothing but a blank. It was as if she folded clothing and wedged in notebooks without a trace of a thought, as if in her sleep, in complete avoidance from having to think of anything. It was true though; in order for her to keep herself together in a somewhat stable state, Angela just had to literally stop thinking. Otherwise, if she began to think, she'd begin to notice. If she began to notice, she'd begin to see. If she began to see, she'd realize how empty Shied's small room was becoming, how the scattered papers which were there for seemingly years were now hidden within one of the various boxes, where the piles of neat clothing now lay concealed as luggage, how the baseball cards were lost within packed knapsacks, and how posters and drawings were taken off the bedroom walls, leaving nothing but the imprint of their light shadows for her to remember them by. And if Angela began to see all this, then she'd begin to feel. And if she'd begin to feel, there would be nothing but a lonely pain to overwhelm.

And that was what brought Angela to the pictures. They had remained within their living room tucked underneath a coffee table, pretty much untouched unless there were new photos to add to the collection. But still, to her, even though they had been there every day since, it only intrigued her to look at them today. That was only because she could not look at Shied's room, and now that she was done ensuring that all of his belongings were safe within his luggage, she could not look at those suitcases. There was an awful truth to them, a miserable aura that came to her when she thought of it, and so she didn't. Angela escaped to those pictures, those photos, to run away from the choking impressions she received from blank walls and curtain-less windows. She couldn't take it in there. She just couldn't. Or else her eyes would water, and her hands were shake, and she would wail in all of her self-pity. But Angela was a strong woman. She didn't do such feeble things, at least not anymore. She would fight this pain, even if it meant denying it, for as long as her weak little heart could bear. The blank room…. It was all as if a dream. She still heard his young laughter within it, and the soft beats of his music from his small portable stereo. She could still see the scattered clothing, hangers, dangling off doorknobs, curtains drawn for Casey's enjoyment, as a small breeze would blow in. She could still see these things. She could see them through the blur of the tears.

Day by day I find my way…
Look for the soul and the meaning...

The first picture - aged and forgotten, taken right at the turn of the 90s. She had been only 22, with her waist-long sandy blonde hair and a pale smile, gazing at the camera with uncertainty. It had been a painful uncertainty at the time, captured by the eerie lighting within the photograph, the way Angela's eyes had glazed over at the moment with thoughts and panic riding her life. It was back then when she had first started to piece her existence together. She had moved to Aimsa by the time she turned 19, with not much hope for any sort of a future, until the Birthright community of Japan had taken her in after discovering her very recent struggles with parental loss, high school dropouts, and abortion. At the age of twenty, Angela had become highly active with her Catholic church, and had decided that the young woman would now spend her life trying to compensate her mistakes. Managing to find her own apartment and to hold a steady job at Liquidation World, she had also taken on the role of countless volunteer hours at the Aimsa Children's Hospital, working with sick or injured children to a near to daily basis, as if taking them in as her own. Angela had felt as if it were the only thing she could possibly do to make up for abandoning her own child - by seeing that child's valuable spirit within every young girl and boy she encountered who needed her support and attention, by giving the only thing she could - love.

Then you look at me…
And I always see…
What I have been searching for…

Then the series of children pictures began to follow, photos taken only a year ago, during the Aimsa Children's Hospital fundraiser week. It had been a time when dozens of volunteers would come in, sometimes expert chess players or pet owners or cookie bakers to the helpful ordinary, bringing anything they thought would paste a smile on a child's face as a televised telethon brought camera crews in and out. She gazed at each picture intently, the newer photographs, more accurate and more detailed. They were abundant - dozens of snapshots of smiling children, some with casts, some with crutches, some with scars, yet nonetheless they smiled brightly each grasping onto a stuffed animal that Angela had given them. Their smiles were honest and true, and all that Angela had so lived to seeing. It was a feeling of gratefulness for them and also for her, a feeling of completion, where she could for once look at her life to have aided rather than to have destroyed. It made every sacrifice worth the efforts.

Then the photographs stopped moving. Her hands came to a pause in their shuffling, after having passed by smile after smile, one came to her immediate attention. Fighting to keep her frail hands from trembling, her breath could only fall short as she gazed at the crystal eyes watching her from the within the priceless photograph.

I'm lost as can be…
Then you look at me…
And I am not lost anymore.

Irises of sapphire blue, bangs of a wispy blonde, figure of a young boy with an expression of total innocence, curiousity and intrigue written upon his face. That was exactly what stared back at Angela, a picture handled and looked at many times before, but each time it was as if the picture were anew, as if she had never seen it prior to that moment when she'd hold it in her hand once again. It was a Polaroid, and somewhat dim, reminding Angela that she been meaning to get this picture enhanced when she could. Of all the images that had ever befallen her eyes throughout the course of her life, that picture, that one lone dim and blurred picture was the best of them all. It was everything to her, because it showed everything that was everything to her, in its most simple of ways. In a dim hospital room, a bit more than a year ago, it had been that very day when she had first met that young boy. In this photo, he cradled within his arms a gray, stuffed cat, plastic whiskers slightly frayed and eyes having lost their once brand-new luster, but yet he had liked it so much when she had shown it to him, that she had immediately allowed it to keep it. He had explained, in his inquisitive and polite yet timid voice, that they had no such thing where he was from. He had told her many things then about where he was from, and about how much it was different from where he was now. Although what he said seemed strange to her, she never questioned it, for in her eyes he was a child, and she knew he was a child of truth. It had been then, sitting there on his bedside, telling him about the hospital and how she helped out children, and listening to him tell her about many thing of his life, and about how she was so beautiful in the way that she looked just like his mother did. It had been a small inkling to her to ask about this child, to ask what everyone wondered about him, such as where he was from, where were his parents, and how he planned to return home. But he was a mystery child, and Angela had known that she could not just walk out of that door leaving him be as a mystery, an unsolved puzzle. For just sitting by him, talking with him, Angela was placing those pieces together. She saw the purity, the humanity behind this boy, and it reached out to her. It called to her like a child called to a mother, like melancholy called to comfort. It consumed everything else she thought about, but most of all, it gave Angela a meaning. This was a lost child, as she was a lost woman. It had been then that she had decided that, no matter the burdens or the hurdles to be leapt over, together, they would not be lost anymore.

People run, sun to sun…
Caught in their lives ever flowing…

Everything had been a hassle from day one. Angela was not normally the stronghold of anything; she didn't go about taking responsibility of things she didn't have to. Perhaps that was why she had dropped out of high school, or allowed her trash boyfriend to take advantage of her, or had neglected the responsibility of the child that she was to bear, or ran off to another country to escape everything that had gone wrong, but it had been that same day when all of those qualities filled with a dreaded fear to commitment or being deserted was set aside. It was a waking call to Angela, one that forced her to take a stand, to voice her own opinion, and to fight her own battle. She wouldn't get that boy, that blessed gift to her, without a struggle. But in her mind, for the first time focused in determination, she knew that this was something she wouldn't back down on. She knew the odds and the circumstances, and she knew she had what it took to beat it all. It was Angela's debt to society, to life, to herself, and to this lost child. And that was the way of mind Angela lived with since then; a lifestyle of designating priorities, of budgeting, of planning, of teaching and learning. She grew from a lost young lady to a woman in a matter of a day. Things kind of evolved from there, and the relationship, as expected, grew stronger. Though her apartment was not large, though her professions were not extraordinary, somehow, they got by. That young boy was no longer a stranger to her, nor was he a mystery. He was Shied to her, Shied Schezar. It was the only the two of them most of the time, as they went on their own little outings together, such as adopting Casey, visiting museums to Shied's interest, trekking through landmarks, and even little things like when they'd work together with Shied's projects or assignments. But it wasn't like he needed much help anyway, the boy was very clever, and he grew to like school rather easily. Shied had said that he preferred not to get particularly close to any of his classmates so that he wouldn't have to keep lying about his past to them, but Angela knew that the friendly boy had many friends there too. They liked Shied, because he took an interest in everything. If someone liked soccer, Shied would love to hear all about it, for he knew nothing of the game. If someone else liked a particular television show, he would get involved in the conversation as well, for Shied was new to everything. He held no judgments, like a tiny babe born to the world of the Mystic Moon. Frankly, Angela was quite convinced that Shied was beginning to take an interest in the young ladies as well, for he was already eleven, and besides that, Shied wasn't used to be able to associate with just any girl he pleased. On Gaea, he was obliged only to marry those with royal blood, and to associate only with females, in an affectionate manner, of particular high class. The freedom of the Mystic Moon and also its very realistic hardships intrigued the boy. He was the cleverest little thing she had ever seen.

Once begun, life goes till it's gone…
We have to go where it's going…

How did fourteen months pass so quickly? The snapping of her fingers would have seemed longer, in comparison to this blissful yet awfully short time. Who was she kidding herself, trying to deny what was to happen today? Why did she avoid it so desperately? Why was she running again? Why was she trying to escape, like she had when she was younger? Angela Ferentini was a strong woman now, was she not? She had even told him, young Shied, to pretend today as if it were any other. She had done so, and he had done so, for so long, but it was foolish! This day was not like any other! Shied's walls were bare, his belongings were packed… he was leaving.

She placed the photo down abruptly, ignoring the water build up within her eye ducts, trying not to think of it, escaping once again. Instead, she decided to think of something else but something relatively close - the thought of whom Shied would be leaving to. She had never mused over it much, because she didn't think it was a topic that needed much thinking. From what she knew of Shied's many stories about his parents on Gaea, she found them entirely credible people… but now, she decided to think about that a bit more. She didn't want to contemplate on the fact that her baby would be leaving her, and it hadn't hit home just yet. But she thought in advance to where'd he'd be going, to whom would take her place once he was gone. She couldn't say that she quite outclassed Shied's parents on that other planet, for his father was a prestige knight, and his foster mother was a princess for crying out loud, the direct sister of Shied's biological mother. It went without saying that Shied, being a young prince himself about to be crowned as Duke of an entire nation, was well off where he came from. She didn't have to worry about him not getting the proper education, or clothing or food. They could do a thousand times better at raising Shied financially than she could ever accomplish in a lifetime. But it wasn't that which Angela was concerned about. There was only thing that really came to bother her - did they love Shied as much as she did? Neither of them were Shied's first parents, and in a sense, nobody was Shied's "first parent". His real mother Marlene Aston had died when he was at such an early age, and he had been given to the Duke of Frade to be raised since his birth was an illegitimate one, and he could not be raised by Allen for that would most definitely scar his reputation. It was only until Allen Schezar be wedded Milerna Aston, did they ever even tell Shied about the fact that Allen was actually his biological father. Only then did they decide to take him into their custody, welcoming the young prince into an even more royal family, bounded by royal ties. No matter what way Angela looked at it, from each and every direction, the way things had came to be just didn't look loving at all. It almost seemed as if Shied were bounced around, juggled from family to family, as if at first he would be nothing but a political burden, but only until after the boy established a respectable standing in society, did they come to accept him again. It was as if his entering the Aston and Schezar relationship on the whim were like for political aid, as if Shied could always serve as a peace agreement between the nations of Frade and Asturia, which normally never had gotten along. What was Shied to them then? Just a pile of human contract? It was insulting to Angela, and though she knew that chances were that was very wrong on her theory about them not loving Shied, Angela still knew but one thing for certain: She'd always love him more.

And you say you see…
When you look at me…
The reason you love life so…
Though lost I have been…
I find love again…
And life just keeps on running…

"Mum?"

Her breath left her a second time, the water welling in her eyes returned. A thousand emotions surged through her at once, at a force she couldn't react to. Angela knew then that he had been watching her, observing her in his usual astounded silence. She knew then that as she had stared at him, he had been staring at her in return.

"Mum…" his voice was gentle; his raincoat zipped up halfway, sneakers lazily tied on, of which she would lecture him upon, baseball cap placed upon his head. He wore a smile, a forced smile. He was still pretending as if everything were just fine.

"I… I think it's time to go."

She watched him blankly, as if his words didn't register, as if his false positive attitude was one she couldn't believe. She could see right through her son in every way. He ached in the same way as she.

"Shied honey, stop pretending," She rushed the words, trying not to choke upon them, turning to face him as she struggled to see through the blur.

"What do you mean?" He cocked his head sideways, intuitive, trying so earnestly to hide such emotion, trying to make this day less painful than they all knew it reallly was.

She felt herself cringe. She hated sadness. She wanted to escape - but couldn't any longer.

"Honey baby, come here."

Shied did as he was told, wondering yet obedient, not questioning for he knew it was not a time for questions.

Angela's arms embraced Shied quickly, holding him close as any mother would, running her slim fingers through his hair, fine like silk, feeling his skin as smooth as an infant's, his warmth as soothing as with a loved one.

"I took a life a long time ago," she said it in a whisper, in shame of what she had done. "He was a very young boy, Shied. He was so very young," her tears began to fall, dripping downwards, slow and chilling, "And he was innocent just like you Shied. He would have been just a few years older than you now if I hadn't stolen that life away. But in every way, Shied, you are that life. You are my son, Shied, to me you are. But I can't deny it anymore… I can't deny that you're leaving me today."

The embrace grew tighter, tears falling more abundantly.

"But you're not denying anything," he began to argue, voice quivering yet strong. "You can't deny it because I am your son, Mum, I was meant to be your son and I always will be! I'll never leave you!! I am your son!"

His voice was strong, their embrace was soft, his words were touching, and her heart was touched. There was no reply, for there was no use for one. There was only but the sweet silence. Nothing more than a simple sweet silence abounding in love as they gazed at each other through the soft tears in their eyes, nothing more than a mother and her son.

* * *

Chapter 15: Into the Night Sky

The sleek gold wasn't even close to faded, still that gorgeous burnt yellow surrounding the continuous loop. There were no gems encrusted, but that didn't take away from its truly inspiring image seeing as, after all, it was a male's ring and such pretty things as diamonds or sapphires weren't entirely necessary if not strange altogether. Because of that, the handsome piece of jewellery was much too large to fit on any one of Catherine's fingers, and it wasn't like she would have been disrespectful enough to wear it anyway. She didn't even feel that it was morally right to even touch it, and if not for the fact that the kitchen counter needed a bad cleaning, she would have simply left it in its place. The ring, all alone in its miniature simplicity, was a very powerful symbol of a path she could not tread. Plainly saying, it wasn't her business and Catherine hadn't been around long enough to demand it to become her business, as much as she wanted it to be.

Suddenly, the sound of the opening bedroom door alerted her panic, forcing Catherine Corain to quickly yet gently drop the ring onto the surface of the dining room table, trying to claim for her innocence as if she hadn't been doing anything. To be honest, she really hadn't been doing anything but transferring the item to a safer place, but even then she didn't want to explain all that to her traumatized roommate. It was an uncomplicated thought that still purely frightened Catherine - the thought of facing Hitomi Kanzaki.

But to Catherine's mortified relief, Hitomi was actually not the one to walk through the bedroom door at all. Instead, it was Yukari Uchida filled with a look of disdain disappointment, dark rings encircling her eyes to prove just how tired she was. Cathy didn't blame her to the least bit, feeling she had to constantly stifle off a yawn every other minute in this strenuous early time of morning. Already complete with slick, yellow gloves and frilly apron made from her mother, Cathy had about a three-hour head start on her annual Saturday weekend cleanings. It really wasn't that early, only about eight or so fresh in the morning, but to a pair of university seniors edging onto finals, sleeping in on a Saturday was an absolute must, if not a requirement for one's health and sanity. But Catherine couldn't help but notice how easily distracted she was getting from her dusting and mopping (keeping in mind that Cathy at her work was rather difficult to distract) as her eyes had kept peeled to that bedroom door. Now, as agonizing minutes later, Cathy couldn't help but share Yukari's miserable disappointment. This morning was truly going nowhere.

Yukari looked aimlessly at Cathy, the tray with the hot bowl of oatmeal and fresh glass of orange juice still sitting untouched where it was within her arms. She gave Catherine a hopeless dimmed glance complete with an exhausted sigh.

"She's not hungry."

"Poor girl," Catherine matched that sigh and retrieved the tray from Yukari, placing it gently against the dining table, covering the uneaten food with a plastic lid, while shooing the curious white Naria away. She managed to catch a glimpse of the ring once again, thinking to herself just how long Yukari had been inside that room with Hitomi. It probably hadn't been more than five minutes.

"Did you get to tell her about how those two kids came by yesterday?"

Yukari nodded her head slightly, pulling back a dining chair and collapsing her weight into it. She couldn't get Hitomi's distraught image out of her mind, and all of these happenings combined made her feel really and truly helpless. Yukari just didn't know what to do. There were so many things to do, but she couldn't find the heart or nerve in her to confront Hitomi on any of these things.

"It was that bad, huh?" Catherine plodded into her thoughts, removing her waxy yellow gloves and sitting herself adjacent to Yukari. Yukari looked purely exhausted, head in hands with fingers seaming through her layered hair every once and a while. The thing was, Catherine knew that all of that exhaustion was not from physical activity at all, but the tense emotional activity of everything that was occurring and had occurred.

"Yeah," Yukari lifted her chin to stare at Catherine with a grimacing look. "Man, Cath, what are we to do? She's not gonna get out a bed, hell, the girl won't even eat and I ain't gonna barge right in there and force her to either."

Catherine nodded sadly; disappointed to know Hitomi was as much of a mess as she had feared. It was such a complicated problem that even in this past hour, neither Catherine nor Yukari could devise a full-proof way to successfully confront it. There were so many questions that they just shouldn't ask, and there were so many problems that they just couldn't solve. Yet, if these two -- the few that weren't plagued by emotional distress -- could not resolve this climatic situation, then honestly, who could? Just what could they do to fix something that was not their business, yet all the same a major factor in their lives and daily activities? Thus, the girls would have to remain indecisive for just a little longer.

"I'm sorry Catherine," Yukari sighed miserably, glancing every so often in Hitomi's bedroom door's direction, hoping for a sign of life to erupt from it. "I really suck at this kind of stuff. I didn't even get the guts to work up enough courage to ask her about last night. I couldn't do it. You have to see her, Cathy, it's unbelievable."

Cathy let out a breath. She had caught a momentary glimpse of Hitomi just last night, and if that's how upset the girl was then, then she just didn't want to know how Hitomi looked now.

"Maybe you should try," Yukari looked to Catherine with hopeful eyes. "I just don't know what to say. Well, I do know what to say, but I just can't say it, you know?"

"I know what you mean," Catherine agreed, fingering the ring once again as she saw it still lying by her hands. "But I don't know how much help I can be. I don't want to really say anything, because I haven't known her too long."

"Don't worry about that," Yukari forced a smile past her dismay. "Hitomi gets along with you just fine, better than so much other people actually. I don't think she'll get upset at either of us, but you're right, she's still in a very unapproachable state right now."

"Just what did she say to you?"

"Oh…" Yukari bit her lip wishing she didn't have to recall Hitomi's broken image. Moreover, she didn't like recalling Hitomi's broken voice trying to hide the wailing tears she had been shedding hour after hour. Even as concealed as the young woman was in that room, her vibes of utter sadness were still plainly easy to detect.

"She didn't say much at all. Hitomi was tucked up to her chin in covers and facing the wall, so I couldn't see her either. I just asked if she was all right, she said yes, and then I told her about the boy and that girl that visited yesterday. She didn't respond so I just said you had breakfast made. She mumbled something or other that she wasn't hungry and I could only stand to tell her we'd be there for her if she needs us, before getting out of that room."

Yukari smiled a bit, a smile that was not a sign of gladness, but a symbol of musing on just how desolately impossible this situation was, "You won't believe how depressive it is in there, Cathy. I can't go in there again. I just had to get out."

"Don't blame yourself, I know it's a lot to absorb," Cathy tried to share a supportive smile; appreciative that at least Yukari had had enough courage to try and approach their unstable friend. Although Catherine was usually labeled as the brave one in tense situations, emotional situations were another story she did not like to read. She could barely even sleep last night, the hours easily slipping her by as she lay just constantly worrying for the sake of her new companions. The tone of Amano and Hitomi's last heated words to each other rang disturbingly through her mind and thoughts and memories. Catherine had been the only one who witnessed it, seeing as Yukari and San had already been dropped off home to the appropriate places, and of course she had been returning after parking Amano's vehicle back in the guest lot. It had been then that she approached the door of 5B, hearing unsettling and thrashing words from within her own home, knowing things had not gone well at all in her absence. She couldn't explain the reasoning or the cause, but all Cathy knew was the second she got that door open, Amano had taken his car keys off her and disappeared instantly, leaving Hitomi in the most weeping, pitiful state she has ever been in. It was an unimaginable situation, pure discomfort and lack of knowledge on just about everything. Hitomi's distraught image was just so damn torn, that even the usual empathetic Catherine could not handle sharing such emotions. Thus, the two had gone to bed without many words, leaving the night and the following day to be as troubling as ever can be.

"Hah, what are we gonna do now..." Yukari shook her head, wondering still when she would awake from this nightmare. She was thankful however that she wasn't as worse off as Catherine. Yukari was often miserable at the fact that her parents had purchased her that condominium apartment way out near Tsutomu Lake, since her and Hitomi had been planning to be roommates since they were little high school fledglings, and Hitomi just couldn't afford splitting the cost of the condo. However, in the case of last night, Yukari being independently stuck in her own home was a fortunate case, seeing as she could only sympathize for Cathy who had to struggle with this dilemma straight through the night hours. Yukari had only been informed of the problem early this morning, when Cathy's urgent phone call had awakened her and after hearing of the situation, she had climbed aboard the first train headed to Greenwood station. Even though Yukari had known both Amano and Hitomi for what seemed like forever to her, something of this unpredicted and climatic measure would be much too much for her to bear. This had never happened before between any of them, ever! Sure, there were squirmishes such as the one between her and Hitomi a few years back, but each of those things were usually based on immature feelings fueled by anger with a lifespan no longer than that of a fruit fly. This, however, was so much different of a case. If left untreated, a problem such as this would not only take a large toll on everybody involved, but also it would probably be something that could and eventually would scar all three of them for life. Every year it was always the same, Christmas reunions and birthday parties, these three - all together, all the time. Of course as the years went on situations changed and they matured and relationships matured with new ones added, such as with Cathy and San, and this was the routine of life. At least, it's what she knew of life. Yukari wasn't naive; she knew that there would eventually be problems between each of them, especially Amano and Hitomi with all of their upcoming commitments. But this wasn't a problem. This was a full-fleshed out situation. This was an issue, focusing not only how it was to be resolved, but also how it would stay resolved. Truly, her words make entire sense... what were they to do now?

"So have you talked to Amano yet?" Catherine desperately tried to clear the silence. It was creepy and unusual, and she only wished it were but another morning where she could play her favorite Selena tracks at full blast to her and Hitomi's enjoyment, while they would feast on an entrée of different cereals from just about everywhere. Those were the norms of practically every weekend morning in the last month or so, having Cathy dusting something or baking something, Hitomi trying her luck out with Spanish song lyrics and ending up playing "Dreaming of You" instead to cheat off with the English dialogue, and Naria probably just eating her kibbles and shedding more white fur to Catherine's distaste. That had been so normal, so predicted, so taken for granted. How she would give up anything to go back there a second time. She was just thankful that her and Yukari were on their spring holidays, for if school were to be involved it would be exceedingly difficult to try and solve this problem from a distance.

"Hell no," Yukari scoffed to Cathy's inquiry, miffed at the very thought of Amano Nekuchi at such a time. "This is probably all of his fault for all ya know. The guy can be such a jack-ass, I swear."

"You really think he started this?" Catherine asked questionably, remembering Amano's angered image whisk by her last night. An image as upset as that one would need a cause to be angry, he would need a reason to be as mad as he was and Hitomi was the only one who could possibly be the answer to that pondering.

"Well..." Yukari's voice trailed, feeling her breath draw in memory and thought. "It's probably my fault too."

"Your fault?" Cathy looked to her curiously, swallowing silently. Why did she just get such an awful feeling upon hearing that?

"Yeah," Yukari nodded as if in disappointment of herself. "Yukari the idiot huh?"

"Hey, don't say that," Cathy assured sympathetically. "None of this is your fault, Yukari! Why do you think you're involved?"

"Because," she muttered lamely in reply, beginning to easily convince herself that it was her fault. "Don't you remember when I called Amano yesterday? Right after those two strange kids left?"

"Right..."

"Well, I told him, not about those two kids, but about Hitomi.. leaving us that is. I told him about how she woke up yesterday morning all out of it and everything and how she hadn't returned yet. Then he checked his messages at that time and heard this disturbing phone call that Hitomi had made an hour or so earlier. I really wanted to tell you and San about it last night but I was afraid I would only complicate an unwanted situation. Seems a little late for that now."

"Wait a minute," Cathy thought of such things for a second. "But none of these things could have gotten Amano that mad. Was it that disturbing phone call or something that could have tipped him off the edge?"

"Probably, probably that and what I told him of the phone call. See, it was from Hitomi calling from the Ramada. That's where she was last night."

"Where is that?"

"Oh, it's a well-known hotel downtown, I had NO idea why Hitomi would be there and neither did Amano, and moreover I only wonder how she got there because she had no money on her that I remember, and downtown is a good way off from here on foot. Anyway, that's besides the point. She had left a message saying she badly needed Amano's help; some friend of hers had just been in accident."

"Oh my Lord, that's horrible!"

"I know! But he got the message way too late, and his machine had cut her off before she could leave him a way to contact her, seeing as she didn't have her cell. I thought about it for a while... and I just... I just kinda knew who that "friend" must have been. So I told him."

Catherine nodded, starting to actually understand the basic foundation of all of the complications, "This is what got Amano upset, I presume?"

"Well, I think, that is assuming that we're right - assuming that Hitomi had been going downtown to visit... Van Fanel. I mean it sounds crazy, hell yeah, but I kept thinking of those two kids and how they were telling us these impossible things about how they came here with that Van guy, and Hitomi had mentioned wanting to see someone right before she left yesterday. All these things put together made the answer more clearer than crystal, you know?"

"Definitely," Catherine made a heave of a sigh, feeling this problem truly was exerting to the very limits that problems have.

"But that's still weird..." Yukari mused suddenly. "I mean, Amano didn't sound too upset on the phone, he was more worried for Hitomi's safety and Van's safety actually! I didn't tell him about those kids, and I especially didn't mention how they said this Van guy loved Hitomi, I'm not that stupid. Hitomi would have to fess up about that on her own, so I'm not sure why Amano would be so upset... I mean that's crazy! In all of these years I've never heard of him being so mad, it truly isn't like him. He's never even raised his tone with her I don't think... much less do something like he did last night."

"I guess all of the reasons we won't know unless we ask," Catherine stated the inevitable tapping her fingers against the dining table in hopelessness. "And I doubt either of us have what it takes to ask Hitomi, do we?"

"I sure as hell can't," Yukari mumbled in desperation. "And honestly, maybe we shouldn't be poking around just yet anyway. This may root down deeper than we know and if that's the case I don't look forward to making anything worse."

"Yeah, you're right, I--" Catherine was just about to finish her agreement before the sharp tone of a ringing phone jostled through the morning air.

The two remained awkwardly still for a second as the ring went on its third call, each knowing that there was a cord phone in Hitomi's bedroom by where her alarm radio had once been, both wondering if she would be the first to answer it.

The phone rang for the fifth time.

"I got it," Cathy uttered, wishing she didn't have to answer it and just let it be, but she didn't want the piercing sound of the ringing telephone annoying Hitomi in there, or stressing her out. Of course Catherine went after the cord phone by the kitchen, not even wishing to tiptoe into Hitomi's bedroom for the other one.

The phone rang for the sixth time as Cathy kind of oddly stared at it, a thousand case scenarios flooding her head. What if it was someone who wanted to speak to Hitomi? Would Cathy lie and say the girl was busy? But then, what if it was urgent? Hell, what if it was Amano?! What on earth would she do then!

The phone rang for the seventh time, and Catherine (who was adequately disappointed that the other end hadn't hung up yet) grabbed the receiver and sort of held it, afraid to face the other line yet wishing for the telephone's nuisance noise to shut up. "Heeeellloooo..." a dimmed female voice called from within the receiver, which Cathy held about a foot away from her face. "Hello? Anyone there? Or is it 'konnichiwa'? Uh oh.. Mrs. Kanzaki!!! What do I say? 'Hello' or 'konnichiwa'?? Moshi what?? Moshi moshi? Is that what I say? Oh okay, thanks, moshi moshi anyone home? And don't expect me to say that in Japanese because that's just asking for miracles!"

Even at the drabness of today's ups and downs, particularly downs, Cathy had to bite her lip from laughing at San's aloofness, easily portrayed via telephone apparently. She couldn't believe how relived she was to hear San Askielowicz (probably the only person who could receive so much culture shock in such a short amount of time) rather than all of the possible things Cathy had conjured up in her mind.

"Hello San, it's Cathy. You don't know how incredibly funny you sound."

"Oh please Cathy," San bickered laughingly in defense happy to know that someone had actually picked up. "You were a foreigner too just a month ago, don't forget that!"

"I won't..." Catherine smiled. Poor San, she was so very lighthearted it was almost hurtful to hear such a happy tone, knowing that one way or another; San's joyous mood would have to be brought down with some complicated news.

"Who is it?" Yukari asked curiously leaning herself against the refrigerator as she approached. She too was enormously thankful that it sure didn't sound like Amano by Cathy's more friendly expression.

"Oh Yukari, San's on the phone--" She tried to answer before being cut off by the tiny voice in the receiver.

"Yukari's there too? Hey Cathy! What are you guys planning this fun day without me? Can I join in? Pleeease? Please, please, please, please and please?"

Yukari had to hold back a smile too, able to hear San's accentuated words without even being near the telephone. She looked to Catherine sensing that smile fading, remembering that on their innocent drive home last night, they had been planning for a fun-filled girls' day out today with Hitomi, had things not gone so morbidly wrong.

Cathy returned Yukari's confounded expression, lying with the thoughts: "Who should break the news? You or me?"

Yukari, whom Catherine noticed had picked up the golden ring from the table, stared at it inanely and nodded in Cathy's direction, symbolizing that this was one challenge she was willing to face.

"Hey San, it's Kari." Her voice was drab, trying to foreshadow what she eventually would have to say.

"Yukari! Nice to hear from you! Where'd Cathy go? Well, anyway are you guys still up for breakfast ice-cream or what? You guys like gotta totally remind me what the hot spots in Aimsa are, I forgot like ten years ago!"

"Well, actually San," Yukari sighed twirling the cord looking at Catherine helplessly, both wishing that the situation was as fun and exciting as San made it seem. "We really gotta cancel that."

"Seriously?" San began to pick up on the dark and bleak tone. "Cancel everything you mean? Did I miss something?"

"A lot..." Yukari hushed under her breath, glancing at the ring lying within her palms.

"Well, c'mon Kari, spill, this sounds bad."

"Oh but it is. Prepare yourself San, this will be a story you won't like to hear."

* * *

He observed curiously as she knead the dough perfectly, fine hands working like a well-oiled machine. Rhythmic yet fast paced, it wasn't hard to see just how she managed to get everything done. The young woman, not yet past her early thirties, was just so well organized and functioned incredibly systematically, so much so that things and jobs and duties became accomplished without hesitation. However, because of such responsibilities and demands, Angela Ferentini's youth was far from obvious. It was easy to assume she was a few years ahead than what she actually was, because of all the markings time and stress had given her. From all of the dishwashing and cooking, and also cleaning as the high school custodian, Angela's hands wore soft wrinkles along the backs and across her palms. Her hair was never fancy much, pale to dirty blonde ringlets usually tied back in a copious bunch with strands sometimes running down the sides of her pretty face. Although work and worries often did get to her, Shied could tell there was not one challenge that could take away from his Mum's beauty. Her eyes, an amazing azure, were always lively and encouraging, sometimes strict and glaring with command, but always encouraging. Not a hint or hue of makeup would touch her elegant skin, and even when Shied would propose on buying her a cosmetic set along with his Aunt Milerna's, he knew his Mum would only refuse. She was a natural woman who heeded not to the concerns of the outside, but stayed only on the inside with what was important to her. She wore her lips thin, pressed usually in a handsome form never really displaying much on emotion, but every once in a while they would trickle on a smile like no other. Her smile was like brilliance to him, like laughing sunshine to light his days this long, past year. He didn't remember seeing the days come and go as rapidly as they had, for that warm and loving smile was the only thing that would fill his memories of this short yet marvelous time.

"Boy, why you just standing there?" Without even having to turn her back, Angela Ferentini could sense Shied's soft eyes, inspecting her in his astounded silence. A lot of the time, she would question why he would just sometimes sit and look at things, but Shied said he wasn't looking; he was studying, pondering, thinking. She would usually just laugh and go on about her business, but inside a flicker of pride would grow within her, amazed herself to know a boy so young would already possess an ingenious intellectuality that she could only admire. Her little Shied was just so clever.

Wondering why he was slow to respond, Angela reached over and put the stove to low heat, avoiding the spitting crackle of the eggs licking against the oil sending spurts of hot liquid flying rapidly through the air. Trying to calm down the cooking scenario with a spatula in one hand and the panhandle in the other, she finally turned in his direction.

Shied smiled at her curious eyes, still wordless.

"What'cha thinkin' of?" She said, softer this time, keeping her glance on him as the oil war simmered down. Usually, when Shied would just be hanging around doing nothing, she would get him up and going on some chore that was to be done to keep the child busy. It wasn't that she was trying to be hard on him, but Angela secretly understood that Shied liked doing things for her; it was something he wasn't used to. She figured, seeing as he was raised as pampered royalty growing up, Shied was fond of leading what seemed to him like a normal life. She knew he found it more amusing to crack open eggs and measure the brown sugar to make peanut butter cookies, than to analyze which citizens were due with taxes or which roadways called for repair. But for some reason, this time, Angela wasn't going to request anything of Shied. She didn't want him to be busy and distracted, and to instead keep her company as he was, for this day was different. This day was very special.

"You're making panserotti?" He questioned sitting by her on a small stool by the kitchen counter, watching as she centered some tomato paste and chunks of vegetables in the middle of the circular form of dough.

"Um hum," she nodded smiling kindly at him, then added, "your favorite."

"Oh! But they all are!" He exclaimed suddenly in reply, realizing for the first time that the enormous mounds of prepared foods lying throughout the counter top were all of his most preferred dishes. Currently she was working away at her fourth panserotti, a chocolate cake was just about finished with baking, unopened cartons of Chinese food were waiting to be eaten, five or six fresh mangos lay ready to be sliced and served and many more things his eyes could only feast upon and his mouth could only drool at the sight of. Why, Angela must have been up way early that morning to get a head start on all of these mouth-watering, stomach-grumbling foods, either that or she had been planning this for much longer than he knew.

"Mum! You're so nice!" His sapphire eyes lit with his words, filled with energy. "May I help?"

"Of course honey!" Angela laughed mildly, delighted to know he was no short of excited to her cooking contribution, and that she had gotten him so warped with doing chores and household work, that he was voluntarily requesting to join in all by himself.

"But don't you forget about your friends," Dusting off her floured hands on her apron, Angela tilted her head in the direction of the kitchen doorway. "They're probably just waking up, they must be parched. Sleeping on the sofa is no fun duty."

"Should I get them each a glass of apple or orange juice?"

"Apple's out hon, but orange should do fine. You can tell them good morning for me and breakfast should be served shortly, I just gotta get them pancakes done. Please and thank you Shied. I'll make some chocolate pancakes just for you."

"No problem," Shied nodded obediently, secretly delighted to hear of his favourite style pancakes being specially prepared, skipping off his stool and fetching two glasses. As he managed to weasel through the small kitchen towards the refrigerator, he couldn't help but think of his Mum's words she had spoken about a month ago, which were now strong within his thoughts, ever since he had awaken this morning. It still hadn't slipped his mind, and he had been thinking of them every second after they had been uttered. They had been powerful, commanding; yet in all of their entirety, they were sad and touching and thought-provoking. It was just like Angela to try to put up a strong front, and look as if she were only saying the words because she had to, but both her and Shied knew what lay beyond orders and nods. That night, she had asked him kindly that when the day would come, that they would not speak a word of sadness or grief. She had specifically instructed him that that day would be special, but not sad. His Mum had said she wanted to see no tears or feel no pain. It was kind of ironic actually, because that night, Shied could have sworn he had heard her crying...

The eggs were cooked now, bringing a silence to the ever-bustling kitchen, only filled with the soft morning noises of Angela measuring out the pancake mix or Casey meowing and profusely rubbing her ankles in demand to be fed. In all of its simplicity, it sure looked like the average morning to Shied, especially in these past few weeks since his adopted mother had allowed him to stay home from school. His Mum was working so diligently now, knowing that she had double the amount of people to feed, and also because of reasons that neither her nor Shied wanted to fully address. He didn't want to and wasn't going to question just why she was making all of his favorite meals and not asking him to vacuum or sweep the house, because both her and Shied knew why. This day was special, and that was all there was to it. Although the two of them tried so hard to conceal whatever they thought and go about as if it were a day like any other, the little actions and insignificant things were just what symbolized how different these precious last hours would come to be.

Angela lifted her head slightly, as she carefully poured the pancake mixture into the pan and smiled at Shied. The smile was comforting, yet he could simply sense that it was also weak and frail. He knew she was thinking of the very same things, of just how special everything was.

* * *

"You have to be kidding me," San whispered the words quietly, trying to be optimistic in her words but sensing her tone was even more depressive and anxious than before. San knew what she was like when she worried over something: she would pull back her hair furiously with her hands and her words would stutter and become somewhat repetitive, just as she was doing now. She couldn't come to familiarize with any sort of happiness or joking behavior in Yukari Uchida's voice. It was all serious, so serious that she just didn't want to accept it anymore.

"I can't believe this. You mean Amano just left her, like that??"

"We don't' really know for sure," Yukari replied hesitantly from the other end, hands still examining the yellow loop lying against her palm. "And trust me, I doubt we'll ever know the full details on exactly what happened, but he left his ring here if that's evidence enough."

"His engagement band?" San's eyes widened and her words lowered in volume at saying such things, feeling that reality was nothing but utterly horrible. "That's terrible."

"It is," Yukari couldn't help but agree, nudging the cord phone against her shoulder as she leant her weight against the wall. She had just managed to succeed in what she didn't want to do, which was to totally break down San's spirit second after second. It was hard to even imagine that the girl had called full of good and happy intentions, seeming more colourful than a rainbow or even brighter than a firefly. Her personality glowed in that way, lively and vivacious, but anybody that was anybody couldn't resist but to drop down in mood when it came to discussing the issue at hand. She couldn't think of or come with anyone who would be smiling at a time as trying and confusing as this.

"Does she have any ideas?" Cathy inquired from beside her as she mopped the kitchen floor to what Yukari recalled must have been the third time in just that hour. She had known from Hitomi's once happy stories that Catherine was something of a clean freak, but even then the floor couldn't be shinier if the girl were to go down on her knees and were to wax and polish it for fifty days on end. Then again, Yukari also knew that in times of tribulation many people did repetitively what they did best or at least what they can do, which is probably why Yukari had been playing around with the inanimate ring for so long, just because for a few seconds it could provide a minor distraction from all of the arising problems, just as Cathy found the continuous cleaning of the floor to bring Hitomi and Amano's situation a little further from her mind.

"Sorry, I'm fresh out," San had overheard Catherine's question, taking in a heave of a deep breath. What kind of idea would anybody have at this time anyway? Even if she thought about it, San knew she wouldn't be able to devise a plan or action that could possibly bring about a good scenario in this case. The most any of them could do that would neither be beneficial nor distracting would be just to stand or sit and do inane things just like they were already doing. It may seem lazy and uncaring, but truthfully, it was the only thing they could do without risking on making matters worse. If those two girls were to confront Hitomi, they would be taking the chance on upsetting her and making San's cousin even more depressed, and if they were to try to get something out of Amano, chances are such uncalled for actions might entice his anger. The separated couple were at totally different ends of the spectrum at the time, and it seemed as if the three confounded bridesmaids lay smack in the middle.

Catherine paused her cleaning to contemplate for a second, noticing anyway that her mop was literally dry after having encircled most of the house four or five times already. She lay her chin above her yellow latex hands which lay just on top of the mop handle (seeing as Catherine was barely a foot taller than her cleaning utensil). She couldn't help but notice the way Yukari simply stood where she was, no notion of communication coming from her and not a peeping sound emitting from a tiny voice on the other line. It surely did seem as if simultaneously all three of them had smashed right into a mental dead end. But there had to be a way out of this, if not an easy solution, than possibly even a difficult one would put an end or at least commence an ending to these rather complicated problems. It was only the matter of which of these not-so-easy solutions did they want to take on first.

"You're thinking what I'm thinking, aren't you?" Yukari looked to Catherine, noticing that same grimacing yet accepting glance glower upon her face. It was the look of someone, of anyone, who just didn't want to do what was truly unavoidable. Catherine and Yukari knew that as their duty as devout bridesmaids and having been friends with Hitomi and Amano for however long, it was their absolute responsibility to fix what they could in any way they can, even if the only methods possible may risk making the situation even worse.

"Do we have any choice?" Catherine verbalized her thoughts in hopelessness. "If we don't go up to her now, things will only be left unanswered for all of us."

"You're right, I know," Yukari sighed an agree. It seemed as if the deal were struck, subconsciously even. Whether they liked it or not, whether she would like it or not, Hitomi Kanzaki would be the person Cathy and Yukari would soon have to face.

"You've guys thought of something?" San's voice piped up from the other end, as she practically had to contain herself from tearing off a fingernail with her teeth. This suspense was truly getting to her; after all, San had thought it would be marvelous being allowed to stay in Aimsa for as long as she would be because of the supposed "peace" and "fun" of the idea. She had had such great hopes for these weeks before the wedding, knowing that she could be involved in not just the one-time ceremony, but all of the pre-planning and flutters of excitement and anticipation with her utmost favorite cousin and friends. That's exactly how San had envisioned it in her mind, picture perfect, as many imagined daydreams come to be. Really, it hadn't seemed too farfetched at the time. It wasn't her fault she hadn't thought of inserting a half-human and half-cat species in there, or maybe angry fiancés who looked more irritated with their own lovers than anything else. It's not to say that San didn't know how to handle a problem, or didn't expect problems once in a while, but truthfully and honestly this had to be the single one problem where she neither saw it coming or knew just how to go about it.

"I think we have to talk to her," Yukari stated what even her lips had to struggle to say. She didn't like knowing the fact, much the less speaking it into the open air, but there was no denying that if they wanted to help, they should not be afraid to help. Whatever may come, they could always still congratulate themselves for at least trying and attempting a solution.

"You're going to talk with her? Have you lost it? I thought you said she was in a sour mood," San couldn't quite come to believe their intentions. Sure, it did spare her from having to be in the confrontation too, but still it didn't seem like a logical decision. She knew well that when Hitomi did not want to talk, the girl would not come to even utter a word. Although Hitomi was almost always pleasant and cooperative, she was still a human being and her downsides would sometimes become apparent just like with anybody else.

"Like Cathy said, we don't have much of a choice," Yukari answered, hesitant with the words the longer time went by. "I mean, it's at least me and Cath here -- there's two of us. It may make her feel better or worse to have two shoulders to cry on... but we can't just leave her in there crying all by herself..."

"True, San regrettably agreed, feeling the words were wheedled out of her in defeat. Yukari and Catherine were there with Hitomi as of now, so honestly they were probably the only ones who could estimate just how approachable Hitomi was at this time, and if they felt that they might be productive in confronting her, then who was San to object? After all, she was here in her Aunt Hikoro Kanzaki's home, a short way away but still quite far enough to be unable to make much of a difference in that confrontation. She didn't want to label herself as useless (although she couldn't quite help that since, being the newcomer, she had barely any knowledge on the turbulent rise and falls of these relationships) but it was also equally hard to provide any helpful insight. She wanted to recall a time when she could remember her cousin being so upset, so utterly miserable, but San highly doubted that Hitomi's skinned knees or that one bad report card could adequately match up to the high standards that were set by this problem. This situation was unparalleled by any other, at such a magnitude of its own that any action would probably be more ineffective than beneficial or destructive. Just what did they have to lose?

"How are we gonna do this?" Catherine couldn't help but input, wondering if she was actually curious enough to plan out a strategy, or if she was just finding ways to buy herself time from the dreading moment.

"She sounds awake enough to talk with us," Yukari thought aloud. "So we'll just have to go in there, as kindly as possible, and ask whatever comes to mind first."

"Just how unstable is she?" San couldn't help but worriedly ponder.

"Let's just say out of all the things Hitomi's emotions has put her though," Yukari stated dryly remembering clearly all of those things. "This has to be the worst of them all."

"Wow... I see..." San answered, feeling a little distracted from the full response she had wanted to say as she heard soft footsteps behind her. Hitomi's old home had been so quiet; she hadn't realized her talking echoed easily. She had noticed too when she had first arrived that the Kanzaki residence was almost a mirror-image of what it was like back when she had last visited a few years ago. Its look had never changed or retired, much to her delight since she could find it so familiar. Everything still had a touch of Hitomi in it, even though that girl herself had been gone for a year going to two now. San held her hand over the receiver with her palm, as she turned to face behind her.

Hikoro Kanzaki was up and about, aged but pretty face smiling at her niece. Her worn, graying black hairs hidden in a mound of towel sat upon her head, as she had just emerged from a morning shower. San could still identify without difficulty the facial similarities that Hitomi and Hikoro shared. It wasn't so much eye colour or hair colour, but the round, gentle way of their eyes or their soft, fine skin that held the most similarities. San knew that most of Hitomi's Caucasian attributes came directly from her late father, of whom they both slightly remembered from their younger days when San would come to visit with her mother, Kassa Askielowicz. They would not only come to visit Hitomi and Hikoro, but also Hitomi's father, Paul Askielowicz, who was Kassa's brother and San's uncle, and the reason why they were related to Hitomi in the first place. It was when both San and Hitomi reached the age of nine when their relationship was equally strengthened. San's father, Anthony Woitowicz, had divorced her mother and so Kassa took custody and since then both San and Kassa have been using their maiden names. The same went with Hitomi when, in the same year, her father, San's uncle, had died in a tragic plane crash. It had hit Hikoro like a lightning bolt, so much to the extreme where San remembered that she had kept it secret from Hitomi for almost five months. San's mother Kassa was burdened by it too, after having been in a recent divorce and now having lost her only brother. It had been then that the Askielowicz family had came to Aimsa and stayed for near to three depressing months. It had been San's worst visit ever to Japan, remembering being so young and having to face Hitomi who looked more broken than shattered glass. That had been the day of Paul Askielowicz's funeral, or more so memorial, with San's mother mourning over the loss of her brother, and Hikoro and Hitomi being much beyond consolation. It had been so trying for the two... but Hikoro Kanzaki had always been a strong woman. Hitomi grew up without a hint of fault within her, and the next time San had visited it was like things were normal again. Hikoro was tough with Hitomi, yet she was wise. Still, even with that thought in mind, San had a hard time imagining that Hikoro Kanzaki wasn't really a blood relative of hers. Although she didn't get the chance to visit often, the Kanzakis were as close to family to her as any of her relatives had ever been, if not closer.

Now, Hikoro's smile was gentle, much like San's had once been before the "news" had been broken to her. If anything, San hoped that Hikoro would never find out about it, or else it might just be like living the exterior trauma of that heart-wrenching memorial all over again. It was such a pity; San had thought this visit would be the most perfect of them all. Never did she realize just how extremely difficult that perfection is to attain.

"Is that Hitomi on the phone?" Hikoro inquired, slowly unwrapping the towel as strands of wet black came falling down her face, lined with soft yet wrinkling smiles. "I hope you girls have fun today, but tell Hitomi, Yukari and Catherine to drop by here first together and pick up you and the Hyundai. It'll be no fun if you all have to take the train to get around, and since Yukari and Catherine can drive, you girls can have the car all day if you'd like."

San couldn't help but pause, feeling her heart flutter sadly at such joy-affiliated words in which she would usually throw a fit of happiness, as her eyes fell upon the white phone cradled on her shoulder. Yukari hadn't piped a word just yet on the other end, and San couldn't help but allow her hand to slip off the receiver to make the girl aware of the stuck situation San was in.

"Ummm.... I...." San could hear herself stammering, practically stuttering again, knowing she was in a fetish for words that didn't exist. She couldn't make up an excuse in fast enough time that wouldn't involve flat-out lying. San more or less liked to avoid topics rather than lie about them, but San also knew that Hikoro was a very straightforward and disciplined person as she always has been. There had never been a day when San would have stayed over and her and Hitomi would successfully get away with anything. Hikoro, like many mothers, had a round the clock watch and omniscient knowing on the happenings of her children and all who they related with.

"As a matter of fact," Hikoro continued, placing the towel on top of the sofa and motioning to San to hand her the telephone, much to San's dismay, "I do need to speak to her myself. That girl needs a good talking. I told her to call Timothy and Alexandra about a million times now but the girl is getting careless with her duties... so close to the wedding!"

Hikoro let out an exasperated sigh, managing a smile to San, "You don't mind if I cut in, do you hon? It'll only be a minute, I just can never seem to catch Hitomi at a convenient time."

'Well, now's far from convenient...' San couldn't help but grumble in her thoughts, feeling like she was much too overweighed now with these problems. She also knew that this was delaying Catherine and Yukari from speaking with Hitomi, as they were hopefully thinking of ways to help San escape from Hikoro's prying eyes.

"Actually, I'm speaking to Yukari," she confessed truthfully, deciding that much didn't hurt.

"Really?" Hikoro looked confused as she glanced at the glowing green display of her telephone. "I thought I read Hitomi's number on the call display."

"Oh, she's at Hitomi's house," San fessed up again, feeling she was now making matters worse. Yukari confirmed that.

"Gosh, San, what's happening? She wants to speak to Hitomi?" Yukari's worried voice came loudly across the line. "She can't do that! Hell, we can't even do that! I don't think Hitomi's gonna be one happy camper talking to her mother right now. Trust me, it's not a good idea."

San didn't know how to reply, after all, Hikoro was standing right in front of her and she didn't want to say anything incriminating, much the less tell her aunt that she could not speak with her own daughter. Honestly, how did San just get stuck in such a trivial position? Hadn't she been the one lucky enough to avoid having to confront Hitomi? This felt just as intimidating, if not worse!

"I have no idea what to do," she hushed quickly into the receiver, saying the words for Yukari's sake and hoping they were just beyond earshot of Hikoro. "But...." she raised her head and smiled in her aunt's direction, "would you like to speak with Yukari, Auntie? I guess she wants to say hello."

"WHAT??" Yukari's astonished exclamation came blasting through the receiver, louder than ever could be. No matter however long it had been that the Kanzaki and Uchida family had known each other, Yukari couldn't deny the fact that somewhere rooted within her, she held a great fear towards Hikoro Kanzaki. After all, the woman had put her own daughter, Yukari's best friend, through three years of psychiatric treatment! During those years, Hitomi had never smiled when she saw her mother, other times she would actually be quite normal, but never around Mrs. Kanzaki. It had only been fairly recently when Hitomii's relationship with her mother had started to truly smoothen over, but even then Yukari understood that those void-like doubts still were like massive unfilled gapes. Since Yukari had grown up with Hitomi, she also shared Hitomi's immediate respect to Hikoro Kanzaki, never wishing to challenge the woman's authority. So if this was the case, even when Yukari was a good grown 20-year-old woman, how on earth was she supposed to explain to Hikoro that her only daughter, once labeled crazy by her own mother, was now temporarily "un-engaged" because of an encounter with somebody that she secretly loved from a different planet...

Hell, Yukari was in shit and loads of it. She didn't have one clue what to do, and whether on the phone or not, she felt petrified. Why hadn't San explained it all? She seemed to get so much better along with Hikoro than anybody else, especially not feeble Yukari. San was strong. Catherine was strong. Hitomi was strong, even at moments that should have broken her down completely. Yukari didn't like to be that solitary, she liked to have people around to help her in such situations. She wasn't weak, Yukari could be quite the intolerable force when she wanted to be, but that was only against certain people. Prestige figures like the wise and powerful "mother-of-the-best-friend" were people she did not like to associate with in high-level situations such as these.

"Hi there, Yukari," Hikoro's voice was amiable, so sickeningly amiable that it purely frightened Yukari to imagine when that once friendly voice would eventually transform into nothing short of a demon's growl. All parents are alike when they're angry... they are just plain scary, even when your adult yourself. Yukari's mother was no short of terrifying when furious, on a scale of Hellish beings standing as the minions, whereas Hitomi's mother was practically Lucifer himself. That's no offense meant to Hikoro of course, but she was nothing short of difficult when things don't go her way.

"So how are you so early in the morning Yukari? I haven't' spoken to you in a while either."

"Oh... it's been great," Yukari stammered, realizing just how much of a gigantic lie or phrase of horrible sarcasm that previous statement had been.

Catherine observed in anxiousness, holding onto the mop so tightly she wouldn't be surprised if it lost colour where she grasped. She had been following along on what was happening, but Cathy didn't have too much knowledge on Hitomi's family. She didn't have to have too much knowledge apparently, for just judging by Yukari's often "For-the-love-of-it-woman-SAVE-ME!" looks Cathy knew that it was quite possible that Hitomi's mother was less of an approachable figure than Hitomi was at this time

"That's good to hear," Hikoro continued, already concocting her over-the-phone lecture to Hitomi about being so careless with her own wedding duties in her mind. "I hope you don't mind me cutting in for Hitomi, it'll only be a couple of minutes. I just need to remind my own daughter something... once again."

Yukari swallowed, practically having to fight off choking from that action, almost feeling invisible sweatbeads forming on her skin. She looked to Cathy pleading for a solution, but knowing there was none she could offer and if any, there were none Hikoro Kanzaki would easily comply to. Yukari knew in all certainty there were only two mouse holes out of this situation, teeny escapes leading to large and unknown places where lurking cats may just be waiting to make situations even worse. Nevertheless, Yukari was no safer stammering like she was, so she had to come and bear reality to the decisions she had to make. It was either to tell Hikoro Kanzaki the flat-out truth (Yukari would much rather omit some of the stranger details but knowing Mrs. Kanzaki she would simply drain them out of Yukari one way or another) or she could go the easy yet also difficult way out for herself-- give Hitomi the telephone. She was actually starting to consider that idea... how bad could it get? Actually, no, that was stupid. That would just put Hitomi through even more stress than she was already going through, and Yukari didn't want to dare do such a thing. She realized now that there was a third and larger mousehole awaiting her, one that led to a small and pitiful feeling towards herself, but it was still an escape nonetheless. She could lie to Hikoro. She hadn't done that before, never had reason to really, but now was as good as reason as anything else. Hitomi wasn't in the mood to chit-chat with anybody and the absolute last person Yukari would pair her up with would be Hitomi's skeptical mother, Hitomi's mother and also Amano Nekuchi. Yukari's bridesmaid mission was to keep those two depressive figures as far away from Hitomi as possible.

"Actually, to tell the truth," 'bad choice of words to start off a lie...' she couldn't help but heckle herself with a pang of guilt, but this was the best way out and she knew it. "Hitomi's really tired right now... she's uh... sleeping."

"Sleeping? Still?"

"Yeah..." Yukari felt even more hesitant, glancing momentarily at her analog watch. It was only 9:30 in the morning, and quite frankly, how early did Mrs. Kanzaki expect Hitomi to be awake anyway? In all truth, had this crisis not arisen, Yukari herself would still be happily tucked in bed for the next few passing hours.

"Well, when she wakes up tell her to please call her mother --"

Then, as Hikoro Kanzaki was interrupted mid-sentence, Yukari's face went a ghastly white. Her slender fingers went instantly rigid, near to crushing the plastic of the phone within her hands, then jelly and flimsy having to keep that phone from falling out of her grasp. Paled, stock-still and ruptured with tension, she knew she couldn't deny it. She couldn't deny what she had just heard.

Somebody else had just picked up. Someone else was now on the line.

'Maybe it's San, maybe it's San!!' Yukari instantly started chanting in the words in her head, hopeful yet hopeless, knowing first of all that it couldn't possibly be Catherine for the girl stood right before her. But then again, why was she hoping for something that couldn't be concerning San? Yukari knew that it probably wasn't San. The Kanzaki residence only had one phone that she remembered. There were only two lines in this conversation, and the other end had only one phone hooked up with no chance of someone else 'picking up'. However, this place, this present home of Hitomi's had two phones with three different people. Two of those persons were around one phone. Yukari had that phone, Catherine stood with her. There was only one other person who had the ability to be the third in this anxious conversation, only one person in that one room with that one other phone.

"Hello Mother." Hitomi said.

* * *

"Amano?"

"You know what, if you're trying to hide this from me, you're doing a pretty lousy job."

"Maybe that' s because I don't have anything to hide."

"Oh really, is that so?"

"Um… Mr. Nekuchi?"

"Yeah. Really. And you know something? You can leave me the hell alone now. I'm tired of this stupid conversation. If you don't want to trust me, then that's your problem. Deal with it."

"Trust you? How can I trust you? I asked you for a very simple answer, Hitomi, as simple as it can come and yet you still fail to answer me. It was a yes or no question, but who cares now because I think we both know the answer… I think we're both perfectly aware that you are in total love with this guy. You love him don't you? Sure, of course you do. I know you just-"

"Why don't you just shut your face? You know something Amano? You don't know shit about me! You'll NEVER understand me Amano, do you get that?"

"I'll never understand you?! What in the hell is that supposed to -"

"Yeah. That's right. You're too fucking stubborn to see it or even care. All you are thinking is 'oh, of course it has to be someone else'. You won't even consider that it could be another reason, would you? Of course not! You just don't care for me - at all."

"Really? REALLY? Oh come on, what bullshit, Hitomi. What bullshit. I don't care for you - is that it? You mean my constantly being there for you and providing for you for these last four long as hell years is what you consider 'not caring'?"

"Oh good for you, so you're loaded with cash and brains, I don't really give two shits about that that Amano, because you know what? Where was your care when I really needed you… not your stupid money. Where were you when I wanted to talk to someone about my visions or-"

"Oh, don't bring this crap up right now-"

"No, see? This is exactly what I have to put up with… you and you're stinking skepticism. Is that called caring? Even now you won't even try being open-minded. Where are you Amano when I really need you? You just abandon me, that's all you do, and all you ever do. You don't want to confront what I have to say, you don't even attempt it… you're just too busy on your little dates with Yukari, isn't that right…? Yeah, I thought so."

"Amano Nekuchi?"

He spun around so abruptly, that he nearly collided with a passing janitor cart, only seconds from having spilt the bucket of sloshing cleaning fluid all across the already slippery halls. Flashing the hospital cleaning lady with a sheepish yet apologetic smile as he helped re-balance a group of sagging mops into a manageable bundle, Amano quickly redirected his attention to whom had been calling on him so repetitively with light taps to the shoulder, feeling his cheeks flourish with embarrassment at his lack of attention.

Kaye Joi, only two years his senior, returned his dazed glare with a look of curiousity and interest, holding about a dozen clipboards to her chest and peering at him inquisitively through small-frame lenses. Although a relatively little person, Kaye, to Amano, still held the power of three medical surgeons in his darned opinion. Upon joining the apprenticeship program, Amano, knowing him, would settle for no less than the best of the best of an instructor, and after being assigned Kaye he had been quite disappointed to see on just how young of age she was, and the fact that she herself was nothing more than an assistant nurse. Why, that had been the position he had been interested in applying for! Amano had figured he'd hopefully get a medical nurse or a specialist to be able to help around, but Willendorf General Hospital was constantly booked with eager apprentices from his neighbouring Willendorf Medical University, so to him, it wasn't a surprise to be just teamed up with anyone. However, it wouldn't be long after until his opinions would easily sway concerning Kaye. It became evidently clear to him eventually, that she took her role as his senior to the utmost of importance. He was her only pupil, which made the work twice as hard and even more demanding, not to mention that she had graduated top of her class from Willendorf. In just the first few days of his spring holidays he already had practically all of the hospital halls mapped in memory, and not to mention all of the little homework assignments that Kaye gave to him to research on the medical program she had also instructed him to download. It was incredible - she was such a young and tiny representative of a whole lot of success.

"You look distant." Kaye stated the words easily, studying his eyes so intently as if reading the dialogue of his thoughts. "There's something bothering you, I suppose?"

"Eh…" Amano stammered for a second, realizing just how easily his mind drifted. He couldn't help but find it unfortunate to know that Kaye had caught him dawdling; she knew it wasn't like him to be acting offset, feeling that today he was a thousand times more offset than usual.

"It's really nothing," Amano waved it off confidently with the back of his hand; yet knowing every utterance of that was not of the truth. "I was just… thinking of things."

"I see," Kaye smiled, half supportively, half questionably, yet still without much hesitation, she adjusted her long, white sleeves and handed Amano the heaping pile of clipboards with countless blank data sheets.

"I take it you're still up for work, are you not?"

"Of course, ma'am," Amano nodded his head slightly, brown bangs fraying, receiving the new bundle in his arms, feeling a little weighed with his words. Although his smile was one of eagerness and his eyes shone with ability, truly, Amano just didn't feel up to his usual little chores today… it just wasn't to his best interest. He wasn't typically lazy and far from being anything much of a procrastinator, but little things seemed to wear him down these past few hours. It was almost as if there weren't much ways that he knew of in which he could just have what would be like a normal day. On the outside, friends and companions of his may assume it was a normal day for him, yet Amano knew better than that judgment. Today had been far from a normal day ever since he had awakened from his little to few hours of sleep. That exhaustion had caught up with him, along with the dreadfully heavy emotional baggage that he kept so well under wraps. Amano, though being generally sociable, was the not the type to reveal just about anything to the public, and so his actions and words were still sugar-coated with that usual joust of positive energy and enthusiasm, yet inside, he knew he felt nothing of the case. Bit by bit, the harsh reality and the sour fakeness of his pretend-happy life were beginning to gnaw on his insides, his memories becoming yet more vivid, his worries more intense, and his heart more strangled with confusion and apprehension. He was coming to realize slowly how incredibly fragile his future was now, balancing inexperienced on the high wire of life, suddenly as if coming to terms that if he didn't do something to turn around this rather emotionally tormenting situation, fact had it nothing would and he would be feeling this guilty yet angry way for a long time to come.

"You are to come with me," Kaye didn't give him much time to think however, as she tugged his irresponsive self by the sleeve of the usual nurse-green uniform as she began walking onwards down the hall in front of him, heels smacking loudly as she smiled at passing hospital staff.

"But I already know how to post up the clipboards," Amano couldn't help but argue uselessly in his defense, for some reason wishing so much to be home and doing nothing, or at least alone to his own philosophizing solitude. He was used to being at the hospital for long hours, usually going to his apprentice program (of which he did get paid a small yet fair amount for) after his med classes, and even now during the break he would find himself doing all the doctors' small duties throughout the length of the day. It was great experience, but now Amano did not want to be here. He didn't feel eager, or inspired, or longing to know more. He didn't feel that he wanted to be helpful or insightful. He no longer felt the urge to greet every person with a nod or handshake, and didn't care for any greetings anyway. Amano was sick of being concerned about everyone and everything else, he had enough problems as it was, and none of these could escape his mind. It still wrenched at him, the guilt as if anew, the frustration as if rekindled. He was at a loss on whether he should be still furious, or sad, or envious or confused… for he was but all of these things. The only thing he knew for certain was that everything that he now did was nothing but tiresome and consuming of time not so well spent.

"Yes, I know you do," Kaye turned to him momentarily. "But I thought you asked me to show you how the IBET monitoring systems work. There's only one vacant room right now where I can possibly tinker around with the machines without having to worry about another patient coming in."

"Oh yes, that's right, I'm sorry," Amano hurried the words, scolding himself for being so easily forgetful. Kaye marked the smallest things into her mind, and noticing that Amano was acting distracted at times of duty was one thing he didn't want her thinking of.

"You know you don't have to do so many hours Nekuchi," she paused for a second, so quickly that he had to fight from stumbling against her, as she stared up at him with eyes prying. It was apparent what she was doing, the usual "you-can-turn-back-now-if-you-can't-handle-it" kind of tactic, one that Kaye would often apply in order to break down Amano when he felt weary or anxious to quit. Most of the time it had little to no effect on him, her testing his enthusiasm only making him more apt for the job, but this time was different. For the first occasion in his eager days of dreaming of his medical success, Amano felt like immediately abandoning it all to a soft couch, a pile of junk food regardless of nutrients, a bunch of tacky TV shows or unsolvable crossword puzzles, and a whole lot of depression.

"I'm fine." But no, he couldn't do it; Amano knew he would only be prone to more thinking and heartaches at home. He needed to keep distracted, lest he break down himself into a sopping and confused emotional heap.

"Alright," Kaye still used a testing voice, unsure of Amano's response. "But you've worked here a good deal, Amano, that's great but don't forget that you need your own time too. There's nothing much here for you than the little stuff anyway."

'The little stuff'… she had a point when he though of it, especially since lately he hadn't been doing much activity that couldn't be easily accomplished by any passing commoner. There really wasn't any medical expertise required in what he was doing, but nevertheless he couldn't complain. These kind of working hours, whether totally useless or not, still looked promisingly handsome on the resume. Besides, his professor had promised him a unique opportunity for all of his devoted work to Willendorf, and that was actually getting to spend a day in the forensic department next week. It wasn't so much the fact that he got to ogle over decaying cadavers that fascinated him so, but the fact that he, a mere medical student, would be able to help out for the entire day! It was a rare opportunity indeed, one that he so avidly awaited, and wished he could only tell the whole world about. Amano got worked up over the tiniest things when on duty, tiny things he'd often like to share. But today, no matter what good things would become of him, no matter if his lottery ticket came up a winner, no matter if he scrambled upon a blank cheque on the way home, it still didn't seem to matter. It seemed as if Amano had no one to tell…. no one to tell at all no matter what would come to happen. He just didn't feel comfortable in being 'happy' today when there was no one to share such happiness with.

"I can't believe you're doing this, trying to twist everything around like that."

"I'm not trying to twist around anything."

"Please, yes you are. How could you even throw your best friend into this? Yukari has nothing to do with the problem here."

"Oh bullshit Amano, I know you've had feelings for-"

"Correct, that's right. I have had feelings for her… but that was like four years ago when I had gone out with her, Hitomi, I won't deny that much. But you, what about you? What are you denying?"

"You still have feelings for her, I know it."

"I already told you that I don't. How much more proof do you need? How much proof do you have? Don't accuse me of anything that you do not have the evidence to back up your alibi for."

"Well then, quit accusing me of something you do not have evidence for, Amano."

"I don't have evidence for? I have plenty of evidence Hitomi - plenty. Such as with just now, I asked you a very simplified question, and yet you didn't respond. Somehow, our conversation-"

"'Conversation' my ass, it's an argument now thanks to you."

"Yeah, you know what, I don't care what in the hell it is; you can call it whatever you want. But the point of the matter being is that you managed to not answer my question ever… not even indirectly and if that's not proof enough, I don't know what is."

"You are being such a-"

"I'm going to ask it one more time, Hitomi. Just once more, and this time if in that angered little heart of yours, do you have any… just even a soft enkindling of love towards me, you'll promise you'll answer this. Will you answer me Hitomi? Just this once?"

"That's not fair, Amano. I don't even know what you are going to ask."

"If you loved me, you would answer any of my questions."

"Amano…please don't do this. You know we're in the middle of a fight, it's not fair to throw in the whole 'love' concept into it… it's just inappropriate right now."

"When lovers fight even the harshest words can't overthrow the still love they bear within their hearts. Are you asking me to stop demanding things of you… because there is no love in that still heart of yours?"

"Amano… I… it's not that… it's just that…"

"Hitomi, it's alright if you can't answer, that's not the question I have for you. Hitomi, I'm angry right now, as the same I am saddened, as I know you are. Look, I don't want things to fall apart right now."

"You know I don't either! I wanted us to be happy…"

"We both did, I know that. But I'm asking for the truth Hitomi, I'm not asking for what will make us happy. I know I love you as much as I ever have… but if that love is not returned… then that is beyond my control."

"Amano…"

"I want us to be happy, but pretending to be happy people won't get us anywhere… now, Hitomi, if you even remotely care for me, love me, tell me you'll speak the truth now."

"…I care for you Amano… I will speak the truth. What would you like to know?"

"Thank you. Hitomi, I need to know this, I just need to hear it for myself. Hitomi, please be honest, do you love Van Fanel?"

"…the pulse rate. Fascinating isn't it?"

The young Chinese assistant nurse looked to him with a sideways smile, feeling as if her long educational lecture on the various usages of the newly released IBET hospital monitoring systems had just been to no avail. He had gazed at her hand tapping on the surface of the bulky device, with eyes looking as if he wasn't even in the same dimension, seeming as if her once eager pupil was being eaten away by something much more demanding. She honestly couldn't say that she had ever seen a day when Amano would be so incredibly unfocused; normally, he would be intrigued by something like the IBET machine but today seemed to be off normal for him. She figured the stress levels the kid put on himself had finally managed to catch up with him; with all of the strenuous work Amano put himself through, she had no ounce of surprise that he would become a little dazed. She hadn't been in the apprenticeship program for very long and Amano had only had an internship at the Willendorf for just a couple of weeks, but the rate at which he learned and became more professional amazed even her, and Kaye was much like that herself. She thought she had been one of the most rigid and fast-paced medical students to attend Willendorf, but Amano was a fine exception as well. Already he was very familiar with many of the head doctors and specialists throughout the building, and flocking with some of the more senior nurses during his breaks, gaining more expertise by the minute. To be honest, she was actually more surprised that he was now showing his fatigue from such fine efforts.

"Yeah… it's uh, great."

Amano looked to her suddenly, trying to hide a rush of pink to his cheeks, well aware that he hadn't been paying one second of attention. He had wanted to, but just didn't, and was now ashamed just by the prying way that she stared at him. She knew that he hadn't even been listening, and it embarrassed him highly; he felt so irresponsible and ungrateful to how she had taken him all the time and effort to show him to this empty hospital room to recollect her knowledge on the machines to someone who didn't even have enough courtesy to listen. But it wasn't like he could help himself… his memories were very powerful, and the last one he had just had kept Amano in a state of discomfort. It was so just so vivid, as if the words were escaping his mouth a second time, as if the tightness of the air was strangling him all over again.

"Amano," Kaye brought her hand to her hip, laying her weight on one side as if tapping her other foot in analysis. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Yeah… yeah…I'm fine." Amano waved it off, feeling less enthusiastic or truthful with his words each time, but saying it regardless. He couldn't let her break him down so easily, or else then Kaye would know that Amano was susceptible to such emotional weakness. He had to stay on top of the game. He had to remain alert, though he sure didn't feel that he wanted to at this moment. Still, Amano had to make an effort.

"So how come this room is empty?" He lifted his gaze to his surroundings for the first time, barely even remembering when she had walked him to this room feeling his strong memories had taken out a chunk of his real life as it absorbed all that he noticed. "I thought it was really hard to find any empty rooms in this ward."

"It is; very observant Amano," Kaye complimented him, feeling he needed to hear the words at least once this day. It had been keen of him to notice though, especially since this room being empty was under very special circumstances.

"It's really the strangest story I've known thus far," Kaye sighed, trying not to pay mind to the fact that she really didn't understand it. She just loathed not being able to understand, just like Amano loathed such inabilities.

"A strange story? In this rigid place?" Amano did his best to focus on the topic at hand.

"Yeah, funny isn't it? You'd expect this place to be so orderly… but strange things happen. Amano, you have to promise you won't tell anybody this though," she looked to him with a sense of trust. She knew just how amazingly responsible he already was, there really was no reason to even ask if he would keep such things confidential, but just because he was acting a tad bit off today she couldn't help but find herself a little wary of him as well.

"Of course, sure, as long as you didn't like… kill anyone or anything."

"Right, like a little person like me managed to kill somebody," Kaye laughed, glad to see that Amano still possessed his comedic sense of imagination even in his most depressive of times. "It's more of the eerie and supernatural than anything else."

"Supernatural? Like as in ghosts, or something like that?" Amano didn't like the sound of it. He didn't like supernatural things. He didn't like things or aspects that were not so tangible and easily known. It wasn't so much religious ideas that he was wary of, but more so things like visions or extra terrestrials or far out ideas such as those… things that he just had to deal with fairly recently.

"Well, I don't really know how to explain, much the less classify, it really…" Kaye wandered off in thought, gazing at the empty bed controlling shudders from coming upon her. "I don't get it. It was just like one second the patient was there, and the next, he wasn't."

Amano raised an eyebrow; skepticism had the best of him, "What do you mean? He purposely left the hospital without anyone noticing?"

"I'd love to think that, I would," she answered Amano unsurely. "But the thing is, we checked the ward security and entrance surveillance - there was no record of him ever leaving or at least physically checking out of the hospital, plus nobody even saw him leave. What was strangest was the fact that his room blinds were shut when they didn't have to be, and when we finally did get in the room… the far window was wide open."

"Window?" Amano's head turned instantly in the direction of the room's single window, buried in the furthest wall from him, now shut and hidden away by another set of blinds. However, he didn't have to be able to see outside to know that he was eleven stories above ground level. If Kaye was getting at what he was assuming she was getting at, he just couldn't understand how such a thing could be plausible.

"You're not seriously suggesting that he would have…"

"Well, no, not really. You know you and I are much alike - we're not the superstitious people imagining injured folk just climbing out of windows and balance off ledges eleven stories above ground. I'm just saying that no one can explain his sudden exit of the hospital, however it may have been, or why the window would have been left so wide open as it was."

"Do you think he would have managed to leave the hospital on his own? If his injuries were really serious, chances are this could have been an inside job and somebody assisted him to go unnoticed."

"I thought of that, but he looked fine enough to get about… not quickly and probably on a limp - we were going to suggest that he use crutches for a while to ease off the pressure on his wounded leg - but that still doesn't explain how he got out unseen by anyone, because he would have been seen by the elevator cameras because there's no way in hell that kid got down the stairwells."

"That's uh… a puzzler alright. But who did you say this man was again? Maybe he just couldn't afford the medical bills and found some desperate way to escape from here."

"That's an even more confusing story," Kaye let out a sigh. "I just don't understand it. See, this man, he wasn't any regular patient - you're right, he probably couldn't afford the medical bills because I highly doubt he's all that he seems to be, but it doesn't matter, the authorities had the costs covered anyway."

"Authorities?" Amano was amazed; he was actually beginning to develop some intrigue on this odd case, at least just enough to keep his memories from flooding his mind again.

"Yes, officials, a detective really. She had come shortly after he arrived, saying he was a main… I don't know… suspect maybe in some incident that happened by the hotel. Did you hear about it on the news? Weird stuff."

"I didn't catch it I don't think," Amano didn't want to think of the news, for he knew that the news was at eleven at night and he would usually watch it on a daily basis to keep updated on the Aimsa affairs, except that last night he had still been driving home at eleven, much too miserable to care about the other miseries of his local world. But now, he really didn't like the thought of thinking about any accidents yesterday, for one surely came to mind, bounding him with ugly discomfort.

"I managed to. They said something about how there was a near-to accident at the Ramada-"

"Ramada Hotel?" Amano interrupted her mid-sentence. He just had to. There was no way he would get around that concept without making sure of it. He didn't like the sound of that… he didn't like the sound of that at all, the hotel name most especially. For one thing, it was much too familiar. There weren't near-to accidents or accidents at the Ramada to be heard of everyday, but how ironic was it that in just a day and a half he had already managed to hear of two separate stories stressing the same facts; now he was starting to realize that maybe they weren't really two separate stories after all.

"Yep, that's the only one in Aimsa," Kaye stated matter-of-factly, surprised Amano wouldn't know that, or at least wouldn't pay attention to that information. "Something happened with a truck that almost hit a woman and this man saved her, the one that came here, I don't know how or why but somehow the guy got injured in the near-to collision -he a had a severe laceration on his left leg, and according to the detective it was actually from the truck's exhaust pipe."

"Exhaust pipe? As in the one by the truck roof?" He didn't like the sound of this; he really didn't like it at all. It was sounding just too familiar… too likely to be already known to him much to his dismay. It just couldn't be that ironic, could it? Could fate really have sickly tied this in so well? If so, how horribly planned, how horribly synchronized everything was, even when he least wanted it to be. Willendorf was Amano's only form of seclusion… his only refuge and distraction from abounding problems…. He just couldn't cope if this place were to be infested with his anguish also.

"I know it sounds weird," Kaye shook her head, not bothering to try and play with the details a second time - she already found confusing as it was. "But that's how the story goes. As for the guy, he's even stranger. That detective woman even had me run a check on him."

"Run a check? You can do that here?"

"Oh yes, background profiles and all essential information should always be open to us. So anyway, I searched for the guy… an uncommon name… one 'Van Fanel…"

Amano swallowed thickly.

"… and the results were all over the place! None of them matched this guy's description mind you… it was so weird. I figured he was using a fake name or something of the sort…"

Amano could feel the heat build. His eye began to twitch.

"… But anyway, he was dead asleep when I saw him last, then I turned my back, and then Mr. Mysterious was gone. Strange isn't it?"

"Dead asleep…? He should have just been dead."

"Sorry Amano? I didn't catch what you just said. Speak up, hon."

Amano twitched again. His fist began to clench. He stared at the neighbouring hospital bed with enormous distaste, his imagination running freely with its wrath. He could imagine it now… that monstrous man… sleeping there playing innocent like a miserable little baby, dreaming of things that did not belong to him. This was Amano's turf, this was his place of work and play, this was Amano's little sanctuary and damn that man for interfering! This was the very last resort Amano had managed to keep for himself, to hide away from the pestering insistence of that imaginary mongrel, but lo and behold that thief had snuck into his life and stolen all of Amano's valuables. That hideous person had just unknowingly come and screwed everything over; this was Amano's life! His life! That man had no right to just jar in wherever, and more than anything else Amano was furious about, that man had no right to just come in and figure Hitomi was all free for the taking. Amano loved Hitomi and she loved him in return and that's the way it was and should be and should have been for all of eternity! Amano was the one to comfort Hitomi when she cried, or be with her in her happy times. Amano was the one who had her sing-song laughter embedded in memory, her smiling eyes always in thought, and her name tattooed in his heart. Was that not important? Wasn't the gift of time precious to any of them? He didn't have the stinking right to push Amano aside however he pleased, for whatever reason or whatever purpose he knew Hitomi; it didn't deny the strong and solid fact that Amano and Hitomi did share something special. It was undeniable. Four years for the both of them and eight years overall was an incredibly long time growing up in a teenage love, who did he think he was to barge in and take away all that? And now after being close to destroying Amano's loving potential with Hitomi, now this overconfident man had enough nerve to prance around on Amano's territory? That guy was asking for trouble, and giving Amano enough doses of it at the same time.

Suddenly, Amano's heart began to hurt - painfully.

"Seriously, kid, I'm starting to think of sending you home," Kay began to voice her concern, clicking her tongue in disappointment to see Amano was vague again, but worse off than before. Before it had seemed only as if her student were caught in a daydream, a small mental wandering, but now his eyes were glowing and reflecting a much stronger passion. It was a side she had never seen, a persona that was not work-oriented in any way, not influenced by rational decisions or strategic measures, but based solely on the unpredictability of emotion. It was now igniting a flame within Amano that was spiteful yet sad at the same time.

Amano felt dizzy. It reminded him intensely of last night - he was overwhelmed. Anger raged through his testosterone blood, yet a calling began to ache at him - his heart began to throb. Things began to sift through his brain, pounding and calling and arguing for his attention. He so felt like hurting someone, hurting whoever it was that was responsible for his pain… but at the same time he thought of soft things… his last four-year anniversary with Hitomi at Sunset Beach… the way everything had been once so perfect brought about countless sense of feelings unexplainable to the rampaging heart. He didn't know how to feel or react or more so he was doing a terrible job of hiding such confusion.

His finger felt bare.

Kaye studied him worried sick at his failure to respond, watching his eyes glower as if they saw something or as if he felt something that he couldn't enjoy and couldn't share. It was such an inwardly suffering, that Kaye could finally understand why he had come here at such demanding times in the first place - Amano wanted to escape. He had come here to seek refuge but for some reason what she had just mentioned earlier had brought about to him a worse sense of emotional confinement. It looked as if an entire transformation, it was as if Amano was not even remotely the same person he once had been. His eyes reflected the fact that he did not live and thrive along his work as he had done day after day before, but now his only concern was much more personal, much more intimate than it had ever been. With all that Amano had going for him, Kaye knew from a conversation with him from when she met him, that there was only one highly intimate subject that Amano had to be concerned about.

Her eyes fell to his right hand.

There lay four fingers followed by an opposing thumb, each bare and naked as well as his left hand's were also. They acted like an evident symbol of loneliness, unfamiliar to both Kaye and Amano. She studied those hands and stared at those eyes, feeling the pieces as if coming together, yet she could only wonder about what was missing. It was missing… so where was it? Just what had happened? What had occurred to her brightest student to fall into a bottomless well of depression? She desired to ask him so, to inquire about such unpredicted tragedies in his life, yet she felt there was no need for his question. The reasoning behind his sudden melancholic ways was already painted obvious by the tale told by his soul through his eyes.

"Answer me, Hitomi, you said you would."

"I… can't."

"I'm not going to go around in circles here, Hitomi please. Bear with me. You promised you would answer my question… for crying out loud, it's just yes or no!"

"Ama-"

"YES or NO Hitomi, that's all I'm asking for."

"I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? Is that an answer? I'm afraid not. Just fricking answer the question already."

"Amano, let go of me."

"You won't answer my question."

"Let go - now."

"Answer me - now."

"I'm not going to."

"NOT GOING TO?!? NO!?!?Is that the way it's going to be?"

"Amano-"

"Don't talk to me Hitomi! You're inability to answer has proven something to me, it's proven just how much you love this Van-"

"Amano, I-"

"If you want it this way, then fine. Here, take this."

"What? What's this? Your engagement ring?

"Yes it is, how very observant of you. You know what Hitomi, you can keep it."

"What? Why? Amano, can't we talk this out?"

"You obviously don't have what it takes to talk. I can't marry someone who can't

even-"

"Oh my God, Amano, don't tell me you're doing this to me!"

"Well, I am because you're doing what you're doing against me. So you know what? Until you feel that you actually 'want' this relationship of ours, you keep that ring until you have enough honesty to give it back to me."

"Oh my God, Amano… please don't do this…"

"Stop your crying. I gave all the chances you needed Hitomi."

"I'm sorry, I just don't know what's wrong with me!"

"And neither do I, so until you figure it out, the wedding is in your own hands… Goodbye, Hitomi."

"Amano, no… please no…!"

"Hitomi…goodbye."

* * *

Laugh and cry, live and die…
Life is a dream we are dreaming…

Pictures were not worth a thousand words. They were worth millions. She could sense that with each small and memorable photo that her eyes scanned over, frozen in the time of their taking, a time obviously worth recollecting in the image's eternal illustration of emotion and beauty. Some were not as well off as others however, for they were tattered near the edges or embedded with fading colours, due to the fact that Angela had never found the time to organize the hundreds of photos into any sort of classified albums, particularly because she knew it would take quite a few days that she didn't have to get all of such a mess arranged. But regardless of when or where they were taken or any such specific details, she had kept them all because each had meant something to her… each telling their own momentary story. Because the many pictures were simply gathered together in an empty cookie tin bin, the busy now single mother didn't have all of the time to take a stroll down memory lane whenever she pleased, and to be honest at this point she should have been doing just about anything else.

Actually, Angela had just finished packing a second of Shied's suitcases. It had taken her a full hour, and that whole time, Angela's mind drew nothing but a blank. It was as if she folded clothing and wedged in notebooks without a trace of a thought, as if in her sleep, in complete avoidance from having to think of anything. It was true though; in order for her to keep herself together in a somewhat stable state, Angela just had to literally stop thinking. Otherwise, if she began to think, she'd begin to notice. If she began to notice, she'd begin to see. If she began to see, she'd realize how empty Shied's small room was becoming, how the scattered papers which were there for seemingly years were now hidden within one of the various boxes, where the piles of neat clothing now lay concealed as luggage, how the baseball cards were lost within packed knapsacks, and how posters and drawings were taken off the bedroom walls, leaving nothing but the imprint of their light shadows for her to remember them by. And if Angela began to see all this, then she'd begin to feel. And if she'd begin to feel, there would be nothing but a lonely pain to overwhelm.

And that was what brought Angela to the pictures. They had remained within their living room tucked underneath a coffee table, pretty much untouched unless there were new photos to add to the collection. But still, to her, even though they had been there every day since, it only intrigued her to look at them today. That was only because she could not look at Shied's room, and now that she was done ensuring that all of his belongings were safe within his luggage, she could not look at those suitcases. There was an awful truth to them, a miserable aura that came to her when she thought of it, and so she didn't. Angela escaped to those pictures, those photos, to run away from the choking impressions she received from blank walls and curtain-less windows. She couldn't take it in there. She just couldn't. Or else her eyes would water, and her hands were shake, and she would wail in all of her self-pity. But Angela was a strong woman. She didn't do such feeble things, at least not anymore. She would fight this pain, even if it meant denying it, for as long as her weak little heart could bear. The blank room…. It was all as if a dream. She still heard his young laughter within it, and the soft beats of his music from his small portable stereo. She could still see the scattered clothing, hangers, dangling off doorknobs, curtains drawn for Casey's enjoyment, as a small breeze would blow in. She could still see these things. She could see them through the blur of the tears.

Day by day I find my way…
Look for the soul and the meaning...

The first picture - aged and forgotten, taken right at the turn of the 90s. She had been only 22, with her waist-long sandy blonde hair and a pale smile, gazing at the camera with uncertainty. It had been a painful uncertainty at the time, captured by the eerie lighting within the photograph, the way Angela's eyes had glazed over at the moment with thoughts and panic riding her life. It was back then when she had first started to piece her existence together. She had moved to Aimsa by the time she turned 19, with not much hope for any sort of a future, until the Birthright community of Japan had taken her in after discovering her very recent struggles with parental loss, high school dropouts, and abortion. At the age of twenty, Angela had become highly active with her Catholic church, and had decided that the young woman would now spend her life trying to compensate her mistakes. Managing to find her own apartment and to hold a steady job at Liquidation World, she had also taken on the role of countless volunteer hours at the Aimsa Children's Hospital, working with sick or injured children to a near to daily basis, as if taking them in as her own. Angela had felt as if it were the only thing she could possibly do to make up for abandoning her own child - by seeing that child's valuable spirit within every young girl and boy she encountered who needed her support and attention, by giving the only thing she could - love.

Then you look at me…
And I always see…
What I have been searching for…

Then the series of children pictures began to follow, photos taken only a year ago, during the Aimsa Children's Hospital fundraiser week. It had been a time when dozens of volunteers would come in, sometimes expert chess players or pet owners or cookie bakers to the helpful ordinary, bringing anything they thought would paste a smile on a child's face as a televised telethon brought camera crews in and out. She gazed at each picture intently, the newer photographs, more accurate and more detailed. They were abundant - dozens of snapshots of smiling children, some with casts, some with crutches, some with scars, yet nonetheless they smiled brightly each grasping onto a stuffed animal that Angela had given them. Their smiles were honest and true, and all that Angela had so lived to seeing. It was a feeling of gratefulness for them and also for her, a feeling of completion, where she could for once look at her life to have aided rather than to have destroyed. It made every sacrifice worth the efforts.

Then the photographs stopped moving. Her hands came to a pause in their shuffling, after having passed by smile after smile, one came to her immediate attention. Fighting to keep her frail hands from trembling, her breath could only fall short as she gazed at the crystal eyes watching her from the within the priceless photograph.

I'm lost as can be…
Then you look at me…
And I am not lost anymore.

Irises of sapphire blue, bangs of a wispy blonde, figure of a young boy with an expression of total innocence, curiousity and intrigue written upon his face. That was exactly what stared back at Angela, a picture handled and looked at many times before, but each time it was as if the picture were anew, as if she had never seen it prior to that moment when she'd hold it in her hand once again. It was a Polaroid, and somewhat dim, reminding Angela that she been meaning to get this picture enhanced when she could. Of all the images that had ever befallen her eyes throughout the course of her life, that picture, that one lone dim and blurred picture was the best of them all. It was everything to her, because it showed everything that was everything to her, in its most simple of ways. In a dim hospital room, a bit more than a year ago, it had been that very day when she had first met that young boy. In this photo, he cradled within his arms a gray, stuffed cat, plastic whiskers slightly frayed and eyes having lost their once brand-new luster, but yet he had liked it so much when she had shown it to him, that she had immediately allowed it to keep it. He had explained, in his inquisitive and polite yet timid voice, that they had no such thing where he was from. He had told her many things then about where he was from, and about how much it was different from where he was now. Although what he said seemed strange to her, she never questioned it, for in her eyes he was a child, and she knew he was a child of truth. It had been then, sitting there on his bedside, telling him about the hospital and how she helped out children, and listening to him tell her about many thing of his life, and about how she was so beautiful in the way that she looked just like his mother did. It had been a small inkling to her to ask about this child, to ask what everyone wondered about him, such as where he was from, where were his parents, and how he planned to return home. But he was a mystery child, and Angela had known that she could not just walk out of that door leaving him be as a mystery, an unsolved puzzle. For just sitting by him, talking with him, Angela was placing those pieces together. She saw the purity, the humanity behind this boy, and it reached out to her. It called to her like a child called to a mother, like melancholy called to comfort. It consumed everything else she thought about, but most of all, it gave Angela a meaning. This was a lost child, as she was a lost woman. It had been then that she had decided that, no matter the burdens or the hurdles to be leapt over, together, they would not be lost anymore.

People run, sun to sun…
Caught in their lives ever flowing…

Everything had been a hassle from day one. Angela was not normally the stronghold of anything; she didn't go about taking responsibility of things she didn't have to. Perhaps that was why she had dropped out of high school, or allowed her trash boyfriend to take advantage of her, or had neglected the responsibility of the child that she was to bear, or ran off to another country to escape everything that had gone wrong, but it had been that same day when all of those qualities filled with a dreaded fear to commitment or being deserted was set aside. It was a waking call to Angela, one that forced her to take a stand, to voice her own opinion, and to fight her own battle. She wouldn't get that boy, that blessed gift to her, without a struggle. But in her mind, for the first time focused in determination, she knew that this was something she wouldn't back down on. She knew the odds and the circumstances, and she knew she had what it took to beat it all. It was Angela's debt to society, to life, to herself, and to this lost child. And that was the way of mind Angela lived with since then; a lifestyle of designating priorities, of budgeting, of planning, of teaching and learning. She grew from a lost young lady to a woman in a matter of a day. Things kind of evolved from there, and the relationship, as expected, grew stronger. Though her apartment was not large, though her professions were not extraordinary, somehow, they got by. That young boy was no longer a stranger to her, nor was he a mystery. He was Shied to her, Shied Schezar. It was the only the two of them most of the time, as they went on their own little outings together, such as adopting Casey, visiting museums to Shied's interest, trekking through landmarks, and even little things like when they'd work together with Shied's projects or assignments. But it wasn't like he needed much help anyway, the boy was very clever, and he grew to like school rather easily. Shied had said that he preferred not to get particularly close to any of his classmates so that he wouldn't have to keep lying about his past to them, but Angela knew that the friendly boy had many friends there too. They liked Shied, because he took an interest in everything. If someone liked soccer, Shied would love to hear all about it, for he knew nothing of the game. If someone else liked a particular television show, he would get involved in the conversation as well, for Shied was new to everything. He held no judgments, like a tiny babe born to the world of the Mystic Moon. Frankly, Angela was quite convinced that Shied was beginning to take an interest in the young ladies as well, for he was already eleven, and besides that, Shied wasn't used to be able to associate with just any girl he pleased. On Gaea, he was obliged only to marry those with royal blood, and to associate only with females, in an affectionate manner, of particular high class. The freedom of the Mystic Moon and also its very realistic hardships intrigued the boy. He was the cleverest little thing she had ever seen.

Once begun, life goes till it's gone…
We have to go where it's going…

How did fourteen months pass so quickly? The snapping of her fingers would have seemed longer, in comparison to this blissful yet awfully short time. Who was she kidding herself, trying to deny what was to happen today? Why did she avoid it so desperately? Why was she running again? Why was she trying to escape, like she had when she was younger? Angela Ferentini was a strong woman now, was she not? She had even told him, young Shied, to pretend today as if it were any other. She had done so, and he had done so, for so long, but it was foolish! This day was not like any other! Shied's walls were bare, his belongings were packed… he was leaving.

She placed the photo down abruptly, ignoring the water build up within her eye ducts, trying not to think of it, escaping once again. Instead, she decided to think of something else but something relatively close - the thought of whom Shied would be leaving to. She had never mused over it much, because she didn't think it was a topic that needed much thinking. From what she knew of Shied's many stories about his parents on Gaea, she found them entirely credible people… but now, she decided to think about that a bit more. She didn't want to contemplate on the fact that her baby would be leaving her, and it hadn't hit home just yet. But she thought in advance to where'd he'd be going, to whom would take her place once he was gone. She couldn't say that she quite outclassed Shied's parents on that other planet, for his father was a prestige knight, and his foster mother was a princess for crying out loud, the direct sister of Shied's biological mother. It went without saying that Shied, being a young prince himself about to be crowned as Duke of an entire nation, was well off where he came from. She didn't have to worry about him not getting the proper education, or clothing or food. They could do a thousand times better at raising Shied financially than she could ever accomplish in a lifetime. But it wasn't that which Angela was concerned about. There was only thing that really came to bother her - did they love Shied as much as she did? Neither of them were Shied's first parents, and in a sense, nobody was Shied's "first parent". His real mother Marlene Aston had died when he was at such an early age, and he had been given to the Duke of Frade to be raised since his birth was an illegitimate one, and he could not be raised by Allen for that would most definitely scar his reputation. It was only until Allen Schezar be wedded Milerna Aston, did they ever even tell Shied about the fact that Allen was actually his biological father. Only then did they decide to take him into their custody, welcoming the young prince into an even more royal family, bounded by royal ties. No matter what way Angela looked at it, from each and every direction, the way things had came to be just didn't look loving at all. It almost seemed as if Shied were bounced around, juggled from family to family, as if at first he would be nothing but a political burden, but only until after the boy established a respectable standing in society, did they come to accept him again. It was as if his entering the Aston and Schezar relationship on the whim were like for political aid, as if Shied could always serve as a peace agreement between the nations of Frade and Asturia, which normally never had gotten along. What was Shied to them then? Just a pile of human contract? It was insulting to Angela, and though she knew that chances were that was very wrong on her theory about them not loving Shied, Angela still knew but one thing for certain: She'd always love him more.

And you say you see…
When you look at me…
The reason you love life so…
Though lost I have been…
I find love again…
And life just keeps on running…

"Mum?"

Her breath left her a second time, the water welling in her eyes returned. A thousand emotions surged through her at once, at a force she couldn't react to. Angela knew then that he had been watching her, observing her in his usual astounded silence. She knew then that as she had stared at him, he had been staring at her in return.

"Mum…" his voice was gentle; his raincoat zipped up halfway, sneakers lazily tied on, of which she would lecture him upon, baseball cap placed upon his head. He wore a smile, a forced smile. He was still pretending as if everything were just fine.

"I… I think it's time to go."

She watched him blankly, as if his words didn't register, as if his false positive attitude was one she couldn't believe. She could see right through her son in every way. He ached in the same way as she.

"Shied honey, stop pretending," She rushed the words, trying not to choke upon them, turning to face him as she struggled to see through the blur.

"What do you mean?" He cocked his head sideways, intuitive, trying so earnestly to hide such emotion, trying to make this day less painful than they all knew it reallly was.

She felt herself cringe. She hated sadness. She wanted to escape - but couldn't any longer.

"Honey baby, come here."

Shied did as he was told, wondering yet obedient, not questioning for he knew it was not a time for questions.

Angela's arms embraced Shied quickly, holding him close as any mother would, running her slim fingers through his hair, fine like silk, feeling his skin as smooth as an infant's, his warmth as soothing as with a loved one.

"I took a life a long time ago," she said it in a whisper, in shame of what she had done. "He was a very young boy, Shied. He was so very young," her tears began to fall, dripping downwards, slow and chilling, "And he was innocent just like you Shied. He would have been just a few years older than you now if I hadn't stolen that life away. But in every way, Shied, you are that life. You are my son, Shied, to me you are. But I can't deny it anymore… I can't deny that you're leaving me today."

The embrace grew tighter, tears falling more abundantly.

"But you're not denying anything," he began to argue, voice quivering yet strong. "You can't deny it because I am your son, Mum, I was meant to be your son and I always will be! I'll never leave you!! I am your son!"

His voice was strong, their embrace was soft, his words were touching, and her heart was touched. There was no reply, for there was no use for one. There was only but the sweet silence. Nothing more than a simple sweet silence abounding in love as they gazed at each other through the soft tears in their eyes, nothing more than a mother and her son.

You look at me and life comes from you.

* * *

A lecture.

It was unavoidable and entirely predictable, easily foreshadowed in everything that was everything. She felt she was much too old for lectures. She was twenty after all, and how many twenty-year-olds deal with such verbal abuse and ignorance from a biased and totally uninformed mother? She didn't exactly know the answer to that question, yet she did now that for the past twenty years, Hitomi had been undergoing nearly thousands of the repetitive annoyance of her mother's long and dreaded speeches on how one is to behave and act in life as if she were some omniscient deity to happen to know that much about what's right and what's wrong. A child may be a little more susceptible to such treatment, and even she bore the lectures with patience during her argumentative adolescent years, but now was different. Hitomi Kanzaki was a full-fledged adult now. She sustained her own self, paid her own debts, cooked her own food and slept under her own roof, so other than Hikoro Kanzaki having maternal rights over her, Hitomi found that her mother had no other level of authority either than that, but apparently, that feeling was anything but mutual Apparently, her mother felt that somehow, someway, she still controlled Hitomi's every breath and movement and her little daughter was nothing but a mislead and confused little soul. And also apparently, in this time of times where everything fortunate collapsed upon itself, a lecture was something that Hitomi only anticipated to harshly retaliate against.

Hikoro did not share her daughter's trait of a tall height, which Hitomi had obtained from Paul, her father. Although Hikoro's oriental blood kept her relatively shorter than her own daughter, the look of anger and frustration surpassed the limits of size. It had only taken her moments to arrive, the drive from her home to Hitomi's not being very long, but she knew that Hitomi would be prepared for her. Prepared in the sense that the young and mislead woman did nothing but sulk pitifully in a dining chair, avoiding eye contact with Hikoro to every possible extent. Although Yukari and Catherine were abounding with happy greetings towards her, and even though San - whom had accompanied Hikoro - was given a smile by the resentful Hitomi, it was as if there were a mute silence between Hitomi and herself. It seemed that all of the "words" that had been shared earlier on over the phone were quite enough in themselves.

"Hitomi," Hikoro sat herself on the adjacent chair, keeping her voice soft and placid, figuring it was the most she could do in order to get some sort of cooperation from her only child. Blinking softly, she gazed at Hitomi's hands. They were firmly clenched and tight, knuckles nearly white, stating that the girl hadn't fully recovered from their earlier dispute, and that within her resided an abounding anger towards Hikoro. Not only that, but each finger was as bare as the other. Apparently, Amano wasn't the only one who was ring-less.

Yukari bit her lip, giving a sigh as she escaped towards the kitchen. She had been watching the tense moment for quite some time, flashing Catherine unsure and tentative glances. They had both discussed, while Hitomi and Hikoro were on the phone earlier, that if worse came to worse and Mrs. Kanzaki would end up coming to pay them a visit, they would somehow try to retain a civilized manner between the two. They had failed to do that during the past little phone debate however, where Hitomi had nearly shrieked into the receiver in total infuriation at her own mother. Cathy and Yukari could only watch, wondering how the conversation had gotten so heated, to the point where in merely seconds Hitomi had slammed the phone so hard against the wall a permanent dent was left as a reminder. The phone itself lay in terrible shape, quite like the alarm radio a day earlier, as was the paled and unstable Hitomi, whom hadn't uttered a word to the two of her closest companions since then. It was apparent by the uncomfortable silence that her mother would be coming by - the least of the things that Hitomi would want to occur or need to occur - but it was anything but apparent as to what the two desperate friends would do about the ordeal.

"This is going all wrong," The young roommate sighed in complete exasperation, voice isolated from the hearing of Hikoro or Hitomi from within the kitchen, of which herself and Yukari had spent most of the morning mulling over what it was they should do. Cathy's voice sounded nothing but tired and worn out, feeling drained of energy at all that had happened and what would come to inescapably happen later on. She allowed her weight to collapse on the cool feel of the refrigerator, weaving her long braid continuously around her fingers as she did when she was anxious, that and cleaning, but her home now gave a gleaming sparkle and she figured relieving her stress wasn't worth having to buy five new cleansing agents all because she had used up the ones she currently had in this totally unrelated situation. But Cathy did understand that the true magnitude of this predicament wasn't really affecting her directly, yet it still somehow managed to consume both herself and Yukari, manifesting more problems as time went on.

"Care to inform me on what's going on, guys? I mean… like… "

San watched Catherine. San watched Yukari. They both looked horrid, or at least as horrid as one can look on an early weekend morning. San did admit that she too wasn't elaborately prepared for an outing at the moment, having been suddenly dragged along by her aunt-in-law, but she didn't seem nor feel as offset as these two girls looked to be. It was odd to her, not because she wasn't aware of the problem at hand (San wasn't that ignorant) but because just last night everything had been so blissfully perfect! Today had been their pre-planned girls day out! On the drive home with Catherine and Yukari, things had been so carefree and easygoing. It was a happy time, with weddings in the future and friendly family-filled gatherings on mind, but then somehow, someway, everything exploded in a frenzy of confusion and wandering angst over a period of one night! It seemed unimaginable to her, that something so faultless could go so awfully wrong in such a short amount of time. It was all as if a nightmare.

Yukari gave a faint smile towards Hitomi's tall and inquiring cousin, who always seemed so aloof. It was like she deflected everything bad and depressing and somehow managed to salvage a happy-go-lucky attitude that got the best of her at times. She brushed a straight strand of brown behind her ear, keeping her weight against the counter, taking a sideways glance out the kitchen door to where Hikoro and Hitomi still sat.

"You did hear the argument that they got into on the phone, didn't you San?"

"Well, not really," Hitomi's pondering cousin replied honestly, leaning her weight against the counter as well while playing with a spare sugar packet within her hand to keep up with distractions. "When I heard that Hikoro's tone was starting to get a little more serious and personal between the two, I went over to the washroom so it wouldn't look like I was eavesdropping or anything. But even then, I could still kind of hear her yelling. It was that bad, huh?"

Yukari could only smirk unhappily, recollecting it, giving a glance towards Catherine. Unlike San, the two of them hadn't decided to let Hitomi alone to argue with her mother over the telephone. They hadn't stopped Hitomi either, but had just kind of observed her trying to pick up on what the two Kanzaki women were arguing so furiously about. It had been no longer than five minutes, but those minutes were stressed and grueling.

"This is all because of last night," Cathy sighed, stating the obvious of what the three girls did know about the ordeal.

"So does Aunt Hikoro know everything about what happened between Hitomi and Amano? You were there when Hitomi and Amano got in the argument, right Cath?"

"No, not really," Catherine turned to face San. "When I had arrived, Amano was just on the way out and took his car keys from me after I drove you two home in his Bentley. I doubt Ms. Kanzaki knows exactly what happened last night, as we don't know anything much about it either. But I figure that's what she's here to find out."

"Let me warn you guys now," Yukari cut in from no where, hesitantly glancing out the doorway, spotting Hikoro trying to talk to her daughter while Hitomi remained stalk still and purposely inattentive. "I've known those two for an awful long time, and I know what they're like when they don't get along, and it is beyond ugly. The scary part is, this is probably the worst thing that could happen. Hitomi was finally starting to grow some trust in Ms. Kanzaki again. I mean, she had willingly decided to appoint her mother as Maid of Honor. I really thought they'd start getting along. This is really going to mess things up between them for the wedding."

"What wedding?" Cathy eyed Yukari doubtfully. "The way things are going, I don't know how likely it is that there will even be a wedding."

"But there's got to be!" Yukari's eyebrows furrowed in worry. She had been quite anxious about what was happening for quite some time, but a thought like the wedding being totally cancelled had never even crossed her mind. "This is Amano and Hitomi we're talking about here Catherine! I mean, it's not like they can just stop their friendship and go on with life. They've known each other for like -- forever. I don't think it'd be like either of them to call it off after all this time of planning."

"Maybe not," Catherine Corain only hesitantly agreed. "But they can easily postpone it at this rate. I mean, it's down to just three weeks Kari, down flat to the wire. I hate to say it, but if they're getting into these conflicts now, it's best they hold it off rather than marrying with resentments to each other."

Yukari bit her lip. She didn't like the tone of Catherine's words, the negativity towards Hitomi's and Amano's nearly "perfect" relationship as she saw it, but Cathy had a very direct point. Although Yukari felt that in her long life with Amano and Hitomi, things had always had a close-flowing rhythm and pattern, she had to admit that the occurrences of these problems threw that rhythm entirely offbeat. She wanted so desperately to think of it as a "forgive and forget" situation, where Amano would come crawling back to Hitomi or vice versa, but it just didn't seem likely. There was a strong and undeniable presence of mistrust between the two of them. It wasn't something that could be resolved very easily, never mind if in the matter of a few weeks, assuming that it would even be resolved.

"Hold on, let's back track here," San looked absolutely confused. The way Yukari and Catherine were talking of things made everything look so dreadful and horribly tied together, when just before everything had seemed so synchronized and flawless. "So you guys are saying that Aunt Hikoro and Hitomi don't actually get along?"

Yukari managed a faint smile, "They have been lately, which is probably why you presumed that they do get along, and I admit, it's been going great between the two of them this past year."

"Yeah, I was meaning to ask that," Catherine turned towards Yukari. "Hikoro's come by to visit Hitomi a few times, like when she and her bought Hitomi's wedding gown, and they got along just fine! But it wasn't always like that?"

"Never," the highlighted reddish brunette shook her head, quite confident in her answer. She felt that in the entire world and probably beyond that, she was one of the closest people to Hitomi, as Hitomi was one of the closest people to her. Yukari had always known that Hitomi had strived so earnestly to please her mother, but she had also known that Hitomi was always angered that Hikoro would set her standards so high, to a point that Hitomi just couldn't reach.

"Hitomi's always been alienated from Ms. Kanzaki," Yukari explained quite quietly, keeping her voice to a timid hush. "They're similar in many ways. I don't know if you know this, but a lot of Hitomi's psychic qualities actually came from Ms. Kanzaki's bloodline."

"Psychic qualities?" Catherine couldn't help but allow an eyebrow to rise.

"Yeah," San decided to explain, finally relieved that she would know something before someone else, for once. "Hitomi used to do a lot of fortune telling, and she was good at it too," San looked towards Yukari, "but wasn't it Hikoro that stopped her from doing it?"

"Um hum, in a way," Hitomi's best friend nodded. "Hito kind of personally gave it up too, but her mother was still really strict on it after Hitomi's disappearance and return in and around tenth grade. Hito's held a sort of separation towards her mother ever since her father died. When Ms. Kanzaki had lied to Hitomi for several months about her father's move to Seattle, instead of just telling her that her father didn't make it, Hitomi just had that burdened in her heart for years. Hikoro should have definitely told her the truth."

"But that would have crushed her! She was only like ten at the time," San argued defensively, recalling her own mother's tears towards the death of her Uncle Paul.

"I know it would have, as it would have equally hurt Hikoro to say such a thing, but it'd be the same for any of us. I'd rather deal with the pain when it comes, instead of having someone else twist the truth only to let me know about it later on. But after Hitomi had gone through the disappearance, or the Time, she just never acted the same way again towards her mom. I guess it was the psychiatric sessions that really ticked her off; I would be pretty angry too if my mom took me out of school thinking I was crazy. That was rock bottom of their relationship for sure, and lately it's only been uphill from there. But I don't know about now…"

Catherine Corain nodded, feeling the big picture coming slowly into sharp focus after having been blurred for such a long time. She was starting to see how incredibly fragile all of these relationships actually were. Funny, that at the first introduction to these various characters and all of their dramatic situations, everything just seems so right! Hitomi seems like the pleasant young woman - considerate, calm and sensible. And then there was Amano, being the perfect gentlemen, with high status in society, apparently a family man… Yukari, the perfect best friend…Hikoro, the providing mother of encouragement and support… it had seemed that way for an awful long time but all along there was an unsightly truth behind it all that only a select few actually knew about. There was Hitomi's estranged past, Hikoro's love bordered by conditions, Amano's close-mindedness to his fiancée's mentality and even Yukari's attraction to her best friend's to-be-wed husband. It was much more cluttered and entangled than Catherine could ever conceive, but as Hitomi and Hikoro sat only a few feet away, she had a feeling that there was no choice but for it to all unravel now.

* * *

"I'm still sorry that I couldn't get to prepare you guys any kinda decent dinner," a young Angela sighed, after having prodded a fork into a tiny excuse of a baked potato. It was totally undercooked in her opinion, and she felt entirely hesitant to eat in this nearly empty place, occupied by one unmindful waitress filing her nails off by the counter, and muffled 80's music constantly interrupted by static in an old diner right off the freeway, neon lights flickering and surrounded by a web of entangled moths. "But by the time I could get anything respectable cooked, I'm afraid we'd be running off schedule."

"Are you kidding?" A young cat-lady, long lengths of ears hidden by volumes of cherry-pink hair, only gazed at her from across the table, mouth agape in surprise, setting aside the salt and pepper shaker she had previously been amused with. "I truly adore your cooking there, Ms. Ferentini, I really do! But I gotta say I'm glad to have gotten to eat at this place. Their fries are delicious! Just like yours… but wetter."

Van smiled softly staring sideways at his companion, who constantly gazed out of the large restaurant windows where dusk had immediately started to settle. The stop by the diner on the way to the base had been totally unplanned, but with Merle and Shied's stomach grumbles, Angela didn't think a little detour could hurt for one last treat. Before Merle laid the usual half-eaten mounds of food, as Merle, like any cat, was a terribly finicky eater, instead finding more interest in napkin holders or paper place mats with meal advertisements. She had already taken eons longer than the rest of them to select a meal from the menu, having hurried only to Van's reminder that they were eating on a tight schedule. However, the fish sticks as well as the fries were finally long gone, having satisfied the girl's picky yet vast appetite for Mystic Moon fast food.

"Wetter?" Angela Ferentini let out a bright laugh, along with Shied who sat alongside on the opposite side of the table, trying not to join in too much to keep from sputtering the coke he was presently drinking out his nose, grinning and shaking his head.

Merle perked up a bit at Angela's ringing chuckle, quite relieved to hear sign of happiness within the four since they had left the Ferentini residence about an hour and a half ago, embodied in this intimidating realm of seriousness. Merle wasn't a child, she understood that there were some times that didn't involve jokes or grins, but she didn't want to see this day being one of them. It had been tense enough as it was, and very busy too with countless checks and rechecks to see that everything was accomplished and accounted for, so she felt it was only natural if not necessary to have some light-hearted times to let loose, rather than always having to be plagued with worries of what was to come or what would be forgotten. However, she still felt somewhat confused, eyeing a slab of charbroiled beef on Van's plate, practically oozing in a translucent puddle.

"I don't get it, what's so funny? I mean… it's kinda soaked to me." She wiggled her feline nose, allowing the alluring scent of Van's meal waft towards her - steak, fried rice and macaroni casserole. As appealing as it smelt, the meat still looked as if it were a sponge.

"Oh Merle, you are so incredibly darling," Angela smiled finally settling in from her amusement, lying back on the faded cushion of the couch-like dining bench. "Don't get me wrong, it's just that I'm not so used to people asking such cute questions, since Shied here likes to pretend he knows more than I do."

"Hah," Shied scoffed jokingly, dabbing his mouth with a clean napkin in an act of overacted prestige. "Well, I bet you didn't read four issues of the Britannica encyclopedia in under two weeks, now did you?"

"Well, I dun think I have to to know what the wet stuff is that Merle is referring to," Angela replied snottily back to her beloved son, yet with a secret smile and a teasing ring to her voice, as they had usually joked when things felt more laid back. Merle was right on the fact that these times were most definitely tense - emotional. So all the more, Angela was grateful for this sudden moment of ease. She turned back to Merle pointing at the "puddle" on Van's plate, in which the meat seemingly floated upon. "It's grease honey. Always happens in places like these. Don't want to get too much of that in ya, it adds quite nicely to the calories."

"I see…" Merle nodded smiling, yet still totally aloof as to what 'grease' actually was or what purpose it served, or what on earth 'calories' were supposed to be. But she liked the food, whether it was fatty or not, or swimming in unidentifiable liquids. Back at the hotel, she had loved being exposed to the fast food that Van would bring back to her, and the home-cooked style that Angela had occasionally stirred up for them when her and Shied would visit, but it was different to her, much different to be out and eating food in a totally new environment eating from a totally different menu, and a whole other part of town. It was fairly empty, which was a good thing although Merle's "human disguise" was pretty effective in hiding her less human features, but sometimes she wished that there were more people, for Merle always loved to observe the citizens of this world, as she had been doing often from the view of the hotel balcony. It was hard to believe that she wouldn't be seeing the world, this world, from that view anymore, from seven floors high, or skyscrapers stretching to the clouds, or traffic jams in the winding streets for a long length of time that she couldn't quite predict. On that balcony or in front of that mystical "television", it almost felt as if Merle was sitting stock-still in a glimpse of the near future of Gaea. It now felt as if she had blinked for just a moment, and that glimpse was long gone.

"You're happy here, aren't you?" Surprisingly, Van joined into the conversation, sipping quietly on a glass of water and observing Merle as she continued to watch a car slither by on the fast lanes on the opposite side of the window far ahead. All of them had had a sense of silence this day, one that was abnormal from their usual upbeat attitudes together, but it seemed that Merle still held an enthusiasm to the world, as if she was winning the struggle to retain a happiness even if there was to be an inevitable sadness soon to come. He wasn't surprised at all. Knowing Merle, when all was down, she'd be the last one left still looking upwards.

"Happy?" Merle suddenly stared to Van, stared at him intently nearly thrilled to hear his voice so willingly speak. She had been nervous, as the others, to begin conversation with him, for he was so very secret now. He had been secret ever since last night.

"Of course I'm happy!" She suddenly exclaimed the words, trying not to think of her suspicion towards him, trying not to think of the whys and the what's and the where's behind her thoughts towards him, behind the wound he bore, behind the hostility he so sullenly showed. Instead, she put those things aside, for she was not going to be caught prisoner in this global state of depression. Instead, content with the food she had eaten and the opportunity of being with those she cared for, she looped her arm around Van's and lay her head upon his shoulder, shutting her eyes and blocking all negative thoughts out. There wasn't anything negative with her Van.

"I'm happy Van. I'm finally out here, with you. I'm happy."

Van nearly choked on what should have been a harmless substance - water - in total surprise to Merle's sudden decision of affection. He shakily clanged the glass back down upon the table surface, finally catching his breath as he felt the sudden warm presence of her cheek upon his shoulder, eyes rested closed and furry hand resting on his forearm. His handsome dark eyes, hidden behind bangs of hair, black bags underneath after having lacked sleep from both emotional and physical pain, lit in a sudden familiarization to Merle's unconditional care towards him. She had given so much effort the night before; having watched over him from a distance, her feline eyes worried yet his voice was mute. He loved her so, his ineffable best friend, but his mind was yet so troubled, and his heart so wrenched, that he didn't want her sympathy - or anyone else's for that matter. He had thought that such treatment towards her would make her less interested in him, would make her cold towards his own distantness, would eventually come to result on her giving up in his bitter personality. It wasn't that he desired such a thing, but because he felt he couldn't act any happier, and words just couldn't escape him to explain on his behalf. And so, that was what credited to his sudden surprise that Merle still bore the same expression of fondness, a possibly even more loving expression, despite the way he had treated the lot of them. It made him realize his ungrateful attitude towards his friends, which tore him so inside.

"Ain't that just cute…" Angela let out a soft admiring sigh, watching the two with a subtle smile as she stirred her coffee softly. She allowed her eyes to drift also to Shied, who smiled in return to see Van's sudden involvement with the three of them. It was hard enough to stir up conversation as it was, but it was even more difficult to say anything addressed to the king of Fanelia. Van spoke of course when it was necessary or polite, as to compliment Angela for the bounteous meal she had cooked that morning, or simply apologizing for all the trouble he had caused at the Ramada and so forth after giving a very brief explanation of the mysterious occurrences, which still lay beyond shadows. He sure wasn't behaving the way the young gentleman usually did, and almost always looked as if he were suffering from some sort of physical bother, but still everyone kept their distance, everyone but the one person who couldn't - Merle.

"Don't you think they make such a cute couple?" Angela hushed over to Shied quietly, just out of the mentioned two's earshot, smiling and winking a tad bit.

"Ah, Mum, don't start up with that again," Shied groaned chidingly, recalling their debate on the topic about a week ago. "I already explained to you - it's never going to happen between those two. They're practically brother and sister for crying out loud! Muum, that's gross!"

Angela let out a quiet laugh, having predicted such a response from her son. She loved to think of him that way - her son - as she had been so fondly doing so after their moment together right before they had departed to their venture to the 'base'.

"Well, I think you're only defending those two because you have a little crush on Merle yourself, now don't you?"

Shied nearly came close to spitting out a mouthful of shish kebob, giving his mother a roll-of-the-eye glare. "Mother, please! She's four Earth years older than me, I can't believe you'd even think it."

"Ha," Angela brushed it off. "You won't even notice the age difference after a few years."

"Mother, no."

"Oh c'mon…"

"Uh unh."

"You know you like-"

Then suddenly Angela was abruptly interrupted.

One of the most momentous statements was suddenly stated for the night, to lead to one of the most tumultuous conversations to be spoken, when all strain was to be revealed:

"Will you miss this place, Lord Van?"

It was a simple question, not so very intricate or problematic, but yet it came entirely unexpected and unprepared for. That one phrase, all alone in its innocent self, became the key to a strange door left unopened. It burdened an immediate silence upon them all, in the quick sense that smiles were stolen off faces, sounds muted from being voiced, with the exception of the neon buzz and the crackling radio, all was quiet and taut in an unyielding suspense.

Van felt his chest tighten once more, once again surprised by Merle's abrupt decisions, yet this time he wasn't so certain for whether it was astonishment for the better or for the worse. He felt his voice caught all over again, unable to escape with words that couldn't come to exist, for he barely had a clue on what to think. It was a simple question, one that may have been more easy to answer just a few days ago without a mere backtrack in thought, but now, it almost felt as if she were prying into things he didn't want her to know, for he was secret now. But with the way she had addressed him the way he missed, and the way she treated him with kindness in the way that he had missed from the old times, he knew that just like the old times, he had to let go of secrets.

"There are plenty of things to miss Merle… this… this is a great place to be."

Merle nodded in agreement, feeling Van's arm become rigid - he still wasn't ready to speak so freely just yet, but Merle could not bear to wait. She hated it. She hated how she was left in the dark, how she couldn't understand him, how it wasn't as easy to read it usually was. Sure, it was true that Merle didn't act this "close" to him anymore, sure it was true that she had purposely decided to simply call him by his first name and omit all fancy-shmancy titles, but it wasn't true that those things were signs that she was denying her care for him, and now she fought to make that evident. She did care for him; so much so that it tore her very soul to have seen him last night, suffering in numerous counts of pain, yet keeping it all to an uncooperative silence that she couldn't penetrate yet couldn't live with. She couldn't bear watching him tear himself apart inside. She couldn't stand to watch him live in secret, and thus, she would continue to be persistent.

"What will you miss most?"

Angela swallowed, and drank down her coffee uncomfortably. Keeping her eyes locked onto the paper cup it was within. She was observant of the situation yet remained out of it, feeling it was awkward enough without her need to make it even less stable. She couldn't exactly understand what Merle's intentions were with such little, if any, consideration to Van Fanel's privacy, but she could only hope that it wouldn't increase any emotional tension already existing between the four.

Van sighed, pulling up the collars of the long, knee-length trench coat he hadn't worn in a long while, ever since back in March… ever since that night. He ruffled a hand into his hair, refusing to answer right away and sighing instead with distaste. He wanted to signify to his friend that it wasn't the time for such things to be answered, but he had a strong feeling that she was already aware of his discomfort in being straightforward, which was why she targeted the sensitive subject so intensely.

"There are plenty of things to miss. I don't know what I'll miss most. Can we get on with this?"

Merle lifted her head softly, conscious now that Van was not willing to cooperate as she had hoped. But there was a drive in her, an unanswered calling, and she was not going to leave this world until there were no more doubts to linger like a bad odour. She couldn't stand the thought of prolonging either a depressive mood towards their departure, or a synthetic happiness that thus added to depression. She wanted all to be known, so that each feeling that was felt was genuine and mutual and natural.

"No Van," she said the words kindly, yet directly, hoping that they'd be strong-willed enough so that they wouldn't be easily dismissed. She could see the two spectators watching in uneasiness from across the table, feeling a little guilty for having to involve them in her intimidating demands of the most difficult character of the group, but she had no other choice. She knew that they wanted to know exactly what was up with Van just as much as she did.

"Tell me Van," she looked to him directly, unblinking of course, since her feline blood allowed her to blink much less than regular humans. He returned the glare, although with a bit of resent in his beautiful claret eyes, possibly feeling a bit disgraced or embarrassed or even exposed.

"Tell us please what we've been patient to find out - Van, just tell us what happened last night." Her plea, her demand, was blunt and straightforward and directly to the point. She had phrased it in the only way she knew that he wouldn't be able to writhe out of so easily. It was rude - yes, but she felt it her need all the same.

Van let out a sharp exhale; knowing her request would be coming but liking it no better. He shrugged off her hand immediately, feeling suddenly at odds with her, as if disturbed that she would disregard what he wanted to keep for himself, her feeling as if it was something that she had the right to make public - which of course she had no such right, no matter how good of friends they were. Or at least that's what he currently believed.

"Merle that's quite enough," His demand was blunt and straightforward and directly to the point - tone matching hers in every which way - cut and dry. The strain that was already so tedious became even harder to bear as tension increased. "We already discussed what happened last night. I talked to the four of you about it, isn't that right Shied?"

Shied looked upwards suddenly, surprised to have been so suddenly brought into the conversation nearly dropping his fork, but managing to catch it in time. He had been discreetly studying what was going on between his two comrades, yet it was like watching a movie and being the audience, never expecting to actually be dragged into the ongoing action. He couldn't help but wonder if it was Van's efforts to try and get all of the attention off his shoulders.

"Yes, uh, I do remember most of what you said. You mentioned that there was an incident that happened at the Ramada and uh.. you uh.. got hurt," if it were hot enough, beads of sweat would have started to build upon Shied's soft forehead for he felt anxious all over, trying to fill in the blanks from the little that Van had told them the night before. He knew that him and his Mum were just as clueless and as curious as to what exactly had happened to Van as Merle was, so he couldn't quite securely stand for Van's defense. "… then… um... that woman, the detective woman, helped bring you back to my place after you guys left the hospital…"

"Yep, that's all you told us," Angela helped out the frazzled Shied, confirming with a solid tone that Van hadn't told them of very much at all. She didn't expect to find herself fighting for Van's secretive cause so much, for her instincts told her that something important had occurred the night before, and Van was disrespecting them all by keeping it entirely to himself. Moreover, he was insulting the trust that Merle had so faithfully rooted in him by ignoring her needs the way he did.

"That's all you need to know." Van declared hastily, striving to keep his tone from growing bitter, and avidly avoiding eye contact. He didn't want to appear too resentful, but it was as difficult a task as like a worm trying to be appreciative to the science student that so openly dissects it.

"No, not really," Merle was just as flat to the point as Van was, not trying to avoid eye contact with him, but more so trying to gain it. He was looking for every wormhole in order to slip out of this situation for whatever reason, but she wasn't as apt to letting it all drop as he was.

"How about this detective woman," she began her further inspection despite his evident glare of aversion. "What was her name again…? Kusanagi wasn't it? Kusanagi Motoko?"

Van didn't answer, grunting instead, yet only sat and waited for Merle to evidently continue.

"I'm pretty sure that's her name, we did get to talk with her for a few minutes when she dropped you off at Angela's door. She seemed nice. Was she, Lord Van?"

The place was quiet once again, yet the neon lights still buzzed, and the faded sound of the radio was off on commercial, and every now and then you could hear the distinct humming of the one waitress, now mopping up the other half of the restaurant, where one other customer made small talk with her. It might have been a placid little evening out to eat, had things not turned so rapidly sour, and had not every silent moment felt like an agonizing and torturous pause in the mêlée for truth and confidentiality.

Van rubbed his palm against his cheek, exasperated with all of Merle's nosy antics, feeling a surge to just scream out and demand of her to give it all up - it wouldn't get anywhere. He was frustrated by Merle, frustrated that her suspicion had just become so intent so suddenly, frustrated that she would take their last few moments together as comrades and allies and friends to warp everything against him, as if it were so important to let the entire world know exactly what he thought or felt. He was frustrated. He was sore. He was sore. All over, Van could still feel a fatigue, a pain that just as suddenly could come to be excruciating, his left leg being tender and swollen, his back feeling cramped and stiff. He didn't know what to think as he was already so consumed by just about everything else. There were so many things to think about, yet barely any of them involved his physical problems. There were so many things that ran adrift through his active thoughts: the idea of tonight. It was something that had came to him so frequently since the days had passed from their arrival, the thought of their inevitable departure at some time, in some day. But yet, although he felt cluttered and strained and disbelieving to what was fact and what was fiction, truth had it that today, and now, was that time he had so thought of, and at times, even dreaded. In nothing but a few hours, or even less, Van would no longer see the strange technology of this foreign world, or taste the exotic foods of this populated lands, be exposed to the extreme culture of a faraway place, or just be anywhere remotely close to the magical land of the Mystic Moon, of the Earth, as he had grown accustomed to calling it. That thought, that thought of utter separation plagued him so, to the point where he only felt sore in one place - at heart.

"She was nice," Finally Van, sullenly and almost even regrettably, complied with Merle's bold demand for an answer, which she apparently didn't feel like backing off of. "Of course that Motoko woman was nice; she wouldn't have driven me all the way to Angela's home if not."
"I got to talk to her for a little bit," Angela suddenly decided to join in conversation, sensing a remote yet growing leniency Van was starting to have towards his secrecy becoming revealed. As the eldest of the group, and the only one who actually was a resident of the Mystic Moon, she felt that it was no harm for her to know at least the basics of what went on with the people that she had so willingly looked after for the last couple of days - considering it would be the last day the were to be with her. But Angela didn't think about that too often, there was no reason to pursue an even heavier depression - just yet.

"She told me a bit about her job, what she does," Angela continued, staring at Van softly, hoping that he wouldn't retaliate on the fact that all of them had questions they wished for him to answer. "She told me she met you at the hospital, on a case investigating that incident that occurred there."
"That's true," Van nodded, still somewhat ungrateful to their prying concern towards him, yet feeling that he had no right to turn away the curiousity of Angela, just because of all that she had done for all of them in their short stay. He didn't feel it necessary to explain exactly everything that had happened, but he understood that he probably should be a little more detailed than he had been the night before.

"But I don't get it," Merle continued to eye him intently. He was starting to break down now, gradually. Although she hated burying into business that wasn't her own, she knew just as well as everyone else that this was the only opportunity that remaining three of them could get a better glimpse at just what the truth was. Maybe Van was right - maybe they didn't have to know any more than they already did, but the fact of the matter was that Van was evidently injured - something everyone had easily noticed upon his return with the limping and fatigue he so obviously showed. Another fact was that he had been in a hospital, therefore he had been treated for those injuries with some sort of foreign alien medicines of this world, and also he had been involved with people - like the detective - in issues that no one asides from Van really understood. Moreover, after Merle and Shied had tried to visit Hitomi the night earlier, upon returning to the Ramada to drop Merle off, it was only a miracle that she had managed to find their luggage and escape off with Shied and Angela to stay overnight with them, seeing as the hotel was alive and buzzing with some sort of controversy about the incident that Van so kept undisclosed.

"What don't you understand, Merle?" Angela looked towards their feline companion, of course sporting a visor and windbreaker to make her seem anything but feline, feeling that there were only a million things that they all didn't understand, yet she too wanted to edge things on so that maybe it will all come to be understood a bit better.

"If that lady was so busy investigating this so called 'incident', then how or why would she have had time to meet you, Van?"

Van stared towards Merle taking a heave of a breath - he was beginning to grow quite agitated of explaining himself with patience cutting short.

"Merle, it was becau-"

"And just how is it that you got injured anyway? You were pretty sketchy on the details."

"That's right Van, I'm concerned about that as well," Angela quickly quipped in, putting on a motherly expression and not trying to be too intimidating. She didn't want to force the truth out of him, he was an adult after all and should know what is best for himself, but considering the man had gone to a hospital for crying out loud, she could only wonder if his health would come to backfire on him, or all of them.

"I think we all are," Shied decided to express his opinion. After all, it wasn't difficult to see Van silently grimace from his left leg, which all knew was heavily bandaged underneath his leg pant. It didn't take any sort of genius to know that that was a serious wound, and Van yet hid a serious secret.

"I had told you already," Van glared at all of them, laying his hands on the table flexing his fingers to fists. "There had been an accident at the Ramada."

"Yes," Merle nodded, recalling all of the hubbub she had encountered at the front of the hotel. "But you never told us what kind of accident, and how exactly you got yourself involved and injured!"

"Van," Angela joined in, staring at him solemnly, "If it's okay with you, would mind telling us how you got hurt? We care for you… that's why we want to know."

The young king looked towards her, looked towards that gentle woman whom had so become like a friend to him, nurturing them all and becoming a mentor of sorts. When he stared at her beautiful face, dusty blonde ringlets and gentle azure eyes with an expression of genuine distress, he saw a motherly figure that she was, becoming the mother to all three of them, which they all had never really had. When his eyes came upon Shied, who was the closest to the kind Angela, he saw this earnest young man, probably more clever than he was, who stood proud with equal nobility to that of his father. And when Van looked to Merle, the most unique of them all but yet the most familiar, he could feel her honey eyes tug at his heartstrings, her compassionate expression relaxing his tension, her undeniable youthful curiousity still burning alive within the adult she now was. It was so evident as he sat there while they all focused so intently on him, that they did care, enough so that they wouldn't let matters slip them by, enough so that they wouldn't cease to persist even upon his hesitance. They cared for him, and although he didn't know how ready he was just yet, he knew he had to show some gratitude.

"There was almost an accident," Van quietly began, hustling out the words to avoid slight pauses, watching his companions light up in satisfaction to hear him speak, as he ran a nervous hand through his raven hair. He didn't know just what it was he should say, and then again, he also didn't know what it was he shouldn't say, but he would as well try to spit out something.

"It happened on Fifth Ave," he decided to begin with the basics.

"Right at the front of the hotel," he figured the location wouldn't hurt.

"I could hear some sort of commotion outside -- it had all happened so quickly," he slowed down the playback of yesterday's events to capture the detail.

"There was this red car, it was so loud, it roared past us at a faster speed than all the other vehicles," he recalled the reckless automobile.

"And a few seconds after it passed, then there was this..."

Suddenly he paused. He felt his throat catch - it had just begun. He had only begun to retell the story, when already he felt a strong inkling to lie, to avoid the truth, to keep it only for himself and one other. Van longed only to skip out on this one detail, yet without it, the story could make no sense and would only leave reason to their suspicion. Besides, with his friends' eyes glowering with concern, with his heart fond of nobility and respect, he could do no such thing as lie. But what was he to do?

"There was this woman," Van said it hurriedly. He was not apt to the idea of being any more specific than that. He figured, depending on his tone of voice, his friends might just come to believe it was just any general Earthling woman, and wouldn't catch on to how much deeper the situation ensued.

"… She was crossing the street at the wrong time," Van continued to rush out the words. He didn't want to give himself a moment's rest to think it all through, or thus his voice would become rigged with emotion.

"There was this big thing, some kind of cargo vehicle which is called a 'truck' here I suppose, and it was… out of control to say the least. I'm not too sure why, but she passed out right there in the middle of the street."

"Oh my God," Angela's eyes were agape and wide. Honestly, that mental image that Van was so vividly painting was not at all as she assumed. In her mind of logic, she had figured that Van possibly ran into some disagreeable persons, possibly even gang members, whom he had gotten into a fight with, and eventually the detective had come to intervene. After all, neither Van or the detective were clear on what had occurred the night before, so a thousand scenarios had come to mind. But now, Angela could see that this 'incident' had involved a life other than Van's.

"What on earth happened?"

"Well, it would have been inevitable if no one had done anything," Van remarked darkly, feeling still disgusted as he had recalled it. There were so many of them. There had been so many spectators, fit and middle-aged people just as he was, just standing by and uselessly observing fate unravel. 'How cowardly,' he thought ashamed of such a people, selfish slobs of beings that had no heart of courage as he so proudly invoked. There was only one thing that bothered him so, plagued Van so -- the reality that would have occurred had Van not been there, had he not have had that strange vision only moments before, had he not had such a premonition of critical warning:

"That woman would have died." It was a horrid thing for Van to imagine, and thus he didn't. He would never want to picture something so grotesque. He would never come to know something so heart breaking had such a fate instead been chosen.

"But I was there," Van continued to explain, yet it was also an assurance to him, a permission to dismiss that horrid thought, for he had been the one to prevent it. "So I had to do something."

Merle let out a breath. Laying her chin upon her clenched fingers, she studied Van's expression closely. By looking at him, and knowing within how his wounds hurt him so, yet feeling the intensity of the tale he told, she felt it overwhelming -- admiration. Sure, of course the thought that her dearest Van -- no matter how many skirmishes they got into as she grew older and more independent, he would always be her 'dearest' -- merely inches close to an image of bravado yet also fatality raced her heart so, by him just sitting where he was she knew he had overcome it. Her dearest Van was the person she would always admire most and overall, a hero to her -- but not just her -- to many.

"You saved this woman didn't you?"

"I had to," Van nodded, feeling not a moment's hesitance. He was confident in those words, for at the time when it had occurred, since then and up until now, Van had felt as if had no other choice. Of course it had been dangerous, life-threatening, and would reveal his alien identity to the hundreds of eyes that were peeled on to each of his movements, but despite the downsides, his options were heavily outweighed -- he was going to save her, he did save her, and to him that was the only possible outcome that he would have been able to live with. There would have been no other way.

"But you got hurt?" Angela looked to him worriedly, recalling his bandaged leg. "That must have been so painful! And that woman too?"

"Of course she wasn't hurt!" Van argued defensively, then realizing what he had just done, he softened his tone. He was beginning to show emotion. He was making it evident that Van had put himself to injury before that woman could even get a scar, and with his concerned tone, it showed that he had cared for her, more than what was expected. He couldn't risk such information becoming too known.

"She wasn't hurt," Van repeated, softer this time. "But I guess when I finally picked her up, I couldn't run away fast enough. A part of the truck hit my left leg, and so I was wounded pretty badly, but hey, it could have been much worse than that. "

"Wow, Van," Shied stared to him. "You're right: it would have been much worse for you and that lady had you not had so much bravery at the right time. You sure are one hell of a courageous hero."

"Shied's right," Angela smiled to Van brightly. She had always known that Van was an honourable and well-worthy man with his upbringing of his once extinguished city as its youthful leader, but she didn't know just the extent that Van's nobility stretched past that of politics. "You did that all for a stranger Van, and were even humble enough to not boast it to us, hell we had to pry it out of you. It's a pity you couldn't stay long enough to receive some recognition. Did that detective say anything about you getting any honourable mention, awards even, for what you've done?"

A tint of red tickled over Van's face. It was strange to him the way his companions interpreted yesterday's events, as if he was a superhero of sorts for doing what he did. In a sense, Van had been heroic, but that was most definitely not the focus of all that had seen his heroic actions. Of course, Van knew that by the way he had described things, he had made it sound like Van had actually been on the ground when he had saved that woman, and had just dodged in front of the truck seconds before impact and lifted her off the ground. He had deliberately avoided the topic of his wings, because at the mention of them, Merle would definitely know he was hiding something more.

"She didn't say anything like that," Van answered truthfully, remembering nothing but negative attention, no where remotely close to being honoured with rewards or such. The only such publicity he could imagine receiving is the honour of being poked and prodded by Mystic Moon scientists taking feather samples and blood samples, with all the witnesses labelling him as a flying freak of sorts. "I don't need that kind of attention."

"That's my Van of course -- always the humble hero," Merle hushed softly, once again linking her arm around his and resting her head softly upon his shoulder. She was getting accustomed to doing so, this act of fondness she had never gotten to do in so long. Van had never had time for such a thing, to sit and chat and smile at Merle's affections and she didn't expect him to have that kind of time. He was a king, and a busy king at that. Van was not the type to have servants run around and do his tidings for him when he could do it himself, yet another one of Van's unselfish qualities.

The young Fanel merely smiled in return, patting Merle's soft pink hair, tied back in a loose ponytail while concealing her long ears. He thought it sweet that she would hold him so, calling him a "humble hero" as she had said. Van did consider his best pride to be rooted in humility, yet his secrecy of the topic of his actions was not due to a denial of pride. Had circumstances been exactly as he had described -- the woman being a stranger, his saving her having been entirely by foot -- then Van would have told them about it the day earlier, and Detective Motoko probably would have mentioned it and given him some sort of recognition or gift. But the way things had really played out was much supernatural than everyone wanted to accept, and much more intimate than Van wanted to share. It's not that he enjoyed keeping the entire truth from those he cared about, but at this point, he wanted to keep his heart for himself.

"I'm so glad that you and that woman came out okay," Angela declared with relief, feeling at ease to the somewhat happy ending despite Van's wounds. "But did you get to speak to her? Was she alright?"

"Just for a little while, yes," He answered truthfully, yet not so specifically. "But soon after the authorities were called and I… well I had to be attended to at a hospital they told me. After a while, Detective Motoko decided to give me a lift home, and since I couldn't return to the hotel without risking the revelation of my identity, I had a feeling coming to your home would be the next best choice."

"It was a good choice Van," Angela smiled, agreeing, patting his hand assumingly from across the table. "And thank you for telling us what happened. You had nothing to be ashamed of."

"Mum's right," Shied looked to him, while sipping up the remains of his cola. "If citizens of Gaea got wind of that, just imagine how many honorary medals you'd receive!"

"Hah," Van smirked, knowing that had the whole thing occurred on Gaea, it wouldn't have seemed so unusual. Many of the Fanelian people were entirely aware of Van's demi-Draconian features. "I don't think I'd want anymore. Speaking of our homeland, it's getting quite dark out there. I think it's just about time we get going."

"Oh that's right," Angela gazed anxiously out into the night, where the darkness had begun to settle. Looking towards her analog watch, she spotted the hands lying upon the six and the eight. "Six-forty already? Wow. It sure is difficult to drive in these rural parts of town once dusk fully sets, barely any streetlights out there. I'll just go freshen up for a second, and we can get going."

"I need to go wash off too," Shied stated, staring at his shiny fingers coated from the cooking oil. "These foods are greasy."

"Sure, we'll wait up for you in here," Van agreed, watching both Shied and Angela disappear off down a corner to the restaurant's grimy bathrooms, passing a courteous smile to the one waitress. He felt a bit contented now, stomach satisfied with a good moment's rest from the long drive, and the guilt so involved in confidentiality partly lifted off his back. Of course, his leg still bothered him and he hated the idea of having to waltz around in an apparent limp, but he was grateful that he could at least walk. Next to that, his back itched like madness, and his mouth was eerily dry. His mouth had been dry the entire day with sweat building upon his palms as if there had been a transfer of body fluids, but he still decided to ignore it. After all, Van wanted to be cool-headed about the whole ordeal, the whole thought that all in all, these few moments were the last. he'd see in this strange place. Sure, so the young king hadn't claimed residence on the Mystic Moon for very long, but there was something strong about his short stay that constantly rang at the back of his mind. There was something... more to it rather than just a short vacation from royal duties, something stranger. Of course, taking everything into account, just being on the Mystic Moon was strange, considering the odd and in no other way to be described, "magical", way of coming to the world and returning, and discovering an intelligent life form so different from the ones of his home. So his coming here was without debate, a phenomena of sorts, as well as a temporary tourist-like relaxation from a normally rigorous life, but yet it was more. There was something... more.

Then he noticed two yellow beads staring intently at him. It kind of took him by surprise, to hear her strange words:

"I saw them Van."

He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, spotting her sitting so close to him and watching his every movement, feeling his every breath. He wondered what was up with Merle, as if her attitude had so suddenly changed, no longer light-hearted or playful but now seeming a bit too intent, too focused on him, as if she had awaited this exact moment of their being alone to bring about the change. He wasn't fond of when Merle would be so demandingly curious as she now acted, for like cats, she did not blink when she was absolutely fine-tuned with something, thus Van couldn't help but find her two wide yellow specs with a fine black slit down the centre only a tad bit intimidating.

"Saw what, Merle?" He swallowed down some water, trying to act casual, trying to keep his cool, pretending not to get the hint that Merle knew something he knew, but wouldn't tell and hoped she didn't know. He licked his lips, as he did when he felt under a strange pressure.

Merle, still unblinking, motioned her hand towards his upper back, cocking her head sideways as if to subliminally say "I know."

"When you were re-applying your bandages to your side," she began to explain, blinking once, and then softening with a more compassionate expression. She lay her hand upon his arm. "I saw the two marks on your back, Lord Van. You have two large rashes, a deep red. They must have hurt."

"Well hell yeah," Van agreed casually, cool-like, still in his realm of 'pretending' that he didn't know what they both knew. Van gulped down the rest of his water, before finally thinking up a lame excuse for the very apparent markings on his backside. "Getting hit by a truck means taking quite a painful pounding you know."

"I'm sure it would," Merle sighed in reply, wondering as to why he just wouldn't be straightforward with her. They were alone after all, and Merle was dropping just about all the hints she could drop concerning the fact that Van was not hiding what he wanted to hide very well at all -- at least not from the young cat woman. She had suspected it from the start of all the mayhem, but upon seeing the rashes upon his back late last night, she knew right then that what she had suspected had been confirmed. And now with Van's story about this supposed "mystery woman" and a daring rescue as such, it was just like icing on a cake.

"I'm sure it would hurt, Van. But the thing is, the part of the truck hit your leg, not your back."

"And I suppose you would know?!" Van clanged his glass back down on the table, for reason of impatience and also hope that his sudden harsh reaction would have Merle back off the topic before she got too much into it. But to his misfortune, Merle didn't even flinch.

"Van, obviously I know. If you had been hit on your back, you would be dead."

He looked to her. His eyes were fiery with a warning, as if a loud sign that he beckoned her to dig no further, yet Van knew he was easily defeated. Even if he were to raise his tone and yell at her to stop prying into his business, he knew that was treatment Merle didn't deserve. She was showing how good of a friend she was by knowing so far ahead before he spoke, and how clever she come to become. She was also the stubborn type now, much more than when she was younger. She wouldn't always do things because Van asked, but would do things only if it was to his benefit. In this, he knew that Merle thought it better for him to just get everything out in the open, otherwise she wouldn't have bothered to persist even despite his annoyance.

"You only get those kind of markings for one reason and one reason only," Merle decided to continue at Van's silence signifying his lack of defense. "You didn't even touch the ground when you saved that woman, did you?"

He stared toward her with eyes glimmering of burgundy and maroon, with a sigh so soft in total bewilderment as to what to say. Should he have been so surprised that Merle would be acute enough to pick up on every detail and piece things together to form what could only be the truth? She was always first to know anything and everything about him, as it was vice versa, so Van should only come to accept her partake on even his intimate life.

"Van," Merle spoke again, wondering as to what Van was quietly thinking. "You used your wings, didn't you?"

He looked away from her, and rested his back upon the sofa-bench on which they sat. He didn't see the use in trying to concoct some sort of escape from her prying eye, for the issue was far past denial.

"Yes, Merle, I used the wings to save her. It was the only possible way."

Merle nodded, with a glimpse of a smile, "I had thought so. I thought, 'Van must have used his wings, he always uses either them or Escaflowne when he's that brave'. But then, you can always use Escaflowne, but you can't always use your wings."

"What do you mean by that?" he eyed her strangely, though fully aware of what Merle meant. "They're my wings, I can use them as I please."

"Maybe so," Merle only partially agreed. "But after you don't use them for so long, it takes something special to give you that ability to release them again."

"I'd say that woman's life being endangered was a pretty special circumstance, don't you think?"

"Well, then, to be more specific, it takes someone special for you to release those wings and have done what you did."

There was an odd silence. Van's mouth was part open, part ready to form a speech of argument, but out came nothing. He couldn't think of an alibi, a reason to escape the specifics, to avoid the inevitable. As he stared at her, Merle the triumphant, he knew Van was backed well into a corner that he couldn't as well run from. Thus, he didn't persuade Merle any further, for he knew that she was ready to move in for the kill:

"It was her, wasn't it?"

Van paused. Merle paused. There was nothing but a dead silence, each awaiting the confirmation or denial that would come to follow. Van looked to Merle, Merle looked to Van. It was at a complete deadlock.

"Okay guys, I got the bill paid up at the front, ready to get going?" In the intensity of the moment, the two had barely noticed Shied and Angela's return, fetching on their spring jackets entirely unaware as to what they had just butted into.

"Yeah, it seems we're barely on schedule here. Guess Dryden's gonna have to put up with us being a little late," Shied commented, walking up ahead with his Mum, who reminded him to quickly zip up his coat as they approached the exit of the restaurant.

Van got up quickly to follow, finding a sudden path to a temporary escape, until suddenly he was physically held still.

He looked down, and saw her cute and smiling face, honey eyes with beautiful long lashes and the most adorable button black nose, framed innocently with a soft cherry-pink, hugging him tightly as she had when she was young, catching Van off guard in a soft embrace. He didn't know what to say, mouth poised in words, body rigid, so surprised by her show of affection despite his own stubbornness to answer what she had wanted so much to know, or more so, for him to tell. But even as his words came to be voiced, as he finally decided that it was now or never for a quick confession, Van was adequately interrupted.

"Quiet Van," She hushed playfully, smiling. "I'm proud of Van. I love you Van, and I'm so happy for you. I'm so happy that you got to be with Hitomi for even just that little time."

Her words hit like bullets, that name fierce like the piercing of a sword, yet soft as an inkling to his heart and a skip of heartbeat. There was the truth. There was that truth he had hidden, so easily and quickly expressed in her own simple matter. Merle had always been like that, summing up exactly what Van felt from complicated to ingeniously simple, showing him just what he couldn't see .Van should have been happy, like Merle was for him, that even that time -- short as it was -- was still his to experience and allow his memories to indulge upon. He should merely be happy and incredibly grateful that for that short yet meaningful fragment of his life, a love could not deny had been in his arms, her whisper in his ear, her emerald eyes in his view, her mahogany hair at his gentle touch... her lips upon his, just for that simple, sweet time.

He swallowed quietly, and closed his eye before a tear began to well. He realized then that hey had gotten what they had come for, Van's happiness in his love for that dearest woman, Merle's happiness in Van's.

"I'm so happy for you," she quietly repeated.

Van could return her embrace, thinking of only one thing to say in return:.

"So am I Merle, so am I."

To Be Continued…

Remember, this is not the full chapter… look out for more coming soon ;-)

Author's Notes:

Okay, I *know* I'm not supposed to leave any author's notes to leave you in suspense over what will come to happen in this long twist of dramatic events that is WWMA, but I did want to mention an apology for being absent for so long. Fanart has become my number one aspiration at the moment, and if you'd like to see my progressions, here is my gallery:

http://www.mediaminer.org/fanart/agal.php?id=38574

However, producing this type of work left me to make choices, and one of them was to delay the progress of this fanfiction in order to pursue fanart, especially since FF.net has been down lately. But with the site's return, you can expect mine as well, and the upcoming finale to this fanfiction. Yes, I know this chapter is long and bound to get longer, only b/c all the details have to be in before the next and FINAL chapter, which is one I don't think any of you will expect (and for those who know, don't spoil it! lol) and so this chapter is critical in getting in all the vitals. For those who mentioned that the story is kind of winding down unnecessary paths, trust me that is not of my intent. Everything written in this chapter is in coherence with past chapters to help explain exactly what had occurred. Basically, this is an "answer all the open questions" chapter, so yes, it does get a bit tedious to soak through, but it's the finishing touches so to say to problems from before. Of course, there are bigger problems ensuing, such as the departure and the hanging-on-the-balance wedding, but the story doesn't end there....

Thank you all again for your support. You're wonderful! Oh yes, and please be aware that in a few weeks I WILL change my alias to "Kaliko Rosa", my new name, so search results for Lovely Videl will not turn up. I'll probably finish this story with the LV alias though, since we've all kind of gotten used to it ^__^

Take care, and thanks so much for reading :-)

Kaliko Rosa