Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ In The Shadows, In The Light ❯ 13 Fallout ( Chapter 26 )

Author's Notes: All Weiss Kreutz stuff/characters are not owned by me and all rights apply to the lucky bastards who do own them. I make absolutely nothing off this except gratification of my own sick and twisted desires.

 

Thanks goes to my beta on this. It's greatly appreciated. I'd also like to thank the friend who answered my medical questions. Much love for that, babe.

 

~ indicates character POV

** indicates internal conversation.

 

 

13 Fallout

 

~Ken~

 

No one said anything during the ride back to the shop. I'm sure team Schwartz was worried about Schuldig; a nicked lung wasn't something you could walk off in a day or so. There was also that weird phone call that Crawford got just before we left the hospital. I wasn't his number one fan but even I could tell whoever it had been on the other end of that call seriously shook him up. Crawford hadn't even looked that worried when he saw the knife sticking out of Mastermind's chest. I was dying to ask what the call was about `cause I figured it probably had something to do with Weiss as well, but we weren't exactly best buddies. After everything that happened on the mission, I didn't feel like getting my head snapped off for not minding my own fucking business.

 

Crawford disappeared into the TV room that was serving as team Schwartz's bedroom as soon as we walked in the door. Nagi made a beeline for his laptop, checking out any news reports on our activity at the warehouse, I guess. Farfarello stared at the door to the TV room for several seconds before shrugging his shoulders and heading towards the kitchen. God knows what he was going to do in there. Play with the knives maybe.

 

“So, you think Schuldig is gonna be okay?” I asked Omi as we headed for the stairs.

 

“I don't know, Ken. A nicked lung could turn ugly pretty fast. If they get in there and stop the bleeding quickly and he rests a lot after surgery, I'd guess he'd be okay. I'm sure the doctor will tell us more once Schuldig's out of surgery and in recovery.” He paused, tipping his head and eyeing me like a curious puppy. “What's with the sudden interest in Schuldig's well being? I seem to recall not that long ago you wanted to kill him in the most painful way possible.”

 

“Yeah, well, Aya and Yohji seem really attached to the annoying fucker. On like… a really deep level, you know what I mean? I don't want anything bad to happen to Aya or Yohji and well… Schuldig dying on them would qualify as bad for them, I think. And he did save Yohji's life. You kinda gotta cut the guy a little slack for that. He's still an irritating asshole and I don't like him, but….”

 

Omi smiled at me. I think he got what I was saying. I followed him up the stairs, calling first dibs on the shower. I knew Omi would grab some clean clothes from Yohji's room for both Aya and Yohji while I was washing off the blood from Yohji, Schuldig and the unlucky bastard that'd got in my way when I was first leaving the warehouse. I doubted Schuldig would be allowed to leave the hospital for a while yet so he wouldn't exactly be in need of clean clothes. Bet when he woke up in one of those hospital gowns that always left your ass hanging out he was going to fling a hissy fit. The guy was as bad a clotheshorse as Yohji and I could totally see him squawking over being less than fashionable in a hospital gown. I snickered when I thought of that as I stepped under the hot spray. I wondered if I'd have enough time to take Schuldig's picture decked out like that before he tried to fry my brain. Might be worth the future blackmail material to give it a go.

 

By the time I was done with my shower and dressed in clean clothes, I could smell something with cinnamon in it baking in the oven and wafting that delicious scent up the stairs. I followed my nose to the kitchen and found everybody seated at the table except for Farfarello, who leaned a hip against the kitchen counter and had a pair of oven mitts on his hands. He was wearing the frilly apron again and my mind derailed slightly at the picture of Farfarello in the apron playing Holly Homemaker while the clothes under the apron were dark with drying blood. There was even a smear of blood across one cheek, looking a little like war paint, and upping the creepiness factor on an already creepy guy. I wasn't too sure I wanted to eat anything he'd made while still covered in the blood and gore of whoever he'd caught at the warehouse.

 

But, the cinnamon whatever's smelled really good and supper had been a lifetime ago. My stomach rumbled and I blushed a little at Omi's snicker. I managed to talk myself into trying what Farfarello made when I noticed that his shirt was balled up on the floor in a corner of the kitchen and it looked like his arms had been scrubbed clean past the elbows. He was wearing an apron so that had to help protect whatever he'd made from random gorification, didn't it? I pulled out a chair and sat down to wait with the rest of the group.

 

“There've been some reports of sudden psychic events on several forums and blogs dealing with the supernatural that I monitor. Most seem legitimate and have occurred at roughly the same time that Schuldig had his… episode. I've compared the areas that the legitimate reports are centered in and I feel confident with a conservative estimate of a five mile radius from the shop,” Nagi said barely looking up from his laptop.

 

Crawford tapped his bottom lip thoughtfully and stared off into space. Something about what Nagi said must have set wheels turning in his head `cause he didn't even look at the plate of cinnamon rolls Farfarello put on the table with a little flourish. My mouth watered at the heavenly smell, but I waited for Omi and Nagi to each take a roll, watching them as they took their first bites. When it didn't seem like they were in danger of dying, I snagged a roll for myself, barely managing to hold back the moan of delight at the taste. It still blew my mind that Farfarello could cook like a pro. Since team Schwartz had come to say with us, we'd never eaten so good.

 

“Uh, not that I don't appreciate fresh baked goods but why are we eating cinnamon rolls at…” I checked my watch, “three forty-eight in the morning instead of heading back to the hospital to check on our team mates?” I asked around a mouthful of said cinnamon roll. I eyed the plate and wondered if I could snag another before I finished the first one without looking like a pig. If everybody had one, there'd be one left over for whoever managed to grab it first.

 

“Balinese is being kept over-night for observation. Schuldig is in surgery and we likely won't be able to see him for several hours. Abyssinian won't go anywhere with both his lovers in the hospital. All things considered, we have a little time before we need to get back there and a few things to discuss. Farfarello always cooks something after a successful mission,” Crawford said in a reasonable voice as he reached for a roll.

 

I snorted and shot a disbelieving look at Crawford. “Successful? I'd hate to see one of your mission failures.”

 

“The mission was completed as ordered. We have the information we were sent to get. The warehouse was destroyed with the munitions inside. We all escaped without being caught by the authorities. This would seem to be a successful mission to me,” Farfarello said before plucking a roll from the plate.

 

I shook my head. “We almost lost all three of them, in case you hadn't noticed. Hell, Schuldig still might clock out. We don't know how bad he really is.” Having three team members nearly bite the big one was hardly what I'd call a solid win. I'd call it barely getting out with our balls intact. I guess the bad guys had different standards.

 

“What do we need to discuss, Crawford? We managed to change the outcome of your vision. Yohji is alive. We can keep trying to get Schwartz boosted like you say we need to. Isn't that enough?” Omi asked.

 

“It may have been before Schuldig did his little mental broadcast. Unfortunately, that has changed things and we need to deal with the fallout. I suppose I should have been prepared for something like this. Schuldig has an absolute gift for causing shit with maximum impact and minimal effort on his part.” Crawford said with a little grimace. “I'd go so far as to say that's his secondary Talent.”

 

“He said he didn't mean to do it,” Omi pointed out as he licked icing from his fingers and eyeballed the remaining cinnamon roll on the plate.

 

“He always says that and he always means to do it. Schuldig is an asshole,” Nagi said without looking up from his laptop.

 

I refused to let my eyes slide to the keyboard where the keys were pressing themselves with blinding speed. That still creeped me out to see it. At least I wasn't the only one who thought Schuldig was an asshole. Even his own team mates thought that. Kinda justified my dislike of the guy.

 

“What's this fallout and how deep is the shit we're gonna have to wade through?” I asked as I grabbed the last roll. Fuck it. If I looked like a pig, I looked like a pig. The rolls were damn good. “Good stuff,” I said to Farfarello as I toasted him with the roll.

 

Farfarello nodded and smiled at the compliment. He looked almost normal when he smiled in a non-psycho way and that, oddly enough, made me suddenly leery of him. The way the guy flipped between normal and psychopath was fucking unnerving as hell. But, he was a damn fine cook and after eating some of Yohji's kitchen creations, I was willing to put up with a little of the crawling-creepies to get some decent chow.

 

 

~Crawford~

 

I didn't want to share the information I'd been putting together on the effects of Schuldig's contact with Yohji for my team, but my hand was being forced by that phone call from Rosencrantz. We needed them, specifically Yohji, and I didn't think withholding information would go over well with Weiss in general. Not to mention that Schuldig was sure to blab to his lovers whatever I told my team. I sighed softly. Life had been much less complicated before Schuldig started sleeping with Aya and Yohji. Granted, his sleeping with them had provided us with a way of possibly breaking free of Esset's control, but that wasn't the point. God damned annoying, pain-in-the-ass telepath was forever complicating my nice, orderly life. Just once, I'd like for my visions to warn me of Schuldig's shit before it happened. I didn't think that was too much to ask.

 

“The phone call I got before we left the hospital was Rosencrantz. They're aware of the psychic spike and told me to have my team check into it. They gave us a week to find out what caused it and make a report on the effects. If we can't come up with something in a week, they'll send a team out to do the job and I probably don't need to tell you that they'll coming to find out why Schwarz didn't do what we'd been ordered to do.”

 

Ken swore around the roll in his mouth. Omi looked like he'd swallowed something vile. Nagi's mouth tightened but he kept working away on his laptop. Farfarello's fingers twitched and his poniard was in his hand between one blink and the next. None of us liked the idea of a team from Rosencrantz paying us a visit and Weiss only had the barest of ideas of who or, more accurately, what Rosencrantz might send out for us.

 

“With both Schuldig and Yohji hurt we're pretty boned, aren't we?” Ken asked.

 

“Maybe. Maybe not. I've been tracking the levels of power in my team since Schuldig first mentioned it to me. There's been a subtle increase in all of us that I think is due to the existing link we have with Schuldig. The little bit of extra energy that Schuldig can't use has to go somewhere and my theory is that it trickles down the link to me, Nagi and Farfarello. I've observed that Nagi can lift more for longer periods. Farfarello moves faster and has greater dexterity. I've been getting clearer visions. I'm fairly certain that your team is also enjoying some increased agility and dexterity just from being around Yohji, but since I don't have any known previous levels to compare with, that's just an educated guess on my part.”

 

“What about Schuldig? How has his level of power increased?” Omi asked as he turned big, sad blue eyes on Ken and the remaining half a cinnamon roll in Ken's hand. Ken grinned and stuffed the rest of the roll in his mouth, earning a sulky look.

 

“Schuldig's range pre-Yohji was approximately one mile unless he concentrated. In case you think that's not much, bear in mind that generally telepaths with significant power can read the minds of people within a five hundred yard radius. Schuldig had more than double that to start with and is the strongest Esset has seen to date. For his powers to jump as they have will make Esset very eager to get hold of not only Schuldig but Yohji as well. I don't think I need to tell you how bad of an idea that would be not only for Schuldig and Yohji, but the world in general. The episode that caused Rosencrantz to turn their gaze our way had a five mile radius according to Nagi. That's a huge, unprecedented increase and something I didn't think was possible. I'm positive there was something else involved that triggered that little incident, but Schuldig's not telling. I have Nagi checking a few things out.”

 

“You said we might not be screwed even with Schuldig in the hospital. What are we gonna do? Yohji can boost me and Omi on his own but you guys are shit outta luck. You planning on camping out in his room and have them…” Ken blushed, “You know… re-charge Yohji over and over so we get this boost thing clicking along with the trickle down effect you were talking about?”

 

I smirked when I thought of putting that idea before Schuldig. I had every confidence that he'd jump at the suggestion if I made it. Not even recovering from life saving surgery would slow down the telepath's raging libido. I was fairly certain Kudou would agree with the idea faster than I could blink. I wasn't so sure which way Fujimiya would go but I suspected he was the voice of reason between the two walking hormones that were his lovers.

 

“Not exactly, although I'm sure Schuldig would love that idea. Kudou would probably like it, too. I haven't worked out the finer points of getting everybody boosted, yet. How we do that will depend on what information I get out of Schuldig, Fujimiya and Kudou. There was something different about the link Schuldig used to reach us after he was stabbed that's been bothering me; it was Schuldig's mental signature but there was a strong, underlying current of something else. I need to speak with Fujimiya and Schuldig about it, assuming they'll actually tell me what I need to know regarding this. Even if they don't want to reveal what happened during the previous spike, they need to be made aware of this timeline we're now running against.”

 

“What are you going to tell Rosencrantz about the spike? You're going to have to give them something, aren't you?” Omi asked.

 

“I'll give them a wonderfully constructed story of half-truths and lies. Throw in some facts and figures and maybe even a bar graph or three to make it look like we've actually been investigating and send it off to them asking for more time to further analyze the data. I can bullshit with the best of them,” I said confidently, with my best glasses glinting smirk.

 

Omi stood, since no more cinnamon rolls were forthcoming. “We should really head back to the hospital. I'm sure Aya is anxious for clean clothes and you did say you wanted to talk to him. The sooner we get this started the better, right?”

 

I nodded and rose from my seat. I had things I needed to know and limited time to find out. It was a damn good thing that I dealt well with pressure. Ken snatched the keys from Omi and said he'd drive. Omi rolled his eyes but followed his team mate from the kitchen. Nagi closed his laptop and trailed after them. I reminded Farfarello to take off the apron and asked him to put on a clean shirt. I didn't even bother trying to get him to change his pants. After the night we'd had, I wasn't up for arguing with a mad-man at nearly four in the morning over his choice to stay in blood-soaked clothes.

 

 

~Aya~

 

I slouched in the chair watching Yohji sleep. I'd promised the nurse on duty that I'd wake Yohji up every hour just to get rid of her annoying cheer at such an ungodly time of the morning. I was much easier than I anticipated; a little mental nudging was all it took for me to prod Yohji into opening his eyes, earning me an irritated glare for disturbing his sleep. I could handle the dark looks. Yohji was alive. A little banged up, but alive.

 

I could hear Sasha faintly in my head. He sounded stoned to the gills and I had to suppress the urge to laugh at him. I still wasn't sure how I felt about being permanently in their heads; whatever shreds of privacy I'd had with the link we previously shared seemed to have been obliterated when fusion replaced the link. We hadn't had the chance to talk about that before leaving for the mission and when everything had gone from bad to nightmare there certainly hadn't been any time to address my privacy issues. Once I had a few minutes to think about how things had changed for me mentally, I'd panicked a little. Even as he was being prepped for surgery Sasha had caught my alarm and struggled to reassure me. I faintly heard him telling me in a slurred voice that I just needed to retreat to where my source was and I'd be alone there unless I invited them to join me. He fell mostly silent after that but I could still feel him mentally in a hazy sort of way.

 

This fusion did leave me with a warm feeling that I'd never be alone again. I wanted to explore my lover's heads but I it would be rude to do that while they were both out of commission. I let myself drift mentally over just their surface thoughts and smiled at the oddities I encountered.

 

Yohji's annoyance at Sasha for using the last of his special conditioner and then taking his favourite pillow.

 

Sasha's wriggle inducing pleasure from the foot rub I'd given him one night.

 

Both my lover's disbelief at my secret obsession for a certain daytime soap opera. I sighed softly. I was never going to hear the end of that one.

 

“Aya? We brought some clean clothes for you and Yohji. Any news on Schuldig yet?” Omi asked softly as he and Ken slipped into the room, followed by the rest of Schwartz.

 

“He's fuzzy headed and not making a whole lot of sense, but I don't know if that's because he's still in surgery and under the influence of the anaesthetic or if they're done and he's in recovery and coming down from whatever they initially pumped him full of. The nurses haven't informed me and I don't want to poke him and risk waking him if they're not finished operating on him.”

 

“You're in mental contact with Schuldig?” Crawford asked pushing himself to the front of the group.

 

Crap. I snapped my mouth shut and glared at Crawford. I must be more tired than I thought if I let my mouth run at the drop of a hat like that. Crawford stared at me, the muted light bouncing off the lens of his glasses and reinforcing the evil image he cultivated. He folded his arms and looked down his nose at me. I wanted to remain mulishly silent but I doubted Crawford would leave until I told him what he wanted to know. I didn't want Yohji disturbed any more than he had to be and I was almost positive that Crawford would just wait until I had to wake Yohji up again and ask him the question. The last thing I wanted was Crawford asking pointed questions to a concussed Yohji. I also wanted to change into clean clothes, the drying blood on mine making the fabric stiff and scratchy, but didn't want to leave Yohji alone for Crawford to pounce on. I wouldn't have put it past the bastard to wake Yohji up to get the answer from him if he didn't get it from me.

 

“Yes, but as I said, I can't really tell what kind of state he's in aside from higher than a kite,” I finally muttered, hating the idea that I'd given into Crawford.

 

The light of interest burned in Crawford's eyes and I could see questions forming in his head. I remembered too late that unconsciousness cut the link, and according to everything Crawford knew, I shouldn't be in contact with Sasha mentally. Sasha hadn't wanted Crawford to know about the fusion between us and I might have just blown it. Shit. My only excuse was that I was mentally exhausted from everything that'd happened as well as being awake for nearly twenty-four hours and lying about how good or bad Sasha was doing never even occurred to me. Hell, I still had one giant-sized headache from acting as a focus for Sasha and I was fighting sleep so I could wake Yohji up when I was supposed to. I was too tired and mentally wrung out to be trying to play mind games with Crawford.

 

“We have a huge problem hanging over our heads, Fujimiya, and I'm not going to candy coat how ugly this can turn. Rosencrantz contacted me before we left the hospital earlier. They know about the psychic spike and they've given us a week to find out what it was and if it'll benefit them in any way. If we can't do that, they're going to send out a team to find out what the fuck is going on. We're not nearly as strong as we need to be to deal with the kind of team they're going to send. I'm going to float a cock and bull story by them with just enough truth to keep them happy while asking for more time to check things out. I don't know if that'll work but it's our only option right now. We need to stall for time, the more the better. If Esset ever finds out how strong Schuldig has become and exactly how he got that way, they'll never stop looking for us.”

 

I scrubbed a hand over my face. We so didn't need this right now. There was no way in hell I was going to tell Crawford what we now shared because of some intense, kinky ass play. I'd die of embarrassment. I was also fairly certain that Sasha had a good reason for wanting to keep the information of our fusion away from Crawford. I trusted Sasha explicitly and if he felt that it would be in our best interest to keep our mouths shut, then I'd keep my mouth shut as much as I could.

 

“So what do we do now?” I asked with a sigh.

 

“We need to boost everybody as much as possible before the week is out, although I don't know how, since everything we've tried before didn't work. Not to mention the tiny fact that Schuldig is going to be recovering from surgery for some time. I'm open to any suggestions here; if you've got any ideas I'd be more than glad to hear them.” The American paused and added thoughtfully, “There's also the small matter that the `tone' Schuldig used when he called for us to come and pull you guys from the warehouse was a little different than normal. Care to explain that?”

 

I nibbled on my bottom lip. Crawford wasn't pulling any punches. I had to give him something or he'd be even more suspicious than he already was. Fuck. I wasn't sure how Sasha would react to Crawford knowing about that little trick of using me, but since I did know he didn't want to share the information about the fusion, it seemed the less dangerous of the two options. I gestured for everybody to get comfortable and launched into a brief description of how Sasha used me as a focus for his Talent. When I was done, Crawford was grinning broadly and Ken and Omi were staring at me like I'd grown another head.

 

“So, just to be sure I've understood what you've said, you offered Schuldig the use of your mind as a focal point for his Talent, increasing the strength and clarity of his power in order to reach us when he was too injured to concentrate properly.”

 

I nodded. “It was painful, I think because of his and Yohji's injuries and his admitted shaky grip on his control. I'm sure if Schuldig were in full command of his ability and not distracted by a knife plunged into his chest, he wouldn't have hurt me so much.” My sarcasm flowed right over Crawford.

 

“Schuldig hurt you? Son of a bitch,” growled Ken.

 

“Doesn't matter, Ken. It was a do or die situation. It wasn't intentional and I told him to do it,” I said dismissing Ken's outrage on my behalf.

 

“You think you could do that again?” Crawford asked with barely suppressed excitement, ignoring the by-play between me and Ken.

 

“Yes. I didn't have to do that much really. Schuldig did almost all the work although I do have a wicked headache now that won't go away. Why? What are you thinking?”

 

“That we might have a way of saving all our skins. If Schuldig can siphon Yohji's Talent and then pass it through you to each of us in turn, theoretically it'll work. That way, we'll each get a more or less concentrated dose instead of whatever overflows Schuldig's ability to absorb the energy being spread between the three of us. Nagi, I need you to check Esset's files for something similar to this focus thing. I'd be willing to bet my last dollar that Esset has fooled around with the idea at least once. Be a ghost though. I don't want to do anything that might make them suspicious or tip them off to what we're trying to do. If you get even the barest hint that somebody might know what you're checking out, crash and burn everything when you run. Leave no trace.”

 

Nagi nodded and glanced at Omi. “I'd like your help on this. I want someone running a cover for me independent of my actions. Can you do it?”

 

Omi's eyes sparkled with anticipation when he nodded at Nagi. He was obviously enjoying his time with Nagi and the discussions they had about computers and information retrieval. Most of us had the basics of computers but couldn't hack our way out of a paper bag. While Nagi was technically one of the enemies, I was glad for Omi that he finally had someone he could talk his kind of shop with and not have to worry about holding back on the darker side of things that he did as part of Weiss.

 

“We'll grab a cab and head back to the shop to start on this. You don't need all of us hanging around here and I think the sooner we get more information, the better prepared we'll be when the time comes. Keep us informed, guys,” Omi said dropping the bag of what I assumed was clothes next to the foot of Yohji's bed. He ushered Nagi out the door already sliding into computer geek speak as he started to question Nagi about the files they'd be breaking into.

 

“Farf and I are going to see if we can track down a doctor to find out if Schuldig is done surgery yet. We'll come back and let you know as soon as we find anything out,” Crawford said rising from his seat and steering Farfarfello from the room.

 

Ken looked a little lost for several seconds before he ran a hand through his hair and mumbled something to the effect of giving me some privacy to change and waiting with Crawford. He closed the door behind him softly and I tipped my head back, breathing out a sigh of relief. That hadn't been as bad as I'd thought it was going to be. As a group, we were in pretty sorry shape but at least we had a plan of sorts.

 

 

~Yohji~

 

I heard voices fading away but faked being asleep. The last thing I wanted to do at the moment was call attention to myself and have to talk to anyone besides Aya or Schuldig. My head was killing me and my side throbbed and felt tight where I'd been stitched up. I heard the door click shut and waited a few more minutes before daring to crack my eyes open.

 

“I take it you heard that last bit,” Aya said around a small yawn. He looked exhausted.

 

“Yeah. You think that idea of Crawford's will work?” I asked as I rubbed my eyes.

 

“It's about the only option we have.” Aya flicked a glance at the door and switched to mental communication. **Sasha didn't want Crawford to know about fusion. Play dumb if Crawford mentions it or asks us about it. **

 

**I kinda figured that, Ran. The knock to my head wasn't that hard. **

 

Aya snorted and rolled his eyes at me. He rose from his seat and touched my cheek gently. His hand shook the tiniest bit and I covered his hand with mine. **Schu's going to be fine. **

 

Aya nodded and kissed me lightly on the lips. He slipped out of my loose grip and picked up the bag of clothes Omi had brought for us. He headed for the small washroom and closed the door with a quiet click. I would have loved to crowd his head with reassurances but knew Aya enough to leave him alone to get his shit together. He'd climb into the bed with me if I asked and I could hold him while he worried himself sick over Schuldig. I was worried about Schuldig, too but not like Aya was. He was terrified of losing anyone and coming as close as we had tonight rattled him like nothing else had. He may have looked together to everybody else but I knew what was going on in his head. I'd still give him that little bit of privacy I knew he needed no matter how much I wanted to soothe him.

 

My mind turned to thoughts of Schuldig. I still couldn't believe he'd deliberately come between me and the guy trying to knife me. Fine, he hadn't planned to get stabbed but the fact was that he'd done it without any thought to his own safety. I knew he loved me but I didn't think Sasha knew; he was still dancing around that in his own head. I guess that's why I was so surprised that he'd put his life on the line like that for me. You didn't do shit like that unless you were really serious about a person. Like love and hearts and flowers and forever kind of serious. I wasn't really one to talk on the confronting of feelings front, but at least I was willing to entertain the idea that I could be falling for the egotistical German. I gave a gentle poke at the warm and fuzzy feeling of Schuldig in my head. I wanted to reassure myself that Schuldig really was going to be as okay as I'd told Aya and there was no better way I could think of checking on him than taking a little trip into his head.

 

I sighed and closed my eyes, focusing on Schuldig. Aya said he was still out of it and I couldn't help my little smile when I stepped into Schuldig's mind. I'd done enough recreational drugs over the years to recognize that he was seriously stoned out of his head on quality pharmaceuticals. Odd snippets of conversations floated past me. Images of things he'd seen and done flipped by like a picture book. I thought it was interesting and flattering that a good deal of those pictures were of me and Aya. It took me a bit to find him but when I did, my heart tripped over itself.

 

Schuldig looked like he had when that whole fusion thing had happened except this time, instead of looking like he'd won the lottery, he looked utterly lost. He sat on lush green grass beside a sparkling river. I was sure that even as stoned as he was, he knew I was in his head. I highly doubted even quality drugs would dull him mentally that much. I waited for him to look at me, at little puzzled when he kept his head down and didn't even glance at me. He plucked at wildflowers that surrounded him and turned hurt, confused eyes on me when I finally called his name.

 

“Why don't you trust me, Yohji? What do I have to do for you to trust me? What do I have to do for you to love me? I'll die for you to be safe. You know that now. Isn't that enough for you? I don't have anything else to give you but my life. Why isn't that enough? You didn't ask for anything from Ran to give him your love; you just did it. I don't understand. Why won't you love me? Why won't you let me in like you do Ran?”

 

My heart clenched, the pain in his voice feeling like a fist to the gut. I hadn't realized it hurt him that much to know that I loved Aya but hadn't said anything about how I felt about him aside from the fact that I was serious about him. This kind of thing sorta rammed home the fact that he was leagues above me on the whole mental thing if he could hide something like that from me all this time. Even if I was a beginner with this Talent crap, I was still an Empath and his lover. I should've picked up on this shit. He had to be on some kick-ass drugs if he was asking me stuff like this and letting me feel how… rejected he felt. He'd never let me feel these emotions from him if he was stone cold sober. He was gonna be pissed when he came down and realized what he'd said and let me feel. I had no doubts he'd remember this whole conversation exactly, either.

 

“I don't want your life, Sasha,” I sighed and dragged a hand through my hair. This wasn't what I intended to get into when I went searching for him. I just wanted to reassure myself that he really was going to be all right.

 

“Then I have nothing worth giving you. I'll never have your trust or your love. I didn't think it'd hurt this much,” he said in a soft voice filled with resignation. He dropped his gaze to the wildflowers again and the hurt that radiated off him made my stomach churn and my chest feel tight.

 

Aw crap. This was not the time to be having this kind of conversation with him. Or maybe it was. Sure, it was massively unfair to use the fact that the drugs were making him so very honest, but maybe I could get him to take even a cautious look at what he really felt for me. I don't know why I felt it was so important for him to say he loved me. I already knew he did. Was I playing some kinda mental game with myself and him by holding back what I felt until he said it first? Was I that insecure? Schuldig's head jerked up and he pinned me in place with a surprisingly clear look filled with disbelief.

 

“Ach, you're an idiot, Kudou Yohji. You already know how I feel about you and Ran. It's right there in the front of your mind, practically in neon letters ten feet high. A child could pick it out. So what if I haven't said the actual words to you? You know it,” Schuldig said with a puzzled frown.

 

I sat down abruptly beside Schuldig. I hadn't thought he could snag stuff from my head when he was baked out of his mind. Apparently, I thought wrong and I was reminded again of just how good he was mentally even with all those drugs flowing through him. I wondered what else he could flitch from my head so easily and worked not to squirm. There was no way in hell he'd have admitted to anything if he wasn't higher than a kite. It didn't make the statement any less true, but it knocked me for a loop. I hadn't expected Schuldig to admit to anything. I'd just wanted him to maybe think about how he might feel about me. He gave an exasperated sigh.

 

“Fine. You need me to say it? Okay. I love you, Yohji. I love Ran, too.”

 

I stared at Schuldig as pleasure curled in my belly. I felt something shift in my head and peace settled through me. Schuldig's eyes widened and I felt a slight, stumbling brush of him across my mind. He grabbed me to him and planted one hell of a kiss on my lips that made my toes curl, my head spin and my cock harden. Joy was the only way to describe the things I was feeling from Schuldig. His happiness was making me happy and I hugged him tight to me.

 

“I can't turn my back on you two for a minute, can I? For god's sake, Yohji, the man is still in surgery. Or recovery. I'm not sure which. The point is, you shouldn't be molesting him whether it's in his mind or not.”

 

The smile Schuldig turned on Aya was brilliant and smug. “Yohji loves me.”

 

Aya dragged a hand over his face and sighed. “You told him? He's going to be insufferable now.”

 

Aya knew I loved Schuldig? Was I that transparent? How long had he known that little nugget of information? He hadn't said shit to either one of us. I wasn't sure whether to be impressed or wary of Aya's restraint.

 

“Sasha said he loves you, too, Ran,” I offered.

 

Aya blushed with pleasure even as he grunted. “Of course he does. We're a package deal.”

 

Aya joined Schuldig and me on the grassy bank of the river. We sandwiched Schuldig between us, our arms around him holding him tight. I felt Schuldig flitting through my mind, the barrier to him gone with his admission that he loved me and my realization that I not only trusted him, but loved him in return. His delight at being allowed freely where he'd been denied before almost bordered on the smug.

 

Whatever was coming our way, I knew together, we'd be able to take it on.