Weiss Kreuz Fan Fiction ❯ Yohji's Bad Deal ❯ One-Shot

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

I in no way own the series Weiß Kreuz. It is owned by Takehito Koyasu, all rights belong to him.

Notes: Song fic… *looks around* Stop your groaning I can hear you… In addition, I'm dedicating this fic to Isachan because without her help this fic would have been lamer than this.

Yohji's Bad Deal

Yohji leaned over to the shorter pale man, "Oh please Koi go out with me just this once. You really need to loosen up, besides think of how much fun you could have by being with me." He gave Aya his sexiest smile. "I'll make it worth your while."

Aya let out a soft groan, "How many times Yohji have I told you no. I don't like clubs, in fact I loathe them with a passion. All those bodies pressing up around and against me. All sorts of women groping and fondling me, not to mention all the men that would be hitting on me." Aya growled as he looked at his playboy boyfriend.

Yohji smiled again, "That's part of the sex appeal, love, and you got it, so why not flaunt it?" He winked at the man who was currently trying to ignore him by reading a book. He lowered his voice before speaking once again aloud. "Come on Ran, we're all going. Chibi, Ken, and I, we all want you to join us." He looked over at his younger friends for support.

"Aya-kun, pleeaaaaaaaaase?" Omi asked as he ran over and looked at the crimson haired man with huge chibified, blue eyes. "We want you to come with us. Besides if you don't come with us… I'll… I'll cry!" Omi's eyes started to water as if on cue.

Ken looked over at his young lover then back at Aya. He, by now could almost replicate Aya's glare of death to near perfection as from having to see it from the red headed assassin one too many times. "Aya! Look at what you made Omi do! He's crying!" He ran over and wrapped his arms around the genki blonde boy. "Shhh… Omi don't cry… Aya's just a dick that never cares about any of us wanting to have fun with him. We should just leave him be. If he doesn't want to come then fine… we'll have a better time with out the ice princess anyway."

Aya rolled his eyes and was about to go back to reading his book when Yohji pulled it from his pale hands.

"Nuh uh, you're not touching another book until you agree to go with us tonight." Yohji said.

Ken looked up from his tender ministries of soothing his beloved koi and glanced over at Yohji. His eyes widened as he realized what the brunet had done. "Ano, Yohji, do you have a death wish or something. No one, and I mean no one gets away with touching one of Frosty's books."

Yohji peered at the soccer play and smirked, "He can't do a thing to me, now if it was his katana… then I'd be fearing for my life."

At that point in time, no one was paying attention to said red head. He sat there staring at the three men in sequential order, Omi, Ken and then lastly Yohji, who currently held his book outside of his reach. He didn't know whither he should be extremely angry with one of them or at all of them. He could be angry with Ken for all the names that were being thrown at him, or Omi for his water works display, which he found hard to ignore. On the other hand, he could be angry with his lover for touching his book in the first place. Finally, he opted just for them to stop bothering him period. He let sigh of long suffering, "Fine… I'll go…" he said softly.

Yohji and Ken stopped their arguing on who would be killed first by Aya and stared at him in surprise. Omi also turned to look.

"Nani?" Yohji asked in disbelief. "What did you say, koi?"

Aya growled at Yohji, "I said I'll go… but I'm telling you now, I'm going because you three are forcing me to, not because I want to."

All three men nodded their heads at the same time, eager to get ready so they could leave and go out to the new club that just opened up a few blocks down the road. The said club was supposed to be the hottest one around, full of karaoke machines, and even a wet bar where people could get drinks and be smashed before the sun rose. To, Yohji, that was a paradise, not the karaoke machines, but the bar full of alcohol, he was always eager for a chance to christen a new alcoholic beverage place with his, as he put it, sexy body.

The hours passed and after almost a thousand times of Yohji telling all three men to change into something more decent, they were soon on the road in Yohji's sporty seven vehicle. Ken and Omi sat in the back seat, bouncing around as if they had never been to a club before. Yelling at the top of their lungs and giving Aya who sat in front next to Yohji a killer headache, the hangover kind, before he could even start drinking and have one.

Pretty soon they were pulling into a parking space outside of the club, and with just a little bit of hassle all four men were walking inside.

Loud, throbbing music assaulted the assassins as they walked inside. Heavy smoke hung over the place like the fogs of London on a bad day. Aya briefly wished he had never told them that he would be willing to go.

A few hours went by, Aya was slowly loosening up as he sipped on a Midori Sour©. Yohji was on his third beer and Omi and Ken were slowly but surely becoming trashed off the many shots of Tequila, that their waitress kept bringing to them.

Finally, Yohji had enough of Aya sitting there idly drinking a child's drink. He slammed his hand on the table causing the two younger men to jump up startled. "That's it Ran, you and I are going to play a game."

A delicate red eyebrow rose up at the unexpectedness of his lover's exclamation. "Oh?"

Yohji nodded his head, "Yes we are."

Aya's head inclined as he accepted what his love had said. "What are we going to play then?"

Yohji's signaled the waitress over to him and whispered into her ear. Her eye's widened for a brief moment but went back to normal as Yohji slipped her two crisp one hundred dollar bills into her hand. She walked a way.

A moment passed and the waitress came back bearing two small shot glasses and a huge bottle of the best Vodka they had within the club.

Yohji smiled at the promptness at which she served them and waved his hand off when she was going to hand him the change back. "Keep it, a sexy lady like you deserves something nice to buy good stuff with." He winked at her then turned back to his lover. He turned serious on the red head. "Ok the name of the game is Quarters. Object of the game, is to get the quarter into the glass, if it makes it I have to take the shot. If it doesn't, you take the shot, same goes for me. Do you get it?"

Aya nodded his head.

"Alright I'll go first." With that, he took a quarter out of his pocket. This was his lucky quarter, one that he used every time he played a game and so far had never lost because of it. He bounced it onto the table and it hit the edge of the glass with a tingle. "Since I didn't make it I have to take the shot." He picked up the glass and shot it back. "Now it's your turn."

"Alright." Aya took the quarter from Yohji and did the same thing, this time unlike Yohji the quarter went inside the glass without a sound.

"Beginner's luck," Yohji commented as he downed the second glass.

The game continued for what seemed like hours. Occasionally, Yohji would make it into the glass, but those occasions were soon becoming few and far in between, as Aya was flawless in his accuracy of the game.

At one point in the game, Yohji looked up at his lover. "You've played this game before haven't you?" He asked his voice hinting slightly on the slurred side, telling Aya that Yohji was well on his way to getting drunk.

Aya just smirked at the brunet and the game went on.

Finally, Yohji stopped the game. "That's it…" He said standing up and wavering slightly. "I'm not playing anymore, you're cheating."

"I am not."

"Yes you are!"

Omi and Ken both looked up from their drinks. Their eyes clouded over with intoxication.

"No he wasn't," Omi hiccupped then giggled. "Aya-kun wasn't cheating at all. I was watching the whole time. He just has better front and end coordination than you…"

"That's hand and front coordination…" Ken said, lifting his hand to try to make his point.

Aya rolled his eyes, "You're both wrong it's hand and eye coordination."

Omi and Ken both shrugged then went back to drink.

"Fine then, two more rounds, this time if I win, you have to do what I want, and if you win, I get to do whatever you want." Yohji slurred.

Aya agreed to the terms and soon the two rounds were won. By Aya of course, and he chose the one thing no one would ever think of making Yohji do… sing karaoke, his song choice.

Yohji gaped at the song Aya chose for him to sing. "No way! There is NO way in hell I'm going to SING that song." Yohji shouted.

"Yes, you are. Remember the deal, you do what ever I want."

"Fine…" Yohji went over to the machines and grabbed the microphone. "Konnichiwa, minna-san! I'm the sexy Kudoh, Yohji!" Cheers and catcalls whistled through out the building. "I'll be singing tonight." He said once the noise had died down. "This was picked out by my boyfriend, so don't kill me if I do a shitty job."

The music started up and Yohji stood there the beat going through him. He lifted the microphone to his lips once again and sung the words out in cue. "I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love. Loves going to leave me!"

He started to sway to the music. "I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts." He unbuttoned the shirt he was wearing and pulled it off throwing it into the crowed at Aya, which his lover deftly caught.

Aya raised his eyebrow as he looked from his shirt to his lover. He couldn't believe that Yohji was actually singing the song he had chosen.

Meanwhile Yohji kept singing. "And I'm too sexy for Milan, too sexy for Milan, New York and Japan! I'm too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party, no way I'm disco dancing!" He started to do a little disco dance then shook his head and his hands at the crowd.

He struck a seductive pose for a few seconds then started to strut. "I'm a model, ya know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the cat walk." He did a quick turn and pranced back to the middle of the stage. " Yeah on the cat walk, on the cat walk yeah, I do my little turn on the cat walk." He turned and faced the audience once more. "I'm too sexy for my car, too sexy for my car, too sexy by far." He pointed out the window to his seven, which was in plain view of everyone. He walked over to one man wearing a nice looking cowboy hat and placed it on his head. "And I'm too sexy for my hat, too sexy for my hat, what ya think about that."

He paraded once more around the stage. "I'm a model, ya know what I mean and I do my little turn on the cat walk, yeah on the cat walk, On the cat walk yeah, I shake my little tush on the cat walk." Before he came to this line, he stopped right in front of his boyfriend and turned around again. He shook his ass a few inches from his lover's face. All Aya had to do was lean over a few inches and his nose and lips would be right on it. The howls and whistles that emanated from the clubbers didn't cause Yohji to flinch but Aya glared at everyone.

They turned their heads from the sight and a soft blush grew on Aya's face. I should get Yohji to sing this song more often, he thought to himself as he continued to watch Yohji's performance on the stage.

"Too sexy for my, too sexy for my, too sexy for my," Yohji sang his voice going low and seductive. "'Cause I'm a model, ya know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the cat walk." He got a predatory gleam in his eye and began to stalk towards his lover. "Yeah on the cat walk, yeah on the cat walk yeah." When he reached the red head, he grabbed him by his hands and dragged him up on stage, keeping him face forwards. He placed one hand on the man's slender hips, started to move his hand from side to side, and kept singing. "I shake my little tush on the cat walk."

Aya let out a soft growl and hissed out, "Kudoh… you're a dead man for this."

Whether Yohji heard him or not, no one knows but the brunet kept singing. "I'm too sexy for my cat, too sexy for my cat." He pointed at Aya and gave a little smirk, while his lover stood there growling at everyone. Finally, Yohji just pushed him off stage and sang the next line. "Poor pussy, poor pussy cat." He wasn't completely finished with the red head yet, though. "I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love, loves going to leave me!" He cried out, pointing at Aya who eventually sat down at the table.

Aya looked over at the two boys, too see if they had witnessed that humiliation and was relieved to find out that during some point in the song, both Ken and Omi had fallen asleep. Omi was sitting on Ken's lap and the two looked peaceful, in their drunken stupor. Aya let a rare smile fall on his face as he looked from them back to his lover who was currently finishing the song.

"And I'm too sexy for this song." Yohji sang with a flourish of indifference as he stumbled back over to his koi. For the most part, he ignored the applause along with the cries for an encore and looked Aya right in the eye. "There are you happy now?"

Aya just smirked, "It's time to go."

Yohji nodded and with the help of the bouncer had all three men in the car.

On the drive back Yohji glanced over at his bemused lover, "I hate you, you know." He slurred out. "Either you cheated during quarters or you've played it before." He accused him.

Aya smirked. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

The end!

Author's notes: *giggles* now THAT is something Yohji would probably do.

Yohji: *glares* I would do that?! I would never make a fool out of myself in front of the women, besides I HATE that song!

Schu: *laughing his ass off* that, is so Yohji, *shakes his tush* come on Yohji get on that catwalk and shake some bootay!

Yohji: *growls* bite me Schuldich!

Schu: *raises his eyebrow and rawrs* is that an offer Yotan? *winks*

Yohji: … *stalks off*

Anyway! I hoped you enjoyed that little humor fic, this is what happens to me when I listen to that song and say I should write a song fic out of it… plus with Isachan on the phone giving me some ideas for it. So, this is definitely dedicated to her! Hope you enjoyed it, love of my life *purrs*

Schu: Review this for her, so I don't have to come and force you to do it. We're going to bed now Ja!