X/1999 Fan Fiction ❯ Ten Reasons to Love Somebody ❯ Found ( Chapter 4 )

Disclaimer: If X/1999 were mine, I wouldn't have all those restraining orders from CLAMP…

 

Ten Reasons to Love Somebody

 

IV. Found

 

He sat beneath a marble veranda, but the afternoon sunlight leaked through the structure to shimmer over his soft, raven hair and illuminate his creamy complexion. As his eyes cast over the book that stole his attention, long eyelashes fluttered away like those of a porcelain doll. Subaru was a rare and beautiful sight, even within the lavish scenery of Clamp Academy.

 

Seishirou gazed at him beyond his own line of sight through a shikigami perched on a nearby oak. He found that this was becoming a growing hobby for him since the Sumeragi began regaining his strength. Each time he cast his eye over Subaru, he found himself more entranced by his prey.

 

Although he was no longer ill, Seishirou noted how loosely Subaru's jeans were fitting against his waist and how ashen his face remained. He no longer appeared to be so exhausted, but this was little progress, and Seishirou knew that he could lapse back into the state he found Subaru in a week ago. Not that it made any difference to him; Subaru had proven that he was just as fascinating when he was delirious and weak as he was when he had the strength to fight back.

 

Nevertheless, it was not Subaru's health that overshadowed his thoughts as he kept a close gaze over the Sumeragi but a growing wave of irritation. He was not the only one being captivated by the Sumeragi's grace.

 

Subaru unwittingly studied the textbook, and glanced uncertainly at violet eyes. “I'm sorry…but I don't think I can help you with any of this. I never learned it myself,” he confessed awkwardly.

 

Kamui propped his chin up and held back a look of disappointment. “That's alright, Subaru. You've taught me a lot already.”

 

“No I haven't,” he dissented. “That is, it seems that I've been the one learning from you, Kamui. I was your age when I quit school, and even before, I was barely around for any of the lessons. I wish I was of more use to you…”

 

“That's not true at all!” exclaimed Kamui. Noticing Subaru's surprised expression, he quieted his voice. “I mean, yes, maybe you can't always help me when I have statistics homework, but you're ahead of even Segawa in biology. And besides, Subaru…I enjoy your company more than anything.”

 

Subaru blinked, not quite understanding why Kamui's face had turned pink at that moment. “You enjoy my company?” He could not fathom why anyone would like to be around him. In fact, there had only been one person in his life who was not bound by some family tie to remain at his side…

 

Kamui averted his eyes. “I-I'm sorry…did I make you uncomfortable?”

 

“No, not at all.” Subaru did his best to force out a weak smile for him. “I enjoy your company as well, Kamui.”

 

Death, death, death…Seishirou glared at Kamui. It was becoming a ritual for Subaru to meet with this irritating boy every day, and slowly, the little brat was edging closer on what belonged to him. Subaru treated him with kindness and generosity, completely oblivious to the boy's intentions. He was too innocent to see it. Seishirou, however, was not fooled, and every little glance or shy word that the two exchanged increasingly annoyed him.

 

Yet what irked him the most was that Subaru smiled around this Kamui. It was not a genuine smile, of course, but it was a smile all the same. He wanted to rip off the boy's arms for forcing such a reaction out of his Subaru-kun.

 

But even if this annoyed him to no end, Subaru was even more beautiful with that faint, breakable smile because with that expression came a completely different emotion in his eyes. When Subaru smiled, it was as if glass was shattering in the depths of those emeralds; his smile may have been for that insolent brat, but his eyes were distant and lost with thought. And Seishirou knew that Subaru's thoughts rested on him—that the smile really belonged to him. If nothing else, this knowledge prevented him from carrying out an assault on Kamui.

 

They continued studying over various textbooks while the sun descended closer to the reddening horizon.

 

“Subaru?”

 

He looked up from one of the papers spread over the stone table. “Yes, Kamui?”

 

The boy anxiously bit his lower lip. “Why is it…I mean, if it's alright to ask…why did you drop out of school?”

 

Subaru's face darkened with pain, and Kamui regretted ever asking the question. “Him…it was after he left, after…what he did, that I gave up on my dreams. All that mattered to me was to find him.”

 

Far away, Seishirou was raising an eyebrow at this strange confession from his prey.

 

“Sakurazukamori.” Kamui laced every syllable of the name with disdain. “He's why you came to this school as well.”

 

“Yes. So I can continue to find him.”

 

“Subaru,” admonished Kamui. “Your life shouldn't revolve around him.”

 

“But it does,” he replied bitterly. “Everything revolves around him…because Seishirou-san is—”

 

“Kamui! There you are!” A high voice squealed behind them. Subaru abandoned whatever he was about to say, and found Inuki staring up at him with Yuzuriha bounding close behind.

 

“Sora wanted me to find you! It's almost time for dinner!”

 

Subaru stared away from the veranda, surprised that he just now noticed how late it had become. “Ah. Well, you should go Kamui. I don't want to keep you.”

 

“Subaru-san, you should come too! It's been forever since you ate dinner with us!” Yuzuriha insisted.

 

He scratched behind Inuki's ear. “No thank you. I will be alright.”

 

Kamui narrowed his gaze on him. “You really should come and eat something, Subaru.”

 

When he politely refused again, Kamui sighed and began to walk away with Yuzuriha.

 

“Can you blame him, Kamui!? It's Arashi's turn to cook tonight. I wish I was with him!” she groaned.

 

He watched them disappear into the distance before lighting a cigarette and taking a long drag. He did not want to disappoint the others, especially Kamui, who was in dire need for a friend, but Subaru knew that he did not quite belong with his fellow Seals. All of them had a chance to find happiness despite destiny, but he was different.

 

He recalled the last time he had shared a meal with them at Imonoyama Mansion. The atmosphere was uncomfortably strained, and each word of conversation had to be forced. It was as if his very presence was dark and gloomy, and his own pain was contagious. He knew then that it was best to keep a distance from the others—they would all be better off if they associated with him as little as possible.

 

Despite his attempts to do just that, Kamui continued to ask him to help with his schoolwork. He could not understand why it should be him to help the teen and not someone smarter and more enjoyable to have around, someone that Kamui could have as a real friend. He was a poor substitute, but Subaru could not find it in his heart to refuse him, especially when any further disappointment could shatter the boy.

 

Realizing that the sun had nearly set, Subaru stubbed out his cigarette, and ventured away from the sanctuary of the veranda, not yet aware of a shadowy bird's following gaze. He wandered along the edge of campus, occasionally glancing up at the sky as the last streaks of copper light surrendered to the night.

 

He contemplated returning to his apartment and falling asleep. His dreams were often unpleasant, and he always woke up more disheartened and exhausted than before. Nevertheless, sleep saved him from losing himself in his thoughts. It saved him from thinking of Seishirou.

 

He shuddered at himself, trying to shake loose his thoughts of the Sakurazukamori. Seishirou had remained with him for almost the entire next day when he was in bed, too exhausted to drive him away. He remembered that day as a dream where only broken pieces of Seishirou's presence could be recalled. But Seishirou was there, caring for him as if he was a sick child, and this memory haunted and confused him.

 

Subaru stopped walking and observed a flock of birds soaring past him as he treaded down a secluded sidewalk. Why did Seishirou go through all of that trouble to see that he got well? He gravely acknowledged that it could not have been genuine concern, but only another game for Seishirou to play. Yet it was a very strange game, nonetheless.

 

Subaru, for one, was sick of these games—each possessive grope at his waist, those false acts of kindness—he could not stand Seishirou for playing with him. He did not want to be a victim anymore. He remembered his family, he remembered Hokuto, and fought back with all the willpower he had. And yet, whenever Seishirou touched him…

 

He broke away from his thoughts, and frowned when he noticed the same flock of birds passing back over him. There could be no mistake. Ofuda already in hand, he singled out the leader of the flock, an all too familiar bird of prey. With a quick chant, he let his spell fly and was not surprised to see the bird dissolve in a flash of light while the others broke away in panic.

 

He nervously whipped around, almost expecting Seishirou to instantly appear. After a few quiet seconds, Subaru balled his fists and shouted at the sky. “Seishirou-san! Show yourself! I know you're not far away!”

 

Little did Subaru know, as he was walking away from campus, he was approaching the very place that Seishirou watched him from so that he was quite correct in his exclamation. When he whirled around again, Subaru collided into the Sakurazukamori.

 

Seishirou's arm wrapped over his shoulder before he could pull away. “I was wondering when you were going to notice,” he jeered, but beneath that mask, he was quite impressed that Subaru was able to find and dispel his shikigami.

 

“What are you doing here!?” demanded Subaru.

 

“I wanted to admire my Subaru-kun's beauty,” he professed adoringly.

 

“And so you used your shikigami to spy on me?”

 

Seishirou brightened. “Does that mean it's alright if I admire you up close, then?” His other arm settled over his waist.

 

Subaru let out a disgusted growl and managed to twist away from his arms.

 

He laughed while his prey narrowed those jade eyes over him. Subaru muttered something under his breath about stalkers and began to briskly walk down the street, hoping that Seishirou would not follow. Unfortunately, he felt the other man's steps close behind his own.

 

“Actually,” began Seishirou as he kept up with him. “I was hoping to walk you home, Subaru-kun.”

 

He sped up his pace. “Walk yourself home!”

 

Seishirou was not about to let him escape. “It would be dangerous for someone so pretty to walk alone at night!”

 

Subaru was practically running now. “I'll manage just fine! Go away!”

 

“That's not very courteous, Subaru-kun! All I asked was if I could escort you home.” He quit running after him, but shouted out to the fleeing onmyouji. “After all, I enjoy your company more than anything!”

 

Subaru froze with his eyes wide open. Seishirou had heard that conversation with Kamui? God, what else did he hear?

 

In the time Subaru halted in his escape, Seishirou victoriously approached him and embraced his shoulders. He enjoyed every detail of Subaru's shocked expression, especially when he noticed how hard his prey was trying not to blush.

 

“I was thinking of a nice, long walk through the city. Doesn't that sound lovely?” Only Seishirou's voice could be so sinister and innocent at the same time.

 

Subaru swallowed hard. “Seishirou-san. What else did you…?” He trailed away, not daring to finish the question as he felt Seishirou leering over him.

 

“Why, Subaru-kun, I haven't the faintest idea of what you're talking about,” he lied sweetly. “I only said what a pleasure it is to be in your company.” He then took advantage of the Sumeragi by guiding him while he was still uncertain and taken aback.

 

Subaru felt his heart sink. What if Seishirou really had heard what he said to Kamui? Everything revolves around him, because Seishirou-san is…

 

He came back to his senses when he felt Seishirou's hand taking his own. He then realized that they were no longer on the dark sidewalk, but exposed under the streetlights in public. People were staring. Again, he panicked and tried to squirm away. Seishirou held onto him firmly.

 

“Seishirou-san!” he growled.

 

“Now Subaru-kun, you wouldn't want to cause a scene,” he chided with amusement.

 

This made him stop struggling, although he could not hide an infuriated blush as they continued down the street hand-in-hand. He felt that all eyes were gawking at him, which was not so far from the truth. He shot daggers at Seishirou, who led him forward heedless of the looks.

 

“Do you enjoy humiliating me?” he whispered venomously.

 

“Very much so,” answered Seishirou with a devious grin. “Although, if I really wanted to embarrass you, Subaru-kun, I would do something like this.”

 

He smacked his palm against the Sumeragi's behind before he could shy away. Subaru let out a terrified squeak, and his face deepened a few more shades of red.

 

“Seishirou-SAN! Damn you, let me go this instant!” he screamed at the top of his lungs, drawing unwanted stares and mutters from the entire block.

 

Seishirou laughed. “What was it that I just said about causing a scene?”

 

Subaru was fuming. “I don't care! Let go of my hand!”

 

“But if I do that, you'll run away, and you might become sick on your way home again,” he remarked with everything but concern. “Or do you want to sleep with me again, Subaru-kun?”

 

Subaru was now degraded beyond words. Seishirou had said that last part too loudly. He thought he was about to faint as he was dragged forward. Seishirou was ruthless with him, and he was not going to stand for it anymore. The moment that man turned around again with that smug grin, God help him, he was going to—

 

All of the sudden, he found himself stumbling to the hard ground after his ankle was caught under a teen's extended leg.

 

Seishirou was quickly hunched over him. “Are you hurt?” he queried. When Subaru failed to answer right away, he was lifted into the Sakurazukamori's arms.

 

The teen that had tripped him began to snigger past the two, but did not get far. Without any change of expression, Seishirou drove a fist into his face, and calmly carried Subaru down the now-silent street.

 

Subaru barely had sense of what just happened so that he was speechless as he was being carried past the searing city lights. Had Seishirou just defended him? He thought that being humiliated and played with was the other man's only vice for him; it was astonishing to think this was any different. But he knew that Seishirou did not do this out of concern or passion; he was no longer so naïve. No doubt, it was a twisted act of possessiveness, but no matter how much this thought diminished what he had done, Subaru was still in awe of him.

 

When he noticed that he had let Seishirou carry him unchallenged for too long, he squirmed in those arms. “Put me down.”

 

He was surprised when Seishirou did so without any smart reply. He allowed the Sakurazukamori to lightly brush him off, but began to struggle against him when his hands did not leave his body.

 

“Don't, Seishirou-san…” he warned, while the other man rubbed his back.

 

“You're cold again, Subaru-kun…you're always so cold,” he remarked. Subaru breathed with relief when he took a step away, but warily eyed him as he removed his suit jacket. Seishirou draped it over his shoulders, smirking at the Sumeragi's bemused face.

 

Subaru shifted uneasily in the oversized jacket, unsure of whether to thank him or slap him in the face.

 

Seishirou kept grinning, pretending not to notice his confusion. He offered his hand to him. “Shall we continue?”

 

Subaru shot him another look and brushed past him. Seishirou chuckled at this, but followed close behind so that eventually he was guiding Subaru's thin waist.

 

The onmyouji kept silent, fearing that whatever he might say would be twisted around later. He had already been humiliated enough for one night.

 

He was grateful when Seishirou was guiding him to the stairs of his apartment. This hellish night was almost over. When they approached the door, Subaru broke away from him and removed the warm jacket.

 

“Here,” he muttered, handing it back. He then went to unlock the door, hoping that Seishirou would leave without another word.

 

“Subaru-kun,” he purred.

 

Subaru flinched; he should have known better by now. Leaving the key in the lock, he turned around to find Seishirou inches away. His pulse raced as arms fastened over the small of his back, pulling him against the other man's broad chest.

 

“What?” he said as coldly as he could without betraying his anxiety.

 

He removed his sunglasses, and his caramel eye probed deep into him. “You know, you never needed to sacrifice so much to find me. Even if your life does revolve around me.” Subaru glared through his mortified blush, and Seishirou pinned him against the door. “Because, Subaru-kun, I will always be there to find you.”

 

He pressed his lips over Subaru's, kissing him laboriously so the Sumeragi moaned and quivered against him. His lips were so soft and warm that Subaru forgot to struggle, forgot to hate him, and forgot that this was the man who continually ruined his life. And he immersed himself in that mesmerizing kiss so that the rest of his world could very easily have been forgotten.

 

The moment came and left too quickly, and they broke away for air. Subaru recollected his senses, and realized with horror that he was clinging feebly to Seishirou's shoulders. With an ashamed cry at himself, Subaru pushed him away and locked himself in his apartment. He could hear Seishirou chuckling on the other side of the door.

 

“Pleasant dreams, Subaru-kun.”

 

Subaru listened in that awful silence for Seishirou to tread away before sliding against the door with a frustrated growl. How could he let Seishirou control him like that!? He swore to himself more fiercely than ever that he absolutely could not stand that man!

 

Yet thirty minutes later, he would already begin to forget this. Instead he wondered why it was that he felt so warm inside.

 

Or that his lips were still tingling.