Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ Hisoka Doll ❯ Shattered Glass ( Chapter 2 )

Title: Hisoka Doll

Author: Elf Asato

Pairings: In a really weird way, Faceless Doll + Hisoka…but it's not like that!

Warnings: General weirdness, and it occurred to me that Hisoka might be really OOC…but…I have my reasons and he knows this ^_~

Disclaimer: You know the drill ^_^

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Hisoka Doll

By Elf Asato

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Second Chapter

"Shattered Glass"

It's the total silence that gets me every time. I'm so used to the fuzzy white noise that when it's not there…the silence is deafening. Isn't that odd? How can silence be deafening? It's like…jumbo shrimp or something… Sometimes I still wonder if that's what Hell's really like - nothingness. The silence so loud and deafening that it pains your ears; the total darkness so blinding that you have to shield your eyes…and you're so afraid to speak - to shatter that nothingness - that it bottles up inside you so tightly that you feel you might go insane.

"This…" I whispered, not able to take the silence anymore, "must be what Hell is really like…"

"You think so?"

It was a shock to the system to have the two senses pierced so suddenly. He was there…standing right in front of me like he had been there the whole time…that faceless child…

"…You…"

"Me," he replied softly, but held his hand up and pointed…but why at me?

"…Why…?" I asked quizzically, gathering the courage to speak above a whisper, "…Why me?" I as I said this, I held a hand up to my heart, but he took my hand and put it up to his own.

He's so cold…

"Because…we're the same."

Regrettably, that's all he said - so many unspoken words flew around the darkness that it was hard to just reach out and try to catch even one little thing. And when I felt his nonexistent lips rest gently on the hand he held onto…a slight blush rose up my cheeks and I tried to say something - anything - but once he smiled with those nonexistent lips of his…

"Hey, let's have some tea, my Hisoka doll!" he cried out with affection and excitement. As if by magic, the shadows revealed a small table complete with an entire tea set and he somewhat dragged me to it, sitting me down enthusiastically. He almost danced as he seated himself right across from me, enjoying playing my host entirely too much.

Once a child, always a child.

The light melody of his humming filled the silence as he poured tea into both our cups. Curiosity prompted me to ask what exactly the tea was…and the answer was quite surprising.

"It's not tea - it's cyanide."

"C-cyanide??" I panicked as I backed away frantically.

Should never have put my guard down! Why did I even trust someone?!

"Yes, we're out of tea right now so this will have to do. Don't you like it?"

"N-no!!" I sputtered, everything coming as a shock and knocking me off guard. "C-cyanide…?! That's lethal!"

Despite my panicking, he held a calm exterior, but was slightly hurt. "You don't like it…but you haven't even tried it. …See?" he muttered as he held the cup to his cup to his face and…drank. …I suppose it all just absorbed into him…but still, I rudely stared with morbid fascination. "Tastes like almonds," he remarked happily.

And he was just fine.

"But…it'll kill you…" I muttered softly, feeling somewhat helpless.

"Am I dead?" he asked good-naturedly. "You're just a doll, don't forget - my doll. So go on, have some. It tastes like almonds…don't you want to at least smell it?"

It must have been the total silence from before that drove me crazy because I found myself inching up to my cup, cautiously smelling it. And…it smelled like almonds…

The boy just giggled, the light ring piercing into nothingness. "If cyanide was really that lethal to you, I think you'd be dead by now."

I looked at it cautiously just…not understanding. "You mean…it won't kill you after all…?"

"Oh no, it's very lethal alright," he said with morbid amusement, "but just not to you or me."

"Why?"

Even though my eyes were blind to it, I knew he smiled. "Because we're dolls - caught in the eternal limbo between the living and nonliving. It's something that can't be helped; that's just the way it is."

With slight hesitation, I let my guard down once again and lifted the cup to my lips, the sweet smell of almond immediately filling my senses. As…odd as it was…I really enjoyed that cup I had…that cup of cyanide.

"Would you like more?"

I must be insane…I truly must…

"…Yes please…"

He was just absolutely radiant as he poured me a second cup. "Your eyes are beautiful, you know that?"

"What…? Oh…yeah…I get that a lot…" I muttered as he handed my now-full cup to me.

"I want her to paint me eyes like yours…they're so beautiful. Hisoka…do you think she would love me more if I had eyes like yours?"

"…No, I don't think she would. She'd love you for you."

Half of me stuck to what I said, but the other half desperately wanted to take it back…because once those words left my mouth, his entire mood fell.

"…Really…so…she doesn't really love me at all, I guess…"

I hated to see him unhappy. "What makes you say that?"

"…She gave him a name…him a face…why not me? D-does she really hate me that much?!" He was becoming emotional…I couldn't stand it… "I hate him! I hate him, I hate him! He's stolen everything I've ever had!" Although I couldn't see it, I knew he was deeply hurt by it… I felt so bad. "Why not me?!"

As soon as the words escaped him, he slammed his cup on the table in an angry fit, shattering it and spilling cyanide everywhere. I flinched as a shard of porcelain grazed my skin…

As he leaned over the table…overflowing with concern…I knew what he was about to do, but…for some reason, I made no attempt to stop him. His…lips…grazed over my cheek…the spot that should have bled…but didn't…

And the porcelain shard had cut deep enough, too…

"I'm sorry," he muttered, not bothering to move at all. I guess I should have been freaked out him not making an effort to move…but then again, neither was I. "I broke my doll…shattered your skin…I'm sorry."

"I-it's okay…it'll heal anyway… In fact, it should be all better by now," I muttered, increasingly aware of the sensation…of him this close…of my entire face flushing.

"…But it's not okay… Your cut is still there… I'm sorry, my dear Hisoka doll. I'm sorry."

"…What?! You mean it hasn't healed yet?!" I panicked, for the second time that night (or morning?). I jerked away from him and instantly began feeling my cheek…gasping when I found what I hoped wasn't there…

"That's going to leave a scar," he said sympathetically, but it never really registered to me… I hadn't healed yet because there was still this cut on my cheek…but…what shocked me even more so was that it hadn't even bled. The cut was dry.

"I…I'm not even bleeding…"

"…No…you were never bleeding…"

My full attention snapped back at him and I stared at his faceless existence… "W-why?"

"Because," he began softly as his finger reached out to trace the path of my cut, "dolls don't bleed. They have no blood to bleed with and they don't heal. They just…crack…and shatter…like glass."

My mouth gaped open, trying to say something…anything… Nothing came out, though…but I'm sure it was a good thing because I don't think I had anything intelligent to say anyway.

"You're a doll, Hisoka," he stated gently, his finger resting lightly on my cheek, "my doll. You're my favorite, you know that? Always will be. Forever. You know why? Because that's how long our existence is. Until our body breaks…forever." He giggled and his finger resumed its path. "You have porcelain skin, my Hisoka…it's very beautiful. What a gorgeous porcelain doll…my Hisoka doll. One of a kind…just mine…"

I couldn't remember anything beyond except for when I woke up… I suppose that's the trouble with dreams. They're such tricky bastards. Any yumemi, I'm sure, will tell you, but…the worst thing is not being able to tell a dream from reality.

I know this truth because…well, when I woke up…

…I had a scar.

Chapter End

Ending notes: Oh and…this chapter is one of those "please don't try this at home" things… Cyanide will kill you. So…don't be weird like Hisoka and that doll thing and try to drink it… With that aside, I really don't mean to make this into a romance between Hisoka and a doll… Er, I think I accidentally combined two chapters into one…oh well. Just out of curiosity, though, any predictions on where this is going? (And yes, I do know…surprisingly ^_^) But…if you're right, I'm going to fwap you on the head for knowing! …Of course, I'll leave your fwapping until after this is over and my point (er, if there is one…) has been made… And…dear lord, I SWEAR I did not mean to make this into doll porn…(^_^)

And thank you everyone who has reviewed!!!!!!!!