Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ Nothing If Not By Your Side ❯ Boy's night out ( Chapter 4 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

*****4*****


Kyoto.

Familiar, busy streets, winding walkways, breathtaking scenery, and wrenching memories of the past. This city is *their* city. Their obligation. Every face in the crowd could be their next assignment. Every change in the wind could signal the approach of some new, unexpected threat. It is their link to the cold, cruel world, even if they long to avoid it.

Despite all this, they walk along in a cloud of peaceful wonder, side by side in the brisk, night air, without a single thought out of place.

"Ne, Hisoka, we should try our fortune again!" Tsuzuki exclaims, bouncing enthusiastically towards the small shrine beside the path.

It is the same one they tried their luck at once before, but the outcome hadn't been a positive one. The pair's compatibility had proven to be absolutely zero. Naturally, such a result is entirely unacceptable.

"Say yes, 'Soka! I hate getting bad news. Fate should know by now what good partners we are. Dozo!!"

Annoyed by his companion's whining tone, Hisoka rolls his eyes with an audible sigh of disinterest, but nods anyway. Better to give in right away rather than suffer the affects of puppy-dog eyes and pawing at his sleeve to get him to change his mind. Tsuzuki never fails to get his way; it's just too hard to say no to him.

"You're so nice, 'Soka!" the violet-eyed man beams, looking as if he's about to focus every ounce of energy within him on swaying the fortune's outcome. "This time we'll get it right. We belong together, ne?"

Hisoka doesn't reply, folding his arms sourly in front of him as Tsuzuki snatches up the small slip of paper. It's not as if he's trying to cast a dark cloud over their evening, he just finds his partner's boisterous attitude a bit childish. But what did he expect? Tsuzuki is a kid at heart, always has been, and truthfully, that is exactly what Hisoka admires in him.

Perhaps the real reason the grown young man is wavering in his ability to relax lies in that very observation. Wherever he turns, there stands Tsuzuki beside him: smiling, laughing, looking so vibrant and full of life.

Life. Tsuzuki isn't even truly alive anymore, and he displays more humanity than most living, breathing human beings.

"You hold on to it, 'Soka. I want to wait till the end of the night before we find out." the grinning brunette suggests, handing over the fortune for Hisoka to put in his pocket. Hisoka obeys with little thought, following his carefree friend down the path as they continue along. "Such a beautiful night." Tsuzuki smiles, breathing in deeply while closing his eyes, and stretching out every one of his senses to feel even the slightest change in the wind. "Why have we stayed away for so long?"

"You know why..." Hisoka mumbles beneath his breath. It had merely been reflex, without thinking about what he was saying, but although his voice was low, Tsuzuki heard every word.

The last time they were in Kyoto, Tsuzuki had nearly died, for the final time. Calling upon his own powerful shikigami - Touda with his merciless, black flames of destruction - Tsuzuki had summoned death itself, and waited for it to consume him. The only reason he is still here, is because Hisoka promised they could live for each other.

Hisoka promised they could share eternity together.

The pair pauses along the walkway, nearly identical in their sudden halt. Grievously, Hisoka casts his gaze down, ashamed for being so careless. How could he so blindly bring that awful memory back to the surface?

The heat from Tsuzuki's eyes scorches his tender skin as the taller man turns to look at him. Funny thing is, their difference in height has decreased tremendously. Hisoka is barely an inch shorter than his partner now. Nevertheless, this advantage doesn't reduce his unease in the slightest.

"Gomen...forget I said anything." Hisoka dismisses, refusing to meet that piercing stare, and brushing past Tsuzuki as he moves on ahead.

For a moment, light, faltering footsteps follow from behind, but it is only a matter of time before Tsuzuki feels the need to speak. "Hisoka...?" he whispers, stopping in his tracks again, and wearing the most sincere and delicate expression imaginable as his companion turns back to face him. "You don't have to be brave for me. I know what happened here, but it isn't a sad memory. Not really. You think about how things almost turned out. I think about how they did. And what *did* happen is you saved me. There's no pain in remembering that."

The gentle rustle of Tsuzuki's voice, the hint of moisture in his eyes, the soft smile on his lips, it is all a sight Hisoka recognizes and has seen many times before. This new body of his, however, takes in the sight in a manner his former self never did.

There is a fluttering in his stomach, a sensation bordering on the familiar, but impossible to be something he could have ever understood before. He doesn't even truly understand it now. He just feels it. Feels the warmth of it. And that scares him.

"Tsuzuki..." Hisoka begins, unable to find or finish a fitting thought. Gods be praised, at that very moment he is bestowed with the vision of inviting lights through the trees at the end of the path. "...we're supposed to be having fun, ne? That's what you promised." he finishes, latching on to this new distraction. "If you're going to live up to what you said...then I want to go there."

Following Hisoka to the clearing, Tsuzuki realizes they have come to a side street downtown, and across the road blinks the sign for "Tenku's Tavern."

A bar.

"Honto ni? You want to go *there*, Hisoka? Doushite? I thought you hated places like that."

"Only because I've been too small to hold my own against you." Hisoka replies, bearing the tiniest traces of a teasing smile. "Until now, that is."

Such an expression is utterly unbelievable to be placed upon the young man's face, yet alone slipping its way into his voice. Simply put, Tsuzuki is positively dumbstruck.

"Nani?" the younger man questions in reply to his partner's dubious look. "Don't you think I can handle a drink the way you can? It's not as if you're much competition I'm old enough now. Big enough. I want to go. You did say it was *my* decision, ne?"

Tsuzuki doesn't reply at first, put off by the premonition of something he can't quite place. He isn't an empath like his oddly behaving friend, but he knows full well when he is being deceived. It may be true that Hisoka feels a need to prove something here, especially considering what happened the first time they met, but there is definitely something else.

Against his better judgment, though, Tsuzuki smiles and gives his consent, even if deep down he is certain that Hisoka is avoiding him. Not *him* directly, but a feeling being produced by his company. A feeling Hisoka wants to go away.

They enter the bar and claim a few stools up at the counter. It isn't very full, an out-of-the-way place, which is a welcome surprise to both of them. Hisoka has never been one for crowded places, and Tsuzuki would very much prefer to have his partner all to himself tonight.

"What do you want, Hisoka?" the brunette asks, veiling his humor over the question as best he can. After all, what does Kurosaki Hisoka know about alcoholic beverages?

"Ahh...you order for me. I'd take too long deciding."

Grin. "Of course. How about we keep things simple then?"

Tsuzuki calls the bartender over, and with that same mischievous smirk, orders sake for both of them. Simple, but with a cunning twist. There is an almost imperceptible irony to this choice, for it was the same drink that had complicated their first meeting all those years ago.

Fighting over food - along with just about everything else - the pair's pointless duel had come down to Hisoka angrily tossing back Tsuzuki's glass of wine. It was done in spite, of course, and at the time Hisoka wasn't aware he was drinking anything stronger than grape juice. He was truly sixteen then, only recently having passed away, and the shock to his system knocked him right off his feet.

Neither of them will ever forget it.

When their order arrives, Tsuzuki starts in right away, casually, utilizing decades of experience, while Hisoka takes a few minutes to stare into his glass, debating whether or not he has chosen the right escape for evading his feelings.

"Hisoka?" Tsuzuki begins, taking a long drink, and watching his younger friend humorously out of the corner of his eye. "How old are you now, anyway? I never asked."

"Around 23, I guess."

"23? You have a lot of years to make up for then, ne? What are you waiting for?"

The question is an obvious challenge, one Hisoka isn't going to let his incredulous friend get away with. He glares for a moment, narrowing his lime-green eyes, and then with resolved resolution, downs the drink almost as fully as he had downed his potion a few hours before.

This robust liquid burns its way down as well, though the feel of it is far smoother, far more agreeable, and this time it doesn't overpower him.

Tilting his head towards his partner, Hisoka raises an eyebrow at Tsuzuki's initial shock, enjoying a surge of control and the acquisition of the upper hand. "Make up, did you say?" he mocks, allowing his smile to form even more completely than before. "I'm just getting started."

And so the night begins, unlike any they have ever shared together. Countless times Hisoka has seen Tsuzuki drink a little more than he should, but never before has he been able to join in. It's not really a contest of who can drink who under the table, though it might have turned into that. This is a twisted way for them to bond again, newly and refreshed with the change that has swept into their lives.

They actually talk. Not just about assignments, but about themselves. About friends and family. Hopes and dreams. Fears and worries. Even if the details are often left by the wayside. In fact, the details become more and more vague as the evening wanes on, and by the time they realize they have overstayed their welcome, who they are to each other has been altered, even if it is still the same.

"I think I almost had you laughing tonight, 'Soka." Tsuzuki mutters through oncoming exhaustion. The night has grown quite late, and now that they are back in Meifu, Hisoka is walking along much steadier than his partner. "You surprise me. I figured I'd be carrying *you* to bed again, but instead you're carrying me."

Truthfully, Tsuzuki is leaning quite heavily against Hisoka as the younger man supports him on their way back to their apartments. In fact, the grown boy appears even more alert than he did on their way down to Earth now that they are heading home.

"I like your smile. So pretty." the brunette grins, rolling his head to rest on Hisoka's shoulder as he gazes up into his partner's face. "You should do it more often."

The steady blonde stares down in reply to this strange compliment, feeling a blush begin to creep its way up the back of his neck. "Baka, Baka, Baka." he whispers, edging towards sounding playful again. "You're dead drunk, Tsuzuki. Listen to you, talking nonsense."

"It isn't nonsense! You are veeeery pretty, 'Soka."

This time, the blush does all the talking, deepening scarlet over Hisoka's entire face. He pulls his eyes away from Tsuzuki's softened features, taking in a deep breath to still his pounding pulse. Suddenly, it is racing like the clicks of Morse code, and no matter how hard he tries, he can't get it to stop.

"Hai...my pretty Hisoka is still so pretty...all grown up and strong..." rants on Tsuzuki's distancing voice. He is barely holding up his own weight at all now, drifting off to sleep right where he stands, but his words continue to pour out, nonetheless. "...I made my Hisoka smile...and he wanted to laugh...even if he fought it away...so stubborn..."

"Baka..." Hisoka whispers again, shivering for no sensible reason, other than that same old fluttering in the base of his stomach.

They turn the final corner to the hallway housing both of their rooms, and as it has been since they first entered Meifu, not a single soul is out and about. That final turn was taken rather sharply, however, with Hisoka hugging the wall the entire time from the force of Tsuzuki against him. This disrupting movement unbalances what was already quite a bit off tilter, and Hisoka presses hard into the wall as his limp companion falls into him, draping over him as they tumble back.

Once again, Hisoka is being pinned by his partner, albeit unintentionally, and once again, Hisoka cannot bring himself to move.

He is stone-still and trembling.

Unbearably close, Tsuzuki's arms hang loosely around his neck for support, his head rests weakly on his shoulder, and their legs are lacing between each others', brushing together, as they stand chest against chest.

Hisoka's eyes stare wide in undue fear, while Tsuzuki's remain half-shut, barely aware of the position they are in. All he knows is that Hisoka is still with him. And if he had his way, Hisoka would never leave his side.

"...uhh...you smell so sweet...'Soka..." Tsuzuki breathes, tingling over Hisoka's skin with every whispered word. "...my Hisoka..."

Clenching shut, emerald eyes fight to keep from tearing up. Hisoka is struggling to hold Tsuzuki's emotions at bay, succeeding for a time in fending them off with his new control, but the foundation of emotion is still there, and he doesn't know how to react to what he is feeling from the man against him.

It's like a cascade of need and longing, wrapped within layers of kind and gentle care. But there is something else surfacing in this new intimacy forced upon them. Whether or not it is coming from Tsuzuki...that is yet to be seen.

"Tsuzuki...get off, Baka..." Hisoka demands, steadying his quivering lips as best he can with so many opposing forces. "Don't you dare think of falling asleep on me. Omoi!"

Regaining control, Hisoka pushes Tsuzuki away, hanging on tightly to keep the other man from falling to the floor, but freeing himself from such close quarters. Even in their separation, he feels the remnants of kindling heat low in his stomach, and can't help questioning why he almost welcomes the feeling.

(What is wrong with me...reading into him this way...? I have to stop thinking these foolish thoughts! This is Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki...)

Continuing onward, they reach Tsuzuki's room in only a few short strides, while Hisoka is now basically dragging his partner along, since the somewhat larger shinigami has finally fallen asleep on his shoulder.

The apartment is shadowy and dark as they enter, but there is no way to reach out for light when Hisoka's hands are so awkwardly full. Luckily, his eyes are sharper in this new form of his, and he makes his way over to Tsuzuki's bed with little difficulty. Placing the brunette down on the mattress, and situating him as comfortably as possible, the eerie irony of the whole thing strikes Hisoka suddenly, and he nearly laughs despite himself.

(Right back where we started from, ne? Only now we are reversed.)

Indeed, a gentle smile plays its way fittingly over the young man's newly grown features, like the finishing touches on a masterpiece. If a smile looked out of place upon him as a boy, it looks perfectly at home on his face as a man.

(Baka, Tsuzuki. What are you doing to me? These feelings...I remember...but they're different with you. I almost...want them...)

Backing away from the bed, Hisoka longs to escape the room almost as much as he longs to rush forward, but in the end his fear wins out, and he is heading back for his own room even before he himself realizes he is moving.

(How can I think these things? Tsuzuki would never think these things. It's all in my head. It's this body. I just need a good night's sleep, that's all. These thoughts will go away. They'll go away...)

He stops, his hand on the doorknob to his apartment, while his eyes linger back down the hallway to the room he just left.

Slipping his hand inside his pocket, Hisoka pulls out that forgotten slip of paper - their fortune. This time, the outcome reveals a complicated relationship filled with passion and love. Not a perfect compatibility, but near enough, and if Fate herself is trying to tell them something...

(...maybe I don't want them to go away...)


*****A/N*****


I bet I have all of you going, "Get back in that bedroom, Hisoka!!!" but you're just going to have to wait. There may be a few surprises in store, but I'm going to have to see how creative I can be when this turns into an "R" while still straying from what would be considered "NC-17". Don't worry, creativity is my strong point. Watch me make it work, and still make you melt.

Love ya all, and the reviews, so keep 'em coming, and see ya next chapter!