Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / Hamtaro Fan Fiction ❯ Duel Hams: Duelists of the Clubhouse ❯ lament of the dragon weilders ( Chapter 4 )

With Jam and Tyrone alongside the dueling hamsters of the Duel House, Boss and company went to visit Seamore. "Hey, Jam." Pashmina opened up.

"What's up, Pashy?" Jam acknowledged her.

"Do you go east, or west when you travel the globe?"

"Whichever way happens to show up, I'm not really picky about it."

"So which way do you prefer to go?"

"Either. Travel can be an incredible feeling, but... it can also bring incredible sorrow if you aren't careful."

"I see. I forgot that he lost Roll during one of his travels..."

Tyrone got interested in what he had just managed to ear. "It's not all fun and games, Pashy." he said.

Using the back of her paw, Pashmina smacked Tyrone. This action caused Sparkle to laugh at him. "Ow, what was that all about?" Tyrone was confused.

"Get it right, 'Fireboy'. My name is Pashmina." Pashmina corrected Tyrone.

"Okay, you don't have to tell me twice." Tyrone rubbed his cheek.

Dexter pats Tyrone's shoulder. "Only certain hams are allowed to use that name on her." he explained. "Not something for casual chat, but something you must earn."

"And you're one of those people?"

"Yes, but I don't call her that in public."

You don't even call me that in private, either. Pashmina thought to herself.

*

 

At their photoshop, Seamore and Barrette are developing pictures for a customer. "Almost done?" asked Seamore.

"Almost..." said Barrette, "almost.... almost.... bingo, we're done."

"Finally. Picture development is hard work, but we do it justice."

"That we do."

"Now that we're done with the pictures, let's focus on doing each other."

"Seamore, no. Remember what happened last time?" Barrette had a disdainful look on her face. "I'm not getting caught in an odd place again."

"What's so odd about giving me head?"

"You know what I mean, Seamore."

"Fine, I get it." Seamore pics up Barrette and places her on a nearby table.

"Seamore, what are you..."

"I figure that even you deserve a little head."

"No, I don't any head..."

"Stop lying to yourself."

Before Seamore could dive for tuna, so to speak, the bells of the door had chimed. Barrette was saved... momentarily. Damn customers.... Seamore thought as he headed for the door.

Thank the gods for customers. though Barrette happily.

 

"Yo, Seamore. Come out already, don't make us have to search for you." said Howdy.

"Yeah, remember what happened last time." added Stan.

"Don't remind me." said Seamore as he appeared from the back. "So what's shakin' with you guys?"

"A lot of bad stuff and we need somewhere to chill for a while." Jam answered.

"Jam, you're back."

"Yup. Oh, I also need some glossies from these shots from around the world." Jam handed Seamore his roll of film.

"Of course." Seamore took the film roll.

Barrette finally comes from the back. "The gang's all here, I see." she greeted.

"Here Barrette, Jam wants his worldwide shots made into glossies." said Seamore as he hands Barrette the film.

"Right. Any specific glossies, Jam?"

"Amaze me, but make them look cutless and clean." Jam answered.

"O-kay, I'll do my best." and off into the back Barrette went.

*

Afterwhile, Jam mad a meal for the crew, even Seamore and Barrette got in on the vittles. During the meal, Hamtaro and Boss explained the situation to Seamore and Barrette. "Well, I guess this sort of thing happens a lot to you guys, not that it's bad." said Seamore. "Er, I mean not bad all the time."

"It's cool. We know what you meant." said Boss.

"This is a good meal, Jam." said Barrette. "Just what is this, anyway?"

"Salmon." Jam answered.

Seamore and Barrette stopped eating. "Salmon, as in... actual fish?" asked Seamore.

"Yeah." Jam answered. "You guys aren't alergic to it, are you?"

"Aw man, I'm eating another animal...." Seamore's expression turn disgusted.

"I think I'm gonna be sick." said a disdainful Barrette.

"Ah shut up and stop whining, you won't die from eating fish." said Oxnard.

"And what happened to 'This is a good meal, Jam'?" Jam added.

"I think I won't have seconds." Seamore said politely.

"Yeah, I'm good too." said Barrette.

"Well give me what you didn't eat. you ungrateful hamsters." said Tyrone. "As long as it tastes good, it doesn't matter what you eat. Food is food, whether it's fish, chicken, or another hamster scrotum."

 

Everyone turned to Tyrone, even two of the girls who managed to keep from gagging and gave him quite the look. "Sorry, got the joke from Howdy." Tyrone said with a sweatdrop on his face.

"The hell you did!" Howdy barked at Tyrone.

"Anyway, You guys know about the Tactical Evolution set out now?" Barrette changed the subject. "The set has ninety cards in it and ten of the cards are secret rares... and one of those secrets is what people are calling a ghost rare."

"What the hell is a ghost rare?" asked Tyrone.

"I'll answer that one." Maxwell said. "I've heard about this from the dueling world. Apparently, a ghost rare is the newest rarity here."

"Get to the point already." Sparkle said.

"Anyway, you know how the picture of the card has certain effects and the name is written in different colors, well the ghost rare's trademark is the picture. It's like looking at a mirror, with only the outline of the card can be seen."

"Not exactly the outline, but the whole pic is seen." said Seamore. "The card does have the 'mirror without reflection' deal going on, but the color of the monster is blended in with it."

"Sounds pretty impressive." said Oxnard.

"It better be, especially since it's worth a lot." said Maxwell.

"Good luck getting your hands on a ghost." said Jam.

"Now I'm just waiting for the next ban list to come out." said Seamore.

"There's another ban list, aside from the one in June?" asked Cappy.

"Yes, but they haven't released it yet." Maxwell answered.

"Sure they have, and I got it." said Jam. "Thanks for reminding me about it, Seamore. Now I'll just post it up on the wall here and let you look at it. It doesn't go into effect until the first of September, which is tomorrow, but at least you can adjust your decks accordingly."

 

Jam put up the September 1st, 2007 ban list and everyone took a look at it. "Snatch Steal is back on the ban list." said Stan.

"Damn," said Dexter, "just when I was getting used to using it again..."

"Yes, the Magician of Faith is no longer banned." said a happy Cappy.

"Why are you ecstatic, you don't even use that card." said Sparkle.

"Hey, it's on the side."

Boss was content with the ban list. "Finally, Breaker the Magical Warrior is back." said Boss.

"Hello..." said Howdy. "Decks can have access to two Jinzos now."

"Damn it, I hate that monster." said Tyrone.

"Jinzo, the most devistating Machine in all of Duel Monsters is almost free play... time to ready my Hammer Shots." said Boss.

"Thank god Card Trooper is limited to one, those things are annoying." said Hamtaro.

 

"We can have another Crossout in our decks." said Hermana.

"We can also have two Avarice pots." said Penelope.

Rei looked at the ban list. "looks like I have to cut my Gadgets back to two each." she said.

"Well, Metamorphosis is gone, so I can't use that." said Jam.

Penelope heard this as well. Sorry Bubbleman, but you can't be upgraded anymore. Penelope thought.

"At least I can use two Royal Decrees." said Hamtaro.

"Not like they'll help you..."

Everyone turned to see Hiei, Aqua and Kerin. Hiei continued, "For someone like you, you couldn't even get it together with your warriors anyway."

"We really don't have time to deal with you right now, Hiei." said Hamtaro.

"Relax, my business is not with you. But I must say that those announcements of the ban list are truly something." Hiei took a look at the ban list. "Damn it, I was getting used to my Snatch Steal... oh well. I guess I have to downgrade to one Smashing Ground as well." Hiei makes his adjustments to his deck. "Much better."

"Nice new hairstyle, Aqua, you went from pigtails to a ponytail." said Rei.

"Ponytails are in style nowadays, I guess." Aqua said.

"I like mine." said Kerin as she ran her finger through her tail which was inbetween her ears.

 

Jam had a smile on his face. "Two things that bring duelists together... tournaments and the ban list." he said. "Makes me feel all warm and toasty inside."

"No, you just have gas." Hiei said.

"No, gas makes me bloated and discomforting inside." Jam laughed.

"So what are you doing here, anyway?" asked Rei.

"Simple, I'm here for you, Dragonlord. And now that my deck is accustomed to the new ban list, I am ready to challenge you again."

"Didn't you learn from the beatdown you got last time?" asked Stan.

"Memory serves that you were beaten in two turns and flawlessly, so don't talk shit that your less than third-rate skills can't back up."

"My, aren't I popular." said Jam sarcastically.

"Of course you are, you're the duelist to beat. And I plan on doing just that, since you barely slid past me last time.

 

"There is one thing, however. You must not use the Five God Dragon."

"I didn't think you have set handicaps for your duels, Hiei." Jam said with a shrug.

"I didn't think that you needed to depend on such a powerful monster..."

A bit of instigation from the bystanders. "Memory serves that you lost to me in the tournament, without my use of the Five God Dragon. And since you still haven't learned from the tournament when we last took to battle, it seems like I'm gonna have to teach you once again."

"Jam, wait a minute. Don't let Hiei get into your head because he couldn't get the job done against you the first time." said Hamtaro.

"Things are usually better the second time around, Hamtaro." Jam went into his fusion deck and pulled out the Five God Dragon. "Stan, receive!" and he tossed the card.

Stan caught the Five God Dragon. "Got it, and here it is." said Stan as he showed it to everyone.

Jam made an adjustment from his side deck and placed his deck back into the card holder of the duel disk. "Okay, Hiei. Let's see you deal with me now."

"Oh, you will be dealt with." said Hiei as he activated his duel disk.

"And here we go, Dragon Lord v Dragon Soldier 2." said Boss.

"You lost last time, so you decide who goes first." said Jam.

"I will, of course." Hiei said.

"I'll take a page from our Deckbreaker this time around. Diaha!"

"So be it. Diaha!"

 

And just like that, the duel was on. "Hope you're ready, Hiei. Jam's got some new cards." said Tyrone. "I know, I just lost to them."

"Of course you did." said Hiei, then he drew. "I'll start with two cards face down... Now for my soldiers... now I attack with this, Goblin Elite Attack Force." The sounds of marching are heard, then approach Hiei's monsters (2200/1500). "Ah, soldiers... iron clad and ready for war." Jam begins laughing again. "What is so funny this time?"

"You really haven't changed at all." Jam answered. "Everything is still a war and everything takes place on a battlefield with you."

"Hmf, 'All is fair in love and war', Dragonlord."

"You're one to talk about love and war. I mean, you're the only guy I know who gets more sexual saticfaction from war than from your girlham."

Aqua's expression turns heartbroken. You slick-tongued motherfucker..... Hiei was mad.

"Wow, I was only joking... but Aqua's expression says it all, it really is true. Panda has the decency to get away from computers and technical crap to get it on with his girlham, but he doesn't get off on servers and power tools." Jam went on.

Not anymore, at least. Panda thought, he was very impressed.

"Shut up and move already." Hiei had heard enough.

"Okay, fine. My move." Jam drew his card.

Jam is fucking with Hiei bad and it's the first move. thought Tyrone.

"Okay Tyrone, this move's for you." Jam announced. "I'll begin with The Cheerful Coffin. This spell lets me take up to three monsters in my hand my graveyard." Jam does just that. "Next, I'll summon Cyberdark Horn to the field (800/800). Okay Horn, activate Dragon Dive." and Jam's monster went into his graveyard.

"Wait a moniute... What is the meaning of this?" Hiei questioned.

CHING CHING CHING!

"That's right, you aren't aware of the Cyberdark monsters..." said Jam. "by themselves."

"You mean to tell me that Cyberdark Horn is..." Aqua trailed off.

"Correct, it's one-third of the Cyberdark Dragon. And as such it can use Dragon Dive. Do you remember how this effect works, Hiei?"

"Painfully, I do." Hiei answered. "Your monster searches the graveyard for a dragon-type monster and attatches itself to it, then reappears and takes the ATK points of the monster it's assimilated."

"Very good." said Jam. "However, I can only use a dragon that's up to three stars in level. Now let's see what happening. Horn, come on out." Cyberdark Horn returns to the field with company in tote. "As you can see, Horn is attatched to Masked Dragon, and Horn adds the ATK of that dragon to its own points (2200 ATK). And that's my move."

Hiei draws. "Interesting monster the Cyberdark Dragon is... but one component of that damned dragon will not stop me. I think I will bring out something as well. My Marauding Captain, for starters (1200/400). I will also bring forth this monster to attack you, Rare Metal Dragon (2400/1200)."

 

"One thing that hasn't changed... the way you pimp out the effect of Marauding Captain is still amazing."

"It's good you feel that I've amazed you, but now I will begin to destroy you. Reveal Ultimate Offering. <7500>. Now I'll sacrifice my three monster and call out Gilford the Lightning."

Gilfor the Lightning came out with sword in hand (2800/1400). His sword was charged by a bolt of lightning, then Gilford swung it down with one hand as it came for Jam's monster. So much for Cyberdark Horn. thought Jam as he saw the slash destroy Cyberdark Horn and Masked Dragon returned to the graveyard.

"Man, that was unexpected." said Stan.

"Because you don't have knowledge on holding your tongue, I will scold it." said Hiei. "Gilford, strike him down with Sword of Thunder!"

And just like that, Jam took one electrically charged slash that floored him <5200>. A few of the hams cringed at seeing Jam take that shot. "Looks like Hiei is ready to win, this time." said Tyrone.

"Jam, are you okay?" asked Pashmina.

"It hurts, but I've been hit with worse." said Jam as he tries to stand up. "Man, the fall sprained my ankle..."

"I'll do more than a trivial sprain." said Hiei. "That is what you get for insulting me and my mate. Now make your move."

Jam draws. I play Monster Reincarnation, discarding the last card in my hand with Masked Dragon in my graveyard, which I will play face down. That's all I've got."

"Of course it is." Hiei draws. "Gilford, prepare for some cavalry, I summon Dark Blade (1800/1500). Dark Blade, attack!" Hiei's monster destroyed Jam's face down Masked Dragon. "Now, I'm curious to see what you'll bring out due to Masked Dragon's effect."

 

Jam picked up his deck and heard a cry from one of his dragons before he began his search. "Hey... are you sure you wanna come out?" he questioned the cries and the cries responded. "Okay then, here we go."

"Quit mumbling and bring out my next target." said Hiei. "My patience is wearing thin."

Jam looked up at Hiei. "You know, my only regret is that I'm using this play way too soon. But sometimes, your dragons call out for action."

"Get on with it!" Hiei yelled.

"Fine. It's time for me to introduce to you another new dragon I managed to obtain during my travels. Everyone, say hello to the Decoy Dragon, who I'm placing in attack mode."

 

With this said, everyone saw Jam's new dragon come to the field, big eyes and all (300/200). "Aw, that dragon is so cute." said Pashmina.

"Look at those big, welcoming eyes." said Penelope.

 

"Can it cuddle?" asked Kerin.

"That is a cute dragon." said Aqua.

"Dragon's are not cute, nor are they cuddly." said Hiei. "They are forces of destruction waiting to be trained and raised. But in this case, Destroyed. Gilford, go in and attack this deceiver of a dragon."

Gilford the Lightning charged the Decoy Dragon and swun his sword down, creating a lot of smoke. When the smoke cleared, Hiei got quite an unexpected shocked in the form of what he had just attacked (2900/2500). "Wait a minute... that's the... Tyrant Dragon." said Aqua.

"Tyrant Dragon... explain this blasphemy now!" Hiei roared.

Jam rubbed his nose with his finger. "You were right about my Decoy Dragon being a deceiver, more than you know to be exact." he said and began to explain. "When the Decoy Dragon is targeted as an attack, the Decoy Dragon's ability lets me summon a high-leveled Dragon from my graveyard."

Hiei was stunned. "But how did the Tyrant get into your graveyard?"

"When I used Monster Reincarnation. I discarded him and set the Masked Dragon, preparing quite the defensive attack on you. Decoy Dragon also switches the attack target to the monster I summoned this way, but unfortunately, my Tyrant isn't the dragon you girls wish to cuddle with. Tyrant Dragon, counterattack with Tyrant Flame!"

After being tossed into the air by his sword, Gilford the Lightning was shot down and destroyed by Tyrant Dragon <7400>. The move got applause from the crew. "Wait a minute, where did the cuddly Decoy Dragon go?" asked Kerin.

"That dragon is not cuddly." Hiei told his daughter.

"It's like this, Kerin," Jam started to explain, "when Tyrant Dragon is special summoned from the graveyard, I must offer a dragon on my side of the field as a tribute. So in other words, Decoy Dragon took the place of my Tyrant Dragon. Thanks a lot, little buddy." Jam's Decoy Dragon nods at Jam from inside of his graveyard.

Even when I have control over the duel, a weakling dragon from the Dragonlord thwarts my plans! Hiei thought angrily. "All right, move." Hiei said to Jam.

Jam draws. "Time for a little Space." Jam's spell destroys Hiei's face down card. "Now attack, Tyrant Dragon." and just like that, Dark Blade is destroyed <6300>. "Your turn, Hiei."

Hiei draws. "Your turn."

Jam draws. "One direct shot, coming up."

 

Tyrant Dragon attacks Hiei, but his Kuriboh blocked the attack. "Not too shabby. Your turn."

Hiei draws. "I'll set one card face down and end my turn."

Jam draws. "Let's try Stamping Destruction."

"You've got to be kidding me..." said Hiei.

"Nope." Jam played his spell and it destroyed Hiei's card...

...or, it was about to. "Activate Scapegoat." Hiei chained his spell, and his scapegoats came alive.

"Well, I guess I can let that happen without you losing life." Jam shrugged. "In the mood for for lamb, Tyrant Dragon?" Jam's dragons growls peacefully. "I guess not. Well then, one card goes down and that's it."

I have a bad feeling about that card. Hiei thinks as he draws, but waits a while.... "Nothing... nothing was activated... I end my turn."

Jam draws. "Well, let's do it like this. I summon Gray Wing in attack mode (1300/700). Now Hiei, this is where you get your hat handed to you, with my trap card Dragon's Rage."

"No!"

"Yes. Now I'll discard the card in my hand to activate my Gray Wing."

"And this duel is over." said Stan.

"Tyrant Dragon, Gray Wing, two shots each. Attack!"

 

Jam's dragons flew in and dropped Hiei's Scapegoats and rushed him, knocking him down and ending the duel. No, Hiei lost again Aqua thought.

"Well, at least this time you lost to a powerhouse monster." said Jam. "But with or without the Five God Dragon, the result still brought my win. Only this time, I'm seasoned with this deck. Not like how I was when I dueled you with it the first time, when it was still in testing."

Hiei took to his feet. "You..." he trailed off. "I lost again...."

Aqua went to Hiei. "It's okay, winning isn't everything." she said to comfort him.

"That's not it..."

"Here you go, Jam." Stan said as he gave back what was Jam.

"Ah, thank-q." said Jam, but he saw that it was only the sleeve of the card. "Stan, give it back."

"Give what back?"

"Stan..."

"Okay, okay. Here." Stan gave Jam the Five God Dragon for real this time.

"You're passionate as always, but holding this dragon won't help you. It won't listen to you anyway, so there's no use in you having it." Jam placed the five God Dragon in its card sleeves.

"Wait, there's two sleeves?"

"Of course. These dragon sleeves are big, so I double-sleeved this deck. It makes your deck bigger than it normally is."

"So the Five God Dragon won't listen to him..." then appeared a gray colored hamster with black and white hair and silver colored eyes. "I am a different story, however." he continued to say.

"You...." said Dexter.

"What are you doing here?" questioned Howdy.

"Fools, I go wherever I damn well please." this new hamster said. "Look at you, Hiei. You truly have fallen off, shame that you have..."

 

This new hamster continued to talk. Judging by everyone's tension, this is one of those duelists that gave Boss and crew the boot from the clubhouse. Jam thought. I wonder what his story is...

"Just how long have you been here anyway?" asked Tyrone.

"Honestly, I've been around when I heard about that Decoy Dragon." the hamster answered Tyrone. "I managed to witness this duel from that point onward. So, you're the one Dragonlord that the world witnessed beat Duelist Ham. Word of mouth doesn't give you justice, but I plan on taking that justice from you anyway."

Jam smiled. "Didn't you learn from Duelist Ham about taking stuff from me?" asked Jam.

"Please... Duelist Ham is a arrogant joke, who thinks he's better than everyone else because he runs a duel disk company and has the assets to back it up. You proved to the whole world that that loser was just a bunch of hot air running the Blue-Eyes White Dragon. Now shuffle your deck..." this hamster's duel disk activates, "and prepare to duel."

"Looks like everyone does want some of this. Okay, fine." Jam says as he shuffles his deck. "But don't expect me to pushover like the majority of my hams here have."

"Only three of them are worthy, the rest are just jokes."

"My hams are never jokes. We have respect towards everyone, including our cards, even when we lose and after we win."

"Respect... respect and domination. You will find their dance is lethal in due time."

Jam's duel disk activated again. "Okay, that's quite the way of saying things. Well, let's get started."

 

And Jam began to duel this new threat to him. I hope Jam is careful, he beat everyone of us he faced with his deck. thought Stan. Don't take this guy likely, Jam.