Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Bittersweet Victory ❯ Bittersweet Victory IV ( Chapter 4 )

Disclaimer: *points to other chapters*

Warning: ….

A/N: First off I would like to apologize for taking so long in getting this out to you, especially those who have been waiting close to a year on me. ^^;;

Secondly I would like to thank all of my reviewers both old and new, your comments and or threats really mean a lot to me. ^_^. I just hope that poor Seto-kun and Yami-chan haven't been too badly hurt because of me.

Thirdly I would like to apologize for the shortness of this chapter. Truth be told I'm on the verge of absolutely loathing it. You don't want to even know how many times I came close to burning it, but then my Koishii would have killed me and I do not wish for my Koishii to kill me. I am not nearly satisfied enough with it and as with any story it is subject to revision and change.

Lastly, Stalker reviewers. *sigh* I do not mind people e-mailing me reviews, comments, threats, questions, etc. However e-mailing me every singe day, sometimes more than once a day with the same question over and over is just plain annoying. I write in my free time as a hobby. Currently between two jobs and night school and the hell that is life I have no free time. So please forgive me if I might seem a bit miffed at you sometimes and when my predictions for when a chapter might be done are not held.

Umm….*thinks* Yes. For those of you who asked to be notified for an update and haven't I'm very sorry. I've had an ungodly amount of `puter troubles and some information has been lost. To help avoid this in the future a new ml has been set up, I ask that anyone who joined my previous list join this one. You may join the list here.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/c2u_Shinjuu/

The above ml is for both mine and Shinjuu's fiks, Anime related and original.

And finally, no really I'm serious this time. ^_^. I would like to thank mine Koishii Vanyel Ashkevron. *hugglz chibi Vanyel-chan plushie* For without thou this would never be here, but would be little crisp, black ashes in the bottom of a trashcan.

Now thus ending this horrendously long AN, please continue to the story. ^_^.;;



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Bittersweet Victory IV

I watch unobtrusively from the shadows that line the wall opposite Seto's bed, my arms crossed loosely over my chest as I lean back against it. I would have liked to move closer but…. I do not wish to upset Seto if…if he even recognizes me… My gaze is drawn out of the shadows by movement and turns slightly to my right, focusing on the white clad form of the doctor as he looks at the instruments by Seto's side, occasionally glancing and scribbling something on the clipboard he'd had when I had found him.

Turning away from the monitors the doctor leans in closer towards Seto, saying something to him that is too low to hear. Faintly I catch the movement of Seto's lips as he whispers something back, his eyes sliding closed as he turns his head away from the doctor. A look of surprise passes over the doctors' features at Seto's words as he reaches into the pockets of his long white coat, pulling out a penlight. Turning Seto's head back towards him he clicks the small light on and shines it into one of Seto's eyes, which he held open. Seto flinches trying to turn his head away and brings up his hands to brush tiredly, weakly at the doctors own, more quiet whispers escaping his lips.

Satisfied with what he found the doctor turns the light off, slipping it back into his pocket as he turns to regard the monitors once more. Closing my eyes briefly I sigh, then push away from the wall allowing my arms to drop down by my sides as I move quietly towards the door. I no longer belong here. Seto is awake, and that is enough for me. I don't think I could handle his coldness if it were directed at me. If he were to tell me to leave…

As I reach out to turn the handle the doctor softly calls out to me, his voice momentarily taking on the tone and quality of Seto's own. Its timbre soothing and grating on my nerves. Closing my eyes briefly I take a breath, then turn slightly back in his and Seto's direction.

Looking up from where he was bent over Seto the doctor smiled softly. "Mutou-San would you mind staying for a moment please? I'd like to speak with you."

I remain where I am for a moment before lowering my head slightly in acquiescence, and slowly move to stand next to Seto's bed, my arms automatically coming up to cross in front of my chest. The doctor smiles up at me briefly, before straightening and turning to face the monitors by Seto's side. Lowering my lashes I allow my gaze to drift downwards to rest on Seto's hand, his fingers curled softly towards his palm. Their soft movement still a whisper in my mind. Slowly my gaze moves upwards, before hesitantly coming to rest on his face.

He's looking at me. His eyes are glassy, dull as they stare up at me from underneath lidded lashes, his fringe obscuring them from my view. Almost from their own accord my arms uncross, my right hand coming up to brush at his hair, gently moving it out of the way only to have it fall back into place. Withdrawing my hand I smile faintly. His eyes blink softly, their gaze following my movements, before drifting off to the left as his head turns to look at the doctor. My gaze, following his, settles on the syringe that is now being pulled from the inside of his left arm.

"To help him sleep." The doctor explains quietly, smiling lightly at me.

My eyes widen at his words and I can only stare at him in disbelief as he starts to gather up his clipboard, making a few last scribbles on its surface. To sleep? Seto's been asleep for four years and they want to put him back to sleep after he has finally woken up? After taking down his last notes the doctor steps around Seto's bed and starts to move towards the door, stopping just inside it when he notices that I haven't moved. "Mutou-San?"

Startled I turn slightly towards the door, looking at the doctor from over my shoulder as he waits for me. Turning back to Seto I reach out, resting my palm lightly against his cheek, briefly closing my eyes and then, letting my fingers draw slowly along his cold, pale skin, turn making my way over to where the doctor waited, wrapping my arms around myself as I stepped passed him into the hallway.

The doctor doesn't bother to close the door behind him as he follows me out into the hall stopping just outside of the room. Clasping his hands behind him he taps the clipboard lightly against the back of his knees, a reassuring smile finding it's way onto his features.

"Congratulations. You must be relieved that he regained consciousness. It must have been hard on you to see your partner like that for so long."

My eyes dart up to meet his briefly before drifting into the dim confines of Seto's room, my arms tightening marginally around myself as I whisper. "He's not my partner."

Out of the corner of my eye I can see the doctor flush lightly, embarrassment briefly crossing his features as he stammered. "I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to jump to conclusions; it's just that… I didn't mean any disrespect. If I've offended you in any way…"

Smiling softly I turn my full attention back to him, assuring him that no disrespect or offense was given. He remains uncertain of my assurances and remains quiet for a moment, the flush slowly starting to drain from his young features as he contemplates my words. My eyes lowering my gaze soon finds its way back to Seto's still form. To be Seto's lover would be an honor…

Clearing his throat the doctor regains my attention and I turn back to him noting the pink tinge that still stains his cheeks. "I know that there were some concerns regarding possible brain damage however, from what I could see there doesn't seem to be any extreme damage. As soon as he's rested we'll run a few test and see what we can find out. He appeared to be thinking clearly, he knows who he is, and although he wasn't too sure where he was at first he was able to figure that out." Pausing he cleared his throat. "However, when I asked him if he knew who you were, he said `no'."

My heart stops and I freeze at the doctors words, my whole being going numb. He didn't know me. He didn't know my face, couldn't place me. I was as much of a stranger to him as the man standing before me.

I'd always known in the back of my mind that amnesia was a possibility; that the trauma that Seto suffered might affect his personality, his memory. But Seto had recognized where he was, who he was. Answered all other questions to the doctor's satisfaction. But he hadn't recognized me…

"Mutou-San?" Startled I jerk my gaze upwards to lock onto that of the doctors. "Mutou-San, are you alright?"

"I…I'm fine. I understand."

Smiling softly the doctor reaches out resting his hand momentarily on my shoulder in a sign of comfort. "Don't let it discourage you. His lapse in memory may be a temporary thing. Once he's had time to rest and gather his thoughts together things should start to come back to him."

Numbly I nod my head to show that I understood.

"Mutou-San." Pausing the doctor glances briefly over at Seto. "Mutou-San, regardless of the nature of your relationship with Kaiba-San it is obvious that you care a great deal about him. Everyone here can see that. You've been coming here everyday for years now, and right now Kaiba-San needs that closeness more than anything. Right now he is feeling alone and scared. He knows where he is, but he doesn't understand why he is here. He needs to know that he is not alone, that there is someone here for him. He might not remember your name or who you are, but he knows you, he knows on some unconscious level that is was you who was with him, that is was you who led him back."

Smiling the doctor brings his clipboard up, flipping a few pages before hastily writing something down and tearing that page free, offering it to me. "I know that visiting hours are almost over, but if you like you may stay with him for a bit longer. It might help."

Numbly I reach out to take the paper, silently cursing at the slight trembling of my fingers.

"Stay as long as you like Mutou-San. If you need anything let us know. I'll get in contact with Kaiba-San's brother and let him know that he's regained consciousness."

"That won't be possible." I say, softly shaking my head. Seeing the confused look on the doctors face I try to explain. "Mokuba's currently out of the country."

"Aa, Well I could call Kaiba Corp., they…"

"Wouldn't tell you anything." Faintly I smile. "Seto may not be there, but… He wouldn't tolerate such a thing. I'll call Mokuba tonight and let him know."

"Are you sure?" The doctor asks uncomfortably.

"Hai. Don't worry about it. And thank you, for everything."

Beaming the doctor acknowledged my thanks before he was called away to his other duties. Clutching the note in my hand I turn back to Seto's dimly lit room, quietly stepping inside and moving to stand once again at Seto's side.

Biting my lower lip I study him quietly for a moment wondering if the drug had already taken it's desired effect and carried Seto back to the dark realm of sleep. As if sensing my presence though, his eyes open marginally to look up at me before sliding closed his head turning slightly away from me as he took in a shuddering breath.

"Seto-ku… Seto?"

His eyelashes flutter for a moment as he turns his head, settling his gaze back on me and what I see nearly tears my heart in two. Tears. They gather in the corners of his eyes, dampening his lashes every time they fall close. And beyond those tears, fear…

His brow creases for a moment and a look of uncertainty settles on his features, as though he were struggling with something that he couldn't quite grasp. His voice quiet he whispers softly. "Mokuba…?"

"Oh, Seto…" I whisper softly, reaching out to brush at a tear as it breaks free, moving my fingers across his cheek and then up to run lightly through his hair, my eyes sliding close. Mokuba. Of course he would remember Mokuba, would think of him first. For his little brother is everything to him, first and foremost in his heart. Briefly I feel a pang of jealously but push it quickly aside. Opening my eyes I find that more tears are now trailing their way down his cheeks and it takes me a moment to identify the cause of his distress. Scowling internally at myself I smile at him, gently brushing the tears away. "Don't worry Seto, Mokuba's fine."

Relief passes through his eyes and he sighs softly, his lashes lowering slightly as he continued to look up at me almost curiously, before he leaned marginally into my touch as I continued to brush my thumb gently over his damp cheek, seeking and accepting the comfort I offered him. As his eyes start to drift closed I wonder about what the doctor had asked or told him. Obviously he had neglected to mention the fact that Seto had been in a coma for the past four years and that Mokuba hadn't been injured on that day. But why he wouldn't have said these things… Sighing I focus on Seto once more, his eyes barely open as he turns his head even more into my hand, trapping it between himself and the pillow.

I frown softly as I have to lean forward some to accommodate this new, somewhat uncomfortable, position. Just as I contemplate gently removing my hand he sighs, causing his lips to brush against the inside of my upper palm and wrist in a feather light caress that steals the air from my lungs and makes my knees dangerously weak. Reaching out I steady myself, leaning forward and across just enough to cut off that touch. Taking in a shaky breath I close my eyes, ignoring the dull pain and protest coming from my still trapped hand; ignoring the pain in my soul from the loss of that delicate touch. It wasn't meant for me. He didn't mean to, he doesn't know… He doesn't even know who I am…

"Seto?" I whisper softly. Getting no response I open my eyes to find his fully closed, his breath coming out in soft even puffs of air that lightly tease my skin, sending a shiver up my arm and to my spine. Licking my lips softly I lean all the way across so that my whole lower right arm rests on the bed by his side, my chest resting gently against his. Bringing my left hand up I lightly brush it through his dull brown locks, imagining the softness they had once held. "Se…Seto-kun…?"

He stirs lightly this time, his eyes slitting barely open, before starting to fall once more. Quickly I repeat his name and his eyes slit open again. Whispering his name gently I can just make out the dark, cloudy blue of his irises as they move to look at me from out of the corner of his eye. Smiling gently I brush at his hair some more, whispering his name so lightly that I barely hear it escape from my lips. He blinks slowly at my softly spoken whisper, his head lifting to turn slightly in my direction, and I take the opportunity to gently slide my right hand out from under him. Smiling softly I use my now freed hand to brush at his bangs as his eyes threaten to close once more.

A small noise starts to emanate from the back of his throat as his eyes finally drift close again, his head turning to lie once more on the pillow, his breathing becoming even and shallow as sleep tries to reclaim him. After a few moments the soft sound fades to silence and smiling gently I brush at his bangs one last time before gently kissing his cheek and straightening up. Moving my previously discarded chair back to the side of his bed I sit down, taking his hand in my own and laying my head by his side so that his hand, captured in mine, rests lightly against my cheek.

Sighing I allow my eyes to close, pressing closer against Seto's captured hand, inhaling deeply of his unique musky sent that, although dampened by years of drugs and the sheer force of the atmosphere in the room, still carries with it memories. Memories that are both treasured and mourned by my heart.

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Sighing wearily I close the door to the Turtle Game Shop making sure that everything is locked up behind me as I make my way to the door that leads into the house portion of the building carelessly discarding my keys onto the counter as I pass by it.

I don't bother to turn on the lights as I quietly make my way through the residence, carefully stepping over the step that would otherwise moan loudly in protest as I make my way up the stairs, briefly checking in on Yugi's grandpa before going to my room and gathering clean pajamas, heading then to the bathroom and waiting until the door is closed firmly behind me before turning on the lights.

Tiredly shedding my clothes I step into the shower, turning my face up into the spray as the warm water starts to drum soothingly against my skin. Of all the modern inventions of this age this one had quickly won over my heart. The waters gentle fingers and caresses rarely failing to sooth the aches of the body and lull those of the soul.

As the warmth starts to fade away replaced instead by cold I reach out, turning off the water, all the weariness of earlier slowly beginning to resettle within me. Stepping out of the shower I briefly dry my hair with a towel before throwing the cloth in the hamper not bothering with the rest of me.

My pants cling lightly to my moistened skin and I hesitate briefly before setting my shirt on the counter as I turn, inevitably, to regard myself in the mirror.

Always the same. Frowning I bring my fingers up to brush softly over my lightly tanned skin, the light sheen of water that covers it only serving to enhance its subtle coppery undertones, before trailing up to the paler scare that rests on the junction of my neck and shoulder.

I'd never really like my skin tone, too light for the harsh desert sun that I had loved, such an oddity at that time. One of many that I possessed. But here, in this time, in this place I've found that many find it quite attractive.

Letting my hand fall to my side I twist slightly watching as smooth skin slides easily over lithely formed muscle, contemplating the slim shoulders and tampered waist. So slender..., more effeminate than masculine one would suppose.

Frowning I turn fully back to the mirror my eyes flickering up to my hair. Another oddity. Reaching up I finger a droopy spike of crimson-black thinking back to the few times that Seto had taunted me over its unusual color and tendency to spike out on its own before our...falling out. How Seto had scoffed at Yugi when he'd had his cut.

Closing my eyes I slip my shirt over my head. Yet another oddity...my eyes. Many find their crimson hue disconcerting, find themselves faltering under their gaze. But not Seto. Never Seto. He would just scowl and stand firm, challenging with his own oddly shaded orbs.

Sighing I glance one last time at my reflection; still that of a sixteen year old boy, never changing in the past nine years, before turning off the lights and padding quietly to my room.

Forever young, moderately attractive, if a bit slight in built, but still...

Still there is something which I am lacking. Which I have to be lacking. I know that I'm attractive to not only women but to men also, have had dozens of offers from both sexes, and yet Seto never once looked upon me as anything more than a rival.

I wish so much to hold favor in him as more than that. As a rival, as a friend... My only comfort in this regard I suppose...is that Seto never really showed favor towards anyone, regardless of their sex, in either a friendly relationship or a romantic one. Except of course towards Mokuba, whom he would die for... Has died for. Closing my eyes I bite my lip, quietly closing the door to my room as I step inside, leaning tiredly back against it.

At least for a while I was one of the very precious few whom he chose to show any regard for, even if it was only that of a rival, an enemy to be kept close, to be watched wearily from a distance and, if it suited him, protected...

Sighing I push away from the door, crawling to sit near the head of my bed and drawing my knees to my chest wrap my arms around them, resting my chin upon them, my toes sliding under the hem of my blankets.

Or perhaps it is not the present but the past which hinders me, a past which Seto refuses to acknowledge and accept.

Could it be that our transgressions run too deep, that the past, that our continued rivalry spurred by some unknown force to always face each other as rivals, perhaps Destiny, the Fates deem us to forever be together yet always apart, separated and tethered by invisible threads that bind us, that pull us inevitably to each other, but hold us back, just out of reach.

Puffing lightly at a stray lock of damp blonde hair that, having fallen forward, lightly tickled my nose I sigh, slowly unfurling my limbs, tiredly pushing my damp fringe back only to have it fall back into place, the multicolored spikes, still damp, futilely attempting to return to their usual state. Dwelling upon such things leads only to heartache and a migraine.

Reaching out for the cordless phone that lay atop the nightstand I hesitate for just a moment before dialing the number for Kaiba Corp. adding an additional four digit code to the end which connected me directly to a security program within Kaiba Corps. main computer system. After a soft beep the phone line went silent for a moment before a string of tones sounded and a computerized voice came on the line asking for my personal entry code, which after I entered, initialized a string of security checks that varied from voice identification to a number of different numerical codes which had to be entered manually and passwords which had to spoken, to random phrases that where once again used to check for voice validation.

The whole process is cumbersome, but unfortunately necessary. Due to the number of prank calls ranging from those claiming to be doctors that where better suited to threat Seto, to those whom claimed they worked at the hospital he was in who then would either claim Seto to have awoken or died, to those who issued threats, either to Mokuba or Seto and even people who had offered to pay for...sexual...privileges towards Seto. In the end Mokuba refused to take anymore calls from anyone he didn't know and built and installed this new security system, which only a select few could use. It is currently the only way anyone can contact him.

After the last security check is cleared and verified there is another short pause before the voice comes back online. "Good Evening Yami Mutou, what can we do for you?"

"I need to get in contact with Mokuba."

"Acknowledged. Just one moment please."

As the line once again becomes silent I slide my feet further under the hem of my covers and glancing down upon the nightstand's somewhat cluttered surface, my eyes come to rest on the photo of Seto from Mokuba's birthday, now faded and worn from years of handling. Resisting the urge to once again pick up that picture and trail my fingertips softly along the clean lines of Seto's face and body I force my attention back to the computerized voice of Kaiba Corps. main computer systems.

"We are sorry, but Mokuba Kaiba's personal phone and computer are not acknowledging our request. Would you like us to contact the establishment in which he and Yugi Mutou are currently staying?"

"Hai."

"Just one moment. Connection has been established and your call will now be routed directly to Mokuba Kaiba and Yugi Mutou's room. Please enter disconnection and logoff codes when you are done. Would you like us to remain on standby until that time or in case you will be in need of us again?"

"Iie."

"Acknowledged." With that silence once again filled the line before the soft ringing of the other end sounded and continued for a number of minutes before a light, slurred and obviously sleepy voice interrupted it. "Hello...?"

"Yugi?"

Faintly I hear the soft rustling of sheets, along with a few incoherent mumbles, as Yugi shifts his position. "Yami it's four am..."

Glancing quickly at my alarm clock I notice that it is indeed not four am, and so merely shrug into the empty room. I could never quite get these different time zone things right and thus Yugi will just have to continue to suffer. "Gomen ne Yugi, I didn't mean to wake you."

"Hmm.... Yami why are calling this late?" With that the sound of a thump and a softly whispered curse filled the air along with more rustling of sheets before a much more awake and slightly panicked Yugi came back on the line. "Is Seto alright? Nothing's happened has there?"

I'm about to answer when a sleepily drawled `Yugi... Who is it...?' sounds on the other end and after a moment Yugi's muffled voice fills the silence which is then quickly replaced by another thump and more cursing before Mokuba's voice filled the phone line restating Yugi's previous questions, though with a bit more panic in them.

Mentally picturing both Mokuba's and Yugi's ears held up to the phone I repress a small smirk, the unused expression feeling odd. "I'm sorry to wake you guys, and yes Seto's alright..." A soft whoosh of released air follows this statement, before both prompt me to continue. "Mokuba...he... He woke up."

Dead silence fills the air as Mokuba and Yugi take this in, processing the information.

Mokuba's voice shakes softly when he finally speaks, the beginnings of tears clear in his voice. "He...he woke up? When...? How...? Did he say anything? Did he do anything?"

Briefly I feel another pang of pain and soft jealously at the memory of the quiet and confused inquiry Seto had made towards Mokuba, perhaps without even knowing the reason behind his question. "Tonight, a few hours ago... He asked about you."

"He asked about me...?"

"Hai... The doctor said that they where going to run some tests on him later...after he's rested. They said that they don't think he suffered any severe damage from the accident, but..."

"But?" Yugi prompted softly after a prolonged silence.

"He... He has some memory problems. He didn't recognize me..." Biting my lower lip I berate myself for the trembling that had seeped into my voice and taking a calming breath continue, ignoring the softly spoken words on the other end. "They don't think that it's permanent though."

His voice shaking from tears and relief Mokuba came back on the line. "Yami, whatever needs to be done, do it. I don't think... I don't think it'll be possible for us to leave here before this deal is done without the whole thing falling through. Please look after Seto and tell him... Tell him I'm sorry that I wasn't there and that I love him.

"I will."

"We'll get there as soon as we're able to. Thank you Yami. Thank you."

After a few more words I go through the appropriate actions to disconnect and laying the phone back on the nighstand turn off the light, laying down and drawing my covers around me, settling into an uneasy sleep filled with shifting shadows and softly spoken whispers of words I wished not to hear, of silences accompanied by the embrace of strong arms that both chilled and warmed me. Dreams so long absent coming back to haunt me.

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Slightly embarrassed I brush my fingers gently over the delicate black petals of the rose I carry. It feels a bit awkward bringing the flowers to Seto now that he is conscious but at the same time it gives me a small measure of comfort when neither they nor I am rejected.

It's been about a week since Seto has first awakened. Mokuba and Yugi have yet to get back from their business trip, although they call every night to check on Seto; the worry and guilt in Mokuba's voice at his inability to be here is so profound that I can't help but feeling guilty myself. Guilty for being here when Seto awakened, for being jealous of their love and for nearly causing the most precious person in both our lives to be lost to us forever. Of what my betrayal had nearly cost... Hopefully it won't be too much longer before Mokuba can get here.

The tests that the doctors have been running on Seto have all been completed and analyzed, showing a few anomalies, but nothing the doctors said that should cause too much concern, for that I am thankful. And so for a week now I have continued to come to see Seto, regardless of the silence that embraces him like a shroud. A silence which unnerves and frightens me...

Pausing outside of his door I take a deep calming breath before quietly slipping inside the room. My gaze immediately wonders towards Seto who is sitting upright, his arms wrapped tightly around his drawn up knees on which his chin rests. As the door clicks softly closed behind me Seto's only reaction is to tilt his head slightly more to his left as he continues to gaze out of the window, his long, somewhat shaggy, dull hair falling forward to further obscure his eyes which are slightly lowered, his downcast expression one of quite confusion and sorrow.

The movement slight as it is also causes the collar of Seto's shirt to slip downwards, baring his right shoulder and slightly arched neck, the skin revealed far too pale, the clean lines of muscle which should be seen nearly completely vanished from years of lying still in one position, giving him an uncharacteristically frail appearance. I wonder if a nurse had to help him sit up like that or if, in his stubborn nature, he had done so himself. Sighing quietly I move to stand next to him absently setting the rose on the nightstand beside me.

"Seto..." Unsure I pause, Seto hasn't once spoken to me since the night he awakened, hasn't in fact, aside from a few whispered words in answer to some of the doctors questions, spoken to anyone. "How... How are you feeling?"

After a moment Seto's gaze glides briefly to look at me before his attention is once again drawn away to look out of the window at the slightly graying sky. Expecting, yet still hurt by the silence I allow my gaze to wonder over the room and it's contents, my gaze soon coming to rest upon the velvet petals of the rose I'd lain down not moments before. Hesitating briefly I reach out picking the delicate flower back up considering it's softly defined petals. Maybe...

"Here Seto, I brought this for you." I can feel a deep blush flare across my cheeks as Seto once again turns his gaze to look at me and then at the rose which I held out in offering. This is the first time I've ever offered the roses directly to him, preferring instead to simply place them by his side or on the nightsand by his bed. "They are your favorite..."

I trail off as Seto reaches tentatively out towards the rose, the sleeve of his shirt sliding down his arm as his long, pale fingers close around the stem and I can't help but flinching at the reminder of the thinness and fragility that has settled into Seto's build. After smelling the rose, his lips brushing lightly over the petals, Seto once again wraps his arms around his legs, but this time his gaze doesn't wonder to the window but lingers on me, his eyes if possible reflecting an even deeper sense of sadness.

"Who are you?"

His voice is so soft and quiet that at first I'm not sure if the words where really spoken or if they where imagined. His lightly questing eyes however prompt me to answer him, part of me rejoicing in the fact that he asked me a question and the other shattered at the question he asked. "My name's Yami. We...used to be friends..."

"Used to be?"

Agitation mixing with sadness I fidget and turn my gaze away from Seto's so that I don't have to face him directly. "We had a falling out."

"Why?"

Biting my lip I glance briefly back at Seto before once again looking off to one side, my voice trembling slightly as I spoke. "I...I did something that I shouldn't have. Something that you could not forgive me for."

His lashes lowering Seto turns slightly away from me, his gaze distant as he contemplates what I've told him. Then in that quiet, soft voice, slightly muffled by the tops of his knees he whispers. "There's someone... Someone important to me, but I can't remember..." He sobs quietly at the last, his right hand raising to grab a handful of his hair, his head lowering to hide his face further in the folds of his arms and knees.

As both relief and confusion pass through me I close my eyes. While I'm grateful for the change in subject, this new one confuses me. I can't imagine who Seto might be talking about, the only person coming to mind being Mokuba, but Seto had asked about him...

"Mokuba...?"

My eyes snap open at Seto's quiet whisper, the realization that I must have spoken the name aloud sending little tendrils of embarrassment and guilt snaking through me. "Mokuba..., your little brother."

"Mokuba..." Seto repeats softly, thoughtfully, before shaking his head in a barely perceived `no'. Quiet fills the room for a few minutes as Seto lapses into silence, his brow furrowing slightly as he contemplates his own thoughts, his eyes slowly wondering back to rest upon me.. "What was it...that you did? That I couldn't forgive?"

At the sudden shift back to our previous conversion I stiffen, freezing as fear starts to fill me. Fear at his rejection should I tell him the truth filling my heart and yet knowing at the same time that I cannot lie to him. "I... I..."

"Seto!"

Startled I turn at the same time Seto's eyes snap to the doorway, our gazes landing upon Mokuba who stood just inside the doorway and Yugi who lingered just behind. For a moment complete silence hung in the air before Mokuba called out Seto's name again and rushing into the room embraced Seto in a hug crying incoherent words. As Seto's attention is drawn away from me I back up, passing Yugi as he goes to Mokuba's side trying to calm the younger Kaiba down. I keep backing up until I'm out of the room and turning I lean back against the wall, my hand coming up to cover my mouth as shame fills me. Shame at the sense of relief I feel for not telling Seto and a sudden sense of self-loathing at the knowledge that I can't tell him. That I won't tell him, not unless he asks... I can't... I can't…