Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Paradise City ❯ Remembering Past Memories ( Chapter 3 )

Paradise City by: Angela (orangeaura868)

"Welcome to Paradise City!"

That's what Jou had told him. Ryou thought that it was just some name made by the orphans here to bring hope for their few remaining years here before they could leave…little did he know how much it truly described this place filled with colorful lights, and night life.

In truth the name of the place was weighing the least on his mind. The issue that he was focusing on was Jou…his behavior…is this what people nowadays consider normal? Ryou hadn't been out much and in fact hated being out with so many close-minded stressed out people…but he still remembered that asking someone these things was most definitely rude. It was unheard of. You simply don't ask someone these things and if you did you should have gotten to know them or at least given them fair warning.

What had that meant then? Out of the blue…what's your sexual preference? Surely information such as this was not important when living temporarily in an orphanage however much they make you forget where you are and what you've been through.

Yet…it hadn't mattered in the least. Jou didn't seem like the most mannerly person out there, that was a given…but Ryou was already off and away thinking back on the flood of old memories.

When he had asked…Ryou had started thinking, and suddenly the floodgate was thrown aside and the torrents of sensations and feelings all were back. How could he have forgotten this? Still, he hadn't lost them at all…simply not taking each memory into consideration and storing them in the far recesses of his mind. But no…he had not forgotten them. They were still there…fresh and crisp the feel of spinning and twirling and emotions of being carefree and loved…bliss.

Ryou withdrew himself from his reminiscing and went back to unloading all his belongings into what he presumed was the guest bedroom. It was near the front of the house actually…and on the first floor too but Ryou was far from caring…he was running through the gardens among the myriad of dazzling colors dodging landscaping stones and laughing as he ran to keep up with Malik.

They were only in flashes of course…vibrant flashes of rainbows and smiles and those eyes…those soft lavender eyes that he felt graced to behold. Ignore the rude prying questions from society…thank them even…they had brought back something his soul had so painstakingly stowed away so it may not cause him pain. In this time and in this place where he had lost everything and had found no comfort in even sharing his pain…those memories became more pleasure then they could ever be pain.

Drawing himself back and moving almost mechanically back and forth hanging shirts up and clearing out suitcases…bitter pleasure. The visions themselves were pure bliss while coming back to reality made them bitter and Ryou felt like crying.

He held himself back like so many times before. Who was he kidding? Even with the psychologist…Natalie had not helped at all. He was still the sad lonely teen with not a soul to find comfort in. Be realistic now…those dancing people out there…they had no idea his pain. Sure…they were orphans themselves…but they were social people while he was avoidant and drawn back.

They would never see the true him because he was…he didn't know who he was or why they would never know him…that memory was gone for real now and he couldn't fathom why he had never thrown off the mask. The feeling of being all alone and never being real to them and having no one understand you…it had him in a sinking depression.

He had heard say that depression was anger with enthusiasm…then what, pray tell, was he so angry at? He had thought that sometimes things were done so often that eventually the reason for doing it was forgotten. One example he could think of right now was scaring someone to get rid of the hiccups…ask anyone now and they would most likely be clueless to why it was done…they do it and go along with it. Hiccups were random contractions of the diaphragm…and scaring someone might equalize the contractions…but it was still good enough to prove his point.

"I'm thinking too much again." He whispered into the dark room. The colors of his beautiful memories faded into the neon lights of the City. The bright fluorescent colors filtered in and added an air of happiness into the dark room.

It was always night when this happened…always this black time when no one was there that he would be so depressed. Being with company gave him a reason to be happy…or act happy enough to even convince yourself you were truly happy and laughing and smiling a real smile. When he was alone…the sturdy columns holding him up all crumbled down and he was depressed all over again. The energy was gone…and the enthusiasm left as well.

It added even more separation from him and the partying crowd outside. It was late…and he was tired…his feet were sore from wandering the airports and he lacked sleep. Ryou shoved his still packed luggage in a corner before collapsing onto the bed seeking relaxing sleep and surrendering all emotion as the darkness came and binded itself over him…shielding him from the outside world. He moved to pull the covers over his head and threw all his worries to the new days.

He still had so much time left for everything else…later.

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A/N: Ooooo…angsty depressed Ryou. I'm sorry that this chapter is so short but I wanted to post something. I'm also sorry I haven't been updating ever since I first published this. The thing is that I only started this as a story to HELP me…I was stuck on Reason to Live and now I'm not quite so stuck anymore. That's not to mean that I'm giving up because…I'm not. This story might even become more popular once I introduce some characters.

I apologize for having so many thoughts in their…but I felt like writing that and I did. I was originally supposed to write in Marik but I don't feel like doing that now. Nothing really happened in this chapter…gee…reoccurring theme huh? Lately all my newest chapters have been filler chappies. Sorry.

Review, anyway!

PS Tell me whom you would like Marik to be with in the next chapter…can't be Malik since he's needed later! Can't be Jou either since he went `home'. I was thinking Seto…or maybe …oh yeah! Can't be Bakura either! Tell me who should be with Marik!

It's not going to be permanent though…just for next chapter!

I'd like to thank my reviewers: Elle-Fate2x1-2, Chaos and Death, hyperunenthusiastic12yearoldonasugarhigh, spawndude252, syclike, and Lavender Insanity, and ………!

Till next time…Ja!