Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Potholes in Tokyo II ❯ Chapter Two ( Chapter 2 )

Potholes in Tokyo II

Chapter Two - The Tortilla Chip Man

AN: Thanks to the… four… of you who reviewed. Yaysies to you! Daisuki yo, Futomi-chan! Me wuvs ya! Su!

Umm… let's see what happens next!

"So, umm... can I stay with you people?" Malik asked, after he had spilled his grief-stricken tale of woe.

"Sure, you can!" Yuugi said without thinking. Yuugi clapped a hand over his mouth, looking very embarrassed and cute.

Yami grinned. It didn't really matter, since the boy practically had full run of the hose anyway. "I… I suppose you can… but only for a little while," Yami declared, as if it had been his own idea.

"Domo arigatou," Malik said, bowing respectfully.

The look-alikes blinked, looked at each other, and then burst out laughing.

"Mwahahahahahahahahah!"

Yuugi wisely stifled his giggles when Yami was hit in the head with a speeding ice cream sandwich. "So, um, Malik…" Yuugi began, stepping over Yami's unconscious form. "How about we get you a room set up?"

*~*

Marik stared listlessly at all the children surrounding him. He was supposed to be shooting yet another episode of Marik the Dinosaur, but his mind kept going back to his beloved ice cream man, Malik. Ah, how he loved his Malik-uke…

"Marik the dinosaur?" a child called.

"Nani?" he barked, not caring that he'd used his `you're-a-stupid-child, leave-me-alone' voice.

"Eek! I… I w-was just saying… the Tortilla Chip Man is ringing the d-doorbell!" Marik stood, knocking many children, fruit snacks, and inanimate objects over with his tail in the process. He growled as he stalked over to the door. He had never particularly like the `Tortilla Chip Man', who was in fact an Egyptian man named Rishido, an extremely over-possessive cousin of Malik's. Rishido would undoubtedly be very angry with him for yelling at Malik…

"Hello, Tortilla Chip Man," he muttered irritably, allowing the man with a sombrero on his head to enter the room.

"Look little children! I have nachos for youuuuuuuu!" Rishido said in a singsong voice, throwing his hat to the floor and retrieving a basket of nachos from atop his head.

"Yaaaaaay! Thank you very much, Tortilla Chip Man!" all the children cried in unison.

"But maybe next time, you shouldn't put the food on your head. Mommy says you shouldn't play with food."

"Yeah, that's what mommy says."

"Really?" one child asked, really getting into the whole `I'm-an-annoying-chatterbox' personality that all the children seemed to display. "My daddy says that if I play with my food, Santa Claus won't come to our house, because only bad boys and girls play with their food."

"Hontou ni? What did Santy Claws bring you last year?"

"A toy train!" a boy cried, making train noises for emphasis.

"Well, I got a dolly. She opens and shuts her eyes, and says `Mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy--' "

"What did you get from Santa Claus last year, Marik the Dinosaur? Did you get any good toys?"

"THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS SANTA CLAUS! …AND HE DOESN'T MAKE THE KIND OF TOYS I LIKE!"

Rishido's eyes bulged until they were about to pop out of his head, while the children all backed away and began loudly eating their nachos.

"Is Malik depriving you?" Rishido asked, retrieving his sombrero from the floor.

"Sort of…" Marik sniffed, looking at the floor.

"How can he `sort of' deprive you…?"

"I yelled at him because I thought he was flirting with this punk with dice earrings, and then he ran away… that was yesterday, and I haven't seen him since…" Marik broke into sobs, crying on Rishido's shoulder.

"You hurt my Malik-chan!?" Rishido yelled. "I told him you'd only hurt him, but he wouldn't listen! …he was a lovesick fool, ne?"

"Waaaaah!" Marik bawled, tears streaming from pretty violet eyeballs.

"Oh, there, there," Rishido said, patting the dinosaur's shoulder awkwardly. "I'm sure you two will be able to work out your problems. You always do."

"You… you really think so?" Marik asked, wiping his nose on the plush arm of his dinosaur suit.

"Well, either that or you're screwed over and Malik will never speak to you again!" Rishido said brightly, eyes sparkling.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

*~*

Malik and Yuugi explored upstairs on their noble quest to find a room for Malik. So far, all the rooms had either been `too large', `not enough light', or `not enough room for an ice cream trolley'. Yuugi tried the second to last door in the hall, which he had never actually opened before, but that he assumed contained a spare bedroom.

Yuugi slammed the door shut as quickly as he had opened it. It was a broom closet… a broom closet containing Anzu the butler and a very confused pizza delivery man named Uncle Ingrid, Jr. The two had been doing something that would probably leave emotional scars on poor little Yuugi for the rest of his life.

"AAAAAAAAAH!" Yuugi screeched, pounding down the stairs and immediately jumping into Yami's arms.

"Daijoubo ka, Yuugi?" Yami asked, still a little out of it from being hit with the ice cream sandwich.

"A-Anzuuuuuuuuuu…"

"ANZU, YOU'RE FIRED!" Yami yelled.

Malik tromped down the stairs, staring at Yuugi's sudden display of affection for Yami. "I don't think that fuzzy apricot girl would care even if she could hear you… but I DID finally find a room!" the blonde added brightly.

Yuugi, still very disturbed from what he had seen the Anzu doing, fainted in Yami's arms.

*~*

Yami stared at the face of a sleeping angel. Bangs of liquid gold framed the boy's innocent face. A slight blush suffused the pure one's cheeks, breaths coming in and out of slightly parted lips. Yami edged closer, staring into the visage from mere inches away.

"PHARAOH!" Bakura screeched. Yami twitched, but was slightly happier when he saw his Yuugi still sleeping peacefully. The insane chef appeared in the living room, brandishing a pink umbrella and a venomous glare at his employer.

"YOU BAKA! WHAT'S THAT ICE CREAM SALESMAN DOING SLEEPING ON MY BED!?"

Yuugi stirred, stretching and yawning. Bakura spared the boy a moment to glare at him before continuing his tirade.

"HOW DARE YOU LET HIM GO INTO MY PRIVATE QUARTERS WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!? YOU STUPID, IGNORANT, INCORRIGIBLE PHARAOH!"

"I love you too, Tomb Robber," Yami murmured, voice dripping with sarcasm. "You talk like I let him grope you or something…" Yami shivered, apparently not at all pleased with the mental images that had popped up.

"Oh, shut up, Baku. The poor kid's lover-- you know, that fruity dinosaur guy-got mad and yelled at him. You remember what happened between you and Ryou, don't you?" Yami asked, smirking at the chef.

Bakura stared at the floor in shame, disgrace, and regret-either that or he found the rug to be interesting, but that's unlikely. "Fine, Pharaoh-baka. But as soon as he wakes up, HE'S GETTING OUT OF MY ROOM!"

Yami, who (used to the patterns of Bakura's mental outbursts) had smartly covered his ears, tried to comfort the near-deaf Yuugi. "Oww," Yuugi whined, jamming his fingers in his ears (too little, too late, ne?) and bestowing his best attempt at a glare upon Bakura.

"BAKUUUUUUU-CHAAAAAAAAAAN!" came a voice from the foyer. Bakura, having quickly forgotten all previous engagements (except for the one with Ryou… mou), rushed to greet his fiancée.

"Ryou-itooshi, how I love you soooooooo!" he cried happily, throwing his arms around his silver-haired tenshi. "I missed you," he said, giving Ryou the puppy dog eyes.

"I was only gone eight hours, Baku-chan…" Ryou said in his sugary-sweet tone.

"But it felt like an eternity, for my heart would stop beating if not for your heart's charity!" Bakura cried poetically.

"Err… right. Ai shiteru mo," he said, blushing as he stood on tiptoe to kiss Bakura on the cheek.

"Kawaiiiiiiiii!" Malik squealed happily (he had, as most of the characters do at some point or other, suddenly appeared in the living room with no explanation of how or why. Why ask why?), glomping onto the two bishies.

"Eek!" Ryou squeaked as he overbalanced, and the three crashed onto the floor. Bakura landed on the bottom and Malik on top, with Ryou sandwiched unhappily in the middle.

"GET OFF MY RYOU, YOU FIEND!" Bakura yelled, pushing Malik to the side. Ryou wriggled over to the corner, blushing profusely. "You, Mister Ice Cream Man, must be one of the many who try to steal my Ryou away from me! You may try, but you shall never succeed! My Ryou loves me and I love my Ryou! I SHALL PREVAIL!"

They all sweat-dropped. Ryou got up, dragging Bakura into the kitchen as he said, "C'mon Bakura, honey, let's get you your medicine…"

"But I don't WAAAAAANT my medicine," Bakura whined to no avail. "Waaaaaaah…"

Malik stared at the kitchen door as it swung behind the two sort-of albino people. "I wonder what's on TV!" Malik hopped up on the couch between Yami and Yuugi, grabbing the remote from Yami's hand. "Eww, Teletubbies," Malik muttered with distaste. "Marik always hated the Teletubbies; they're his biggest competitors. But it DOES prove once and for all that children's shows with gay cast members get better ratings, ne? Oh, sugoi! Jerry Springer!"

Malik and Yuugi stared intently at the TV screen. Yami hoped for Malik's sake that the broadcast was censored. If his Yuugi were to hear all those wordy-dirties… Malik would wake up with his head disconnected from his body…

…but which one?

AN: Mou! Wow, I actually got this finished today! I surprise myself sometimes… actually, I surprise myself a lot…

Monkey bread tastes great! …no, it doesn't have monkeys in it… I don't eat monkeys. But I'm afraid that if I eat any more, I'll get so fat I fall down go BOOM!... Or maybe not. Mou.

Please review! ^_~

Kissy kissy to Futomi-chan!