Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Simple ❯ I Understand ( Chapter 15 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: YamiYugiPuzzleshipper2 
Anime/Manga: Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 09.01.2014 | Pages: 14 | Words: 10.8K | Visits: 96 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 09.01.2014 | Pages: 14 | Words: 10.8K | Visits: 96 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: I do not own
anything relating to Yu-Gi-Oh
Note: Story will be updated every Wednesday
Warning: TONS of cursing throughout story
Lemon Warning: Semi-dark lemon. SOME Season 0 Yami is involved in it.If you want to skip the lemon, don't read past the statement "I say we fuck the memories out of my head" until you reach the statement "Leave". If you don't think you're going to remember that, use F and Ctrl and type both phrases in, then delete the first phrase when you come up to it and use the Find function to get to the second part where the lemon is finished.
Lemon Note: The lemon actually serves a MAJOR purpose in this chapter and later in story.
Season 0 Yami Warning: Season 0 Yami makes an appearance for some of chapter.
Insanity Warning: Brief considerations that character is going insane. Nothing too graphic.
Drinking Warning: Underage drinking is indulged at gay bar.
Rape Attempt Warning: Not too graphic. Mostly just a conversation turned wrong and a fight.
Implied Sex Warning: Nothing graphic.
Chapter XV: I Understand
What the actual fuck?
Ra, did he always have to have such bad timing?
Couldn't he justoncepick a good fucking time to show up unannounced?
Yami still couldn't move the blade away from his mouth, eyes wide and unblinking, owlish in expression and looking somewhat shocked, and Ambassador Aknamkanon had his eyes narrowed into a furious glare, his dark gray-brown eyes seeming to bore into his skin with shock.
It was kind of comical in a dark sense.
And that was exactly why he nearly burst out laughing.
Apple juice splattered from the blade like blood and if Yami were an apple, he would have been worried. But those red eyes, owlish and unblinking and so stunned, with that knife and an apple slice he had his mouth open to bite into, that was hilarious.
Oh the other hand…Ambassador Aknamkanon? Not so much.
"Oh, is this the little slut?" he growled.
And Yugi backed up with wide eyes, because that voice, that tone, made his skin crawl and now there were pieces falling into place. Oh holy shit, Seto wasn't kidding when he said that Yami's father was the one who put him in the hospital.
"Father, if you touch him, I will be forced to take action," Yami muttered, taking his slice of apple and suddenly going back into motion, licking the blade clean of juice as the ambassador approached Yugi slowly. "That's your only warning."
And the ambassador stopped short and slowly turned his head, a small bit of fear in his eyes. And Yugi had to wonder what the fuck he had to fear from Yami when the boy hadn't been able to stop him before.
Yami made a purring noise and licked off some more juice left behind by his other apple slice, looking at his father pointedly. It was enough to make Yugi shiver in fear and his father stay as he was, frozen. When he got up, his father backed up a step as the taller teen strode towards him, pointing the knife lazily towards his heart. "I think it's about time you hit the road before something we regret were to happen, don't you?" He pressed the tip against his clothing and his father paled before backing up a step; Yami gestured towards the door, sliding the knife up and down his torso, muttering, "I can list off your vital organs. And I can stab through them like butter. It'd be fun, father. Want to play? You have five minutes to get the fuck out of my house before I do it."
For a moment he didn't answer or even move.
"I think maybe I'll split your stomach open first. Let your intestines fall out." He made a swiping motion with the knife before humming and then pressing it just above the belt, moving it as he continued listing off organs. "Here is your spleen–not really vital, but it's still there. Your liver–you know it's the only organ that regenerates? Pancreas–not vital, but it could be fun to cut out–"
And then the ambassador turned and strode towards the door with what little dignity he had left while Yami watched him with sharp eyes, waving the knife at him.
"Bye. Remember to bring a better conversation topic next time. I'm rather bored with the current."
As soon as he was gone, Yami rounded on Yugi, pointing the knife at him for a moment, studying him before turning away and tossing it onto the table with a small backwards glance at the wood. "Yugi, what the hell are you even doing here?" he murmured, and he sounded so tired it was amazing he had even just done what he did.
Yugi opened his mouth, not to answer but to ask if he was okay, but never got the words out because Yami spun around and suddenly grabbed him, pulling him straight into him. Yugi stumbled against him, the Puzzle hard as it hit his stomach, and moaned as Yami's mouth moved against his and a tongue sought his as a playmate.
His hands unconsciously grabbed at his arms to steady himself because the Puzzle in his abdomen kind of hurt. It was a lot sharper in edges than he had originally thought. It had looked a little blunt from where he was standing a few seconds ago, but now he knew the edges were like razors, that the flat sides were sharp where they joined. And the chain was so thick…
Honestly, how the fuck had Yami even managed to not notice when he got his fingers caught?
But holy fuck, the Puzzle was burning. It burned through his shirt and left his stomach searing, not with pain but with a strange sense of accomplishment, perhaps?
Either way, it burned and left him feeling warm and strange and so…oddly wonderful. It was one of those moments where he could melt into something without even really caring that he shouldn't.
And he knew he shouldn't, because this seemed like one of those times where he was supposed to push Yami away, to put some distance between them, but he wanted this just as badly as he did.
He wanted a distraction and that was what Yami sought too.
Otherwise, this wouldn't be happening.
"I say we fuck the memories out of my head," Yami growled against his lips when he pulled back to breathe some, mouth still extremely close to Yugi's.
Yugi laughed and nodded vigorously, gazing into hooded red eyes that seemed to bleed with the darkness of their pupils, that off-colored tint of blackish-gray swirling and discoloring them further. "Sounds like a plan."
Yami snatched his arm and led the way eagerly upstairs where Yugi was promptly thrown onto a mattress with a plush red comforter and what seemed like a million pillows.
"My mom likes to buy pillows," he muttered as an explanation when Yugi literally pulled away from him to twist his head around and look at them all, eyes wide; when he looked back Yami was giving him an impatient look.
And just as Yugi was about to get his jacket off, the phone started ringing.
"Ignore it," Yami breathed against his mouth as his hips ground into Yugi's; so he did, grabbing at Yami's shoulders as he slipped the jacket off and prepared to take his shirt off, only to stop short when the ringing did not stop. In fact, the more they ignored it and the longer it rang, the louder it got.
Yugi pulled away slightly to look at the little white device and a growl of "Yugi" made him turn back long enough to bunch Yami's shirt up in his hands and pull it over his head as the taller teen wanted.
"Fucking–Yami, I can't think with that stupid thing droning on and on like that!" he cried, annoyed.
Yami let out a snarl of pure rage and then snatched it from where it was charging before barking, "What the fuck do youwant, Bakura?"
Yugi went bug-eyed when Yami pressed harder into him while undoing the belts on his pants with only one hand, glaring at the device in his hand and slipping the rest of his clothes off while Bakura said whatever it was he was saying.
"I don't know," he snapped, "tomorrow maybe? Look, can't help you. I have to go."
Yugi was startled when Yami gave him a look and gestured for him to get his clothes off, hurrying to abide by his wishes as fast as he possibly could. He was stripping of his own pants and boxers when Yami spoke again.
"I said I have to–because I'm trying to fuck Yugi, damn it!"
Yugi's mouth fell open as Yami hung up, putting the phone back in place and turning to him again with a wide smirk.
"We…really need to work on your censorship," the smaller boy muttered before shaking his head in a daze and quickly pulling his clothes off the rest of the way, watching as Yami twisted off him to let him get the jeans off and throw them down on the floor.
"You should work on yours," Yami replied gruffly as he got between his legs again, a finger entering him before he could even think straight.
Yugi snorted. "It never works."
"Admittedly, I've never tried it, but whatever. I could have censored if I wanted to."
Yugi let out another snort. "Right, Yami."
"I could. I haven't exactly cursed around you nearly as much as you do me," he responded–or at least he didn't think he did…did he? Yami thought back for a moment and then rolled his eyes before pressing a second finger inside of him.
"…Yeah, that's probably true," the smaller boy admitted around a loud mewl.
He pressed a third finger into him and Yugi squirmed because this seemed a lot faster than the normal pace but he was okay with that–he was, but holy fuck, he wasn't used to being prepped so quickly.
"Tell me something Yugi."
It sounded simple and casual enough a statement, but his next words tore that up completely.
"How do the others fuck you?"
He blinked wide eyes and moaned when Yami pressed into him almost immediately after taking his fingers away, baring his teeth next to his ear, growling softly. "Do they pound you? Or is it one of those slow and steady things? I bet I can do it better."
Yugi squirmed, surprised, shocked, and so turned on it hurt like all hell. His hand shot up to grab at Yami's hair, moaning softly once before bucking wildly against his penis, striking a bubble of need and control that burst inside of the taller teen.
"Maybe you pound them," Yami said softly before gliding his right canine over his soft baby-fat cheek, nipping with his bottom canine and pulling slightly before baring his teeth against his ear and growling loudly, the noise making him tremble and move faster. "Do they tie you up? I bet you've been cuffed a couple of times. Maybe even participated in a threesome? Hmm…"
Yugi grabbed at his shoulder and exposed his neck for Yami to nip at. One of the soft bites made him yelp and squirm, eyes widening in surprise as he realized Yami had broken skin.
"I wonder how many marks you've been given…"
When Yami suddenly pulled back and bared his teeth at him, Yugi blinked a few times, startled by the action and definitely caught off guard by the fact that he was no longer filled, hissing in annoyance. "Well?" Yami spat at him, his teeth gleaming with a small bit of his blood and tons of saliva mixed with the natural lighting the window fed the room. "Tell me."
Yugi wasn't exactly sure why he decided that he was going to manipulate Yami into giving him exactly what he wanted, but that was what he ended up doing. "They fuck me hard and fast and they pound me into the mattress until I'm too tired to even breathe," he hissed back, smirking when the taller boy's lip curled back slightly. "I fuck them until they can't walk anymore. And I honestly don't think youcoulddo better than them."
Yami grabbed him hard, fingertips definitely going to leave bruises, roughly pushing him further into the pillows with the force of the lunge, snapping his hips forward and making him cry out in surprise at the intrusion.
Yugi tried to press his lips against his again but Yami turned his face away each time, sometimes burying it into his neck and licking at the bite mark he had left while never once faltering in his too-fast-too-hard thrusts. But even with his nails digging into his shoulder, and his hand ripping at his hair, the smaller boy managed to meet him thrust for thrust, moaning loudly and bordering on screaming when his prostate was struck.
It seemed the faster and harder Yami snapped his hips inside him, the higher Yugi's legs wrapped around his back, and the further up the bed they moved, because, not even five minutes into it, Yugi's head hit the bed's headboard and he pressed hard against it while the pillows fell and hit the ground soundlessly from either side.
Yugi wasn't sure what he was doing at first, but the change of position–the smallest, tiniest turn of his body, his face leaving his neck–made his eyelids flicker and his eyes shoot open wide in shock; Yami pressed his hand against the board and then slipped it up to the top, not bothering with the other which held his hips down against the mattress.
The bed was squeaking and it was a little irritating, but Yugi could ignore it, especially when Yami lowered his eyes towards his and narrowed them into slits, not once bothering to slow his pace.
The sound of skin slapping and the glistening sheen of sweat on their bodies and the moaning and borderline screams made it a lot harder than either of them had anticipated when it came to lasting.
But, on the plus side, the coils snapped in them both at the same time. Yami throbbed and emptied out in him while his own came in thick ribbons and coated them both; the taller teen pressed his forehead into the headboard, breathing hard.
Fuck, Yugi's legs felt like jelly and he was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to sit for at least a week…
He'd need one of those donut things–inflation tubes…
"Where…thefuck…d idthat…come from?" Yugi hissed, panting and looking at him with wide eyes; Yami gave him a single look before closing his eyes and going back to steadying his breathing, shaking his head slightly.
Well, fuck, was that what happened when Yami got curious about his other–very fake–fuck buddies? Ooh.
Well, that could work in his favor.
"Holy shit…I think I fucking love you right now."
Yami didn't react like he thought he would. He had expected him to laugh, but instead he was met with a cold, cruel sneer. "Right."
"I was referring to your dick, Yami," he snapped.
Yami rolled his eyes and shook his head. "We can't do this shit anymore."
Yugi didn't bother pointing out that he didn't pull away even as he said this, that he didn't pull out, that his flaccid penis was still very much inside him. "Oh, bullshit, Yami. It's not my fault you misinterpreted."
"Yugi, shut up already. I'm really not in the mood to hear whatever the fuck you want to say. Obviously the idea of us ever being together is your hard limit. If you're so fucking terrified–"
"Hard limit?" Yugi asked, laughing once. "This isn't some kind of BDSM experiment because you sure as fuck would not be my dominant."
"You know, you joke about every little thing you can get your fucking hands on, Yugi, but this isn't a fucking joke to me. It's a slap in the fucking face."
Yugi grimaced. "Yami, I'm–"
"Shut up."
"Would you just give me a second to explain?"
"Why should I listen to anything you say anymore?" the red-eyed teen spat, shaking his head but still not moving away. "You say and imply enough."
"I–I didn't think before I said it. That's all."
"Yugi, whether the fuck it was in the moment or not, the tone of your voice and the look in your eyes said it all. So, don't worry. I'll find a way to get over you."
Yugi opened and closed his mouth but ended up closing his eyes after a moment as well, chewing his cheek thoughtfully.
"I don't want to be fucking used anymore," Yami said suddenly, making him open his eyes and stare at a pair of red that blazed right through him. "It's pathetic and I feel like shit every time."
"I'm not using you!" Yugi protested. "In fact, you're the one who tops most often. If anyone is using the other, it's you usingme!"
Yami bared his teeth for a moment before looking away again. "I wonder if they all feel like this afterwards," he muttered under his breath.
Yugi was about to say they all probably felt like they fucking rocked his world or had theirs rocked, but then reconsidered as he really didn't want to fucking deal with it anymore, feeling sick to his stomach with the pain that radiated off the taller teen. And then he felt disgusting because the only thought that crossed his mind was nothing of an apology but came out as a sneer ofWell, you're the only one so I guess they all do.
And that was something that he had to be ashamed of because it was sowrong.
"You know, you're blowing this out of proportion. It was just playful pillow talk," Yugi found himself complaining before he really thought it through, going bug-eyed when Yami turned his head and seemed to breathe hard through his nose before closing his eyes and shaking his head.
"I'm so done with this bullshit. I'm done putting up with all the shit you put me through, Yugi. I'm so sorry that you apparently seem to beallergicto even the word love, but it has nothing to do with me and everything to do with you. For a while there I was convinced it was me, but it's allyou!" he spat, glaring and baring his teeth. "I admit that sometimes I overreact to some things but I'm pretty sure you would be reacting the same way if you were in my shoes."
"But I'm smart and that's why I'mnotin your fucking shoes, Yami, because I didn't let myself get attached!" Yugi yelled.
"What the fuck iswrongwith you?" Yami growled softly. "You tell me I don't know what love is, but doyou?"
"Look, I don'tneedyou telling me how big of an asshole I am, Yami. I am well aware, okay?" Yugi spat.
"Don't get fucking smartass with me, idiot. Ra fucking–did your mom and dad slam your goddamned head in a solid oak door when you were a baby?"
He was hissing and Yugi was glaring, but both of them were hardening.
"The saying is dropping a child on its head–"
"I am not so stupid that I don't know that! I am just more fucking original than that."
Yugi made a scoffing noise and then shook his head. "You wish you were above the rest of us, don't you?"
"Don't fucking mess with me right now, Yugi."
"Ha, but isn't that what you've been doing to me this entire time, Yami? Are you too good to have it thrown back in your–" The cry that left his lips sounded almost akin to a scream but not quite there, not that Yami wanted that anyways; he had sensitive ears as it was. He didn't need Yugi's loud pitch to completely screw him over later. Yugi shot him a furious look. "That's dirty, Yami."
Yami sneered at him but didn't say anything for a long minute. "I think we might have ruined my bedspread."
That had to be the weirdest thing Yugi had ever heard in his life.
Yami had liked that color.
"Oh well." When he jerked backwards and pulled Yugi with him, the smaller boy yelped in surprise at the sudden falling sensation, grabbing at him with wide eyes before letting out a small breath of relief that was barely audible to even him as Yami steadied them so that he was sitting back on his knees with Yugi straddling his lap.
Yugi was tired, yes, but not enough to miss out on the sensation of Yami pulling him up to drive him back down just as fast, the movements making him hiss and moan as he grabbed at his shoulders harder with his nails.
But the studious light to the red eyes said that Yami knew about his little fear of falling, and that was why those lips were pulled back smugly as his movements continued. He wasn't laughing at him, but he was saying that Yugi should have known better than to think he would let him fall.
Yugi's heart squeezed a little, pain burning through the pleasure for a split second, but it was gone just as fast when nails bit in his shoulder blade and he let out a yelp that blended into a moan that eventually bled into a chain of scarcely-spaced mewls that seemed to bounce off the walls around them.
He leaned forward, buried his face in his neck, clamped down around him, back arching like a cat's, nails digging into his arms, rocking harder and faster until finally the coil snapped again. He collapsed into the worn out red-eyed boy who just barely kept from falling over by grabbing the bed cover as tightly as he could. His hand slowly reached up to rub at Yugi's back for a moment, closing his eyes and breathing hard.
And it wasn't until twenty minutes had passed that Yami finally let go of him and growled, "I was serious earlier" as he pushed Yugi back against the mattress, pulling away and out of him in one swift motion, giving him a somewhat bitter and cynical look. "I don't want to be used anymore. And I won't use you either."
Yugi gave him a startled, slightly hazed look before opening his mouth.
"Leave."
"What?" he choked, eyes wide.
Yami glanced at him as he got up to grab the Puzzle off the nightstand where he found that the bottom had been touching the bed; why this bothered him so much, he wasn't certain, but it did. "I said you have to leave."
"Oh, no, Iheardthat," Yugi hissed. "But what the fuck–"
"I'm not using you and you're not using me either. I'm tired of it. I've lost all passion for it. But then…that always happens, right? When things are one-sided? When they're just forfun?" Yami narrowed his eyes into slits, the gleam of the sunlight making them look almost predatory. "Someone always gets bored, Yugi. Because that's human nature. We get bored with our toys."
Yugi opened and closed his mouth and then stared some more.
"I'll give you twenty minutes to get out. After that, if you're not gone, I'm going to throw you out on your ass for everyone to see," he spat before turning and walking off into the bathroom, shutting and locking the door.
He turned on the water but listened for Yugi moving outside the door, heard him grabbing his clothes, grabbing what he guessed was the towel from the sink out there, turning on the water and then walking off. He couldn't hear him get dressed, not that he would have regardless with the water on. But he did hear the door when it opened and closed again, not even a slam of a noise.
Yami breathed hard when he lay back against the door, groaning softly. He was so tired. In all honesty, he was surprised he even got that far in their little rendezvous. And he shouldn't have gotten turned on by that argument. Arguments with Yugi had never turned him on before.
Something was wrong in his head. It had to be.
His own actions made no sense to him anymore.
He shouldn't have acted the way he did.
He wasn't evenangrybefore so what the fuck was going on?
Maybe it was some kind of psychotic break.
He honestly wouldn't have been surprised. Everyone seemed to be watching him, waiting for one.
Fuck, his cousins thought he was suicidal. At school they didn't leave his side because they were watching him for it. That phone call had been Bakura checking to make sure he was still alive, as he and Malik and even Seto andonce, Mokuba–he said he didn't know why but Seto said to call him and so he did, because he didn't know about the "cliff diving" incident, because he hadn't been there to watch his red-eyed cousin drop into the water like a rock without warning, because he didn't even know that Yami couldn't swim–did every single day to make sure he was okay. If he even sounded off, they showed up at his house.
And hehadsounded off once when they called because he had just woken up from a much needed nap that was again interrupted when Malik burst through the door screaming his name at the top of his lungs and making his head hurt.
Ha, and his father…with all the crap he had put him through, it honestly should have come so much sooner.
Yugi groaned in the back of his throat. How the fuck had he even ended up here? At a gay bar?
He swallowed hard, already extremely self-conscious, probably being paranoid when he felt like someone wasalreadychecking him out. His arms remained folded over his chest tightly as he leaned against the bar, next to some blonde girl who gave him a small smile but offered no companionship. Not that he wanted it anyways.
But then he glanced around tentatively, his eyes widening and his face twisting into some kind of grimace crossed with a toothy smile…thingas he spotted several interested and overly curious gazes all directed towards him.
So not paranoid, he thought, turning away again; had he been anyone else, maybe that would have boosted his ego, but there were no red eyes in the group and there were no eyes that caught his attention besides a pair of teal but he didn't bother with them because it was merely the uniqueness of the color that made him look rather than the expression that lingered there.
The blonde girl smiled at him over her cocktail, nodding her head to some mellow electric music drifting out of the speakers. "You've certainly got a lot of admirers," she said kindly. "It feels kind of weird to not have guys looking atmefor once."
Yugi gave a small nervous, terribly embarrassed laugh as he looked at the counter.
"Would you relax a little?" she muttered, placing her now empty glass on the bar behind them and sighing. "You look like you might want to fight someone. Unfold your arms."
Yugi followed instructions but they fell and felt awkward in placement at his sides and his fingers wouldn't stop twitching, first busying them by scratching unnecessarily at his scalp until it practically burned beneath his nails, followed by leaning his elbows against the bar behind him and then fiddling absently with the hem of his shirt only to end up tracing his belts along his hips lazily before grabbing his wallet and going to count his money because there was nothing more he could do to keep his fingers busy.
"Will you stop fidgeting?" the girl snapped at him suddenly, startling him. "Relax. No one is going to bite you."
"Speak for yourself."
Both of them snapped their attention towards the newcomer, a blond boy with a lazy smirk on his face casually sipping a beer as he looked Yugi up and down slowly. He was kind of short–but of course he was taller than Yugi or Yami–and sort of skinny with tan, sinewy arms that made Yugi's stomach twist in knots. His hair was arranged in effortless spikes but it was clear he used gel by the way that it held itself and looked slightly shiny and sticky altogether. And he looked okay, with large, light blue eyes and a nice smile.
"Can I get you a drink?"
Yugi barked out a laugh. "Do I look anywhere near twenty-one?"
Just like that the smile was gone and he was given a strange look before the guy ambled off with a second glance at him while Yugi blinked once; oh, of course, his personality turned him off. Not the small body or the high-pitched voice that refused to deepen even though he had already hit puberty two years ago.
Right.
He rolled his eyes but was startled when she started laughing next to him.
"Okay, well I officially stand corrected. No one is going to bite, except maybe that guy. He looked carnivorous. Wanted a bite out of that cute ass of yours."
Yugi glowered. "Oh, you're so fucking funny," he hissed at her.
"It was hilarious. You should have seen yourface! All flushed and innocent and downrightadorable. No wonder you've been getting so much attention. You practicallyscreamfairy."
Yugi blinked once and then glared fiercely before turning away. "Whatever," he snapped.
It was not too bad, because at least the music was okay. The girl kept by his side the entire time, drinking cocktails while he sipped on a soda in order to be able to stay on one of the stools. And he definitely felt so much better with his back to the crowd because at least now he didn't have toseethe stares. He could stillfeelthem, though, and that was definitely not the best sensation in the world.
"I need to pee," she whispered suddenly, making him look up from his Sprite in surprise, feeling rather strange now that she was addressing him about something other than his so-called admirers. "I'll be right back."
Regardless of this, he nodded and went about drumming his finger in time with the beat of the music, jumping a mile when a voice asked, "Can I sit here?" alarmingly close to his ear.
It was a trick, he knew it, but it didn't stop him from spinning around with wide hopeful eyes, only to feel his chest cave in as he regarded the newcomer; the teal-eyed boy from before. The boy was tall, with dark midnight black hair that was spiky in the front and was pulled in a ponytail in the back but had bangs that fell over a black and red headband. There was a mark beneath his right eye that looked strangely like a birthmark. And his eyes were sharp and narrow, not nearly as captivating or sharp as Yami's, but definitely up there with them. His attire consisted of two parallel golden armbands and matching brown authentically-weaved bracelets. On his left ear was a dice earring that hung past his jaw. Dark maroon was the color of his vest which hung over a dark gray-black shirt and black jeans with a single dark gray belt to hold his pants up. He had rather pinkish lips that turned in a boyish smirk.
Yugi blinked when an eyebrow arched and then furrowed his brows for a moment, glancing over his shoulder before turning back and murmured, "I guess you can. I mean, my friend was sitting here"–was she a friend? No, she wasn't a friend, but Yugi couldn't just say "oh that girl was sitting here but she went to the bathroom so I don't know what the fuck to say about that" which was what originally sprang to mind–"so I guess not. I don't know. It's whatever."
He chuckled but it sounded wrong to Yugi's ears. "Don't worry about it." Instead of sitting he stood beside him, leaning against the bar by his elbows and occasionally sipping his amber-colored liquid, humming along to the music and watching the dance floor while Yugi merely sat there silently.
He couldn't help it when he glanced at him sideways, looking him over for a moment, because that was what people did; they looked each other over when they thought they were in the safety of the darkness.
And, of course, Yugi wasn't.
"Where's your friend?" he asked, tilting his head towards him with an amused smirk.
Yugi blinked and twisted around in his seat for a moment, searching before rolling his eyes; if he ever saw her again, he'd cut her head off and put it on a stick, parade around with it and maybe even send it to Yami saying he killed his fuck buddy off.
"No idea," he stated, turning back with a shrug. "Said she was going to the bathroom."
"She's been gone nearly half an hour now," he laughed, showing off two rows of perfectly straight, perfectly white teeth. "Is it okay if I take her seat?"
"Sure."
His stomach twisted with the statement and for a brief second his eyes sought out a familiar shape that did not exist in this group.
He sat on the stool and peeked at him from the side of his eye and Yugi felt his stomach clench; fuck, his eyelashes were pretty long. Not as long as his or Yami's by far, but still, they were longer than someone like Joey's or Ushio's or Tristan's. Not…as long as Tea's either.
"What's your name?"
"Yugi. You?"
He smirked. "I'm Duke."
Yugi opened his mouth to say something or other–he honestly had no idea what–but then his phone rang and when he pulled it out, the number made his stomach twist. Ugh, he didn't want to have to deal with Rebecca right now.
But the moment he put his phone away it vibrated with a text message that made his mind flood with a million different possibilities.
Okay, see you later.
And it wasn't directed towards him either, because obviously, he hadn't been talking to him since earlier so he had misdirected the text, confirmed a moment later when the next came in.
Shit, sorry. That wasn't meant for you.
No shit,Yugi thought wryly, wishing he could see Yami's face if only to punch him in the nose.
For the next ten minutes it was too quiet for him. The boy next to him–Duke–kept watching him from the corner of his eye and when he spoke to make conversation, Yugi could not keep himself involved for longer than a minute. He couldn't focus on the teal-eyed boy. No, his mind kept conjuring up all the possibilities and giving him images he really wished he could destroy.
A red-eyed boy on top of Mai, inside of Mai, fucking Mai…
A red-eyed boy kissing someone, inside of someone, on top of someone, fucking someone…
A red-eyed boy pushing Tea against the wall, a piece of him inside of Tea, finger-fucking Tea…
He wished his head would explode right about this moment. Just to give him some peace, because the next moment, there was the image of those bright vibrant red eyes–those piercing red eyes…thosefurious, soul-wrenching red eyes.
"How old are you, Yugi?" Duke asked suddenly, angling towards him on his stool; if he noticed his lack of conversational skills or the fact that Yugi had mixed vodka with his Sprite when the bartender was not looking, he said nothing.
"Sixteen."
"Then how did you get into this bar?" he inquired, smirking widely, elevating a trim, dark eyebrow.
Yugi shrugged. "I'm small. Hardly noticeable. Snuck in. Might as well be invisible half the time," he said emotionlessly.
"So you're still in high school."
"Yeah. Where else would a sixteen-year-old be?"
He expected him to be offended, but when he laughed Yugi had to make sure he hadn't been overheard and that wasn't someone else, surprised when the teal eyes danced with amusement.
"How old areyou?"
"Eighteen."
Yugi took a massive sip of his soda-vodka and his head felt like it was pulsing with the music as he nodded once.
"How are you getting home?" he asked, putting his empty beer on the bar top and watching him curiously.
"Well, I walked so–"
"There is no way I am letting you walk home under the influence," he said slyly. "It's badenoughthat I'm the one who bought you the alcohol in the first place. Especially seeing as you're underage."
Wait, had he just said he was going topayfor the vodka he had smuggled?
Yugi gave him a long, measured look and then downed the rest of his cup, closing his eyes against the buzzing that suddenly enveloped his mind. Holy fuck. "I haven't got any other way to get home. Besides, I'm not drunk. I can manage walking a few blocks"–ha, afewdidn't mean sixteen–"I'll just be extra careful of anyone looking for a short person to capture."
"Here, I'll drive you."
The small teen frowned a little but then shrugged halfheartedly; obviously Duke wasn't about to back down so whatever. But it was when they got out there that things seemed to suddenly fall into perspective out of nowhere.
Yugi was buzzed, yes, but not stupid and piss-faced. He realized the moment that Duke opened the back door what he meant by "drive".
The small teen gave him a furious look. "Just because you buy me a drink doesn't mean shit," he snapped. Ha,buy. All he did was leave a few extra bills on the counter to make up for the vodka Yugi stole in the first place. That wasn'tbuyingsomeone a drink. It waspayingfor stolen property.
Duke raised an eyebrow at him. "You said you wanted a ride–"
"Not likethat!" he spat. "I meant in the car–"
The taller boy rolled his eyes and gestured. "It would beinthe car."
"As in buckled up, you actuallydrivingthe damncar, not trying to make merideyou in the backseat."
But the more he studied him, even with the haze in his mind, he knew for a fact that the older boy was drunk. And he had to wonder why he didn't notice this before. What the hell was wrong with him that he didn't recognize it?
Oh right, Yami was what was wrong with him.
When the kiss happened Yugi was reeling with the blow of dark red eyes narrowed into a look of hatred. When fingers traveled up his arm and cupped the back of his head, stroking the hair there, he was fighting off the burn of his aching heart. When the knee pressed between his legs, he was drowning in the memory of their little fuck in the bathroom. When he felt the hand on his cheek, he knew without a doubt that this was not Yami and that was why he pushed Duke hard.
The other boy stumbled.
"If I was looking for a fuck, I would have found one on my own!" he snarled. "In fact, I have a person who I do this with all the goddamned time. Granted we're"–he hiccupped and the noise threw him for a loop for a second before he remembered what he was saying–"fighting, butstill."
God, he wasn't even looking for someone else. He was just looking a way to drown out his problems and a farther club that was close enough he could walk but one where it wouldn't be obvious who he was or what he was doing, where the rumors wouldn't exist. Where he wouldn't feel the weight of his grandfather's disappointment towards his actions a mile away. And this had been the only place he could find–a gay bar, a gay bar that he hadn't even realized existed until this very moment, one that he would have avoided if he had realized it was a gay barbeforehe got there. But it had been too late for him to turn away and besides, the guy had paid for his stolen drink…
When he reached out, Yugi smacked his hand away. "Don't fucking touch me."
When he approached again, Yugi grabbed a stone and hurled it; the entire back windshield broke into glittering shards of raining glass that he admired for a split second before he was knocked down. He landed with a sharp thudding noise, with Duke weighing heavily on top of him.
And then they were rolling and pulling at each other's hair, snarling and fighting and kicking and punching; it was only after he landed a blow the nose that Duke faltered enough for him to knee him hard in the hip and slam his elbow into his ribs.
He was too buzzed to really remember what Yami had done to restrain him that day, what he had done to restrain Joey at school. But either way, the three hits made blood leak like a faucet and Duke punched out but he managed to twist out of the way, punching him in the lip and breathing hard.
And maybe he should have tried to talk Duke out of fighting him, warned him that he was drunk, told him to knock it off, but he didn't want to.
He wanted to fight.
He wanted to make him bleed.
So what kind of person did that make him?
When Duke stopped moving, only then did Yugi realize the extent of the damage he had caused. The taller boy's shirt was stained and blackened against the light of the streetlamp further off down the street. One of his teal eyes was already beginning to swell; his straight nose and pink lips were a bloody mess. He stumbled to his feet, took two tentative steps forward, peering down at the splatters of his blood that stained the dark asphalt of the road.
And relief flooded him slowly but surely when he saw his chest moving up and down quickly.
He groaned as he slowly turned on his side and spat out more blood onto the road, snarling, "Youwillpay for this windshield."
"Fuck you," Yugi spat, moving forward–presumably to kick him, he supposed; he didn't really know, because he was a little low on steam and tired and his right leg hurt like someone had blown it to pieces–but then merely shook his head slowly.
Duke finally got up from the ground in a slow, tentative movement, wincing several times on the way to his full height, before looking around for his keys slowly; when he finally got them, he limped over to the driver's seat, shooting him one last look over his shoulder.
It was only after he drove off that Yugi allowed himself to succumb to the pain in his leg, taking a seat and laying it out, hissing in pain when he tried to move it, pulling his phone out and dialing.
"Grandpa?"
The elderly Motou murmured a groggy, "Yugi? Where are you?"
"I…" Was the pain in his leg really worth all of this humiliation and sure-to-come disappointment that would mar his grandfather's face upon coming to pick him up? "Grandpa, I twisted my leg. And I can't walk. I'm…I'm buzzed."
For a moment he thought that Solomon would ask what that meant exactly but a small gentle sigh of "Oh Yugi" told him he knew exactly what it meant and the small boy couldn't help the tears that stung his eyes, the way that they fell down his cheeks like twin waterfalls.
Yugi looked his ass over, studying himself excessively in the full body mirror. He had a nice ass. A little fuller than Yami's, cuter, rounder, but where his was round and cute, Yami's had this strange quality that made you really lust after it. It was luscious, somewhat flat but with enough to it that it filled out his jeans nicely and left a lot of girls in school–before the whole incident anyways–practically drooling over it. Yugi remembered all the time he had listened to girls chatting about "the new kid's ass" freshman year.
He wiggled his bottom a couple of times and then smirked. If he could have fucked himself, he definitely would have, but he couldn't so he would have to settle for Yami's ass instead of his.
It was so odd because he had seen the red-eyed teen only a week ago, and yet he was starting to get impatient and every cell in his body wanted Yami close to him…or rather, close to his tongue and his penis, but still close to him in the physical sense. And it was so sickening because at some point he started staring at the couch as if it might turn into the taller boy and it was exciting in the most disgusting of ways.
He was like some kind of junky and that disgusted him on so many levels he couldn't even wrap his head around it. If that couchdidturn into Yami, he swore he'd pray every single day and slaughter a cow, dance around fire and bathe in the rain if he had to.
He knew he had problems with people being out of his life–his parents were never around, his grandfather was always away on expeditions for fuck's sake–but this was ridiculous. He had withdrawal symptoms. He was twitchy upon awakening–but that could have been the sex dreams–and he kept hoping that Yami would walk through the door. And then of course he berated himself for being an idiot because Yami could not walk through the door without knocking first and Yugilettinghim in and then his mind would go on a completely different path that at some point, onceagainended with sex.
He wasn't even sure how it happened and it made his head spin.
He jumped off his chair and got asfar awayas possible from the couch before the cushions turned into ass cheeks and ran his hands through his hair. He was definitely losing his shit.
He wanted–no, heneeded–to see Yami again.
The only problem was that he was not sure ifYamiwanted to seehim. Considering the shit storm that they had unleashed on each other, it would not surprise him in theleastif Yami did not want to speak to him–at all. He hadn't even gotten up the courage to call the taller teen, that's how badly he was scared he had ruined things between them.
Duke Devlin. He claimed he fucked the shit out Yugi in the backseat of his car.
Yugi had neither denied nor confirmed this because it took too much energy. It took too much energy trying to persuade people who had already made up their minds about him having taken it up the ass from the teal-eyed boy. Far too much energy trying to change their minds. He didn't want to waste more than he had to as it was.
He was so tired of that bastard. So he rejected him. So what?
It really shouldn't have been that surprising.
But the look Yami gave him when the rumor hit his ears, the way he seemed to crumble in on himself momentarily, the way, for that brief second, his eyes looked haunted as if someone had just killed him, had killedhiminside.
And it was worse because the red-eyed boy refused to look at him again afterwards. He didn't look over in his general direction. He didn't even bother raising his head when the teacher called his name to ask how their project was going.
And the teacher's reaction to his silence, the way he wouldn't answer, was anything but good. Yami was written up for not behaving when someone claimed that he had done that to them–and he had, so he was forced to do the same to Yami–and the red-eyed teen had snatched the slip from him, torn it up, and walked out of class without a second glance.
Dear gods, things really were fucking up, weren't they?
"I agree to your terms."
Yami was leaning back in his seat across from his father, across from Seto, across from his lawyer Rafael who would give him strange looks every now and then. Almost as if he expected him to show fear in the face of the man before him.
But Yami didn't.
Because, around his neck, was the Puzzle.
And it shone a million different ways in the fluorescent lights.
"Then drop the lawsuit," he stated in a bored tone, not really paying attention to what was going on, more preoccupied with the things in his head that wouldn't leave. Of course Yugi had gone and gotten fucked. Why wouldn't he? That was what he did. He had fuck buddies. He didn't date.
He fucked and had fun with it. He pushed and pushed until you couldn't take it anymore.
And Yami hated himsomuch because of this. But it made so much sense and he felt so stupid for not realizing how pointless it was to eventhink for a secondthat Yugi would do anything else.
But Duke Devlin?
He glowered at a spot just behind his father's head, wishing he could bore a hole through it.
Duke Devlin was a piece of shit.
He used people and tossed them aside.
He commonly fucked with people–not physically but emotionally, mentally, beat them down and didn't bother to see if they got back up again.
But the black eye he sported, the busted lip, the way he winced every now and then when he breathed…
What if it hadn't been consensual?
What if he had raped him?
Yami thought it over. That would explain Yugi's silence.
Maybe. Possibly.
Ha, Yugi would be silent either fucking way.
Yami rolled his eyes as his father's lawyer started talking and his eyes flickered towards Seto who narrowed his gaze and gave him a warning look that he pointedly returned with a glare.
The day she came Yami was working on the project. And it was stupid, because he didn't know what the fuck he was supposed to do with it anymore, but he was still working on it. Three weeks…he didn't understand why the teacher gave them an extra three weeks. It was awkward and strange, but he supposed it was because the beginning of second half of the semester would beafterall the major tests and projects they had for other classes.
Or maybe he was taking pity on him. Maybe after he had gotten written up and left the room, he decided that things weren't going well between him and Yugi and just decided to move the date further back for them. It was possible. After all, as he had said, Yami was apparently his best student.
And what teacherwouldn'ttry to help out their best student if they had the chance?
He definitely wasn't complaining. Of course not. Not when he and Yugi didn't have a single thing done but the sixty-page essay that Yugi still needed to revise completely for them to make sure that there were no punctuation mistakes.
It was kind of funny, because his literature teacher didn't even pay as much attention to his punctuation as his history teacher did.
He wasn't expecting anyone when he opened the door and he definitely never expected her to be there–not once in a million years.
His stomach twisted and his fight-or-flight instinct made his body thrum with energy beneath his skin, his muscles preparing, his entire being going rigid and his breathing quickening for a split moment.
"M-mother," he managed to get out, wide-eyed. "W-what are you–? Is father–?"
"Atem."
She sounded so proud and yet so heartbroken it was overwhelming.
And Yami wasn't delusion. He knew the pride was merely because he looked okay, because he wasn't dead or something. And he knew the heartbreak. Because he mirrored it.
But he still wanted to sink into the depths of her voice, drown in it, hear her sing songs to him to make him fall asleep at night, in that sweet tone that relaxed him no matter how bad things really got.
But no, the time had passed for that. He was alone in this.
Neither his mother nor his father would accept it.
And that was why she was here.
"Father said you never wanted to see me again," he muttered, because he had; not in those exact words, but the context of it was the same.My wifenotyour mother.My wife.
She took a deep breath, sighed through her nose, stepped inside, walked past him, waited for him to close the door, turned around…
"Oh, Atem, tell me it's not true."
He shook his head. "I cannot do that."
She stared and her dark gray-blue-red-flecked eyes watered. "Please, tell me it's not true."
He shook his head again. "Denial will help no one."
"It's not true. Tell me it's not true!"
"It's true," he snapped. "It's true. I am gay."
The slap was hard and sent him stumbling but he didn't fall, merely glancing at her.
"You say that almost as if you are proud!" she spat, shaking her head with the beginning of tears in her eyes.
Yami didn't answer her, because he just got tired of her denial. He wasn't proud of it. Years of living with them made him fully ashamed of himself. But what would be the point of saying this? It would ease no one's pain. And if she wished to think that he was proud of himself for this, that was her own right.
She was entitled to being wrong.
It didn't matter to him anyways.
It would all be over soon enough.
And after…
Well, there really wasn't much of an after that he knew of.
Right now, he only had the strength to deal with the present.
"How could you be proud of such a thing?" she cried, shaking her head as a tear leaked from her left eye. "It makes no sense. We raised you better than this! We raised you to be the best and you've turned into…a lowlife child like the rest of them at that stupid school!"
He didn't argue. He didn't have the strength to do something that would change nothing. He was tired. He wanted to get the stupid project done. He wanted high school over. He wanted to be able to drop it all and then just go to the next continent that caught his attention. Maybe Europe…possibly Australia. Fuck, he'd go to Antarctica if only there were people there and he wouldn't be allowed to wallow on his mistakes.
"You will always be my mother, as he will always be my father. That is biology. But biology is fickle. You may have passed a lot to me by DNA, but you did not pass along your intolerance or stupidity. You can disown me all you would like, but that does not mean much because you both have already proved that whatever strengths you may have once possessed, have been swallowed by thought processes and natural instincts to become seriously flawed. How you feel about me is yours to shuffle as you see fit. But this is about you two, not me."
Another slap made him stumble but did not knock him to his knees.
"This is about you two–your inadequacies, your ignorance, your inability to accept, your fears of what others think of you. But you both used to pretend you were so selfless when it came to me. But selfishness is exactly what this all boils down to. Not once have either of you asked how I have dealt with this. Did you think Iwantedthis? No, of course I didn't. And of course it never crossed your minds. All you two haveeverthought of is yourselves. My upbringing was so that you two would look better, not because of you wanted the best for me."
"Ra would never have intended for this lifestyle. You should get on your knees and pray for forgiveness from our god."
Yami stared blankly. "Ra? You dare to bringRainto this?" he spat. "Ra has no bearing upon anything! And how would you know what a god wishes, mother? You are not a god, no matter how much you wish to be. Father will never make it as high as he seeks to reach because you both pretend that you know the work of a higher power when you knownothing!"
He felt like he might be foaming at the mouth but it felt right and he didn't want to stop, so despite her horrified expression, like he had struck her, he continued.
"Even if Ra cared so deeply about the life ofoneinsignificant speck on one planet in a universe compiled of trillions of other planets, what makes you think that you know the desires of agod?" He shook his head and glared at her. "What happened to what you used to tell me when I was young, mother? What happened to 'No matter what you do, where you go, or who you become, I will always love you, I will always protect you, and you will always be my little boy, always and forever'–what happened to that? Have I changed so much that you can't possibly love me anymore?"
This time he didn't even stagger, but she did. She fell into him and they both went to the ground on their knees. Yami wasn't sure what possessed him to stay where he was, because as much as he loved her with everything he had, he wanted away from her–so far away.
She was crying and he should have cared–and maybe in the deepest recesses of his mind, where his heart actuallywasbreaking with the blow of it all, he truly did–but the energy was too much. He was still so, so tired…
Okay, so he hadn't expected her to look him in the eye and hand him a box of condoms and lube and tell him to go find a nice guy with her blessing, but this shit was ridiculous. What the hell was so horrible about it all?
He didn't understand it, not even after having it drilled in his head for so long.
Sure, it scared him, but he was okay. He was healthy. He was fine. He wasn't dying. Ra had not decided to kill him. Ra had done nothing to punish him–his own bad choices were his punishment…Yugiwas his punishment. But that was it.
Whathadhappened to her?
To saying "No matter what you do, where you go, or who you become, I will always love you, I will always protect you, and you will always be my little boy, always and forever" every night before bed? He had missed her so much in those two years he had been gone. He had stayed up his whole first month because she never said it.
Perhaps…somewhere along the line, they all changed.
And he was okay with that. He was okay with being too independent to need her words every night. And he was okay with being strong enough to actually stand up to his father at moments when he truly needed to. And he was okay with being different.
What he wasn't okay with was their acting as if he was not their son, like they didn't know him anymore, like he was a stranger, completely disposable and easy to replace.
No tears came from his eyes like he thought they might have months before.
Instead he merely hugged her tightly, didn't bother to say anything else. Didn't bother to say he loved her.
He did, but the words wouldn't come out of his mouth. He still loved her so much…
"You will not receive a blessing for the shame you have brought upon us."
She was sobbing into his chest but her voice was strong despite it.
He wondered where he got his strength from. His mother or his father…
"But please, don't expect any further communication with me, with your father, with us," she begged, though her voice still held that undercurrent of strength. "We will not come to visit, nor do we want you in our lives. You have made your choice–however wrong it may be. Ra did not intend for this unnatural lifestyle and if you are ever to return to Egypt…do not ever seek us out again. I wish you only the best in life."
Yami stood up first, because that was what his gut told him to do, and when he offered his hand, she took it for what they both knew would be the last time. "I understand," was all he said in response.
She took his face in her hands, held him there, stared deep into his eyes, and then turned and walked off.
Yami didn't bother to watch her departure.
Note: Story will be updated every Wednesday
Warning: TONS of cursing throughout story
Lemon Warning: Semi-dark lemon. SOME Season 0 Yami is involved in it.If you want to skip the lemon, don't read past the statement "I say we fuck the memories out of my head" until you reach the statement "Leave". If you don't think you're going to remember that, use F and Ctrl and type both phrases in, then delete the first phrase when you come up to it and use the Find function to get to the second part where the lemon is finished.
Lemon Note: The lemon actually serves a MAJOR purpose in this chapter and later in story.
Season 0 Yami Warning: Season 0 Yami makes an appearance for some of chapter.
Insanity Warning: Brief considerations that character is going insane. Nothing too graphic.
Drinking Warning: Underage drinking is indulged at gay bar.
Rape Attempt Warning: Not too graphic. Mostly just a conversation turned wrong and a fight.
Implied Sex Warning: Nothing graphic.
Chapter XV: I Understand
What the actual fuck?
Ra, did he always have to have such bad timing?
Couldn't he justoncepick a good fucking time to show up unannounced?
Yami still couldn't move the blade away from his mouth, eyes wide and unblinking, owlish in expression and looking somewhat shocked, and Ambassador Aknamkanon had his eyes narrowed into a furious glare, his dark gray-brown eyes seeming to bore into his skin with shock.
It was kind of comical in a dark sense.
And that was exactly why he nearly burst out laughing.
Apple juice splattered from the blade like blood and if Yami were an apple, he would have been worried. But those red eyes, owlish and unblinking and so stunned, with that knife and an apple slice he had his mouth open to bite into, that was hilarious.
Oh the other hand…Ambassador Aknamkanon? Not so much.
"Oh, is this the little slut?" he growled.
And Yugi backed up with wide eyes, because that voice, that tone, made his skin crawl and now there were pieces falling into place. Oh holy shit, Seto wasn't kidding when he said that Yami's father was the one who put him in the hospital.
"Father, if you touch him, I will be forced to take action," Yami muttered, taking his slice of apple and suddenly going back into motion, licking the blade clean of juice as the ambassador approached Yugi slowly. "That's your only warning."
And the ambassador stopped short and slowly turned his head, a small bit of fear in his eyes. And Yugi had to wonder what the fuck he had to fear from Yami when the boy hadn't been able to stop him before.
Yami made a purring noise and licked off some more juice left behind by his other apple slice, looking at his father pointedly. It was enough to make Yugi shiver in fear and his father stay as he was, frozen. When he got up, his father backed up a step as the taller teen strode towards him, pointing the knife lazily towards his heart. "I think it's about time you hit the road before something we regret were to happen, don't you?" He pressed the tip against his clothing and his father paled before backing up a step; Yami gestured towards the door, sliding the knife up and down his torso, muttering, "I can list off your vital organs. And I can stab through them like butter. It'd be fun, father. Want to play? You have five minutes to get the fuck out of my house before I do it."
For a moment he didn't answer or even move.
"I think maybe I'll split your stomach open first. Let your intestines fall out." He made a swiping motion with the knife before humming and then pressing it just above the belt, moving it as he continued listing off organs. "Here is your spleen–not really vital, but it's still there. Your liver–you know it's the only organ that regenerates? Pancreas–not vital, but it could be fun to cut out–"
And then the ambassador turned and strode towards the door with what little dignity he had left while Yami watched him with sharp eyes, waving the knife at him.
"Bye. Remember to bring a better conversation topic next time. I'm rather bored with the current."
As soon as he was gone, Yami rounded on Yugi, pointing the knife at him for a moment, studying him before turning away and tossing it onto the table with a small backwards glance at the wood. "Yugi, what the hell are you even doing here?" he murmured, and he sounded so tired it was amazing he had even just done what he did.
Yugi opened his mouth, not to answer but to ask if he was okay, but never got the words out because Yami spun around and suddenly grabbed him, pulling him straight into him. Yugi stumbled against him, the Puzzle hard as it hit his stomach, and moaned as Yami's mouth moved against his and a tongue sought his as a playmate.
His hands unconsciously grabbed at his arms to steady himself because the Puzzle in his abdomen kind of hurt. It was a lot sharper in edges than he had originally thought. It had looked a little blunt from where he was standing a few seconds ago, but now he knew the edges were like razors, that the flat sides were sharp where they joined. And the chain was so thick…
Honestly, how the fuck had Yami even managed to not notice when he got his fingers caught?
But holy fuck, the Puzzle was burning. It burned through his shirt and left his stomach searing, not with pain but with a strange sense of accomplishment, perhaps?
Either way, it burned and left him feeling warm and strange and so…oddly wonderful. It was one of those moments where he could melt into something without even really caring that he shouldn't.
And he knew he shouldn't, because this seemed like one of those times where he was supposed to push Yami away, to put some distance between them, but he wanted this just as badly as he did.
He wanted a distraction and that was what Yami sought too.
Otherwise, this wouldn't be happening.
"I say we fuck the memories out of my head," Yami growled against his lips when he pulled back to breathe some, mouth still extremely close to Yugi's.
Yugi laughed and nodded vigorously, gazing into hooded red eyes that seemed to bleed with the darkness of their pupils, that off-colored tint of blackish-gray swirling and discoloring them further. "Sounds like a plan."
Yami snatched his arm and led the way eagerly upstairs where Yugi was promptly thrown onto a mattress with a plush red comforter and what seemed like a million pillows.
"My mom likes to buy pillows," he muttered as an explanation when Yugi literally pulled away from him to twist his head around and look at them all, eyes wide; when he looked back Yami was giving him an impatient look.
And just as Yugi was about to get his jacket off, the phone started ringing.
"Ignore it," Yami breathed against his mouth as his hips ground into Yugi's; so he did, grabbing at Yami's shoulders as he slipped the jacket off and prepared to take his shirt off, only to stop short when the ringing did not stop. In fact, the more they ignored it and the longer it rang, the louder it got.
Yugi pulled away slightly to look at the little white device and a growl of "Yugi" made him turn back long enough to bunch Yami's shirt up in his hands and pull it over his head as the taller teen wanted.
"Fucking–Yami, I can't think with that stupid thing droning on and on like that!" he cried, annoyed.
Yami let out a snarl of pure rage and then snatched it from where it was charging before barking, "What the fuck do youwant, Bakura?"
Yugi went bug-eyed when Yami pressed harder into him while undoing the belts on his pants with only one hand, glaring at the device in his hand and slipping the rest of his clothes off while Bakura said whatever it was he was saying.
"I don't know," he snapped, "tomorrow maybe? Look, can't help you. I have to go."
Yugi was startled when Yami gave him a look and gestured for him to get his clothes off, hurrying to abide by his wishes as fast as he possibly could. He was stripping of his own pants and boxers when Yami spoke again.
"I said I have to–because I'm trying to fuck Yugi, damn it!"
Yugi's mouth fell open as Yami hung up, putting the phone back in place and turning to him again with a wide smirk.
"We…really need to work on your censorship," the smaller boy muttered before shaking his head in a daze and quickly pulling his clothes off the rest of the way, watching as Yami twisted off him to let him get the jeans off and throw them down on the floor.
"You should work on yours," Yami replied gruffly as he got between his legs again, a finger entering him before he could even think straight.
Yugi snorted. "It never works."
"Admittedly, I've never tried it, but whatever. I could have censored if I wanted to."
Yugi let out another snort. "Right, Yami."
"I could. I haven't exactly cursed around you nearly as much as you do me," he responded–or at least he didn't think he did…did he? Yami thought back for a moment and then rolled his eyes before pressing a second finger inside of him.
"…Yeah, that's probably true," the smaller boy admitted around a loud mewl.
He pressed a third finger into him and Yugi squirmed because this seemed a lot faster than the normal pace but he was okay with that–he was, but holy fuck, he wasn't used to being prepped so quickly.
"Tell me something Yugi."
It sounded simple and casual enough a statement, but his next words tore that up completely.
"How do the others fuck you?"
He blinked wide eyes and moaned when Yami pressed into him almost immediately after taking his fingers away, baring his teeth next to his ear, growling softly. "Do they pound you? Or is it one of those slow and steady things? I bet I can do it better."
Yugi squirmed, surprised, shocked, and so turned on it hurt like all hell. His hand shot up to grab at Yami's hair, moaning softly once before bucking wildly against his penis, striking a bubble of need and control that burst inside of the taller teen.
"Maybe you pound them," Yami said softly before gliding his right canine over his soft baby-fat cheek, nipping with his bottom canine and pulling slightly before baring his teeth against his ear and growling loudly, the noise making him tremble and move faster. "Do they tie you up? I bet you've been cuffed a couple of times. Maybe even participated in a threesome? Hmm…"
Yugi grabbed at his shoulder and exposed his neck for Yami to nip at. One of the soft bites made him yelp and squirm, eyes widening in surprise as he realized Yami had broken skin.
"I wonder how many marks you've been given…"
When Yami suddenly pulled back and bared his teeth at him, Yugi blinked a few times, startled by the action and definitely caught off guard by the fact that he was no longer filled, hissing in annoyance. "Well?" Yami spat at him, his teeth gleaming with a small bit of his blood and tons of saliva mixed with the natural lighting the window fed the room. "Tell me."
Yugi wasn't exactly sure why he decided that he was going to manipulate Yami into giving him exactly what he wanted, but that was what he ended up doing. "They fuck me hard and fast and they pound me into the mattress until I'm too tired to even breathe," he hissed back, smirking when the taller boy's lip curled back slightly. "I fuck them until they can't walk anymore. And I honestly don't think youcoulddo better than them."
Yami grabbed him hard, fingertips definitely going to leave bruises, roughly pushing him further into the pillows with the force of the lunge, snapping his hips forward and making him cry out in surprise at the intrusion.
Yugi tried to press his lips against his again but Yami turned his face away each time, sometimes burying it into his neck and licking at the bite mark he had left while never once faltering in his too-fast-too-hard thrusts. But even with his nails digging into his shoulder, and his hand ripping at his hair, the smaller boy managed to meet him thrust for thrust, moaning loudly and bordering on screaming when his prostate was struck.
It seemed the faster and harder Yami snapped his hips inside him, the higher Yugi's legs wrapped around his back, and the further up the bed they moved, because, not even five minutes into it, Yugi's head hit the bed's headboard and he pressed hard against it while the pillows fell and hit the ground soundlessly from either side.
Yugi wasn't sure what he was doing at first, but the change of position–the smallest, tiniest turn of his body, his face leaving his neck–made his eyelids flicker and his eyes shoot open wide in shock; Yami pressed his hand against the board and then slipped it up to the top, not bothering with the other which held his hips down against the mattress.
The bed was squeaking and it was a little irritating, but Yugi could ignore it, especially when Yami lowered his eyes towards his and narrowed them into slits, not once bothering to slow his pace.
The sound of skin slapping and the glistening sheen of sweat on their bodies and the moaning and borderline screams made it a lot harder than either of them had anticipated when it came to lasting.
But, on the plus side, the coils snapped in them both at the same time. Yami throbbed and emptied out in him while his own came in thick ribbons and coated them both; the taller teen pressed his forehead into the headboard, breathing hard.
Fuck, Yugi's legs felt like jelly and he was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to sit for at least a week…
He'd need one of those donut things–inflation tubes…
"Where…thefuck…d idthat…come from?" Yugi hissed, panting and looking at him with wide eyes; Yami gave him a single look before closing his eyes and going back to steadying his breathing, shaking his head slightly.
Well, fuck, was that what happened when Yami got curious about his other–very fake–fuck buddies? Ooh.
Well, that could work in his favor.
"Holy shit…I think I fucking love you right now."
Yami didn't react like he thought he would. He had expected him to laugh, but instead he was met with a cold, cruel sneer. "Right."
"I was referring to your dick, Yami," he snapped.
Yami rolled his eyes and shook his head. "We can't do this shit anymore."
Yugi didn't bother pointing out that he didn't pull away even as he said this, that he didn't pull out, that his flaccid penis was still very much inside him. "Oh, bullshit, Yami. It's not my fault you misinterpreted."
"Yugi, shut up already. I'm really not in the mood to hear whatever the fuck you want to say. Obviously the idea of us ever being together is your hard limit. If you're so fucking terrified–"
"Hard limit?" Yugi asked, laughing once. "This isn't some kind of BDSM experiment because you sure as fuck would not be my dominant."
"You know, you joke about every little thing you can get your fucking hands on, Yugi, but this isn't a fucking joke to me. It's a slap in the fucking face."
Yugi grimaced. "Yami, I'm–"
"Shut up."
"Would you just give me a second to explain?"
"Why should I listen to anything you say anymore?" the red-eyed teen spat, shaking his head but still not moving away. "You say and imply enough."
"I–I didn't think before I said it. That's all."
"Yugi, whether the fuck it was in the moment or not, the tone of your voice and the look in your eyes said it all. So, don't worry. I'll find a way to get over you."
Yugi opened and closed his mouth but ended up closing his eyes after a moment as well, chewing his cheek thoughtfully.
"I don't want to be fucking used anymore," Yami said suddenly, making him open his eyes and stare at a pair of red that blazed right through him. "It's pathetic and I feel like shit every time."
"I'm not using you!" Yugi protested. "In fact, you're the one who tops most often. If anyone is using the other, it's you usingme!"
Yami bared his teeth for a moment before looking away again. "I wonder if they all feel like this afterwards," he muttered under his breath.
Yugi was about to say they all probably felt like they fucking rocked his world or had theirs rocked, but then reconsidered as he really didn't want to fucking deal with it anymore, feeling sick to his stomach with the pain that radiated off the taller teen. And then he felt disgusting because the only thought that crossed his mind was nothing of an apology but came out as a sneer ofWell, you're the only one so I guess they all do.
And that was something that he had to be ashamed of because it was sowrong.
"You know, you're blowing this out of proportion. It was just playful pillow talk," Yugi found himself complaining before he really thought it through, going bug-eyed when Yami turned his head and seemed to breathe hard through his nose before closing his eyes and shaking his head.
"I'm so done with this bullshit. I'm done putting up with all the shit you put me through, Yugi. I'm so sorry that you apparently seem to beallergicto even the word love, but it has nothing to do with me and everything to do with you. For a while there I was convinced it was me, but it's allyou!" he spat, glaring and baring his teeth. "I admit that sometimes I overreact to some things but I'm pretty sure you would be reacting the same way if you were in my shoes."
"But I'm smart and that's why I'mnotin your fucking shoes, Yami, because I didn't let myself get attached!" Yugi yelled.
"What the fuck iswrongwith you?" Yami growled softly. "You tell me I don't know what love is, but doyou?"
"Look, I don'tneedyou telling me how big of an asshole I am, Yami. I am well aware, okay?" Yugi spat.
"Don't get fucking smartass with me, idiot. Ra fucking–did your mom and dad slam your goddamned head in a solid oak door when you were a baby?"
He was hissing and Yugi was glaring, but both of them were hardening.
"The saying is dropping a child on its head–"
"I am not so stupid that I don't know that! I am just more fucking original than that."
Yugi made a scoffing noise and then shook his head. "You wish you were above the rest of us, don't you?"
"Don't fucking mess with me right now, Yugi."
"Ha, but isn't that what you've been doing to me this entire time, Yami? Are you too good to have it thrown back in your–" The cry that left his lips sounded almost akin to a scream but not quite there, not that Yami wanted that anyways; he had sensitive ears as it was. He didn't need Yugi's loud pitch to completely screw him over later. Yugi shot him a furious look. "That's dirty, Yami."
Yami sneered at him but didn't say anything for a long minute. "I think we might have ruined my bedspread."
That had to be the weirdest thing Yugi had ever heard in his life.
Yami had liked that color.
"Oh well." When he jerked backwards and pulled Yugi with him, the smaller boy yelped in surprise at the sudden falling sensation, grabbing at him with wide eyes before letting out a small breath of relief that was barely audible to even him as Yami steadied them so that he was sitting back on his knees with Yugi straddling his lap.
Yugi was tired, yes, but not enough to miss out on the sensation of Yami pulling him up to drive him back down just as fast, the movements making him hiss and moan as he grabbed at his shoulders harder with his nails.
But the studious light to the red eyes said that Yami knew about his little fear of falling, and that was why those lips were pulled back smugly as his movements continued. He wasn't laughing at him, but he was saying that Yugi should have known better than to think he would let him fall.
Yugi's heart squeezed a little, pain burning through the pleasure for a split second, but it was gone just as fast when nails bit in his shoulder blade and he let out a yelp that blended into a moan that eventually bled into a chain of scarcely-spaced mewls that seemed to bounce off the walls around them.
He leaned forward, buried his face in his neck, clamped down around him, back arching like a cat's, nails digging into his arms, rocking harder and faster until finally the coil snapped again. He collapsed into the worn out red-eyed boy who just barely kept from falling over by grabbing the bed cover as tightly as he could. His hand slowly reached up to rub at Yugi's back for a moment, closing his eyes and breathing hard.
And it wasn't until twenty minutes had passed that Yami finally let go of him and growled, "I was serious earlier" as he pushed Yugi back against the mattress, pulling away and out of him in one swift motion, giving him a somewhat bitter and cynical look. "I don't want to be used anymore. And I won't use you either."
Yugi gave him a startled, slightly hazed look before opening his mouth.
"Leave."
"What?" he choked, eyes wide.
Yami glanced at him as he got up to grab the Puzzle off the nightstand where he found that the bottom had been touching the bed; why this bothered him so much, he wasn't certain, but it did. "I said you have to leave."
"Oh, no, Iheardthat," Yugi hissed. "But what the fuck–"
"I'm not using you and you're not using me either. I'm tired of it. I've lost all passion for it. But then…that always happens, right? When things are one-sided? When they're just forfun?" Yami narrowed his eyes into slits, the gleam of the sunlight making them look almost predatory. "Someone always gets bored, Yugi. Because that's human nature. We get bored with our toys."
Yugi opened and closed his mouth and then stared some more.
"I'll give you twenty minutes to get out. After that, if you're not gone, I'm going to throw you out on your ass for everyone to see," he spat before turning and walking off into the bathroom, shutting and locking the door.
He turned on the water but listened for Yugi moving outside the door, heard him grabbing his clothes, grabbing what he guessed was the towel from the sink out there, turning on the water and then walking off. He couldn't hear him get dressed, not that he would have regardless with the water on. But he did hear the door when it opened and closed again, not even a slam of a noise.
Yami breathed hard when he lay back against the door, groaning softly. He was so tired. In all honesty, he was surprised he even got that far in their little rendezvous. And he shouldn't have gotten turned on by that argument. Arguments with Yugi had never turned him on before.
Something was wrong in his head. It had to be.
His own actions made no sense to him anymore.
He shouldn't have acted the way he did.
He wasn't evenangrybefore so what the fuck was going on?
Maybe it was some kind of psychotic break.
He honestly wouldn't have been surprised. Everyone seemed to be watching him, waiting for one.
Fuck, his cousins thought he was suicidal. At school they didn't leave his side because they were watching him for it. That phone call had been Bakura checking to make sure he was still alive, as he and Malik and even Seto andonce, Mokuba–he said he didn't know why but Seto said to call him and so he did, because he didn't know about the "cliff diving" incident, because he hadn't been there to watch his red-eyed cousin drop into the water like a rock without warning, because he didn't even know that Yami couldn't swim–did every single day to make sure he was okay. If he even sounded off, they showed up at his house.
And hehadsounded off once when they called because he had just woken up from a much needed nap that was again interrupted when Malik burst through the door screaming his name at the top of his lungs and making his head hurt.
Ha, and his father…with all the crap he had put him through, it honestly should have come so much sooner.
Yugi groaned in the back of his throat. How the fuck had he even ended up here? At a gay bar?
He swallowed hard, already extremely self-conscious, probably being paranoid when he felt like someone wasalreadychecking him out. His arms remained folded over his chest tightly as he leaned against the bar, next to some blonde girl who gave him a small smile but offered no companionship. Not that he wanted it anyways.
But then he glanced around tentatively, his eyes widening and his face twisting into some kind of grimace crossed with a toothy smile…thingas he spotted several interested and overly curious gazes all directed towards him.
So not paranoid, he thought, turning away again; had he been anyone else, maybe that would have boosted his ego, but there were no red eyes in the group and there were no eyes that caught his attention besides a pair of teal but he didn't bother with them because it was merely the uniqueness of the color that made him look rather than the expression that lingered there.
The blonde girl smiled at him over her cocktail, nodding her head to some mellow electric music drifting out of the speakers. "You've certainly got a lot of admirers," she said kindly. "It feels kind of weird to not have guys looking atmefor once."
Yugi gave a small nervous, terribly embarrassed laugh as he looked at the counter.
"Would you relax a little?" she muttered, placing her now empty glass on the bar behind them and sighing. "You look like you might want to fight someone. Unfold your arms."
Yugi followed instructions but they fell and felt awkward in placement at his sides and his fingers wouldn't stop twitching, first busying them by scratching unnecessarily at his scalp until it practically burned beneath his nails, followed by leaning his elbows against the bar behind him and then fiddling absently with the hem of his shirt only to end up tracing his belts along his hips lazily before grabbing his wallet and going to count his money because there was nothing more he could do to keep his fingers busy.
"Will you stop fidgeting?" the girl snapped at him suddenly, startling him. "Relax. No one is going to bite you."
"Speak for yourself."
Both of them snapped their attention towards the newcomer, a blond boy with a lazy smirk on his face casually sipping a beer as he looked Yugi up and down slowly. He was kind of short–but of course he was taller than Yugi or Yami–and sort of skinny with tan, sinewy arms that made Yugi's stomach twist in knots. His hair was arranged in effortless spikes but it was clear he used gel by the way that it held itself and looked slightly shiny and sticky altogether. And he looked okay, with large, light blue eyes and a nice smile.
"Can I get you a drink?"
Yugi barked out a laugh. "Do I look anywhere near twenty-one?"
Just like that the smile was gone and he was given a strange look before the guy ambled off with a second glance at him while Yugi blinked once; oh, of course, his personality turned him off. Not the small body or the high-pitched voice that refused to deepen even though he had already hit puberty two years ago.
Right.
He rolled his eyes but was startled when she started laughing next to him.
"Okay, well I officially stand corrected. No one is going to bite, except maybe that guy. He looked carnivorous. Wanted a bite out of that cute ass of yours."
Yugi glowered. "Oh, you're so fucking funny," he hissed at her.
"It was hilarious. You should have seen yourface! All flushed and innocent and downrightadorable. No wonder you've been getting so much attention. You practicallyscreamfairy."
Yugi blinked once and then glared fiercely before turning away. "Whatever," he snapped.
It was not too bad, because at least the music was okay. The girl kept by his side the entire time, drinking cocktails while he sipped on a soda in order to be able to stay on one of the stools. And he definitely felt so much better with his back to the crowd because at least now he didn't have toseethe stares. He could stillfeelthem, though, and that was definitely not the best sensation in the world.
"I need to pee," she whispered suddenly, making him look up from his Sprite in surprise, feeling rather strange now that she was addressing him about something other than his so-called admirers. "I'll be right back."
Regardless of this, he nodded and went about drumming his finger in time with the beat of the music, jumping a mile when a voice asked, "Can I sit here?" alarmingly close to his ear.
It was a trick, he knew it, but it didn't stop him from spinning around with wide hopeful eyes, only to feel his chest cave in as he regarded the newcomer; the teal-eyed boy from before. The boy was tall, with dark midnight black hair that was spiky in the front and was pulled in a ponytail in the back but had bangs that fell over a black and red headband. There was a mark beneath his right eye that looked strangely like a birthmark. And his eyes were sharp and narrow, not nearly as captivating or sharp as Yami's, but definitely up there with them. His attire consisted of two parallel golden armbands and matching brown authentically-weaved bracelets. On his left ear was a dice earring that hung past his jaw. Dark maroon was the color of his vest which hung over a dark gray-black shirt and black jeans with a single dark gray belt to hold his pants up. He had rather pinkish lips that turned in a boyish smirk.
Yugi blinked when an eyebrow arched and then furrowed his brows for a moment, glancing over his shoulder before turning back and murmured, "I guess you can. I mean, my friend was sitting here"–was she a friend? No, she wasn't a friend, but Yugi couldn't just say "oh that girl was sitting here but she went to the bathroom so I don't know what the fuck to say about that" which was what originally sprang to mind–"so I guess not. I don't know. It's whatever."
He chuckled but it sounded wrong to Yugi's ears. "Don't worry about it." Instead of sitting he stood beside him, leaning against the bar by his elbows and occasionally sipping his amber-colored liquid, humming along to the music and watching the dance floor while Yugi merely sat there silently.
He couldn't help it when he glanced at him sideways, looking him over for a moment, because that was what people did; they looked each other over when they thought they were in the safety of the darkness.
And, of course, Yugi wasn't.
"Where's your friend?" he asked, tilting his head towards him with an amused smirk.
Yugi blinked and twisted around in his seat for a moment, searching before rolling his eyes; if he ever saw her again, he'd cut her head off and put it on a stick, parade around with it and maybe even send it to Yami saying he killed his fuck buddy off.
"No idea," he stated, turning back with a shrug. "Said she was going to the bathroom."
"She's been gone nearly half an hour now," he laughed, showing off two rows of perfectly straight, perfectly white teeth. "Is it okay if I take her seat?"
"Sure."
His stomach twisted with the statement and for a brief second his eyes sought out a familiar shape that did not exist in this group.
He sat on the stool and peeked at him from the side of his eye and Yugi felt his stomach clench; fuck, his eyelashes were pretty long. Not as long as his or Yami's by far, but still, they were longer than someone like Joey's or Ushio's or Tristan's. Not…as long as Tea's either.
"What's your name?"
"Yugi. You?"
He smirked. "I'm Duke."
Yugi opened his mouth to say something or other–he honestly had no idea what–but then his phone rang and when he pulled it out, the number made his stomach twist. Ugh, he didn't want to have to deal with Rebecca right now.
But the moment he put his phone away it vibrated with a text message that made his mind flood with a million different possibilities.
Okay, see you later.
And it wasn't directed towards him either, because obviously, he hadn't been talking to him since earlier so he had misdirected the text, confirmed a moment later when the next came in.
Shit, sorry. That wasn't meant for you.
No shit,Yugi thought wryly, wishing he could see Yami's face if only to punch him in the nose.
For the next ten minutes it was too quiet for him. The boy next to him–Duke–kept watching him from the corner of his eye and when he spoke to make conversation, Yugi could not keep himself involved for longer than a minute. He couldn't focus on the teal-eyed boy. No, his mind kept conjuring up all the possibilities and giving him images he really wished he could destroy.
A red-eyed boy on top of Mai, inside of Mai, fucking Mai…
A red-eyed boy kissing someone, inside of someone, on top of someone, fucking someone…
A red-eyed boy pushing Tea against the wall, a piece of him inside of Tea, finger-fucking Tea…
He wished his head would explode right about this moment. Just to give him some peace, because the next moment, there was the image of those bright vibrant red eyes–those piercing red eyes…thosefurious, soul-wrenching red eyes.
"How old are you, Yugi?" Duke asked suddenly, angling towards him on his stool; if he noticed his lack of conversational skills or the fact that Yugi had mixed vodka with his Sprite when the bartender was not looking, he said nothing.
"Sixteen."
"Then how did you get into this bar?" he inquired, smirking widely, elevating a trim, dark eyebrow.
Yugi shrugged. "I'm small. Hardly noticeable. Snuck in. Might as well be invisible half the time," he said emotionlessly.
"So you're still in high school."
"Yeah. Where else would a sixteen-year-old be?"
He expected him to be offended, but when he laughed Yugi had to make sure he hadn't been overheard and that wasn't someone else, surprised when the teal eyes danced with amusement.
"How old areyou?"
"Eighteen."
Yugi took a massive sip of his soda-vodka and his head felt like it was pulsing with the music as he nodded once.
"How are you getting home?" he asked, putting his empty beer on the bar top and watching him curiously.
"Well, I walked so–"
"There is no way I am letting you walk home under the influence," he said slyly. "It's badenoughthat I'm the one who bought you the alcohol in the first place. Especially seeing as you're underage."
Wait, had he just said he was going topayfor the vodka he had smuggled?
Yugi gave him a long, measured look and then downed the rest of his cup, closing his eyes against the buzzing that suddenly enveloped his mind. Holy fuck. "I haven't got any other way to get home. Besides, I'm not drunk. I can manage walking a few blocks"–ha, afewdidn't mean sixteen–"I'll just be extra careful of anyone looking for a short person to capture."
"Here, I'll drive you."
The small teen frowned a little but then shrugged halfheartedly; obviously Duke wasn't about to back down so whatever. But it was when they got out there that things seemed to suddenly fall into perspective out of nowhere.
Yugi was buzzed, yes, but not stupid and piss-faced. He realized the moment that Duke opened the back door what he meant by "drive".
The small teen gave him a furious look. "Just because you buy me a drink doesn't mean shit," he snapped. Ha,buy. All he did was leave a few extra bills on the counter to make up for the vodka Yugi stole in the first place. That wasn'tbuyingsomeone a drink. It waspayingfor stolen property.
Duke raised an eyebrow at him. "You said you wanted a ride–"
"Not likethat!" he spat. "I meant in the car–"
The taller boy rolled his eyes and gestured. "It would beinthe car."
"As in buckled up, you actuallydrivingthe damncar, not trying to make merideyou in the backseat."
But the more he studied him, even with the haze in his mind, he knew for a fact that the older boy was drunk. And he had to wonder why he didn't notice this before. What the hell was wrong with him that he didn't recognize it?
Oh right, Yami was what was wrong with him.
When the kiss happened Yugi was reeling with the blow of dark red eyes narrowed into a look of hatred. When fingers traveled up his arm and cupped the back of his head, stroking the hair there, he was fighting off the burn of his aching heart. When the knee pressed between his legs, he was drowning in the memory of their little fuck in the bathroom. When he felt the hand on his cheek, he knew without a doubt that this was not Yami and that was why he pushed Duke hard.
The other boy stumbled.
"If I was looking for a fuck, I would have found one on my own!" he snarled. "In fact, I have a person who I do this with all the goddamned time. Granted we're"–he hiccupped and the noise threw him for a loop for a second before he remembered what he was saying–"fighting, butstill."
God, he wasn't even looking for someone else. He was just looking a way to drown out his problems and a farther club that was close enough he could walk but one where it wouldn't be obvious who he was or what he was doing, where the rumors wouldn't exist. Where he wouldn't feel the weight of his grandfather's disappointment towards his actions a mile away. And this had been the only place he could find–a gay bar, a gay bar that he hadn't even realized existed until this very moment, one that he would have avoided if he had realized it was a gay barbeforehe got there. But it had been too late for him to turn away and besides, the guy had paid for his stolen drink…
When he reached out, Yugi smacked his hand away. "Don't fucking touch me."
When he approached again, Yugi grabbed a stone and hurled it; the entire back windshield broke into glittering shards of raining glass that he admired for a split second before he was knocked down. He landed with a sharp thudding noise, with Duke weighing heavily on top of him.
And then they were rolling and pulling at each other's hair, snarling and fighting and kicking and punching; it was only after he landed a blow the nose that Duke faltered enough for him to knee him hard in the hip and slam his elbow into his ribs.
He was too buzzed to really remember what Yami had done to restrain him that day, what he had done to restrain Joey at school. But either way, the three hits made blood leak like a faucet and Duke punched out but he managed to twist out of the way, punching him in the lip and breathing hard.
And maybe he should have tried to talk Duke out of fighting him, warned him that he was drunk, told him to knock it off, but he didn't want to.
He wanted to fight.
He wanted to make him bleed.
So what kind of person did that make him?
When Duke stopped moving, only then did Yugi realize the extent of the damage he had caused. The taller boy's shirt was stained and blackened against the light of the streetlamp further off down the street. One of his teal eyes was already beginning to swell; his straight nose and pink lips were a bloody mess. He stumbled to his feet, took two tentative steps forward, peering down at the splatters of his blood that stained the dark asphalt of the road.
And relief flooded him slowly but surely when he saw his chest moving up and down quickly.
He groaned as he slowly turned on his side and spat out more blood onto the road, snarling, "Youwillpay for this windshield."
"Fuck you," Yugi spat, moving forward–presumably to kick him, he supposed; he didn't really know, because he was a little low on steam and tired and his right leg hurt like someone had blown it to pieces–but then merely shook his head slowly.
Duke finally got up from the ground in a slow, tentative movement, wincing several times on the way to his full height, before looking around for his keys slowly; when he finally got them, he limped over to the driver's seat, shooting him one last look over his shoulder.
It was only after he drove off that Yugi allowed himself to succumb to the pain in his leg, taking a seat and laying it out, hissing in pain when he tried to move it, pulling his phone out and dialing.
"Grandpa?"
The elderly Motou murmured a groggy, "Yugi? Where are you?"
"I…" Was the pain in his leg really worth all of this humiliation and sure-to-come disappointment that would mar his grandfather's face upon coming to pick him up? "Grandpa, I twisted my leg. And I can't walk. I'm…I'm buzzed."
For a moment he thought that Solomon would ask what that meant exactly but a small gentle sigh of "Oh Yugi" told him he knew exactly what it meant and the small boy couldn't help the tears that stung his eyes, the way that they fell down his cheeks like twin waterfalls.
Yugi looked his ass over, studying himself excessively in the full body mirror. He had a nice ass. A little fuller than Yami's, cuter, rounder, but where his was round and cute, Yami's had this strange quality that made you really lust after it. It was luscious, somewhat flat but with enough to it that it filled out his jeans nicely and left a lot of girls in school–before the whole incident anyways–practically drooling over it. Yugi remembered all the time he had listened to girls chatting about "the new kid's ass" freshman year.
He wiggled his bottom a couple of times and then smirked. If he could have fucked himself, he definitely would have, but he couldn't so he would have to settle for Yami's ass instead of his.
It was so odd because he had seen the red-eyed teen only a week ago, and yet he was starting to get impatient and every cell in his body wanted Yami close to him…or rather, close to his tongue and his penis, but still close to him in the physical sense. And it was so sickening because at some point he started staring at the couch as if it might turn into the taller boy and it was exciting in the most disgusting of ways.
He was like some kind of junky and that disgusted him on so many levels he couldn't even wrap his head around it. If that couchdidturn into Yami, he swore he'd pray every single day and slaughter a cow, dance around fire and bathe in the rain if he had to.
He knew he had problems with people being out of his life–his parents were never around, his grandfather was always away on expeditions for fuck's sake–but this was ridiculous. He had withdrawal symptoms. He was twitchy upon awakening–but that could have been the sex dreams–and he kept hoping that Yami would walk through the door. And then of course he berated himself for being an idiot because Yami could not walk through the door without knocking first and Yugilettinghim in and then his mind would go on a completely different path that at some point, onceagainended with sex.
He wasn't even sure how it happened and it made his head spin.
He jumped off his chair and got asfar awayas possible from the couch before the cushions turned into ass cheeks and ran his hands through his hair. He was definitely losing his shit.
He wanted–no, heneeded–to see Yami again.
The only problem was that he was not sure ifYamiwanted to seehim. Considering the shit storm that they had unleashed on each other, it would not surprise him in theleastif Yami did not want to speak to him–at all. He hadn't even gotten up the courage to call the taller teen, that's how badly he was scared he had ruined things between them.
Duke Devlin. He claimed he fucked the shit out Yugi in the backseat of his car.
Yugi had neither denied nor confirmed this because it took too much energy. It took too much energy trying to persuade people who had already made up their minds about him having taken it up the ass from the teal-eyed boy. Far too much energy trying to change their minds. He didn't want to waste more than he had to as it was.
He was so tired of that bastard. So he rejected him. So what?
It really shouldn't have been that surprising.
But the look Yami gave him when the rumor hit his ears, the way he seemed to crumble in on himself momentarily, the way, for that brief second, his eyes looked haunted as if someone had just killed him, had killedhiminside.
And it was worse because the red-eyed boy refused to look at him again afterwards. He didn't look over in his general direction. He didn't even bother raising his head when the teacher called his name to ask how their project was going.
And the teacher's reaction to his silence, the way he wouldn't answer, was anything but good. Yami was written up for not behaving when someone claimed that he had done that to them–and he had, so he was forced to do the same to Yami–and the red-eyed teen had snatched the slip from him, torn it up, and walked out of class without a second glance.
Dear gods, things really were fucking up, weren't they?
"I agree to your terms."
Yami was leaning back in his seat across from his father, across from Seto, across from his lawyer Rafael who would give him strange looks every now and then. Almost as if he expected him to show fear in the face of the man before him.
But Yami didn't.
Because, around his neck, was the Puzzle.
And it shone a million different ways in the fluorescent lights.
"Then drop the lawsuit," he stated in a bored tone, not really paying attention to what was going on, more preoccupied with the things in his head that wouldn't leave. Of course Yugi had gone and gotten fucked. Why wouldn't he? That was what he did. He had fuck buddies. He didn't date.
He fucked and had fun with it. He pushed and pushed until you couldn't take it anymore.
And Yami hated himsomuch because of this. But it made so much sense and he felt so stupid for not realizing how pointless it was to eventhink for a secondthat Yugi would do anything else.
But Duke Devlin?
He glowered at a spot just behind his father's head, wishing he could bore a hole through it.
Duke Devlin was a piece of shit.
He used people and tossed them aside.
He commonly fucked with people–not physically but emotionally, mentally, beat them down and didn't bother to see if they got back up again.
But the black eye he sported, the busted lip, the way he winced every now and then when he breathed…
What if it hadn't been consensual?
What if he had raped him?
Yami thought it over. That would explain Yugi's silence.
Maybe. Possibly.
Ha, Yugi would be silent either fucking way.
Yami rolled his eyes as his father's lawyer started talking and his eyes flickered towards Seto who narrowed his gaze and gave him a warning look that he pointedly returned with a glare.
The day she came Yami was working on the project. And it was stupid, because he didn't know what the fuck he was supposed to do with it anymore, but he was still working on it. Three weeks…he didn't understand why the teacher gave them an extra three weeks. It was awkward and strange, but he supposed it was because the beginning of second half of the semester would beafterall the major tests and projects they had for other classes.
Or maybe he was taking pity on him. Maybe after he had gotten written up and left the room, he decided that things weren't going well between him and Yugi and just decided to move the date further back for them. It was possible. After all, as he had said, Yami was apparently his best student.
And what teacherwouldn'ttry to help out their best student if they had the chance?
He definitely wasn't complaining. Of course not. Not when he and Yugi didn't have a single thing done but the sixty-page essay that Yugi still needed to revise completely for them to make sure that there were no punctuation mistakes.
It was kind of funny, because his literature teacher didn't even pay as much attention to his punctuation as his history teacher did.
He wasn't expecting anyone when he opened the door and he definitely never expected her to be there–not once in a million years.
His stomach twisted and his fight-or-flight instinct made his body thrum with energy beneath his skin, his muscles preparing, his entire being going rigid and his breathing quickening for a split moment.
"M-mother," he managed to get out, wide-eyed. "W-what are you–? Is father–?"
"Atem."
She sounded so proud and yet so heartbroken it was overwhelming.
And Yami wasn't delusion. He knew the pride was merely because he looked okay, because he wasn't dead or something. And he knew the heartbreak. Because he mirrored it.
But he still wanted to sink into the depths of her voice, drown in it, hear her sing songs to him to make him fall asleep at night, in that sweet tone that relaxed him no matter how bad things really got.
But no, the time had passed for that. He was alone in this.
Neither his mother nor his father would accept it.
And that was why she was here.
"Father said you never wanted to see me again," he muttered, because he had; not in those exact words, but the context of it was the same.My wifenotyour mother.My wife.
She took a deep breath, sighed through her nose, stepped inside, walked past him, waited for him to close the door, turned around…
"Oh, Atem, tell me it's not true."
He shook his head. "I cannot do that."
She stared and her dark gray-blue-red-flecked eyes watered. "Please, tell me it's not true."
He shook his head again. "Denial will help no one."
"It's not true. Tell me it's not true!"
"It's true," he snapped. "It's true. I am gay."
The slap was hard and sent him stumbling but he didn't fall, merely glancing at her.
"You say that almost as if you are proud!" she spat, shaking her head with the beginning of tears in her eyes.
Yami didn't answer her, because he just got tired of her denial. He wasn't proud of it. Years of living with them made him fully ashamed of himself. But what would be the point of saying this? It would ease no one's pain. And if she wished to think that he was proud of himself for this, that was her own right.
She was entitled to being wrong.
It didn't matter to him anyways.
It would all be over soon enough.
And after…
Well, there really wasn't much of an after that he knew of.
Right now, he only had the strength to deal with the present.
"How could you be proud of such a thing?" she cried, shaking her head as a tear leaked from her left eye. "It makes no sense. We raised you better than this! We raised you to be the best and you've turned into…a lowlife child like the rest of them at that stupid school!"
He didn't argue. He didn't have the strength to do something that would change nothing. He was tired. He wanted to get the stupid project done. He wanted high school over. He wanted to be able to drop it all and then just go to the next continent that caught his attention. Maybe Europe…possibly Australia. Fuck, he'd go to Antarctica if only there were people there and he wouldn't be allowed to wallow on his mistakes.
"You will always be my mother, as he will always be my father. That is biology. But biology is fickle. You may have passed a lot to me by DNA, but you did not pass along your intolerance or stupidity. You can disown me all you would like, but that does not mean much because you both have already proved that whatever strengths you may have once possessed, have been swallowed by thought processes and natural instincts to become seriously flawed. How you feel about me is yours to shuffle as you see fit. But this is about you two, not me."
Another slap made him stumble but did not knock him to his knees.
"This is about you two–your inadequacies, your ignorance, your inability to accept, your fears of what others think of you. But you both used to pretend you were so selfless when it came to me. But selfishness is exactly what this all boils down to. Not once have either of you asked how I have dealt with this. Did you think Iwantedthis? No, of course I didn't. And of course it never crossed your minds. All you two haveeverthought of is yourselves. My upbringing was so that you two would look better, not because of you wanted the best for me."
"Ra would never have intended for this lifestyle. You should get on your knees and pray for forgiveness from our god."
Yami stared blankly. "Ra? You dare to bringRainto this?" he spat. "Ra has no bearing upon anything! And how would you know what a god wishes, mother? You are not a god, no matter how much you wish to be. Father will never make it as high as he seeks to reach because you both pretend that you know the work of a higher power when you knownothing!"
He felt like he might be foaming at the mouth but it felt right and he didn't want to stop, so despite her horrified expression, like he had struck her, he continued.
"Even if Ra cared so deeply about the life ofoneinsignificant speck on one planet in a universe compiled of trillions of other planets, what makes you think that you know the desires of agod?" He shook his head and glared at her. "What happened to what you used to tell me when I was young, mother? What happened to 'No matter what you do, where you go, or who you become, I will always love you, I will always protect you, and you will always be my little boy, always and forever'–what happened to that? Have I changed so much that you can't possibly love me anymore?"
This time he didn't even stagger, but she did. She fell into him and they both went to the ground on their knees. Yami wasn't sure what possessed him to stay where he was, because as much as he loved her with everything he had, he wanted away from her–so far away.
She was crying and he should have cared–and maybe in the deepest recesses of his mind, where his heart actuallywasbreaking with the blow of it all, he truly did–but the energy was too much. He was still so, so tired…
Okay, so he hadn't expected her to look him in the eye and hand him a box of condoms and lube and tell him to go find a nice guy with her blessing, but this shit was ridiculous. What the hell was so horrible about it all?
He didn't understand it, not even after having it drilled in his head for so long.
Sure, it scared him, but he was okay. He was healthy. He was fine. He wasn't dying. Ra had not decided to kill him. Ra had done nothing to punish him–his own bad choices were his punishment…Yugiwas his punishment. But that was it.
Whathadhappened to her?
To saying "No matter what you do, where you go, or who you become, I will always love you, I will always protect you, and you will always be my little boy, always and forever" every night before bed? He had missed her so much in those two years he had been gone. He had stayed up his whole first month because she never said it.
Perhaps…somewhere along the line, they all changed.
And he was okay with that. He was okay with being too independent to need her words every night. And he was okay with being strong enough to actually stand up to his father at moments when he truly needed to. And he was okay with being different.
What he wasn't okay with was their acting as if he was not their son, like they didn't know him anymore, like he was a stranger, completely disposable and easy to replace.
No tears came from his eyes like he thought they might have months before.
Instead he merely hugged her tightly, didn't bother to say anything else. Didn't bother to say he loved her.
He did, but the words wouldn't come out of his mouth. He still loved her so much…
"You will not receive a blessing for the shame you have brought upon us."
She was sobbing into his chest but her voice was strong despite it.
He wondered where he got his strength from. His mother or his father…
"But please, don't expect any further communication with me, with your father, with us," she begged, though her voice still held that undercurrent of strength. "We will not come to visit, nor do we want you in our lives. You have made your choice–however wrong it may be. Ra did not intend for this unnatural lifestyle and if you are ever to return to Egypt…do not ever seek us out again. I wish you only the best in life."
Yami stood up first, because that was what his gut told him to do, and when he offered his hand, she took it for what they both knew would be the last time. "I understand," was all he said in response.
She took his face in her hands, held him there, stared deep into his eyes, and then turned and walked off.
Yami didn't bother to watch her departure.