Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ The Boys of Summer ❯ Joe Momma ( Chapter 4 )

Well I know that I'm writing this fic for my own health now, but to my friends who review thanks a lot and thanks for Tracy too, now the world knows your life. Everyone it all goes out to Tracy!!! So yeah just before I begin I want to tell you that in this story Seto's nickname is Traki okay? And then Pegasus's nickname is Peggie. Then Yami and Yugi have these weird pet names going on, Yami calls Yugi Snoggy, while Yugi calls Yami his Skank. Hehe so funny.

The Boys of Summer

Joe Momma

***

Have you ever seen those shirts that on the front say `Joe' and on the back say `Momma'? Let's just say that later on when I pick that up, that'll seem like Childs play joking when you hear about what Yami and Bakura were talking about today. Whew, now that was funny as hell!

Anyway, so we were sitting under our usual tree talking about nothing really, we were just watching Traki teach Jounouchi how to do some belly dancing to Celtic music. It's very calming, but of course with this group that calm thing doesn't last for long.

"I have three simple rules to life Bakura, that even you, a dumb as could follow." Bakura growled and I winced, what was my Skank gonna get himself into now?!

"Yeah what's that Skank?" What?! No he did NOT just use my nickname for him. I got up and was about to pounce on him but Seto and Jounouchi pulled me back. "Let me the hell go you chickens!!!" I struggled and "accidentally" kicked Seto where You KNOW it hurts, but I didn't care.

I was gonna get Bakura, or have to talk with Ryou later….muwhahaha.

"One, you burn calories by hitting your head against the wall. Two, NEVER give hobos money on Wednesdays, they buy crack," Bakura rolled over and started rolling on the ground laughing. And I did too, and so did Ryou and we were laughing like Bakura's momma!

Hahaha! Anyway we stopped to hear the last rule, "And third, and most importantly don't shop at Albertson's! Thank you and have a nice day!" I snickered and everybody just looked at him really confused like what the fuck was that about?

"Yami, your such a crack head, you fucker"

"Yes and I'm proud of it." He better be kidding me, I thought I hid the coca puffs from him this morning! I better check under his bed. Only Ra knows what he keeps under there. It's so wrong last time I found…never mind!

"Well you know what Yami, YOUR MOMMA'S A DUCK!"

"IS NOT MAN!"

"IS TOO YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

"WELL THEN YOUR MOMMA'S A ASTRONAUT!" Bakura yelled at him. I'm not even going to try to break them up. Seto wouldn't hold me back because he's too busy holding his family jewels right now because of what I've done to him. See I'm not so weak I can stand up for myself if I want to and Seto just got hit the hard way.

The REALLY hard way! Lmao (1) Anyway I'll just sit back here until they start to hit at each other and then me and Ryou will step on in. For now I grinned and Ryou and he grinned back and we started sipping on gin and juice. (2)

"Well you know what SKANK? HUH? YOUR MOMMA'S A MUMMY!"

crowd goes-Ooooo!

Yami narrowed his eyes and pounced on Bakura and screamed "I KNOW THAT DAMN IT! Why did you have to bring my mummy into this! She's living it up right now in Egypt! That wasn't cool!"

I stared. What's he talking about?

"YOUR MOMMA LAYS BRICKS AMONG OTHER THINGS!" Yami grabbed a handful of Bakura's hair and held him up. Uh oh, damn I was just starting to like drinking this gin and juice, it's hella good! I giggled and hiccupped. I'm bad.

Crowd goes-Ooooo! No he didn't! (ghettofied voice)

"Well you know what BITCH?! You sleep with your momma! Your dad! Your sisters and your brothers! And! And Malik's Mom and Seto's mom!!" he said in a cool voice and jabbed Yami in the gut.

SKANK! NOOO!!! I will not get up, I was chilling with Ryou! Who looks like he is laughing like a hyena at his lover boy right now…

"Hey watch it!" Seto growled and looked over at me and sweat dropped. He has now figured out my secret strength. Ha! Yeah but anyway Malik and Seto were kind of teamed up now, holding hands, and will you look at that Marik doesn't look too happy about it either. "Hey Ryou"

"Yeah?" he swung his head over and looked at me.

"I bet you a penny that Marik bites Seto in the next five minutes."

"Deal." Hmm what a easy way to make a penny! Anyway back to this fight we have going on here that was just getting better and better. I think in five minutes we'll break it up.

"BAKURA YOU SLEPT WITH NOT ONLY YOUR MOM, YOUR DOG! No offense Jounouchi, various inanimate objects, and Marik's mom! And not to mention JOUNOUCHI'S MOM!"

"WHO'S TALKING ABOUT ME?" we all turned and looked Jounouchi and Bakura's mom straight in the eye. It wasn't pretty. Yami gulped and looked at me as if asking for help. I just shrugged. But what really got me was seeing Yami's mom!

I mean IT'S YAMI'S MOM! I THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD!

And then the women starting to fight with each other calling one another big fat cows and what not, Bakura's mom saying that she should through Yami's mom into the Nile. Jounouchi mom commenting on the lack of dog food and a good decent tennis ball was so hard to find these days.

And then it got really quiet. Oh no a war was about to hit. And then finally it happened.

"DIIIIEEEE!!!!" Marik flung out at Seto and bit his arm and Ryou quickly tossed me a penny. Marik jumped on Malik who fell on the ground with Marik snuggling up to him. Jounouchi started to growl like the dog that he was and pounced on Yami who was still tangled with Bakura.

"Joe Momma!" Bakura whispered back over to Yami but I kept my hold on him.

Ryou was heaving and right when he was about to jump at them I stopped him and we both went up and pulled our lovers away. I glared at Skank and whispered "bad Skank! I'll teach you a lesson tonight!" but then I thought he'd like that. Not if I can get under his bed first!

Ryou was pulling Bakura way by his ear. And Bakura was whimpering. I mean WHIMPERING! And just then Peggie came by with the lacrosse sticks to see everyone tearing each other to shreds.

"STOP!!!!!! I HAVE SPOKEN!" then everyone stopped and you could only hear the little crickets in the distance.

"ALL OF YOU GET UP RIGHT NOW YOU LITTLE CRAPERS! DON'T MAKE ME HAVE TO YELL AT YOU LIKE THIS AGAIN I SHOULD DROWN YOU LITTLE FUCKERS IN THE LAKE! RA DAMN IT! I SHOULD PUT YOU OVER MY KNEE AND SPANK THE LIVING DAY LIGHTS OUT OF YOU!" I cringed and started to zone out.

The mom's just crept away and I don't even know how the hell they to there in the first place, but what the fuck ever you know. Ah shit. We're in trouble now, here comes Tea, I figured out she's one of the head counselors. She lightly tapped Peggie's shoulder and he whipped around.

He suddenly got all pale and then she pulled him over into the shade of a tree and gave all these angry whispers. It looked like he started to zone out too and came back to us.

"Alright everyone" he sighed and we had basically made a silent truce with each other.

"Let's play some lacrosse." And we all followed him out to the grass field.

***

Okay that turned out much better than I expected! Please review tell me I am not deceiving myself! Whoot, whoot!!!!!!! Yeah baby! Thanks so much Tracy I finally got it out there, but I think I made it just a little bit better I added a few things of my own like gin and juice so it's all good in the end for real yo! Not…

-Valea

(1) If you guys don't know what this means I should kick you in the mouth. It means Laughing my ass off!!!

Well there's this song by Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre and yeah it's a ghettofied song. That's all you need to know, email me at Sk8rboisgeil88@aol.com if you want lyrics.