Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ The Nitpicker's Guide to Yu-Gi-Oh ❯ The Gauntlet is Thrown ( Chapter 2 )

Disclaimer#18: I own Yu-Gi-Oh. All right, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. Why must you continue to torment me!?

Author's Notes: Well here it is chapter 2, the second episode. Now they're getting screwy with math. It's basic math and they mess up!

Mistake#1

Quoting Joey: Yeah Tea, like that wimpy card (some fairy with 800atk500def power) has a chance against my giant rock guy (Rock Ogre 800atk1200def)

Why-

Yami: If she put it in attack mode she could wipe out the Rock Ogre. So she did have a chance.

Tea: I still won.

Mistake#2

Quoting Joey: Tristan's right, I do stink.

Why-

Kaiba: Tristan's not right. Tristan's never right.

Joey: You are so lucky were aloud one fake mistake.

Kaiba: Most of the mistakes in this episode are yours.

Mistake#3

Quoting Yugi: Joey, your deck's filled with nothing but monster cards.

Quoting Joey: You got it. I packed it with every butt kickin' monster I could find.

Why-

Bakura: Joey, why wouldn't you want magic and trap cards in your deck? Even a novice knows they're very helpful.

Kaiba: And I don't know what a "butt kickin'" monster is to you, but it's not a Rock Ogre.

Joey: Well, uh, it would be completely immune to the Crush Card Virus. Take that.

Mistake#4

Quoting Joey: Tea beat me 3 games in a row.

Quoting Yugi: Actually Tea beat you 5 time in a row, Joey.

Why-

Tea: How could you not know the number of games you played?

Joey: When you lose 5 times in a row the games just start to blur together.

Kaiba: Stop trying to rationalize your mistakes. It's getting annoying.

Mistake#5

Grandpa: I could teach you to be a great tournament duelist. But only if you're willing to spend endless days and sleepless nights filled with rigorous training.

Why-

Joey: Just a game Gramps. Don't have to go crazy.

Yugi: Don't say that to him. He cares a lot about the game.

Kaiba: That would explain him owning a game shop.

Joey: I thought Yugi owned it.

Mistake#6

Quoting Joey: *bowing to Yugi* Please Yugi, help me convince him. I will work hard I promise.

Why-

Yami: Shouldn't you be bowing to Grandpa? He's the one you want to train you.

Joey: Well ya see, the reason for that is that, uh *trails off*

Kaiba: Also, this is just an observation, but when Joey got on the ground Yugi stepped back and was standing in this really girly way. We know he's a little prissy but come on.

Yami: *to self* Look who's talking.

Mistake#7

Quoting Yugi: Joey, he already said that he can't do it and if he can't do it, he can't do it.

Quoting Grandpa: I never said I couldn't do it.

Why-

Kaiba: Get a thesaurus!

Mistake#8

Quoting Grandpa: You do know what a trap card is, don't you?

Quoting Joey: Kinda, uh, I have no idea.

Why-

Grandpa: You were the one who first taught him to play and you didn't tell him what a trap card is?

Yugi: Oops.

Mistake#9

Quoting Joey: *smiling VERY happily* Sure rub it in.

Why-

Tea: Okay.

Joey: I was being sarcastic.

Tea: You looked so happy.

Yugi: I'm not the only one with facial feature issues.

Mistake#10

Quoting Grandpa: *with a worried look and harsh voice!* Not by a long shot you slacker.

Why-

Bakura: Must run in the family.

Yami: Not funny.

Bakura: Look at them. Their laughing *points to, well, you*

Yami: *looks at, uh, you* Stop that.

Mistake#11

Joey goes to hug Grandpa, Grandpa moves and Joey stays in the air for a while. Then he falls.

Why-

Kaiba: I don't care if this is an anime that's not possible. Not without magic.

Joey: Fake mistake.

Kaiba: No it's not.

Mistake#12

Quoting Yugi: *with a VERY angry look on his face yet speaking as if he's surprised* Is it possible they heard I beat the world champion?

Quoting Tea: You mean, Kaiba?

Quoting Yugi: *still angry, but now speaking sympathetically* Yeah it wasn't an official match or anything, but Kaiba did drop out of the tournament because of me.

Why-

Joey: You really outta stop lookin' so pissed when you're talkin'. People might get the wrong idea.

Yugi: Dubbers.

Joey: I thought you were national champion.

Kaiba: Stupid dubbers.

Tea: Look on the bright side. This fic wouldn't be here if it weren't for them.

Mistake#13

Quoting Announcer: Of the 200 duelists that competed in this marathon tournament, only 2 competitors remain standing.

Quoting Joey from later on: Yugi, these guys any good?

Quoting Yugi: Oh yeah. They're both pretty tough customers.

Why-

Bakura: Two out of 200 is pretty good.

Kaiba: And sure, Yugi knows the people who aren't even champions yet, but does he know the world champ? No.

Yugi: Never said I didn't know. Just never said I did *nervous smile*

Mistake#14

Quoting Tea: I know you've been training for weeks.

Quoting Joey from later on: Itsy bitsy bugs against duelin' dinosaurs, Raptor has got this one in the bag.

Why-

Kaiba: Weeks, and you still haven't learned that Duel Monsters isn't all brawn.

Joey: Shut up.

Mistake#15

Tristan: Whoa guys, Raptor just stomped Weevil!

Quoting Announcer from a short time later: And Raptor plays the strongest card in his deck, the terrible Two-headed King Rex (1600atk)

Why-

Bakura: So many screw-ups.

Raptor: Why would I have to play another card if I had just "stomped" Weevil? In fact neither of us had any monster cards on the field. That doesn't make sense.

Kaiba: The strongest card in your deck is 1600atk points strong?

Weevil: No wonder why you lost.

Mistake#15

Quoting Yugi: *again with angry expression* Maybe, but I wouldn't doubt Weevil.

Why-

Yami: Dubbers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mistake#16

Quoting Pegasus: And as regional champion I invite you to take part in a brand new tournament at Duelist Kingdom.

Quoting Guy from later on: With the announcement you've made tonight we'll have thousands of duelist flocking the Duelist Kingdom.

Why-

Pegasus: What announcement? The only person I spoke to was Weevil.

Weevil: Yes, when you invited me. Invited me!! I had to be invited while everyone else can just come on in!!!!!!!

Pegasus: Oh, don't listen to that guy. He doesn't even have a name.

Mistake#17

Grandpa says "The famous Maximillion Pegasus sends greetings to my Yugi?"

Grandpa's face says "If that guy ever talks to my boy again I'll kill him!"

Why-

Yugi: It does run in the family ^_^

Mistake#18

Yami's eyes are lopsided!

Why-

Yami: I don't know why they're lopsided.

Kaiba: They've had weird art the entire episode.

Yami: But do they have to make my right eye bigger than the left one?

Mistake#19

Pegasus uses Dragon Capture Jar on the Komori Dragon. Yami never officially played the dragon.

Why-

Pegasus: Well, I was already cheating so, uh *trails off*

Mistake#20

Quoting Yami thinking: This is crazy. First he reads my mind then he brings the monster on my card to life!

Why-

Yami: Even though I was the one who blasted the evil out of Seto Kaiba last episode and I did see the monsters come to life. Shouldn't be that big of a surprise.

Pegasus: The, um, holograms aren't as real?

Kaiba: They look exactly alike.

Mistake#21

Quoting Yami: It's a good story Pegasus, but these monsters can't be real.

Why-

Kaiba: They can have a heart and soul, but they can't be real? That "Heart of the Cards" stuff is confusing.

Mistake#22

To get the number to subtract from a person's LP (when it's 2 attacking monsters) subtract the difference between the atk power. Let's see, Silver Fang (1200; Yami's) attacks Komori Dragon (1500; Pegasus'). 1500-1200= 300 2000-300= 1500?

Why-

Yami: Miscalculations.

Pegasus: Why did you send a weaker monster to attack a stronger one.

Yami: That's what I'm wondering.

Mistake#23

Pegasus: So completely ignorant of the power of your Millennium Puzzle.

Why-

Bakura: Except when he blasted the evil in Kaiba away.

Mistake#24

Quoting Pegasus: He locked these magical energies in 7 mystical Millennium Items.

Quoting Yami: You're saying…my puzzle's one of them.

Quoting Joey from EP. One: …and you've got the Millennium Puzzle.

Why-

Yami: Joey knows and I don't!?

Mistake#25

Quoting Yami thinking: What happens if I draw a new card straight from the deck without even looking at it?

Why-

Joey: Could've drawn a magic card.

Yami: Quiet Mr. I-packed-it-with-every-butt-kicken'-monster-I-could-find.

Mistake#26

Dark Magician (2500; Yami's) attacks Komori Dragon (1500; Pegasus') 2500-1500=1000 2000-1000= 1200!?

Why-

Joey: Even I know it should be *starts counting on fingers* 1100.

Kaiba: *sigh* Pathetic. Who did the math for this episode?

Yugi: Dubbers?

Yami: No, even in the original they messed up on the math.

Bakura: Dubbers always pick the wrong time to translate it correctly.

Mistake#27 (officially passed the # of mistakes in EP. 1)

Quoting Yami: My Dark Magician is one of the strongest magic cards in the game.

Why-

Kaiba: *rolls eyes* King of Games indeed.

Yami: Quiet, I beat you last episode.

Kaiba: *eyes go teary, starts crying*

Mistake#28

Quoting Pegasus: The player with the highest life points will be the winner.

Quoting Yami from later on: It's still standing and I'm running out of time. *thinking* I'm up by 300 LP, but only because Pegasus is toying with me. I've gotta find I way to beat him at his own shadow game.

Why-

Kaiba: *wiping eyes* You could've stalled. You're good at it.

Bakura: If you had so little time left you should've waited. Why risk losing?

Yami: …………………………̷ 0;………………………… 230;…………

Mistake#29

Quoting Pegasus: This is the fearsome Faceless Mage.

Quoting Yami: I've never seen that card before.

Quoting Yami from later: The Faceless Mage doesn't have a Dark Magic attack.

Why-

Pegasus: You knew how?

Yami: Magic.

Tea: Always magic.

Mistake#30

10 seconds left on the clock

Quoting Yami: Time's not up just yet Pegasus, and you've left your Faceless Mage vulnerable to a physical assault.

Why-

Kaiba: Even I wouldn't gloat if I had that much time left.

Bakura: *clicks tongue*

Mistake#31

Quoting Yami: It's got to do something to do with that weird eye of his.

Quoting Pegasus from later on: I to posses one of the Seven Millennium Items. The all-powerful Millennium Eye.

Quoting Yami: *gasp of surprise*

Why-

Yami: I already saw it.

Pegasus: You should notice it's a Millennium Item.

Yami: Okay, I've made a lot of mistakes. Too many. Let's end it here.

Author's Notes: I think I might have missed some since I had to pause the tape so many times to write down the mistakes. Also I've got a little trivia question for anyone who wants to answer (digitalmoonprincess@address.com). In the Yu-Gi-Oh dub, what was the first episode we saw Bakura in?