Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Yu-Gi-Oh! My Way... ❯ The Incredibly Hot Seto Kaiba... *drool* ( Chapter 1 )

`Yu-Gi-Oh!' My Way...

R - Humor/Romance - Author: Lady Love

Disclaimer (Seto): LL does not own anything except for the three P's. Paper, pencil, and plot. And if you lawyers decide to sue... v.vU I will pay for LL out of my big stack of money.

LL: YAY! Seto-chan! *glomps Seto*

Seto: LL, you're an idiot. *looks at title of fanfic* ... Oh... God...

LL: Wanna know what your personality is?

Seto: *raises eyebrow*

LL: *whispers in Seto's ear*

Seto: Uh-huh... Uh-huh... UNH-UNH! Oo You're not making me... _THAT_!

LL: *giggles* I think it'll be cute! And you need a personality change, anyway.

Seto: Just... Start this God-be-damned fic...

LL: *to readers* I skip some scenes because I have nothing super funny to put in there. And they really don't add to the plot. And in this chappie... There will be Yami/Yugi. And everyone already knows about Yami, `cause I felt like doing it that way. `My Way...' (By the way, these are MY titles for the episodes... Hehehehehe...)

***

Episode 1: The Incredibly Hot Seto Kaiba... *drool*

(Yugi, Jou (Joey), Honda (Tristan), Anzu (Téa), and Sugoroku (Solomon, Grandpa) were in the Kame (Turtle) Game Shop, discussing, well... Duel Monsters. DUH!!! Anyway, Seto Kaiba walks into the shop. Carrying his silver briefcase. And wearing that blue, possessed trenchcoat of his. God forbid! A guy shouldn't be that hot! *drool, swoon, faint*)

Jou: Kaiba?! What's he doin' here?

Grandpa: Hello. May I help you?

Seto: Yes, you can. I've heard that you have somehow obtained one of the legendary Blue Eyes White Dragon cards.

Grandpa: *getting suspicious* ... Aaaand?...

Seto: I'd like to see it.

Grandpa: Well... I don't... Ahh, I'm sure it won't do much harm... *pulls out box, opens it, BEWD card is inside*

Yugi: Wow, Grandpa. Is that the card that your friend gave you?

Grandpa: Yes, it is, Yugi.

Seto: *walks over to counter, looks at card* So... The rumors are true, then? *pauses* What would you trade for it?

Grandpa: Absolutely nothing! I'd never trade this card for anything!

Yugi: Because it's from your friend. And even if it was a common card, you still wouldn't trade it. Right, Grandpa?

Grandpa: Right, Yugi.

Seto: *opens suitcase, a bunch of cards are in it* These... *pints to BEWD card* ... For that.

Jou: Whoa. That's a lotta' cards.

Grandpa: The answer is still no.

Seto: *puts away suitcase, pulls out another silver suitcase, opens it, porno and swimsuit editions of various magazines are inside* How about these?

Everyone: Oo

Grandpa: *looks at card, then at magazines, ..........................grabs magazines and runs off laughing insanely*

Yugi: Oo Grandpa was never this perverted.

Seto: *ignoring them all, picks up card* Finally! The fourth Blue Eyes White Dragon! HAHAHA!!!

Yugi: *walks up to Seto* Give. It. Back.

Seto: *pockets card* You'll have to get it yourself. *wink*

Yugi: OO *blush*

Seto: *whispers* You know, you're so damn cute when you blush like that. *normal voice* I'll be leaving, now. *winks again at Yugi*

Yugi: *now a deep shade of red* I guess... I'll... Have to... Duel him... To get that card back...

~Later...~

Yugi: /Yami? Are you going to help me get Grandpa's card back?/

Yami: //Of course, aibou. *kiss*//

Yugi: /*blush, smile*/

Yami: //*chuckles*//

Jou: Yo, Yug'?!

Yugi: What? Oh. Sorry, Jou. I was talking to Yami.

Jou: Yes. _Talking_.

Yugi: *blush*

Jou: Heh, heh. *grin*

Yugi: *looks up and sees the KaibaCorp building* Whoa. Well, here we go. *walks towards building*

*Everyone follows.*

Anzu: We'll do it together, Yugi.

Yugi: Right... <I wish she would just die. She has this stupid crush on me.>

Yami: //It's a love triangle. Honda likes Anzu. So now he's preaching friendship, too.//

Yugi: /Oh, man! No stars out!/

Yami: //*laughs*//

*Everyone is inside the building and the dueling arena room and stuff.*

Seto: *smirks* Welcome, Yugi. *glares* ... And his... Friends.

Anzu: Give Yugi's grandpa's card back! If you ever want to be Yugi's friend--

Yugi: *groan*

Anzu: -- You'll give it back. Right now!... *keeps ranting on and on*

Seto: <Stop, breathe, count to three... Stop, breathe, count to three... Stop, breathe-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!> *pulls out gun* DIE, YOU RETCHED GIRL-MONSTER!!! *shoots Anzu*

Anzu: XP (dead)

Honda: *falls to his knees* NOOOOO! MY ONE TRUE LOVE! You made me see what true friendship is all about. I cannot live without you! *dies* XP

Yugi: Oo Have you ever heard Honda talk before?

Jou: Oo No. You?

Seto: *puts gun away* Now. Yugi. Shall we duel?

Yugi: Yes! I want that card back!

Seto: Fine. But we could always have the duel someplace else...

Yugi: But isn't this-- OO *blush*

Jou: Wadda ya' mean, `someplace'-- Oo <Man. I guess he's gay. *pause* ALRIGHT! BLACKMAIL!>

Yugi: Umm... This arena is fine. Let's duel! YU-GI-OHHHHHHHH! *Yami takes over Yugi*

Seto: *swoon*

Yami: *steps up on dueling podium*

Seto: *does the same*

Seto and Yami: Let's duel!

*The podiums move up, 2000 life points appear on the... box-thing, and they begin dueling. And... (*presses fast forward button* OO *stops suddenly and presses play* What's this doing on here?! OTOGI?! *Otogi is doing a strip dance on the video* The hell?... *drool, snaps back into reality, fast forwards some more*)... Seto has just put down his third BEWD. Yami has 4/5 of the Exodia pieces.*

Yami: <If I believe in the heart of the cards, I can win any duel. *draws card, it's a......................................................................... Kuriboh* ... Damn! Why do I have this thing in my deck?!>

Yugi: /Yami! I _really_ don't like to hear you curse!/

Yami: //But I had four of the five Exodia pieces--//

Yugi: /That's no excuse!/

Yami: //And Kaiba has his big dragons that are about to wipe out the last of my life points--//

Yugi: /So? I don't want you cursing!/

Yami: //And I just drew a Kuriboh...//

Yugi: /... Shit./

Yami: //¬_¬ ...//

Seto: Aren't you going to summon another one of your pathetic monsters?

Yami: <v.vU They _are_ pathetic, aren't they?> ... *sigh* No...

Seto: Fine. *draws card* I attack you with my Blue Eyes! White Lightning Attack!

*The dragons polish off the last of Yami's life points. Yami and Seto get off of the dueling arena.*

Seto: Even though you're a terrible duelist, Yami, you still got that hot body of yours. *pumps fist into the air* I won! HAHA! No one can defeat me! I'm still the regional champion and always will be!

Yami: Oh, shut UP! *hits Seto on the back of the head*

Seto: Xx (knocked out) * spirit-type-thingy comes out of Seto's body* (METS-Seto, or More-Evil-Tan-Seto, -Seto)

Yami: Oo *sends it to the shadow realm for no apparent reason, sighs, walks off grumbling*

Mokuba: *runs up to Seto, shakes him* BIG BROTHER! Are you alright?!

Seto: @.@ (swirly eyes) I sEe LiTtLe WhItE dRaGoNs WiTh PrEtTy BlUe EyEs. Uhh... Xx

Mokuba: Seto?! SETO?! Wake up! *shakes him extremely roughly*

Seto: @.@ Xx @.@ Xx @.@ Xx...

~End of Episode One~